Mind-Flex Series- Why Jews Cant live without Torah- Rabbi Yitzchok Feldheim

hello everybody out there in the project inspire universe I just want to begin by saying thank you this is a great opportunity everything that projects fire does is is professional polished fun and today especially anyone is sitting at home and this is what you want to do during quarantine you want to watch some Torah it's got to be the holiest crowd in the world and I'm happy to be part of it a little bit more of a somber note I just wanted to say that I'm a middle of we call a faithless in mourning my father passed away on the seventh day of Pesach from Corona and it's very hard obviously he didn't have much of a funeral or a Shiva and this is a small opportunity for me to do something for his neshama this is what we do as Jews with Torah would teach Torah in honor of the memory as a source of should be a source of uplifting for the soul of my father Yaakov David Ben Menachem okay let's talk some Torah together this is a very important topic and I'm looking forward to the class okay so this series of which my classes one segment of is called why can't the Jew live without Torah so the answer a question like that really and this is my style like really I always like to do I consider myself in many ways a student of moshe haim was out of the rum cow it's an acronym Moshe high heels are though who lived in the 1600s in Italy incidentally tonight under nothing's incidental but tonight is his yard site shimozawa so his style is to always begin every discussion first with giving the entire overview of what the big picture is the purpose of life would and then to zoom in on this detail and then usually the questions almost answer themselves when you ask a question the context of the entire big structure in the big picture so you can sort of start to at least half of the question gets answered so let me give you my sort of my view of the big picture the way we understand it you see there are different ways to understand you know what's going on here you know to sort of make them into two simple groups it's like this many people look at religion the idea that God is the God is so much bigger than this universe this universe can't have anything to do with God and therefore there is if there is a will of God it's it's sort of like an arbitrary system God created things that he calls good and if you do those things then you cash it in for Goods and prizes you know life therefore is sort of like an obstacle course it's God created temptations and you have a good inclination Nibbana collation and they're supposed to fight it out in life and if you avoid all the bad stuff he put out there and don't be tempted and don't stray and you stay focused then you will get rewarded with eternity or whatever it is that's good the other way to understand that is that there's actually a value in this world that this world is is that the reason why we do things is with purpose and that's that's how we look at the world and the way we explain it is as follows is the simplest way is we think of God is the perfect beam inherent in in imperfection by definition perfection needs nothing so if God is perfectly he has no needs so then why would he create a universe what is you only do things when you need something if you don't need something then you don't do it what what was the world fulfilling that was lacking beforehand that's the big question so the only one answer really that one that logically answers that or someone is perfect and yet he does something anyway then it must be the reason wasn't for them and that's the Jewish answer to the question the purpose of the universe is that God created the world to give that's what it is when you don't need but you do it anyway the universe is God's act of giving and therefore the way we fulfill the purpose of the universe is to receive and to experience the purpose of life therefore now says it straight out is to experience joy that's the purpose of life and joy in our understanding is the world everything's to is this so much there this music and his love and this knowledge and is this food and spices and scents and oceans the swimming mountains to climb it's a varied world of infinite experiences and infinite a lot of experiences and we want to experience as much as possible and in that sense we see our religion Judaism is is Torah is meant to be a guidebook to how to experience totality how to experience joy it's a it's a guidebook to similar and in that context is where this year has to be given so we believe that that the will of Hashem is to be happy the will of Hashem is to be is to is to is to experience pleasure the problem with that kind of talk and what I say this this thing is is that is that people seem to feel like they hear the opposite message all the time just too much desire and desires bad and don't don't look at that and don't do that and how do we reconcile the I'm sure you've all heard many talks that talk about Judaism you know as as joy you know we're not into asceticism we're we're not into celibacy we believe in marriage we we make all of our blessings ever all of our holidays start off with a cup of wine we're not afraid of wine not afraid of intimacy we're not afraid of music we love you know we don't believe in blind faith we believe in knowledge right the first thing we teach Jewish Kansas's that's by the seder we just had passed out of place I don't know if you had a big seder this year unfortunately but but in normal times the first thing in the Seder is we teach the youngest kid to ask the four questions questioning is Jewish because knowledge is the experience of of joy truth and love and beauty all these things Judaism is about joy and people understand that but there's there's the other side that we hear also don't look at this don't go there don't do this and the biggest question of them all this is really what I want to focus my whole class on is people go away that's very nice you know a beautiful speech all life is it's about joy and Torah is just a guidebook you know the experiencing similar and and time logo we call Eden many work we have many words for pleasure it's all well and fine except when you actually open the book and you look inside because the first story in the Torah hits you and you go really what do you do with this story we all know the story the story is a story of the Garden of Eden and God create there's Adam and Eve the first people Adam and Eve are in the garden of eden and there's only one law right the purpose of life is joy God wants you to be happy so he creates one more well what should the law be the law should be be happy but this is the law right what does the law of God says don't is is a beautiful garden with everything and there's one tree in the middle of the garden you can eat that tree there's only one law in the entire Torah for Adam and Eve this is their Judaism their religion their way of serving God one thing don't eat from the tree so let's see this tree right the tree is described as this here is the torah's description of the Cheney bhakti raha Shah keto 4/8 lemarchal if you want to look it up yourself it's chapter 2 of braziers Genesis chapter 2 Paul suc love vi vi vi plus of the sixth verse in chapter 2 dr. Alicia Eve sees Kotova in stomatal the tree is good to eat but he Sava he Lane I am and it's desirable to the lustful PAVA desirable lustful to the eyes when a moderate slash kill next one is appealing come on right now come on the tree is appealing to as lajas killer as a means of enlightenment the fascinating truth she was good to eat it was desirable to the eyes and appealing to the intellect this delicious beautiful and deep three good to eat lustful or beaut or desirable to the and appealing to the intellect as a means of enlightenment maybe so these are the three things so what are those three it sounds like to me that those are the three different pleasures of the world we experience the world in different ways right we we have physical pleasures our eyes our ears sensory pleasures right and good to eat taste delicious and then there's deeper pleasures they're not just sensory but they're the next step it's art its beauty traveling I am desirable to the eye is is is is something loftier it's emotional pleasure it's the pleasure of aesthetics of art of beauty and then after that comes one more level in the mind is there's the physical pleasure of good to eat the emotional pleasure of art and poetry and deeper things and then there's knowledge never ha skill appealing as a means of enlightenment so this tree was physically appealing emotionally appealing and intellectually appealing it basically is the heart the mind mind this is basically if you ask me this is a synopsis of all human pleasure every pleasure you will ever experience is either in the category of good teeth which would include all the physical things good the smell and you know jump in a pole all the physical sensory pleasures and then beautiful look at would include all of those deeper emotional pleasures even to include love but meaning and depth and and all those fascinating poetic experiences and then the third one is intellect is knowledge wisdom justice insight now understanding and there's only one law in the world what's the law the law is do not eat from this tree so how can I sell you my entire introduction of the purpose of life is to experience joy and then God creates Adam and Eve and he says this is your tree what I'm saying is true the way I'm hollow sets up the world is true no basically I be rabbi sensing all of Kabbalah all of cocido - all of or all Jewish thought of all the books that deal with this stuff nobody's selling asceticism we're selling you know I like to think of the world as follows me we say God is one if God is one then what is the world the world is fragments it's diversity we see the world in Judaism as like a puzzle God is the cover of the puzzle box and the world is that picture cut up into trillions of pieces so how are you going to experience beauty if you learn to put all the pieces together and I would have summed up all of the Torah the Torah is basically how to make puzzles which pieces go within other pieces all the different rules first you turn over the cardboard onto the colorful side then we'll sort the colors by matching colors and then we'll start to put it together and then we'll have negative laws don't let the door get any pieces don't let the kids you know take anything off the table everything stays here there's a lot of all of the laws of the Torah we don't break the puzzle or create the puzzle and it's the secret to how to make the world one and the goal is to to to experience the full the full puzzle the joy of everything or change the metaphor puzzle and do it as music the symphony everything in the world was an instrument and our goal is to hear the music to be the conductor the tone well the tour is the conductor of tourism the the the score and how are we gonna put it together that's how how we in Jewish don't look at the world and ever and we actually it's not just every Mitzvah we have a little if you look in many sindorim that there's a little fine print right before V Mitzvah and it says it's called the shame you got the statement of intent before the Mitzvah every statement of intent is all the 613 missiles they were the same intent the intent is the Shamy hood could show brito in order to reunify in order to assemble all the pieces and everyone knows we end we end prayers we leave shoot last prayer Elaine Elaine oldest avocado taco right everyone knows only know what's the final words of Leno bionaire mr via Hashem Linnell a foul caloric biome ha whoo yeah a method sumo sumo sumo record what does that mean and it will be said at the end of days and right by Yo Ma who on that day samatha God will be one and his name will be one see God is always one but his name will be one means that all the pieces will be seen as one there's God in his essence but revealed in the world we call it P word he's revealed fragmented we don't see the connection so Hashem that God is God has always been one who shallow excellent but he's the way you'll be perceived he'll be known as a hood the world itself only come one that's a beautiful picture and and that itself is a it would be a great explanation of why a Jew can't live without aura all right imagine the tragedy and the travesty of having the most beautiful but the most beautiful picture in the universe and present with you as a puzzle and all you think is that someone gave you a box with a thousand colorful pieces of cardboard and you're wondering what were they thinking if in the metaphor of beauty so the puzzle is is the beauty and the tragedy is to have all those pieces and not know that they go together or even to know that they go together not how to do it you put the wrong piece is somewhere and you'll have extra pieces and it won't work then you won't know what you're looking at so this is how we this is this is why the Torah is so important but that's not my class my class is is that's a nice book but so then how come when God actually put this in writing and he if you're proposing that the purpose of life is to put the puzzle together and to create unity and that's the human so then how come God says Adam Eve here's your garden and here's a tree this tree is the joy in his beauty and knowledge and wisdom and love and goodness and everything you ever would have wanted in the universe what should the law have been the law should have been I'm gonna count to three oh shoot the starter pistol and then you devour that tree right go take it enjoy it learn you know have the it's eat what was good and desire what was beautiful and and and explan expand your mind with the appealing to the intellect light up the world feel everything that's what the law should have been so this is the code this is what I want to talk about today I mike shear is how how do we understand the story the two main stories I would say in the Torah right the the creation story this is the culmination of the creation story this is Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and you know a way to say this is is that if you want to know the author you know you want what say you want know one architect right you have a great architect you want to know him so there's two ways to go about it you can study the house that he created well you can study the blueprint of the house and that's how we understand the relationship of the universe and the Torah God wrote two things we have two things from God we have the universe that's his first work that's history operations and then announced Sinai he gave us the Torah so he's the author of two works we believe that the two works are are you know they're they're they're macrocosm microcosm what the Torah is to the world is what the blueprint is to the house so each one serves each other they're not in conflict so we have the story of creation which I'm saying is is is don't eat from this tree and then we have this story frittata which I want to argue is enjoy the world experience everything get married and have children and study and learn and make some money and go on vacations and sing songs and dance and garden and eat and but and then I'm saying that they're both the same and this doesn't fit so how do we answer this question God says the the tree was good to eat beautiful to look at deep to contemplate and he said only from the tree okay so I want to give a little more background information just uh I'm not gonna make it to complicate you want to stay focused so we have the first point which is clear by now right we have a tree it's good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to think about most of the rest of us everyone knows this story the rest of the story you basically know I just want to focus on a little little detail that all become clearer as we go along before Adam and Eve ate from the tree it says even though they weren't wearing any clothing they were in the garden and they were not embarrassed but the reaction from eating from the tree when they actually eat from the tree they become embarrassed they were they knew that VA duque room came they knew that they were naked and they were embarrassed and they went they hope they went to hide in the bushes and then God comes and why are you hiding the evening the tree we know the story and punishes them and he punishes the snake because it was the snake also that's important this was the snake who sort of convinced them somehow the snake sidles up to Eve and he goes Eve like why aren't you eating from the tree is it true that God said you can't eat from all the trees and he says no we couldn't from all the trees only the one in the middle of the garden that's the one we can't eat from and and this thing snake seems fine please this life has no drama he need some whatever he wants and he seems okay and Eve looks at him and here is him talking and he beats in the tree but Eve what and then she gives at him but even Adam realized that when they eat from the tree they get hit by a ton of bricks and they feel ashamed for the first time beforehand they were also says they were naked but they weren't embarrassed but now they were make it in embarrassed so I want I think I want to get a little clarity on on there too all right so so let's talk about this tree I want you to figure now for yourselves if I wish it would be a regular class and I can look in your eyes and you can see when you're getting close but I'm gonna say it slow and I want you to hear it that's when you get it you'll have that flash of recognition it's so cool when you realize how powerful how deep it R is and it's cool when you threw yourself so here's here's the words the tree was good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to think about tovahleh Maho tavola een I am never hostile and God says don't eat from it and Eve took from the tree and she ate from it and she gave to Adam to eat that's a story okay again I know say it one more time oh I don't know what the pointers are saying it on a recording like this but it mean in the group who would that come from different angles but it was good to eat desirable lustful to look at an appealing to the intellect good to eat beautiful to look at deep to think about mouth eyes mine these are my heads and God says don't eat from it look if you got it I don't tell you don't tell anybody because you can't tell anybody that's okay so he's the metaphor algorri if you didn't get it I'm gonna tell you my metaphor this is the tool I use to sort of explain this I have a you know again another thing we don't have now my daughter is engaged she was supposed to get married two days after pestsof but there's no weddings Hassan stuck in Canada and you can't get married without a husband you know we can we can do a lot of stuff and that's that's a little out of the you know the okay weddings no weddings but remember the times when they were weddings there's the wedding begins what we call a smorgasbord the younger kids don't know what it is I when I say in college they go shuang is it a buffet okay it's a fancy but I think it's expensive the thing I have feldheim is rule of smorgasbords okay this is my most important rule of smorgasbords for many women acts don't mean this like in a famine anti-feminist way a sexist way but from many women they don't know fill them swoosh motor sports the men look at me like of course what's feldheim zuluaga sports you know my rule of Schmucker sports does he walk into the smorgasbord you read all these tables and you got lamb chops spareribs and my rule is don't eat the rice we don't eat rice what's the explanation there are people who even eat orzo or quinoa right well why is there a rule don't eat the rice it's not a religious rule don't think like kosher like how come how come I never heard that it's a joke okay it's a joke but I mean it lightly okay don't eat the rice why don't you eat the rice simply because we have a stomach stomachs have this limited real estate in your stomach if you can put a spirit in in one spot and you filled with rice that was a poor allocation of your resources you knew it was a poor expenditure of your area right it's like buying property in Manhattan and building a ranch house you know you can buy them all the sky rides you can build a hundred stories and it's a waste of real estate a waste of money to build a one-story house to put rice where you couldn't put sparerib is is that's my okay feldheim is ruler small disappoints don't eat rice we analyzed my room my is my rule of thou shall not rule over thou shalt rule what am I really saying when I say don't eat the rice missing I'm saying leave large not saying don't eat rice I'm saying don't eat rice but what I'm saying is eat the spirits you're buying a wedding let go enjoy yourself don't don't sell yourself short man be all that you can be don't cop out I go for broke let's say we're sitting by the wedding and we see a guy he's sitting there by the smorgasbord right he's got his plate and he's by the rice and he's looking around he's gone right and he's he's his son right he's shuffling rice into his plate and I'm sitting there with my guys we already have stacks of spirits and what yo what's with that guy with the rice so there's a few theories that we can say to explain why the guys with the rice okay number of one most likely he's from Baltimore most likely see he's been to New York weddings he knows already like these are city people they're gonna they're gonna elbow him out of the line they're gonna step on his shoes he's gonna get his tie stained and even when he finally gets his turn it's just gonna be fat left over so he learned this place he goes to the rice he sits he eats the ice and he'll hope that eventually it'll loosen up the crowd and he'll sneak oh maybe it'll be some meat left over that's why he's by the rice but nobody's gonna say no no one's gonna say you know why the guys by the rice that guy in the party animals by the rice this guy he's a scared he doesn't want to fight with people or maybe his cardiologist is on line and he's look II don't want to give you this card houses or his mother-in-law this his wife is sitting there going don't you dear I see what you're looking at there's a lot of explanations but the one explanation no button will say to the guy who's eating the rice you know what it is he's a collage because the party kind of the guy who wants a live once pleasure the hedonist he's by the meat so when I say don't eat the rice what I'm saying is leave large the smorgasbord you don't I want like right you know this weddings costing you want the host wants you to enjoy yourself the host will be upset when they find out you went home and you had all was the best kin why I ever had that's not gonna make anyone happy okay so so now let's go back to the Garden of Eden okay let's look at God created the world I told you he created the world to give us joy this is this is his magnificent symphony his painting he wants you to hear it all and use every color in your painting and make the puzzle and have music that'll blow your mind he wants you to live he wants to give totality so if that's the case of will Quran it's a varied world this is a smorgasbord the world is the is the buffet this hadith describe it the tree was good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to think about that's a buffet that the buffet is just a metaphor this is the real buffet a buffet of available pleasures a complex world where you have delicious things and then you have deep things and then you have truth and knowledge and wisdom there's justice and there's this being in there's so many there's a it's a buffet and the turret is one rule what does it say don't eat from the tree it was good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to think about then you get it yet what didn't he say he didn't say don't look at it if the scribe didn't say don't think about it the tree is described as having three distinct ways to experience it it was good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to think about and all the Torah says don't eat it it didn't say it's off-limits our entire question was how can you tell me that the world was created for pleasure if God creates the most pleasurable tree in the world and he says no and the answer is he didn't say no he said don't eat from it he described the tree as having three distinct ways to I enjoyed eating looking and thinking and he only forbade eating there's a hierarchy of pleasure not all pleasures are created equal the simplest and lowest pleasures are food or eating animals eat everyone eats then you pay a little more money and you go to a restaurant where the food takes longer and the portions are smaller and you have to give a tip but this presentation and there's lighting and there's a little violin music in the background and it's a it's a deeper experience and just putting the dinner in your in your your from your freezer and right create extra steps you can put the dinner key you can put the frozen food the TV dinner into your oven or you can and I don't know if anyone uses that phrase anymore but I'm hope and then you can go one step up and go to a fast-food restaurant and then you can go to the fancy restaurant but it's all eating this hierarchies and eating but then beyond eating there's go to a museum you can go to a symphony you can go to a concert you can sit down with a guitar and sing some songs with your for music and beauty is much deeper and then beyond music that's also that's great beyond that is truth and wisdom a bird's-eye view of the universe to understand that everything fits that's the real symphony of the world is the intellectual understanding of the symmetry and the balance and the system so the Torah here is describing God creates a garden this is the garden the universe is the garden this isn't the garden the United States isn't the garden earth isn't the garden this is the garden the universe is the garden and we me and you we're Adam and Eve and God put us in the garden he said I want you to dance in my garden I want you to swim in my seas I want you to look at the sunset from the top of my mountains I want you to eat in to smell it and to feel it and to love and to share that's what I want my garden is good to eat beautiful to look at and deep to thinking that there's only one rule don't get stuck by the eating don't eat from the tree when God says don't eat from the tree is not it's not a restriction he's saying don't cabal don't eat the low-hanging fruit look don't get stuck there the animals get stuck there everyone gets everyone eats you you you have you have depths and thoughts you know what you knew you can't begin to imagine the joy that you can possibly experience so from the framework of looking at the world like we describe the purpose of the world as God wants us to have pleasure so from that framework we have a very convenient way to now think of it in the microcosm of the universe of the wedding the sinner is the guy eating the rice because he's a cop-out the purpose of this event was to have joy in uterus eating rice and the table the hero the holy person is the person who's maximizing his experience but of course it's much more complex than that this is just the framework right we can we can imagine that you know the guy who's eating the rice he's really the sadiq compared to his two roommates so we're saying I'm gonna go to the wedding I gotta go bring my suit to the cleaners and there's no parking and like I buy a gift you know you go and you bring me bring me back food you know so now he's the compound the guy who went eating the rice is the hero but our compound who's staying home and he's you know he's watching the movie he's the compound but maybe he's the hero because the other roommate is saying oh my god you're watching that movie it's so long it's like the plot it's complicated and I'm just playing solitaire right and then there's another roommate who can find worse things to do than solitaire right there's an infinite levels of being the guy the guy who is eating the rice compared to the guy who stayed home is he's the hero he's the cop I'm the guy you stayed home he's the hero compared to the guy who's just playing a video game and on the other end the guy eating the meat he's the hero his roommates say don't eat the meat remember going to the gym you wanted a six-pack what are you doing you you wouldn't you undoing all you've done for a month so now the hero who we thought was the hero the guy who was eating the meat he's the cop out and the guy in the as the arrow and then we can grab the guy in the gym and say buddy with the gym what what are you doing in a gym what do you are you a cow like you're you being go to a librarian and get an intellectual 6-pack blow your mind like learn stuff think your stuff out like you know and then the guy in the library the guy is sitting there you can say that's really cool too you know biology no it's really cool you're learning physics and you're learning you know the history of jazz music whatever it's good to know everything knowledge is great but you know what there's something called taurah and taurah is what any piece of knowledge that you're learning it's what the conductor is to the symphony and to let's look at the world from the corner from one little corner and to see one thing you miss even now you got it you know the value of your mind you know the value of truth so why stop by a niche take the blinders off and see the global bird's eye view have the thrill of the symphony understand the entire you sit back you can cry when you realize what this world is and the perfection and what went into writing this score that's that's Torah but we're not done let's let's we talked about nakedness and shame I want to go back and look at that this is a garden this is meant for you to enjoy that was the intention of everything beforehand they were naked and not embarrassed the snake wasn't embarrassed and he was naked and they eat from the tree goes the snake said what you can eat from everything you want when he already what's all these restrictions and they eat from the tree and then they're naked and they're embarrassed so I wanted to understand what does that mean what is what is embarrassment could we define what embarrassment is what is shame why did they go hide and what does it mean to be naked so again we should work this out together but that's not the way we do things on these kind of in the corona age another the thrill of self-discovery in Torah on the class is also another victim of this disease but we'll do it like this I think naked is natural natural means just to be nothing fake no lies right the best example would be a tie right right time is just doing anything it doesn't do anything it's just there you know it's I have a top button it doesn't even call the button close it's a it's a lie it's it's worthless you know we have climate control there's heat there's air conditioning we need clothing for right that's what these natural ists you know and they it would say like just be right there's an honesty and just being so before Adam and Eve had that they eat from the sin they were just were they were complete they were being themselves what happened when they ate from the trees let's understand what Shane is also when I say shame in the Torah talk about shame it's not talking about secondary shame secondary Seamus I'm embarrassed in front of you that's that's that is shame I'm ashamed it was laughing at me they're rolling their eyes that shame right by the way how I'm a little ashamed about the here I just want it that's Jewish law when you're in mourning you can't get haircuts anyone knows even before right uh the halacha is that normally for 30 days in mourning you can't shave or get a haircut and for a father or a mother for a parent it's long until people tell you that you're looking to shuffle the rabbi you need a haircut so rabbi Feltham at gmail if you think I'm the shoveled my barber is waiting for me all right yeah so we're explaining the difference between primary shame the my words and secondary shame primary shame is myself that I can't look myself in the mirror I know what I did I know that I'm I I didn't really earned this you know that's you know pride is the opposite is women what I have is mine I paid for it I earned it no shortcuts when you took shortcuts are you cheated there wasn't really yours and you can't really enjoy it you know the the kid who works all summer and mows lawns and delivers papers and does all this stuff and he buys himself for this $800 this rusty car he found in the newspaper he loves his car he sits he gets his friends rights and he's too happy he sits in what was his car his friend who sees how popular he is cause he has a car and this kids a rich kid or whatever he steals a car even better he goes to the next town he's jealous he goes he steals a Cadillac shiny Cadillac and now everybody goes to his car and they're driving in his car and he's the new guy and this guy has nobody so this guy is driving around he has a party but when he comes home at night and no he drops all his friends off he can't sit in this car and go my car no it's coming our first guy he could have no money left for gas you could be broke but he can come home at night and he can sit in his car and just just be mrs. Carly paid for it cuz it's his when you pay for something you earn it that's real when you cheated your why then you can't really look yourself in the mirror you know so so what we do then is is we surround ourselves with other people who don't know my contents and I live my life through how I look in their eyes we have this social contract you know I think you are the man and you go no no no rabbi you're the man you're the man and you know we're doing the end we we we agree we're the men that's a social contract I don't call you out you don't call me out right the fact that I can drink better than anyone else I can hold my alcohol or I'm the biggest party animal that's that's what I wanted to be and now I'm really a success the fact that I was 10 years old I was jumping or furniture with a towel tied around my neck and I was gonna save the world so that ship sailed I'm no hero anymore I've compromised too much I've so what I have to do is I had to lose all my friends that I had then and not see those guys who remember my real team surround myself with a new group of friends who tell great a.m. that's what we do this is a mask of my personal shame and I can sit at home at night when it's too quiet and when there's no nervous and I think about the truth I need noise I need stimulation I need distraction but then when somebody says something it makes fun of me in front of the other guy is my new friends and they laugh at me so now I'm ashamed but it's at secondary shame what happens is it just peeled off my mask and now I'm forced to deal with my true shame so when we talk about shame we don't mean shamed in front of others there's a long way of showing it but we're talking about shame what we mean is is that I'm ashamed to look myself in the eyes personal shame that's the real shame the other one is just I found the workaround I found a way to forget what I felt about myself III took selfies about what I was eating when I was doing and you said oMG and I get everything was good as long as I'm getting my OMGs or jealousy or even better hatred if you hate me because I'm so successful and I can forget that I'm not successful why does a little why do they hate me well complicated where we're complicated beings but what happens is is is the laughter or what I'm exposed in front of my friends I lose my mask and now I'm back to my shame so what it says in the Garden of Eden that Adam and Eve fell chain they felt essential shame primary shame shame shame without qualifiers okay so my definition for shame is shame is the feeling you feel when you you're not living up to your own truths you're the judge of your values you're judging yourself by your own standards there's nothing more real than that this is what you believe by your own standards you've let yourself down that's the something I've seen so you didn't okay shame is the feeling you feel when you don't live up to what you knew you should have been what you knew you were capable of what your own conceptions of your potential was that's what we say so when when you're being real then you have no shame because you're living who you are shame is when you're no longer when you're exposed that's when you realize that you're naked naked was when when I'm being me but when there's a a disconnect between who I really am and what I'm exposed to a set will see when that Adam and Eve are in the garden and they see this beautiful world it's it's this is delicious it's beautiful of its deep and the snake is living in the road he's eating he's slithering around and he's it's all hunky-dory he's the happiest guy it's all fine no drama no eggs no plz this is great all of a sudden snakes his teeth what's what you want you eating it she goes can't eat so this snake says why couldn't you can't eat you just just just do it what do you mean who's raining on your parade why didn't he just just be and Eve eats him the tree and she gets hit by a ton of bricks Adam and Eve a ton of bricks they feel shame why did they feel shame when they eat from the tree now we understand because shame is when you don't live up to your standards when you're capable of something the tree with the universe is about eating and knowledge and truth and death deep things when g-eight what did she do she sold herself short it was a cop-out she didn't live up to who she who she was people being shame is the feeling you feel when you don't live up to your standards the reason why the snake was fine is because the snake doesn't have a concept of shame all the snake has is the ability eat there is no concept of beauty he doesn't have an artistic sense he doesn't have the ability to see appearance eye view and go out the world's mind-blowing he doesn't have that so when an animal eats an animal is walking around that he's being himself he's naked and he's fine with it but when a human being lives like the animal and he eats and stops there then he feels shame because he's not living up to what he was meant to be that's that is the shame of humanity this is what the Torah is talking about it's such a it's it's a we we started with the story it was a story of pleasure that God said don't get pleasure and that fits with what we understand religion to me that's the the negative take religions a bunch of thou shalt nots Puritan restrictions God wants you don't smile don't don't don't live too large don't look don't hear but we're saying is Judaism is look and see and know the only thing that are ruining is if you feel broken and dirty and ashamed and then you're gonna spend your life hiding in the bushes the secret of coming out of the bushes and dancing in the garden is to be unashamed to be to be who you really are and that means not the combat when human beings don't live up to their own dreams and own expectations you feel shame so god only gives me mankind one rule this is a universe it's a smorgasbord it's great just what happens is if you take a shortcut and you eat the low-hanging fruit and you don't live up to your own dreams you're gonna feel low you're gonna feel dirty and you're gonna be ashamed you're gonna go hide in the bushes and you're gonna miss out on the Magnificent garden like create a few and that sin sin is not to be who you could you're the judge you establish it this is the tragedy and this is the most beautiful story now the deepest thing the story of this tree see God doesn't say then you can never eat from the tree by the way right we know on Shabbos they would have been allowed no hug beating would have been allowed because you can have rice as a side dish it's great with the gravy from the right from the meat it's even better like that but to just stop and eat the rice and to stop there to go to the first thing you have and the stock at the the first the first available pleasure you see what's wrong with instant gratification there's nothing wrong with instant gratification it's great the only thing wrong with instant gratification is if I give you a few options instant gratification easiest gratification most gratification what should you choose you choose maximum gratification not the instant one of the easiest one the value isn't quick or or or or easy the value is what's the best the only thing wrong with instant gratification is if it's not the best then why are you selling yourself short and then you'll know yourself and the real problem is that you'll know you yes you will suffer from selling so short but you'll suffer more from knowing that you sold yourself short and you won't live with that balance in your step you know you won't once you took shortcuts you don't look at yourself the same way children are giddy and giggly and they're bouncing off the walls right there's nothing more liven happening the kid was they didn't feel shame yet because everything was wonderful they haven't lied to themselves and cheated themselves and lowered their standards they dream and they're waiting for their dreams when we eat from the rice of our lives that's when we sell ourselves short and it's a complex world and this is this is this is why do study total see we know you see this this whole lesson I just thought you could have been taught very well if the tree would have been described as good to eat and deep to think about now the Torah would say is is don't just eat doing a bigger thing think and then you'll feel good or you'll do this the snake Annie Percy doesn't have options he's not ashamed human beings are capable of more don't compare you by the way that's why God takes away metaphor the legs and the snake he's saying I got the punishment the snake you know had legs look like a human now to the snake what God is saying is I don't want you to mix up even yourself with the animal kingdom don't look at animals and say it looks so happy eating I took away their legs what that means is God is saying that you know you can't make them Catholic and animal that gives you the snake has no shame because that's all he can do you're capable of more and the second you do less you'll know it and then we're ruling you rob you of the bounce in your step in the giddiness and you'll never giggle again you'll you know you'll you'll have that that that cackle that sarcastic sneering laugh that people use to make fun of the innocent happy people right once you've given up when you when you when you when you when you shamed you when you become a shame then and you lost your dreams and you have to learn to laugh but it's a different laughs nobody mixes up the get-go and the cackle total wants us to giggle in the garden forever you know big families will giggling together you know and maybe have a more poetic metaphor but but here's what I want well I wanted to say that this three levels of the tree it's a little more complex it could have just been eating and thinking what's why the three levels like the lesson that I just taught you would have been taught if the tree was good to eat deep to think about and God says don't eat think but it gives you three levels because it's a middle stage there's a stage of what you're into beauty and art you know and and then you don't feel the shame of eating because you really see we see this as the story of Greece the Greek civilization was the first outside of the Jewish people was the first in the larger world to get past eating the Greek conquered Persia Persia was the Purim story Aakash they rose with his feast Persia is considered to be in Jewish thought the culmination of Tova of eating just hedonism and then the Greek the Greek came and they conquered Persia and they took the world the first nation of the world to to go past sort of defeat the failed mistake and not to cave in the tree of knowledge and just eat and they the Greeks walked around with a certain measure of pride because they were into beauty and architecture and Olympics they were deeper and they weren't just eaters and there's a value of degrees but we had all over with them over Hanukkah because we understand that same way beauty is superior to eating and the person who goes to the Art Museum and is involved with art and music will have a spring in a step compared to the guy who just eats we know that ultimately that will be shamed you will be shamed too because the UN being is capable of nikamoda hostile appealing to the intellect and true knowledge and the bird's-eye view of the world and if all you're busy with this art so the same what what what art is to the food is what knowledge is heart and that's Torah and this is the blessing that Noah gave to his son llaves the father of Greece you know the story right Nowak was naked and his son covered him up and he blessed him and he said yeah fess I'm gonna give you beauty but you should dwell in the tents of your brother Shane yeah this is the father of your van of grease and Shane is the father of the Jewish people and the blessing that Noah gave to shake that - hum that the office was you'll have beauty and you're gonna have a spring in your step sort of but you better go to the tents of shame you better learn about truth because truth is the real journey and if you just get stuck in beauty you will also feel shame where Jewish peers person is eating we're not good at fraternities it has a very short short shelf life the drinking and the partying the Jewish kids I meet in schools they they know they got to get out of there quickly and then they make their way and they make a little bit of money and they start to buy art or whatever it is but doesn't last the only thing that works for agile is Torah and even knowledge outside of Torah you can become a scientist and it'll work for a while but unless you understand the knowledge of all knowledge how everything works unless you hear the symphony of the universe you will never walk with that true balance in your step and that was the purpose of creation that we should walk dance in slow motion in the garden barefoot with rose petals whatever we can trust Hollywood to draw our picture for us but but not to draw the path the picture you can visualize it from your movies but the path only exists in Torah and the path is is this smorgasbord don't eat from the tree don't even pursue the beauty go for truth and then you can have the beauty and the rice - and the food you can sit by a shot of this table as long as you get the Torah reading and you talk about toe reading you can sing your songs need your food and you can have it all but you gotta first go to the and make sure you don't get stuck this is the story of the Garden of Eden but more so it's the story of Mount Sinai the two bookends of history the Garden of Eden lays out the the world that is a wedding of feasts of everything and everything available and we know that the highest thing is next model oscul appealing to the intellect and now inside lining is all that was appealing to the intellect the knowledge of knowledge the goal of life is to dance in your garden when we talk about to be or not to be that's the question that's a question nobody but everyone needs stands that question nobody wants to not be the real question is to be or to be are you gonna be satisfied with eating is that being or are you a being are you gonna experience the world with vibes of perfection and that's man signing leave Leave approach Lewis with this mindset that God has given us a gift of joy and the worst thing is that image of that religion is here to restrict us it is the guide to fullness when I tell my leave you with this image I spent a lot of time a college student so what I tell my students you think that I'm telling you don't go to the club because we don't want you to enjoy yourself the total only wants you enjoy yourself when I tell you to stop with the clubs because nobody ever went to a club to enjoy themselves you're going there because every year they get darker and louder it's a place to hide from what you really wanted where you always dreamt of because you're giving up and that's what the Torah is telling us is don't you don't want to be hiding in the bushes out of shame because you ran away from your own dreams except accepting of the Torah on Mount Sinai the accepting of a Torah that we do unto us is the accepting of the tool that allows us to live life where we can one day sit on top of them their alliance we can marry off our youngest child and plop down on the couch with our smells and lean back broke and sore and tired and look at each other look what we did he's nothing better and everybody understands how someone could be sore and broke on a couch and considered that the top of the mountain but I think they don't they all understand that they does that like they don't understand that because they we wouldn't need so many hiding places in the world if people really understood it climb the mountain of Mount Sinai received your Torah our Torah and dance at this wedding feast you know you know even if you could limit it to ten people or 50 people whatever the restrictions are this is a dance you can do by yourself you can sit there you don't you don't need anyone else you can sit like I said I learned Torah I could sit and I could see sometimes I just look at myself have this I'm happy knowing so means I just start smiling out of nowhere it's just to know that everything works and make sense that's Jewish joy it's everyone's joy but we have it we have enjoy it have a beautiful young to receive your Torah thank you for being here