Live an INSPIRED life! The need to step out of your COMFORT ZONE!

[Music] hello and welcome to practical spirituality here in Asia tour in the old city of jerusalem overlooking the western wall today we're talking about the vulnerability and the and the magic and you know kind of the joy in of life and it's it's a it's living in an amazing life that you're actually inspired about and connected to requires vulnerability if you want to live in that magic you got to be vulnerable and you'll see that that then it that it's true I mean as we go but but let me just start with this this is something I've shared in the past but let's just say that this is the area of that is the edge of things that's the edge meaning this is as far as your car can grip going around turns okay that's the edge of it and and this is the edge of how far you can lean a surfboard coming into a big turn and you know you lean it a little further and it's gone and you're in the soup you know let's say this is the edge of the grip of your mountain bike tires coming down a mountain that's the edge this is the edge of how much you alcohol you can drink before you make a total fool out of yourself publicly and this is the edge of how much you can invest without and lose that money without going completely under you know there's edges everywhere this is the edge of the area where you live that's safe and you go beyond that and you're in your could be in trouble there there's edges all over the place this is the edge of when it's when it's safe to be out at night or whatever you know I could say for at 7:00 p.m. compared to 11 p.m. you know in 11 busier than 3 a.m. you know so there's that's the edge okay and now I'm gonna draw a picture of you sorry if you wear skirts but yeah that's you right in the middle okay I mean I could give it a skirt okay so that's you and higher so anyway so that's you that's you and this is the edge except what happens is well I've noticed most people don't go near the edge in fact my son was telling me how once we drove down to a lot together and I have a nine seater French car called Citroen it's called the citroën jumpy and it's kind of high off the ground and it's it's really fast but it's it's just not really a winning car but there were several other cars in the rally which you kind of wind up in a rally when you drive for hours I'm really boring highway so you know you wind it's a bit of a car rally and every time we wound up on the straight areas so this BMW like m5 whatever would just go like go almost out of sight and then when it started hitting turns and stuff so we would go flying by him now his cars built both for straightaways and turns my button cars built for straightaways not turns but I would beat him every time in the turns I would always pass the guy around the you know then there's a couple kilometers worth of turns and and I'd go flying around him and he would only pass us like a couple minutes later once we got to the next straightaway and then a vote went straight through and so what had happened with him is he thought the edge I'm just gonna go back to the unisex version he thought that the edge of his cars ability around turns was there that clearly because you see takes his foot off the cat's pedal once he it's the turn so that's the edge now now someone who lives in a very safe community even at 3 a.m. there's Believe It or Not their places at at 303 a.m. just like nothing goes wrong at 11 a.m. nothing ever goes wrong at 3 a.m. this plays like that and one of them is my neighborhood in Jerusalem like I think ever goes wrong you don't lock your door you know like there's there's been the amount of break-ins in the 28 years that I live in my neighborhood is zero zero and that includes the number of attempted break-ins is also at zero okay the whole thing is just zero I mean you might as well just take your door off the hinges you know like it's for winter you know there's just no crime so so the anyway so so what but what happens is I won't ever even call me crazy but I won't let my daughter's Wasco from the bus stop after okay for some reason before 10 no grub you know 9:30 come on Oh 10 I want a phone call I'm gonna walk out to the bus stop and I'm gonna walk them home you know what is wrong with me there's just something wrong with me and the answer is yes there's something wrong with me is that I don't go near the edge when it comes to my daughters and so so I put the edge here and and if they were walking home for whatever reason like they're they're already off the bus and I get the phone call and I'm in the bathroom so to me it's safer to be walking on than sitting around bus stops the middle night so I'd rather she walks home except how am I gonna be feeling until she walks through the door how am I gonna feel it till she walks through the door a little anxious I'm waiting for her to get home and I want her to get home and I'm probably gonna go the mathema squiggly as Basel oh and go meet her halfway so I'll be anxious how's that guy got a feeling the BMW built four turns man that guy oh my gosh I'm in my Citroen jumpy 9 seater family car passing this you know 200 thousand shekels race car around the turns how's he gonna feel outside where he feels his car can go how's it gonna feel very vulnerable and let's just say raise your hand if you feel of the men here raising it if you feel like a little nervous about about supporting a family one day like meaning with with not just what you need of course you wouldn't get what you need but but like you actually wanted a little wealth but you're servus about that getting that well yes if someone else is nodding but if something must be something wrong with his hand so I said raise your hand but you get that feeling sometimes okay it's it's very normal that's very normal that we have that I mean that's totally nor does n't make much sense but you know it doesn't make any sense but it's normal and so what will happen is in order to make in order to provide your family their needs you could do that well within the circle what if you want go into the levels of like affording you know cruises in you know cruises in Cabo San Lucas you know and like don't ask don't ask but if you're if you're planning on the extra stuff you know it ain't gonna come why because it only comes to people who go to the edge you understand it comes to people go to the edge now tell me when you go outside your your we'll call it the Ring of Fire you know that it's the ring of of you know that's where your fears come and the anxiety hits when you go outside the Ring of Fire um how are you doing it like how's your well-being outside there once you go out there well we mentioned already well there's anxiety and a lot of fear comes up and all kinds of ideas of what might be there what lurks in the darkness and and so you'll find yourself risk of risk aversion you'll be not wanting to risk much and and you'll just be kind of holding your breath till you get back in the safe spot like you just want to get back to the safe spot and be less vulnerable to things now that that is the this is just the nature of most people and and this is what separates the highly successful or or the people were really living life than than people who are playing it safe and and not really living life to its fullest but rather watching that on YouTube you know like who needs to live like they're full of these days anyway when you've got YouTube hour or you got a lot of people who would rather plate on a screen you know with a virtual what do you call a virtual virtual self it's called that avatar they'd rather have an avatar online and take all the risks they're you know they'll take their risks online not not in real life now and against real success will be people who never get to the edge of things everything needs to be navigated to and and and now you don't have to do with everything like I'm you see I don't do it when my daughter is like I'm really careful with my daughters and so and so navigating you want to navigate you don't navigate everything I I don't even know why I would navigate it with my daughters I don't mind going out to get them and but what you do want to navigate towards the edge so my my son was mentioning this because today we're driving back from mountain biking in my Citroen jumpy and and I decided to take a road that that's offroad in the car meaning we had off-road it on a bike but there was a way back that I thought I could maybe get quicker through you know a four-wheel-drive Road my car is not a four-wheel-drive truck it's a nine seater minivan and what they had done no keep from the erosion is they created these big humps that caused water to go down and you know big water bars but big humps so so I said to my son you know could I go any faster without starting to get air off those bumps he's like even a half climber faster we'd be flying off of those bumps and I said you think when you get your license you're gonna drive like your father and he said definitely and and I said why and he said because I've never really driven with anyone else I mean this is this is what driving is and that's when we start talking about the edge and I said well the reason I do it is because the car was designed to you know to be able to comply its comply to a certain edge and so I keep it at the edge and when I Drive my ride my mountain bike down stuff today we're doing downhill mountain biking which is like insane you know like you're when you get to the bottom of your fingers are permanently on the brakes thank you how are you you know you can't move your hands from like you know you're just like flying down these things and but we we go to the edge of our equipments ability to the edge and now I want to bring up God here for a moment who made the edge kind of gave it away who made the edge God made the edge kind of made the edge I mean these are rules of reality whether they're in business within relationships whether they're in driving biking and late-night stuff like God made the edge what are you gonna say to God if you stayed within the Ring of Fire if you kept yourself invulnerable to to life we're gonna say to God thank you imagine if you if you actually lived in reality cuz all of this is obviously reality and safe in safe reality and it's how you succeed in business has got a push out to the edge of it and so if you imagine if if you lived in reality sorry you imagine if God showed you a full surround sound and sight 3d Omnimax you know like full onic full immersion film of every little possibility of what would happen in your life had you lived in reality we're calling this box reality that's what's possible without getting hurt no one's getting hurt in this box outside the box that's where you get hurt that's where you go broke you know so it's a but what if God showed you what life looked like if you had if you had like really lived within reality all these years what if God showed you that not obviously be very complex because just like you know you make one choice in this world it can change your entire trip you know just little things cause big things over time you know like this is a very small angle but over time it's it's a giant distance between this and that you know if you keep going with it so yeah I mean it sort of has to be a highly complex film but if you imagine watching the film of reality of what life would have looked like had you been in reality instead of your own fears it'd be a scary thing to face and then even without dying and having to face that isn't it doesn't it feel a little like we're disappointing him I feel like I'm disappointing him if I'm not on the edge like for example I just don't drink lager I don't drink longer because there's craft beer available and it makes talk cost three times more it usually does I'd rather not have beer then you know if I don't have enough for for an IPA or a stout or some special group I'd rather not have any because I don't want to answer for the you know I don't want to answer for Coors Light you know or Coors Light money Python said it's very close to water anyway the but do you understand what I'm saying like God created reality and and we've got you know like you have to have the nicest stereo that you can afford obviously but it's worth saving up for just see so God's not like what kind of stereo is that that's no stereo you know it was 2019 and that's the stereo you got yeah that's the headphones you chose you know better not buy headphones and wait a few months till you have a little more money and buy the headphones that are up to snuff of the technology available in headphones so that you're not some in some limited place but today's class believe it or not is not about any of this today's class is is the recognition that the vulnerability that comes with pushing outside that circle is where the magic is that's where life starts that's where things get exciting that's where you're you get that's where motivation that comes that's where you start to feel inspired and and your you got to be on your toes they've already proven in brain science that till you get here till you get outside that circle there are parts of your brain in the actual string of genetics like your actual double helix chromosomes that don't yet come into existence till you're there there's something about telling would you like to learn with us no they're not coming in she's showing her the building yeah for an event so meaning there's actual people who live in here will have not even been fully born yet because I mean think about when you're born like frizz on an ember has barely formed and then your forms more informs more and then you're born and then it forms more informs more and we've been forming and so they've already proven that there's parts of your actual DNA that only get unlocked when you're faced with the unknown and vulnerability it only gets unlocked there and then it does its job like once you're there then it starts doing things and and it creates structures that now are yours and your and obviously take away the vulnerability because now you have a structure to deal with that but there's we actually will be what we could actually return our bodies not having fully been born because of this this thing and there there's something magical about it but I'd like to because I discuss order and chaos a lot but which one would you call chaos and which one would you call order what would this inner part be order because because this is what this is the order will use this head for it okay order so the the everything that's in that circle is is where I feel life makes sense and I'm safe and things are good in there that's order and and be for whatever reason this whole area that's just as safe and there's I it's important you realize that this area is just as safe as that we my was clear with that everyone was that clear there's nothing less safe going on out here where does it start being not safe yeah that's where it starts getting music here is totally safe I mean like one I represent save any link in my neighborhood you can sleep on the street you can take your bed out of your house and just lay down you're on the street wearing like jewelry and no one's gonna mess with you the whole night you know so anyway so this outer area this whole area out here is basically chaos yeah in our minds and hearts you know it's all the it's all the unknowns you know and before I go on I just want to mention that you go there all the time I mean you do like it like for example meaning in your own little safe way you like chaos for example do you ever go dancing you ever danced yeah it's not a very ordered way to be having moving your body you understand you like to actually commanding someone walked up to you while you're dancing and said what's your first name hope command just a friend of your walk up to you who doesn't dance and never saw you dance and they're like hope what is wrong with your body and you're just like and you're like I'm you know and she's like we'll stop you're like no it's like why not and you're like cuz it feels good I like it you know I love dancing you understand like you go chaos sometimes with that body of yours and give you another example this lady you married by any chance you ever been yeah did you notice in your married days that that sometimes you would sabotage the relationship and sometimes he would what she's gonna cry really well anyway I'll help you your when you were married to your great husband sometimes you would sabotage things and like make him like kind of have to beg for for love and whatever because of whatever he came home late or whatever he did you know he he it's part of the job of a man is to do stupid things once in a while like totally forget to call and wind up in the town next door by accident and say oh I'm sorry you know why don't you call you know whatever but the we create chaos we create casts there's something about us that creates will create chaos and what could have been total order anyone here ever done business I don't have ever been in a business owned a business worked in a business anyone here been responsible for business nobody you've been yeah okay great and did you ever get to a point where the business was running well and did you take another risk to build it bigger yeah you did and then did you sleep as well as the night before once you know you don't sleep well and why did you electively create that chaos in your life so that's what I want to say is that is that we all go there we all go there we're all willing to take a risk and and we like that now we do it on our terms you know we do it on our terms and and we you know where we take the risks and calculated ways and we sabotage like when husbands sabotage the closeness women do it too by the way when when when spouses sabotage their closeness it's calculated they're not doing something so stupid that like the whole thing's gonna fall apart they do it in a way that it's gonna shake the ground a bit and and often make them closer afterwards they'll often be closer as a result maybe that was deep down their dream was was that I'd like to be closer and maybe if I get you angry enough that I'll wake up to the fact that I'm I'm not as close as I could be and so maybe I'll get you upset and you'll say to me hey you know you were inconsiderate and and then I'll say wow I'm in the doghouse now for being inconsiderate and causing a little bit of introspection about about myself and my relationship to my wife so maybe it's gonna get me closer as a result so so maybe that as an unconscious closeness we're looking for but we don't like too much order we don't like too much order you see people sabotage all the time all the time people are sabotaging their order kids with school like those of us who raise kids in school you know like you've got a schedule keep it you know but there's your kid you know at the house two hours after they left for school and you're like what are you doing home and they're like well it's a long story and it's like your jobs to be in school every day okay like you don't do stuff that makes them send you home you know and but they just they can't take the monotony of the order it's too much order so we like chaos we just like it and we're we're kind of addicted to it and and we like and now let's bring the edge up we like running up to the edge of things a lot in certain aspects we like to run up to the edge so just that my two favorite sports are very edgy sports so here when I'm mountain biking so I'm coming down a trail and it's steep and but it's a trail I mean it's where the tires should go now there's the sides which are like boulders and and cliffs and all kinds of stuff where the tire should not go and for some reason I I'm you know it's a little immature but I'm fascinated with this work of keeping it on the trail Pinchas lake i guess it's about as dumb as getting a basketball through a hoop which is like not that exciting but you know the ball does fit it fits through that so like I don't know why everyone has to gather themselves all around this sport to watch you know basically illiterate people run up and down the court trying to prevent each other from putting the ball no hood why don't you just let the guy put the ball nope like what's the big deal so let him do it and be anyway but I'm kind of busy doing the same thing really when I'm focusing down the trail and if I'm and as I micro adjust the brakes and my weight and keep my center of gravity as low as possible I'm I'm on the edge of order like I'm keeping total order here and I'm right on the edge of chaos because if I lose my grip and you and and unless I'm reading the reading the ground cuz ground looks different when it's looser and it looks different when it's tighter and so if you pull that back brake a little too tight when it's starting to look looser you're backed I was gonna start fishtailing and you've lost control of this situation so that's like oh I saw I saw two feet of looser ground which you can't see is loose it's just got a different tint in the light of that time of day I need to release my back brake at just a hair's breadth to make sure I'm not gonna slide on that stuff make sure the tire is gonna grip in and then the second I'm on the other side of that I got to pull a lot more of it because I just took I start going too fast for the to keep in controlling the that trail so you understand it's a total ride between chaos on the sides and order down the middle but in surfing the best example in surfing of orderin counts is when you're inside the tube of a wave and your micro adjusting your body position both to the size of the tube because that does undulate big and small and but also your you know your just because the waves not just going sideways it's kind of going forward towards the beach at the same time so you're you're you're you're going sideways but you're also allowing for some lateral movement all at the same time and and you have to have that orderly because if you don't if you lose the order in that chaos and you get picked off by the lip of the wave you're going in the full washing machine mode I mean you're you're you're having it you're having a you know a 400 pound enema enema you know in seawater in every orifice you're gonna be totally disoriented you're not even know which ways up by the time that wave lets you go yeah you literally have to look at the bubbles to see which way they're going you're so disoriented and if the waves are really big you could be 2030 feet under the water after you've been pummeled to smithereens which means you have to ragdoll your body the whole time because if you use any energy you could not have enough energy to float to the top afterwards so you have to ragdoll the whole body and let the whitewater washing machine just do its thing until it lets you go and so here you are in perfect order with total chaos all around you and and this is where life is the most magical and it's a highly vulnerable place there are a lot of people who don't go anywhere near it in life and those are generally the people who don't seem very inspired and then there are others like myself who were raised to always stay on the edge always be on the edge and you can be so inspired that people actually even want to hear what you have to say which is somewhat strange to me I'm very disappointed that people come to my class personally because that means there's still something I have to give to people and I was hoping by the time this point of my career that anything I would say would be redundant because the whole I have such optimism for the world that I keep thinking everyone's going to be exactly where I'm at and now I'll be going to someone who's gonna take me somewhere else which I do anyway but but we're all here to to bump up our game I guess and I'm still helping people bump up theirs this area of vulnerability is for young kids smaller or bigger the feeling a bit vulnerable stuff meaning where the kid where if you had a three-year-old would you want this circle bigger that you want the circle small small well it's an interesting question I think I'd want it small but I think whether you want it or don't want it it's gonna be small anyway because the kid has no ability to order life an adult would order life and and so it it by force is small when saying let me just about that it's by force small because the kid just can't handle himself beyond you know like 20 feet from his mother or father because they're just they're already out of their depth they're in a total you know they're in the unknown zone everything's done no they're never bored they're never bored they have no fear it's one of the dangers of toddlers they're not afraid of anything because they're just their minds aren't developed enough to understand the edge there are always the happiest person I've asked hundreds of people with a happiest person in their house as it always boils down to the two-year-old they're by far the happiest they're the most self expressed I mean how would you feel in your life if you were fully self-express well you were one day when you're about to I mean they really got it all so so now let's bring these equations together here got a little toddler I don't know nothing about nothing he's extremely or she is extremely vulnerable like nothing's more vulnerable than a toddler more vulnerable than an infant and infants the parents are got it toddlers they're on their own wheels man they're they're moving around those kids they're extremely vulnerable and yet they outdo us in every category that we would call worth having they love deeper and weren't and crept more open with their love were expressive they hug more with their whole being they're not afraid of failure they'll do something over and over and over and over until they get it right they do not quit there's no it's not like they quit later than us they don't quit till they get it you know and it doesn't seem to bother them there's no they don't even self reflect on the fact that it didn't work they'll just keep going they're the most vulnerable people and yet they're the living in the biggest magic because they can't help but be outside the circle everywhere they go no matter where they go they're outside that circle and also who has the most energy it's the most energy okay you ever seen the way a toddler moves around from when they wake up till they I'd say go to sleep or I should really say till they pass out you know we've had several times in our house we're like you know where's where's you know where's Moishe we're like I don't know haven't seen him we search a little islands anyway and it's been already two hours we go into the bathroom and there's a little toddler on the toilet you passed out just from all the energy he puts out all day you imagine if you've tried that how long do you think you'd go an hour moving your body the way a toddler moves his body in an hour you go in a whole hour and they're gonna do that all day they're not gonna stop moving they have no concept of where the edges on human exhaustion and probably half hour exhaustion comes from preconceived notions of exhaustion they don't get hot on hot days you have to like give them water they won't take it on their own they don't get hungry ever toddlers never even hungry I mean that's the whole challenge is trying to get food into their going you know and they're like and you're like kid it's now 7:00 p.m. you last ate at noon and you've done nothing but expend energy the entire afternoon one bite no not one bite they just they're not hungry and they're and literally their whole world is meaning that circles are almost around their body it's like everything everything around them everything around them is just vulnerability instead of it being out there it's like here little gingerbread man here it's right that's the edge for them and they beat us in every category of life that we all want to say what do adults want you want to feel alive you want love and closeness right you want to connect to people and feel loved and they beat us on that every time and and they don't sabotage it also and they and you want it you want to be expressed right you want express yourself and and you'd like to have health and vitality and have the energy of this little energizer bunny and and you also as we know today is you want to live in the moment you don't want to be full of anxiety over what could be and based on everything that was and now I kind of know what could because of everything that's happening to me in the past and you know you're everywhere but here where our toddlers right here and full of vulnerability and so they're it's a nice case study for us to know that to know that more vulnerabilities better too much chaos is bad sorry mole vulnerability and kiss is better too much order is simply bad for us and it's really bad for us and you know why it's really bad first because it's also bad for our health I mean I already spoke many ways it's bad for us regarding God bad for us regarding our own emotional well-being but having this beast scary out here is is bad for our actual bodies did you know that fear creates chemicals in your body that are that cause age early aging you know that fear causes chemicals that make you age younger I forget what it's called something Osen what how do you say no I forget what it's called what it's if it's the pure chemical you someone could Google their fam without it's the the fear chemical no but but whatever it is it's directly correlated with aging and meaning it's extremely taxing on us the reason that is is because think about it when you're afraid of something your body goes into protection mode protection mode takes a lot more energy than chill mode right when you're in chill mode you know yeah you're just you're just on the beach chair you know like you're in chill mode yeah you're not really putting on any extra energies but whereas when you're in fear mode you know you gotta get fortified and you you just start tightening up around it and now you got to start figuring things out and you know it's it's a lot going on with you now like you're you're way over work in this situation meanwhile there's not even a situation because you're you just stepped over to here you didn't go to there this is where situations started that's where the situation's begin situations start here and so meanwhile I'm like needlessly aging and needlessly expending all kinds of energies that the body's built for so you can protect yourself when I'm nowhere near anything that's worth protecting because I didn't even get near the edge know what sometimes you do it depends what we're talking about that's where you when you go to a mentor like you're saying like in business it's hard to know where the edges everything you just talk talk to the experts know you know where the edges go mountain biking this I'll show you the edge you understand I'll take out surfing your edge is gonna be very different my edge but I'll show you the edge because I don't want you to get hurt just go to someone who knows this code you go to people have taken that risk 50 times never make your own mistakes in business let other people make mistakes in business and you go talk to them and you learn from and develop okay everyone um it was a pleasure speaking to all Shalom if you enjoyed watching this well watch some more send it click it forward it join it subscribe to it you know keep coming on in joining me in this amazing movement to make a big difference in the world and the biggest thing you can do of all is to join the yom tov media club calm please go online yom tov media club calm