The 9 Days with Charlene

Welcome back to another episode of Shabbat Shalom. Although we typically talk about the parashah, we're going to talk about the nine days. This morning, Rosh Chodesh, [music] I had the zechut to lead a challah bake for kosher.com upstate [music] in South Fallsburg, and it was remarkable. It was so meaningful. It was so impactful. There was tears. There was laughter. It was incredible. And I got numerous messages asking me was the event recorded, and it was not. [music] But I do want to share one story that I gave over in the event [music] because it was just so well received, and it really encapsulates what the nine days really mean. I did an event in May about two months ago for a shabbaton for Hamaspik. [music] Now, I'm sure everybody here probably knows about Hamaspik. What an unbelievable, immeasurably chashuv organization. I've done events before for Hamaspik to help the mothers of Down syndrome children or parents of Down syndrome children. But this shabbaton was different. This shabbaton I was speaking directly to 30 or so Down syndrome girls. Now, I went on the shabbaton thinking, I'm going to be the one to inspire. I'm going to be the one to give and to be mechazek. I was completely wrong. I left that shabbat saying to my [music] husband, "My life is completely different because of these Hamaspik girls." I want to share one story that absolutely changed the way I view Judaism, Yiddishkeit, and the way I live my life. And it is all all the credit goes to these [music] wonderful, incredible girls. Now, these Down syndrome girls are beautiful, and vibrant, and funny, and so with it, and so high-functioning. But they've almost tapped into the secret of ahavat chinam in ways [music] that we we probably never could. But my eyes were open to the simple, pure, and beautiful way these [music] girls live their lives. We were sitting it was about around Shudashlish time [music] and I was giving, I don't know, the third or fourth of my lectures of my speeches and I said, "Girls, you know what? This one we're just going to make a shmooze." So I sat on a chair and the counselors of these 30 girls instructed all of them to just sit in a circle right around me. Now one of the girls, we're going to call her Malkie. She happened to have been a little upset about [music] something. So she went into the corner and she crossed her arms and she was grunting and upset. And [music] I looked at the counselors and I said, "What what should I do? Should I speak? But she's upset, she's not joining." And they said, "She'll come around. She She has to obey the rules. Don't worry, she'll eventually come around." As I was beginning to speak, one of the girls who was sitting right by my leg, tapped me on my leg and said, "But Malkie's sad." And I said, "I know Malkie's sad." She goes, "I have an idea." And she opened up her pouch. Now at the start of the Shabbaton, the incredible director, Henny Lang, Hashem should bless her with all the mazel and bracha and the most amazing shidduch in the world, she had made these really adorable positive reinforcement, positive affirmation coins, little cut-out cardboard coins, and she was just giving these out to the girls as the girls davened nicely, as they behaved nicely, as they cleaned up nicely, they would get more and more coins and they were very generous with the amount of coins they were giving. So each girl had a pouch with these coins in them. And the girl who was sitting to my right, tapped me on my leg and said, "But Malkie's sad." "I have an idea." And she opened up her pouch and she said, "I'm going to go give her my coins." And she picked herself up and she ran over to Malkie who was in the corner being really upset and she opened her pouch and said, "Malki, take these. They're for you." And Malki at first looked and said, "No, I don't want them." >> [music] >> But then all of a sudden the next girl got up and the next girl got up and the next girl got up until all the girls, almost all of them, had gotten up, opened their pouches and had run to give [music] their prized possessions, their beautiful coins, to this girl who was seemingly upset in the corner. Not only that, the circle was very full and there was really no more room left in the circle. But Malki was upset that there was no space for her. So the girls so so simple and so obvious, of course we're going to make room for you. And they brought Malki and they sat [music] her down right next to me and they all scooch over, made room, moved themselves around, backed up, went forward, crossed their legs until Malki was comfortably sitting right [music] next to me. I couldn't even finish my speech because I was so taken and I was crying and I was so moved by the pure baseless ahavat chinam of these girls. It was the most It was the most beautiful display of ahavat chinam I've ever seen and I was taught a lesson. A teacher was taught. And I remember [snorts] thinking, I'm a 44-year-old adult. I don't know if I would have run to the Malki in the corner and given her my coins and scooch over and made so much room for her. But these girls taught me the lesson that will be with me for the rest of my life. We are all stuck in galut >> [music] >> because we never paid attention to the Malkis, because we didn't make room for the Malkis, because we didn't share our coins with the Malkis. What if from now until Tisha B'Av, until Motzei Tisha B'Av, as our spiritual homework, we include the Malkis. We scooch over and make room for them and we offer them our coins just to give them a little bit of light, a little bit of hana'a, a smile, a little extension of kindness. >> [music] >> And I and I think that is the message of the nine days. We were not stuck in this galut because we were sinners and we were idol worshipers. We're stuck in galut because we just we rolled our eyes >> [music] >> and we ignored and we just dodged and avoided and ignored and excluded. That's why we're here. So, in order to be metakein that, let us all channel our inner hamaspik girls. And let us all recognize the Malkis [music] in the corner. And let us all selflessly scootch over to make room for them. This is literally and figuratively. And girls, between now and Motzei Shabbos, go the extra mile. Don't forward that screenshot. Don't spill the tea or that gossip you're chaleshing to say. Don't roll your eyes. Instead of judging someone, give them a bracha instead. [music] Maybe, just maybe, our little efforts, which are not so little to Hakadosh Baruchu, will be enough to change the fast of Tisha B'Av into the greatest Yom Tov of the year. Mashiach was born on Tisha B'Av and Be'ezrat Hashem, may it be [music] our May it be our zechut to witness that he reveals himself on this Tisha B'Av as well. I love you all. Wishing you I don't know if we're going to be recording another episode just because the fast is next week at the same time that our episodes air. So, in the event that this is this is my final message to you before Tisha B'Av, wishing you all a safe, healthy, meaningful, and impactful nine days. And don't forget your spiritual homework. Include the Malkis. Make room for them. Don't forward that screenshot. Hold back from that one thing you're chaleshing to say and [music] let Let be enough to Be'ezrat Hashem place that final brick in our long-awaited final home, our third we can make this with the coming of Messiah to come in here [music] up in the middle of the night. Love you all so much. I love you.