Is Your Bed Holy or Impure? - JEWISH INTIMACY (18)

what happens if the seed of a plant has a small microscopic black dot on it needless to say what happens if seed of a man also has some black dot on it the sage has spend an extraordinary amount of energy teaching us about the seed of man where it comes from why who is there anything we can do about that Society has changed drastically we see that people think the opposite of what historically they have is there anything we can do about that whether it's terrorism anti-Semitism the deformed mentality of the lgbtq and all the types of liberal types of mentalities out there things have changed what does it have to do with the seed and even more so does any of it connect to the Mitzvah of turning our beds after somebody dies why do we turn our beds this and much more is going to be answered tonight and of hasm is going to inspire you educate you and invigorate you to be holy because hm is Holy [Music] we're back here on our Tuesday night Jewish intimacy series based on the sees by the raan written about 750 years ago tonight's sh will be for the for Sana s and all of is and all the righteous no that continue to contribute and help us do all the wonderful things that the organization is doing anyone that wants to help us by sponsoring one of these lectures can go to our website be.org that's b z r a t h a h.org it'll be in the description uh and um you could go and donate over there sponsor Shure or if you want to help us feed the poor in Israel during the uh upcoming holiday of Pim uh go to a designated website that we made for it uh like we do each year bh.org B is in beat H is in Hashem and puim is p m.org over there you can contribute as much as you'd like to fulfill the Mitzvah of helping us uh feeding the poor in Israel uh certainly one the obligations of pulling all together uh so last year we were able to feed quite a few people we were're able to raise around 70 uh 70,000 or so the year before that we did about 100,000 hopefully B this year we'll be able to uh raise 200,000 uh because there's a lot more people and one of the things that we're uh uh trying to do this year is something that we've never done before which is actually to have all of these wonderful uh uh aim these Torah Scholars that uh happen to have also a lot of struggles in regards to financials study Torah for all of for the sake of all the donors on that uh Friday for two hours and each one that comes and studies gets uh some money for puim so both you end up benefiting in uh feeding the poor on puim fulfilling that Mitzvah but also uh getting uh Torah learned uh due to your efforts so anyone that does it certainly benit benefits a lot more than any other time in previous years the more you donate the more obviously you're sponsoring to study for you so uh with that being said we have a fantastic news where the uh new book uh my new book is now in uh being printed we're uh finalizing details on the uh quantity and everything we're going to be Distributing this once it comes to uh Israel and to the United States uh everywhere it's in Hebrew only currently but anyone that uh wants to sponsor copies of the book uh and thereby get it obviously for uh the uh the huge discount uh can sponsor a th000 copies 5,000 copies 10,000 copies whatever they want anyone that wants to do it please let us know this is BM ready and uh getting ready bash so the first book bash had a lot of success we uh distributed did uh somewhere around uh I believe it was 15,000 copies uh for free uh and uh we're looking to do at least double that if not triple that with this uh second book since it covers uh every single Paras in the Torah lot of new insights lot of interesting things andm we'll also be working on an English version of the books in the coming year uh so uh with that we have uh our probably the the most difficult series that we've ever done is this series the series of Jewish intimacy uh mainly because uh it's there is a obligation for a person that wants to have uh you know his not just theoretically but uh also in his actions to be very careful with the language that they use not to use the common fresh language uh not to uh discount the issue not to use uh inappropriate uh uh Behavior or language uh but even more so because this particular uh uh Series has a lot of cabala uh in it uh naturally speaking it there's just an enormous amount of cabala there's probably more cabala that we've learned and taught uh throughout these first 17 uh lectures of this series then uh all of the sh which is at this point thousands of uh lectures that we've done over the years uh combined uh so there's a lot of interesting things in it I um highly recommend that anyone that is actually listening to these to do everything they possibly can to apply at least some of the stuff that you're learning because it's just one of those things where you have a extraordinary prize uh in front of you but you're only going to realize it's a treasure that once you actually apply it you know when you look at it when you hear it many times it sounds like it's too much many times it sounds like it's impossible it's far away from you but believe me that uh this is uh one of those things where uh many people uh if not all people can do at least some of it if not all of it uh you know at least what we've learned so far so in the last lecture the ramban taught us about the significance of intimacy between a husband and wife during Shabbat where even though there are obligations to for the husband and the wife to be intimate during the time specific times such as the time of the night of the mikve uh this is uh if if a uh husband and wife have uh love among them and or between them and uh they have uh really the right uh uh spiritual chemistry between them where the husband is constantly letting his wife know how beautiful she is how amazing she is how wonderful and how grateful she he is to her uh literally doesn't have to have a reason uh to do it but he's constantly looking for ways to make sure that his wife feels like she is the princess of all princesses in his eyes uh that uh the world simp his world simply would be uh almost uh uh you know uh non-existent uh if she was missing while on the other hand the the woman the wife is constantly giving her husband the support that he needs uh the the cavod that he needs of how she's appreciative of everything that he does whether it be uh making money or the fact that he's learning tah or both or he's just a very good and supportive husband there's no uh shortage of reasons of why you need to appreciate each other and I think that's one of the main things that's lacking in most relationships where a lot of the excitement is wasted on the initial parts of a relationship when people are about to get married you know you have the flowers and you have the presents and you have the party and then you end up feeding a bunch of strangers that your parents and your grandparents invited for the wedding and then you know life sets in you settle in and then little by little the relationship deteriorates and sometimes it's not even little by little many times people are already asking about whether uh they are allowed to get a divorce uh within the first year uh because they simply don't realize that it the the wife or the husband is not the problem you are the person that's asking the question not knowing how to be that husband not knowing how to be that uh wife that you're supposed to and many times it's because of not knowing how to be generous with words how to be generous with compliments how to be appreciative uh of the things that perhaps you take for granted now if we are unappreciative with the ones that we're supposed to express the most amount of love to needless to say we are unappreciative and uh to the point of just thinking that it's uh strange when I tell you that you have to start viewing the furniture in your house specifically the bed in your house as a holy tool now the traditional mentality is so far away from this where to look at a bed as if it's holy seems so farfetched so foreign to us that you're you're trying to question whether the speaker is insane delusional uh perhaps he's from a different time but no I'm here I'm I'm I'm normal and I promise you I live in a same year as you do and I came from the same place as you did but the reality is that once you learn the words of the sages as we're going to learn tonight you're going to start viewing things very differently and start appreciating things very differently and hopefully this type of lecture will inspire you to start appreciating not just your bed but appreciating the one that's with you in that bed uh the uh all the things that come out of that bed as a result as literally special tools holy tools that you are able to now sanctify hashem's name and serve him now the ran has taught us that there's a auspicious time to be intimate the time of the mikve time before someone travels for an extended period of time and certainly the time of Shabbat and the holidays the Jewish holidays now the Torah Scholars that really want to elevate themselves above and beyond the uh the norm uh specifically uh you know make sure to preserve themselves only for Shabbat you know with the exception of the obligations they only are intimate during Shabbat whereas the rest of the people out there are uh you know doing obviously their their intimate throughout the week as well which again there's no problem the only thing that we would add to it is that you can still sanctify that o act by making sure to do it at a specific time which we've discussed in the previous lectures that is after after the middle of the night which we're going to get deep deeper into later on in the series of why there's such a significance during this time and not 8:00 at night or 4:00 in the afternoon or perhaps even uh you know 8:00 in the morning breakfast why why is it that the middle of the night is such a special time that's something we're going to get into later on but after letting us know that Shabbat Shabbat is the foundation of creation Shabbat is a is one of the uh critical tools that Hashem instilled into this world to keep it alive because as Society both Jew and Gentile continue to sin and desecrate God's name on a regular bases whether it be today or in previous generations the world has to constantly find new energy in order to have life just like a person has to eat and drink the world has to eat and drink but you know all bite spiritually so how do you uh how do you eat and drink when the life is constantly sucked out of you by the creation of your creator the one way that hasem put into it aside from bringing theim the especially righteous people is putting a special day that the entire world stands on which is Shabbat and this Shabbat is in essence one of the energy sources of this world that gives us a new found life each and every single week not that it erases the sins of the past week because you know sins are not just erased just because time has passed it's not like uh the the common saying of you know a uh time heal all wounds this is not a reality this is just a nice statement that people would like to believe but in reality the time does not heal all wounds you have a uh uh certain things that if you don't know how to deal with them will permanently hurt you like I have this uh uh ant who uh just passed away uh that uh Al Shalom she uh she had a uh several children and uh her youngest son uh a youngest son uh passed away young he had uh cancer and I remember him when I was a kid in Israel and uh he was a good friend of my fathers his name was Yosi and uh you know he was a young handsome guy go-getter and he got cancer when he was still very young I believe he was still maybe in early 20s uh and uh you know he beat it the first time time but then when it came back uh there was nothing to beat simply it uh it it killed him and he left this world now his mom never got over it and when I say she never got over it I literally mean that until her dying day I mean she was in I believe the last year or so she was in practically in a coma but until that so long as she was functioning and living in our home every single day for the last 35 40 years she would go into his room fold his clothes do laundry make the bed as if he's alive and cry so and I'm sure that some of you have heard horrible stories like this where some traumatizing experience that a person dealt with whether it be death of a loved one or other types of trauma there's no shortage of traumas out there that literally a person simply could not get over with could not get over it and uh you know now if you're going to mention yeah but even yov ainu yobu was not able to get over the you know the uh the death of ysf when he thought he was dead the reason why Yu and his great Holiness was not able to get over it was because his n knew that YF is not dead and although hasem programmed us to uh naturally get over uh the the loss of a of a loved one after a year his Nish was not able to do it because the Nish knew that he's still alive so simply couldn't get over it so it's very different than the story I'm telling you about my aunt or anybody else that you know perhaps even yourself now a person has to have the right Tools in order to build what he wants to build a person has to have the right Tools in order to handle the different obstacles in life and if a person doesn't have the right Tools in order to deal with the trials and tribulations of Life there simply could suffer from the same exact thing even though it stopped being relevant for decades now one of the things that we see in in many marriages is that uh especially the ones that are uh have uh you know gotone to a point of uh what seems to be no return is that uh the fighting becomes the standard the love is no longer existent it seems like the two people hate each other but they're simply living with each other out of convenience it seems like there is uh no uh uh recovery possible out of it but the truth is is is that the recovery is still possible if they wanted to recover and when I say if they wanted to recover I mean if they're willing to do what's necessary in order for it to recover many times people will go to different types of consultants and psychiatrist and uh all types of family therapy in order to try to fix things that you could really do for free and the number one thing that a person can do in order to fix their relationship regardless with who it is whether it's their relationship with their spouse their relationship with their children their relationship with their Rabbi their relationship with their employees with their boss number one thing that you can do in order to repair relationships is to show constant appreciation without expecting anything in return but the beautiful part is is that when you start showing people constant appreciation eventually they're going to believe that you truly appreciate them initially if you've never showed enough appreciation they're not really going to appreciate it they're not going to believe you if you've never complimented your wife you've never complimented your Rabbi uh unless some strange thing happened in reality they're not going to uh you know take it uh seriously they're going to think you're just joking they're going to think it's uh you think it's funny and sometimes they'll even take it offensively because they'll think you're making fun of them that in essence you're saying the opposite of what you're really saying so but when a person is constantly complimenting and showing appreciation and gratit at itude for that person and if you really think about it you'll find plenty of reasons to be grateful to those people that love you and the people that you love because if they love you that's already more than enough reason for you to appreciate them if they help you in any way shape or form even if it's simply making you food or even lending you a pen if a person truly understands the depth of appreciation they would literally appreciate a person that lent them a pen for the rest of their life but if a person doesn't know that doesn't doesn't understand the value of appreciation then they'll even forget to appreciate the person that gave them a life a marriage children uh gave them a a job gave them a uh literally everything and anything that they could possibly have they'll forget it so it's important and critical really for a person to be very generous especially since it doesn't really cost money to be generous with words to be generous with those that you love if you want that relationship to prosper and needless to say if you want that relationship to be fixed but if you're not willing to be generous with compliments then in so many words you are choosing your own misery you are choosing to drink the poison you are choosing to live with the consequences and unfortunately we're not even allowed to be merciful on you why because you're not allowed to be worful on people that are considered crazy and a person that does not take these words to heart is certainly considered crazy so now with that being said the ran told us that we have to appreciate the Shabbat as not only a holy day between us and God in the day that Hashem rested a day that uh we became a unique Nation if you will that is only the only nation that's allowed to observe the Shabbat is the Jewish Nation this was a special gift that hasem gave to the Jewish people as thear in m Shabbat says in the beginning of the tractate the first chapter but even more so the ran is now taking us to the next level he's taking us to something further and now he's going to tell us about the uh it's in so many words ending this chap this segment and starting the new segment and really we're only going to be covering just a handful of lines but these lines need to be dissected reviewed and certainly appreciated for what they are the ran says now that we have awakened you to awareness of this matter this matter he's referring to the significance of Shabbat and intimacy on Shabbat now that you're aware of it now that you're awakened by this uh the the uh awesomeness of this act during Shabbat we shall return to what we intended to clarify we shall say that the time of the intimate Union is divided into three phases the first phase is the Time of the Season in the term of days this is what we just discussed in regards to shabbat the second is a time of Union in terms of food yes food has a significant impact on intimacy and what comes out of it and the third part is the time of Union in terms of the hours the first part was already explained in this chapter so now we are in essence he's giving us again that caption about these the breakdown of each and every single aspect of the intimate act between a man and his wife and he's letting us know that something that perhaps we didn't think of that food food actually has a significant impact on your intimacy now if you notice the way that we're studying this book is very different than the way people read books usually when people read books uh they many times either skim through it or even if they are reading it they're reading it but not necessarily always studying it unless something jumps out of the page for them and to the point where it's a uh uh you know thought-provoking and lifechanging and generally speaking the way that people study the books is they or they learn the books they read them is they you know they just look at them superficially many times they will forget most of what they read uh with the exception of a few points one of those points is usually the name so they could tell somebody they read such and such book but the way that we're actually reading this book is very different as you've noticed like we've done our other serieses is that we're actually studying the book a very very different way of doing it where we're literally looking at every single line and dissecting it now this may seem uncommon to people that uh have read other works uh you know by by the ramban you know people that have uh uh read and heard about what's called thean the letter that the ramban wrote to his uh son there is a Gula that the ramban uh mentions at the uh uh at the end of that letter to his son which is that you know if you read this letter uh each day you know uh your prayers will come true and many people simply assumed that he's not only talking to his son he's also talking to you so if you read thean every single day your blessings will be uh answered and again this may very well uh be true but at the same token you have to realize if you watch the series ofan that we made a few years ago is that it's not just about reading the uh the letter but also following what it says but more so than anything else if you talk to Torah Scholars then uh you'll find that uh any time that they learn gar and they're at a level where they're reading different different commentators it's very often people ask what does the ramban say about this and not only what does he say about this particular line in thear but how does he say it where his words are read analyzed with a microscope so much so that even the way that he spells the words is analyed by certain similar to how they study other like the r where the language of the sages of the about 800 years ago is not just language where you can learn the wisdom but even the way that they spoke and how they spoke is analyzed but many times people believe that this is how you study their commentary on the tanak on the on the gar but when you read some of their letters their mus writings many times people read it superficially almost like they read other books and that's a mistake because as Rim uh has has taught me this hand wrote this commentary and also this letter meaning the very same ramban that you are dissecting and analyzing every single letter to the T in his commentary on the Kash or in the gar that very same hand of the ramban wrote this this letter and especially the fact that he called this particular letteres nonetheless the letter of Holiness so anyone that has uh uh read in the Torah or has watched our different lectures about that par knows that Kim to be holy is one of the obligations that hasem has on the Jewish people you be holy because I am Holy and you will never find uh Holiness in a place of immorality but in fact you will always find Holiness in a place where there are preservation where there are in essence fences in order to restrict how people Express themselves physically so thises that talks about the highest level of intimacy is one that needs to be analyzed with with a microscope practically in order to understand the beauty of the language of the ramban why he said what he said when he said it and and and really how he said it and here we see that the ran is telling us that food food is something that is an entire phase in the uh Act of Union a part that a person has to review just like the first and the third phase where anytime a person aspires to attain this Holiness they have to first and foremost review themselves review their act don't review your husband or your wife or your neighbor or your neighborhood because that's obviously not your job your job is not to analyze your entire community and say that they're all Wicked or they're all righteous that's not going to do anything for you many times people send me messages complaining about their Community complaining about their Rabbi complaining about the isot but rarely do they ever complain about themselves rarely do they ever say I'm not doing enough I need to do more and this is my plan it's very easy to complain about others in reality is that the first line of rebuke should be to the person you see when you look in the mirror now the ramban is telling us that this act of intimacy this holy Union has three phases one being the specific season meaning the shabat but the second part being the Union uh in in terms of food so a person has to now look at how food affects them how food affects them and we saw from theak in page 82 how Ezra inacted 10 takote one of them was a Tak to uh have eat cooked onion on Friday night because it increases the the quantity of the Zer of the seed so we see that the teachings about the seed of a man the acts of intimacy but specifically the seed everything around it before during after all of the is enormous there's a endless amount of teachings about this part of the body you know whether it's starting the Torah where you're reading about what happened between uh uh um Adam in how he knew his wife or it's a generation of Noah that wasted seed and thereby lost their right to live and hasm annihilated the entire generation with the exception of Noah and his family or it's abah ainu and having that special Covenant that is as relevant today as it was back then which is the Brit cutting the foreskin we see that Hashem is very particular about how we treat our bit and needless to say how we treat the seed that comes out of that bit now the ramban is telling us that food has a enormous impact on that very seed and from there one of the first things that a person uh can uh really uh realize is how much effort how much toil how much significance is put into the study of the seed of the of the of the seed of the man where you have literally volumes and volumes of Torah discussing the different aspects of seed wasted preserved uh you know ones that are damaged deformed and so on and you see from here that the sages spared no ink when it came to the the power of the seed because if a person thinks about it that seed was given the power to not only determine whether there's going to be a child or not but rather that seed is going to determine the fortune of generations now what is this like years ago there was one of the great sages of the generation of all generations named the now Shalom toiled over the T day and night but did not waste a minute when there was an opportunity to do kiru and to help people do chuba and to get closer to Hashem he exerted every single effort even at the age of 100 years old now although some uh bios will tell you that he passed away at the age of 94 years old it's well known that the hid 10 years of his life as a defense against and really died at the age of 104 years old but regardless of that theet still at a very very old age told his students to please take him from house to house so he can inspire people to do Chua so you can inspire people to abandon their sins when one of the students asked the rav why why why do you try so hard okay we know you love the Torah you learned Torah but you've already done a lot you brought you brought the Mish you brought the you you've brought light to the world you've brought the you've brought so much to the world the students of the were the so I mean you did enough why you're already older why not just you know focus on learning tah relaxing but why now at this age do you need to exert your last bit of energy knocking door too and trying to convince different families to do chuva why answered with all seriousness as if he was living what he was saying he said years ago there was a young boy that was uh didn't grow up with a father only grew up with his mother and uh since she was raising him by herself this uh woman could not really afford to uh pay for the Yeshiva education and uh she was not getting any help from the community and was forced to take her son out of the ISA once that boy left the ISA and went to the traditional Public Schools he started becoming influenced by different people from that part of the world from that part of society and little by little this very uh ambitious kid grew his own opinion his own mindset his own philosophy into becoming something that destroyed millions of lives and is still destroying lives until this day his name was Leon trotski Leon trotski could have been saved he said if somebody would have knocked on his mother's door and convinced her to bring our boy back to Yeshiva found a solution for her to bring that boy back to Yeshiva but because nobody did millions of people Jews and Gentiles included were murdered in Cold Blood from the communism that he brought into the world or brought it into a higher level than it already was so the is telling us that that particular seed that came from the father of trotski didn't just impact troski but it impacted the life of the it impacted the lives of millions and millions of people that lost their lives due to trotsky's evil acts impacted millions and millions of lives of people that perhaps didn't die physically but died spiritually due to the teachings and leaderships of trki and impacted millions and millions of lives until this day of people that have similar mentalities Ambitions and thereby use the teachings of trotzki and the philosophy of trotski until this day that one Single Seed impacted an endless amount of people and if we simply understood that our seed can have no less of an impact if not more of an impact into the world certainly we would not want to waste it certainly we would appreciate it much more than we do and in fact we put a lot more thought into it in order to make sure that we're using it the way it's supposed to but many times people jump to a conclusion too early this is too much this is too extreme or they start mocking things because they think that they're already religious enough and anytime a person takes hashem's words takes the Sage's words and discounts them they could be sure that disaster is sure to follow now if you notice some of the lives of the great sages from previous generations you'll see that this is one thing they never did they never discounted anything everything was given the precise amount of attention that it needed even though it looked strange to some people that watched it at least at the time one of the great stories that I read with my uh children is about vosner and how this Torah giant paid attention to the most microscopic details that the average person even if he learned T wouldn't even think of where one time there was a woman came to the uh bet midash where was or came to his house where he was studying with hisim and she as soon as she saw the gabai she was frantic she said I have to speak to the r immediately of course you know when the woman comes and it sounds like this religious woman covers her hair you know very uh serious demeanor you go to R and asked him and the Rob said sure let her in and this woman came toel and told him I just want to tell you that I'm very careful with my P dishes versus the rest of the year so much so that I have two different cabinets one cabinet is for my PES dishes pots and pans all the things that relevant to PES and one cabinet is for the rest of the year and in fact just to make sure that there's no errors each cabinet is locked with a key now although both keys are exactly the same I never forget which key is which and mistake one key for the other but something awful happened for this morning something terrible happened one of my children was playing around in the kitchen and found the key and used the PES key to open the cabinets of the non kosher dishes and the regular key to open the cabinets of the PES dishes does that mean that all of my dishes are not Kosher for PES I have to get new ones now theim that were there they found this you know this question so silly they couldn't help but smile like how would you opening a closet make the dishes not Kosher needless to say not Kosher for p nothing happened you just open a cabinet with the key like but then they're shocked to see that the r one of the take this question as seriously as life and death and says to the lady that's a very big shame I have to check and he starts grabbing different books and he opens the books goes through the pages reads a few lines nods then gets another book reads a few lines nods and after several minutes of doing this he looks up at the woman and says I've confirmed that all of your dishes are perfectly fine for PES and for the rest of the year nothing has changed you're okay the woman is relieved happy and she quickly leaves now of course as soon as she leaves the students ask the RV what just happened here why did you what did you even look at in the books and why did you spend so much effort to answer this question that's really a non question and taught these students something that all of us need to learn from and he says to them this woman clearly has real she really has fear of heaven and a high level of it so much so that she doesn't know when this stringency is a real stringency or something that was made up but if I discredited her if I frowned upon it if I laughed at it then she would be so discouraged that who knows what real stringencies she would start mocking and abandoning and therefore I had to take that stringency as seriously as a real stringency and make sure that she knows everything is okay from there we see how careful the sages were in communicating about even things that to the average person doesn't make any sense and if a person watches any of these lectures or reads any type of Torah and discounts it thinks of it as this is not a big deal this is impossible all types of empty speech they could be sure that the road ahead is not going to be a smooth road because you've taken the Tor One Step lower now the is telling us here that here we have an enormous amount of energy and effort invested into the study of the seed one of the books of Philosophy by one of the sages of a few hundred years ago a seph called seph malel this was written by malel who was also quoted by The kados Who Lived about 400 years ago in this seph mentions the intelligent soul and how it has the power to create other Souls and he says that this this seed is not something that just comes from nowhere rather this is actually comes from this special part of the Soul this intelligent Soul where the seed and a desire an unlimited power and was instilled into this Seed where the souls of the future will be determined so this special part of the soul that rests in the brain is a segment of that not only produces the spiritual aspects but also the physical aspects of the seed the there a certain part of the brain that's involved in production of seed but even more than that here the the seph is telling us that the desire and also the outcome of what could come out of this is all coming from that special part of the Soul now the in in page 4A is discussing the whole issue of a wayward woman a woman that is suspected of cheating on her husband this is something that comes from the in a a woman that a uh secludes herself with a uh a man that's not her husband and after being warned by her husband not to do this again she does it again anyway and thereby earning the suspicion of her husband that she may have actually cheated on him and committed adultery and in those days when the sonad was the uh the power the uh the legal power of the Jewish people if some if someone was uh convicted of uh committing adultery they get a death penalty both them and their co-conspirator but how do you confirm such a thing without cameras or anything like that after the woman was warned by her husband not to seclude herself with another man and she does it anyway and there are two witnesses to her seclusion the husband then takes her to the K in the BET mikdash and once they get to the bet mikdash the Coen tries to convince this woman to admit that she committed adultery because he doesn't want her to deny it when she really did it and then end up drinking the bitter Waters which will kill her so the process of trying to convince her is one of the things that is mentioned in the entire tractate of sa where talks to her tries to pressure her tries to tire her out by making her walk around the bet mikdash it's an entire process very embarrassing process but if she denies it throughout the whole process eventually she drinks the uh the Water a water that was not just any water a water that is a whole holy water that they also put a the name of hasem that was written on a CL and then the uh dipped into the water where the ink along with a specific verse dipped into the water where the ink went into the water then she drinks this water and if she's guilty on the spot she blows up and dies but if she's innocent then she gets a blessing from the for whatever she wants if she didn't have children until now because she's not able to do it she will now have as many children as she wants in so many words if her children are beautiful any child she has from now on will become if her children are ugly any child she has now will become beautiful if they have money issues they won't have money issues like literally they get miraculous blessings but if she's guilty she dies this by the way is a side note is why went to the BET mikdash and was crying hysterical when alah thought she was drunk when she was nodding and moving our lips but not saying anything and he thought that she was drunk he didn't realize that she was praying and Kan went there because she told hm that if you don't uh give me a blessing you don't give me a son I'm going to put myself in a situation where it's going to look like I'm a it's going to look like I'm a wayward woman that cheated on my husband which will force my husband to take me to the K and after the fails at convincing me to admit something I didn't even do and he gets me to drink the waters then I'll get the blessing and the blessing then I'll have a son anyway so in so many words she's like arguing with hasem if you will but to have a blessing to have a son that she's dedicating to hasem but this is why she went to the BET mdash anyway the Wayward woman is put into this process if she drinks and she's guilty she dies on the spot there was actually a story that mentioned that one uh woman had a twin sister they thought they could beat the system they thought that perhaps it's the water that kills not God that kills so they switched since to identical twins even the husband couldn't tell the difference between the two of them and the sister who wasn't married to the husband who didn't cheat went and drank the water and nothing happened so she thought oh I saved my sister even though my sister is a zon and she cheated on her husband still I saved my sister my sister's more important to me than her husband is but when she came back to her house she found her sister blew up into pieces in her house it's not the water that kills it's not the snake that kills it's God that kills it's sin that kills now this whole process of the S is analyzed by the sages to the smallest and most minute details and the page 4 a asks a question it's relevant to us where it says how long is the duration of seclusion meaning how long must a woman be secluded with a man that's not a husband in order to be rendered a in order for heart to say okay this is it you crossed the line now you have to go to the how long and then the sages the different T go into the details and I say well in so many words the time is the time that it takes for tum for defilement to occur which is the time that it takes same type of time that it takes for the actual act for cohabitation to take place which means that it takes for the beginning of cohabitation and how much time is this the amount of time that it takes to Circle a palm tree you know those days they um uh they would uh Circle the palm tree put a rope around it for different reasons so they figured that the amount of time that it takes to put a rope around a palm tree that's how long the time of uh the beginning of uh of intimacy should take place now this is not the entire act meaning it's the the one of the the says that this does not include the uh uh the sedu seducement of the woman it doesn't include removing all the clothes doesn't include all that stuff it's just in essence the beginning of cohabitation the beginning of intimacy and they start going into the details that different sages say how much time it takes the initial uh opinion is that it takes as long as it takes a circle of tree a palm tree rabar says it takes the same amount of time as it does to mix a cup where in the um in those days they had the the wine was uh was very thick and had to be diluted so the process with water so the process of diluting the wine you know took a few seconds so he says that as long as it takes to dilute a cup of wine that's how long it takes to uh the beginning of cohabitation is Rua says the amount of time that it takes to drink that cup which is a specific quantity called benai says it's the amount of time that it takes to roast an egg AKA says it's the amount of time it takes to swallow the egg says the time that it takes to swallow three eggs successfully successively says the time that it takes to a weaver to tie a string you know in those days their uh their beds weren't like today with mattresses and and and comforters and stuff like that the way that they would make beds is they would tie a uh rope specific way and that would become their bed so the reason why he specifically mentions a weaver is because a weaver ties the bed much faster uh in essence trying to tell you that this doesn't take very long but it's a specific amount of time says the time that it takes a woman to extend her hand into her mouth and remove a splinter that was stuck between our teeth those days instead of uh the uh toothpicks they would use splinters to remove stuff from their uh uh from their mouth Heth and uh the reason why he mentions the time it takes a woman to do that is because a woman was a lot more particular about it than quicker to do it again emphasizing that it's not much time seconds few minutes but not very much time that's in essence the common opinion among all the sages here but they each use a different example if I along with it's to eat a egg cook an egg eat three eggs TI you know all these strange things that again probably sound foreign to to you as well and PLO says the time it takes a woman to extend her hand into a basket and remove a loaf of bread and even though there's no solid Biblical proof for this particular one there's an illusion to it in the verse in Proverbs 6: 26 where says because on the account of a harlot Zona to the extent of a loaf of bread so from there we learn a couple of things before we go further just to understand we see that all of these other proofs are the calculations of those particular sages as the in 4B says where did they get all these numbers where do they get all these calculations each one of them has the understanding based on their own act with their own wives how long is that first stage that first beginning stage of cohabitation how long it takes R AKA says that R says this everyone from their own particular experience there's a question that's brought up or how does a um uh um one of the sages that uh was student of RAB AKA Ben aai was his name how does he even give an opinion he wasn't married he wasn't married so how how does he even know this so thear answers it's also in in 4B says no either if you're of the opinion like the says at a different tractate in page 63a that he actually was married for a short period of time to R aa's daughter and then he left her and he stayed unmarried and didn't want to get married in the first place because he was addicted to the Torah and he knew he would not be a good a good husband we said that what else can I do my soul craves the toah and the world can be preserved by other people so benazzi was a specially unique person where thear says don't ever try to repeat what he did he literally spent every waking hour learning to to the point where he couldn't even be a husband so where did he learn it from so some say no he was married so from that short period of time that he was married toa's daughter that's where he learned the calculation and some say if even if he wasn't married then he was he had such a high level of fear of Heaven that hem says in the secrets of hem are revealed to those that fear Him this is in Psalm 25:14 so in so many words he got it from God God gave him a special deal here you go here's some secrets so each one of the sages Ed their own experience to learn this but then we have one Sage says well even as though this is not in a uh there's no biblical proof to it there is a uh verse that says something that testifies to it in Proverbs so one of the other things that we learned from here in regards to the Holiness of the sages is that if it was not listed in the Torah shown clearly in the Torah in order you know the only other way for it to be something is if they actually had personal experience with it but if it doesn't exist in the toah and they don't have any proof from their own personal lives it simply doesn't exist now of course everything is in a toah but many times you'll see the sages also mention specific personal experience with certain things now the uh asks why do I need all these different times why don't just tell me the first opinion which is to do time it takes to wrap a uh uh the Rope around the tree why do I need the egg the three eggs The Cook the egg eat the egg the loaf of bread what do I need all of this for and the says if it was taught to you where just uh you know one opinion you'd have a misunderstanding what's the misunderstanding all of them were necessary because when you ask how long does it take for the defilement to occur if I would have just given you that one opinion would have assumed that I'm also including the time it takes to become defiled and her seduction but no these are two separate things and further if I would have have mentioned only one of them you would have thought that this also includes the actual act itself to be completed and it doesn't so from here we learned that you know the gives multiple examples of this specific thing how long it takes why do we go over this why do we care because from there we learn at least how careful the sages were were with their language and what you what uh usage of words they have two how nothing comes out of thin air there's no I think there's either personal example something that you've seen with your own eyes or toah otherwise it simply doesn't exist but the third thing is how much effort was invested into every single aspect of unity between a man and a woman whether it was a man and his wife or an adulterous relationship or but literally every aspect was analyzed to the point of how much time each step is supposed to take what can you compare it to how can you understand it is it just your own unique experience or is it general knowledge but even more than anything else the says it's not that there were seven different experiences and therefore you got seven different examples no no is that there is seven different types of connections between a man and a woman of how they unite what causes them to become aroused seven different types of things that cause arousal and therefore you got seven different types of examples this type of arousal takes as long as you know to cook an egg that type of arousal takes to eat uh uh three eggs that type one egg that type bread meaning that it's not just random things oh I like eggs I like bread I like ropes no no every single thing is representing something else so why not just say that because that's not how the speak just like Hashem himself doesn't speak in such a clear fashion when it comes to this particular issue so much so that Hashem himself uses euphemisms to represent different body parts or different acts for example in the uh part of the Tor where AEM says promiscuity is forbidden for a man and a woman Hashem says a euphemism an opposite where he says AES or kados is not allowed if you translate it literally means a holy woman a kados means a holy man you have an entire par in Tora multiple others that tell us that the obligation of is to be holy but here it says we're not allowed to be holy so obviously the SES say yeah but look at what's said before it look at what's said after it it's all talking about immorality so this is you know the type of immorality which is something that's a on a regular basis promiscuity people having girlfriends boyfriends and things of that nature that's for but hasem uses that particular language because the holy language is exactly what it is it's a holy language there isn't even a word in the Holy language for the male member it's not like English where there's 50 different words for the male member that some people made up some comes from Latin no no there is no word in the Holy language for the male member they called but they also called the female uh uh uh part but what is mean means nakedness so from there the sages learned that since hasem himself uses clean language which you'll get the meaning of you'll understand it so therefore it's not necessary to use these this words they themselves also don't use these words when it's not necessary now even when talking about it the sages are very careful even though it is a very common topic and and one of the reasons why it's not recommended uh and really frowned upon for women especially in our generation to learn gar is because these particular issues are mentioned almost in every tractate in the gar at some point or another and it's not healthy for a woman spiritually to look into this type of stuff on a regular basis especially when it's not pertaining to her life and her body but the point is that we see here that the sages used a a specific holy language that told us how every single aspect of unity whether it's the Forbidden way or in a a way that's holy how each and every step was analyzed why why do we need to analyze every single part why do we need to put so much effort so much Torah study time into understanding the magnitude of this act the sages showed us their Holiness where they want us to know that just like in the world of genetics the science of genetics where they'll take a certain animal let's call it a bull and they want this bull because it has good jeans it's strong it's fast it has good meat whatever it is they want this bull to reproduce now that that bull is going to reproduce a certain amount of time but not all of its seed will produce the same thing so the geneticist will analyze the different parts of that bull and take the best parts that they want and try to reproduce them in a different cow so much so that if they found a specific Bull with a certain type of meat that they want with a certain percentage of fat certain versus Muscle uh certain type quality and so on they will literally go into it the smallest most minute details in order to take this and reproduce it in order to make better quality meat and anyone that is familiar somewhat with this type of science knows that the smallest most micros Cosmic details are analyzed in order to ensure that the results are going to be worth the effort because if you have one small dot missing the whole research could be worth millions of dollars goes into garbage years ago again said a story he said that there was a a guy that uh bought himself a plant in Israel and uh he went on the bus and he's happy about his little plant plant is brand new and uh he's happy about this plant why because he's hoping that once he plants this plant it's going to grow after several years and produce his favorite fruit now as he's sitting in the bus the guy next to him looks and NDS he says to them why you nding he says because the fruits are going to be bitter excuse me so the guy says to them your tree the the little plant that you got the fruits they're going to be bitter they're not going to be sweet like you probably want so the guy looks at him goes how how how do you even know the plant didn't even grow it's still little it's still a baby plant why you why being so negative why so negative why you hating my plant so the guy looks at him he goes no no no you're not understanding I'm not hating on a plant I'm telling you a reality that plant will grow into a tree and produce bitter fruits and there's nothing you can do about it so the frustrated Israeli looks at him and says how do you know what kind of fruits are going to come out and how they're going to taste just by looking at my plant are you jealous and the guy laughs and says no no I'm not jealous I'm an agriculturist this is what I've been doing for the last 40 years analyzing different plants and your plant has a specific black mark right near the bottom and every single one of them that we've analyzed that had bitter fruits had exactly that Mark on it and therefore I know the fruits that will come out of that plant are going to be bitter now how could a small little black dot caused so much damage you can ask that question until you blew in the face and unless you want to become an agriculturist or a uh geneticist or a chemist or a biologist you could just simply save yourself the time and simply believe it because it's a reality but you could even ask whoever Cooks in your house if they simply take this little white powder and put a little bit too much or a little bit too little into the next dish that they cook for the household what happens a little bit too much of that salt a little too little of that salt a little too much of that sugar little too little of that sugar and the entire dish changes as if it's a completely different dish now although in food you can change that by adding a little taking off a little watering it down you can't do that with living things like trees fruits and needless to see with humans once it's done it's done there was another guy that was looking for a tree looking for fruits looking for different things to enjoy them and he found the guy that was going to willing to sell him the seeds and he wanted the seeds more than anything else but the guy wanted a huge amount of money for this seed called $40 a seed he said you crazy $40 for one seed he said listen sir this is what it cost it's a good seed you can have endless amount of fruits that you could pretty much reproduce you never have to buy seeds again and the guy just simply couldn't bring himself to do it you want take 20 he says no we're not going to take 20 that's $40 a good price so they don't get to an agreement he leaves the place but as soon as he comes out some Arab walks up to him he says what's wrong with you he said n these guys are crazy they want $40 a seed he said what seed do you want he said I want such and such seed he go I can get a few how much you want to pay says $20 she goes you got it $20 is good great come with me he goes with the Arab few minutes later the Arab gives him some seeds look exactly the same here you go $20 he's as happy as he get he thinks he just got the best deal in the world Waters the seed takes care of it little by little it grows but as it grows he starts seeing this thing grow in deformed ways the opposite of what nature is supposed to do he comes back to the AR goes what did you sell me here what is this thing why does it grow this way goes I don't know listen this the seed but but but this is what you sold me this is garbage and I can't use this said hey there's no refunds she but why does it do it why just at least explain to me goes oh no these seeds they uh you know they have this black dot on them so they tend to do it oh you couldn't tell me that before then you wouldn't buy so the reality is is that this type of information is relevant to every part of life but the most pertinent part of it is in your part of your intimate life because the more a person invests into learning about Kusa Holiness the more they are now going to make themselves capable of attaining Holiness now the in takes us on a different path in in the uh third chapter the fifth here it talks about the part of Shiva when somebody dies then uh one of the uh things that the uh immediate family member needs to do is to overturn the bed today since we have different beds as I explained before before back then their beds were uh rope tied so they would simply overturn the bed uh today you take off the mattress put it on the floor but thear asked why do you even do this what's the significance of overturning the bed what does it have to do with dead people what does it have to do with you know the guy that's alive that's mourning why so thear says from where does the overturning of the beds where does it come from what is this that's the question riisi says in a name of uh raban that this is a uh um one of the things that a person needs to do not to uh sit on the ground but uh towards the ground and bar kapara elaborates that this whole overturning of the bed is after the expression overturn the agent and r R both say in the name of Rim that why does one sleep on an overturned coach so that he would wake up at night and realize that he's a mourner so so far if you haven't learned this is all cryptic language doesn't mean anything to you first they telling you okay so don't sit on the floor fine sit towards the floor so it shows you that okay so this bed is overturned so you're in essence it's not a comfortable you're closer to the floor it's like a very low chair fine just don't sit on the floor okay but then it tells you overturn the agent it's calling the bed an agent why is a bed an agent then lastly says why sleep on this overturned coach why why even do this so he wakes if he wakes up in the middle of the night he realizes that he's a mourner now we're going to go and dissect this to see what it means so the question is why overturn the bed as part of morning simple answer is because the bed is a symbolic agent the says that the bed is an anent of mankind due to the intimacy that takes place on it meaning this bed that's where intimacy takes place so this bed is the agent that mankind is made from this is where it takes place hence the reason why the ACT between a man and his wife in Hebrew in the Holy language is called literally means usage of the bed but it's referring to TM is referring to intimacy again that clean holy language is never going to say like people say the uh other words that are out there in English you ask the average 15year old how long does anything take and what does it do he could tell you a lot more information that he should not even know but here the holy sages use specific words not because they lack knowledge the opposite but rather because they have an understanding of how important it is to use the right words and keep a clean language so this is called as such not only as a euphemism to use the holy language and use cleanliness in the language because a person that defiles their mouth also defiles their breed anytime you see somebody wasting seed you could be sure that this person is also has a foul mouth and the same thing vice versa if they have a foul mouth for sure they waste seed the two go together now the sages are teaching us multiple things the second thing they're teaching Us by using this word is that the the Torah Scholars as we said last week they use the bed but not like the regular people they use the bed specifically for intimacy because their regular sleeping is usually they're sleeping on their books studying throughout the night until they pass out they don't fall asleep in regular beds cuz they're learning all night but when the bed is used for a specific purpose for what for what it's meant for the agent the agent for mankind to produce children to be intimate for theah between a man and his wife second this this this bed is a reminder to even the people that are stringent with the teachings that you're supposed to mourn so long as we don't have a bet mikdash and thereby sleep on the floor don't sleep in a bed it's a reminder to them that not to sleep not to uh do the Tash not to do the intimacy on the floor that it's forbidden to be intimate on the floor that even if somebody sleeps on the floor he still is not allowed to be in intimate on the floor the sages forbid it one of the reasons is because it a the floor is typically cold and that can cool the seed of the man which can produce deformed children so even if somebody's very stringent person and is mourning for the destruction of the BET mikdash and sleeps on the floor thear said overturning the beds is not mean is not referring to sitting on the ground but rather towards the ground where the Tash itself has to be done above the ground has to be done on the bed and the risk of not following that literally is a risk of all of what we said earlier which is the huge potential outcomes of what happens from these children a person could looking forward to having a child their whole life and if they miss on this one particular detail and they simply just lose their mind and decide that they want to not listen to the sages or not even know what the sages saying just be on the floor and then they have a is they have a deformed Child come out of it that's something that they have to live with for many many years if if not their entire life so it's that small bit of information that carries an endless amount of weight now of course I know people are going to try to pretty much hang me over this what do you mean how could this cause this because they're trying to use their little you know rational 223 heads but again when we're talking about t it doesn't make a difference whether it makes sense to you or it doesn't make sense to you it's true regardless now the other part that uh this is teaching us about this bed is that this bed is the agent this bed is the agent for mankind and thereby this bed is supposed to be viewed as a holy tool to bring special souls to the world and not just a place to sleep not just a place to be like an animal but rather this is the agent that Hashem sent me queen size king size single size twin size whatever size good mattress bad mattress fat mattress small doesn't make a difference this is the agit when I see this bed I think about okay this is something that I could use at a certain time during the month in serving Hashem how I can use this to potentially bring a special soul that will bring light to the world light of Torah a special soul that can serve AEM day and night a special soul that can encourage other people to serve AEM needless to say I could also use it to sleep it's not forbidden to sleep there and sleep get energy so I can study better I can serve hasem better there's nothing wrong with that but the key is to understand that this is not just another piece of furniture there just sit there that has special looks that I spent thousands of dollars on no no no we're not a commercial on television telling you that our mattress is the best mattress in the world and their mattress sucks no this is a tool a tool to serve AEM either serving hasem by having the opportunity to rest and thereby be able to serve him even better tomorrow or a tool that I could serve AEM by yearning for him to give me another special soul that could serve him or fulfilling the Mitzvah that a man is obligated to his wife the Mitzvah of even if it doesn't produce a baby even if it cannot produce a baby it's still a Mitzvah in itself that the man is obligated to do and in so many words when a person starts looking at this bed as a tool to serve AEM they start realizing wait a minute am I supposed to also do that with everything else and the answer is yes because the sages tell us that at the end of a person's time and when he goes up to shamay his walls will testify against him the walls of his house will testify against him and let hem know how he used them did he use these things that are between these walls these Furniture these chairs the computer the phone the whatever you have in your house did you use it to serve AEM or did you use it against Hashem because Hashem is the one that gave you that phone Hashem is the one that gave you the computer Hashem is the one that gave you the couch the chair the food the refrigerator did you cook kosher food or non- kosher food did you have guests that were just friends that simply had nothing better to do or there were people that actually needed to be guests did you have peace in your home or did you just show off your home as if you have peace were you like one of those TV shows that shows off how much wealth you have but in reality the only thing you have is money and therefore you makes you the most poorest person on planet Earth how did you serve Hashem with this money that he gave you how did you serve hem with that couch how did you serve Hashem with that chair did you serve Hashem at all and those walls will testify against the person but more than anything else that bed is is not just a test testifying against its owner but that bed is either an agent that was put to work and leaves an entire history in the makings behind or not if a person is more inclined to adultery promiscuity pornography and Netflix that more likely than not that bed only acquired more and more tum no different than the bed of aona which brings us to the next point if a person use this bed as a holy tool to bring special souls to the world now they could understand why we have this Mitzvah of turning the bed because now that this person passed away that means that there's no more souls being created by that person so therefore since the B is the is symbolic of the agent of the reproduction of mankind now that one of the people is no longer in the world and there's no reproduction by them we kick out the agent we kick out the agent for a period of time as symbolic for that person no longer being here not only are there no more souls being produced but the soul was taken away now the worst thing that a person can do is take this stuff lightly mock it think it's ridiculous and that it doesn't impact them all you have to do is look at the current generation and how many mentally deformed children there are in the world either a creation of their parents or their teachers or both you have young kids who do not even know the basic alphabet but yet they decide that they're not a boy even though they were born with all the proper chromosomes to say that they are a boy you have women thinking that the way for them to succeed in life is by simply selling their body as if they're a piece of steak regardless of what age regardless of what person person regardless of where and how promiscuity is running rampant to the point where it's become admired a woman's promiscuity and immorality is highlighted on televisions on movies so much so that it's become the acceptable behavior and if you're not like this you're viewed as prude and frowned upon instead of emulating the Kings and the princes and the queens of yester year at least the looks of them people emulating their servants and their prostitutes people admire such Behavior if you look at all of history you'll see that this is the opposite of how everything has been you have people today that think it's perfectly fine to be multiple people even though they don't have a disorder of bipolar disorder or multiple personality disorder they simply want to behave one way with one person and behave a different way with a different person and behave a completely different way with a different person people have no problem with LGBT becoming something you teach to Children teach in schools they have no problem teaching pornography in schools where after the parents come and cry out to the Board of Education not by cursing or Screaming by simply reading the textbooks reading the books that's being provided to their kids and then they're being silent saying no no okay we get the point what do you mean you get the point you're the one that gave this book you're the one that authorized these books for my 9 10 11 12 yearold child 5-year-old child to read and this book that you're giving them in school is talking about things that you're not even allowed to think needless to say you're not allowed to watch and you shouldn't you're telling them about the acts between a man and a woman a man and a man and all types of other filth why is this part of the curriculum and guess what it's not just the fault of the teachers it's certainly also the fault of the parents because a parent that leaves their kids in such a place is as much at fault as the teachers are but we have an entire generation full of this we have a generation of children that decide that as soon as they're frustrated they're allowed to kill people and shoot up people in the mall and schools and stores never in history has such a thing happened where somebody's frustrated for whatever reason or another and they decide to take a bunch of guns they could buy at a local Walmart store and just shoot up about a bunch of people for no reason whatsoever other than the fact that they watched in a video game or their friend dared them to do it or there's some type of built-in hate that's based on nothing no other time in history has such a thing happened no one in history went out there and said you know what I hate everyone and just walked into the park walked into the market with a sword and just started killing everybody it just never happened you're not going to find stories like this in any of the books including the mythical Tales but in this generation it's once a week you have here in America school shootings now although racism and and all types of other vile crimes are as old as time the type of crime the type of mentality that's in schools that's in regular highlevel you know uh Society neighborhoods is the same as the ones that you have in the lowlevel society in the lowlevel uh housing and so on meaning there is no difference between the vile things that are happening to the rich as there are to the poor in past Generations there was a significant class difference where yes money has always been different there was poor there was rich but the problems usually were different too while one was starving the other one was overeating today it's very different today the problems are the same it seems like there's as much murder in Washington DC and in politics and in media and in Hollywood as there is in the projects and and literally in gangster neighborhoods it seems like the world is upside down and no one is calling foul enough to say you know what we have to change everyone wants a specific person to change a specific position to change but the reality is that this has nothing to do with politics politics won't change it even if you bring the best politicians that man can find it won't change anything the crime that's happening in Isel the government is targeting its own citizens while people complain about Israel being against the Arabs anyone that lives in Israel anyone that's actually familiar with what's happening in Israel would quickly realize that the government hates hat the Jews that are religious much more than it hates the Arabs and in fact even the seculars they hate but they love the Arabs the very same Arabs that ran over a few people and killed them last week and killed a bunch of more a few days before that and killed a bunch of more a few days before that and commits terrorism on a regular basis that very same person that very same Nation if you want to call it the government favors them one of the ways that we see it is the outcome of terrorism the outcome of terrorism in isra is one of the most embarrassing things that ever happened to Israel as a nation where the police shows up to the place where the Arab ran over two children an adult killed a few people he's trying to keep going back and forth running over more people careless about the fact that there are four policemen with guns drawn right next to him he keeps going and and no one shoots him why all four policemen are scared to shoot because they know that if they shoot him and this is not precisely according to the judges communist judges that they have there in Israel if they don't determine that this was real the risk was already over they would con they would actually try the police officer for murder and it put the police officer in jail for the rest of his life like they did that Soldier and like they do others that are actually trying to defend the people so you ask how did the terrorist eventually die a civilian killed him with ackq now in other places where you saw a different Arab stabbing a bunch of people shooting a bunch of people just in the last couple of weeks there were policemen there didn't do anything they were scared to shoot them but if you remember the endless amount of videos that we got of how the very same police nearly killed a bunch of religious Jews for not wearing a mask so if you kill people as an Arab we're scared to shoot you but if you're a religious Jew not wearing a mask we have no problem in killing you now if you're going to tell me this is a government problem you're mistaken if you're going to tell me this is a Arab Israeli problem you are mistaken if you're going to tell me this is a society problem you're also mistaken this problem is 100% spiritual when you have people incline themselves to be more like the animals than they are the man that they were created to be that Original Seed has so much filth in it that what do you expect it to produce when people are more promiscuous by the time they're teenagers then literally entire families were with their own wives in previous generations what do you expect to come out when people frown upon teachings of Holiness even if they themselves claim to be religious but yet they ask you why do you always talk about this as if this is like a new found issue as if literally every other page in thear every other page in all over the T doesn't talk about this in some aspect or another as if Holiness is some new issue unique to this generation the reality is is that if a person doesn't take this stuff to Heart then they'll frown upon teachings that are very fundamental to correcting the problem that we have in the world and that's why you see things that may seem like not a big deal in reality happen in every other home for example this very same bed that's supposed to be holy that's supposed to be a vessel for you to serve your creator for you to potentially produce a special soul for you to potentially fulfill your marriage obligations for you to potentially get the rest that's necessary to serve hasem even better instead of looking at it that way you look at the bed as a canvas a canvas for all types of crimes not just the obvious crimes of adultery promiscuity wasting seed and the like but even crimes that you do while you're married such as buying bed sheets with some soccer player or football player's image on it now some of you are probably laughing wait there's something wrong with that yes you put another man a picture of another man on your bed why would you think that's a good idea that your wife has the image of some other men on the on the bed or opposite another woman as a bed sheet why would you think that it's good for your husband to have another woman in there or the worst shet it's not on the bed it's on the walls people put pictures of all types of celebrities on the walls of their bedroom all types of animals on the walls of their bedroom why would you think that's a good thing the mid says that at the time OFA one king nearly killed the queen because their baby turned out much darker than they are and he was sure that his wife committed adultery AKA was asked to come before the king officially kills the queen and of course R aka the teacher of am quickly understood the problem and he said to the king your highness do you have pictures sculptures in your bedroom and he says sure I do says do they happen to be dark he says yes but why the difference it make what kind well I got these special statues that uh we received as a gift from a friend of mine who's the king in Africa says oh so you have no fault your wife is not at fault your highness your wife has eyes and while she was together with you those eyes looked at what you have in the room and what our eyes saw affected what came out of her body and thereby you have a darker kid she didn't cheat on you now the average person today would think this is ridiculous until they do enough research and realize that this is very much real when a person puts all types of characters especially impure people on their bed around their bed all they're doing is magnifying the impurity in their life even more so when a person treats their bed as if it's public property they let anybody they you know that wants to sleep there sleep there it's a mistake even generosity in hosting guests has its limits if you have a hundred rooms in your house and you want to allow everybody to go into the rooms and and feel free you have to make one exception no one is allowed in the parents' bedroom not to sleep there and quite frankly not even to go visit and see what's in there I know that it's common for people to show their house especially if they have a nice house or they have new guests and they show people the bedrooms and they show people the living room and they show people the showers and they show people the elevator I know I used to do it myself too you live in a $5 million house you want to show people stuff I remember don't show people your bedroom don't show them the bedroom don't let them sleep in the bedroom why this is like KES in the bet mdash not everyone's allowed it now if you have little kids that's not a problem they could sleep in their beds if you want it's not a problem but I'm talking about other adults there's no reason for any of them to ever be in your bedroom needless to say to ever sleep there now some people that are very holy are even sensitive to what happened in the room so much so that they many times refuse to sleep in hotel rooms because even though they changed the bed sheets in the hotel rooms or at least they say they do if enough filth happened in that bedroom which if it's a hotel today certainly filth happened there and a lot of it then that filth is still there that spiritual filth is still there and some holy people can sense it and it can affect them now why do I tell you all of this because each and every single one of these things is not just something that could affect your life in the long run but rather it's things that could affect you in the short run in ways that you won't feel right away because these are the type of things that can damage the seed sometimes damaging it to the point where the seed dies and you can't have kids sometimes putting a small tiny defect on that seed instead of you having a precious holy Kid come out that respects the parents that loves the parents you have some little troll terrorizing the parents for absolutely no reason and nothing ever good ever coming out of them these small little details are what the holy people were concerned about now of course if you're worried about the small details there are other things that can help you accustom yourself to accepting these small details such as your regular Behavior outside of the bedroom one of the things that's very important in Judaism is how a person protects their eyes their eyes are their windows to the soul what you see whether a man or a woman is what's going to impact your Nish what impacts your Nish is what's going to impact what comes out of it what seed comes out of you what egg what you produce if a man looks at everything and anything you could be sure nothing good will come out of that person only sins the P 61a says that it's prohibited for a man to walk behind a woman it's called because when a man walks behind a woman close enough where you can see her body move it creates all types of inappropriate thoughts so much so thatan said that it's better for you to walk behind a lion than a woman so much so that the says that a person that accustoms thems to constantly walk around behind women constantly surround themselves with all types of immodest woman has no share of the world to come page 22A says a person that's a doesn't have t doesn't read Torah doesn't study Torah doesn't study mishna the Torah says about him I shall sow the house of Israel and the house of yudah the seed of man and the seed of an animal the animal is referring to him if you don't have Tora you'll be referred to in shim as a animal why an animal because you'll see that the things that are in front of you as tools of arouser rather than creations of your creator people that can produce Holiness chapter 21 number one that a man is prohibited from walking behind a woman even if she's completely dressed in a modest way needless to say if she's not modest how much space does he have to have between him and a woman it should be at least four amote which is about 8 ft some say it should be more 21 number two says that there are some scheme that say that since today it's common place for there many women to be in the streets and a person has to function the only way to function is by simply having your head down at all times and only seeing within the four amot around you short distance in front of you short distance uh on the left right that's it that's the only way for you to protect these windows to your soul to make sure that the seed that comes out of you the egg that comes out of you whatever comes out of you is going to be good now if a person is in line and he has to stand behind a woman and there's no other choice then he should step back a little bit and turn to the side and look down the whole time look sideways don't stare at the woman behind in front of you needless to say don't chitchat become friends why all of those things will lead you to inappropriate thoughts Judaism does not believe in platonic relationships we called Atomic relationships not platonic those relationships those friends between man and woman only lead to problems you want to be friends be friends with your wife be friends with your husband not somebody else's wife or somebody else's husband now sitting behind a woman is allowed especially if you can't see her cuz she has a high chair but if you can see her and especially if she's immodest then it's forbidden unless you can simply look position yourself in a way that doesn't see her but if this is going to be on a regular basis you work in one of these offices doesn't have cubicles you can't see any you could see everything if you're going to be positioned next to an emodist on a woman on a regular basis either change seat or change jobs or just prepare yourself for Gom whichever one you want now woman also has responsibility if you're walking and you see that there is men right behind you move to the side let them pass you one of the places we see this in the tah itself is in the story in Genesis 24: 61 where it says that and when elzar and RKA were coming back home through have Rifka marry it says that RKA and our female servants got up and went behind the man elel 61a says it's not a coincidence that they went behind El it's teaching us they had to go behind Eleazar because it's prohibited for him to go behind them from there we learn that these rules are not just something that was made up today just to torture the generation these rules are already inside of to from 3,334 years ago and if you could apply them in your day-to-day life you could certainly apply them in those places of Holiness called the bedrooms take this to heart because surely it will benefit you and this will be the strength you need the reminder you need to do exactly just that and you are happy to let us know the good news when those precious fruits come to life and you're there to celebrate it thank you very much for learning with me maym bless each and every single one of you if you want to support donate volunteer for organization anything that you could do to help us please go to the websites be.org or BH torah.org andm we'd be happy to hear from you call to we'll learn again tomorrow [Music]