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Why psychologists admit you should keep this Jewish practice

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Jewish Educational Media | The Lubavitcher Rebbe avatar
Jewish Educational Media | The Lubavitcher Rebbe

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The verse states: “A man shall leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife.” This is for a purpose – so that “they may become one flesh,” and “be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth.” The marital relationship can’t consist only of intimacy; The marital relationship can’t consist only of intimacy; and it can’t consist only of separation. Rather, both separation and intimacy are necessary. This is set out in the laws, practices, and customs This is set out in the laws, practices, and customs associated with “Family Purity,” a practice that promotes marital harmony. a practice that promotes marital harmony. Some mistakenly believe that it separates. Quite the contrary: This is the way to true peace and closeness. Doctors and psychologists have recently recognized this, as well. But this isn’t the reason to practice Family Purity. The reason is that God “sanctified us with his commandments” Such a union results in holy offspring. The children live according to Torah, whose “ways are pleasant and all its paths are peace.” In our generation it is especially necessary to promote peace between parents and children. People complain, especially in the United States, that parents and children cannot see eye-to-eye. There is a generation gap between the youth and the elders and between the youth and their fathers and mothers. Family Purity brings harmony because such a home is built – Family Purity brings harmony because such a home is built – even before the child is born, the parents act even before the child is born, the parents act in accordance to Torah, whose paths are peaceful. This creates a “vessel to contain God’s blessings” in everything one needs. This is a second lesson with regard to activities to promote Family Purity. It’s important to point out specifically that although it may seem, as the Evil Inclination may claim, that these laws create separation and distance, we explain that “the left hand rejects,” and “abandons for a moment” so that “the right hand may draw close” and “gather in with great mercy.” This is true of the supernal husband and wife, God and the Jewish people; we observe the same dynamic between husband and wife, that after separation, the closeness is much greater. That is the result of keeping these laws. When we speak of charity and communal funds, some people protest: How can we? Some people require financial assistance for their basic needs. How can we take some of those funds, and use them for mitzvos? And especially not for such a mitzvah the building of a mikvah which is only meant for married women, and so on. How can we use communal funds for this? The explanation: The Almighty is a “compassionate, gracious God”; and on the contrary, the reason that some people are kind is because they emulate the Almighty. God’s attribute of loving-kindness and compassion enables people to possess that same quality. When God commands us to observe this practice, and He creates strict laws regarding it with the various details specified throughout Torah, this itself demonstrates that true compassion, intimacy, love, and kindness is attained by following this practice. Some think this practice applies only to women, only at specific times, but in fact, Family Purity affects one’s future children, and their children, and grandchildren, until the end of time, enabling them to reach the “resemblance God,” so that they will be good people. They will be born with fine character traits by nature, which, with the proper education, will develop further according to Torah. And this is why Family Purity is so vital. Although it begins at a particular time, with a particular individual, it affects and establishes a generation – in fact, many generations, until the end of time – bringing the world to be civilized, making it a fitting place, bringing the world to be civilized, making it a fitting place, “A dwelling place for God in the lower realms.” Beginning from “God dwelling in our midst” – within every single Jew, and within every Jewish home. Moreover, there is the famous halachic ruling written in the earlier halachic works and cited in the later ones that one may, and must, sell a synagogue, if there is no other way to build a mikvah, for it will establish generations among the Jewish people who will pray, build synagogues and houses of Torah study, and fulfill mitzvos. This will make unnecessary all the effort at certain other times and places to save our young people. This mitzvah is especially relevant in our times, to establish fully kosher mikvos and women’s groups which will promote awareness of the tremendous importance of this mitzvah; that it is a foundation for good children and for parents to share lives of peace and closeness, a life based on Torah and mitzvos When one makes a firm resolution on the matter, “God connects the good thought to action.”