Never Tell the Satan No! | Rabbi Daniel Glatstein

We hear so much inspiration about Shemiras Ha’einayim, about the great opportunity of overcoming the challenge of looking at something indecent. But I would like to share with you the most powerful technique to help us overcome a challenge in Shemiras Ha’einayim. Let's explain this first in a psychological way. So you're trying to get your kids to go to bed. You say: Yankel, go to bed now! -No. So how do you react? You're going to scream louder? Go to bed now! Your kid will just refuse louder. That's the way psychology works. The more pressure you put on someone, the more counter-pressure there is. But there's a little trick. It's a psychological trick. The trick is: Yankel, you want to stay up five more minutes? Oh, yeah. Sure, Tatty. Sure, Daddy. Are you going to go to sleep right after? Yeah, of course. And Yankel plays for 5 minutes, and then he goes to sleep. What happened? What happened was you gave in a little bit. You didn't really give in. He's still going to keep his bedtime, just a few minutes later. When you give in a little bit, the counter-pressure softens. That's the way it works in the psychological world. It works the same way in the spiritual world. There's an idea that whenever we wear Tefillin, we have hairs sticking out of the של ראש. The hairs come from an עגל, from a calf. The Sifrei Kabbalah write the Metzudas Dovid, written by the Radbaz, explains that when a Jew puts on Tefillin, he's bringing the Shechinah down upon him. Do you think the Satan is just going to put up with that? Do you think the Satan will actually let a Jew put on Tefillin? So what we need to do is we need to throw the Satan a bone. What we do is we make believe we're giving in to the Satan, so we have the hair of an עגל sticking out of the Tefillin so the Satan thinks we're just reminding Hashem of the חטא העגל. So he says: Sure, go ahead, put on the Tefillin. And then the Satan backs off. Says the Michtav M’Eliyahu: This is an important technique to use whenever we're challenged in any area in Avodas Hashem. The Satan's going to say: Look, look! If you don't look, you're missing out. It's going to be so enjoyable. Nobody will ever know. Never tell the Satan ‘No’! Because if you tell the Satan ‘No’, he's going to say ‘Yes’. And he could say ‘Yes’ a lot louder and a lot stronger than you could say ‘No’. So you have to tell the Satan: Yankel, you want to go to sleep in 5 minutes? And this is how you do it: Really, Satan? It's so geshmak, it's so enjoyable? I have to do it? You're right. I'm going to do it... next time. Next time I walk down the street, I'm going to look. Next time I ride the bus, I'm going to look. Next time I go on my device, I'm going to check it out. But not this time. Oooh, the Satan says, you're giving in a little bit? The Satan backs off. You threw the Satan a bone. Says the Michtav M’Eliyahu: Chances are next time you ride the bus, next time you walk down the street, the Satan won't be there. You've already given him his bribe, you've already given him his Shochad, you've already thrown him the bone. You've overcome him one time, Hashem will give you Siyata Dishmaya the next time he won't even come to the arena. This is the most powerful technique in dealing with the Satan. Never say ‘No’, say ‘Next time’. Next time, he probably won't be there.