Mishmar Parshas Acharei Mos Kedoshin with Rabbi Daniel Staum

Okay, thank you again for giving me this opportunity. The shabasim has the a of yumipper in it and you could eat when we know whenever there's a wolf would often say over whenever there's a ka is it brings down the shea. So if in this week's para we lain first half of is all about the yumipper that means some of the yum some of the is available in the shabas and the para begins where it gets its name after the death of the two sons of when they came close to hashem and they died. So first of all, I mean the question begs to be asked. Everyone does ask why in the world is this the introduction to the avo. I mean it could have said couple of it was after the building of the Mishkan. Why do you have to mention specifically that the two sons of how is that connected to which is I want to spend some time on tonight. But before uh I get into my main topic there's a beautiful thought from the points out that it does not say Moshe was not to repeat that I'm telling you this which is unlike what's it seems like he did give that message over as we'll get back to soon but says it doesn't say the word that means he says this was a message to Moshe you are about to tell about the you're about to tell him about you're about to tell You can't go into the kesh anytime you want only with this only with the he says just lost two sons because they violated that because they went in they went and they brought so was telling Mosha Rabenu this is not for you to repeat to this is for you to be aware of yourself before you tell this message you need to be sensitive to how difficult This is for our own to hear it. It's an incredible idea. It's an incredible idea in general. We don't know what what people are dealing with. But before you know a person can give someone over a message, he needs to especially in for a rebi know as a rebi it's so important to know what what a kid is going through. Someone once told me he said you know two kids get a 90. See one kid gets a 90 is great. Got a 90. So another kid you don't realize he's starting from -30. He has so many challenges in his life. He didn't get a 90. He got 120 because he had to, you know, he started from below zero. He's starting from so behind the eightball. The the message to Mosherenu is you're going to command and it's going to be a strong command. You need to remember the fact that it's an it's an incredible idea. But Rashi quotes he gave him why it says to a a sick person that came to the doctor or the doctor said I don't want you to eat cold foods I don't want you to sleep in the area where the area is very dank around the meat another person came and he said I don't want you to do those same things I don't want you to die like that guy died so I don't want you to do those things he said who gave zer Zeros in he gave more of his he didn't just tell him what to do this a good idea you tell you you see that guy or you don't see that guy that guy who died don't do what he did the question is and it's a great question is why was why do you have to use a m of person comes to the doctor and the doctor says you're healthy you want to stay that way don't do what he did why is he a mush to a who comes every the the the mal of are very exact wasn't just say it was a healthy person he said don't do what he did don't make the same mistake of it's a great question so before we get back to answer that question I want to share with you an observation that I had a few years ago and I think it's a fascinating observation so fascinating that I'm sharing it with you tonight the yontiff of Pesak is very much connected to higher we kasher kale I mean today it's not till where people have just new ones but kashering is a big thing all the of kashering of libu and everything else >> one second burning >> carbon pes >> carbon pes we roast the carbon pes the carbon on the second day of pesite was roasted barley >> fire one second so pes has a lot with fire in a couple in a few days also Okay. Roasting the carbon pess need I say the maduras of all the fires of harina the fire the you know it was there's a lot of fire going on >> yeah this side of the year >> interesting >> contrast that with the other side of the year the other we do tashik by water we go to the mikvah for yipper throughout But especially before that's in water is all water. They grow by by water. The suka we're very busy knowing about the forecast whether it's supposed to rain or not. We're drawing water. Even the parios this side of the year are all about carbonos. It's all about fire bacious. It says that a mist came up because it didn't rain yet. So there's a lot of a focus on fire this time of the year pes time this whole side not just pes I mean starting from pes this whole ascent from pes to sh and as opposed to the other side of the year where it's all uh it's all about one other observation that I think is very interesting usually during a suda you don't make a brah I mean for dessert you know fruits and something but at the beginning of a suda for sure you don't twice a year that I'm aware of I think only twice a year I think that it's like official that We make a bra. One is bel and the other is on the night of rash where we say a bur pates on the on the on the apple depending what you do, right? We dip the apple in the honey. So, so it's it's just an interesting thing. Hello. So let me share with you a a story that happened a bunch of years ago in order to try to understand what's happening over here with this with this uh contrast. My kids for an Afikomen present they want to go to a Yankees game. I would never do such a thing. My kids wanted they won Afikomen so I had to go right. So they told me not only is the Afikomen present going to the game but you have to you have to listen to the pregame in the car. That's part of the It's part of the the part of the tradition. So they were talking the Yankees were playing against the Red Sox. Um Boston Red Sox for those who know it's a very big rivalry. I wouldn't mention in the base media that the Yankees just swept the Red Sox tonight, but I'm saying just what I would have mentioned it. But Lisa, it's it's an old it's an old rivalry and the two of the oldest teams in in Major League Baseball. And they were talking about the stadiums that both stadiums Yankee stadium was a tradition you know this tremendous if you will you'll excuse me you know for you know the place where the great Yankees Garri and Ruth and Deaggio and Mantel and Maris and all the players all they played in in in in Yankee Stadium and they were saying that the Yankees the the lure of Yankees they have won more championships than any other team in sports I don't know maybe in ancient Rome but other than that they're holding a 27 um at this moment Um, you know, nobody has won that many in any sport, that many championships. It's like, you know, but they were saying on the on this radio program that there's something that Red Sox, where they play in Fenway Park has over Yankee Stadium because a few years ago the Yankees tore down their stadium and they built a new one in the old parking lot. Now it's you wouldn't even know that the old stadium was there. My at the end of the day, it's not the same field where Gary Goa played, where Ruth played. It's across the street. It's a little bit over, but it's not exactly the same. Whereas, if you go to Fenway Park, they did not rip down their park. They redid the entire thing. But I'll share with you a quote. He said, "It should be preserved for no other reason, and this will sound familiar to us, than our children and our children's children should say, that's the mound where Babe Ruth pitched before they traded him to the Yankees. That's the box where Ted Williams, you know, swung his bat. That's the foul pole that Carlton Fisk homerred off. So they're contrasting these two these two great sports teams. There's two ways of his for a person to have renewal. One of them is a fresh start. You purge everything. You rip everything down. You start over from scratch. The other is to redo it to to not just not to extend necessarily but to renovate to by redoing everything that was there until now. Fire destroys. It destroys everything. There's a fire, it destroys everything. But after there's a forest fire, fire firefighter once told me, he said the when when there are fires that they they they what pine cones they explode and seeds break, you know, burst out of them and it regenerates and the new growth is very fresh and and very quick relatively, you know, it starts over again immediately. It starts growing again. Water doesn't necessarily I mean, I guess it could, but water doesn't necessarily usually destroy everything. You have boats at the bottom of the ocean. They're still there. They're covered in rust and everything else, but they're still there. That line is still there. Water doesn't destroy everything in its path, but it separates anything that's not a part of it. It will take it away until we leave only the thing itself. Fire is a mush for a bren for the we talk about it the inner fire within a person. The slavos the the the passion water is representative of anivos of b. What is the shape of water? Depends what you put it in. Water will go wherever you let it go. So water is up here. If there's a place it will go down. It will always go from high to low. Water will always flow. That's flowing water will always go downward. It is a symbol of of humility. If is a who left the path he went off and now he wants to come back what do you tell him to do the first thing you should do say put on fill in learn Torah just start doing mitzvah just just get involved later on you'll you'll have to go backwards and you'll have to fix the past but right now just get involved just do leave behind the past because you JUST JUST START LATER ON you'll make a pes And it's brought down in when we were born. The Pik says that there was never a cry like the cry that went out by I saw I saw in more than one safer it says when when a woman's in labor she cries she cries out of pain. She screams out of pain. Was in labor that night. They were giving birth so to speak to says I took one nation from within another. I removed them became a nation at the time of we were born. So now you jump in. Jump in. You're a new being. jump in with a fire of that is night that there's 64 mitzvah usually at night we don't do any mitzvah but but 64 mitzvah that a person does on Saturday night we're l we're just doing doing good things they say over the only one that has a normally first you get rid of the evil then you do good and say but the the I think that said no when a person the order very often has to be reversed Because if you're going to start with you'll never get to the do the jump into the kadusha kadesh just do in be involved in kadusha feel the feel that islavus and then you'll go back and you'll wash off the bad once you're ready motivated once you already started on that path then you can go back and get rid of it build kadusha from the ground up that is mis it's starting over it's like a fire blazing getting rid of the past and we're starting over tish is a time revitalization. It's recommmitment. We don't turn our back on the past. We look at the past and we say, "It's a new start because I'm cleaning. I'm cleaning everything off, but I'm not getting rid of it. Um in fact the highest level is chu I can make all of my aas into I think the I think the says why in the world is there such an about's party and I need so many details about the drapery I don't have anything else to discuss and I think the says because going to that party was and they did it became every bit of it And so the Pik describes in all the detail all the gash everything else because it became it became for every bit of what was used for the became part of the that's that's tish that's the ultimate of t we have chuva which hopefully that's the goal that's the has a long piece of it that that are followed by another which end on followed by and it ends on that's the rabb that's a it's a different discussion Yes. Okay. >> So, this is also very fascinating. A vegetable comes up from the ground. It's there's nothing there and it breaks through the ground and suddenly you see it. That's la. We make a bur prima unusually so right after we wash actually before we wash and then again we eat a vegetable right after we wash. The symbolizes of the night is the bur priyadama. It breaks through. It's something new that wasn't there. Of course it was there but you couldn't see it like strong mid you could they were there you couldn't see it they were in in in inconscite is a time of renewal fruits look at the trees now at this time of the year you have the trees that were totally bare for months and now all of a sudden it's just miraculous you have to stop and look at it the colors on the trees and soon it's all going to be green which is also beautiful but now you have the pink and the white and the it's just magnificent and the buds on the trees are opening up anyone who didn't yet. Um, it's better to say it in Nissan, but it doesn't end in Nissan. As long as it's still budding, you can still say it. So, yes, still say it. >> Yes, I didn't make it into the I sold the pictures here, but uh but you still could say it and you still should say it if you didn't, but it's a it's it's a it's magnificent brah also. But of that's what a fruit is. It it's it's it regenerates. That's tish. That's the symbol on rash night. We say we say >> opposites of why we make the braha. You make a bra. >> No, not polar opposites. That's the verb and pes is the beginning. It's a new beginning. It's the ladle. It breaks forth from like a vegetable. It breaks forth from the ground. >> You also you also make >> it pates because it fruit a fruit is ready. The tree is there but now the now it's producing. Till now it wasn't producing. Now it's like the winter now it's producing. That's the that's the symbolism to continue this idea further. Rav Schwab in parini where where mentions that they actually died says before just before they died on the first day this is the has just begun this is the thing that you should do and the honor of hem will appear to you what's the says remove it from your heart. Then the honor of Hashem will appear to you. What are we talking about? It says remove that Yates. Which one says it's the Sahara of skipping steps out of that a person is filled with so much love and passion and vos that they want to skip over the details. That's a dangerous thing to do. Kazal tell us when you're love love love blinds a person people make make silly things out of love so he says a mushel of says to a mother I would say better with his sibling I see it with siblings sometimes you know with a sibling one one sibling is hugging their new baby brother or sister and they're hugging them every watch you have to be very careful it's seriously very dangerous they're hugging him a little too tight show it could be could be dangerous for the child he says a mush with a mother hugging the child loves him so much he squeez can't breathe it's very very dangerous he said that's a when it goes too far. It's a very dangerous thing. They were filled with passion. They wanted to serve. They were so excited. They overstepped great people. They overstepped their boundaries. It's emphasized. They weren't commanded. It came from an intense. It came from it came from a yearning. It came FROM they were so thirsty to serve. But it was fatal. So the Torah says also they saw a new fired they wanted to add love to that love told I thought I thought that I knew that it was going to be the Mishk was going to be mikudosh through through people. I thought it was going to be me and you but now I see that they're greater than us. So he says what does that mean that they're greater than us? Cesar Schwab because their ava was Vu and Mosh Aaron's had a but there was something wrong with that with with the Ava that's blev says that's oates that Yates what's amazing he calls it the of of letting your passion go of not keeping yourself in check he said that's the sahara that we're that we're talking about the Mishna says in the first parakishna gimmel Don't be like servants who serve their master in order to get a reward. Be like someone a servant who serves his master not to get a reward. What was Antign saying? Don't do it for a reward. We know and said, "Oh, don't do it for reward. There is no reward." That's what the Reb said and they became. But of course, that's not what they were saying. They were saying that's I'm sorry. was saying he was saying don't do it for that reason. Of course there's a reward but don't do it for the reward. He was saying and what's the end of the Mishna? So the I think even before that explains even though is saying served out of love you have to have it's not enough to serve out of love because a person can overstep their boundaries and he says very beautifully also says we say every morning force our to be subservient to you he says you would say it's the can't be because we already said so he says what does it mean it's our desire to to serve it it's run away with us people get so excited with loving sometimes make up their own things they overstep boundaries they overstep you can't there has to be the is and he said that's why cursed the anger of Shim and Levy their passion was so good in fact that's shim women became the the how can be maybe explains that what do you mean you scattered them in he made them the because they had an anger problem they made him it's not very good he says no he says because the passion was so good that's what you need in order to give over but you have to be you have to be in control also became those who do the mik but it has to be within control Pinas. He said that's the difference with Pinas that he didn't let it get get ahead of him. Pinas was niml. He was filled with zeal and he stood in front of Moshe and he said Mosha Rabenu did you not teach us? Moshabu said yes. He said okay. Then he ran out with this pulled out the sword. We picture Pinas as his hotad not at all. He came to Moshenu. He was level-headed before he went ahead and did his and only then he did it. >> He knew he knew the right thing to do. But but even so but sometimes a person is filled with passion and they think it's the right thing and they overstep. That's the danger of it. >> Stood outside with the sword just in case it needed backup. So I don't know how much he disagreed they did. >> Okay. >> According to >> but he was he was he was upset at their anger that they let it that they didn't that they weren't more in control. There's a there's a well-known story of Schwab quotes it here also when first had the idea to open the first yeshiva he's the mother of all yeshivas and he had the idea he went to his rebi he went to the go and he mentioned it to him and the guy didn't seem so excited about it I don't think you should he was shocked couldn't believe it but the said that's it a few I don't know if it was months later the guy met again he said to him did you open the yes is yeshiva he said the rebba told me not to he said no now you should >> and he said because when you first came to me, you were so filled with an excitement. I said, "I got nervous." Sometimes a person is filled with an excitement. They can go too far. It can get too He said, "So I told you, hold off. Now I see that you're back more level-headed. Now you should open the It's a great idea. It's an amazing idea, but it has to be done with with with Shivian. It has to be done with a levelheadedness." And he says, "That's why we say it was a fascinating thing. Le of Navo tomorrow night, Friday night, Le of Nav before him. We will serve with fear and is when something is very close." What's going on here? It's Friday night. That's what we say on Shabas. It's a year of what's year of he says because it's Shabases and we're so close to and you're so close to have to be very careful. There has to be a sense of so it has to be it has to be tempered. It says in paras about so it says they would serve from 30 to 50. They return from serving in the army, but he goes back to locking the gates also to singing and also to carrying um to to loading up the the ag the wagons. I don't understand why does it say that they went back to locking the gates. They also opened the gates. Why do you focus on the locking and not on the opening? We know it's a very famous medish coming to shs in a few weeks goes to the goes to the old and he says I want to offer you my and they said what's written in it told each of them something that challenged their nature was and each one said oh we can't accept so they asked the question it's not fair why didn't he challenge Yes. So the em is that they say that it's not a kasha because didn't say max once then said mak you blew it says I'm giving you I'm giving you this amazing thing and you ask me what's let me know what's what's what's the content >> that's that's a separate question it's a good question it's a different discussion but but but you know they they uh once you ask you blew it but okay but let's go with this the says huge challenge kali throw because if you look in theukim you'll you you'll you'll be in in high school so I have to have a collection of these stories can blame it on them but another one more baseball story I I once heard this story years ago there was a a pitcher I don't remember what team he was on his name was Bobo he used to call everyone else Bobo so they used to Bobo his name was something nuome was his last name not his real name he used to call everybody else Bobo he was a clown apparently he said that one time I looked him up I uh by the story that I heard. So I looked up some other stories about him. He said one time the pitcher missed a few calls and he was very annoyed. So one time he threw the ball and it was a strike and the pitcher called it a strike and he gets off the mound, walks over to the in front of the umpire and he vows and he says, "Thank you very much, sir." He immediately got ejected from the game. Meaning as if to say he missed all the other calls, but anyway, this Bobo this Bob Newsome, he was he was he was set to be the pitcher when the mighty Yankees were coming to town. And uh the great Deaggio, one of the great uh great great hitters of all time was on the Yankees. Joe Deaggio and he said, "I'm going to find I'm going to find his weakness." He said, "And I'm going to exploit his weakness. You'll see." So Newsome pitched the day Deaggio was in town. And Deaggio ripped three doubles off him. So we came back to the clubhouse afterwards and everyone was uh Hey Bobo, you know what happened? He said, "I found his weakness." He said, "Yeah." He said, "Yeah, I see. Damagu has a weakness to hit doubles. That's his weakness. So I exploited his weakness." Yeah. So Clar has a weakness. We have a weakness. not to hit doubles. We have a weakness of a it's a weakness but it's it's a beautiful weakness. The weakness is that we have such a tok to be close to when you see by if you look in the before tells when they're standing there going to go up to he says beautiful stunning and he says yes he says I ask all my students every year what does mean they never get it preparation love excitement noba means boundaries boundaries that's what we call the three days before shu is three days of boundaries so Every little kid they say that if you tell him there's a billion stars in the sky, he believes you. Tell him it's wet paint, he has to touch it. So don't touch the mountain. So don't don't do that. Don't do like cuz you know that's it. Well, >> it's a weakness because it can get out of control. >> You have to stay in your lane. That's the VA. And fire it gets too close. But you see it says it again for tomorrow comes up to what's going to tell it's already it already began and he tells him Moshe come in go down the mountain and tell them again don't touch the mountain tell him not to not to rush up the mountain. They can't even if they wanted to. YOU ALREADY SAID testimony would warn them not to go out of their lane did challenge. We have a quote unquote. Of course, it comes from a good place. Just like parents who over over, you know, over love their children and therefore don't allow them to make their own mistakes in life. That's also it comes from a good place and has Yeah. Now they say a few years ago already they have something else called they they have beyond helicopter parents. I saw a few years ago there I walked into a house I don't remember whose house it was and there was a woman um with a helicopter on her head and it said on a shirt said helicopter mom and she said I just embraced it. My kids make fun of me all the time I'm a helicopter mom. So I just for him she was wearing a helicopter on her head. But uh but I saw an article once and now they're beyond helicopter numbers they have snowplow moms. Snowplow moms. They don't just hover above. They plow everything in their path and they breed children who can't get along in life. They can't, you know, they call up the boss uh when the kid's 25 years old and say, "How dare you not take my child or or I heard you're not so sure if you want to take my child and that kid's out of a job the next day, you know." So >> yeah, it's a big problem. So the says that was the challenge did challenge Israel. Theim says the of the older was it was to warn I guess but to to to emphasize to the younger generation about the closing of the gates symbolism of this idea don't overstep you're in the you want to don't make up stuff don't do your own thing don't go beyond that's why it says and of course also but it emphasizes to remind them about this idea The the Kutsker once met they were talking and he asked him why did forgive Cl by theel but he didn't forgive them by the we're still suffering from the but he forgave them they weren't destroyed we say tomorrow night coming in how come we didn't forgive them then said a very good he said I'll tell you why he said was at the they didn't know from chuva when they cried they meant they were broken over what they had done so was most sincere level of chuva and so they were forgiven by they already knew that they were forgiven the first time around so in the back of their minds it wasn't total break oh we'll do chuva so it wasn't fully fully sincere that's what said and the said I have a different explanation he said at the Ael, it was a terrible terrible mistake. But where did it come from? It came from a desire wanted to connect. They were afraid without Mosha. It came from a desire for his a desire for for closeness for us. Maglin was a desire for convenience. Cl said you know I don't think we can go in ter Israel that wasn't willing to forgive when the ael even though again it was a terrible mistake but it came from a desire to be close to aesh. That's what that's what drove it was willing to forgive. >> The opposite because when they wanted to come in they said we're not we can't we can't do this. We can't um you know work >> we're not able to >> they didn't believe in themselves. >> Yeah also they didn't believe in themselves but he said it came from it came from from more than than from a stick of source. Such a beautiful thought we asked at the beginning was Aron why is the mush at the beginning of the par about a who goes to the doctor? Why can't it be a healthy person? was Aron. So I heard this from Ribbon and I also saw it from the Reb. He said yes was a he was lovesick. Where do you think got it from? It came from Aaron. >> He's praised with this. >> Of course. Of course it's a good thing. But it has to be it has to be. So that's that's why the begins two sons of why do you have to use a mush with because you're vulnerable to this because you have such a it could be yeah if it's not it could be it's a potential weakness it's a beautiful weakness but it's a weakness and it's fatal it was it was fatal so I'm coming to my conclusion I have to tell you a beautiful story. I heard this from Finkelman who who said he heard this over from the skullb >> who he was close with. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was apparently a very very holy man. >> He added a sheen on his face. >> Yeah. So he said over the following >> he said over the was traveling once Araf Shabas >> and he cameos like many was very he did not travel after so immediately they came to the first inn that they that they found they came into the inn and of was already there with all of his but was very different from the bad was the bad was and was very much >> much mass. >> So the inkeeper was uncomfortable. What should I do? Your your mahalik is different. It's you know they're both but they're different is going to be uncomfortable. He's her first. So where heard the story told he's the promised he'll behave meaning he meant like he'll he'll keep it under wraps. So he says they come to hidi hidi Friday night usually hidi andichu can imagine he said they came to kdish Friday night the whole thing was sitting there you know but kdesh were probably you can I you can imagine start playing on my thing imagine what kdesh was like in nothing he sat he made it through kdesh made it through koal they're sitting there by the fish and one of the they serve the fish and one of turned to the the and he said to him he said uh because in in you do you do you you love pepper in Yiddish that's what you say do you want pepper right I don't speak a lot but he said he said on the skull you said the he started bouncing up and down said HE SAID HE said he jumped up THE TABLE WENT FLYING EVERYTHING WENT ACROSS ALL OVER the place. He said that was it. Spent the rest of Shabas closed off in his room. This was the I that that was the what I heard from Rafing said over from the skull. Reb was looking up to see if the story was quoted anywhere else. I just saw did not say this over but he I just saw that they say I don't know why was apparently was wearing a talis and the talis got food all over it and the next week when they wanted to clean it off after shabas they wanted to clean the talis said no no no no he said he wants the stains from but even though he had a different malik than him he wants the stains on his talis and he never cleaned it and it seems that that this this what it said over there that this talis was passed down from reba to reba and they would only wear it yum kipper And the last one, >> no, he said that the I think was the last one. He had this talis. He only wor by and then he has to be buried in it. >> Oh wow. >> Just before just before the Nazis uh shortly a few years before the Nazis came. So I don't part of the story I don't know. But this part of the story for sure I'm I'm not saying it's not true. I'm just saying but this this way I heard it from the from the skull reb. The passion the excitement. We know that we're we're in the period of we're counting. Why do we count? You know, kids in in in Yeshiva, they start counting down to graduation. We count up towards is like a like a servant who is desiring the shade. He's just he just wants to be in the embrace. And of course just to connect it for a brief moment that the second second par of the mitzvah for to be kosh the raan says to be a kad means not to be a no person can keep all the everything that he's supposed to do and be a disgusting person. Unfortunately we know people like that to be a kad means to be a person that's to be among people and yet to be proper. That's why you and says who cares if it was what does it matter? So the says because it's easy to be a kadesh if you're on a remote island away from everybody else. The of life is to be ash when you're with people to but the the idea from here the the kadusha of yumipper the passion of yipper it's a it's a long we're a long way from yum kipper but we're also not so far away from yumipper on the other end but the avod of pes avod of shu is this aod of fire of this avod of excitement in order to combat the fires of the which are of course as we all know very very strong should help all of us to be able to internalize the messages to be able to be to to have that through this shabas and to also continue on our ascent towards Amazing.