It's Not in My World | Rabbi Eytan Feiner

Your next door neighbor just bought himself a beautiful red brand-new Ferrari. And you’re looking over and you can't help but think: I wish I had such a Ferrari. Whatever your choice, maybe it's the latest Rolls-Royce, maybe it's a 4-door black BMW. But how can HaKadosh Baruch Hu tell me, and the pages of the תורה הקדושה in Parshas Yisro, part of the Decalogue, part of the עשרת הדיברות, number ten. And if it's number ten, we know, It's got to be a biggie and you bet it is. HaKadosh Baruch Hu, what do you want from me? I want that BMW, I want the Ferrari. Your friend just built a mansion, how could you hold yourself back out on the world? Can I control my emotions? How can I control what I see and how I feel and how to respond to everything that my eyes behold? So the answer, of course, is an unbelievably powerful Vort of the Ibn Ezra, one of our גדולי ראשונים. The Ibn Ezra says that אנשים רבים תמהים, he says so many people, the world over, we all wonder how in the world can Hashem command me something that's pertaining, that's germane to my emotions? How can I control my emotional state? Whether it's that Ferrari, the BMW, the car, maybe it's the mansion, or maybe it's that woman walking down the street and the way she's dressed, and what about that billboard? Hashem, what do you want from me? How can I control? This is how you made me. This is my Yetzer Hara. How do I control it? Explains the Ibn Ezra, The same way when you have an איש כפרי, a regular pashute person, a regular individual coming from a village and he sees the princess coming along, he knows he's not going to look at that princess, thinking for a second: Oh, one day she's going to be mine. He knows he has no שייכות. It's out of his purview. It's not on his radar screens, ever think of marrying that woman one day. Explains the Ibn Ezra: That's how we do it. How do we overcome לא תחמוד? The answer, of course, is it's in an עולם שאינו שלי, it's not in my world. If God wants me to have that Ferrari, wants me to have that home, that BMW, then HaKadosh Baruch Hu, the Divine Puppeteer, כביכול, he’s orchestrating every single day of our lives. Gemara in Chulin 7, a person is not even lifting up his finger unless Hashem decrees it to be so. We have to trust HaKadosh Baruch Hu, work continuously on Emunah and Bitachon, on our faith and our trust in the Almighty above, that anything we need, Hashem's going to provide for us. And if that woman's walking down the street and we know we're married or you're single and you know that that's a woman you're never going to marry, why look? It's no שייכות, no connection to you. It should be in the same context, from the same perspective, as an איש כפרי, as a regular, normal, typical villager looking at the queen, looking at the princess. Different leagues, different worlds. No שייכות, no connection. HaKadosh Baruch Hu will give you every single thing that you need. But when we walk down the street, we got to realize, and Vayimaen is embedding that in our psyche, engraining that in our heart and mind every single day of the week. If HaKadosh Baruch Hu wants this person, in this case, this woman... Let HaKadosh Baruch Hu decide who you're going to marry. You already have your wife. Otherwise those women, they're off limits. No שייכות, no connection. All going back to that Ibn Ezra לא תחמוד. If Hashem wants you to have it, you'll have it. And if Hashem doesn't want you to have it, you don't have it because you don't need it. Trust the Boreh Olam. You'll get everything you need. Don't bother looking elsewhere. Hatzlacha and Bracha.