From Chaos to Serenity Dr Mordechai Weinberger

I I made it. Hold on. We are first benching left. [applause] >> Wait, hold on. The mic's not on yet. Your mic's not on yet. >> Hold on. Hold on. We're just getting the mic on. Still dominating. >> Now we don't hear you now. Louder. Louder. Louder. Louder. Loud. Oops. >> Sorry everyone. Just a second. Okay. >> They don't hear you. So you'll have to just talk. >> This mic's not working. >> Try it. >> Cool. >> Check one. Okay, perfect. So now go ahead. Let's see the knee. >> Okay, so the mother finished and now the tatim shield. Notice the perfect Superman father. Everything is perfect. There is no problem in the house at all. >> Chavez. Chavez. >> So, how was it when I was away? >> Quiet. >> You know what? Let's try this one. Your mics. Close your mic. Just take this one. >> Okay. Okay. >> It's yours. Give a second. Just technical stuff. Where are the other guys? >> Test test test. >> No. >> Okay. So, here we are. So chavas mind [laughter] I'm going through a lot I come to shul I feel so embarrassed last week out of Roman was still with me he came to ding I didn't like the way he dived, but at least he was with us. >> It's already a few days that we didn't see him. I don't know where he wandered off. I don't know what happened to him. >> It's just causing me chest pains. >> Going over there. >> I can't live like that. I always heard of stories of kids wandering off >> and it was a topic and something that was about someone. It's hitting me. Now it's hitting home and I feel like I'm lost. I'm so broken. Breaking a cold. Listen, Gingi, you spoke to anyone in >> Did you share with anyone in Shul? Did you see come or did he leave? Maybe he was there before. >> Maybe you didn't see no lights. So just talk about scream. >> Maybe you saw him in sh. Maybe you don't realize he was downstairs in the other minion. Believe me, I looked. I went up, down, looked for him all over, and he's nowhere to find. I'm starting to get worried. So, >> stop blaming him. Start blaming him now. >> Blame the husband. >> Yeah, blame the husband. It's all your fault. Of course, he's not coming to sh. You're mean to him. >> He's not coming to sh. How can you expect him to come to sh? There were days when you yourself didn't go to shi. >> Oh, louder. So, you know what I'm saying? So, the kids the kids see, you know, now you want to fix it because now he's getting older and you're worried about the daughter with the you should have thought about it years ago. I told you 100 years ago. So, why why you used to aggravate me? Now you're aggravating yourself because you're suffering before what you did. If he would see I have a she don't interrupt me. If he would see Okay, this is Mindy. Don't interrupt me. So if you would see you have a shar and be on time by three times a day by the fellows there wouldn't be this issue but anyways I feel with you I don't know what happened to Roman there's something wrong I noticed it as well >> I don't believe I don't believe this is the issue over here we see in blame >> her to accept >> I see in sure many kids that parents are not better than me and still the kids are there I believe if anything is to blame it's your too much being accepting >> mine. mind. >> Yes. >> That's not possible to be accepting. >> Tell I told you weeks ago that we have to put our foot down. This has to stop. When he started doing his monkey business, we should have put our foot down. That right and there I have a lot of things. I put my foot down. It would be first with you, not with the child. [applause] That's the problem. You didn't listen to me either. And he sees that in the house. When there's no shalom bias, it affects him also. Maybe let's we should really have a talk with him. That's the right way. What should we do with the curfew? Throw him out like he did Thursday night. We cannot do that again. >> You you we might need to be on the same page. >> But I think you have to admit that my mahalak is the real one. That's the one that's going to work. >> Being the way you want to be being so soft, too soft, giving in to him is not going to accomplish anything. But let's start the suda. >> [cheering] >> I [applause] love you. >> Is that you? >> What the? No, that's not my name. >> What? >> Pops, my name is A. I told you that 4,000 times. >> What happened to my kid? >> You're my child. >> This is what's for what's for what's for supper? >> I have I >> Oh, you did the Do the Jewish stuff. Do the Jewish stuff. Do the Jewish stuff. Vodka. >> Let me ask you. I have a few questions for you. [bell] >> Three days. I didn't see you. Now I see you with such a strange dress code. Where did you pick this up? >> Yo, my friends told me to dress up for the Sabbath. And I got myself some nice little digs here. [applause] Unbelievable. >> And I don't get hit by cars walking in the street. >> Is this Is this Is this what you >> No. No. That's not It's >> Is this acceptable to you? >> It's not acceptable. No. >> Acceptable to you. Is this acceptable to you? >> Let me tell you something. >> Sit down. Here. I'm the boss. This is my house. And you have to listen to me. >> Okay. Yes. >> Okay. >> Yep. Listen. >> And I I'll tell you something. And this is something you should keep in mind. You remember when I told you? You remember when I told you how we got out of Matrium said Ouamus. They didn't change their name, >> the language and their clothing. >> And you got all three. That's why we're in Gullet here. You see what he do? You change your name to what name? Ai. >> AB. >> Yeah. Deaf too. >> Yeah. Yeah, because in they >> you're remember that. >> Oh, named after >> I'm sure what what he has to go through with this. >> I know. Such a grandchild like me, he must be in Ghana. >> You know why we're in Gus? Because of you. >> Yo yo yo. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You. >> Hey. >> What's happening? >> What's up, Mimi? [applause and cheering] Yeah. Look at >> Yo, big man. What's doing? >> What happened to my kid? >> He's right here. >> Shabas. >> Where did you pick up such French? >> Well, I don't see what's What does it say to me? >> What's your name? What's your name? >> Google Shabas. Oh, I can do it. >> What? What's your name? >> What? >> I don't shake hands. >> I don't say. What's your name? >> You don't shake hands. Goes like this. It's not that difficult. I'm Mo >> the Yedish and Norman. >> Mo Yiddish. >> Moy >> Mo. [laughter] >> These people don't get it. >> No, >> don't get it. >> We're in Galas because of you. >> Why are we? >> Cuz you talk about people and you don't care about anybody's dignity. And I heard the way you talk about and their neighbors and my friends. Mo, you don't like Mo. >> What happened to Lashharil? You don't like any of that stuff. No respect. >> Respect your friend. Nobody invited. >> They like to pick and choose what you like to do. >> Nobody invited your friends. >> If you don't like him, >> you invited his friend. >> If you don't want him, you don't want me. >> I have to go to sh tomorrow >> and face people. >> All you care about is other people. Don't you care about your kid? >> I can't face anyone. I want to look my parents into their eyes. They'll >> Your parents can't even see past your chest. >> Don't worry about your parents so much. You got to care about me. >> I want >> the way you behave now. >> I couldn't care less. >> Can we get some spaghetti here? What's this? Oh, the fish. >> Oh, >> yeah. That's good work. >> No wonder people go off to Derek. >> You filter the fish. >> Cuz that's what your great grandmother had in Poland. >> And first thing I I'm going to I'm still the boss here, right? >> Right. >> You're a boss of nothing. >> Talk to Roman. Listen. Mommy wants to talk to you. You better listen. >> Okay, mommy. What do you want? >> You should try to relax. Let's try. >> Let's try to work this out in a civil in a civil manner. >> Yes. >> I know you can hear me. I love you so much. It's unbelievable the love that I have for you. But the friend really the friend is really not. >> You don't like him. You don't like >> I I like him, but he must have his own family. This mo guy. >> Yeah. You know what? >> A is my family. Oh, A >> is my family. >> He's my family. >> So then we're all family. >> But they can't go on like this. >> Yeah. All right. Maybe let's let's take a pause a second. How many of us recognize how similar this situation is happening of a tug-of-war? One pulling one way, one pulling the other way. Unfortunat >> we could just close our eyes. >> Exactly. Right now the bikes are pulling over. Let's take a step back. >> This is all pre-avi. >> Can we get the lights on stage? The guy in the back put on one switch. There's a switch right next to you. Right there in the back. Put on one switch. One. Hashi. That's No. Now >> I would like to take a little bit from A's model and put a visual to this demonstration. >> We don't need any mics. >> I would like us to realize that there are several points that affects a kip that when we talk to them, they're not hearing it. >> So one of them They've got a dragon and an alligator or a dinosaur eating them up. >> Another one is school. Most of them were not successful in school. >> [laughter] [applause and cheering] >> And therefore, if you walk around feeling I'm a failure, no one likes me, then we've got failure abuse. We've got school. >> Everything was off before and >> it's in the house. something here. >> The next one for us to realize is >> that most of most of the kids remember if there's a solid foundation they're comfortable wherever they are. So if there's an issue with they can't be success let's say there's a a diagnosis of anxiety, depression, learning disabilities that's besides for difficulty in school. They got something else telling them you're a failure. One of the biggest pains that they have [laughter] is friendship. If they feel accepted by friends, they will still say and the last one unfortunately is they come to the conclusion that Hashem hates them. Once they've given up that it's not working, there's nothing from Hashem, there's nothing, then unfortunately they start looking like this. in order to have one big image, >> we're going to have them hold this big dragon of what Hiddish kite looks like. So, the more that you two are trying to tell them how bad they are, maybe just even please shut the actual mics so I can plug those. >> The more we get that, the more pain there's going to be. I'd like to redo the same scenario without meeting AIA. It's now not Shabas. It's now Tuesday afternoon coming in right before and now we're worried about filling father and mother. It's before >> have your conversation or your fight and then let's have the before come in. for the past three days. You know where I put away at the designated spot, his spot over there. I put a $100 bill and three days at the same spot, exact same spot and the mommy is intact. No one even opened. Say louder. Knowing he would have used part of it to find the $20 and change it would be typical if you would have opened. >> Yeah. [whistles] >> This is so >> Yo, what's up? Huh? >> Hey, long time no see. >> Remember Mo >> is back. Whoa. >> Let me ask you a question. >> Yes. >> When did you last when did you last? [laughter] [applause] >> When did you last? >> By the way, that was a question. >> When did you last put on your >> When did you last stop asking me questions? >> You're not going to get any. >> Sit down. Sit down. >> Sit down. We can walk around. >> This can go on. >> I'm here for my friend. >> I ain't going nowhere. >> He doesn't need protection. >> He doesn't need your protection. He needs my protection. >> No, Gingi, don't stand up. You're too tall. >> That's your problem. That's your problem. >> This is your problem. >> This is not happening here. >> That's your problem. >> This is not happening here. Then you should leave. >> How you doing? >> Are you uncomfortable in this house? >> No, I am. >> You going? >> You around? I am. >> There's the door. >> The door is going to be for you. >> Or you? >> I don't know what you're talking about. [laughter] >> Okay, Ty. So you're happy I put on chilling every day. >> I came with the prize for you. >> Forget about >> you know what you lost now? >> $100. >> Did you think I lost $100? [laughter] >> I got a big secret for you. >> I got a big secret for you. Take your pants. I got your wallet. >> Yeah. I got a lot to lose. Got a lot. I told you how many weeks ago that I mentioned that we have to put our foot down. >> Just be careful where you put your foot. >> What time of day? >> You can't start setting up a house. One of the years with all the things that was going on. >> Yeah. Listen to her. She's smart. You got to be nice to her if you want to be nice to me. >> And besides, you can't put your foot down because it means you got to first take it out of your mouth >> or other places. This is This is not You're lucky. >> I'm lucky. It's good thing they're not here. [laughter] >> What time of the day do you pick up such friend? >> What time of the day? [laughter] >> What time of the day? >> What time of the day do I pick up such friends? >> Yes. >> What time of day? >> Tell me. You know what I'll tell you? >> You don't like my friends? Guess what? I don't like your friends. >> They're judgmental. >> But what we need? >> They're judgmental. >> First thing we need to do over here >> is get rid of your friends. >> Curfew. >> I'll do curfew after 8:00 at night. >> So you don't get to pick up. We can't make >> 8:00. >> 10:00. >> I won't be able to come up. >> Was it 1? Maybe 1:00. [laughter] >> 11:00. 11:00 >> you want to go his way. [laughter] [applause] >> It's me. You're giving in. This is where it starts. This is what I told you. >> He's going TO RUIN OUR ENTIRE HOUSE. ALL THE KIDS are going to see this and they're going to all learn from this. What's going to be? >> Do they realize we're sitting right here? >> Yeah. Hello. >> How you doing? >> Are you worried about all the kids turning out like me? Right. because they should all turn out like who? [laughter] [applause and cheering] >> There's no vision of this party that wears a Superman shirt. [laughter] >> I am the Superman party. That's what I did all my life. >> I have We have the rest of the family. Such a beautiful family. You're ruining the whole reputation. What's going to be with your What's going with the rest of us? >> Neighbors. >> The neighbors. Are you any sore neighbors books like this? [laughter] >> The neighbors. Yeah, they were talking about you, right? >> Oh, you have a terrible son. Such a terrible son. >> Don't tell them I >> You should only see what they're talking about you be in front of you and behind your back. >> Tell them I >> Listen to me. The first thing I got to I got to stop this. We got to stop this kind of friendships because this is ruining everything. He He did. Mo >> Mo is my friend. If you don't like him, you don't like me. >> I'm telling you, you stay at home. >> Hey, hey, hey. He doesn't have He doesn't need to hear this. >> Mo, you got to look for >> He doesn't need to hear your garbage. >> You got to look for someone else. >> Please. He doesn't need to hear this. [applause] >> How many of us could relate to the scenarios, both of them, over and over? Before BA >> before BA >> before >> A before A. >> Should we do one more example? >> Yeah. >> Drugs. >> Oh, all right. We'll pick we'll pick what mole >> we have to have now a very important conversation because when the mother was cleaning the room and going under the mattress and behind everything you have to say what mommy He's [laughter] not a good one. >> Baby, look at me. A [clears throat] >> Whoa. >> Yeah. [clears throat] >> Word. >> You want a puff? >> What's this? This is going to save your life because you're going to die of a heart attack from stress. >> I think I I think they have to decompose. You know >> where you know where you get what you're getting. What happened? I'm going to I'm going to throw it at you. Okay. All at once. getting ready for the >> mommy was cleaning. Mommy was cleaning your room for Shabas. >> AND WHAT YOU TOLD IN MY ROOM? >> I said you don't step foot IN MY ROOM. >> FOR SHABAS, WE HAD TO CLEAN IT UP FOR SHABAS. >> OH, you have to clean up for Shabas. >> Okay. >> Stop singing those stupid songs. >> You know this would be good. Lov chabas. [sighs] And we found >> we found pot in your room. Not this >> jewel pot. >> It wasn't this >> pot is in drugs. >> Is drugs in the drugs have to cop. >> You are always >> yo yo daddy. Daddy just have some of the ch I made for you. I think everything will work out. >> Wait till you Wait till you get Wait till you get the potato. [laughter] >> Drugs in there. >> I don't know what it's like. >> The rule of the house is not going to work. >> Oh, the rule. >> You know what you need? You sound like you need a stiff drink. >> Do me a favor. Write up all the rules. >> This is my house and I'm the boss. I set the rules >> and you got to listen. It's either my way or the highway. >> Out the door. >> Cars outside. >> You got to call the cops. It's what we do. >> Let's do one more. >> Unfiltered internet. And what you're going to be doing in the room. >> Oh boy. >> No props for that. It's party time. >> I want to ask you something. >> I told you my name ain't no Call me like a normal person, >> That was a video. >> I'm trying to remember. >> AB AB. Do we need Do we need this stuff? Do we need this? >> He's in here. >> AB, I have another question for you. >> So many. What is this tonight? I saw you came in with something hanging out of your belt that I did not buy for you. I didn't get you. Where? >> Maybe you should have said that. It's a phone. >> Phone. He had a phone. >> I did not see the sign outside. That's spam. Not without that. First of all, we're >> How did you get it? Because I didn't give you money. I I'm very I'm very careful not to give you a penny. I broke into >> the $100 in your film is still there. The and I don't give you a penny. Where did you get that money to buy it? >> It's like the mun >> and this is >> good. Money. Got it. >> But this is this is something that shall not go on. HE'S BRINGING IT INTO THE HOUSE. ALL BECAUSE OF YOU. [laughter] >> YEAH, it's all because OF HER. >> YOU ALLOWED IT. >> She paid for it >> by being so soft. >> She paid for it with your money that she stole from your wallet. [laughter] >> And I have a big secret for you. >> I have a big secret for you. >> By the way, it's Kosha. There's a lot of big rabbis on that thing. >> I got it from your desk. >> You remember those stories we heard about the kids down the block? >> Yeah. >> Where am I going to take my >> All right. So now what we're going to do is we are going to imagine that these two wonderful this wonderful couple had the honor of meeting Abby. [applause] [applause] There are two things that we are going to be discussing. Number one, to realize that each of these two best friends are really kips kids in pain, which are phenomenal hearts, but they're in severe pain. I know there are supposed to be three bombs in this system, but here we are going to give one bomb to him, and everyone is going to be walking out with this bomb thanks [applause] to this. So now you guys are talking What are some of the information that you have learned? >> No, you guys can go in and then come back and we'll see how you guys come back. >> So now let's go. So imagine you guys went to a if we have to now have the same conversation about let's say coming in and with his friends. How would we do it with a twisted parenting concept? >> Here we are. >> Are we coming to change? We're not getting anywhere. We're lost and there's no way we can manage that. It's just getting worse. There's no way. We have no hand. We have no control. We finally got to that point learning and realizing that we started as a guy who guides parents and get the connection back and their kids. Hopefully They turn back. They turn and they get out of their pain and they get them to live again. [applause] >> So now what would happen? What preparation would you have after your ding and you're coming home from your A is going to come in? >> So I wish that will feel somewhere wherever he is feels my towards him and my feelings that I feel sorry for him and and upon him upon him he feels the same way to us and hopefully remotely he gets the message and starts missing home and coming home hopefully comes by so we'll be able to show to him and prove to him our love >> Aby [applause] what did what did Aby Hey, I can say gachas or how should I? >> No, no, no. Hey, what's happen? >> I like you. [applause] >> This is my the best day of my life. You're finally back in my life. I am so happy for coming by. [applause] [cheering] [applause] How are you? And say say HELLO TO MO. >> HELLO. YOU'RE HERE. >> YO, AWESOME. >> YOU KNOW, >> you're welcome. >> Hey, YOU GOT THE [laughter] BEST PARENTS, BABY. [applause] >> Have a seat. Have a seat. >> Fit with us. Come eat with us. Have a good meal. You have more friends. [applause] >> They're coming over later for the dessert. >> For the butter. We have a butter. >> Butter. What? >> Party time. Party time. Where's the good stuff? >> Where's the good stuff? Where's the good stuff? >> You know, m time. >> Oh, we got the good stuff. >> Oh, baby. >> This is going to be great tonight. >> Is that okay? >> Yeah. >> Sure. >> I hear you have more. >> Really? >> Come on. One [cheering] more. Sure. Sure. >> Mommy [applause] and Taty with love. And give one to your friend, too. [laughter] >> Yo. Hey. Share with your friend. Share with your friend. Oh, you're so nice. You're the best person. I I told you he had a heart of gold. >> Don't you love this outfit? Ty is beautiful. >> Yeah. >> Wow. It's so reflection. >> That's exactly what he told us. >> That's exactly That's him. I see him. >> Yeah. >> I can see this guy. >> I I don't know if we need all of this stuff. >> One's enough. I think one. >> Okay. We can Can we get it later if we want? >> You made my day. What made you decide to come home again? >> Oh, it's the best place to be. You kidding me? >> Nobody else wants us. >> Wow. I'm so thrilled. [applause] >> What do you got all this? >> I wish I wish I wish I had somewhere to go, you know? I wish I had >> We went to his house and they told us that that >> they don't want us. >> Oh man. >> You remember when I used to lock the doors at night? No more. >> Ain't happening again. You're always welcome 24/7. This is your house. [applause] Wow. I told you this Abby guy is great. [laughter] >> No more. >> I wish my parents would go to Amy. >> This aby guy is great. >> So, um, just is it okay if if Mo cuz he has no place to live? >> No pressure. Okay. >> It's all right. I mean, last time you said he's going to steal from you and you hid the silver. >> I gave almost everything back. >> Obviously, >> we didn't hide the silver. We gave the silver into praise. All right. So, >> Amy, I want to show you something. How much we really love you and we thought of you >> and we had to walk. We had no way. We went all the way to to walking. >> No, that's not what this is. >> Don't touch it. M. >> Why you got to do that? >> I'll tell you something. I'll tell you something. There was once a big king and he had a son and the son went off. And then far away and he came back far away. >> I have a secret for you, okay? But I didn't tell you. Mommy told me not to tell you and Avi said I shouldn't. It's supposed to be cold. Be very careful because this is a bomb. >> But it's not not something that's exploding. We you know but we learned that we didn't >> time bump >> it's a time bump time bump especially for this time >> and it really >> I don't know about this >> fishy to me >> scary >> you know what's inside [laughter] you know what's inside in here I can't touch it I left it on the table for you but it's a 60in TV >> the game's on channels. >> A 60inch TV. >> Yeah. Unfiltered. >> What's a TV? >> Unfiltered. >> TV in Netflix. Who know? >> Netflix. Yeah. Know about Netflix. Something to flick. >> Wow. >> Something to fix. >> What's good for me? >> Yeah. For you and for your friends. >> Because we love you. Because we love you. >> We have the easy chairs also with the with the bears. >> We're going to get the easy chair, baby. From now on, nothing stands between us. >> Nothing. >> Wow. >> Wow. [applause] >> Hug. Hug. >> One more thing. >> Hold on. Hold on. I I got to give him a hug, too. >> Hug. >> Tommy, you want to give him a hug? >> No, it's okay. >> Okay. Okay. [laughter] >> Now, let's redo the same situation now about Phillip. So somehow you're having a conversation and you're coming out that you just came back from sh >> and I guess a thing. Oh, you can ask me now about filling. Let's see what happens. >> Is it ba or >> Oh, this is after >> it wouldn't come up. >> Okay, let's see you come. You just said you just came back from sh. So the kip is going to assume Oh, you want to tell me about spiller now? >> I'm talking just came back from show. >> Good morning. I had some wonderful. >> Why are we up? >> Yeah, we're not we're not up in morning. >> Why are we here? [laughter] >> It's 6:45 p.m. >> Morning, mama. He just came home from >> I have a better one. Watch this one. >> Yeah. >> Yo. Um, pops. Mom, guess what? Today when I got up, I uh I put on film. >> That's nice. >> That's very nice. Very nice. >> Oh, I thought you'd be happy. >> So, how did that make you feel? >> We're [applause and cheering] >> Hello. >> But we're happy if you're happy. >> Let's try that again. [laughter] Take two. >> So yo, uh pop mom I uh just you know today I don't know whatever I just saw my tune over there and I I decided to put on thrilling. >> It's about to [laughter] >> try one more time. [laughter] >> So you'll pass. >> So in other words, that $100 is not there anymore. [laughter] >> It's been six years, you know. >> Oh yeah. Good. >> Very, very exciting. >> It's very nice of you. >> Nice of me. >> That's what makes you happy, huh? >> No. Nothing. >> Why do you Why do you even bother with these people? >> That's nice of me. He didn't say I'm nice in 12 years. Now I'm nice cuz I >> Oh, yeah. I got it. I screwed up again. [laughter] >> How do I have to connect? I'm coming. >> Go to the bathroom. >> Go to the bathroom. [laughter] You got to go to the bathroom. >> Yo, why is your dad in the bathroom the last 4 and 1/2 hours? >> As soon as I mentioned to him that I'm happy what he did, he did it on his own. But as soon as I mentioned how happy I am, that's when it go got out of hand. >> Yeah, cuz I told you that when he does something good, you should say, >> "How does that make you feel? >> You idiot." [laughter] >> Go back. He went to the bathroom at that lecture. >> Uhhuh. [laughter] So, how's this make you feel? >> How did it make you feel? >> Oh, >> so, uh, you know, whatever. I put on those strapping things that you keep keep money. >> Are we back with this? >> So, tell me, how did it make you feel? [applause] first of all made me feel that you're not learning disabled anymore. You figured out the answer. Um, yeah, whatever. Let's go. It was good. It was all right. It was good. >> Really felt that connection. >> All right. >> Now, we'd like to stand the L. Hang on. The ladies know what the next line is. >> Oh, that's I'm sorry. There's another line. >> How does it make you feel? Oh, it made me feel okay. Whatever makes you feel What would you like for breakfast? >> Okay. >> All right, everyone. [applause] >> Thank you to Weinberger. [applause] >> And great job. >> Thank you. I want to thank everyone for being creative. >> Let's >> hold on. Wait one minute. I want to finish with Ali. >> It's up to you. >> Yes. >> The the wash is on me. >> So, I'd like to finish with two messages. One, if Abby can summarize what was the before and after, how it made him feel. And number two, a message from our perfect Superman father, the before and after that learned the vulnerability, how to change, what would be the two parting messages that we would want to give? Yo, so you know I um you know so I was I was feeling real real out of family and like I was a homeless you know like my my pop he don't like me like the other kids and like maybe I was feeling maybe like a mistake you know like uh like maybe the I saw I saw my mommy uh Mindy in pain. I saw her crying so much all the time and like, you know, and I'm thinking like, you know, yo, I don't hurt nobody in my life. I just want to live and be free and just, you know, I I'm not Hitler. And she's crying like I'm the worst thing in the world. I was feeling really bad about myself and uh some of my friends gave me some stuff, you know, so you don't got to be feeling that way all the time. So I got into the stuff that you know just don't you know makes me makes you just you know makes you say you know a lot [laughter] you know and I I'd rather you know just say you know than than cuz the before that you know I was just saying I don't know so now I know you know and um and then I don't really really care that they don't you know they don't like me you know so they got like other kids they like. And I got I got my people. I got Mo and I got, you know, all kinds of people that I don't, you know, I don't really know their names, but they're my they're my best friends, you know, and when I need stuff, I you know, I I I go to my I go to my peeps and they're always there for me. They always like and they go they always say like, you know, like, "Yo, so happy to see you." They smile. I come home and they're always crying and always go crying and I don't know, you know, I don't remember growing up always hearing about the za and the bubba so much. Now whenever I'm around the zida and the ba like they yo, you know, they became like a big part of this family over here then and so I felt a lot of guilt, you know, that I'm hurting them because deep down I don't want to be hurting anybody. And uh so the guilt really made me feel like I don't belong, you know. So I got I was just looking for a place to belong and I settled for like friends like you know they're not like you know like Mo like what's Mo you know [laughter] but whatever he's a guy you know so I you know you whatever and and since my parents you know they changed so first I thought like you know I I thought like aliens abducted them because they they look like these still mean Jewish you know dudes foods and then all of a sudden they're like they're like nice, you know? So, I thought maybe they went out of town a little bit and they just started being like nice people. And um then my friend told me, you know, maybe they go off to Derek themselves. I don't know. [laughter] It's confusing. I don't I started getting these gifts and I thought maybe one of them has cancer or something. [laughter] I don't know. It was very confusing. And then, you know, I felt like, you know, they give me money and they they give me hugs. You know, my father, you know, he's he's a big dude. You know, in the beginning, I I didn't really like getting squashed like that. You know, you could imagine. But, you know, after a while, I just realized like, you know, these people, they they care about me, you know. And then over time I realized that those other people, you know, like, you know, Diego, the guy in front of the grocery place that gives me the cigarettes for free and all my drug peeps, you know, they don't really care about me, you know. So, I started feeling a little bit more comfortable to hang out here at home. And I think that we're settling our differences and they're getting used to the fact that God gave them the wrong kid. and uh I got dropped off by the wrong house and we're just trying to make, you know, the best of it, you know. So now I think things are a little bit better and I'm just a little scared cuz I never know when these bipolar parents are going to switch back and, you know, go to some other dude who's going to say bunch of yiddish and var and whatever. But for now, we think we we got a good relationship going. And uh the truth truth truth of the matter is that you know deep down I know that one day one day this is going to come off you know this is not the real me and after so many hugs and feeling comfortable they're kind of my heroes you know like I know one day if I ever [applause] [applause and cheering] and And in how we got our Avi bag. [applause] >> Thank you all. Now they have for the women. It's 5:00. There's something that started. >> Oh, beautiful. [applause] >> Watch yourself, pops.