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Mindflex- The Chanukah Candle Inside You- Part 2- Rabbi Shlomo Buxbaum
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good evening everyone
welcome to mineflex my name is herbert
bucksbaum coming to you from silver
spring maryland
and very happy to be with you for part
two
of a series that we started last week
the chanukah candle inside of you
how to illuminate your soul during a
spiritual blackout
and the first and foremost thank you
project inspire
everything that you're doing with the
mind flex the shabbat show
the cooking shows so much torah
so much inspiration during these unusual
times
so thank you for that and to all of you
who are tuning
in who tune in each week those of you
joined us last week if you're joining us
for the first time this week
to those that we communicated over the
course of the week and your feedback
from last week's class
we so much appreciate it and looking
forward to delving
into our topic a little bit deeper
tonight a little bit more practical
tonight
uh to really show how this special
amazing time of year hanukkah
wow wow it's tomorrow night and uh
showing how this this time is has so
many messages for us
in our struggles in our growth so let's
get started
with a little bit of learning about the
chanukah candle inside
of you
we spoke last week how chanukah
comes at the darkest time of the year
because it represents a very dark time
in history but a time where there was
a transition in the hanukkah story
around the overall general time of the
hanukkah story
the era of prophecy had stopped
and because of that the jewish people as
a whole
had to readjust their style of
connecting
to god connecting to torah
and therefore there was this really
explosion or this
new wave or this new approach of the
oral torah
becoming much more dynamic but
much more focused on our
own intellect our own
our own novel ideas our own
interpretations and understandings
which might seem to go against this
concept of a divine word of god giving
us the torah
and yet the of the oral torah is a
further revelation of the power
of human consciousness human intellect
to be able to reach deep down and
discover
almost this built-in hidden prophetic
aspect inside of us that isn't coming
from the outside
what's coming from within and we use
that to apply that to our
at the time that we're in now but our
own struggles as well
as we go through our own spiritual
journey to say that just because you're
no longer feeling that inspiration
from the outside doesn't mean that
there's anything wrong with you
it just means that this is an
opportunity for you to instead of
looking
outwards to look inwards and rediscover
what your own inner light what your own
inner connection uh is is all about to
get
creative to become original and to be
able to discover
almost that prophetic aspect that we
have that lives inside of us
so what else does hanukkah have to teach
us about these highs and lows
what other tools can chanukah
teach us and give us that we can use
to help us make this journey through
life
make our spiritual search make our
search to discover
a dynamic judaism that we're all looking
for especially during these dark times
what messages and tools can hanukkah
give us to bring that out to connect to
that even more
tonight we'll focus a little bit more on
the menorah
we'll also learn some lessons from the
dreidel everyone's favorite toy
and we're going to look at the moon not
literally but we're going to
explore and speak a little bit about the
moon and actually
find a calming thread between
those three things the menorah the
dreidel
and the moon and how this all ties in
to hanukkah so i hope that you're ready
to come with me
on this journey in the very little
amount of time
that we have together hanukkah
perhaps you've noticed has a very
unusual connection to
the moon number one i'll
show a couple of examples of this number
one chronic is different
than all of the other holidays that we
have
most holidays that we have come right
in the middle of the month the 15th day
of the month we have so many holidays
coming if not
then they come in the beginning of the
month and
the reason behind that is that in
judaism obviously we're connected we go
after the lunar calendar we set the
cycle of our holidays based upon the
moon
and on the 15th day the moon is at its
fullest
which means that since we believe that
our holidays are
connected to the energy of the
mazza load of the constellations of the
lunar system
so therefore whatever we're trying to
tap into the power of that month is
strongest on the 15th
in the beginning of the month perhaps
it's leading up to the 15th but still
it's on the way up in terms of the fact
that the moon is
becoming brighter as the month goes on
and therefore
the power of that month the energy of
that month the model of that month
is getting stronger chanukah on the
other hand
is at the tail end of the month so
pretty much when hanukkah begins the
25th the moon is really almost down to
nothing
and through the eight days really once
hanukkah ends
which is already in the beginning of the
next month of tami's kind of right after
chanukah ends
that's when we can begin blessing the
new moon
right or saying the blessing on the moon
of the next month
but within the actual time of hanukkah
the moon is almost not there it's almost
not present which is unusual
for a jewish holiday so that's
one thing to point out about an unusual
something unusual about chanukah
but the connections between chanukah and
the moon
go somewhat deeper
our sages teach us and every word of our
sages is meant to teach us profound
lessons
nothing can ever be taken on surface
level
our sages teach us that of all of the
different myths vote that the greeks
tried to ban
they had their eyes targeting three
mitzvot
shabbat jabbas
circumcision prismila and then the third
one was
the sanctification of the new moon
we know that in temple times you
wouldn't have a set calendar but the new
month would be established by witnesses
seeing the birth of the new moon and and
going to
based in the court and sanctifying the
new moon
and whereas basin would say miku dash we
are now sanctifying this is a new
month and kinesha chodesh was the third
on this
list that our sages teach us that the
greeks had a bone to pick with now
if you're listening to this shabbat is
obviously a
hallmark of what it means to be a jew we
are
deeply interconnected with shabbat it
very much
paints a picture of our jewish
connection brit mila
is one of the most personal it's
literally the stamp of god on
us we know that greece really they they
looked
up to the human body and will be here to
say that human body needed
perfection was something that was
appalling to them
so to to see that shabbat and britney
lash and
shabbos circumcision these things that
the greeks had a problem with that
is is very much intuitive we can see
that we can understand that
kirisha sanctifying the new moon not as
much
not as much we can't it's much harder to
see
why of all the different mitzvoth you
know ben having
bagels and locks you know ben
having so many different things you
could think about kosher right and again
not to say the greeks are okay with all
of this stuff maybe they like bagels and
locks i don't know
but um but the the the target for
for our sages to teach us that they
targeted
come on do they really is that really
such an
offense to them do they have something
against the moon
so why specifically that that's
something that's discussed
in our sages
another interesting connection
our sages teach us something else we
know
the great teacher of the jewish people
rob that was moshe the only the only uh
torah personality who has this term of
right our our teacher brought down all
of torah
and and gave it to the jewish people
and i say to say that there were three
different
mitzvot where moshe had to be shown
in a vision he needed the visuals he
didn't necessarily
he couldn't picture it on his own
according to our sages where they just
said
he needed god to show him in a visual
exact visual demonstration of the
mitzvah
three of them one was
this mitzvah that we just mentioned of
sanctifying the new moon and exactly
what the moon should look like at that
time that it should be sanctified
okay so we have the moon but listen to
the second thing
when it came to the construction of the
mishkan the tabernacle
moshe was able to comprehend all of the
details
except for the menorah
where it says that when god told him
that the menorah needs to be made out of
one block and rashi quoting our sages
says
moshe said i need a visual god has to
show him a visual of how that looked
the third one the giving of the shekel
for the counting we're not going to get
into tonight because it's not our
subject
it also links into what we're going to
say but again
our time is limited so we'll focus just
on this connection that we see over here
once again the moon and the menorah
these seem to be two things that that
moshe is not comprehending
so we have again we have an unusual
this unusual connection where hanukkah
is coming
at a time of the month where the moon is
is almost disappeared
we have the greeks seem to be bothered
by the sanctifying of the moon
and we have moshe who doesn't seem to
be able to visualize this mitzvah of
sanctifying the new moon
and also not coincidentally seems to
have a problem visualizing the menorah
what are our sages trying to teach us
not to be too creative but i would like
to make a little bit of an observation
up here
again i didn't see this anywhere but
perhaps you agree if
not disregard the next uh 60 seconds
but i'm a big fan of the dreidel we have
a lot of war games in our home but
nothing is as much fun as a good game of
dreidel
and you spin the dreidel and really
what's going on when you spin the
dreidel is you get a good you can't see
it on my table but
now it was not a great spin i got a nun
by the way just in case you were
wondering
you give it a spin and what happens so
the dreidel is spinning
hence it's called a dreidel or a civil
bone which means to drape like to
be spinning going in circles but then
you also have unless you're a really
good spinner you can keep it in place
but usually you have the dreidel itself
is kind of going around
but also spinning
now i think that you see where i'm going
over here but
if you ever take a look interestingly
enough at the moon
and again maybe i'm crazy maybe i'm
crazy feel free
send me a message afterwards say
spam
you're crazy but to me it seems
that the dreidel is doing kind of the
same orbit
that we perceive when we see how the
moon
itself does its own little jig its own
little spin
while simultaneously doing its sivirah
which is why we have different dynamics
of light right
because we're always seeing that same
angle of the moon but we're seeing it at
different ways because it's spinning and
also going in a cycle around
and to me i see perhaps
against showing now how hanukkah is
connected to the moon that maybe
the dreidel is also somewhat connected
and let's see if we can put all of these
pieces
together we know our sages teach us
that the reason that our calendar
goes by the lunar calendar is because in
many ways we identify with the moon
we see the moon we see ourselves
reflected it sounds kind of like a pun
over there because the whole idea of the
moon is that it reflects the light of
the sun but yet
we see ourselves reflected in the
cycle of the moon we see this with the
jewish people as a whole
as being a nation that waxes and wanes
a nation that seems to be getting
smaller that seems to be on the brink
of elimination through our persecution
through the through the fact that we're
being exiled that we're being trampled
upon
and yet somehow we make a comeback
somehow
right where everything it seems like
it's over and boom we're back again
back again just like the moon the same
cycle
and based on that we understand that all
of spirituality works like that as well
as individuals we wax and we wait
sometimes we feel positive sometimes
we're getting stronger and stronger
as we spoke about in our last class and
then sometimes we're getting weaker
and the name of the game the name of
being
successful in this journey of trying to
become spiritual is
learning how to ride those waves
learning how to balance when we feel
like we're about to tip
learning how to find that inner spark
that is who we are as a people
it represents our nation's history but
it represents
our cycle through life so we look at the
moon
we admire the moon we ask the moon to
teach us we bless them we give up
on the moon we sanctify the moon because
we
see ourselves we see our journey we see
the moon
as symbolic of who we are
and that's why we said as well that the
time in history when chanukah comes
was somewhat a time of a blackout where
we had to look
inwards and we had to discover ourselves
but it certainly doesn't feel good
and even though we know the torah and
even though we know that that's the way
it works
when we're in it a minute when you're in
it
we know at that moment
when things seem to be blacking out when
we seem to be struggling
when we feel disconnected when we feel
like we're not
becoming the individuals that we thought
that we would be in
any aspect of life we feel like
failures we feel down and very often
we feel like we want to give up
and then we look at this mitzvah of kids
and the exact moment when the jewish
people would look up at the
moon and they would say
they say this is absolute holiness and
when was it when when was it
it was at a moment at a time of the
month when the moon was barely
there when you can barely see it and
this statement of looking out looking
into the black sky
looking into it you can barely see where
the moon is only a sliver
and looking up and saying that moon that
blackness that darkness that
struggle that moon that's just
struggling to stay alive that moon that
she's struggling to stay connected
that's the kudus mccood that has so much
holiness
that's amazing when god you know people
say said i discussed this all the time
with people who were who were in a rut
and uh
in in my job is having the privilege of
doing care of so
many people have have ruled themselves
out
not for me i'm not a good jew blah blah
blah blah blah
i tell them think about which jewish
people
god decided to build the jewish people
upon
it was a jewish people that were in
egypt on the 49th level of impurity that
was so low god said
those are the jewish people that's the
nation that i want.
in the darkness of the night that is
what we consider holiness we can only
appreciate that if
we realize that the spirituality that we
live for is not the spirituality of
always
trying to reach a destination always
saying i'm becoming that i'm this i'm
that
but it's a it's a spiritual journey of
saying that no matter where i am
right now today my struggle today
is the most important thing that i can
bring to this planet
because so often we're for our our
our measures of success within our
spiritual growth
are kind of framed the way we measure
our our bank account you know
you're doing well in business and you
get you have more money or you're you're
or any external accomplishments
of the greeks they're all about
accomplishments hey check out my body
i've been to the gym yeah
this is what i'm repping today rolled at
their accomplishments
in math and science and art but all of
that is hey i'm a better artist than you
and i came up with this new theory
it was all the in the world of greece
their accomplishments
are measured only by what they can put
on paper and say
this is what i accomplished and you
didn't
what our sages with ghazal are teaching
us the reason that the greeks had such a
problem with kirisha conceptually
this idea that as jews we could say
don't measure me
don't measure me by anything else
but the struggle that i put in today
where i'm at
what i'm struggling with right now that
is the most important thing
this is not to say and i know that many
people perhaps might be thinking if
you're not then i
am so i'm going to say it that we
shouldn't set goals and try to
accomplish
obviously the way we push ourselves
forward is to try to accomplish but
listen
i'm from a world and i know speaking to
a very wide audience and
and maybe you are as well a beautiful
world
beautiful world of yeshiva
where so many students
finish large tractates had major
accomplishments
wrote sparring books gave
presentations and in the desire to
push us and to motivate us forward often
also it became about
accomplishments and we forgot we forgot
that every single day just the very fact
we and when i say we are i i mean me
i forgot in that world in that
environment that just the opportunities
to sit down for half an hour for an hour
for two hours for whatever it is
and say okay for this time god hashem
this time it's just us this time we have
an opportunity to connect
i don't know i don't know that i'll ever
be finishing massive track dates i don't
know that i'll ever be giving
you know major presentations that i'll
ever be right i don't know
but i know that i have an hour now and
often that got
lost in the adventure of trying to
become
something big something great not
realizing
that just the fact that i had that
opportunity was greatness
and i think both of those things are so
important to keep in mind and certainly
when we're on fire when things are
amazing absolutely
try to reach for those accomplishments
reach for the stars
but during a spiritual blackout that's
not time to reach for the stars during
spiritual blackout it's time to look at
what we have at that moment
and say i have this right now today and
this
is mikudash this is holi
that was the struggle between the greeks
and the jews between the greek way
between the westernized way of
evaluating of measuring our
accomplishments
in the way we do in torah
i'd like to suggest because i brought up
earlier
this another connection between the moon
and between the menorah and how moshe
needed to be shown a visual presentation
of both the menorah and the moon and
somehow
khazalar sages are weaving together
these two things they're making us
notice that something something about
both the moon and the menorah was
something that wasn't on moshe's radar
and we know
we know that our sages elsewhere
say that looking at moshe's face was
like looking at the sun pine moshe
says that his student joshua was like
the moon
but moshe was like the sun
what does that mean we know as we get to
know moshe more and more
as we see moshe rise to become the
greatest prophet
to ever walk the planet by the time
moshe is standing at the top of her cena
of sada giving us the torah we know
that moshe himself has completely
nullified himself to the word of god
that he's purely a mouthpiece of god
he's an extension
of god moshe
is not just the prophet he's the prophet
of all prophets
his prophecy is on such a high level
that there is almost no motion that it's
purely god that's what it means when you
say moshe's like the sun
and the fact that god is shining this
light right through him
well as we said last week and we'll just
mention this again we said it earlier
that hanukkah marks the transition in
history
when prophecy stopped and when that
world of prophecy that world represented
by moshe that world of the written torah
of moshe
moshe who represents torah sheba the
written torah
that era came to an end
and the jewish people had to rediscover
their spirituality their torah
not the spirituality of the sun not the
spirituality of prophecy
but the spirituality of the moon the
spirituality
that rises and falls that ebbs and flows
that waxes and wanes that goes up and
goes down
and one that we have to look inward not
outwards
perhaps is it possible my suggestion
tonight to you
is maybe what our sages are
trying to teach us when they say that
moshe could not
perceive this moon was to teach us that
our avodah our service to god is
different
since we're no longer in the era of
prophecy
we no longer receive spirituality like
the sun like moshe did it's an era of
rising and falling
it's an arrow where we have to look at
the moon when it's
almost not there when when when the sky
is black when we feel
what's called in many capitalistic texts
consciousness as opposed to mochin the
godless expanded consciousness
when we're in this place of darkness and
be able to say
this too is holy moshe of because he was
so great because he was the profitable
prophet
that was something that he couldn't
possibly experience
it wasn't his abode it wasn't his
service
so god says i'm going this you won't be
able to visualize but i'm going to show
it to you
and the menorah is the very vessel in
the temple
that represents that it's going to be
the menorah these lights of the menorah
that represent that hidden light that
represents that light in the darkness
that light that you have to look inwards
and say oh okay if i can just like
i can just do one light just one
accomplishment today
then maybe two tomorrow then maybe three
maybe i could build myself all the way
back up
the menorah represents that light so the
menorah is connected to the moon
and both of those motions said this is
not my abode
this is this is something that down the
line this
this kedusha this holiness this will be
brought
into the world by the jewish people
later on later on in time
perhaps that is the message of our sages
and why specifically these two things
and then we get to our next mitzvah
the mitzvah of the dreidel
i'm sure that everyone is excited might
have to keep on picking up my dreidel if
you're
excited if you're adrenal games tomorrow
night the kids are getting excited i
actually even have my gelato
over there we're getting ready
i was thinking maybe in this year of
cobin if someone could have invented
like an
online dreidel game that people could
play dreidel over zoom how that would
look i don't know if
anyone has something out there
but the dreidel is so deep
many of you might be familiar with the
brilliant
letters that are on the dreidel we know
it has a nun
the gimbal you probably seen this in
reverse
a hay and a shin
and what this stands for what we're
taught that this stands for is
nice great miracle
happened there it happened in exile
but our sages teach us
that these letters of the dreidel stand
for something else as well
the maharao great great sage the maharal
of prague
of prague and many others
teach that if we look at the human being
we see that the human being is
structured
of several different domains we're built
with many different realms many
different parts and as much as we're all
one human being but yet we know there
are different parts of us there's
different aspects of our consciousness
of our personality and in
many of the uh holy texts
the ancient texts they described as
psychology speaks about as well and has
discovered as well again much later on
in history than our ancient texts
that those can be divided in to
what we would commonly say
physical body heart mind and then often
you'll see this idea of spirit
which doesn't necessarily work as well
with what we're trying to say but let's
explain
how the maharal teaches it and the
language that the maharaja uses
the morale says that there is a physical
body that we have
which is a goof kuff is the hebrew word
for a physical body
the next level up he describes as being
the nephesh
the nephesh is the life force that's
inside of us it's what animates us it's
what gives us life
not to be confused with the nephesha who
kissed the
the godly soul which is called the new
shama that is a bigger conversation but
when he's referring to the nephesh
he's talking about the overall construct
of the fact that we are
animated human beings with the ability
to
want to love to emote to have emotions
to feel all the different types of
emotions and have all sorts of
human experiences those are all
connected to our
nephesh the life force that's inside of
us that that
upgrades us from just purely animals
which have a much
lower level nephesh they're a goof with
a lower nephesh
we are a goof with a much more
sophisticated nephesh
above that is
when we think of the intellect we think
sort of about how that computer right
here works our brain and
in our mind but we know especially
discussed so much now today
in modern psychology the idea of being
mindful and how the mind itself can can
really reach up and grasp beyond just
the basic mechanics of day-to-day life
all of that is included in the sechel so
we have again we have the guff
the nephesh but what
weaves all of this together why are
these not three
separate different parts with with each
one sort of acting in its own way
because we know
that they don't all necessarily want the
same thing you know the goof wants to
eat
the nephesh might want to have emotions
fall in love the mind wants to
understand the seeks knowledge
but what is it that unites us so there's
a force that's something that's even
greater the the perhaps you would say
that this is the eye of our identity
that is the orchestrator of this whole
thing that says come on guys all right
let's think about the camp counselor
right okay mind nephesh
body come together let's join forces
let's become one it's the force that
unites them
maharal's language he calls this force
the all the general the whole
well you got it already but if you take
a look at the dreidel
the letters of the dreidel are
nefesh
human domains for human realms those are
represented on
four sides of the trail
there's many other ideas behind this so
for example the numerical value of all
these letters together
can equal snake which is our
sarhara our evil inclination it also has
the same numerical value of
mashiach is the messiah right
the cyanic times that we pray for so we
see
so much in these letters of the dreidel
the maharal and others teach that these
four aspects these four domains
correspond to the four different exiles
we won't go into exactly why or how it's
not our subject for tonight
but they say that they correspond to the
four exiles one of them being
babylon the other being
persia where the purim story happened
the other being yavan our story hanukkah
and the final one being rome which is
the exile which began with the
destruction of the second temple that
we're still in today
but for us for tonight let's talk about
how they relate to us in our own
processing
we know already from the mishnah in
pirkei that says that the world stands
on three things
on torah aravoda which is service to god
prayer and other types of services and
that many of the commentaries say that
they correspond to those
two to three domains again excluding the
cult
but the three separate domains so
whereas torah is basically a
mindful exercise using myself
to connect to god to serve god to pray
is done with my
nephesh my life force
[Music]
him i hope that this is relevant to
everyone here if you're not i'm just
rattling off
just some verses that speak about the
yearning of the life force to get close
to god
and then i said kindness is very much
about the goof the physical
interpersonal interactions so we see
already that different parts of our
spiritual
service are connected to different
realms that are within us
but putting that aside on a very
personal level
i think that we find that if we look
at our relationship to judaism
every single human being is different
and i think for some people we find that
there are certain mitzvoth that
deeply resonate with us they're
naturally
nephesh mitzvoth they touch us
emotionally they awaken us up i'm
connected this fires me up
uh i'm sure a lot of you over here who
are watching this
watch or receive some of the meaningful
minutes um
videos that they send out and they have
a wonderful uh podcast
as well and one of the great questions
that they asked their guests have
listened to several of them they're
always
you know so much fun one of the great
questions that they ask their different
guests is what's your mitzvah
it's such a great question to ask all of
ourselves what's your mitzvah but what
is the mystery that fires you up because
everyone has their own mitzvah
they say oh this when i'm doing this i'm
in the zone
this is me this is my mitzvah
some don't speak to us as much but but
they make sense we get it we understand
it
and because of that we we here we do
them logically
knowing that this is important they're
more in our say how we get it
we get it we don't necessarily feel it
as much but at least we can grasp it
and some we do with our goof we do them
purely externally
okay i'm a jew i'm part of the program i
do it i don't
feel it i can't understand that i might
even have questions on it but you know
what
i'm part of the club i'm committed and i
don't when to do it
and the goal is that really we're
thriving for the
cold right we want to be able to fully
engage every part of ourselves
we want to say that we do it with our
bodies but we feel it and we understand
that right we want the hot coal
we want the whole package but the
reality is as human beings
that we're different and we operate
different the reality is that
different parts are going to speak to us
furthermore there are times
that things are going to vary there are
times like we've been saying all along
that we're going to feel just totally
not flesh we're going to feel
totally excited everything is going well
i'm so excited
about my growth right now this is just
working i'm in my groove
sometimes it's just safer sometimes okay
i'm not feeling it but
but i get it i'm making a plan i'm
working it out
i'm figuring it out and sometimes it's
goof
sometimes we're just doing the motions
it's purely a show
we're just going we're doing we're doing
we're doing and we don't necessarily
feel it
but we're doing it and while that might
seem
not exciting while it might seem
uninspiring we know sharon the path of
the just many other books say
that as long as the person that the one
thing that we can always control we can
control what inspires us
we can't always control ourselves but we
can control our goal
we can control our bodies and if you're
in a bad mood you can still smile
you might not be able to change your
mood but you can smile
maybe if you smile it will change your
mood maybe if you dance
a little bit you'll become happier your
body you can always control
so even though we necessarily we don't
necessarily feel that that's exciting
but yet doing things purely with our
body alone
also has some holiness to it
based on this now when we spin the
dreidel we see a whole nother story
the very same way the chanukah is about
the moon
where we look at the moon when it's wet
when there's a blackened and we say
that's holy the same way the menorah
comes at the darkest time of the year
and we light it and we say that this
will be small little lights they're
going to light up the night
the same thing is when we spin the
dreidel when we spin it we know
there's going to be certain possibly
gonna be face up and there's gonna
be certain parts that are facing down
sometimes this is gonna be working but
that's not
sometimes i'm gonna be learning well but
prayer is gonna be in the tube sometimes
i'm gonna
be doing great in my interpersonal
connections but
not so all my spirituality sometimes
marriage is great but being a parent is
hard sometimes being a parent is great
but i just
can't get on the same page sometimes i'm
doing great at home
but lousy outside right whatever it is
sometimes things gonna be looking up and
sometimes things are going to be looking
down
and hanukkah is the holiday
of being able to celebrate where
we are wherever we are in the struggle
pushing out this idea that it's not
always going to be a call it's not
always going to be big and dramatic but
sometimes it's just going to be
what can i do today to make this happen
you know i i this is a new platform for
me to be speaking to the mindfulness
audience and and
i haven't yet figured out exactly who's
out there
and i want to share something um which
i hope you'll forgive me there there's a
a vague uh reference over here
to a uh series a a
uh a netflix series which streamed last
year that in my
that in the cure of world caused us in
the carbon
a lot of trouble a lot of explaining and
again without
just being vague about it and
obviously many will know what i'm
talking about
but it was a show about
a woman who struggled being part
of her community because of religion
and left her community and it portrayed
the community that she came from
in a very very dark light and to those
who are purely on the outside who knew
nothing
about that community were very very much
disturbed and and us in the in the care
of worlds
in the world of outreach had the
difficult task
to try to on the one hand portrayed this
community in in in in a
in a positive light in the beautiful
light that it really is
and and to show how
it wasn't necessarily the the greatest
portrayal there was so much
that was overplayed and just you know
silly and dark
but on the other hand you know to be
also somewhat sensitive
to the fact that the show did resonate
with many people
there was a woman who my wife and i were
were speaking with who has somewhat of a
similar story
not quite that extreme but somewhat of a
similar story
and she told us that there was a scene
in this show
where this young woman who had left
were with her new group of friends and
there was a line where she said
i don't know exactly what it was but it
sound it was something to the extent
of i had to leave my community
because my god expected too much of me
and this woman who my wife and i were
speaking to
who had somewhat of a similar story she
said that that scene
when she heard that line she burst out
crying and she cried and cried and
actually played that scene again and
again because she said that
my whole life that's always the way i
felt
i always felt like my god is asking too
much of me my god is asking too much of
me
you know in the torah when when when
abraham when avraham
is going to thinking that he's going to
sacrifice isaac it says that he saw the
place from afar
he felt distant very often we feel that
we're
we're just distant we feel completely
disconnected
and what a tragedy to think
that god is asking too much of me and
and i have to run away because i i just
can't
rather than to be able to focus on the
beauty of whatever struggle
ever struggle and to realize that my
struggle even though
even though it seems so so embarrassing
it seems so
petty but yet within that struggle
there's such holiness
there's holiness that is exploding from
that struggle
sometimes when i feel disconnected and
i'm just going with my goof i'm just
going with the
with the external akav the the torah
says
in the beginning of parishes that it
when it comes
to the footsteps of mashiach this is the
way that that our sages interpret this
a cavashire shaman because you listen to
my voice and the language is a kev
which means a heal sometimes we're just
putting one step in front of the other
but that journey is beautiful that
journey is holy
that journey unlocks the great kedusha
great holiness that we're here for
that's the holiness of chanukah
that's what we're supposed to extract to
take away from chanukah
that we become the moon we become the
menorah
we become the dreidel and know that
whatever we're going through in life
that's the tremendous holiness that we
were placed
in this world to bring out i want to
wish
everyone over here a wonderful beautiful
illuminating
hanukkah a light that wipes away all of
the darkness
and again i hope that we meet someday in
person i invite everyone to
reach out in whatever platforms you're
on
and we can find one another and
hopefully
we could continue this wonderful journey
and greet
moshiach together thank you for your
time tonight i wish everyone
a good