Shabbos Mitzvos In A Hospital - Rabbi Yakov Zev Smith

like to welcome everyone to from on shabas MIT in a hospital the great sponsoring sheti at email.com har Smith recently heard a shil where someone's wife was in the hospital she had a baby a good good Sim but the question was she was in Manhattan until he gets there could be an hour and a half 2 hours after man and what should she do she make her own could she eat before then we had a really interesting sh with someone knew of in the hospital M he was he was had no family and he couldn't make KES but he wanted to make K be a big but the problem is he the logistics he couldn't make Kish on shabas for him could he make KES for the like a half hour before the and then he'll drive home and'll be home for daving and for the suit at home can you be someone in kides if you it's not yet chabas you like the was we had a sh with someone only had one it was not M what do you do about so as you notice we have a interesting sug today where people are in the hospital or rehabilitation center and there are three groups of Mitzvah that a person has to do the Mitzvah of Kes sud shab and and the sh for the and sometimes for the visitor but the truth is we're going to this is also a good review of for healthy people so sit back and enjoy as we'll see it's a beautiful sugya but one point we have to be mag that this is very much an allinclusive sug because as we know there's no difference men and women regarding KES and there is a difference and even will see perhaps they're also but the point is that Sayes and they have the identical of Kish like men so really it's the G to patience both men and women now let's get a more practical regarding Hava there is a a version women are very scared to make their own abdah drink the wine forget it but regarding KES there's absolutely no shil whatsoever could make her own Kish and drink the wine or grape juice there's no sh now of course in a regular situation the the woman is with her husband but an is that has to make kiddish in a hospital whatever there's no Shiloh whatsoever she could make the regular KES and drink the wine more so a daughter or any woman for that matter can make kid for a woman in the hospital because regarding kidish women and men are absolutely equal if it's n let me just very briefly outline the making of Kes now of course at home we try to do every mitvah of course also in the most way we have a beautiful silver and the best wine but in a situation in a hospital we'll do the best we could do so let me make the minimum and whatever whe it's NE to it's very simple you don't need a silver be in the hospital any glass or rubber we'll soon see even disposable actually is good but you don't need the fancy be all you need is a cup that holds a rious of wine now it's hard to say exactly but a rious anywhere between three and 5 oun a try to get a glass or rub a cup but if that's not we even a disposable cup whether it's a plastic cup or a foam cup even a paper cup as long as it holds a rious of wine I don't think there's a cup in this world that is does not hold rious of wine except for a schnaps cup but if you hold Ras is 3 o 4 oz there's no cup that's less than that so basically try to if you know before shabas you're going to make Kish the hospital take a longer Unbreakable plastic cup better beat a cup that's not you know disposable but even disposable is good the only issue that there is is someone could have a little bit grape juice in a small bottle and he got a big cup and he fills it it's not to the top so we try to have a but don't forget a is not so fill up the put the put the grape juice in the cup and make kidish like that now someone said what's wrong if I add water so at least the cup CH is full there's a problem because grape juice Alm holds when you eat water it might lose it sh grape juice because grape juice not like wine that could absorb water so better don't fill the cup and make sure that the grape juice is a gin and KES now if you want to be a real Lon what you could do is get get ice and put the ice into the grape juice see ice fills up the K but doesn't yet dissolve so it won't really disturb the the of the grape juice but that's not at all basically it's not so hot to find a cup and grape juice and make KES how much do you have to drink like women are not big drinkers of wine or grape juice so LMA between 1 and a half and 2 O is fine how much is one and a half or 2 ounces very simple a schnaps cup typically is an ounce so two schnaps cups is all you need I hope it's clear it's not so hard in the hospital to make and of course if you know you're going to be in the hospital person be in the hospital on chabas so prepare before chabas a bottle of grape juice with a appropriate K and there that's fine now questions that come up which we're not so familiar with let's say the can't eat or drink hopefully it's a temporary situation they have to before a testing or after surgery or or right before child birth they can't eat or drink SOA the question is is there an on a for a person that's not going to eat a drink to make KES is there to hear Kish from someone else so the EM is the an integral part of Kes KES has to be says the fish giml giml if you person made Kish and didn't eat he wasn't the Kish so typically KES has to be now we are even cake is good enough you know it's not perfect you know someone once asked me he thought that if he makes Kish and eats cake he's it's not true is like a you don't become a if you get but you're not the sud in fact we person could even bees with re of wine but KES has to beim some type of a sud and that's why the Sha in Z says if someone is unable to eat or he doesn't have wine or pass and he can't make KES and he is not so theoretically if someone cannot eat a drink they're not to makees or even hear KES you know what that's like it's like all of us on we don't make just because we can't do better if you can't eat or drink there's no ah you'll say but the is eating I mean he's alive maybe it's a feeding tube maybe it's inen that's not called he's not e it it's not in the stomach it's in the veins so basically a that's not unable to eat or drink ister from KES and doesn't have to bother they kidish from someone else CU it's not really working I did see if someone is eating but can't eat wheat or wine or grape juice but they eat other foods for them it's K to hear Kish from someone else even though they don't have the but that's kada I must add that laa even if someone is put from Kish all is not yet lost because as says the of is not is what say you could say when someone can't make or not he's definitely still and that's again whether it's or say in fact the beginning of says we should all be by having a mind by Ding and the there points out that you have to have a mind don't forget when we DAV we don't necessarily have a mind with but if someone knows he can't makees minimally when you say when you you should have a mind that the same applies to a day KES see I thought that the night KES is is he says even if you can't make it even though it's only a at least say something sometimes has to wait for someone to come to make Kish for them sometimes they're waiting and they're getting hungry so let me be clear m in the end of quoting says that if someone is waiting for KES but they have no KES as of yet and they're weak they're allowed to eat before KES wave the is of eating before KES of a so I believe it's it's certainly a is more of a than if he's waiting for the Kish to come till his anle comes you know his anle is not even so responsible it come now it'll come later so AV let him eat don't forget the most important MIT is so let him just eat before and when the comes he'll be what happens sometimes in a hospital there's no wine or grape in our local hospitals the wonderful doing an incredible Mitzvah but let's say a person's in out of town Hospital there's no wine or grape juice so we here we have an that we think is is is is not relevant but it is and that's making basically to make just let me outline how it's done you know people forget the procedure is the first thing do make you wash that's right M says that in briefly but that's the first thing you wash don't forget the of the a but the of was to wash then make Kish and then make a why because sometimes you'd have to do that when you have no wine okay that's not the meing of most of but when someone has to make he washes cut put your hands on theover the is covering theas before I make a uncover the put both hands on the two kalas make on make a on the kalas are uncovered then recover the kala put your hands on top of the cover and make the of Kes and please don't make a second because you get so used to it how could you eat before AIT don't forget you made AIT earlier and that AI will go on the on now eating as well when no wine grape juice or even Kal is available it's m if you have enough cake that you feel would be suda that you can make a I think you can make a on that you can make a kidish on that as well very often a visitor who's doing a Mitzvah comes to make Kish for a and they have a long walk home so they don't have us such a situation it's Friday night they're making kidish at home for their family but it's a long walk can they make k for the drink a wine maybe have a piece of cake or two and then have a cup of coffee so you can feel go home with a little more energy in other words we know by day we rely on cake as B does that work for night as well so I didn't find anybody says No in fact speaking about the night kid says you could be with cake so B points out that it works for night as well even though we might argue that KES at night is unlike by day so maybe it has to be more but the says that there's no difference night or day I did see but again if this is important for for the to have KES we could be on this that you can be eat either eat either drink AAS of wine or kazas of and the visitor is also comes home again soon he makes his family out the mid of har that can't make Kish so we'll soon see there an of AR we're making for them but again I want to be clear there's nothing wrong whatsoever with a woman making kides and drinking the grape juice myll there's an there's an aversion we'll soon see why buta a woman could make Kish if the is or even a man can't make KES so here we come to an important and that is like the follows if I make Kish just I make Kish for the but I'm with that Kish I eat cake so there's no sh the question is if mades is not eating can I can we make KES just for the so I want to be Mar them one important point laa it's hard enough to be sick it's harder to be in a hospital but the worst of it is when a person on shabas in the hospital and can't do Mitzvah the person feels dysfunctional so besides the the the the mitvah of harvest that we should make but it's a tremendous you know is depressed he doesn't have the the the energy to fight so besides the and it's a vote of confidence so I'm going to tell you right now that we're going to go through the and we're going to find any cooler that there is and but I think it's important that people should know that the the mitah we do for is more than just the Arvest or the it's a tremendous for their for their health so we're going to try to mention all the even though some might be I can't make a just for you if I'm not eating because you have to make your own there's no AR but as the says by the CL is which really means AR I can make just for you let's say I am making kidish for my family an hour from now I don't want to be in the hospital but I can make just for I how can I make for him ter is that's AR and the lumus is since I have to make sure that I make Kish I have to make sure that you make Kish if you can't I make for you so I can make KES just for you before I made Kish or which is not so practical but after I finish my sud I'll go to the hospital and make Kish for the just for the now I'm not that kid I made it already but that's the of that I can make just for whether it's before my Kish or after of course don't make it too late the has to eat and go to sleep but theoretically I can make it after my why can't I make a just for because that's and there's no of says this clearly he makes a distinction by by a regular you can make but here's what the say says not only can I make k for I can even say a the is a no not when it's part of Kes a much bigger KES I can even makees just for someone else IES is only but the dayes has become a so you can make kidish rather a person healthy for his wife or daughter that Miss Kish by day even though he's the middle of the sud ah you made a gin already that's the din of you can make Kish for someone else if they can't make their own let's say a person's not religious that's not how to make KES or now the problem is sometimes you a woman in the hospital she can make her own Kish but she doesn't want to she feels it's not a place then a husband does it so if you can't convince them or it doesn't go smoothly then they become an you know that's the they don't want to you know it doesn't pay doesn't pay to to stare the shom if they woman thinks you know I make the sudish and you make The KES that's the job so go along with it now just make sure that they being The KES some you have a either not Lucid or not or was dozing off so if they don't end up being with The KES and you're not with the Kish it's not your KES so it's a problem so again I'm not saying I to make KES well the best a if you know a person that's not fully Lucid bring along a k of cake make kidish them it's a and eat aaz of cake so then you can't go wrong even if they weren't with The KES but you were with The KES then you come again home again and you'll make again at home but again try to do that if the person's afraid that Mish they're not going to listen they they doze off they not not entirely locid again the with the Kish that you you make and again at home for whom could you make Kish just for them for the for example so it's POS a man could make for a man a volunteer could go from room to room in the hospital and make for because he's doing for each man can a man make just for a woman so again in there's no problem because the the Kish for women is equal like that to men so if arest works for man to man who for man to woman however understandably it's not done typically it's not sne that a man should make just for a strange woman but if there's no one available and is needs Kish you do you make Kish and you the of again more ideally or typically a woman should go around from room to room whoever needs kidish have woman and that would be the ideal case now a biggish is let's say the man is the and he can't make KES so it's his wife daughter any woman for that matter because women have the identical now a woman cannot blow for a man because she's not but now we all know the that it's a curse for a person that his wife is him because first of all it's not it's inappropriate get a better but the say when there's no other choice it's not a lack of if a wife makes for a husband it's not a lack of he can't do it so it's is or any woman could make for any man again if a a woman that's Works in sees a man that no one's making Kish for him let her pick up a make and there's no that's for sure the say that that's not happy about this women making for men but M like that if there's no other choice it can be done and in such a case it would be next question is when I make just for who has to drink the wine or grape juice so this is challenging because according to the and the quotes the in in Al first gim says someone has to drink if no one drinks you're not thees but more importantly in says that I should say that the hold if the mades doesn't drink The KES he's not he's not Y and no one's because mades has to drink so here we come into a more than technical problem cuz I am volunteering to make for and I'm going to make my own KES I can't drink from this KES that I'm making for cuz I'm not I'm not planning on eating here so and says that if you're making K someone else it's fine but you can't drink if you're not eating there so the question is what who's going to drink the wine I give it to the but but it can't because the same that said like that at least quotes the says I can make for someone else so here we have a gold and he says what's the insistence that the of the that you have the m has to drink CU since you're being with thees so you have to drink if you're making just for the for the so who's the's insistence who has to drink so could drink and you don't have to drink at all and I once thought maybe this would be a maybe this would be right a devoted son made of his mother but he's eating at home he says and after he finish says drink and take two ounces so what did I do I spoke out before anybody drank when you speak out then you lose the goet so first of all could be this is considered but without that I thought it's pit because heck is for the one that has to drink who would when would there be a heck problem if the mother spoke out gim shab who says that if the mades spoke out it's not a problem the ick is that the shouldn't speak out now gra I want to make a point this is also makes the by the and he tells the I'm not drinking the wine don't forget it's for you so be with my gin so really after he makes the Gin some he speaks out but not a problem the I is that the should not talk out before they drink the wine let's move on to more KES the day KES as I told you even though was just a gin the didn't say any but but there still of AR and I can make just for someone else the question is of course that that if let's say the the madesh is not eating it he doesn't want to drink the the Shea either can't or doesn't want to drink wine or grape juice can I get someone a random person another visitor or is Nurses or doctors can you please be the the the designated Drinker in other words I'm making I'm not drinking the is but not drinking can someone else drink so and many other plac say this also that makes no sense someone from that's being y has to drink how does you get a random person to drink but again I I told to make I'm try to mention any cool that I saw the he proves conclusively that really why does someone have to drink from the we see even we give it the the baby to drink why does it have to be so some she say it's a gai if no one drinks so he says that it's a gai and you give it to a baby a baby's not so maybe for the reason of gai you don't need someone that's necessarily the baby not being with the with the Gin so he says as long as the one that you call here's your girlfriend let's say I make I tell the Drinker I'm making a girlfriend I'm being you don't forget I'm not drinking and she's not drinking so then that the connection is he's being y with my Goin that would be enough so in the case that want to drink and the M want to drink get a person and say don't forget I'm being make up and just for you they could drink and they this even a cut that's right because he's now to put that again a a volunteer could go from room to room making Kish for as many people as he can this is the Mitzvah of AR but there's another unusual that we encounter in this scenario let's say I make sh and I'm to you I could do that right I'm myself so even if you don't say a typically by Kish you don't see a but if you look at earlier twice speaking about says I can make even though I'm fine making might see someone that went through a terrible sickness and he's if he says and twice the says he if he says why does he have to say the same says in that without saying so why do you have to say that if I make a without saying but I'm making it just for someone else I'm not being with that I'm making just for you then you has there has to be some connection and without a m there's no is not good the not using the even though he wants to be he wants to be with it but the point is if you don't see for some reason there's no connection and M Brewer brings this in okay others question it what's but says brings it so definitely we have to keep in mind whenever you're making just for someone else again typ it's not done but when it happens tell the person nicely now don't scare the PO don't forget to say they'll get all nervous say nicely please say and then everything will work fine again the same true I must mention I'm making the just for you don't make your own gin and say am but they're so nervous they forget and they make their own they don't say am it is sometimes but typically that's the right way to do it now a in a hospital should have but basically has to make it's not is there har for a the answer because say I could teach my child how to make a I could say so therefore I can make KES for another man or child because Harvest works even for a coton so again I can make for a boy or a girl on the along now you're wondering what is the age of that because when they're still young babies no so attempt to say what what's the what's you don't need so old I mean what's the big deal pick up a k and make a guffin and drink but it's not true because it in other words it's not is not just to Rattle off a few words and drink grape juice it's to be you have to understand what is all about and probably that's why it'sing making Kish and on Friday night and you give it to a c to drink he says the age of is six or seven years old why not four or five how how smart you have to be to say KES the teror is not a question of saying KES it has to be I did see the test he says the age is five or six but the M seems to say it's a little later because it has to be understand the he says the age of is eight or n so we see it's probably not before you know 6 or seven now the right answer is like like the Poli can say don't forget what kind of age is that five or six make up your mind six or seven make me mind ter is every child is different but definitely when a child is I could make just for the child because that's part of my even now can a be an adult now a to send a a young anle to make for the Z is not respectful you go yourself but let's say whatever reason they only have a coton available so the problem is that that the and the is only oh so there a simple let or so now what's what's the left with and the child is the so the only problem is the child ad so now you run into a suff of which is not so but better to get an adult it's appropriate for to have person question fascinating question but it comes up a volunteer wants to go to make KES for that's forsaken he has no one else but he can't make it because the time doesn't work out so he wants to make it a half hour before the of course will beab and typically in the hospital he's already getting his sud shab he's going to make KES for the be in seventh heaven and then he's going to drive home he can't make it home in time if few walks so a funny situation can I I'm but to me it's Friday I'm still having so can I make can I be for him it's shabas for me it's not so you know how do you look at that child I mean many chaplain in the hospital the rabbis chaplain they do it every Friday afternoon so again we have another gold in the beginning he says this is not a new scenario the has a sh but it's a someone who lives in in a in a a city that's not not so his perm is yalid so the Shi says can a benid lay in the Milla for a Ben because he's Jewish he's not a but it's the wrong day and the Shi says no because his perm was not maybe that's that would be analogous to but he say it's not true because the can't have least this year but you shab you could justas on the spot and make KES so now let me tell you period That's why long and they're both skeptical to say that it could be done but they if there's no other choice it would make makes sense that the that Thea should do it but I want to make a point also what best would be if he could work it out that is that he won't do any real that's the after he makes Kish let him let him get into a service and okay paying maybe is a little of a problem they'll pay before whatever it is but work it out that he get someone driving him home being in the car is not necessarily but if it's m the importance of the we definitely have a sud usually a very enjoyable mitvah but for that's hot to it's hot for him to eat and he barely could eat a minimum so I want to be very clear the the I is not the chant or the coule or the fish the is one thing a little more than a of a person can have enough food that it gets a stomach a till Tuesday but he doesn't have a of pass he wasn't says why the terror is that since it's a of suda there's no suda less than a little more than AA now that's not so much a half a slice of a cent slice of Ry bread would be a butou let's see if if a person ate and didn't have a of he was not so basically the should concentrate on the let him have a plus if he can other Foods no is you know okay says should have fish but all the three this okay but the is more than of I'm worried about healthy people today there's so much to eat they eat a bite here and a here if you don't have then besides the fact that was unwarranted because you don't make a unless a but you're not so the focus on what's the have a and whatever more they could eat is if a person could only eat a Kaz I must mention interesting not but the wres that could be only for extra okay so only we have what to be but not to make the that missed the suda Friday night could be after birth of a child child birth or St after an operation it happens very often they fell asleep woke up the next morning so here we come to another rear it's that a person did not make kdes Friday night that make the Kish the night Kish by day of course you don't say by that's only shab Mitzvah but you make the full Kish of shabas without theu then they also have a rear Mitzvah by day to try if possible to have three sudas three sudas not a it's a three sudas I wondered when they make the Kish Light the Night KES do they make another kdes to make up for the the that they're not going to make says no once you have the day by day you have the night KES that's enough if you don't have not but there's a fascinating question that has to be mentioned people don't realize this let's say a person's in a hospital and they give these slices of so you have two or more there's no so it's says that in that the really the is two Mish like the M fell double so if there's no two take two in fact if you have one one and one you add it up the is and I saw this in he's 100% right let's say you have a big piece of Kala but it's not a sh so it's could either to break it in half and have two pieces the only Shila which is challenging let's say someone has one Bila so he should break it in half so he'll have two pieces but then again you have to make a the so it's interesting kick period there are more butus is not a so is qued is this that if you have the shom in your hand you can't break it up because you have to make a br on the sh but the person that brought it to you should have been smarter and broken it before he brought it to you then you can make the on to and you have or be it not and let me the last group of questions is definitely and that is the most challenging and that is havdalah in a hospital and particularly for women so for men basically is like KES it's a they can make them they can make it or them the question is regarding women and women really basically have three shilas can they make their own havdala can they insist the husband make just for them and in the worst scenario when the husband is sick can the ISA her her wife his wife I'm sorry make just for him so the question boils down to is isah like KES if we could like KES so whatever we said by KES is true forah and we T said the woman could make her own KES a man can make just for a woman and a woman can make for a man all three shs are perfectly M so if is like Kish so if for some reason is an independent Mitzvah then we have to rethink what to do so why should I think have dollars like kidish I guess a very childish approach well it's the same thing you hold the and you make a you say a few words and you drink but maybe Tak isn't independent Mitzvah but I'll tell you why Hava might be an integral part of Kes because this might sound like a paradox but it's not the greatest KES is hav what does KES meanes is shabas the greatness of shabas but you know what a greater Kish shabas is look at me shabas I'm falling apart V of thees I need first aid but I'll take some at least hopefully that will get me back but the greatest Kish is so if we could say that K is the Kish then we're back to square one they can make for men women men can make for women and who says it's not me the rambam in the beginning of [Applause] holds that is an integral part of Kes once it's part of Kes then women are and Isa could make for a man and a man could make just for Ana all three hle like by KES that's the she of the goes with this however the in the end of he quotes is not totally in it's that women are so he's saying the r says and it's going to get it to women the is saying it's a and the explains it like I explained it to you that either it's part of or it's an independent and then it's how do we very timely question so the in the end which is obviously the so if you know the style of the of the how is he really pasing like the first now what's very troubling the comes along and so the seems to hold that women are but he mentions that the the seems to endorse the but he says beish women should not make so this aversion that women have to makeing abdah is not unfounded it's based on aama now the question the with is even if they're but why can they make why anyhow they make a at least has make lul and and and Su and the B is extremely critical of this he writes a what why did he say they can't make abdah why is it worse than as and he says and therefore I believe they can make their own even if they could listen to their husband but women are no different than any other manma that even if the part they can make their own now did not forget this simple so that when there's a like and so they do it and then they can make a once they're doing it but when there's no it's only the like by who said they could do it if the just like they don't make eyes I let them be but you don't do a when you part the other say a different when there to make dovah then women could adapt it but since so maybe there's no of but at the end of the day let me be very clear in hour the end of says that really even in the he aru on the that even if women are part they have the option of making their own but what's most important the c l he says the pasin not like the not like the the the ra and the goes with that he says but let's not forget and here the the reminds of something that is very much misunderstood he says but there's another problem with with a woman making and that is the qu that women should not drink the wine of ABD now I don't know how this mustache business got into the picture but it's a it's aw and I saw the the the other say a different reason that women should da not drink wine of the big says another why they shouldn't drink the wine of ABD I'm not going to get into that now but there's no doubt about it women should not drink the wine of ab so therefore so if according to the they're not supposed to and and they should drink the wine so therefore ideally women should not make Hava and that's why women are correct in their reluctance to make but says the in the next let's say the man already made and the woman didn't have dollar what should she do so he says how could the man make just for her it doesn't make sense because could be she not so she should make her own and drink the wine he doesn't explain why because it's not a it's not an Isa it's not it's it's it's an inion in says if the man made let the woman make and there's no doubt about it POS it you can't be because of of an inion so if the man already Madea or the woman's alone and she has no one to make make her own and drink nothing's going to happen you know every made and he gave to everybody his wives his daughters his granddaughters they all dranked AB DOA so nothing's going to happen I guarantee so PRI the way to do it is men make for women if there's no man around there's Al make her own but let's say whatever reason is she can't make her own so M that's a problem because if you hold that women a then there's no AR so he says maybe she shouldn't make they should make for her but he quotes that women are let's get that straight that's the so if need be a man can make just for a woman because we go with the assumption that women are so it's a very clear we avoid it even her making AB you could even make just for her but again the drinking is not the the deciding factor if she drinks nothing will happen guaranteed I always say this last year we had PES fell on shabas and Sunday I didn't want to tell the women that but the cas of Kes was also AB doll and they all drank and I haven't seen any mustaches around so obviously the whole thing is not a problem now the next question is a little more challenging let's say she wants to make fine but she refused to drink they tell her but she's not going to listen can she get someone to drink for her get her husband son so the EM we said earlier even by KES to get a designated drink long as with the but I must mention regarding hav there's more to be cuz some hold that that you don't have to Da drink the hav wine now we we are but there's definitely more of a for someone else to drink they have Dollar wine for her I would advise make a she should make drink a drop nothing will happen and then and someone else will drink more than that now the if no one if she doesn't want to make she can't so again for a man to make just for her the biggest but it's POS Also let's say the man is sick he's in the hospital there's no volunteers around only his wife is there so believe it or not she could get a whatever it is make for herself and even be says that we have to hold that women are now I did see the and see if youest says women cannot be but says it and I believe so here we see three sh making her own and a man making just for a woman or woman might see a man all three avoid it you could be and Hospital don't make the women into Cas say I'll make for you fine if they can't make it on their own make it for them I'll tell you more was asked by a woman her husband in the furthest possible and he comes an hour after this man and she's starving and what should she do could she eat before ABD say why E before AB just make in fact I saw B someone asked that the wife was was a she couldn't come down to the Su to hear the husband's of was down downstairs in the in the backyard and so so one R told told his fellow he should make in the house and drink wine out of the Su you r that it's not Su says why do that let him make in the Suka and she makes it in the house you see the p know that we try to avoid it but when it comes to it there's no choice so there's no choice rely on the ma the ra and many that now I personally told this someone a young and she told me every was an a deal she has to go to man but the neighbor somebody's not home so she has to go a different neighbor she has to call dress the kids get them in the car so every shabas becomes a because of and every sa is a reminder of her terrible situation I told make your own and she still benching me for that you know you make it home you're not you have to go here and there if it's very difficult we have the that you can make your own now in this case Tak I would advise her advise her she should make and give it to her her son you know this way avoid at least that issue of not drinking now the EMES some would say maybe the son if he's should be the mother because here we have but it's not true because really she's a if she's so so could be what she should do is say so she's so maybe that would be but the is to make a woman every to go through thisal I think probably is not there's not enough of a reason for that now when a girl Miss and she tells the father but you have to make for me I don't know if that's right let the girl make herself now cuz why she could make herself now if the wife gives the husband ultimatum I know I could make but you're making AB doll for me so sh his dictates make AB doll for her and rely on the now who followed the of the it's interesting they're better off because for for that make he says only because very busy with and since the brings two so not because there's have an easier deal regarding women making havd now our question that we began with the women's in a Manhattan Hospital there's no hav it's not a friendly type of hospital so basically what I told him is that really she can make her own OFA but if she wants to there's two other options number one she could extend the sh not make not say if it's if it's practical continue eating so then the only problem she wants to eat and doesn't want to fast for two hours or which is if she since she's after child birth the first three days she's eat now I a little concerned because eating before has a certain more than before KES of the of eating but says that according to that could before ABD so I told them better would be again if she can make her own if she wants to but she doesn't want to then she could wait for you to make abdah and she could eat before like like now a very is in any case that a woman is either making of or I'm making just for a woman do I also or does she also make the BR of now you're wondering what's the sh so here again it's a beautiful part of this year the says that if I I'm making for a woman the real problem is is with the hav so I make just for a woman but there's no problem with the gin or end he said why did he mention there's no problem with The N he left it out so he says that he says could be n women are even if in could be from there how could that be very postive but it's really part of but n is not part of ABD per se because if you don't have n you make AB without n m we make n and no hav right if you miss Hava you can make it till Tuesday but n only till Sunday morning what's the is AZ that's not part of Kes so what is it reallyi now no one says it before him and even he says it this will make sense but this has a great impact that means that LE the women when if they do say the Kish together with the men they shouldn't make the they shouldn't say or yet sometimes the man the man makes all the bras and the women make their own bras they make the the and why they doing that so says that is not at all because it's not a is not limited to it's just that's when you have them it's it seem that the is that the women do make the of again before mentioned this just a few tidas I wanted to mention in a hospital typically there's no a of course you could light two two matches and make quickly but and it's not right so what happens if there's no a nothing so you without it the man goes home after making a dollar for his wife in the hospital let her make a until Sunday morning B typically unless you bring it Advance is not in a hospital to make un synthetic is not a good idea it's not really a if you have a bouquet of flowers that that has a very strong natural smell not a spray you can make a br on that roses typically we make but thean of is by every we always make and the last question which is is is it an option to anybody not Al Whatever It Is to over telephone so we discussed this at length that really over telephone you're not hearing the real Hava or any BR for that matter especially today's with the analog voice it it's a whole different way of the phone working it breaks up the voice into little small digital pockets and transfers it but it's not the original voice so most po hold anything over the phone is not better than nothing it's nothing you're not hearing it from regarding Milla and regarding seems to say maybe they could be but I want to tell you what I I know this from did not go with that in fact he was asked says he he sent and what's better over the telephone from whatever her father or make her own don't must not to make her own goes better make her own but the was made someone made for an old every one week he was out of town so he said he can either make AB doll over the phone for the am or Sunday morning when he gets back he'll go special make for her on Sunday morning a double Sunday morning and a man for a woman says better Sunday morning so over the phone is not an option better find other options like with tug to you for listening for fore [Music] speee should be with learning them and shouldn't have to become so the seek just let what we learn today first of all the importance of doing a we should try whatever possible to do whenever possible but the basic is like like men no suff they can make their own women and need be even men it's not so hard to make Kish cup that has four plus ounces or even 3.3 and even disposable cup and drink two ounces of grape juice that's all you need the the one that's M doesn't have to drink from at all the is that the has to eat has to drink a that cannot eat or drink plus he either on a feeding tub orus is not Kish no to Kish if you're not in they should have whether it's or any Praise of like we do there is an option making as we as we described it or even a big piece of big cake that's enough to be considered a shab someone that's going to visit and and needs to eat something to the Long Walk Home they could be by eating a kazas of cake or a of wine and they can actually be with that KES there is AR for men and women we not but basically a man can make for a woman or vice versa of course and other things you make for the same gender but or certainly for a relative a man can make for a woman or vice versa even for a k should be made because there is AR for typically the drinks not the and that's good enough even because the is the one that's being y if the mades was M before the the sh drank that's not a problem it's According to some a a the the is that some that the person that's being has to drink a volunteer go from room to room and theoretically make tens of kides Friday night and 10 the age of should be approximately six or seven years old a coton could be an adult if they're both if the adult made then they have a with someone who's not yet will say that he's just he didn't do it yet but he's he could make who's ready on in shabas the shabas the is more a little more than of pass but then you don't make if a person misses and the Friday night make KES by day without and three that should be had by day two pieces are good for one whole it's a question should you break it or not but a two pieces or one and one piece is definitely a good enough don't make or drink Hava that's true that's fact we try to avoid it but if need be women can make their own abdala a woman could make just for for a man and a man can make just for a woman when need be in those cases of course the one that's making ABD should drink if it's the woman she has to drink as well we saw a fascinating shil about that in such a case do and let the woman make their own AB that finds it hard to go find people to to have like AER case could make her own and each is with a coton if they both have it easier regarding hav in a Manhattan Hospital someone stuck in the hospital they could eat without AB they have to wait for the till the man comes to make AB for them the sh of is a tricky issue but the minut seems to be the are considered in there a will'll be without a when you get home B them also and over the telephone should definitely be avoided