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Words and Faith Connection

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Nissim Black

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So, this year, it's giving me the illumination of the soul. So, Zechariah and Hava and Chaim Viona. And also the illumination of the soul of Michael ben Ari. God bless his soul. Okay. His soul should have a good life. God bless his soul. Um so, last time we left off, we were talking about a person having emunah in himself. So, he brought up the fact that Rebbeinu would say to uh Rav Nosson, we brought up the story one time that he told Rav Nosson that you you have emunah, but in yourself, you don't have emunah. All right? So, for for Rav Nosson who felt on himself he was a big man, and he he he was taken aback a little bit by this. But, we see that even after some time he knew that this was true cuz Rav Rav Nosson, when he was looking at other people who were greater than him, and he saw that there were people much bigger than him, and didn't understand, you know, Rebbeinu said, "You're not allowed to ask this question." Which made me think about this uh very, very similar um exchange happened between the Ari and Chaim Vital. Also, too, cuz the Chaim Vital also didn't think of himself as something worthy, and he thought also there were greater people in the in the generation, but he he's the one that has the has the opportunity and the skills to to be the, you know, the main outlet of the Ari. And the Ari went on to reveal to him that, you know, you know, all the the different gilgulim and different things that he had that, you know, let him know. And then but he also told him, he says, "You know, the fee what you're fighting in your generation compared to what the Tanoim and other people in their generation said, completely different matters. So, you So, when I say that you're you're huge, you're big, you need to know that you're big. And each and every person needs to know that about themselves that I'm huge, I'm big. Any gadol I'm a mensch. I'm something special, and I'm something very, very big. And and Hashem put me here in the world that right now, whatever it is that Hashem wants and needs to be accomplished through me, it can only be accomplished through through me. Hashem and Hashem designed it that way. Hashem wanted it to be that way. So, a person has to have a moon in himself, whatever he's encountering in his life. And and and quiet is kept is one of the hardest things for a person to actually do. Like we all feel very self-confident in things that we know well. But what happens when you come to things that you don't feel like you know so well? When you come to a certain place and you feel like really I really I'm not holding over here. I'm not holding. Sometimes you should it's better off to not act like you know that you're holding and you're not holding. But but but a lot of times Hashem saying it's time for you to step up and and and I'm and I'm calling for you to do it right now. A person has to have a moon in themselves. So, it's a very very important. And he brought over there that some tzaddikim have opposition because of it. So, they have opposition from the from the field of moon in themselves, not believing in themselves. So, that can cause the opposition in themselves. Uh only because they don't have faith in themselves, so the next part of it is he says to speak out to your moon. You have to speak out your faith. He says that the moon depends on a person's mouth. So, we must say that we believe and say it out loud. And he brings from Tehillim where he says, "I will make your faithfulness known with my soul." It's from Tehillim. And he says when a person is experiencing a crisis of faith or he's struggling at some point in his moon he says even when he's got doubts in the passing over him, it's very beneficial for the person to say, "I believe." No matter the case, I still believe on it. You know, I'm an emunah. I believe in Hashem. I believe Hashem is going to help me. I believe Hashem is going to I believe Hashem is with me. I believe Hashem exists, right? And the reason why it's so important is because think about it. The emes is is that the whole entire briah was brought in all throughout the mouth. All throughout from uttering the words, right? Not the physical mouth, but Hashem uttering the words. We know that the whole Briah was brought brought about from just the words itself. So, ultimately, we understand that by a person saying things, you can mamash bring things into reality. This is why Rabbeinu says that even when it comes to to to sheker, when it comes to to to heresy, if a person says something that's not because So, don't even don't even mention it. Don't say it out loud. You don't want these words out there because a person can bring about things by the way of of saying these things out. And so, he's saying that on the flip side over here, a person can strengthen himself in the Emunah by just saying I believe. I'm a ma'amin. I believe in Hashem. I believe Hashem is with me. Hashem is with me right now. And and by that, a person can can create and and push himself and pull out his Emunah. So, simply giving expression to your mouth in the words in itself is an active Emunah. You're already acting on the Emunah by by by saying it itself. And this can bring a person, he says, to Emunah Sheleimah. Just mamash. A person constantly speaking words of Emunah. And we know this is how it works because how does a person strengthen himself at any point in his relationship with Hashem, in any in any place he finds himself in terms of his Emunah? He only strengthens himself by constant by repetition of hearing Emunah over and over and over again. Whether it's shiurim, whether it's reading seforim, whether it's, you know, being around people. It's one of the biggest reasons why it's so important to be around tzaddikim because they didn't forget why they're here. When a person goes and they see a person who lives out Emunah in the way that the person lives, it rubs off. So, the whole entire thing of what we're doing right now is we're shifting. We're all shifting the way that we think. We're shifting the way that we look at the world. And the and the and the number one way is by speaking these things out, talking it, hearing it audibly over and over and over again. It says that a lot of great people uh in whatever field that they are uh end up achieving whatever it is also, too. They have this whole idea they came out with all type of books about speaking things into reality and all this other stuff. It's like yeah, manifesting. Yeah, that's what it is. It's a manifesting. It's huh? Law of attraction. Law of attraction. Yeah, whatever. Law of attraction. Law of attraction, right? Law of attraction. Right. You like this you like it. Sitting too close. So, the law of attraction this idea which obviously, you know, it just always sounds better when it's coming from the tzaddikim, you know? It's not like it's not a concept. Uh sometimes thinking that this in and of itself is it and that's the problem usually with most of the uh the self-help End all be all. Yeah, things like that. Huh? It's like it's like it's the end all be all. Right, exactly. problem with them? Huh? What's the problem? The problem with it is is that a lot of times they're not attributing it back to Hashem. Back to the ultimate emes. And then what happens is to the person is they they hear a certain speaker say something or bring this law of attraction whatever and they start to make somewhat of an avodah zarah out of the thing itself. It's not to Hashem. Hashem is Hashem is really doing it. We we have at least have the concept of ein od milvado. Why we saying this? Why is he talking about emunah? Emunah in what? Benno is talking about Hashem. I have emunah in Hashem. I have emunah in myself, but the emunah I have in myself is because I have Hashem. I'm a I'm a I'm a chelek of Hashem. Chelek mimeni. I'm from Hashem. So, the whole everything goes back to Hashem. When somebody else is saying it, and they just, you know, motivational speaker and they're telling you if you keep doing this, I'm telling you, I guaranteed you, hey, they didn't wake up. Person can make an avodah zarah out of it. You understand? So, what happens when when it doesn't work? You know what I'm saying? And then it doesn't work. This time or whatever. You You he doesn't usually say I didn't do it", right? He says the guy ripped me off. I paid for the seminar. So, it could decrease someone's faith? Absolutely. I mean, in in in that case, it's decreasing the person's faith in in the thing. It's It's much worse when the person is a mom and the person professes, at least believes of himself that he believes in Hashem. And then when you hear from these people and they're telling you something and then you get caught You don't even know you're engaging in the avodah zarah. Like you know what I'm saying? Avodah zarah most people have it have it have it mixed up in their head like it's just bowing down to some pesel or you know, even the Gemara brings a person that gets angry and person's about kas, also too, is like avodah zarah. But I think it was brought I heard it one time from my rebbe in shul that the rebbe had brought this up in the shiur and I forget what the makor was. I thought he said it was in the Shulchan Aruch and it may have been in the Shulchan Aruch, I can't remember. But ultimately what he brought out, I don't know the makor of this, but I know for sure that there was a makor cuz my rebbe brought it. He said that avodah zarah is all all foreign worship. So, if it's if it's a zarah to you, if it's foreign to you, it's already avodah zarah. A person who who, you know, you go to see a very impressive and amazing tzaddik whatever and you come back and you start talking like him, walking like him, doing that thing. It's avodah zarah, also. You understand? It's a strange worship. It's not your worship. That's why it's important for each person to have a kesher with Hashem to be able to know what is your way, right? What's your path? What kivun Hashem is taking you on because you don't want to do somebody else's avodah. You want to do your avodah. So, everything that takes a person out of a out of out of service of Hashem or serving Hashem in the way that Hashem created that person to go on their path is called avodah that's it's it's it's avodah zarah. It's strange to the person. So, in this particular case of speaking things into existence or listening to what a lot of these motivational people are saying and whatever, you know, if you hear these things and this is what I practice cuz sometimes it sounds like it's very good things. A person has to remind himself at the end of the day, first off, does it line up to what Hashem is saying inside the Torah as the first thing. If there's if there's no contradiction already, so the next part of it is is that a person has to say still Hashem Elokeinu Hashem Echad. You know, that's still ringing up. You go and get advice from somebody in the business or whatever the case is and it sounds really great except with the with the consultation or whatever the case is. Person still has to always elevate everything back to Hashem because the only thing you know, the only thing force of moving or making things happen is Hashem himself. So, this is a declaration of faith. And better to say this out loud and have to say in the front of the person, too, but you can say it to say to yourself that, you know, with Hashem sells in Hashem. Always keep you know, the the Hashem's name on your lips and not just with but really thinking about it. So, he says, "Likewise over here, a person should be careful never to say anything which implies even this what we're saying, uh the the slightest lack of faith, right?" A person shouldn't shouldn't allow himself to uh come to a place where he starts to say things that are are uh that would diminish his emunah basically like, you know, "Oh my goodness, what are we going to do? How's this going to happen? What's what's going to be now?" You know, these type of things. We're we're used to saying it. It just rolls out of the mouth. You understand what I'm saying? But the whole inyan there that is all pogam in emunah. You mean how when when is it pogam in emunah? It's You don't even don't let the words come out of your mouth. So, he says, "Even if you're a believer in your heart and you believe in Hashem in your heart," he says, "never express disbelief even as a joke," he says. "Not even if you're merely quoting someone else to ridicule their opinion. Don't even state the other guy's opinion. Come on. Isn't that crazy? But so if someone is feeling like they shouldn't does that mean they shouldn't feel like a lack of faith in God? Shouldn't shouldn't they speak that out and what do they do? Is this What do you mean? Like if someone is feeling like they lack the God I feel like maybe I'm listening to him. Words of of MS you when you're talking to a sham that's that's totally Yeah, what I think he's talking about specifically here what he's talking about is here when a person is um when a person is out to your your monks even if even if you're alone you're coming to a place of real real you know lack of a moon and like I think we talked this out before when a person is being vulnerable with a sham and you're saying things over to sham it's very good to be detailed with a sham and to talk to sham about all those things because that's how we fix those things right? So all the and the and the part of of of a person's heat would it do and which is just also the the the chuba a person has to understand what is what is chuba. The chuba is returning a sham back to a place where you left them out. Right? So what's the whole Indian of a hate of a person making a favor? That is a as a time and place I did something sham I forgot you right? I left a sham out of the place where sham wasn't there so I disconnected myself so to speak from a sham and and did whatever I did and then you know he he went on about his life. So what is he doing? He's returning what is the chuba? The chuba is I'm returning a sham back to the place all right? This is how all of a sudden if a person he makes chuba can become a scuse for him because now a sham was there. When when it was just you and it was an avera it was the absence of a sham. Now when a person makes chuba he brings a sham back to the situation he brings a sham back to the place. So when a person is speaking and talking to a sham in in his but it do or in his but it do whatever you knew he's right? So when a person is talking to a sham a person has to be vulnerable. You have to speak out words of vulnerability. If you're suffering from, you know, uh a begoman emunah, you you should tell Hashem, "Hashem, my faith is lacking. I'm not I'm not holding where where I should be." All right? That's a different thing than, you know, being out and just saying, "Oh my god, what are we going to do?" You know what I'm saying? Like, you know, I'm just using that as an example, but that's one of the the the most common things people do. It's like, "You know, what's going to be?" You know? Hashem's going to be Where am I going to go next month? Where am I going to go next month? Where am I going to go next month? Who's going to take me? I do with all this money that I have? Who's going to marry my daughter? Who's going to do this? A person needs to They should live with Hashem by speaking speaking words of with Hashem all the time and keeping Hashem on their lips. He says to do this, uh Rabbenu says to do the opposite of that is He said it's to is very very wrong. He said that it can be easily damaging to the person's emunah. Even to joke. He says even as a joke it is forbidden to say anything which implies a disrespect to Hashem. You shouldn't even disrespect Hashem joking. It's really it's my draga, but you know, a lot of these things that that Rabbenu is bringing, these things are are common sense once a person is living with Hashem. You understand what I'm saying? Rabbenu He He He's He's bringing none of that are hard for us because we live in a world where, you know, we we constantly have excluded Hashem out of our lives, all of us to some degree. You know, I heard one time that, you know, since Hashem kicked us out of the garden, we we've been creating gardens keeping Hashem out of ours, all right? So, it's it's a it's it's a very very important thing that a person makes a conscious decision to start to in their mind to think that I'm living with Hashem. That's really what the emunah is. That Hashem is mamash here with me. I'm not There's no place I've been that Hashem wasn't also in that place, all right? So, I'm living with Hashem, and so my deeb and my words, everything all actions I I was telling a friend over, and maybe I mentioned to you guys also, too. So, since 2008, I haven't said a single swear word, right? My words have not said I haven't said a single swear word since the year 2008, right? And I don't come from a place where swear words are If you listen to my my first album, Shmiras Halashon, I don't know if I said any words that were not swear words. You will not find it. I won't let you find it. I hope you don't find it. So, so, and I'm not saying that to put myself on a pedestal. I often go back and say, "How How did that happen? What What happened?" The truth was the impact of of of the the kibbud Hashem and all the speaking that he that he put to do, the fasting, all the prayer that we had just to find the emes. I was only looking for the emes. The encounter with the sham was so impactful that it left a lasting effect, right? It's a few other things I wish it would have worked out in, but whatever the case is, that was one for sure. That was one of the first things that went, right? Of me understanding that. Now, are there you know, are there are there worse things that a person wish that, you know, like, okay, Hashem, I wish you could press the button easily on this one, you understand what I'm saying? Like machshavos. Like a person's machshavos. It's a much harder avodah for a person to to work out the way that they think, the way, you know, not even if you go to tum'ah d'k'desha, you know what I'm saying? The first time Moving to Eretz Yisrael and trying to understand and contextualize that I'm here at a certain place, and this guy keeps walking over me, he's bumping me, he's stumping me, he's cutting me in line, and all that to mean for me, coming from the hood, want to box. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's like a completely different mindset. I had to kind of reshape the whole entire way I think. For me, that means you want to fight. You know what I'm saying? Over here, it just means nothing. It doesn't mean nothing. So, so look at you like, "Why are you upset?" It's like, "You stepped on my shoe. You bumped me in my shoe." And they're like, "You understand?" Mindset is everything that a person takes a while for them to shift his his way of thinking. But all that does is only way that a person is going to be able to do this is they're living with the shame. Mama should make the shame a part of about her life. So they cry. So the word kasha, which is which is a difficulty in the Gamara, everybody it's the kasha the kasha the kishya kashya was a difficulty whatever. I I used to always think that whenever somebody was saying um you know, depending on how a person says it the kasha kasha they would call me kushi, you know, the kushi the kushi the kasha kasha or whatever. It's like a kasha it's a kasha. Kushi, okay. So difficult So difficulty is a difficulty is, right, even if you're saying all this uh what the question is what's the kasha whatever. He said consists of the initial letters of the words of Shema, he said, "You k v k, right?" This is called the ikra. This is the hear Shema Shema Shema my voice is coming from Tehillim and 27 the 27th chapter of Tehillim by the way I really am saying kaf zayin. If you can make it a part of your life, I tried to read this one like as much as possible. But if a person wants to grow in their moon and be talking to Hashem read this song over and over again kaf zayin kaf zayin kaf zayin lamed zayin also lamed zayin also. So he says, "When you cry out in your heart this in itself he says is an aspect of emunah. You may have many doubts and questions, but when you cry in your heart it shows that you still have a spark of emunah. A person at least is crying. And get get us to a place that at least we're sensitive enough to know even if a person is struggling at least you still want to be sensitive enough to to know, "Hashem, I'm not really where I want to be, you know?" So the Ben Ish Hai talks about the you know, the hest hest de panim or he talks about a star ship or talk a star that the person is in a mama ship in a in a deep deep sleep so to speak spiritually or a person at that point where he's at that low place, he forgets that he was searching for a ship. He forgets what his whole entire mission or everything was at least in a star one at least the person still has some type of recollection or some type of recognition recognition that I'm supposed to be serving a ship. I'm messing up or whatever. But if a person is able to scream out and I and I've done this before too in the mama ship in the time of mama kindness like a ship where are you? It's not supposed to be like this. It's just mama ship the relationship is not supposed to be like this a ship. You mama ship scream out to a ship and that little spark of of a moon of a ship just giving you a little bit of a kiss a little bit of a hair kiss that let a ship let a let a person know that I'm still here. I'm still here with you. So he's saying that even this little part this could bring a person to a moon of a true moon. I'm saying the same true moon here but I would like to see actually let me see where he's taking this from. He doesn't bring it over here. See if I turn around. If see if I turn around or whatever. Let's see if it says I'm on a stream. I have a feeling that it probably says I'm on a stream. But just from this cry that a person cries out to a ship so he says without this this spark this uh the spark that a person has you wouldn't cry out at all. And if you didn't have something there some little light shining on a person he would never even cry out to a ship. And so he says understand this and it's another thing when many brings later also too but when a person is diving and fighting to dive in with his love of some diving crying out to a ship and a person goes with the full coal and he really sent to a ship it says so much to restore a person's emunah, bring him to true faith. You ain't going to understand. It gets the uh It removes so many different clipas that are stopping, trying to block the person to feel us. They're stopping from being able to connect with his tefillin. I just want to see if this is emunah shleimah. Cuz if so, I'm going to start screaming every every day now. I'm going to scream. Not just at Not just at my kids. They had you down, man. I'm telling you. All the way here, I was still hearing what you were saying. I got some of your jokes. We're going to work on your material. We're going to work on some of your material. Oh, my. That's it. That's it. I I assumed you were freestyling. Wait. Wait. Wait. Actually, I've been mad. I have to stop. I'll sponsor I'll sponsor it. You'll sponsor I'm never I'm never allowed back in the in the in the black hole. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. It don't look at the party people. It says up here cuz it says I can't believe though. But I'll tell you who they going to do though. He's a man. I thought I thought he Person to act I can't believe though. Yesh boni tzus. Came to shalom. It's like I'm in the part over here that I was looking for though. It's not bringing it out. The bait him. One sec. Huh? This is what got my yiddishe heart talking. Zoch le emunah. Who be getting And he doesn't bring him on a shlama, but he says brings over here the true money. Whatever true money is. What's the difference between true money and money shlama? That's That's what we were trying to find out right now. The The verdict is still out. So next time I see the rabbinate to ask him. I translate it as money. Doesn't say money shlama. The true money. Whatever it is. Whatever true money is you can get it. I'm I'm assuming it's a it's a drop less than true money shlama. But that's by screaming out to God? By screaming out to him. Screaming or crying specifically? Crying out. Crying out specifically. Specifically crying. But he said crying out. Crying out, screaming out, or crying. Crying specifically? Yeah. Yeah. We all have what to cry to him about. The emphasis is we don't know how much it's purifying for for for a person's neshama for a person to cry. So like mama she cleans so much for a person. Especially a person is crying over a virus. Crying over the hisaron between him and him means means so much to him. Even if a person doesn't feel it is it you don't know how how much you cleansed, you know? How many How many things you were able to fix just with honest tears to him about it. The main thing is I mean I think it's very early on that he stopped and after she talked about the importance of crying. He said a person shouldn't shouldn't make himself cry. You shouldn't go out of your way to force yourself to cry that you forget to talk to him, you know, with the with the with the with the real words and with honesty. But a person if he can cry and you got to that place of crying it's so precious to him. And a person should know anytime he's crying before him, him is is bringing him him in. Him is momish bringing him in. So this cry can also You'll see this also too when you guys start to have kids also, you know? Kids crying. Honest cry. Not the kid that's crying cuz they you know, the other kid punched him or whatever the case is, but a true cry, you know, nothing worse than, you know, I have to think about this, you know, a few times my kids been sick over the years and yet one of the hospitals or something, none of us should know about this And and uh and you see that your kid like suffering and you can't do anything about it. There's no greater pain than looking at your child like crying or suffering or going through something and you can't do anything about it. Now, the the interesting part if a person is able to take that moment and think about their pain, what it means to Hashem, but he can actually do something about it. You understand? Uh Hashem's not limited. So, when he does it, how does it how does it not make people feel like God uh doesn't listen to them and also like build resentment towards Hashem? What do you mean? In terms of uh if they know so much that he could take away their pain and he's not answering their prayers or let's say like they've been in a bad long time and they're still suffering with the same thing for many years, then how is it that they could be much farther from Hashem? It's like you know, helping me, you know? It does happen sometimes like that for people. And sometimes they start to feel that they're more uh distant distant they they grow more distant from Hashem because they don't feel like Hashem answered their prayers. So, the truth is this, is that you know, I was just having this discussion somewhere else that what what we have to understand is that most of the time and in most cases when a person has suffering going on in their life and they start to you know, people start to blame Hashem, like Hashem shouldn't do this or whatever the case is, whether it's before the davening, after the davening, after everything else, a person has to understand that suffering comes into the world not because of too much Hashem. They think Hashem is too involved in their life. That's why I got sick. That was a it's a hisaron of Hashem that created, you understand? The hisaron of Hashem creates suffering in the world. That's what happens. That's how we and and and we know this from Hashem telling us, you know, especially when it comes to things like this. And it's it's a very tough because it things are so nuanced and we're so far away from that place where Hashem wants us actually to be and we're in a very very deep galus. But Hashem tells us that, you know, that that you know, if you if you if you follow my program, you know, everything I brought up on you Mitzrayim, I wouldn't bring up on you. Right? Hashem is very like clear about these things. I need Hashem refa'enu. Hashem is telling us that there's a there's a certain program in a in a way. Not to say that each person that gets sick that they weren't following the program of Hashem, no. The truth is is most likely we all have work to do. We all have work to do. And nobody knows and you can't say why a person's suffering. But the but the suffering itself is caused from a chissaron of Hashem and not too much Hashem. It's not because Hashem was is is too involved in your life. There's too much hashgacha going on here, you know. Hashem needs to back off some. Hashem, how could you do this to me? This is you know, you like Hashem's you're messing stuff up. You understand? Something's going on. So So this is all all this comes from in itself is is what I'm trying to say to you. It's is a phenomenon of emunah. It's that emunah is not shleimah. When a person has emunah shleimah, which is exactly why I wanted to bring this actually cuz you you brought up you wanted to talk about simcha over here. So he he brings first over here that what we already know from the Gemara, right? So when a person has something that's good for the person, they need to give a give a bracha to Hashem. They need to bless Hashem. He also brings over here so so brought in the Shulchan Aruch that also to when things are not good, also to we also make a bracha to Hashem. He also says "Hatov v'hameitiv." Hashem is good. Hashem is good and Hashem will do good. Hashem is always good. But he brings over here a very very very important point and he talks about the people that are really all in my draggers and how they look at it. But he brings over here We're bringing on the other side and they also to on the things that don't go person that is is also he brings over here. This is the tool Hold on one second. Make sure I'm in the right place. Yes, that means we should have right here. But that's okay. But that's a person has when I make sure I'm at the right place and they're also he says also on the road person needs to But the old days he says over here to over time and them that person also to as a simple for them even in the time of sorrow even when they're going through something why because they get the midst to be my man of ice. Who I mention a sham rocks brings down a sham is bringing this era and for them they look at it. This is another way for me to engage in a vote of a sham. You understand? So this is bringing them to true simple for that they have simple even in the suffering themselves itself because this is the way she this is my dragger when I am in this my dragger but But the reality is is that once I know it once I already know that I know how the program is supposed to be. So at any point or any moment that I'm feeling a I'm upset with the sham because things are not going my way or he's not answering me fast enough or things are not going the way that that I want to do it. You know, I it's not working out the way that I that I want person has to think back into remember at least I'm not in that my dragger. There's many my draggers I'm not having reached there yet but it doesn't mean it's not in this right. I'm already in the place of the real is is is this is the way that the sham is relating to me right now. Right? And the truth is the most suffering person doesn't realize that the that the the nakuda is is not to get the thing a person's davening about, it's to get the person davening. Right. Hashem wants the kesher from a person. Person suffers a lot of times because Hashem's the pinnacle of of of whatever it is, even if you receive a yeshua from what you're davening about. Right? The pinnacle of what Hashem's trying to get the person to in the relationship is the davening. Is the crying out to him. That's the main nakuda. Why? Because that's the ultimate kesher. No, it's not the Why? The guy gets thrown pain and suffering just so they could cry out to him? Well, if if you think of your pain and suffering, would you cry out to him? No. Okay. If you're saying that my kids. I love my kids, right? So, I want to do everything I can to prompt and push them in every single way, right? And and let's let's really think about it. There there are scary things in life, so not every single thing, right? But if we think about most of the tzaros and different things that we've been through in life, right? When a person looks back on it and you could say, "Wow, Hashem, Hashem, you brought me from a long way." But there's a lot of things we could look back and laugh at and be like, "Wow, Hashem, you know, all this is, you know, back then, you know." So, Hashem, he's laughing already before it happens. You think that it's some big tzara or some major thing going on by you. Hashem knows that it's something small, but for you, you think it's a mountain, it's a huge thing or whatever, and Hashem's going to bring you to that place of where you cry out to Hashem, and when you think of Hashem, "Ah, it was all for that. It was all for that." The yeshua is not predicated on it. Hashem is probably going to save the person anyway. It's a lot of times if a person you know, think about it. I I I saw one time, I repeat this a lot. I I can't remember who it was. I think it was Steve Harvey, one of these guys that you know, non-Jewish uh motivational speaker guys or whatever. And he said it wasn't him. It wasn't him. It's definitely a black guy. I'm not saying Tony Robbins. He got to identify as black. I don't know I don't know who his older but Steve Yeah, it's probably Steve Harvey or something. Joseph McClendon the you know, you know, you know, you know, you Right? So, ultimately, most of the suffering, all these things they're going to they're going through, whatever, if a person really sees it he sees it, this is all smoke. It's not real. Hashem, you just want me to cry out to you. You just want me to talk to you. Okay, Hashem, I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. You know? Hashem, we should do this more often. We should be doing this more often. Huh? Because Hashem created the whole entire briah for his covered, right? So, the whole entire Indian is I've always looked at it this way and and and I think we all can understand that if Hashem is full of this this amazing ahava, right? So, Hashem tells us to command us in the Shema, we have to love him, right? Like we have to. Hashem is commanding us to love him, right? But that's only after what revealed first ahava shalem, Hashem loves us. So, only after we realize that Hashem loves us do we do we, you know, are we then commanded to love Hashem back, right? Because Hashem is full of love and him creating the whole entire briah, Hashem, you know, is is his his desire is to to send out, to spread that love, to cast that love, whatever. And it's a natural it's a natural thing. Like Rebbe Nachman said, he says that if a person knew just a little bit of how much Hashem loved them, they'd drop the whole world and run after Hashem. It would be so powerful that it would alter a person's whole entire life that if they knew, he said, just even a little bit. We think we know Hashem loves us. Just because we heard heard it and so and so. We don't know to the degree of how much Hashem loves us. Because Rebbe Nachman says it would alter our whole entire path in life. We'd just we'd stop, drop everything, and run after Hashem with everything we have, right? If we knew a little bit. So, therefore, Hashem's desire is for us, because Hashem knows what's good for us, is to also replicate that love and give it back to him. Which which is brought about by the kesher, by the connection, communication. Where there's no communication, there's no relationship. Where there's where there's where there's communication, there's a relationship. And then sometimes there's bad communication. And that's what we're talking about. Right. At least there's People are saying, "Why did you do this to me?" And it's it's a valid I know the feeling. We all have been there, right? And it's And it has its place also. Because without being able to get to that place of of crying out, at least first the person realizes one thing, I'm a mom and still I still believe in Hashem, right? I believe he does bad things. So, say I got to work on myself, but I believe in Hashem. That's the first part is. And then And then the second part And the second part of it is that really the emphasis I believe Hashem is good. How do I know that real steady believe Hashem is good? Cuz I'm calling out for him to do good. Mhm. You understand what I'm saying? I'm calling out for him to to give me what I feel is justice. Even though I'm wrong, Hashem is a thousand percent right, right? But I know he's just because I'm still calling out to him in the midst of of of saying, "Hashem, how could you do this?" All right? Why do Why Why Why Why are you so upset with Hashem if you didn't believe he was good? Right? Mhm. It's because you person believes in the moment in the tov of Hashem, he knows that Hashem is absolute good. So, when he's crying at Hashem is a, you know, "Hashem, you're not acting like you're supposed to. You're not acting like the with the seforim are saying, right? To to my own." But as he grows, he hops and he starts to realize that, "Wow, Hashem, you were doing good for me all along." Mhm. He says, "Even if you are not yet attained this, the cry itself is still very beneficial." So, even if you haven't got to that that place where you're able to eliminate everything and you can elevate and strengthen yourself completely in your emunah to all the questions that a person may have had with a sham have disappeared. It says even if you haven't got to that place yet, the cry itself is still very beneficial for a person. So, Rabbeinu next next brings that there are various kinds of emunah that a person has. There's emunah that is only in the heart. But a person may have so much faith that it spreads to all of his limbs. It gets to an inside the whole entire body. All right? And so he says the the the Kabbalistic writings mention that when one is washing his hands to eat bread, one should raise them up towards his head in order to receive holiness. I do this. Lift them not high enough. My wife lifts them up even higher. I said, "You know you got a good wife." She This week made sure my She said my hands weren't high enough. I wasn't getting more bracha, you know, more bracha. So he says, "Your emunah must extend into your hands in order to believe that by raising them towards your head, you receive holiness. To even You understand top that Yeah, okay, they tell me I'm going to receive more kedusha and everything like that. But even a person just lifting up his hands, a person is acting out that simple faith in order for him to do it, right? Because nobody would ever do something stum, right? Somebody isn't going to tell you just to do something just to do it. You wouldn't do it. You'd have to believe in the reason why you're doing it in order for you to So he's saying person even that's commendable. He says, "But without emunah, it is a meaningless gesture." Person just lift up his hands. Just some I don't have emunah. Whatever, we do this, you know, this is something that we do in my house, all right? So we do it. So he says, "All your all your all your mitzvot uh your mitzvot are emunah." This is from the song. So he says, "If you're strong in your emunah, you will eventually come to understand what you believe in. Mhm. It's a big nakuda. Big nakuda. A lot of people always asking, "Oh, why is this? Why is it that? Why is it that?" And I I just I never could understand why they're all why is this? Why is that? Why is this? I'm not picking on you, by the way. Why is this? Why is this? Why is that? I don't know. We just so happen to have this No, I'm offended either way. We just had this conversation. I just want to let you know I wasn't down, you were up when we were having your confessions, you know. I thought I had you too easy. Too easy to pick on. This is good. Yeah, that makes that makes you easy to love. Yeah, thank you. She's easy to love. It's a little hard for me. It's a little hard for me. I haven't achieved my goal yet. You haven't achieved your goal yet. I yeah. True religion is saying believing leads to understanding. Huh? True religion is saying believing Believing leads to the understanding. opposite of what you expect. Opposite of what I said. Right. But by But by and large, we are the we are the nation of na'aseh venishma. Right? So, that's that's a DNA thing. that. That's the whole in you. That's in the DNA. It's na'aseh venishma. First we do and then then we and then afterwards we believe. Everybody's going to be busy with questions. But the truth is is that the munah itself so many different times I I I've been at people's house and then there's the one kid in the family struggling. Why are we doing this? Why are you doing that? Why are you doing that? And then the parents aren't giving an answer. Most of the time they don't know the answer. They've also just been doing it for a very long time or whatever. And I didn't know the answer. But eventually uh the shabbos'em kept happening and then you know, life went on as normal. And I came across all the answers of why we did all the things. But I didn't care. Uh the truth is is that a person has to be you have to have to be honest with yourself that once there's a certain level of relationship there between a person and another here I'm saying even on a human being level, you you start to believe. You know which friends in your life you could believe when they tell you a story. You know which friends do you you should check another source, right? Mhm. Every person knows that that I have and it doesn't always mean, you know, I have one friend he used to tell me like this this is you know, back in the day when people used to still before the streaming you still watch movies on the DVDs, you know, the CDs with this. So, he said to me he says, "Listen, my friends are my friends. I have friends who I can lend stuff to. I have friends who I don't lend stuff to." I don't I don't have any less love or anything like that. I just I love you up until here, right? Yeah, there's a boundary of our love is that I don't lend things to you. You understand? Cuz it never comes back. Right. Right? So, you know, based on the relationship how how it is It's not time. Hesbon Hanefesh. You like that? Save it let's save it for Hesbon Hanefesh. So, the stronger the person is in their emunah, the more more they're going to understand that the more more that they believe in Hashem the more more they're going to understand what it is that Hashem wants them to do. It's the same thing with a person's taqwa. Rebbe says a person won't leave the world without knowing why Hashem put him here. If they're engaged in hisbodedus every day, why? I'm spending time with Hashem every day. I'm a real moment. Hashem is now going to communicate things to me. Right? So, I I always say, you know, for all of us who are busy cuz I don't think the news has ever been more juicier than what it is. But Rebbe Nachman Rebbeinu always was looking at the news. What Rebbe Nachman brings Rebbeinu always wanted the news. He didn't have a newspaper, but people he was always asking people for the news. He took it and turned it into Torah. We take it and turn it into arguments. It's different things. But the news is the news, right? But can you imagine that that that Rebbe Nachman like Rebbe Nachman he needed the news? I was like Rebbe Nachman didn't need the news. He knew what was going on and whether it was from hearing or whatever, but there's such a madreiga where Hashem himself won't let the person go without knowing. Why? We see with Rebbe Nachman Rebbeinu. Rebbe Nachman Rebbeinu he said, "Can I hold it back from you, you know? Can I hold it back?" So, the Nachman said from the more and more person is engrossed in the relationship with the sham and they built their moon to such a place and they and they and they and they and it's not a, you know, drive-by meeting with the sham, but they actually, you know what I'm saying, they take up a residency with the sham, so to speak, like David and Miller. You know, every day I'm here, sham. I sham I'm every day I'm I'm in this place. I may I've taken up a residency by a sham. When a person's over there, then the secrets are opened up to the person. This is why we were made to bring that if a person wants to taste the organos and wants the secrets, he needs to engage in a lot of his holiness. For that, from then a sham starts to reveal secrets to the person and to the individual, thus showing him why he's here. What's his top kid? Why he's here in this world. So, once a person has built up himself to so much to such a degree in their moon with the sham, then you're going to start to understand things. At the outset, he said, "You have no option but to have a moon." But you cannot understand the matter. But through a moon, you will come to understand the matter. Because there's a certain I think it's uh I don't know what they're bringing. This is the equal hook man for sure like what they might want. I can't remember what you're talking about. And so it brings it to equal hook man is a moon. Which is really it. That's real hook man. Is a moon. Like you know what I'm saying, to be able to like to be able to hop and understand something is a matter of, you know, muscle memory and and tissues really a heat Tony type of thing. It's not really the to the essence to the inner of a person. But the hook man has to be right in the moon. What do you I thought that that is any that like with the spheres. Yeah. That that like each sphere like the sphere above one Right. on the inside. Connected on the inside. So, the inside of hook and moon is connected which is a moon. It is a moon. It is a cat. It is a moon. 1,000% right. 1000% right. So, the this is the this is the main focus of a person that has faith. I mean, you see it in the simpleton and the sophisticated. A guy was a mama's brainiac, you know everything, all the languages, all the whatever. The simple the guy can't make a shoe. You understand? Can't make a shoe. Normal shoe. You understand? And look how elevated he he he becomes because of because of his eventually you get to greet the king in your own way. But the person who allows himself to be blocked You're not wrong. The love is real. The love is felt in this place. By some. If he didn't love you, he wouldn't say anything. Yeah, I know. If he didn't love you, he would not say it. It would never come out. Yeah, but if he hated it. The opposite of love is indifference. So, he says there will then be new more exalted levels that will still be hidden from you and beyond your ability to understand. And here again, you will have to make the effort over here. Here again, you have to make the effort to have a moon. And so, it's going to go darker than darker. Person is going to give to one place to another place to another place until he he he uncovers all those hidden things that are hidden from the person. And you must always start with the faith regarding the levels that are yet hidden from you. But eventually, you'll understand them as well. It's an ongoing process and your moon must be so strong that it spreads to every one of your limbs. This moon will bring you to true hope. The baby brings it. I already had that time. You said you already had that. I didn't already have that. I didn't know that it was going to be there. Oh, wow. That's cool. True, but I'm going to bring you to true call from so that's it. Yes. I'm going to show you this is where it all comes from. Once I believe in a sham it's going to bring me to such a such a high place. Mama said you're going to be able to understand. And you And you know what happens? I've seen so many different times that many different to kufas. The The The The emesis Everything at that point becomes a agent to to to illuminate what the emesis for the person. Because he's growing, you know, there's nothing better than a person taking a path of simplicity of speaking to a sham every day learning this a form of a vein or and living and trying to actually live with Torahs and Mama should live that way. You begin to see the whole entire life is that Torah. That Torah becomes a life for the person. And Mama should start to see so many different things and the more more that a person is is How do you say it in English? Everything becomes a agent. You will hear a random conversation and this Mama should you know it's divine a sham to answer. It's your answer. And and you know it's You know it. The next guy over there was just two guys over here talking or whatever the case is. But for you that was that next next level money you needed to understand something. Whether it was a person You know, this guy showed a personal thing for a person. A sham has infinite ways of speaking and bringing us to that understanding. Rabbeinu wrote on himself in terms of dog is that he didn't know that there was a higher level. He just kept on going up. He just didn't know there was something else up there, you know what I mean? That was a very humble thing to say. But the truth is Rabbeinu he was humble. He already said himself he was humble so you can take his word for it that he didn't have any idea that there was another madriga. Like I was trying to think of like What did Ba'al Shem do the first time he could start hearing people's thoughts like, you know? Like what was that? You What did What type of freak out did you have at that point? You start knowing what the person is thinking over there, you know? There's such people like that in the world today. I know some people who have not because of the maybe they are the who knows? But there are certain people that have who have certain gifts. Some people don't believe in it or whatever the case is, but I've seen some real things. Telepathy and different things like that. There's certain people that have certain gifts like that, but I just me I I'd be freaked out. They'd have to put me in in some room or something. Like you think about it. Like if it's if you just all of a sudden got to such a place you could start hearing what people thinking and their conversations or whatever. You know, I'm I'm assuming that it takes some getting used to, you know, with some of that. It's the best. Right, right. But different levels and levels of that a person can get to. We'll finish with that one. We'll move on. So is that how prayer works? So basically when you pray you start attributing the meaning to your prayers being answered? Like you're more sensitive to what you hear in conversation cuz you might be praying to your answer an answer to your prayer rather than if you didn't pray you would have just not thought much about the conversation. So absolutely you become more more cognizant to become more spiritually aware of the things that are going on around you. And it's not just because of the prayer itself, it's what the prayer is doing to you. So it's taking the lave of stone of heaven and it's cracking away to bring you to a basalt lave, right? To a to a softer heart, right? So then when Hashem is speaking Hashem is speaking to us. Most people are looking for audible. Hashem is speaking to us in the heart. A lot of times Hashem is speaking to a person it's coming from inside. So when the person is going through whatever they're going through and they're trying to elevate themselves in terms of coming closer to Hashem, the the the the test is always going to be is hearing Hashem in in a way that a person I I the proper words is that us clear. There's a There's a I There's a concept called love language, right? So, love language is that each person has a love language. They talk about a lot with kids and parenting. This kid has this type of love language. This is I say the belt works for all of them. That's how I grew up. It's universal. It's universal. It fits all five in one. It's five in one special. You cannot touch your kids today in in 2025. It doesn't work that It's not endorsed. They don't make us the same way they used to. Me, the belt worked all the time. You understand? I'm sorry. We all got the same medicine when I was a kid. This one I got to talk to you very softly and gently. This one I need to be more khazak with and this one. This one you don't say nothing to you just give a look. You know, that each one have the have the love language of how you deal with each and every every every every person. So, taking a shiv as our father as our tati, he knows how to speak to us. He knows how I'm going to speak directly to you and he's not going to to to pick up on what the conversation was, right? But Hashem knows how to get into each and every single one of us. The main thing is is making ourself available. Have softening the heart to where we're ready and become a place where Hashem we can we can take on the Hashem. We can take on the hazraka from Hashem that Hashem wants to guide us. To think that Hashem put us in the world and he wants us to just be makabel everything like all and not to have any type of pressure and not It just It just doesn't even make any sense. We don't read this. We're not It's not what we see. We don't see this from tzadikkim. We don't see this from tzanua. We We don't see this and now everybody has to make an excuse, you know, for after some hester panim has come and and and and the excuse of of uh you know, like you know, when it comes to secular things, everybody wants to be the best at it, right? They want to be Nobody wants to be just a lawyer. They want to be the top guy. Nobody wants to be just the you know, the car salesman, they want to be the to be on the top. Nobody wants to be you know, there's a big difference. I tell you some cultural things that are pretty pretty different. And I can say this now, Trump's back in office, you can say whatever you want. Is that one of the biggest differences is being in the black community at times you know, guys will bring up sports all the time. We'll be talking and then the debate is you know, who LeBron, Michael and all this other stuff like that. And then Kobe whatever. I've been a lot of places like that, right? Where guys are going back and forth and this this, you know, this we grow up like that, you know, arguing about sports and different things. Right, right. So what happens it it changed once it was around you and then I start to hear a lot of these you know, guys going out and talking you know, especially in the more modern places whatever. It went from the players to who owns the stadiums. This one owns that one or that. It's just we never got to that place in our conversation. Never got to that. You understand what I'm saying? It's a mindset automatically where people start thinking about who owns this real estate, who owns that one and this stadium and that. The whole conversation leaves from the players, you understand? It's a mindset go up higher, you know what I'm saying? I was asking I think about the owners. Let's think about the owners. You haven't thought about the owners. Anyway. Right? Different type of conversations you're having over there. But Hashem knows how to speak to every single one of us. He knows the the love language. Hashem knows how to how to bring us that place. You guys are taking us off topic over here. Okay, so I'm winning Hashem. I'm winning Hashem and not in the means. This is what we just talked about, right? Not in the means itself. So many people make the mistake of turning the means he says through which something comes about into the intermediary between themselves and Hashem, right? I'm going to take the means not not Hashem. I'm going to make it This is what we talk about. The voters are already. So, they do believe in a shame, but they also believe in the intermediary, right? Saying that we have no option but to depend on a particular means in order to bring about a certain result. This it can only be if if it happens this way. This in itself is already a person dealing with a avodah zarah. You know, like a you know, we say like um by non by non-Unitarian Christians generally. And not which is the role of a probably most Christians or whatever. So, Rebbi Tovi usually says he says that, you know, they do believe in a shame, they just also have a boyfriend. They also believe in the the guy on the side, right? So, they have an intermediary. Unitarian Christians, they believe in a shame, they also believe that, you know, differently than we do, but but there's a there's a idea where, you know, people can go all the Christians and that people do the same thing. Every person does the same thing. The moment that you start to believe that it can only be the this type of way, a shame's going to bless it only with this. I would like a shame's limited, like a shame can't move around certain certain things. You don't We don't believe in interme- intermediaries, we believe in a shame. So, for example, they put their faith in their business activities. They think that as if they caused their livelihood, placing all of the emphasis on their own endeavors as if God would somehow not be able to provide for their livelihood without them. Like a shame needs your hishtadlus, because if your hishtadlus, which is really a joke anyway. But a person thinks that if a shame if I don't put in the hishtadlus, and I don't give a shame the klee, then it's not going to it's not going to work. The truth is Yosef HaTzaddik was decreed to get out of prison prison. So, therefore, Pharaoh had dreams. It's not Pharaoh had dreams, and this is what caused Yosef HaTzaddik to come out of prison. You understand what I'm saying? Wow. It's the it's the way of thinking. Hashem will bring it about anyway. Hashem was going to already do this, right? So, then Hashem creates a cause to bring it about. We don't believe that this is oh, only because this happened, then this happened. No, that's not the way it works. So, likewise, this is people put all the emphasis in the means to which a cure comes about. They believe in the medicine. The medicine is if without the medicine, Hashem does not have the power to heal. He says, "This is also incorrect." He says, "Hakadosh Baruchu He says, "He is the cause of all causes, and there's absolutely no need for any one particular means." Sibah d'sibot. Famous words of Yeshayahu. So, even while resorting to a given means to try to bring about something, a person must believe only in Hashem and not to put his faith in the means. So, a lot of time where there is decreed Rabbi Yitzchak Breitowitz says from Shamayim that we're not allowed to see Hashem's hand. Right? L'fi hamadregah, some people it's more m'galeh to that person, it's more relevant and clear to that person than it is for another person because of the madregah. However, the way that is decreed is that usually there's some type of appearance of a sibah, which is all really a test, it's a nisayon for a person that if he's going to believe that Hashem actually brought it about, or if he believes that it's because of this thing. This is the constant test that a person has to live with, whether engaging in business, whether engaging in things for cure, or different things like that for for good health, that a person has to believe that Hashem is There is no need for for for this thing. Hashem, I'm going to do it because this is the way you're working with us right now. The person can take his mind off the fact that ultimately Hashem is the one doing it all the time.