Living With Emunah (Part 326) - Don't Beat Yourself Up or Get Stuck

good morning B welcome back to living with amuna wonderful to see friends again coming together to learn and work on and grow our amuna muscles and see the world through our amuna glasses and feel the presence of Hashem even more in our lives I want to thank our amuna Siri sponsors Dr zavi and Bella Morgan in memory of RAB Dr Brian galet and in memory of her mother Dr Ellen chanza we're very very grateful to the Morgans this morning is also sponsored by the sadasi family benon sadasi by syia bro in honor of the 22nd year site of her husband as Ben benam is alah by tractenberg and andrean alen liberman for the of Esther bashaa please got a speeda by Brew p and family for Thea of her mother y Bas should also please God have a speedy Rua sha okay got a flurry of emails I love all the amuna listeners our amuna community our amuna movement oruna World each and every email I read each and every email inspires me motivates me and moves me and each and every email I wish I could share but we'll have to do it over time keep sending keep sending them I don't know somebody suggested maybe we collect these emails anonymously without a name and one day do a book we intersperse the amuna Torah teachings with the emails divided into different chapters people are struggling or amuna in different airports will be the longest chapter but we'll have other chapters as well maybe one day so keep sending in those emails and don't worry if we ever did that it would be anonymous and with the permission and so on and so forth so don't hesitate to send an email now because you're afraid it's going to make it in a book good morning from London Rabbi Goldberg Yeshua I sat down to DAV one morning and it first for me I decided to do a few extra minutes of isas by reaching out and connecting to Hashem so a person needed something they were struggling and for the first time they decided the way that they would show their initiative is by ding for a few extra minutes it is not my way it is not my go-to way of connecting as I find daving difficult but I'm working on it following that and before starting work I Googled Amun and yours came up in Spotify I told you I owe Spotify a huge finders fee or Shad fee Spotify is what's building this community imagine my absolute thrill in the first 10 minutes of the first year I randomly picked was exactly about Mr louing the person who takes an extra minute to DAV and how important it is to make an effort with Hashem to my absolute Delight a few minutes later you randomly mentioned retinal tear and waking up one morning without sight and being grateful for everything we have once again this was directly applicable for me it was a beautiful hug from hasem telling me I'm headed in the right direction thank you for being the hear somebody waking up with an eye problem a retina problem for whatever random reason random reason we mentioned retina problem let us see what a miracle you woke up this morning and there were no floaters and it wasn't uh blurry and you could see straight wow thank you it's not a given it's God forbid a person who wakes up and can't see straight that all of a sudden makes that BR with a lot more so yet again Spotify I is the amuna picking out the right sheum for the right people his next name has a little bit tough dear by Goldberg 23 years old I made Aliyah by myself from certain community at age 19 I learned in Yesa for two years and then I drafted into the IDF during my shanet I first heard your six minute sitter snippet Shum and since then I've been hooked for the period leading up to my draft during eight months of grueling training a year of active service during which I met my wife and then the war I've been listening to the Amun on the way to or from BAS during or runs or just at home throughout these almost four years I have tons of amuna stories to share which I will one day slowly be sending you as I write them out but just to tell you just to explain to you where I am now and where I've been my wife loaded a few living with Amun to an MP3 player to take with me to the war and I listen to them on first of all it feels like the totally unworthy but wow to think that ins some MP3 player device some Soldier loaded the weapon and loaded the MP3 player with amuna lessons and the weapon loaded with guns and the MP3 player loaded with Amun shuram was ready to go off to the Battlefront what an image what a Jewish people M our soldiers our soldiers I don't want to speak negatively about Ukrainian soldiers or soldiers from any other country I don't know are they loading up Amun are they loading up classes about faith I'm sure sure maybe some religious personalities and figures are but how many of our soldiers incredible incredible people these are our people as I listened hearing stories of faith during the war stories of soldiers and their famili stories of support and love for am Israel I had tears streaming down my face in Gaza believing in the not yet hoping and knowing I was hasem to make the world better and brighter that I was under his k the wings of his presence I experienced an extremely uplifting period of amuna where I was able to be strong and so full of faith in God that I was able to smile through months and months of war death and destruction now I've been released from the Army after two years and eight months I like hundreds and hundreds of soldiers and normal people have been through a very long difficult year through and's divine intervention I was able to keep my head high throughout some of the hardest moments of my life I'm writing to share with you that now my head isn't held high I'm going through a hard dark time where B feels far for me and the only way I can hold on to it is mamish by my fingernails my heart finds it hard to feel that same trust that I felt in so long even though my head knows it to be true I know intellectually hasm is with me I know intellectually he's with me in this pain and that it is all from him and all part of his plan but it doesn't make it easy once again I draw from the sh from the letters when you talk about not yet even though my mind knows that things will get better it hasn't penetrated my heart yet but I know it will I know it must I know that Hashem is guiding this all with love I look forward to sharing more of my journey and the crazy moon experiences I've been through but this felt like an important prologue to begin with thank you for everything you do for the support group support so many the tum groups which I'm quite sure have impacted mine and my friends lives hope also one day to be able to share these stories with you in person all the best your fan and tomed I'm his fan and his tomed what an incredible letter and it breaks your heart I want you to know and this is not the Amun here topic but I've written about and I feel so incredibly uh strongly about from the bottom of my heart the PTSD and the the consequences of this war we don't begin to know and understand and if we think we had to dig into our pockets to provide through duffel bags and Barbe on bases that was scratching the surface and that was only the beginning of what is to come we need to DAV for and send love to and be prepared to underwrite the mental health and the healing of a nation of a Nation this is a soldier thank God not physically injured married now released gone home but you feel his pain through those words through those words and he stri he had amuna he has auna he's struggling with amuna he's desperate for and he deserves all of our love support and we're going to have to step up I'd say when the time has come but the time has come time has come to organize the same way that we have so many organizations and atalah and all the all the uh ways that we're able to support physically we have to be there to support okay from a heavy one to a lighter one Rabbi I've never done a nice bath before but hopefully you won't stop reading now for what it's worth I'm interested in trying one day he had me at ice bath okay which is why he wrote it my wife and I recently visited Morocco on vacation our first day there was there of chabas turned out to be very hectic and un vacation like about 30 minutes before candle lighting I ran down to the ATM outside of the hotel to take out local currency we'd be needing it right after shabas naturally the ATM ate my debit card when I ran over to the bank with my Google Translate app at hand to let them know they casually respond that it happens all the time not to worry since someone will be coming Wednesday to open it up at which point we be on our way back to America unsure what else to do with minutes until shabas I went to our hotel room to plug in the BL to eat up our dinner when of course the circuit blew and the power in the room went out no cash bank card power in our room or time left to spare before L benching we speedily lit and went out to find the Sho which was3 miles away according to my printed out map I still had time in the 18 minutes so I carried the map with me figuring I would deposit at Sho when we got there I showed the bell boy where we needed to go on the map he told me to walk a couple minutes down the street turn and we'd be there only problem was he pointed at us in the wrong direction after several minutes of walking we're clearly lost there's M between my my wife and I how many times we stopped to ask people how to get there but we did agree on it being more than 10 times at this point the 18 minutes were up it was dark we were lost on chabas in Morocco to top it off I was a little worried my black and white with a baseball cap might possibly give away my identity as a Jew perhaps the locals might notice me pointing over and over to a place that said synagogue on the map needless to say for better or worse I Justified carrying the map of the sh sh trumped all in that moment no a but it was lifesaving for the next hour we circled the city looking for the sh we're pretty frustrated and tired but then it hit me I turned to my wife and rhetorically asked you know what re Goldberg would say right now with full disclosure we don't discuss your teachings much with each other so there is no way I could have seen this coming without any hesitation whatsoever she goes you're never stuck you're always where you're meant to be it was just too perfect I wish we had it on camera I wouldn't classify this as one of those happy ending stories as it still quite took us quite a while to find the sh which was obviously over by that point with many wrong turns along the way I can however truly say we both felt tremendous comfort realic in a tough and scary time thank you for the inspiration okay and on that note got this great one re Goldberg I don't know if you remember I'm the daughter of so and so married to such and such I listen to the living room the moon every week I just turned off my car when I walked into HomeGoods and I saw the following picture at HomeGoods you can buy hang on your wall you are exactly where you need to be so I got to go to HomeGoods for only 9.99 no the organizer says no HomeGoods what's the matter with the organiz the HomeGoods you are exactly where you need to be for only $9.9 maybe we maybe we'll make one and brand it with the amuna logo you are where we need to be okay never mind home sorry HomeGoods never mind easy come easy go anyway you are where you need to be let's do one or two quick ones and then we'll get to our learning dear hope this finds you well I'm recent listening to your living with the m has completely changed my outl on stressful situations last week on M shabas my sister and I decided to go on a shopping trip just the two of us planned in advance as we had three children each shops we were headed to is about a half hour from our home as we approached the ramp up to the car park let me translate because this is from London a car park is a parking lot yeah as we were approaching the ramp up to the car park my newly serviced car just conked out out of the blue and I was blocking a long line of cars coming in some kind people helped me move the car to the side and I called AA Services car mechanics who said they'd be their earliest in 2 hours time at 10 p.m. we decided we might as well put a sign in the car we were waiting for AA go shopping instead of waiting in the freezing car we went about our shopping and exactly as the shop closed the help arrived my sister and I both stressy people by Nature remained calm and laughing throughout the annoying ordeal we said to each other how perfect it was that although the car died out of nowhere and would end up costing a fortune we still managed to do our shopping and had a nice time if the mechanic had come quicker as we usually want we would have had to wait in the cold not gone shopping would feel we wasted the night the mechanic also noted I was anxious about the car dying again on the way home so he kindly offered to follow us back home to make sure we were okay turns out my sister and I both started listening to the she recently decided to see that help come exactly the time and the kindness of strangers as a wink and hug from Hashem thank you for the shiur okay okay one more we live in Israel my husband was in Orlando for a conference it was Wednesday morning as I am finishing this email to you and I started it last night before going to bed last night's email husband just finished a conference in Orlando and needs to connect to JFK to catch his flight back to Israel can't have no airport or flight Story the flight from Orlando is delayed at this point I'm hoping he's going to make his flight at 11:50 from JFK I started looking at flights and saw there's not available allow flights out of the us until the sun 22nd if he misses his flight the visualizations were going on and on but wait Hashem has him where he needs to be this point it's 11:20 p.m. she's writing the email as the night's going on I know I need a good night's sleep we shouldn't stay up tracking flights there's nothing else I can do so I put on living with amuna hoping to listen to a good flight story and last week's class came up about breathing so I tried that I figured maybe Hashem just needs me to breathe when the class finished the next class Spotify put on was class number 311 and the first story was an airport story and you said the following words quote we're never stuck we're exactly where we need to be amuna heals us anxiety doesn't help it only sabotages our success and happiness after I do my is all to Hashem let go and let God I sent this to my husband this deed there's nothing else I can do Hashem will work it out I went to bed no anxiety no panic attack just sleep email continued Boer to this morning I woke up 6:30 a.m and saw the following message from my husband bar hasem takes amazing care of us he brought me from the plane to baggage claim to check in within 25 minutes in good time and I'm going to the gate the L flight ended up being delayed by 42 minutes is currently in route like you say the story ended up nicely but the personal win was I was able to let go and let God thank you Hashem for orchestrating orchestrating Spotify for letting me listen to the exact words I needed to hear when I needed them thank you again Spotify amazing so grateful too Spotify let go let God we're exactly where we need to be we all know the messages somehow some reason you keep coming back because we all need to hear it each and every week you need to listen and hear it again and again and again because we may know it up here but it doesn't always filter down here when we find ourselves in those stressful situations panicking and we we sometimes don't know what's going to be last last week there was somebody visiting who was here for a short time and I really wanted to help meet an administrator at a local school as a possibility for their future I couldn't get through the administrator and the schools were really closed that administrator was out of time and out of town and I wasn't connecting and this person was stressing and was going to leave and I didn't know what to do because I really wanted to help this person and I was taking care of I was going not taking care I the privilege of going out with my grandchild and after we went to the park they wanted ice cream I said where do you want to go they said carll so I went to carll but did you know that on Thanksgiving morning Carell's closed so went to Carell Carell was closed I said where do you want to try next they said menes I said okay so we went to menes and as we pulled up to menes an administrator from that school was leaving menes to get in the car and I said wow Hashem put me here right now can you help me can you help this person can I make the connection they said absolutely sure it'd be my greatest pleasure again a little wink a little nod a little hug all that frustration why aren't I getting through why isn't the person calling me back why did I drive all the way to Carell and it's closed what's the point puts you we wake upem leads our footsteps we don't know which ice cream store are our grandchildren going to choose will they be open will they be closed where is he leading to next you know men she's cost but anyway that's another point that scale wow anyway so everyone needs to make a living but Hashem takes us where we need to be at the moment we need to be there he leads our footsteps to where we're meant to go back okay this is a difficult concept and not everybody agrees to it I want to make the disclaimer not every opinion the beauty of Torah is that there are sh and Tora 70 Paths of Torah we have a multiplicity of perspectives and opinions and approaches not everyone is for everyone this is one some find it very comforting and empowering Others May struggle with it but this is more of a and approach to the issues of amuna believes the following on the bottom left of page Zion of page seven in this essay in this new he says means that your heart should be confident and sure that not only that which happens to us is from Hashem but that which we choose that which we elect that which we initiate also urged pushed encouraged led us to that conclusion a year a Jew has to live with no regret now that doesn't sound very Jewish no guilt no regret no shame in an unhealthy way it can be debilitating I don't mean Jewish guilt and shame that's debilitating but I mean isn't chuva isn't isn't self-improvement Chua isn't that all about reviewing reflecting our past where did I go wrong where did I come up short what mistakes did I make how can I learn how can I improve how can I change how can I do better what do you mean I'm not responsible or accountable for anything aren't relationship is all about so my spouse is upset at me can't believe you put your sex socks next to the hamper again can't believe you didn't the toilet seat I can't believe you didn't to put the dishes in the sink he say honey I understand why you're upset I get why you're frustrated it wasn't me Hashem made me put the socks next to the hamper I go to the Amun and said that it wasn't me it wasn't me honey you didn't pick up the dry cleaning again I don't have shirts to wear sweetie it wasn't me hashm made me not go to the dve aren't relationships the core of all relationships accountability responsibility regret learning apology remorse reconciling improving repairing this is the foundations the bread and butters the begin of our relationships what does this mean so says that a who lives with needs to know that we do learn and we do grow we do improve we do take responsibility but we don't beat ourselves up we don't knock knock ourselves down we don't go backwards and get stuck in the past in a way that we can't get out in a way that we can't move forward you know who got stuck in the past you know who couldn't move forward I don't remember if I said it in this year or a different or a different one A few weeks ago you know who got stuck who got stuck who wasn't supposed to turn around and she did when Lo's wife turned around and looked at sto and destruction and she had Nostalgia she wanted to go back there maybe she had regret why did we ever live there and the Torah tells us God said I'm saving you look forward what's next the next chapter of your life Your Best Is Yet To Come the best version of you you haven't yet met your future is in front of you don't turn around don't look back don't get debilitated don't get stuck don't replay don't have remorse don't think about what you could have done differently go forward what does Lo's life will do she can't help it she turns around Salt is a preservative salt makes you stuck it preserves you and exactly where you are you're stuck but a y is never stuck we're moving we're always in motion we're in transit I'm Mak my footsteps we're always going forward so you never turn around you never get stuck and that's what is saying takes you to the point that you say I'm gonna learn from it I'm sorry I forgot your dry cleaning I feel bad that you feel that I don't care about you because I forgot it I came up with the new system to remember I'm not going to forget again but you know what I'm not going to do be filled with shame and guilt and knock myself down and get debilitated and be paralyzed because I'm going to look back and I'm G to say to myself for whatever reason Hashem meant for me to make a mistake that I'll learn from so we don't deny it's a mistake we don't deny that we need to learn from it but we look back and reflect with a recognition that for whatever reason Hashem had me make a mistake that I need to learn from I'm learning from it and now we're going forward V let's go we're going forward we're going forward and such an attitude and such a mentality you'll live a life with a Serenity and a quiet and a peace of mind so many people are so stuck in the past they're replaying things from decades ago let alone years ago months ago or weeks ago if only I shouldn't have dated that person married that person made that decision reacted that way made that choice you can't go backwards in time you can't undo the past don't forfeit the present because you're stuck in the past learn from it Grow from it be accountable for it and then recognize that Hashem for whatever reason meant for you to have made that choice and a person who's willing to let go when you're willing to let go to that shame to that guilt to that turning around to that being stuck you live with this peace with this Serenity I've shared with you before you know I have the privilege privilege the honor to speak publicly multiple times every day and I often have notes and I often write things out I often think things through and even with that afterwards I said I forgot that story I forgot that quote I forgot that line I should have ended it this way this was such a better way to walk it off and in the past all of mus I wouldn't be paying attention to one word I'm saying in M maybe with that Talus over my head all I'm doing is beating myself up you left that out you could have finished this way be such a better speaker why'd you leave that out you can't get a chance to go back now you know what happens I say I forgot that and then I say okay Hashem didn't mean me to say it okay maybe I'll learn from it put it in my notes more clearly use a yellow highlighter whatever I need to learn from it to not leave it out again but now I Let Go mus a beautiful mus I don't think about it a second time because I've changed my whole perspective to say if I forgot to say it Hashem didn't mean for me to say it and not not only do I not feel bad about it now I see it as part of a master plan I was part of fulfilling that master plan I didn't go against it that was the master plan that was the master plan we live by the way that's true again for me that's my profession public speaking but whatever your profession whatever it is that happened you're meant to have not enough salt in the dish we were meant to be late to carpool that day you were meant for again I got to set an earlier alarm I got to get out of bed I got to go to sleep earlier I have got to get a nice bed whatever the thing I have to do that's right whatever the thing I have to do to change my lifestyle again I'm not I'm not advocating a life where no one's responsible or accountable for anything I don't want to live in that world I don't want to have that family I don't want to be among those friends I want to live in a world where people are accountable people take responsibility people learn from mistakes but where we all have calmness and serenity because we're not stuck in the past we're not living with regret we're not beating ourselves up with debilitating shame and guilt and we're not stuck with this endless regret and remorse and and beating ourselves up with why we did it the way we did if you see a person who Stu who's paralyzed who debilitated in the past who can't stop reliving the past can't stop trying to relive the past that person is missing amuna because when you live with amuna when you see and feel the presence of Hashem when you know he's involved and by our side and part of every decision every choice every Behavior every action then you don't get stuck amuna is how we get unstuck amuna is the triaa within London apparently is double A but America is always super sized the portions are always smaller in London than they are in America so we have triaa Tri that's not an insult that's a healthier way of being I'm going to London soon so I have to be careful I can't insult it's a healthier way smaller portion sizes but we're bigger portion size we have AAA they have double A so amuna is the Triple A when you're spiritually emotionally stuck it's the tow truck Amun is the tow truck to get us outle us out get us on the road again get us on the road again person of knows even the mistakes we caused for oursel this is the hard part it's the parts that some people struggle with even the mistakes we cause to ourselves say it's my fault I'm the who didn't stop for gas even though the light went on five miles ago and now I'm stuck on the side of the robe with no gas so imagine you'll say to your spouse wasn't me has wanted us to be stuck your spouse will say hey amuna buddy it was you I've been poking you in the shoulder for the last five miles telling you tough guy why do you have to play this game and challenge yourself and see how far you could take it like every guy how low you can go on the gas level you knew this was going to happen I've been telling you for 20 years it's gonna happen it finally happened what are you blaming Hashem you're the you're the idiot well what are you doing so no he is a he is an idiot and he should learn from it and for now on some people don't know this some people never got this memo do you know that that you're allowed to get gas even before the tanks [Laughter] unempty could be when I drive someone else's car in my family whenever I need it it's always almost un empty I always say you know it's allowed you're allowed the way home from car from shopping you have a couple minutes you pass a gas station the Tank's half full it's okay you're allowed people don't know that so here's a memo Public Public Service Announcement you're allowed to fill the car even before it's unempty it's worth coming just for that so yeah this on the side of the road needs something needs to learn fill the car even before it's unempty should he regret that this time now he's on the side of the road no because even when Hashem puts a moronic thought in our head we need to know we're accountable responsible you're gonna have to be buying a lot of flowers a lot of chocolate a lot of cards to apologize to your wife who stuck with you on the side of that road for being that there accountability there's responsibility there's remorse there's regret there's learning from it and then there's the amuna bow on top which is but for whatever reason I was meant to make this mistake and learn from it whether it's something we did something we said do you know how many people struggle with beating themselves up and knocking themselves down for having the wrong thoughts not action or speech just having the wrong thoughts insecurity lack of self-confidence self-criticism so many people are stuck they're making mistakes the mistake not in action the mistake not in speech the mistake is how many people are stuck no one in their life would actually would would would know because they don't have access to where these mistakes are being made but it's all from learn break out get the help take the ifs seminar which has been fantastic part two is now done read the book grow understand your parts the selft talk unburden unbind them but it's all from Hashem the and here we get to a famous vort famous because I happen to know it of the the learned the following the medish tells us our Rabbi say appears par and this comes from a of says Wicked people are filled with regret Wicked people evil people mistaken people are filled with regret asked a great question Wicked people are always filled with regret well if they have regret for their mistakes then they're righteous they're not Wicked why are you calling them Wicked that they're filled with regret I don't know if I met somebody who was always feeling bad about the mistakes they've made I'd say wow you're righteous you're a sadic you're not Wicked you're not a Russia not a Russ says teaches a law you're allowed to get married based on a condition so if I walk up to a woman and I propose to her and I say you're hereby married to me on condition I'm wealthy if the condition is met then the marriage takes place if the condition is not met then it doesn't what if someone walks up to someone else and says you're hereby married to me betroth to me on condition that I'm a sadic I'm righteous Russia someone overhears it and says you're righteous I just saw you coming out of McDonald eating a cheeseburger with no yaka onum Kipper what are you talking about your righteous what are you talking about you're righteous so are they married or not married was the condition met or not met says the gamar they're married how are they married just swallowed a cheeseburger Anum Kipper walking out of Burger King McDonald's how are they married because how do you know that in the moment walking out of MC Donald's to walking up to the woman he didn't decide in his heart you know what I can't do this anymore that's not me anymore I'm a new person I'm never doing that again 2.0 version 2.0 here we come Shem here TR Belio maybe in a person's heart they radically transform their identity their sense of selves he's a new person and maybe he's a righteous person so if that's so regret that moment between McDonald's and walking up to the woman to propose regret turned him from a Russia into a he met the condition of being a in that one moment so what do you see if a person has regret they feel bad about the past they're not a russer they're a sadic so how could the gamar say how how could Rabbi say that a wicked person is filled with regret that's the's question it's a good question good question says we're gonna end with this I have to end a little early today we're going to end with this we'll pick up next time you know what the bmov answers I'll just give you the teaser of the answer and then we'll unpack it more next week B says you know why a Russ is filled with regret because they're stuck in the past regret is not regret for the mistake how I can learn and get forward regret is I'm to blame it was entirely because of me I'm terrible I'm a nothing I can never be better I'm a reject I have no future what's the point of it all person who M A person who filled with a debilitating paralyzing sabotaging sense of stuckness and regret and blame that's a russer that's a wicked way of thinking a sadic way of thinking is it happened I was a we had no gas we were stuck on the side of the road I'm a I made in my notes to say it I had a highlighter I circled it I drew arrows towards it I told Brody don't forget remind me to end this way and still I forgot it I'm a but sadak says with all that I can't believe I left in the salt out of the recipe again can't believe we late to carpo again can't believe I reacted that way to my spouse or child again but a sadic says you know what learn from it Grow from it let's go Vitter we're going forward we're plowing forward I'm not gonna be like L's wife I'm not turning around I'm not getting stuck I'm not gonna live a salt life I'm not getting stuck in a pillar of salt viter vter means forward means let's go let's go viter next let's go let's go viter vit I'm learning with my 12y old son picked this up says ABA V now I'll say that you're driving and he wants me to go faster ABA viter let's go faster let's go forward that's our life viter what's next you're right you're right I'm sorry won't happen again I've learned from it what's next what's next let's go what's next what's next a person who says I can't talk about what's next I'm still stuck 30 years ago I said this I shouldn't have said it you said this I can't believe you said that 30 years ago if you can't move on what's next let's go what's next V let's go so beautiful safer if you want to read more about this it's been translated into English schl hman who was a mental health professional in benra who was the go-to man for and the stier and all theik of as a safer something about a soul it's in the title if you Google schlom schan they translated into English it's all about how to deal with our reaction to mistakes the past shortcomings he's dealing with particularly young men who maybe act out in ways they're trying to control and they struggle with so do you live with guilt do you beat yourself up do you feel shame and then it becomes debilitating you're stuck how do you react learn and go Vitter that's the whole book in Hebrew I forgot I forgot the name of the book in Englishman word soul is in the title The Soul secrets of the Soul thank you I don't get any commission I don't get anything from it secrets of the Soul it's a one Wonder F book it unpacks us more we'll pick up with this holy B thought next week don't be a Russ don't be don't be filled with regret even the mistakes we made Were Meant to make we pick it up and we go from there please remain to say we got to get the booklets and we'll complete all together