Lashon Harah - Basic rules to the prohibition of saying Lashon Hara

[Music] we're going to learn a little bit about the rules about the prohibition of a talking because many people they they they don't know the rules forget about the law there's also rules and to some extent many people don't accept what i can't say the truth i can't tell so and so what he or she did it's for their benefit they need to know i must warn them and many others so besides the actual laws one needs to know the basic rules and this is one of the most important things that one need to kind of engrave on their memory because when you don't know the rules then that's how you fail and like in any type of game in the in this world if you don't know the rules then how you're going to play so we need to know not only the actual law but also the rules so we're going to go very uh slowly one by one and of course uh that might take time we're not going to do it in one class but at least we have to start going through the basic rules and without further ado there's not much of a preparation to do to the class we just learn so nerva right now we're going to be focused on because if you remember we also talked about slandering slandering is when i lie when i actually invent something and then gossiping that we just talk about something and the problem is that is 100 the truth but we'll see what are the rules the problem starts when they start mixing the rashonora the truth with lies but nevertheless first we're going to focus about and the first rule goes as follows i'm not allowed to tell to anybody the deficiency or lacking or weaknesses of another person mummav the cold of regnot also i'm not allowed to say different physical problems that the person has and mum is like a literally a deficiency or blemish the right word for moom is a blemish and the blemish can be physical the blemish can also be emotional or mental or any other blemish and any type of information that will be gnut that will go away and uh insults or shalom hurt or put the other person in a in a row in a bad light not only that anything that has to do with busha bouchard is when i humiliate somebody when i degrade somebody when i make somebody look real real bad and also bisayon bisayon is when i really disgrace in somebody and again all this information can be true but nevertheless i'm taking private information that by telling it to another person it causes harm to the person i'm talking about can be shame can be embarrassment it can be imagine how you're going you tell somebody oh so-and-so has this and that's a medical issue i mean that's also part of the show it's true now i know i know right away comes the question but what about when shidduchim first learn the rules nevertheless so we say we know how to say about the lacking the deficiency hurting insulting and so forth or call davara or anything that is negative and bad about another person more than that i am not allowed to give over any type of information that will cause harm to the other person and what's amazing here is in all the rules laws of rashawn allah it says if you notice you have to listen to the hebrew chavez is his friend so you know it says israel oh friends we're all brothers we're all connected nevertheless it says a person that even a person that is not my enemy if it says so no the one who hates him or evo his enemy he says have allah means that it can be on somebody that i know you and me can talk about a third person that is acquainted with us nothing against him but i still say something that has can cause him damage also if anything that i say there's nothing wrong with it i can say you know that so itself oh yeah that is such a good business deal last week he had a hundred thousand dollars really what are you talking about yeah i'm not saying anything wrong it's not causing any problem to so and so i'm just advertising your financial statement right now not to do that if you said any of the above you just went over the severe sin of the shoulder nevertheless it doesn't matter benima now at this point it doesn't matter if what i say is true or is a lie or ove or if it's a mixture between the truth and lie now the reality is that it's almost impossible to say the shogunate that it's only a myth but if you remember we spoke about in the morning we lie all the time so i always will add another detail to make it sound a little bit juicier man i'm just gonna tell you one thing let me round it up a little bit that it will sound a little bit more convincing or a little bit more harsh then right away it's already mixed with truth and with the lie i mean the truth doesn't always sound nice sometimes yeah but once it's already mixed then i have the mixture of lashonara and slandering where do we find the source and not only source but the breakdown this it can be found in the in room number one in section number one and then of course now i told you now we're really starting to scrape the first surface later on we're gonna go and one detail after that and now we're just spreading out some of the rules now what happens is this is where the the problem starts yes but what if this benefit with you hearing what i have to say maybe you have to say maybe you have to hear that and i make all the calculations that you have to hear it right now for whatever reason if there's benefit don't don't think that we're not allowed to talk about anything sometimes there is benefit and maybe i have to warn you right now maybe you're about to buy a house and i know a detail about the house that will cause you not to buy it because there's a problem with the legal papers or documents or something with the construction i you need to know i make all the thoughts and wait a minute you need to know that well i'm not going to say anything we talked about last week lottie terenik should be freeware i'm not allowed to put a stumbling block in front of a blind person and if i know you're about to shalom going to a bad deal am i allowed to tell you or not and this is one example remaining you're allowed to say it as long as it's the truth can come and add your addition to it but there's conditions you can't just say oh it's truth let me run and say that no has to be conditions we're not going to go through these rules right now this is a whole section when it comes that it calls la nagali toilet it's it's still called but there's a benefit to that so that's a whole different thing we're not going to stop on this right now because this is where it becomes a little bit more tricky this is where it really becomes what do i do and how many times do you know of a situation and you yourself thinking should i say should i not say what should i say i'm this is where also first of all you want to go and consult the right rabbinical authority but nevertheless this is called it with a benefit but look how scary it is it's still called ashanaha but there's a benefit next next rule is the prohibition or the fact that i'm not saying this is one of the most important rules that you need to know because the general can be with talking it can be with writing today you have facebook you don't need to talk a lot you just need to how they used to say with yellow pages remember that thing or the dinosaurs remember that they did the yellow pages let the fingers walk i remember that now tell my kid yellow pages they'll be like what what pages but nevertheless it can be in writing and even in hinting even in hinting can be leshonova how many times you say something or somebody says something and you're like what oh yeah there's another one emojis and all sorts of so also hinting is la and again where can you find the source to that same book in rule number one but chapter in section eight another thing that you're not allowed to do you're laughing but it's winking that's also i mean of course now i'm saying very thing in general but also winking can be a part of la sol nera and of course simone adam hand movements and leg movements and eye rolling all everything sometimes this is also what what what so i had to have to be a little bit uh showing him but nevertheless this again this can be found in the part of the book of the frame that's called and again we're just kind of going through the rules i'm saying that because later on we're going to go one by one and start dissecting it how about is that i just show you something that somebody else wrote but from that you can see something bad about the something the the person who wrote it i can just show you a letter look what it's so and so sent me and again today it's even much harder because you have text messages and whatsapp and many other forms of writing and needless to say that if i can show you something that so-and-so wrote doesn't matter but nevertheless it shows some type of a deficiency a lack something that is missing but the person who wrote it that's another problem now give you one example of many because what does it mean i show you something that somebody wrote he gives an example here even if there's a misspelling now you have in when you write in a digital way it corrects you but what happens if there's a spelling here i can say look harry wrote it here what did he do he just wrote it with a spelling mistake that's uh we all have some spelling mistakes especially when you go to a new country you move to israel you don't know how to write hebrew oh i i don't know i'm not american i might sound like i speak good english who says i don't know how to write english sometimes you saw somebody something somebody wrote and from how he wrote it who wrote it a little kid this is this looks like a little kid wrote this uh this letter there's also that's a part a type of le chanella so sometimes you know i try to i run the the tests on my kids because not too long ago one of my kids wrote a certain essay and the other kid looked at it and said and was making fun that there was spelling mistakes so that's the shaman don't you think i saw the spelling mistake myself and if i didn't figure it out you might you tell me some of your business nevertheless again this is another form of and more than that this is where most people fail i didn't say who even if you don't say who's it who it is even if you don't say details so again even who once were talking is not mentioning who's the person he talks but from the way that i say that you already know who i'm talking about that's where people think that they don't say because if you don't if you don't know who i'm talking about then what's the you can walk into a conversation and you're just here and then he says this and that now you have a trap in front of you you say the word who that's it don't say oh dory i don't want to hear i don't hear but nevertheless if i tell you something and from what i say you know last week we had a worker in our home and he painted the walls of all painted walls oh i saw so and so that's it you understand what i'm talking about so you have to also be very careful even that's part of the hinting of now i'm doing it very obvious but sometimes you can say a certain thing let's say just for the sake of the example there's only one butcher in town and he's saying about the meat there's only one butcher in town and this is not like a big city that every second store you have a supermarket one town one village is one butcher everybody knows so again you're not allowed to say when from this is called the varmi tag that i understand from what you're saying who are you talking about that you understand from what i say about who you're talking talking about or that by me saying a whole situation eventually you will find out according who to the information who am i talking about if a person did that a verb then you transgress the simple of telling that because you understand and you know what the human mind is right away you're trying to you you uh apply your private detector skills he said this he said and this is also if you didn't say anything bad about your friend you're just saying uh something that is not good or not bad same thing ela said i can tell you something that there's nothing bad in the words that i'm saying but you understand from what i'm saying the negative part that comes out of it so again it's important to know the rules because a lot of people think this is where they fail is i didn't say any name i didn't say any situation i just said a few details but come on anyone will understand who am i talking about when what and how and not only that and from that you understand something bad about the other person this is also even if i had a hint in it and i think i'm tricking the system and i will not say too much information but i can't so i have to throw one hint and with this hint he already understood everything next [Music] sarcasm is yeah everything of course if the sarcasm sarcasm is the uh you know the greeting the somebody or hurting or whatever it is so nevertheless yes even sometimes uh like i said their main rule is that it's always can be the truth and the sarcasm is putting somebody now in the insulting you know i was uh the clown of the group when i was a young individual and sometimes in the sarcasm you really humiliate somebody you really degrade somebody you really make somebody embarrassed in front of others so not only that you transgressing other sins benedict not allowed to embarrass somebody in public this is a called alban who is one of the worst sins but nevertheless sarcasm can also fall on the shoulder next is the prohibition of saying doesn't matter if you have the intention to spread the word my intention to make you look bad and to make you a a look in a way that it's a shame to you all if i show all that i want to humiliate you like we said sarcasm sometimes sarcasm can be it's only to make me look everybody's laughing for me and some other person he's the target oliver ought to make the person look real bad in regards in a way that it's bizarre that it's much a shame for the person oligomer sometimes i say something only because i want that person to suffer and i know that with what i will say that person will suffer and the nasdaq the suffering the the the loss doesn't have to be necessarily financially it can be emotionally it can be you can lose in a deal or whatever it is doesn't matter but if i'm causing you any type of a hardship that's already a problem now even if you're doing it from any other reasons other than what i just said so degrading humiliating making fun i want you to have damage sometimes a person will talk la shonra i have a store you have the exact same store and i will start telling all sorts of things why i want you to have damage faster shalom i don't want people to go to you i want people to go to me nevertheless even if i'm doing it from any other reason don't try not to say otherwise there's no damage there's no humiliation there's no way no to me again also if i'm saying it as a by the way but i'm just saying it as a joke or as a regular conversation ven cavanauto claude vazoto and i don't have any intention to make you look bad or not only that to make any harm to you or any type of way that i'm humiliating in any type of a way i'm just telling some information and in my mind i am totally not hurting you i know that it's not going to insult you it's not going to humiliate you i'm just telling everybody you know that you just bought a brand new mercedes it's gorgeous it's beautiful such a smooth ride and i'm not doing anything to save anything bad about you on the country actually making you look better but nevertheless i am saying something about somebody there's no point to it nevertheless that will be the microverb this is nevertheless still this is we learned that specifically actually not from the cafeteria rather from the rambam in chapter seven where it's called and he says that that even if you say any type of idea to spread something the idea this of this rule is that i'm just spreading a rumor now if i have a bad intention that's one thing sometimes i'm spreading aroma just because i'm bored and i want to spread the rumor and it can be something good did you hear she's pregnant i didn't tell you to tell the whole neighborhood right now maybe i don't want to say that so sometimes it's just for the sake of spreading the rumor i had a i know of a certain individual he wanted to be the one who gets everybody to know he wants to be the one who says the news doesn't matter good bad degrading humiliating doesn't matter some people want to be the first in line like reporters or whatever it is next is this is another very important rule all the rules are important but this is also very important that it doesn't matter if the person that i'm talking about is present or not present sometimes people think if you're present then there's no russian allah here we're all here now majority talk behind the back that's one thing that's worse because the person can defend himself i didn't say that i didn't do that why are you coming and making this up and even if i did i did it because but now i can't protect myself i can't protect my good name this is when you go behind the back but sometimes it's insane in a room and i want to make sure that everybody knows and then the person is next to me so another rule it doesn't matter if the person is present the person i'm talking about is present or not present so let's do let's try to squeeze in a few more the prohibition of saying and you look at the word that he's using sipu sifu is the story or less appear is to tell i have to tell you something it exists even if you're doing it i didn't plan it's not that i was cooking it in my head how am i going to say it what should i say happens to me i bump into somebody in the street i didn't think in the morning that i would wake up and say but i bumped into somebody and in a very mundane way or i just bumped into somebody and i'm telling you the story this is one thing even if you don't because sometimes you know for example in the punishment in the law of murder there's different degrees if i had the intention and i planned it and i already prepared everything including the weapon and the alibi and that's already murdered from the first degree but if i drove in a car and somebody stopped came out and slapped me and i took out a gun and shot him that's not murder from this first degree i didn't plan anything wasn't a motive here or any i mean i still did the murder pastor but this is different level same thing here i didn't plan to say the show no i was just walking in the street you came all upset told me something and i'm like oh yeah oh i know and he also did this and that i didn't plan anything here this is one thing they call shaken and more than that more than that if you're doing it in a very consistent way you have an agenda you know what you're doing it's systematic you already know what you're saying how are you saying when you're saying to who you're saying that's already a whole different thing that's when this time and many other sages will tell you as say goodbye you signed off your alarm about why because you already had a system here if i'm bumping into somebody in the street or i got caught in some type of a situation and i said that okay you said fine you not making any uh preparations here but nevertheless when does it become severe that a person can mamash loses when you have an agenda and i and you say i'm going to destroy this person he did this to me i'll show him and then and as they say in hebrew the one who laughs last has the last last laugh this is a big thing the prohibition of saying is even if you're saying it doesn't matter if you're saying it willingly you just waltz into the room and you are gladly informing the situation oh doesn't matter if you force to say that you know the information three people are around you putting pressure on you what did he say when did he do it how did he do it what is it what rainfall doesn't matter and even if they pressured you doesn't matter you have to and even if your father or your rebbe your rabbi tells you tell me the information because one might say it's my rabbi it's my i have to respect him it's my father i have to respect him doesn't matter even if your father or your rabbi told you you're still not allowed or that they're asking you to say something sometimes somebody will tell you don't have to tell me all the details just tell me the location or just tell me who was behind it but i understand from the little information that you're telling me who are we talking about nevertheless even that you're not allowed to say that they'll tell you just tell me one detail you know it's very very tempting when somebody said i don't want to say lashon allah but somebody did this and that and you were like who don't ask who that's where you open the trap so i told you already somebody in notorangu who came and told me he called i heard somebody said about you this and that is it true and i said no it's a complete lie thank you very much he said and he hung up the phone and of course i called him right away to congratulate him for the honesty and the integrity and the courage to ask me if it's true or not i told him probably many others just accepted the la general and enjoyed it and it was here literally here to say who told you that and and it was so like what's the big deal i'm just asking who i need to know no you don't need to know so one one cannot interrogate the other person to tell him some details don't tell me who it is but is it uh somebody who's involved in involved in that business deal no you of course if you are forcing somebody to take to get the lashana out then you're not allowed to do that this is also if you already had us how do you say a pill of the tongue a split of the tongue how would you say that slip slip of the tongue you already said something i'm not allowed to start interrogating you now what happens is i will tell you who said that i don't want to tell you you have to tell me i don't want to tell you it's a nara no no you have to tell me please it's very important i have to know if i don't know there's going to be a disaster this is going to happen you're not allowed to do that in order to interrogate the person and even to say just give me this in this detail is so-and-so involved in it or this is that no all that all of the above i'm not going to give too many details because it's irrelevant he says one one rule af now don't start say interrogating and he said then she said it maybe and what but nevertheless it doesn't matter to conclude this section it doesn't matter if i do it willingly if you pressure me if you pressure me that's not nice but still i'm not allowed to next kaya lim soral kim loves a cold call mono this is a love what we're talking here about right now it's a negative precept from the torah one of the negative mitzvots and he says something here very interesting even if you lose all your money don't talk if you lose all your money you're not allowed to go over this prohibition they call chicken and more than that your honor sometimes by me not saying anything oh my honor is going to be under the table right now my respect my great status shut up don't talk you have to lose your money your respect your honor if somebody told you tell me this information somebody's telling you tell me and they're not telling you tell me i need to know a few details now what happens is just one example they tell me my boss tells me tell me what happened here and there and if you're not i'm going to fire you you're going to fire me what am i going to do now i'm going to lose my job now has another situation this is when pressure comes i told you if a person has to do this love then he says lose all your money just don't talk or lose your honor and respect and also if somebody asks you to do something and there's a threat there if you don't tell me i'm going to fire you and even if the threat is between the words also or not only that if i won't say that then people will think that i'm the fool or am i am wrong here just look at that to what extent now if i'm not going to say that everybody will think i'm the wrong one still not allowed to say that imagine now somebody comes and there's a little going on and i can easily say i didn't do nothing it's him he is the liar he's making it up i'm allowed to do that that's the show i'm talking about but the thai one was talking against me i have to shut up even if you have to protect your name get fired whatever it is and if he's going to overpower himself and overcome this strong desire i'm clearing up my name i'm protecting myself and you're still going to say because this is where it gets tricky somebody talks to the shoulder about me now i look the fool oh i look wrong well i look like i did something wrong so how do i clear up my name by throwing the blame on somebody else and i'm what am i one by saying what am i doing i'm just clearing out my name nevertheless it's not showing up but if you overpower yourself and you don't sell a shoulder that no angel or any creature can imagine or fathom what is this light just when you okay nothing i told you i shared with you a few personal things i can only share with you personal things and uh and you know our sages saying and the wise one is the one who has experience so in order to teach something you need to be experienced so if i would live on some mountain in new zealand who will talk about me the monkeys the sheep the dolphins so i need to live in a place then everybody talks to shauna about me so i can know get slammed from all different directions now go teach because you know what you know what it means so nevertheless but if a person knows to in any situation is kill oreganos now i told you before but just before we finishing this section and explaining about the organelles we learned in the first week that this is the water level every person when they die they go up to chamine you're not going to be the one who's skipping the line everybody goes up and you go to the heavenly court and they give you a book like this i have a thick book i give it to you you open it and then it says from day one to the last day everything that you did good bad neutral thought speech action sins meets both everything he said in the book so he says there's that sometimes the person opens the book and he says wait a minute i didn't do this mitzvah this is not my mitzvah i don't remember doing that mitzvah the soul remembers everything it's not like now that i don't remember what i eat for breakfast the soul that remembers everything so he tells i think there's a misprint in my book i didn't do this mitzvah what do they tell him this mitzvah is of a person who spoke about you and you took his mitzvoth you got his mitzvot oh remember i told him the first day please please talk lashon allah about me as much as you can please why i get all the mitzvoth and in the same time i look at the book and i see sins and i'm like wait a minute i didn't do didn't do these sins why i have sins in the book that i didn't do because you talked to hashanah about somebody so you took their sins so sometimes you can find a lot of surprises in this book but nevertheless the best scenario is that somebody talks to shauna about me then i get his mitzvot and you know what i do i give him my sins this is a very good business deal i should make little cards that says please talk lashana about me now go to shul learn torah give some charity way i can i can get everything and i get rid of everything that i did nevertheless when i talk to show narada then i give over all my mitzvot to the one that i'm talking about and when i talk to hashanah when i'm talked i'm the subject and i get the mitzvot but nevertheless why am i telling you this because not too long ago and again i can only share with you private things it's not about it's just to make the the to emphasize what i'm trying to say so somebody came to us not too long ago and she said listen i've been to here there and there and uh so and so and this situation and said like this and like that about you me talking to me and my wife they said this they said that i'm here just to clear out i don't know who to believe i just need to know so the person tried to interrogate us is this true is that true and both my wife and me were like uh cia agents what who when what do you want some coffee i need to tell you i need to now justify what your what your questions is so the person was asking me all sorts of accusations that was said about me i said how about i don't know why you're coming to bother me i have a very busy schedule how about instead of interrogating me go interrogate the person who told you that stuff so the person told you that i did a b and c let them prove that i actually did it now i need to prove myself i need to prove anything to anybody i need to prove myself to the gospel i don't need to prove myself to you right now you have demands to move towards me you want to you're going now you go and the person who asked you what are you asking me nevertheless the conversation ended by the person saying don't you want to clear up your name to prote you're protecting your name no not interested nobody's harming my name nobody's damaging my reputation nobody you can they can say whatever they want so this is exactly the the example here i don't need to go and now save my reputation why because this is exactly what it says here somebody said something against me now i look bad now all i need to do is turn the spotlight on the person who's actually wrong why i need to clear up my name i need to look good i don't want to look bad in front of everybody but then i settle better to let him say whatever he wants give me your mitzvah go to show did you wake up in the morning i should call the people who slammed me said did you wake up in the morning go to show go to show right now put filling on but do it with kavanagh yeah the mitzvah should be fat with a lot of juice but nevertheless i need to be very careful because the lashonara is very easy to fail when i have to protect my name or my honor or my status or anything so we concluded last week by saying nobody can touch anything of yours not your money not your other half nobody can touch anything that belongs to you have nothing to worry about nobody's able to somehow people say yeah but he's ruining my business nobody's ruining your business nobody's taking your money nobody's taking your customers nobody can touch anything that belongs to you and where do we learn that from exactly from korach i remember remember what i told you last week the camel wanted horns so they cut off his ears that's what happened to matuko he wanted something that doesn't belong to him not only that he didn't get it whatever he had was taken so you have nothing to worry about a lot of people say i have to protect my business my reputation my name i'm not going to be fine the other half schedule for my kids this is the thing that drives me the most crazy we have to do this and that we're not going to find the look for my kid but you think that somebody has somebody else has control if you're going to find a shidduch match to your kid that shows zero not this much zero trust in the kalosh boho so sometimes you see in communities people are you know rounding corners talking slandering why because now who i'm not going to find to my kid nonsense is the one who sends the shiddu hashem sends you sends you everything and you know what if sometimes you have to be a little bit degraded stepped on or your eagles should be a little bit thrown around the room nothing happened so what look at the perfect example when moshe rebels stands in front of all the nations comes with a political agenda with without facebook and he slanders him all over the face all over the place if you remember i told you there's a great sadiq called the moshe title baum he's known as the is mahmoshe is the founder of the hasidic movement that is called satmir and not only that from satmar came other khasid no now the name ran out of my mind no no satmer is the main khasi dude because that's the location vishni's sorry business and a few other bills it all came from the same place but the founder of all is a great rabbi called rabbi moshe title bound known to be a great sadiq he has in one of his books he's known as the is moshe not because his name is moshe rabbin muslim because his name is moshe because one of the stories that he says in his book as an introduction that he explains that he remembers all his past lives if you remember i told you this story numerous times especially in chanukah because he remembers being the incarnation of one of yaakov sheep that he gave is a masero i think i told you that story numerous times already but nevertheless he says that he remembers being in the argument in the clockett between moshe can you imagine not only remembering your incarnation but as a scene a scenario so of course his students tell him wow you were in the mach rocket at the time of the argument between moshe and kobach which side did you take so you tell them that yet was so strong everybody went with koa everybody so they kept on questioning which side did you take he said i was i didn't take any side i was nimna i was par middle i didn't take anybody that's how bad the yetzer i was that everybody went against moshe robino now imagine moshe roberto that has all the authority and all the power everybody goes against him his name is slandered all around the the community without face open without twitter now you would think that moshe roberto would right away put his elbows down knock on the table flick some fingers to get some heads chopped that's what any king will do masha rabeno falls on his face that's what the torah says he fell on his face and started crying why because he said maybe there's a chance of what he's saying is true this is the right way of doing it that's why he concludes here by saying don't you don't need to protect yourself unless you are really in a situation there are situations that you do in pikochnefish and many others now we're just laying down the rules but if a person is able to hold and not to fight back which our nate human nature is right away to slam back this person will earn to see the over the news this is something that as he says can't even fathom what that means so just by not reacting just imagine the great reward let's just conclude the light is on me now i look the bad one and i'm saying by me saying anything no nobody will get harmed and not only that nobody will be insulted anything even if they don't won't accept what i have to say it's still considered so in other words take a zipper sew it to your lips close the lips and just eat with a straw just go drink eat juices just drink juices that's it i told you last week when we started learning a young man came i heard you start gonna start to learn teaching which book are you gonna think from i told him from ah yeah i read that book i decided not to talk after that so but this is just a one we'll have to go through another class or two probably even maybe two about the rules i think we kind of covered the beginning of the rules hopefully uh you were able to memorize some of them and if not then you can watch the video but the thing is you have to remember the rules and the rules it doesn't matter if there's a damage there's no damage it's to protect yourself not to protect yourself i'm harming somebody i'm not harming somebody either way the major major part of the rules is what's what what's going to be the result is there benefit there's no benefit what's going to be the result and even if you think that you need to protect yourself you don't need to protect yourself don't worry nobody can harm you nobody can do anything to you against the will of hashem nobody can do nothing if somebody did something to you you can't be upset with the person who did that because it was already approved by the kalosh a person can't even move his finger like this unless it's allowed in the world above so if you said something about me it was approved by the heavenly court yeah you can say that don't accept accept that there's an insult as an attack accept doubt as uh okay let i need to humble myself i need to really look at myself and be very cautious how i behave how i talk how i present myself not accept it as an insult except it is a sign from the canon and needless to say a person is able to guard his mouth and his tongue he's guarding himself from all his problems most of the problems that we have is only because of our tongue and a lot of people don't like hearing that but the majority of problems that people have financial problems health problems marital problems emotional mental problems most of the problems that we have it's not from anything else it's from the sins that i do the damage that i do without my mouth as other shame hopefully hashem will enlighten us and inspire us to see things in them a clear light in a more holier manner that we can clear our tongue and talk and to know how important it is as we mentioned in the beginning that all the problems that we have as a nation are we are in exile because of i know a lot of people understood from the talmud that we're in because of sinatra because of baseless hate but the talmud explains in the xiaomi that it's only because when it says that's what our sages mean just want it to be soft on the ear here's one should be a wheel that we should be from the ones who are not messed up that we don't talk less and we know how to guard our tongue needless we bring on ourselves on our mind on our thoughts on our action on our speech and our family our house our kids our property and so forth and hashem should bless us all with great great enlightenment and we should be from the ones who are lighting up the world and not darkening the world with our horrible speech [Music] you