Mrs. Raquel Kirszenbaum – Living with Emunah

Great. So, good morning everyone. Shhatva, thank you for being here. Let's go. So, for anyone that's new, I do a little summary from last week. So, you all catch up. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, it's okay. You will catch up somehow. So, we started this whole series talking about amuna. Uh, so on the first class, we spoke about how God needs us. Yes. But we said, what do we say? It's a generated need, which makes it better. God meets us like we need to eat healthy food. Not like we need to eat food because that would mean a dependency on God and a lacking on God, but rather like someone that wants to be healthy, someone that wants to exercise. And therefore the conclusion of that class, which I'm not going to teach it again obviously, was that for God to feel obviously all of this is quote unquote for God to feel fulfilled. Yes. For God to be able to express his godliness and his wants to give, you have to be happy. Because if I am, you know, creating you so that I could be a giver, then the more that you are able to receive from me, the more that I can feel fulfilled. Next class, what do we say? This whole entire world is like a pregnancy. What is a And that's why Oh, it happens. Anyway, so what do we say? You know, like uh what is Rabbi Celic please? He says, "Yay, gravity is working." Huh? >> No, we could clean it afterwards. We could clean it. Come sit. Come sit afterwards, >> you know. No, no, no. Afterwards, we'll clean after class. Come sit. Come sit. Anyway, so what do we say that this world it's like a pregnancy? This is why we say God made me according to his will. What is the ultimate giving? When you get pregnant, you're making a space inside of you so that you can give to someone else. But all of the rules that apply to you don't apply to him because the whole point is I see you. Yes. So we said, I'm not going to teach all of the female male class, but that in Judaism, all of the names of God are masculine. Yes. Because God is always a giver. The feminine name of God, which is Kel Shakai, means the one that said enough. Originally, the word was supposed to be in constant expansion. Yes, you would go to a tree and get cookies. This is my dream. I dream about going to Disney and eating a turkey leg. I don't know. My students told me they tasted it and it doesn't taste so good. But I feel like that's all I want. The turkey legs in Disney. >> I never heard of it. >> My dream for the turkey legs. Have you never gone to Disney and people are eating very big drumsticks? Those are turkey legs. They look so good. I I am gonna ask Hashem like kosher people should just be more skinny. We're missing out big time in life. If you're not halal of Israel, I get it because everything is OUD. But if you're hal is so unfair to not be skinny, but it doesn't matter. Anyways, but uh so what do we say? Don't worry, I have ADHD, but I remember everything I said. So what do we say? The world was supposed to be in constant expansion. Yes. But God said, "If I give everything to you, then what are you going to give to yourself?" Yes. If I give my child a million dollars, then I'm preventing him from he's going to be spoiled. He's going to be messed up. So, this idea was a little hard on everyone, but pretty much I said God's ultimate giving is to withhold from giving. The highest level of tedaka is what? I give you a job. But now, wouldn't every single person like to be supported by their parents? Yes, we do live in a world where many people are supported by their parents, but you're missing out on the satisfaction. So, this is our point for today. We're going to move on from here. The highest level of giving is to stop giving. Beautiful. Now, I don't know if I said this part. It could be I said this prayer but if I said it anyways we're going to repeat it because I'm going to continue with this beautiful. Every day when we say the amid we say we praise Hashem. So we say four words. Yes. Did I say this last time? >> You don't know maybe. Okay fine. Okay fine. We're going to take it from there anyway. So take this as a part of a summary or a new idea for anyone that has no idea. Ah Sophia this my friend my student. Okay. Anyways, what this is so nice are you? I see more young people do it. Not that we don't. We like everyone. We like everyone. Anyways, but I don't know where you guys came out of. But hello. There was no parking on the street. This is why you know, uh, beautiful. So, every day we say as part of Ara God is merciful, Gad strong big gib strong awesome. By the way, there's a halaka that you're not allowed to praise God in your own words. I know we all do this, God, you're the best. I love you. You're so kind. But whatever praise you're going to say to Hashem, it's always going to leave something out. So, you're only able to use the words that the Torah uses. So, these four words are the ones that describe the essence of God. God is big. You know, Melo fills the whole entire world with his essence. God is ke merciful, right? God is nor that one makes sense. Awesome. Fear of God. And then it says that God is strong. What does it means that God is strong? No, I don't think I said this. So, this is great. Yes. What does it means that God is strong? Obviously, it doesn't mean that he lift up, you know, like uh stones or anything. So, what does says who knows? Who is strong? Someone that conquers their inclination. Now I want to make this point. People always think that it means someone that conquers their yet. Don't get offended but conquering your doesn't make you strong. It makes you someone that keeps hala. Okay. Conquering your inclination means that you conquer your automatic mode that you conquer that which is natural to you. If you eat kosher, you just keep kalaka. But if you have a chocolate in front of your face, which I don't like this example because it makes me very weak, and you only eat three little squares of chocolate, that makes you strong. I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but in that Torah, God always test people with qualities that are completely natural to him, even if the source of the quality is positive. like Abraham when he had to send out Ishmael, you know the the reason why he doesn't want to is because he's into kindness. Kindness it's a good thing it's a good thing. But the real question in the Torah, not going to get to this now, but it's a very important concept to know is are you kind because you like being kind or are you kind because God asks you to be kind. You know, I always say in my classes that how do you know it's a if a mitzvah is for God? Would you be willing to break that mitzvah if God would ask you to until you're not willing to break a mitzvah? You never did the mitzvah for God. You know, it was always because it was natural to you and easy for you. She's very modest. What does God says? Go play with a hash. They were not playing ROM, you know, like right. Are you modest because you just like, you know, you feel good when you're covered or are you modest because this is something that you're doing sham? So, how do you know when a midvite is leash sham? Would you break that midwife sham? Just a huge concept, you know? So, you think about it. Yes. I have a family member that's very very sick and she always insist on fasting on all of the fast. I'm like, you're not being holy. You're being very unholy. Very unholy. But fine, let's keep that there. Anyways, so now yes, what does it mean to you conquer that which is your automatic mode that God is always going to test you with the godly character trait that you're inclined to do, you know, even if it sounds so good. We we say this invit every night you know take out the from in front of us and from behind us. So sometimes you look at and you know it's I don't want to go to a sh because I'm so lazy. I have so many things to eat. You know that but sometimes you're like you know it's like a shabbat and you're like oh if I just do this other dish for Shabbat then my table is going to be so nice but then you know you're going to be stressed and yelling at all of your kids. So that's a right from behind. Beautiful. So if I would ask you what is the inclination of God, what would you say? God is a giver. Yes, God gives. But if I always gives, then I am not able to really give you, which is what we're saying, the ultimate gift of giving, which is to give to yourself. And therefore, every day you praise God that even though his will was to continue creating the world, he decided to not do that. so that he could give you the space to be a partner, to be an associate. There was once this Roman person that came to Rabime and he asked him, "What is better, the deeds of God or the deeds of man?" You know, by the way, this is one of these questions that's very tricky because whatever you're going to answer is going to be messed up. If you say that the deeds of God are better, then why are you doing mitzvot? It's like you're pretty much saying that God's creation needs improvement. If you're saying that the deeds of man are better, then are you saying that God is not perfect enough? By the way, this was the argument of Amalecch. Amale used to take the foreskin from the Brit used to throw it up to heaven and they used to be like this to is so stupid like you have a baby that's created by God and on the eighth day you're already saying that you have to finish the creation of Hashem. Anyways, so Rabim went back home went to went somewhere. He came back and he brought in his hand hala and wheat and he said what is better the hala or the wheat? Now obviously you get the point none of it is better because none of them can exist without each other. Yes, Hashem wanted to make you an equal in creation and therefore he left the job unfinished so that you can finish it. You know, when my daughter was like, you know, last week one of you asked me a question which sounds like a little uh you said it sounds very painful that you can just explain all of the pain in the world by saying who was it that asked me this question that ultimate giving is withholding from giving. Obviously, I'm not explaining all of the pain in the world. This is going to take me the whole entire year. But it sounds kind of hard. Oh, so God could give to you, but he doesn't give you. You know, it's like when I teach prayer, I get so annoyed because uh if you ask the regular seminary girl, why do you pray? Almost everyone will tell you because God wants to give it to you, but he wants you to ask him. Do you answer like that also? Almost everyone in the world that I know will give you this answer to prayer. Now that I'm a mother, I'm like, "Okay, I want to get this straight." God could make you happy, but because he wants to have an ego boost, you know, and for you to lift up his self-esteem, he doesn't give to you so that you could recognize him. Does anyone sees how messed up this is? It's like you could make me happy, but you're not going to give it to me unless I realize you have the power. Now, obviously, God is withholding, but it's not because he needs you to recognize him. It's all for your sake. And by the way, when you're giving an answer like that, you're also denoting, I don't know if you say that word in English, but you're implying a deficiency in Hashem. Many times we say Jewish ideas, but we don't realize that half of those Jewish ideas imply deficiencies in God. Yes. Like for example, why do you pray? Because when you pray, God can change his mind. God doesn't change his mind. Whatever God decided for you is perfect as it is. We're not going to answer this yet. Yes, if a person is sick, God could have made them healthy. God decided that they should be sick, that's a perfect state. Not only that, but God doesn't change his mind because changing your mind means you decided, now you decide something else. Yes, it's implying a limitation change. But now, let's go back. God needs you to recognize him. Of course not. God doesn't have ego. God doesn't have self-esteem. God's self-esteem cannot get better or cannot get worse. So when you understand that, you'll understand that God is with with um restraining for your sake. So I want you to really understand this concept because it's very important. So one day I was making a puzzle with one of my daughters as all of you mothers, you know how this goes. You're making a puzzle and you go, "Where does this one goes? Where does this one goes?" And then she gets all happy and then uh there were three pieces left. So there I don't because I want her to finish a whole puzzle. So, uh, my daughter comes, puts the three pieces. It takes her 15 minutes, but whatever. And then she goes, "Ima puzzle, I did this puzzle alone." Now, I'm very proud of cheering your children, but I also have a little bit of ego. So, I didn't say this, but I wanted to be like, you did not do this puzzle. I did all of this puzzle. Okay. Anyways, but now why don't I say that? So the first point I'm pretty sure you all you all know because I want to build my child's self-esteem. I want to make her feel that she can, you know, achieve. Yes. On that we're all great. You know, how do you build great children? You set the mark for success. But then one time I experienced something. This was the greatest dear. I know this is not going to be a very religious source, but listen people, if you know me, I think I don't think I know God is everything. Nothing can exist if God doesn't, you know, allow it to be or bring it on. Anyway, so for all of you people that are going to judge me by not being religious, I'm not a rabbit. I'm just a normal person that likes to enjoy life sometimes. Anyways, so a few years ago, I was in America. So, you know, I told my students, I want to go see a Broadway show. Amazing. We go see this Broadway show. >> A what? >> A Broadway show. Broadway show. Anyways, this was one of the best things I've ever seen in my life. It was a little bit too liberal for me. >> I'm going to tell you. So, you go watch it. But it was very, very good. But listen, I'm from Panama. We don't have any liberalism. You know what I'm saying? Like, none, we're not politically correct. We're not kosher. We're not inclusive. It's not because we're not. It's just because we're inclusive by default. So, we don't have to make a statement of being inclusive anyways. But what is the point? So, uh, this was my favorite movie as a child. For anyone that has ever seen it, it's called Mrs. Dope. Mrs. Dopefire. >> Great. You said it much better than I said it. >> Fire. >> Ded fired. Anyways, so great for movie nights with the kids on Sukkot so that you cannot watch because you've watched it 500 times because that one is religious. Anyway, so Mrs. That fire is with Robin Williams who's one of the best actors that has ever existed. So, uh, we were all sitting in this show and we were thinking like no one can do a job as good as Robin Williams because Robin Williams is just out of this world even though he died from depression after he made everyone laugh. So, I just tells you it's all acting. Anyways, but um oh my god, the main character I went with my student that she studied in Giuliard, which is like a school for acting and I don't know what >> she was like, do you know how hard to do this? He was beyond he would put like the whole entire suit, you know, in there so that you would see it. Anyways, now I want you to before I tell you what happened next to go into a mindset of a performer. Okay, now we all need validation, recognition. You know, it is very Rabbi Jacobson, the best, you know, greatest speaker in the planet or at least the one that has the most amazing audiences. I love him. He says like for years he struggled with how people would clap after he would teach a class, you know, because it's just so hard. Every person wants to feel loved, wanted, and obviously someone that's taking a public stage is very vulnerable and sensitive. But there's a part of us that also wants to be recognized. That's just the way that it goes. It's a very big struggle to be humble and to just be a vessel for God. Now, if you're a performer and you're specific into theater, you for sure have a part that needs big time clapping. These people are emotionally sometimes imbalanced, you know, like they cry and they smile and they're just like Anyway, so I want you to have that in mind. For a performer, the most important part is when people are clapping at the end. If they give you a standing ovation, you made it. So, I'm waiting for a standing ovation after class. No, I'm joking. I'm joking. Anyways, but like and if they don't, it will mess you up. Okay? So, I want you to have this in mind. Anyways, this actor was beyond. I've never seen anyone so good. At the end of the performance, everyone gave him a standing ovation. We were standing for about 10 minutes and impressed and suddenly something crazy happened. This is the greatest lesson. Top five lessons I've ever experienced in life. No joke. Anyways, he pretty much goes like and everyone is thinking like he's doing like a new part of the act and then he goes, "I want you all to know that as of two days ago, this show was not going to happen because one of the main characters, which is the son in the movie, stepped out and you can't do the show without one of the main characters." That was opening night or something like that. But then you know what happened? something incredible happened. This actor, and he points out to the new son in the stage, who only did this role six months ago, decided in the last 24 hours to step in to do the role so that you could all be here tonight. And then he says, "You're all clapping for me, but he's the one that deserves your clapping." I'm like shaking, by the way. Like he goes in front of him and he goes like this. Oh my god. I started crying. I look at my student, I'm like, do you know what he just did? He took out all of his life work and he was me this to someone else. I I I just couldn't believe what my eyes were seeing. And then I told my student, you know what's impressive? If we thought he was big, now that he made himself so small, now he's even bigger. He doesn't even know that, you know. And this was just impressive. And as I was sitting there, I remember like the meaningful minor app had just come out. This was like many years ago. And this was my first ever post on the meaningful people app. And now I don't post there anymore. I don't even know if it exists. But anyways, but uh and I was just like, this just reminds me what Shabbat is about. And I want you to really think about what I'm going to say right now. You know what Shabbat it's about? You know, if you ever go to like a famous speaker class, they always have this line on Shabbat. I think it's a pretty cute line, but not good enough. They always go like, "Shabbat is the day that we disconnect in order to reconnect." Have you ever heard this line? Everyone says this line. I don't know. I feel like sometimes speakers like steal line from each other. Like everyone has a class called your Esther moment. Have you ever noticed this? Every speaker in the planet. Anyways, I also have a class called the Esther moment. The Esther m. Your Esther moment. Yes, based on the line that Morai says to a state if you don't go has you know anyways >> I just want to ask you >> no it was just very entertaining >> I want to say something >> ah for sure for sure It gives purpose just to be expressive. >> 100% 100% >> of yourself. >> No, obviously. No, you're putting your whole entire heart. You're being very sensitive. You're being very vulnerable. Obviously, creators, we spoke about this last time when we spoke about art. You're putting everything. What I meant, maybe I didn't say it so well, is that for sure they're waiting for you to recognize them because they put so much of it in there. But anyone, if you have someone for Shabbat and you cooked a meal, you know, now if you're not such a great cook, you don't care. But if you're one of these cooks that really puts your heart into it, people always go like, "This is not personal." No, no, it is personal to me because I cooked my heart out. If this is what defines your passion and your drive, yes, for sure. I wanted to be recognized. It's very, very personal, you know, like that's but but yes, you're 100% right. But um it was not just entertaining. The acting was amazing. Anyways, I'm not saying anyone should go, but if you already went, make it caution. Okay, this is in TV, but it's great. Okay. Anyways, but what is the point? So, people always say this line on Shabbar. Shabbat is the day that you disconnect in order to connect. Yes. I'm going to bring this line up. I'm going to say the line that I like and then I'm going to explain. Shabbat is the day that you disconnect in order to reconnect. and you realize that there's a creator that doesn't need you at all, but makes you feel that you're totally a necessity. I don't know if you've ever thought about this. You know how you always think like the world runs around you? You know, everything it's about you. That's just how we all are. Yes. All of Shabbat, all of the days of the week, you're creating and you think, especially if you're a woman, that if you don't get something done, things are not going to get done. You ever saw when you went somewhere away and you left your husband little Ziploc bags with all of the clothing for your kids cuz God forbid he's going to mess it up. He's not. Maybe they're going to be, you know, like not matching, but they're still going to be fine. Let the father be the father. But you know what I'm saying? Everyone thinks that the world runs around them. Now, what happens on Shabbat? Suddenly on Shabbat, you realize, wow, God doesn't need me, but he makes me feel that I'm needed. That's step number one. When I am telling my daughter where does this piece goes, I'm not only building her self-esteem, I am making her know that she's capable. By the way, when my daughter is going to grow and she's going to realize mommy didn't needed her at all to do the puzzle. Tell me if I'm wrong, she's going to love me that much more. But I'm going to take it to a next level. You know, I live in Hanov and there's like a bunch of like bala seminaries. Um, so they have this like hessa program which is very hard because you never know if the girls are going to come. I don't know if anyone here has hea girls and then they come and then they're sick but then you ask them to take your kids away but then it's cold. So at the end of the day you're doing a lot of hes for them. Now I'm a very like uh you know like I'm like I told you on my first class I'm like speedy Gonzalez if you see me cooking okay you go crazy. You know I I have mental issues. I don't know if you understand how talk how quickly I talk. This is how I do everything which is not such a great thing. I know all of you are going to think you're so efficient. You know one of my classes I always say your greatest greatness it's always your greatest weakness. You know because I am so efficient my tolerance level is um not so high. My therapist always says that I hold people to levels that are not human because if I have 45 degree fever, I will go work because I have mental issues. You understand? Anyways, mental issues. But um so if you see me cooking for Shabbat, wow. Like literally with my first baby, I gave birth a few weeks before Rosha Shana. A week after Rosha Shana, a week before Rosha Shana, I made 25 dishes in one day after I gave birth to my baby. Mental issues. Mental mental. Okay. Anyways, don't be like me. It's not healthy. Okay. I actually have twins. I made my baby boys. Brit me. When I say I made it, I cater. I cleaned. I messed up. Messed up in the head. I didn't realize that. You don't really sleep with twins. But look, I've recovered. We're doing well. Anyways, so um I used to have Hessa girls and then I used to lose uh patients cuz by the time they peel one potato I pee like 25, you know. Now nowadays I have daughters and they're daughters daughters not like daughters like this but they want to help in the kitchen. So it's very hard for me because um if you you have kids and they help in the kitchen from one side you want to let them be you see you're all naughty. from one side you want to let them all be sufficient and learn so one day they make the cakes and you don't have to make them but till they do that or husbands husbands are worse than kids they leave such a mess such a I die you know like when I make ceviche which if you don't know what ceviche is you're missing out big time in life this is like raw fish with a lot of lemon juice my daughter does all of the lemons because it takes a long time but she does it while I'm in the gym then I come back she knows to clean to clean the house. But you know what I'm saying? Like all of the eggs are everywhere. All of the fish are everywhere. Anything else? Now, let me ask you because this is really where God comes in and God withholding for you to receive comes in because this is really huge. Isn't it Isn't it better for me if I do all of the household on my own? Yes or no? For me, it's much better. my time, my pace, my cleaniness, my everything. The cake is going to turn out good. I don't know if she's going to add baking powder or baking soda or salt, you know, like there's so many things that could go wrong. Now, I much rather do it myself. By the way, even I'm a human being. I don't even do things so well, but I think I'm a pretty good cook. Now, if God is so perfect, do you think he rather does it himself? Yes. He's like much better than Mary Poppins. In five seconds, the whole entire house is clean. Everything is gone. I want you to understand this. When God is letting you do something, God is really withholding because he's watching you making a mess and he's like, "Oh, this is so horrible. I just want to clean up the mess." Not only that, you're delaying him. You're bringing all of these new obstacles because when my daughter is going to make cake, not only am I going to be delayed, it could be that now I am going to have extra work. You all know what I'm talking about. a lot of extra work. But why am I doing this for her? That's what we mean. That the ultimate level of God in giving is withholding from giving. Really, if it was up to God, he rather does it himself. But then you're never going to get to be godly. You're never going to get to be a giver. You're never going to get to all of these things. So now God is suffering to give you the opportunity. Obviously, all of these things are quote unquote. God doesn't need you to do anything. And when you understand that, it like it literally blows blows my mind when I think about this. I just feel so much love towards Hashem. And when my daughter is going to grow up and she's going to see that imma was amazing at puzzles, you know, and not only did I let you do the puzzle, I let you take the credit. You know, it's huge. On Shabbat, you stop to realize God doesn't need you at all. Not only does he not need you, the world is much better without you doing anything. Did you ever notice that on Shabbat, you don't dam for sickness, you don't dam for there are people that don't even say the in because all of the are we're lacking, we're lacking, we're lacking. Yes. Because the whole entire point is if the world would only be run run by God, there would be no lacking shakab perfect world and God steps away during the whole entire week and he makes you feel like you did it. By the way, that's the that's the Broadway show. You know what you can do on Shabbar? on Shabbat, you can step out and say, "Wow, God, you really don't need me at all, but you always always makes me feel so wanted." And that will bring you into ultimate level of love of Hashem and understanding of Hashem. And not only that, then you will say like, "I'm not really doing a good job, but you still let me try it until I'm successful." And God never ever gets tired of letting you try until he's successful. Yes. I'll take the question. Just one second. Yeah. Yes. >> No. So that's how I started the class. I said there are two types of need. There is a need that imply deficiency. Like if I don't eat, I'm going to die. >> But then there is a need that is created and that need why do I have that need? I created that need because it improves quality of life or happiness or whatever you want. So the way I explained it is you could either you have to eat but you don't have to eat organic paleo air horn from you know LA all of that all of that that you're doing is because it makes you happy and therefore the more organic paleo I don't know if I know what all of these words are then the happier I'm going to be it improves my life that's the way that God needs you. He doesn't need you need you. He chooses to need you. And by the way, when he chooses to meet you, it makes you feel that much more important because if someone that doesn't need me wants me, that makes me a very big deal, you know. But we're not there yet. Yeah. Does that answer the question? Yes. is alone and nobody knows. >> That is true. We did mention that on the first class we said that when >> it go doesn't need you to cook food. >> All of what you're saying is true. First of all, I did say this on the first class that if Gore doesn't have people, then he's president by default, not by choice. And he wants you to choose him. And we said this on the first class. You can see it on on YouTube. But second of all, I do want to say this. God is not alone. Because in order to feel lonely, then you have to have feelings. You know, you ever see like a little kid like my four-year-old, he plays on his own. He doesn't care about anyone in the world. He's always happy, you know, because he feels full with who he is. Feeling lonely comes from that place of I need someone to see me. Yes, God doesn't have that. So again, all of what we're saying is good in our language. In God's language, it's fine for him to be alone. But again, he did created us so that he can give to us because then he's going to be fulfilled. But everything that I'm saying is in our language. You're never going to be able to understand God and his language. The Rambam says the Torah speaks in a language that you can understand. But even then, if God wouldn't have created you, he would have still been fine. Yes, I do want I do want to make this point always. I am trying to bring God concepts into our understanding. But you know, you're you're you're speaking. If I would tell you that choo choo choo of God, you would be like, what's choo choo choo? So I use a language we understand. But obviously that language doesn't apply to God because God is above all of that. But yes, that's a reason why God created. Yes. So is this um this part clear by everyone? Beautiful. So let's go back to Rabime when he you know made the the wheat, the bread, all of this stuff. We are a partner of God in creation. I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but you know it's actually one of the main women's mitzvot also. One of the main's women's mvot is to make hala. Yes. Now I work a lot with young people and all of that young married could tell you when a woman gets married there is this different level of pride when she makes halal. It's like if you cook you're good but if you make halal you're like a balabooa. You know what I'm talking about? It's like the biggest thing. You know if you're on social media there's 50 million people that became famous just because they make hala. And then in the Shabbat next to Pesak, everyone is making their halael is the show, but you know, it's not that pretty anyways, but everyone gets this like huge level of pride for making hala. I find it incredible. Where does this come from? Now, I don't know if you've ever noticed, but the blessing on bread is very different than every other blessing that you say. Yes. What is the blessing for bread? every other blessing. What do you say? All of the blessings are pretty much that you're acknowledging God as the creator instantly. Why? Because the pair that you're eating, it looks exactly that the like the pear that comes out of the tree. Now, I don't know how this works for chocolate because shak it doesn't look exactly, but doesn't matter. It works. Yes, there's no difficulty for me in seeing G in everything that I'm eating and in all of sustenance. Now bread is very different. Let's translate the blessing. What do you say? Blessed are you g that you bring forth the bread from the ground. says that when you make hami you have to use your 10 fingers. Why? Because there are 10 kalahic processes that are involved in making bread. Which by the way the Torah says is huge. If I would ask you what is the most basic of foods? You would have to say bread. Everyone always talks about bread. Bread from one side is the most basic of foods. from the other side is the most complicated food to make halically and physically. You know when you make halal, you never know how it's going to come out and you went to your friend and you took her recipe but yours flopped, you know, like no two halas taste the same. It's like it's all about feelings, you know. And the Torah says from one side, this is a testimony to a greatness of man. Like when you have like the son of the king, his like snacks is caviar. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Beautiful. But now, what is the point? I hold my bread with 10 fingers because it is so hard for me to recognize that this was also coming from God because I involved myself so much in what I did that I forget who the source of this was. There is a very famous priote. I think this is the last Mishna of the last per of priabot. Rabbi Noah Weinberg Ibrahim made this very very famous. It's called his famous book the 48 ways to wisdom. Has anyone ever seen this beautiful? Anyone knows what is way 48? Which by the way in the Torah when you're the last one the first one and the last one are all inclusive. They represent everything together. Anyone knows what is the last one? Way number 48 for wisdom. So the Torah says to say the things in the name of the person that gets it. That says it pretty much to give credit. Says when you give credit to the person, listen very well to the word, you bring redemption to the world to the world. How do we know? Because when Esther said in the name of Morai, it even brings you a source. At the end, it ended up saving the Jewish people. Beautiful. So now what is the number ultimate way of bringing redemption to the world is to give credit when you say something in the name of the the person that says it. Have you ever noticed how hard this is? You know when you have an idea and you want to say it like it is yours. So in Panama whenever we have like a party we have a lot of parties. Syrian people oh my god you have a wedding they have like 25 parties and you always wear a different dress for everything. This is why I don't live in Panama because uh it's too much effort for me. I don't love events. But anyways, so we have these things called showered. I know you all know what a shower is, but in Panama, you have a lot of showers. So now in Panama, things have changed a lot since Corona. Everyone became an entrepreneur. But when I was growing up, you have like this is also like many places in America and in many places. You have like the living room where you sit on and then the living room that it's the museum. You know what I'm talking about. And then you have all of these dishes that you have never used in your life. You're only going to use them for guests, but then you don't whatever. Anyways, you know what I'm talking about. So, uh, when I was younger, people in my generation didn't really cook because if you're Syrian, every week you go to your mom for Shabbat, to your mother-in-law for Shabbat, whatever you want. So, when was your time to show off? When there was a shower. When there was a shower, every friend that's in the shower, she brings a dish and she takes a lot of pride in the dish that she has made. You know, like this is your one time that you cooked and you want everyone to know that you cook it. Beautiful. Anyways, so in Panama, because we're very Americanized, we have this thing called Duncan Hind. You guys like Duncan Hines? Okay. There's nothing better in the world than yellow cake from Duncan Hind. When you bake it and the remainance of the cake stay on the pan, you know what I'm talking about. Ah, and it's all oily but delicious. And then you take it with your finger. This is the best memories of children. Okay. Anyway, so nothing better than Duncan and the white frosting. Listen, you're either a white frosting. Chocolate frosting. White frosting is so much better. I just want to say that as an announcement. >> I only like chocolate. Everything else I like vanilla. It's one of my f most famous classes. Maybe at one point we'll teach it. Only like chocolate. Everything else has to be vanilla. Anyways, or you have to. >> No, no, you buy it separately. You buy it separately. I heard I heard in Israel now they're making it also Pillsbury, but it's not Duncan Hinds. Anyways, I have a sister that she has much less filter than me, even though you might think it's not possible, but um it is possible. Anyway, so one time we we went to this like baby shower and uh suddenly, you know, you have like a me salad buffet, meal buffet, dessert buffet, my favorite. And everyone in Panama eats from that this red buff feather. Still skinny. Fine. This is also one of the questions that I'm gonna have forgot. But anyway, so um she suddenly tries this cake and she says out loud, "Oh my god, yellow cake from Duncan Hinds, my favorite." And automatically you hear on the other side of the room, this lady yells, "It's not yellow cake from Duncan Hines. I made it myself." And my sister goes like, "I know Duncan Hines when I see it. Oh my god, this was the most embarrassing moment for this lady. So the lady goes like, it's not yellow cake. I made it. So then my sister goes, "Maybe you made the frosting, but I'm pretty sure the cake mix is from Duncan Hans." Anyways, to make the story short, this did not go out wet. Okay, I left that baby shower because I was very embarrassed. Anyways, now think about this. Why is it so hard for us? You know what's the funny thing? One time I was teaching this class and I was having guests for Shabbat. I'm a very proud Sparty woman and I'm not saying if you're Ashkenazi you don't have this but Friday women it's all about you make everything on your own. You make kipes like literally I have a book it's called aromomas of Aleppo and you make this fried kipe thing which is the hardest thing to do in the world. You know what I'm talking about? like this tornado and it goes and if the keeper has a little bit of meat outside you can't serve it you know it's a disgrace for the community you know like I don't know maybe you're also like me but I take a lot of pride in everything that I do I've never bought hala I don't everything is homemade if I ever have someone and something didn't come out good by the time I'm making kush I'm already doing disclaimers you know it's like I tell them by the way I was cooking a lot of things so I might have added a lot salt and you know I have to wall up on my disclaimers because people cannot judge that day on my ability. I am a very proud woman. Anyways, so one time I was in Cheaper Cole. Cheaper Cole sells all of these American products. So I saw Fudgy brownies from Duncan Hinds. So I had to get them. That week I was having guests. I made the Fudgy brownies from Duncan Hines. These girls go, "These are the best brownies I ever tasted." You could hear my voice because my pressure went down. And then they go, "Did you make them?" I'm like, "Oh my god, I can't lie. Lying is a horrible thing." Anyways, now to to my defense, I didn't want to say this. I made them better. I put Oreos. I put chocolate frosting. They were much better. But do you want to know what my answer was? This was my answer. They're actually Duncan Hines, but I totally upgraded the recipe. you know, like this was. And then after they left, I'm thinking, "Wow, that was so hard." Even when I'm doing Duncan Hinds, I needed them to recognize that I made them. I needed them to see my effort on it. Yes. You know what's a state of exile? Exile is a state of disorder. I have so many things to say about this, but we're not going to have so much time. So, just a few ideas. We are in exile. Even if you are on Rosha Shana on and you live in Yushalim, you still say Bashana. You know why? Because exile is a state of disorder. It's a state where things are not where they're supposed to be. Is when you don't see God in everything. I'm not going to teach this whole class, but if you ever notice this, I love, you know, like when you do the whole entire 15 steps, you get to uh which one is the last one? Um And what are you doing? You sing. You're like, "This is a cool step." Okay, fine. You're already drunk and tired. And then if you ask, I was ashkenazi for many years. You add so much more songs. Oh my god, there is I don't even know what you're singing. And then there's another one. And then if you're really stark, then you say that's a very long night, you know. Anyways, but compare and contrast you're singing to everything else. You know, it's like you don't need matzah, you don't wash, you don't do anything because what is the whole point? If you did everything right, you get to a place of fulltime amuna where you know, by the way, did you ever sang the song? You know when you sing like the same song a lot of times, then you get bored. It's not with a hada. It's like each term you look and then you were like sh and if you're American, I love the American one. I also sing it because we don't sing enough, you know. Nines are the days of the bridge chop chop. No, that one. Nines are the days of the No, no. Eight are the days of the bridge chop chop. Seven are the days of the week. Six are the days of, you know, it's like so catchy. I sing all these things, but you know, when you're getting to the end, you go like, you feel it so much. Why? Because that's what it means to have a everything that you see think is sourced somewhere else is not. It's all God. It's all God. It's all God. He just makes it look like someone else is doing something. And sometimes it makes it look like you're doing something, but it is not. And that's the whole point of it was always Hashem. Everything it's Hashem. So you get to this level where you really realize everything it's an illusion. Everything is God. What is a state of redemption is when you live in a full and we're going to get to this soon in a full level of acceptance and at peace with everything because you know this is God. This is God. You remember on the first class I said God's oneness. We didn't get to yet. This is God. This is God. They look opposites. It's all God. Everything. It's Hashem. Everything. It doesn't matter who was involved. It doesn't matter who takes the credit. It doesn't matter. Everything is Hashem. The good, the bad, the ugly. Everything. It's just like sometimes you don't see him. Sometimes you see him more. But it's all God. And you get to his level of acceptance. We're going to get to our, you know, in the next few classes. Redemption means you're fully at peace. It's not where you are, it's how you are. And that's why, by the way, if you were gui, you don't feel lonely. You don't feel needs. You don't feel anything. You're just the shva. This is what we call, you know, actually in Hebrew, how do you say exile? Gola. How do you say redemption ga? It's only the alf. It's just the same exact picture, but you're putting g into that picture. Yes. The main mitzvah, not the main mitzvah, one of the main mitzvah for the women is to make halal because what are you doing? Halahal represents that there's so much effort on your part. There's so much going on. so many things that are involved, you know, like I constantly find myself thinking about this war and I'm like I don't think this is ever going to stop. Like once Iran knows he can shoot us, he can shoot us whenever they want. You know what I'm saying? Like anyone else, you know, knows what I'm saying? Like you just feel like every every time there's going to be something else. But then you stop and you realize, no, no, no, no, no. Hashem brings forth. It's all God. So I want to finish this class with a very important line, which is, you know, what do you have to realize? Hashem is the Duncan Hines to your cookies. Do you understand? Hashem is the Duncan Hines to your cookies. And when you understand that, wow, Hashem lets me take everything when I'm making those. He gives me everything. And then he lets me go into a table and say, "God, look at the cookies that I made. Look at the things that I'm doing." And in a way, God is pushing himself away because God is taking backstage. God is not taking center stage. You're taking center stage. But that's exactly what love is about. And again, if you understand everything that I'm telling you, we're going to continue. Then you understand why God puts you into all of these pain and all these challenges and all of these things because all of them are going to allow you to have a much bigger recognition of your greatness. Validated whatever you want. Beautiful.