Inspired

inspired is a great presentation by together with yob Solomon showing that how much each of us can do can do for is there are so many so many people that just with a little bit of K inviting someone for a chabas can we imagine what we do for a person or for a family we invite them over for shabas they don't know what it's all about and with this presentation we will learn how much very minute small matter can be people actually tell us that is like a just have to blow on a g just so it's a flame just to bring out the flame it's a coal that's little covered with ases just blow it and the entire spectrum of light comes out we can bring out these Nas I can tell you so many stories that would be just with with Clinic with minute matters your people get inspired people have such a the a person by nature is a islamit he wants to learn and he wants to hear especially which is really thriving and thirst thirsty for for for for because and by us bringing out that we do so much we can bring [Music] is something important sure yeah do you do some K that's another question ask if you think is important yes yes do you do some no some people are afraid to do c of some people don't want to be bothered why wouldn't they want to be bothered you got to ask them I'm busy doing other things is something important no is it something important yes do you do some my son does it for me I don't think it's a good influence on his children but he doesn't L do you know any people who are not from no if you met somebody would you want him to become from yes what would you do I don't know why don't people do more of you think um unfortunately people don't feel that close to each other they think that a Russian is Russian he's not a Jew and they think yemenite is a yite not a Jew they probably don't realize the importance of it because all of all of yish kite is involves kir even people that from become Clos to themselves there's always room for kir why don't people do more kir maybe maybe because not trying to I guess I have no idea honestly no no idea it's such a wonderful thing K it's a very important to do you do no if someone who was more religious was going to approach you and invite you to their home for Shabbat or give you a Jewish book or something like that how would you react to that I would go with that I'd like that have you ever thought about becoming more religious or at times I've read some books I'm considering you know exploring a little more my Judaism what does being Jewish mean to you I actually didn't find out I was Jewish until last year after my Grandma had passed away my grandma was a survivor of the Holocaust and ever since I've had a whole new perspective and I've been trying to learn the culture but it's tough especially with Grandma being gone how religious are you would you consider yourself uh spiritual but not uh I don't attend synagogue how come um I'm married to a Christian um and laziness how would they have to approach you what would be the right way probably through my family I guess um I have a daughter who's five a son as I said who's 11 um to what it would bring to them potentially might be a way it's certainly true the older I get the more interested I am and and the more parts I'd like to learn about and the more parts I feel I've missed over the years on a scale of uh 1 to 10 how important is your jewishness it's somewhere between nine I'm really proud of my jewishness I'm not I'm not trying to hide it I'm not trying to embrace it but between nine to8 would you be open to someone uh teaching you more about your Jewish Heritage if the offer was there yeah I mean if it was you know someone who looked friendly and definitely if it was someone I knew you know I know I know a lot of people who do that you know and if they asked yeah [Music] sure the person who's atoning or coming back has tasted and returned so I think there's something very uh there's a lot of texture there's a lot of color there's a lot of thought a lot of courage in a BAL chuba I mean it's an affirmative Choice it's saying I'm choosing to change that to me is huge I was actually uh dating a a a Cuban woman she was not Jewish at a certain point I realized if I were to marry this woman my children wouldn't be Jewish [Music] you imagine a person living their whole life and not connected to the buch I mean that is a tragedy that was me that was absolutely me and the almighty said the and he got me right and we all have the opportunity to be we all have the opportunity to be Messengers you know of the almighty tell us if we're of the almighty we're representing the almighty there's we're going to get we're going to get tremendous help from above and I see it I see it every day it's so easy to write people off based on how they dress how they act and what they do and I was not a good candidate to become observant I wasn't going through a crisis I was doing very well successful in terms of secular society enjoying my life so it wasn't like I was looking for something nothing was missing you would look at me and say there's nothing here there's no hook to get this guy and if I could be gotten anyone can I'd be surfing in a jungle in Indonesia with a couple guys and one of them is a born- again Christian who's like he's got a Jew to work on while we're in the jungle together um but they they always boiled down to like faith everything was like you know all you got to do is believe you know and I I wasn't interested in that people go elsewhere to other religions because they're not being filled and because there is no real true exposure Ure to the beauty of Judaism and to the relevance of [Music] Judaism when I was in college you would go through a course after course and to get a piece of something that actually like will light up your insights I maybe had two professors in four years and those two professors maybe said one or two things somewhere along the line in a on a whole semester that moved me when I got to Shiva I was like I was I was overdosing every single day you'd learn a Kaz You' learn a madis you'd learn AA You' learn and it was just like whoa hold on hold on I can't process all this from people often times say I don't know enough I don't know enough I can't work with somebody or answer their questions so the answer to that is most nonr people are nonr not because they're anti- Tor they just don't know any Torah I don't really know how to do kiru but I know that if if from people uh have a smile if they're happy if they treat their spouses with respect if they don't scream with their kids uh if they give to staka if when they pray it's sincere and you could tell when someone's praying sincerely um if they make their bras out loud and it looks like they're talking to God that has tremendous impact on on secular Jews they they sense the [Music] sincerity the time is m for sure first of all we haven't had in at least 2,000 years not once about cha movement like we have today we are's children imagine the pain to when he sees his children lost what more could you do for than bring back his children to him [Music] I was born in this country 70 years ago and the Army I was in a theatrical group and then I became a producer and director I made films television [Music] everything and I was 40 years old old I met a man zberman and um it was a planned meeting I didn't know I'm going to fall into a trap and I fall fell into the Trap and he said to me the sentence that changeed my life because we argued I was in a in a leftist youth organization called and um he said to me I can prove to you that the Torah was given by the Creator in Mount s I almost 4,000 years [Music] ago said what did you say the word fact and proof said yes said prove it to me and then uh after 3 four five meetings I I realized this is it and I went out from his house and said to myself well what am I doing with this I couldn't even put a y I put the Y on my head and I looked in the mirror and it it became sh before my eyes because I never realized that I can go that I will never go with a on my head cuz I was very famous in this country and I had an image and this was the image and I was living my image you [Music] know and I sat in my home had a big house in Jaffa [Music] and then I light shabas candles once a week with a once a week that's all gave me such it was such an opening unbelievable and it began with this only mitz it was a very difficult mitzah to accept because this first time in my life that I understood that I have to do something which doesn't come for myself that I do it because I I'm obligated by by a power which is exterior to me which which demands me which commands me to do it I didn't even think that I'm going to leave my life that I I was keeping my things I was doing films everything and I kept the Mitzvah this show was everything almost nobody knew about it but I was keeping it as a minimum thing when I find found out what toise and I began to learn Torah this really changed my life cuz the whole thing that was the the center of my life films I'm a Creator I'm doing films came so small so unimportant [Music] unimportant then we went to to Jerusalem we said only as experience you know just to see a few months what it is to to D in a minion to be in a place where you can learn tah together so we went as a vacation for a few months and this vacation lasts now for 27 [Music] years this is our heritage this is our tradition this is our wisdom this is the thing that held am soil together all the history let's look into it a few minutes every week 15 minutes a week let's go come when Tuesday Wednesday when is convenient for you we learn 20 minutes 15 minutes that's all and this makes the miracle the soul connects itself with the with the sanctity of the Torah with the wisdom of the Torah and this is It's a birth it's a birth a man becomes a [Music] [Applause] newborn don't be afraid you are bringing these homes of these people the greatest treasure in the world you bring them light into the light don't be ashamed come and say we don't have money we didn't come for any organization we don't want to do anything we came to learn toah together with you 15 minutes be secular don't put nothing at all let's learn to together 15 minutes in Israel we even say it even better we come in and say let's learn 15 minutes for the safety of the soldiers of of of our army let's 15 minutes for for am I said okay 15 minutes why not and they begin and this is it and they come again next week and second third week and then things [Music] change I try and learn as much as I can but the Torah obliges me to go out and do the k thing so I have to do it I'm doing it all the is from and everybody everybody saying that this is what we have to do these leaders are shouting to us every day say this every B everyone has to do the thing can you give them a better thing than that you bring them happiness you bring connection with the K you bring sanctity into the houses peace love beauty wholeness to be a Jew what's greater than that you bring them back to the [Music] father what what can be greater than that this is our we have to exploit it [Music] now I think it's something that's important that should be every person should feel an and responsibility as a part of the Jewish Nation to uh go out and do why is that why is it so important it's something is if you would see let's say your brother God forbid falling off a cliff of course you'd go around and save him so if you see your brother spiritually falling down a cliff you got to go and you got to go out there and save him why don't more people do care of more from people it's I guess it's something they're never exposed [Music] to this is this is the blood of our brethren we have to think to ourselves these are people if we have any way to reach them any way to communicate with them or serve as an example for them when you are waiting online at the bank when you're driving your car when you are talking doing business on the phone you wear yamako or a shital people are looking at you and if you cut aead in line or you respond in an impolite way there's a non-religious Jew standing there watching you the opportunity be on without taking any care of seminars and without learning about Evolution just by the way you behave on the street and uh the way you behave in interactions can make a tremendous difference I think people are smart enough to realize that the secular solutions to the human dilemma aren't working and although in the short term they very hopefully buy into the seven habits of successful people or know these other secular systems but you know o over a few months or few years they realize that that's not going to be the solution so they're looking for something that really will be the solution and Tor really works so when they hear it it sounds like it would work and when they try it they see it does work they keep coming back for [Music] more as of maybe 7 years ago or so I started becoming more observant before that I was completely secular I was apathetic which is even worse because at least when you don't like something you come to the table with some emotion you care a little bit about it I didn't care about the fact that I didn't care which really puts you out of the money someone could have come along 5 years 10 years earlier and it may have become religious earlier but the truth is there's something for everyone in Judaism you can't connect with anyone unless you approach them and you know people talk about you have to be an expert you should you know know how to do ciru anyone that does it is an expert the expert is simply someone that does it you're not going to get everyone all the time there are people that come in the doors that go out the doors at the end of the day you have to try cuz if someone didn't try with me I wouldn't be sitting here by them just showing their love showing that they're real bringing people in and showing them their life they'll become they'll they'll just show that they're the light light to the nation just by through example cuz I grew up next to two of the largest Jewish neighborhoods in the world burrow Park and Flatbush and not once did anybody reach out it was like there's two different worlds there's still this this barrier we have to break that barrier by just showing that we're there are brothers and sisters [Music] well my running joke was that Judaism has its ups and downs meaning that all it mattered to me was okay now it's time to stand up now it's time to sit down now it's so I would say Judaism has its ups and downs but as far as I was concerned it was really Judaism was a corpse I grew up in Manhattan on the upper west side and I went to public school and then I went to an Episcopal in school and I graduated and went to Bates College in Maine and my interest was Outdoors uh hiking backpacking canoeing um sleeping under the stars and that that was pretty much my life I came back to New York to get a job I worked in social work and with homeless people I felt that my my own tradition the Judaism was really irrelevant I thought it was fraught with contradictions it didn't make sense to me that any spiritual path uh would only be 2 days a year going to Temple or synagogue and that just didn't seem to make any sense to me I was really looking for a direct connection with God I was looking for spirituality a spiritual life a path to follow the reason why I thought it was a corpse was that it seemed that the the whole goal of the religion was self-preservation of the religion not because there was any inherent meaning and so just to be part of something that's just there to perpetuate itself without giving of any of the spirit of it seemed to be a waste of time I didn't know what Kish or bris was um it was very very secular background we did have a Seder but really the idea was you know how quick can we get this over with not why don't we really delve into the hagada I remember one one incident um where I was back from school from college and I went back to my old synagogue and it happened to have been rashash Shana although I didn't even know that it was and I remember I went there and and they asked me if I had a ticket I said a ticket for what you know it's not like this is a ball game or anything and they said no you need a ticket for a seat and I said this is what this religion's come to you need a ticket just to come to Temple I didn't even realize that it was a holiday that you actually it's a tradition to buy tickets for Holiday services but I was so turned off by that and so angry about that you know and then they were questioning me uh did you really belong to the Sho and I said well is bar mitford here you know and he said okay you know maybe we'll check the records and I said forget about it and I just walked away and I was very much uh turned [Music] off people go elsewhere to other religions because they're not being filled and because there is no real true exposure to the beauty of Judaism and to the relevance of Judaism I remember growing up on the west side there were people every Saturday that I saw on West End Avenue I only lived on ribsside Drive which is one block away going up and down the Avenue and it was like we lived in different worlds completely as far as I was concerned they were the [Music] Amish during my collegiate career I went to India and Thailand and uh on a Buddhist studies program intensive meditation and Buddhist philosophy and ended up spending a month also in Thailand as a novice monk I with a saffron robes and a shaved head and a begging Bowl the whole thing [Music] I was in the middle of a 9-day silent Retreat uh I don't know if you can imagine being silent for 9 days was quite intense and it seemed to me that since I so much believed in this idea of karma that everything happens for a reason then there must be some reason that I wasn't born in an Asian body I wasn't born in an Asian country and so for myself I had to reconcile why I was born in a American Body in a with a with a Jewish nshama I guess although I didn't have that terminology yet and so I came back to the United States to finish my uh bachelor's degree and my undergraduate thesis was comparing Zen Buddhism andic Judaism it wasn't until I went to graduate school to yiva University that I started to meet people who were religious and that I could relate to and we were I was invited to shabas dinners and and that's really where that started to take off I had met my wife prior to becoming religious we became religious together what was that that was um very intense unfortunately um I'm very thankful to God that we were on the same page the whole time we were able to process it together I remember we you know we made so many mistakes uh the first shabis meal that we went to um Sharon had had given flowers and we were so struck because they just seemed like they didn't know what to do with the flowers we're like what's the big deal put them you know rip off the paper put them in a vase what's the big deal of course later we realized that you know there were certain issues I remember we turned off the lights um we felt badly afterwards you know for the for the rest of the shopice then they had to go to the bathroom in the dark but um they were very tolerant and forgiving of us and that was what really brought us in was the way in which they seem sincerely interested in us as people and it wasn't like we were their project it was just that they wanted to get to know us as [Music] people I'm part of of an ongoing story which started thousands of years ago and which uh will end up with Messiah and and Beyond and so the big picture and one of the things that's been very important to me has been an identification with the Jewish people and the Jewish story there's more and more from people in the workplace as lawyers as doctors I just think that there's such a tremendous opportunity to be role models in secular settings I can't tell you how many times people have come up to me um I I was used to work part-time in nursing homes and West Indian people would come up to me and ask me for a braa they said well you're one of the chosen people so I think it is Inc coming upon us not not just to be role models and the light unto the other nations but also the light unto our own nation and um not to be afraid to take on that role to take on that responsibility the best for I into Judaism is to go to a Jewish wedding because it's such a happy event and everybody's having a good time and um I think my association with judism was always like such a burden it was like o ve you know like we have to sit in SHO for hours and hours listen to dribble that we didn't even understand and for something that's happy and for something that U people can identify with that would be my um advice to people not not to be afraid to reach out and say good shabas to people even if you know that they're not religious because it it does have an [Music] impact it makes me feel very sad that there are a lot of people who grew up the way that I did it particularly in New York but when you're ignorant you don't know that you're ignorant you think that you know something so realizing that I really didn't understand the religion and that there really is something to it that is relevant and alive and exciting and fun I can't imagine my life without it and I I feel uh even to the core of my being it's how I identify myself I was embarrassed growing up to identify myself as Jewish that was it was something to be ashamed of now I feel that it's something to be proud of now I would identify myself I do identify myself was a Jewish American before it was just I'm an American I'm a New Yorker and Jewish was like something that you said you know under your breath uh in an ashamed way I'm I'm thrilled to be Jewish and I'm thrilled to be uh connected to Torah and the people and role models that I've met along the way and continue to learn from now is is just astounding for me [Music] [Applause] about 15 years ago a synagogue in Philadelphia conservative synagogue Philadelphia invited a Buddhist Guru to their Friday night service to give it some spirituality why do they have to fite a Buddhist because for them it was clear Judaism has no spirituality it has customs and laws and maybe some clever philosophy and some old worn out Tunes but no spirituality so you have to go to Buddhism to find spirituality same in Israel by the way so many Israelis go to India they haven't the clue that their own tradition has a spiritual base in my uh mid teens late teens I began becoming very interested in uh spirituality psychology and I began investigating various religions and Judaism was one of them [Music] you grow up in in the secular World everything's part of this this religion there that religion it's all good you like chocolate ice cream you like vanilla ice cream it's you know it doesn't make any difference everything is power of it's all it's all the same the sh is expressing itself and there's an internal need that draws them in in this [Music] direction I looked for a teaching job in the West Bank in rala Jordan I looked for something in IR r i was teaching in a Quaker School at that point on the side and I wanted something exotic the hash being what it was I wound up uh with a teaching job in Israel which I never got to uh I'm one of the uh the mayor Schuster guys who uh met if you know the name mayor Schuster but someone who stands that the Western Wall invites people unsuspecting youth into yeshivas the truth is I was looking for him though uh one of the rare birdss that was actually trying to find him because I had read a brochure when I was on the kots that I'd spent two months on that there was this very uh charismatic Rabbi in Jerusalem young man who had been a Marxist who had walked into the rabbi and within the course of an hour had given up Marxism and decided to study Torah the rest of his life and I was very anxious to meet the rabbi because I figured in an hour I could turn him around uh plus I heard it was free room and board in theiva which uh was significant to me so when I saw mayor Schuster I I accepted his invitation very readily after an hour spent with a rabbi uh I realized it was going to take much more time than an hour to turn him around were you always a very outgoing guy no so so tell me how did you overcome it I was I was a shy person but you know sometimes you have to do something you do it that's all kir is is the most important thing in the world today because we're losing so many it's the most important thing so that it's imperative that you to care of to to to reach out to try to help somebody [Music] my parents are both born here in very American um they have this wonderful sense of gratitude toward America and they believe in the Melting Pot and they believe in the promise of America for [Music] everyone I had came from a traditional home my father had a wonderful sense of tradition and he's just a he was a wonderful man uh tremendous values but he was not observant and he came from the time where people worked on Sabbath they uh tried to keep a semblance of being kosher but they weren't anywhere near what we would call observant today although my father always had and my mother this tremendous this core sense of gratitude tremendous sense of appreciation for life's blessings and God's blessings [Music] so I grew up uh in a kind of free environment with clearly there was no sense of Torah as being a guiding force I had been going to non-observant camps Jewish but completely secular and I saw the culture and even though I was not observant I said this can't be right this cannot be the way uh it should be [Music] so now I go to seminar and I see there's another alternative and there's another set of values that's being offered and then here those same values had shabas as a part of them and kosher and prayer but I had a resistance that I'll call the cool Factor you're a 16-year-old kid how you going to be religious and cool [Music] and you know again you know God God runs the world he sent the antidote to the cool factor which was he sent a guy named Ricky con to this seminar Ricky con was a senior in my high school when I was a freshman and he was the coolest guy around smart articulate and he had gone to Israel for a year and now had come back and was very observant and he was my adviser and here was this guy who was you know cooler than cool saying talking about the value of Torah and a religious life and as one of my teachers said to me when he came up to visit that weekend he goes yeah you Ry wears nicer sweaters than you do you know and I said hey if he can if he can be religious and cool it's a possibility you can do it and so at 16 I came home from a Thanksgiving shabbaton and I told my mother that I wouldn't have an ice cream birthday cake that Sunday night because I had to meet dinner and she really got upset and that was the beginning of me keeping chabas and being kosher and um the beginning of a journey to quote uh Rabbi shiman green Who quotes his Rabbi Rabbi Goldstein he says you want somebody to have a religious experience have a religious experience in front of them just be genuine in yourself in your life life and that'll that'll be heard and it'll be seen and it'll be felt but you have to invite the people so they can see it and watch it and hear it just be committed to being close to others and letting others into your life I was a bit familiar with uh the concept of resistance when it came to getting married to me it seemed like Mount Everest and I can say this clearly it would have taken many more years for me to get married had I not connected to Torah without Torah I think my life would have had less meaning less Joy less purpose and critically less Direction I probably would have missed out on some critical relationships in my life even with my father uh because becoming more observant um brought me closer to my father uh and in many ways ironically I would have been much less [Music] me well I attend uh services on the high holy days uh I observe I keep kosher for Passover all through the eight days uh I help my family bulas sua um I uh I'm fairly observant among the overall scheme of things in the overall population I guess you would say that so but so you don't put on filling or keep shops or anything but I used to oh you used to why why did you stop doing it I um I don't know it kind of left kind of left me but I'm pretty sure that by the time I get married I'll be returning to it so why do you feel that way I'm going to want my kids to grow up in a house that's you know surrounded with Judaism if if I could say I missed one thing that I would like to reinsert in my life life it was the fact that we never started Shabbat dinners which I think created a big void uh in my life so if I was going to follow you know for I was going to insert one thing which unfortunately I'm you know behind the curve now that would have been something that I would have loved to have instituted and then other things might have grown from that it's a part of I guess you know what we're about you know and my my lack of knowledge doesn't close me off to that it's about bringing people closer you know know some of those people are going to come fully observant some of those people are going to go from working on rashash to going to some of those people are going to go from partying on Friday night to maybe having a shabas meal and then going home watching television is different levels of observance and some people who become fully FR over many many years some people they hit it right away and some people it's a long process and people wind up at different levels people need to be guided people need to be spoken to don't be afraid to reach out to people cuz there's always a hesitancy to like well I don't know so even if you're busy even if you have a lot of things in your mind I mean this should just be there somewhere you know you have to think about like how do I make someone who's totally secular totally observant that's not really you know the question is how can I bring people closer to their Judaism how can I have people connect to their Judaism and it's better for you also you know helps you connect in some some better way I to see the Jews walking and I used to think my gosh get at least a bicycle I mean it's so hot and there fitting and I'm thinking come on you know get with the [Music] times if you would have put on paper what I was doing and who I was and what kind of mentality and attitude I had and say would this person ever become religious I would score zero on on whatever test we would come up with but if you look at somebody and say no way there's no way you say those words you're making a huge mistake a huge mistake because I would have been that person that people probably said no way to lots of times if it weren't for the one person that said maybe maybe maybe [Music] I was born in vinna I finished University there and lived in Moscow I was already a child of the Six Days War soall after the Six Days War all the Jews in the Soviet Union everywhere were very enthusiastic about what nobody knew exactly but General Jewish enthusiasm on another hand it was a dictatorial uh tyrannic country with the Communist party and with bnv as the chief and it so your enthusiasm has to be somehow expressed uh we expressed it with our desire to go to Israel didn't know anything about Judaism and I started to learn Hebrew in 7172 and then I start understood that I have to read something of the original sources these sources were tanak and Torah after reading the sepharim uh I understood that this is the way of life that I want to live it took me 5 Years From the Beginning till I understood that I can start to teach others I was the first in KIRO among people up to 40 50 years old and I was called so-called Moscow Rabbi by all all the refus all the Jewish people who wanted to know something because on every holiday I made a speech there in the woods outside of Moscow remember nobody allowed us to get uh room to get uh apartment or anything everything had to be centine secret so we went to out of Moscow into woods and I started to teach them and invented methods how to teach [Music] some elderly Jew told me that KGB were interested what is the future of young people studying Judaism and some elderly people maybe sincerely said no future nobody will keep kashrus nobody will keep shabas so some crazy people no so the KGB thought that they no threat and this they allowed me to work for three years and after these three years they understood that they made mistake because when I left Moscow there were about 300 religious people left behind about 100 women were going to mik and zero were going when I started so this was like uh from 0 to 300 is a it's a [Music] something many times I cannot sleep at night when I think what is the small percentage of of zervant Jews are in the world and how it could be not 20% in Israel or maybe 10% in America but it could be 70% 60% if you would work if you take all us thousands upon thousands of Jews who are intellectuals who have Jewish knowledge and go out to reach out our brothers and what is the difference between me and another Jew no difference we are children of Aram is and yob Abraham he he didn't have his son he didn't have children but he prayed for another person aimik and because he prayed for another person he cared about him he was given his son it a year later so when we care about one person forget what thousands next door you will be answered to your needs to your personal needs you will be answered it's a super egoistic and never L excellent approach care about somebody else you will be Cared by the almighty and he has Resources by the [Music] way how you doing what's your first name Kan where you from New York where where in New York Brooklyn where in Brooklyn Bar Park Bar Park where's that it's of uh of of America what are you doing here learning in miva how long are you here uh six years six years is that something important you think very important why is that the main part of yish guide is to feel feel for for each other and just because we had the chance of the of being brought up from does we should give we should spread our life shouldn't be selfish who said that a person has to give a tithe of his time Myer of his time to K I would tell a person you have a responsibility to do something to sit and do nothing you cannot do now you have other responsibilities and you're not a trained professional one 10 minute gesture a week call someone write an email uh speak to somebody online at at the bank hello who are you one 10 minute justest a week but miss you're not Bing kidish Friday night until you know that you made that gesture if you're not interested in doing Outreach for the sake of helping others do it anyway for the for your own sake just to see how it feels when you've changed someone's life the most hidic guy in William B he can just open up you know and and think about you know the next time he's in Manhattan he's conducting business with his with his I don't know what who it is you know the guy who who who is his tailor and he sees that he's Jewish if he can have him you know invite him for Shabbat he will come if he if he's persistent enough it pays off there's there's probably the greatest payoff cuz you you've affected someone's life you've shown him that he can develop himself into a better person we were standing at the door and he just said would you read a book if I gave it to you and I said sure and it was not a big deal and I think that one gesture changed my whole life radically if you can show them in a nonthreatening way right that you're on their side you want to help them and they because secular Jews are really interested in Torah we just don't know it the problem is that the religious Jews think the secular aren't relig aren't interested and the secular Jews think the religious aren't interested in them that's the problem there a Gap over here right if we could just bridge that Gap a little bit then we can change the world anyone who really understands what kiru is about realizes that they are doing God's work they are becoming God's Emissary that his hand so to speak in this world to accomplish the essence of what God wants accomplish in this world there's nothing more profound than that I remember my brother said he goes it's relevant he goes it's got something to do with your life right now and then it's little by little by little a shabas a lecture a Shear a Shmo this a tape and before you know it you know 10 minutes before shabas you're ripping toilet paper [Music] hi everybody I was really a crazy guy growing up you I was really nuts in the sports and the parties and everything people basically thought I'd be dead or in jail I was throwing huge parties in the home I grew up in we had 2 in the morning on a weekly basis there would be 40 police cars squad cars outside the house two helicopters hovering over our backyard you know Yelling dispers to the crowds of people there I mean we were I was majorly involved in like life an experiential life you know and surfing and mountain bike and camping and and these parties my family my parents gave us uh were two major things lots of love no rules and so we really had no rules growing up and we were they never made any pretense of what was wrong or right they just said you go check it out for yourselves so I'm one of four brothers and we we just went and tried everything we really did it's kind of like the the yro [Music] story surfed 68 hours a day for 12 years uh internationally surf some of the biggest waves in the world and uh it was in top shape and uh if I wasn't surfing I was Hardcore off-road mountain viiking and that was my main thing so one stage was just California Bliss of partying and surfing in sports and and the the other stage was I I started getting a little disenchanted with the whole thing I kind of got saturated with all the surf [Music] sessions I was asking questions about the the nature of things nature of existence like is there any meaning in this world I asked and asked and asked and in all my travels you I met every kind of person I met and I think the only person I didn't meet was an orthodox Jew I'd be surfing in a jungle in Indonesia with a couple guys and one of them is a born again Christian who's like he's got a Jew to work on while we're in the jungle together um but they they always boiled down to like faith everything was like you know all you got to do is believe you know and I I wasn't interested in that I I needed my mind appealed to and uh and no one was really appealing to my mind I wound up traveling in Europe I played I play music professionally so I played in 17 countries in Europe and somewhere along the in that trip to Europe I became an atheist cuz I can't see God I'm not going to believe in I'm certainly not going to live my life as if there is one so I became a kind of a humanistic you know lover of mankind the only thing I knew that was real was love it was around that point that my father's business that year a year before went down the tubes yeah so for the first time in my life I needed money to go somewhere I used to just call my dad at say send your driver with the surfboards and the bathing suits I grew up you know he had a very successful business so we had you know we really had everything in fact Dustin Hoffman lives in the home that I grew up in so my brother calls me in Santa Barbara and says how would you like a free ticket to Europe I said that's exactly what I need I'm I'm finishing school in a week I want to leave and he says well I got you a free ticket to Europe I said what's the catch he says you just got to be in Jerusalem for 6 weeks after those six weeks you can fly to Europe so I agreed I packed my surfboards gave them to my parents I'd send these to Europe and flying off to uh Israel so I came to Israel and I was with a guitar in my back tie-dye colorful shirt Guatemalan clothes long hair frizzy hair and I kind of had a feeling I knew I was coming to this religious institution and I had been Street philosophizing my whole life so I kind of thought like I was going to take all these guys and free them from their Yeshiva experience and bring them all home to their families you know Judaism would have been folklore and fairy tales so I I got here and you know I was already starting up with guys here and talking to them about things and uh philosophizing with the Yeshiva Boys and I they'd ask me questions like you know if everyone's right then I suppose you think Hitler's right or something like that well no Hitler wasn't right well how do you know Hitler is not right and and uh you know if it's all relative you know maybe that's okay maybe murder's okay well I said murder is not okay well how do you know Murder is not okay and you know all kinds of little traps like that and the amazing thing was is that all the questions I had since I was 11 years old till I was 23 this is now 23 it's a 12E span during all those years and all my my questions they were finally getting answers I was slowly starting to get a feeling like well I better listen up a little more because I it could be I don't have the patent on reality and you know I was being humbled in these conversations what happened on the 7th 8th and 9th days um was the discovery seminar it was an incredible breakthrough for me it was I realized at that point that this is real that it is true there is a God that and that he's not only God but he's the god of Mount Si and at that point I was observing from that moment on I've been observing ever since I called my parents I said please don't send the surfboards don't send them to Europe cuz I'm not going to Europe and they said why not I said this is the last stop you this is it I'm here and and they they showed up in Israel they came to get me out of Yeshiva and they said you're coming home with us and I said okay said really you'll come home and they said I said yeah but you know how long can you be here they said well we could be here two weeks she said okay have shabas come meet the Riva do Discovery you know experience what I'm doing here so at the end of the two weeks they said you just stay right here I was I cut my my hair right before they arrived you know so they were like well someone got them to cut his hair you know so my parents were pretty excited to see that things were going to work out for me but by the time they got to La I had already arranged a teacher to come teach them every Friday the para they wound up coming to Israel to learn Hebrew they said but they wound up learning fulltime in Yeshiva and they became observant at that point um they wind up living here for 6 months in the old city and learning Torah here they wound up moving into a house in uh the Pacific Palisades Malibu area and they wound up building a Sho with a few other families to make the first you know observant you know H in uh in that area on the beach there where they live now and uh and my brother who sent me I started sending home these giant this was before email or anything I was sending home 25 page letters to him on the veracity of the experience and what are you doing with your life and and and he um he also he became observant at that point and then the my other older brother you know what I said to him I said to him that um you know why so many people join Cults you know or people join CES why people wind up really staying in the Colts I said it's because their loved ones don't get them out like what have you done to get me out of here cuz he was really upset he thought I would definitely join a cult and he was big businessman with the m matching phone BMW and suit you know in La running a business and you know I said to him you know you know you're not getting me out of here I'm already in you know I've lost my objectivity like get me out of here and so he he said what do I got to do I said why don't you take the discovery seminar and argue it out with them if you can somehow beat them in their arguments you know tell me about it we'll get out of here together so he did the program and after the program he comes up to me and he says I need you to follow me around on this chabas I said why he says I want to keep one chabas in my life okay I followed him around all shabas and literally I everything he did I told him he could do he couldn't do and uh and he kept his shabas and he went off and did his own thing only later to become you know fully observant and he wind up dropping his business and became a rabbi when someone becomes observant there's a time that many Yeshiva guys go through like the the blues what happened basically is I started getting really depressed and I mean I got to the point where I was just like really in bad shape and they had me shipped off to every kind of counselor every Rabbi I mean everyone tried to help me so at one point I was dancing in toos AR simp B cha and I'm dancing around with all the and one of my friends says to me meet me in carene so I said where's carlen he says says go down May sharim and turn right so I danc a little more and then I went down Mayar and I was feeling a little lost you hear music everywhere so I just asked someone do you know where carlen is he said yeah it's right up these stairs now that was pin carlen it was a different carlen than Carlin stolen so I go up the stairs to pince carlen open the door and these Kum see me and they're just like abala hey they grab me in the middle of the C I know how to dance you know cuz from my background I I can dance so I am dancing with these pum to like 3 in the morning I mean we just kept going and going I'm in the center circle dancing and they were so warm to me and one of them spoke a little bit of English and he said I want you come for chabis I first met him in sh for the doing and they're screaming at the top of their lungs and they're jumping up and down and they're just like they are completely going they're going crazy and they're doing and and when I got to his house it was also like a mad scene and the there was dancing going on and all kinds of carrying on and at that point I realize I was home they dunked me in the mix for the next day you know on the way to sh like I woke up they had me sleep over no one ever has me sleepover and you know I love the water I'm a surfer you know like you put me in the water so I was like I was in heaven I'm I'm in the Mikvah I'm dancing I'm screaming I get in the shore I'm screaming out in English you I only knew of pray in English at the time you know all of a sudden they get quiet at the end of the paragraph and I'm like and praise the Lord you know what whatever the art scroll sitter said and everyone's like looking at me like what is that you I've got a whole like circle of your shomi little kids just like staring at me the whole time I started going there every week that was it and all of a sudden depression lifted and I I found myself at that point in Judaism [Music] the greatest part of my week is putting on my stral and putting on my vure it's like uh for me it's the crown for me that's that's the crown of my life it's probably one of the biggest gmach I have besides making when I finish them tractate inment cuz that's like being an experiential Jude that means the learning part doesn't come as naturally to me so I would say it's just under having a seum is putting on my stral every week every time I look in the mirror and I see myself in the stral you know I'll just catch myself I'll be like wow my whole life flashes before my eyes and I realize what an Incredible Gift this life has been and that hashem's brought me here to have this level of of meaning in my life connection to Hashem and and purpose and it's amazing you know when a when a secular person looks at an orthodox Jew with his hat or his beard or situs or whatever you know they feel somehow inferior in front of you when you just say hello if you just give him a just a tiny bit of love just give him a tiny bit of smile wink you know a little twinkle in your eye when you see them you know they it just raises them up and they feel Jewish the truth is is the secular guy just wants he just wants a hug you know he just wants a handshake he wants a smile he wants a hello know something like that that's all he's looking for and that makes all the difference it's unbelievable I have seen people become balua because someone said Shalo to him and the guy he's Bal Chua his Grand children are going to be observant Jews because someid or some some Yeshiva guy it just said hello that was all he needed to see and then the next thing was the next in his life next thing that happened was someone said hey would you like to come to a class and he his heart was already warmed he felt legitimized as a Jew and he says yeah of course I want to come to a class you know I'm I'm to i t study you know of course you know that's half the battle it's just being nice to the person it's amazing what a difference it makes to be nice to to you know a secular [Music] guy give person a book give person a tape bring people to classes in every major city in North America there's C of organizations where you could bring somebody to a class you know you don't have to do all the teaching or bring them to a seminar websites all the jewi organizations have websites that are educational entertaining and they're powerful and many people get turned on to yish it's very that's very non-threatening giving a person a website sending them an article from a website a link to where they can go to it makes a difference in so many people's lives you know I go back to Rabbi AI Geller who was the rabbi who met me on the bus AI you know I owe you my life oh come on I just met you on a bus said no no you did it man you did it it's all that's a look at my children Kara you know I just made a see him with my 11-year-old son MN chabas AIG that's his he gets all that you know he made the difference you just have to have the desire to reach out you're always meeting people invi nonpr person for a shabas or there's all kinds of organizations that arrange chases or have a on the telephone or learn with somebody once a week talk to someone and so much can be accomplished you have no idea how much can be accomplished foror Solomon built the temple in special prayer Larry I remember when you Larry simple was you know he had me for shabas you know that's it changed my life what happened at his shamas table was absolutely magic and I felt the kadua and we were talking and he was giving over D Torah and I was so moved by that experience that I decided right there at the shabis table I said if this man who's so wise and so special and his reiton who's so kind and giving if they keep shabas it's got to be the right thing so I decided right there I'm going to be I'm going to be sh shabas I'm going to keep shab whatever it means I'm going to keep shabas and in fact I've kept shabas ever since then I was at a lecture and the rabbi walked over to me and said would you like to come over for a shabas would you like to you know and for whatever reason I said sure why not the farthest thing in my mind was becoming Orthodox or or putting a yamak on or or you know learning Torah I didn't even know what Torah was I didn't even it just it was oh great some nice you know home-cooked meal yeah which works wonders the reason he's coming to your house is because he wants to see shoers he wants to see a from family he he's visiting something which he's been told is part of his background but it's totally foreign to him he's not coming to make fun he's not coming to attack he's coming to learn he's coming to experience sit down with your children and say what can we do for them as young as five what can you do for them the five people will say I'll show them where benching is in the bencher OR I'll show them how to wash his hands get everybody involved they're coming to us to find out what we have that shows that what we have is important what we have is precious they want to find out about us I started to go to his house for shoers and I saw something I never saw before when I went to his house I saw how he talked to his kids and how he he dealt with his wife and his family this was a guy who was like me he told me his background he went to college he pulled out a gar and he started learning I'm like I've never saw anything like this before and I was thinking to myself hey I went to Hebrew school I graduated I never saw anything like this before unless you're exposed to a whole other reality you don't recognize that you in an illusion it's like Living in a Dream It's hard to imagine the world of a secular person you can look at it but just the same way that I was a secular person looking at the from world I was looking but I wasn't seeing I was seeing people walking on a Saturday I wasn't seeing the beauty of chabas once I was very depressed I was in a very bad mood and I was working at the cotel and I was crying and I said what am I doing with my life and what's going to happen and I happened to see him walk down he was learning at the time as a bck I happened to see him pass by and when I saw Ritz I said my life is worthwhile I did at least something good in my life [Music] I was born in Manhattan but for most of my young life I grew up in tline New Jersey I was not always this way I used to be uh I would categorize myself as more of a um sort of a beach bum I spent a lot of time at the [Music] beach I also eventually went down to Miami to um actually to go to law school but I chose that location because I thought it'd be a nice Beach town uh area for me to spend a few years [Music] at a certain point when I was in Miami I was actually uh dating a a a Cuban woman she was not Jewish and it was going on for quite a while and at at a certain point I I realized if I were to marry this woman my children wouldn't be Jewish I me I knew that much so I started to um search for some rabbis to speak to to get a little bit of advice on that topic most people who I spoke to just said you can't marry her because she's not Jewish it was pretty much the the standard line without giving me any kind of insight that I that I was looking for and uh finally one Rabbi said to me listen you might want to marry her you might not want to marry her he said why don't you experience Judaism and then you'll have your answer so I decided to take him up on that and I I went and uh went out to find a way to to learn a little bit about Judaism I knew on Miami Beach there was a Yeshiva Rabbi yokan Yeshiva was there and I uh walked in and I told them that I needed to learn a little bit about Judaism and um so they asked me if I was Jewish although I did put on a yamaka for that situation uh to be respectful but they still I guess I didn't have the look and uh I told them I was Jewish and then invited me and they said we have a beginner Kish class every morning at 7:00 a.m. so I saw them the next day the impact was tramatic the the minute I walked in I never saw doing that was meaningful before that where people really believed in what they were [Music] doing I was so impressed that people were doing and they you know they were closing their eyes and they they were really getting into it and that had a very big impact on me just seeing how real it was to them they different types of seekers I guess I I was looking for mems I wanted to I wanted to see I wanted to see if there was a real reason that I needed to carry on in this [Music] tradition I started learning that the world doesn't revolve around me anymore even though in some level we're supposed to think that way I started thinking in much more humble terms after listening to the BAM there I I realized that my you know my decisions do matter I was missing something even though originally I wasn't looking for anything other than how to handle the the situation with the girl I told her that um I wanted my children to be Jewish and I didn't think that uh I could give her any kind of um it wouldn't be fair to continue being with her because I couldn't give her what she was looking for she needed to carry on with her life and find her herself a husband that's a pretty big deal I mean what was that like and was that must have been very difficult yeah it well it was it was very difficult because she was you know quote unquote a good person um but I just started thinking maybe I I have a tradition going back possibly a few thousand years and you know my parent uh my grandparents coming over here you know getting by the Holocaust and and uh you know giving me instilling some sort of uh Jewish identity into me I didn't want to be the one to break that [Music] chain I went to Rabbi zags home for a shabas meal and his son was uh I believe 13 years old and you they I noticed they were very polite they walked us out to you know walked us to the front door and they they' walk you right down the path to the sidewalk and his 13-year-old son walked right down to the sidewalk with me and then he started walking down the sidewalk with me and and just talking to me about life and he was I thought he was a very intelligent 13-year-old kid and then he kept walking and walking and uh a mile later I was at my my front door and he shook my hand and said good job was and walk home and you know to see a 13-year-old boy to to to talk to an adult and walk him you know to talk to a young adult and walk him home and talk about life it just had a very big impact on me I didn't grow up with 13-year-olds like that you know what is this religion about I don't know I'm ignorant I don't know I don't learn gamarra but I see a rabbi son who's 13 years old walking me a mile home to my apartment talking to me in a very intelligent way talking in a very mature way so it's not always about the technical aspects of learning it's you know sometimes it's just seeing how uh how from Jew lives has a huge impact on on a person and that certainly did since I started growing in a spiritual way and and in my ter observance it everything has has changed I have a a wonderful wife and uh just wonderful children a wonderful house and a wonderful community and I realized that these are all gifts that have been given to me because I am uh I'm growing in Torah and I had none of those things PR previously none of [Music] them had I not been able to find an environment that you know a Yeshiva or a rabbi or someone who could give me the answers that I was looking for and I do believe I was looking for them but if I weren't able to find that yeah I might might have been a statistic I was concerned about my kids being Jewish but I had no idea how concerned I should have been my son who who's 4 and a half he's in school and he comes home he knows the story of pesak he knows the story of porm he comes home singing songs he asks me certain questions that I actually can't answer um just sometimes it actually almost makes me want to cry when I when I see that and what I could have potentially passed up it it just would have been a tragedy that I didn't even know about um one day my my son got in the car we picked him up from school and he actually got in the car unsolicited and said and he said to me tati Tor is yummy and just to hear that it it was just it was a beautiful thing [Music] what are you going to say you get upstairs you know ad May you get upstairs and the C BR is going to say like what did you do and you you'll be like well I didn't know the answer to their question and God says they didn't have questions they just wanted a little love wanted you to share your life with them that's all they wanted be part of it even even car make it part of your Consciousness and part of your commitment that you too are going to participate even 10 minutes a week he thank you all his life and they do it they thank you all their lives if my coworker if he had not talk to me if he not invited me to the seminar my life would probably be radically different right now um I probably wouldn't be observing anything much more than the high holidays if that all someone did with me is a tried wasn't persuasive wasn't exciting but they tried they said come down to a class and I went and then Judaism sells itself you don't have a hard product to sell but you have to approach the person there's something like 13 million Jews in the world today so and there's maybe give or take a million Jews that keep Shabbat so each Jew went out and invited 12 people into their home you know one person a month if Lally all the Jewish people would have a chance to experience a true Shabbat and that's all it takes you see somebody they got a ponytail you see somebody they're dressed they not dressed shabas stick on a shabas so what you see a kid that obviously you see he's not on the D so what it's not for us to judge him it's for us to embrace him I mean you know there's so few of us stick together this fellow was walking up the beach and he looked and he saw someone doing something he didn't know what as he got closer he saw that the fellow was picking up starfish and throwing them in the sea so he came up to him and he says what are you doing he says well you see it's low tide now and if I don't get these starfish back into the water they're going to dry up and die so the fellow looks but there are thousands of starfish here do you really think you you know you make a big difference over here with that the fellow reached down picked up another starfish tossed it in the sea he said it made a big difference for that one and I'm one of those starfish this is such a golden opportunity to really change a life to really bring truth to where there's just fiction and that's a gift to be able to do that and so while you're studying and you're raising your own children and you're supporting your family and you may be doing wonderful things to take somebody who's really be they're just like new to the world and to share with them even something small that's a chance to change the world [Music] as she there [Music] I [Music] see hey you [Music] [Applause] [Music] he [Music] Heen [Music] shall [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] a she [Music] [Applause] [Music] you I your [Music]