Impact Through Listening

Hello everyone and welcome to the Oh, you podcast. Hello everyone and welcome to the Ou podcast. Today it's a delight to have with us Rebbitson Dr. Adena Schmid. >> It's a pleasure. >> Who is the founding director of the women's initiative at the Orthodox Union. >> Is that the correct title? >> That is correct. You got it. Okay, good. Thank you so much for being here. >> Thank you for having me. >> It's very very exciting that uh that that you're here with us. And you know the way we start is always with our hardest question. >> Go for go for it. >> Yeah. You ready? Okay. Who are you? >> That is a hard question. I am I direct the women's initiative department. I think that is definitely a large part of my identity. I am also a rebbiton of the lower Marian synagogue. I am the proud mom of four boys, but the Schmidman girls are catching up. Oh, yeah. Because yes, between my daughter-in-law and our two granddaughters, uh, Schmidman boys, watch out. >> Okay, notice has been served. Okay, that's great. So, um, but you didn't start off your life, you weren't born into being the director of the women's initiative, right? There's a little bit of prehistory. >> Okay. >> Right. So let let's let's go back a little bit. Where are you from? >> Where am I from? I was born in Washington Heights, New York. >> Lots of good things in Washington Heights. >> Correct. My father was a SMA student. They lived at 320 Wadssworth. >> Wow. >> And we moved to Q Gardens. I grew up in Q Gardens, New York in Queens. >> Yeah. >> Went to Basakov, Queens. traveled to Brooklyn for high school to CrossFit Park and then went to BJJ with Yakov Rush for seminary and then came back to Queens went to Queens College. I have a bachelor's and master's my masters is in school psych. I have a master's from Azriel at USB University. My PhD is in educational psychology and I have a certificate in educational tech technology from AI. >> So you I was a professional student for a long time. >> You're okay with being in school? >> I love being in school and at the same time that I was in school for myself, I actually taught. So I taught advanced placement psychology for a number of years. I taught in Hank in SKA and in the Manhattan High School. Then we moved to Birmingham, Alabama for nine years. And then when we came back, we now live in Balakinwood, Pennsylvania. Yes, that is how you pronounce it, Balac Kinwood. >> And I taught in the girls high school there as well. I started to teach Na'vi. I like to say that there's a lot of psychology in Na'vi and a lot of Ashkafa and NPsych and did professional development at the school. and then amazingly arrived here at the OU. >> Okay, we're going to talk about that story in a little bit, but I actually wanted you to go back a little further in your history. >> Further, yes, because we're actually very much connected in our history. >> That is really true. >> We're going to maybe I don't know share this. What can you explain to people what absolutely what we're looking at over here? >> For sure. So when my great-grandfather, Reverend Sydney Miller, came to the United States, he came to Forest City, Pennsylvania. >> That's not Forest Hills. >> It is not Forest Hills. It is a dot on the map. Their uh mantra, their slogan is a mile of hospitality. And basically, if you blink, it's over. I I had the opportunity, it was actually very shortly after I started here at the OU to go with my mother to Lithuania with my uncle uh my uncle Ben Lassen and we spent the day in my grandparents in Nisha and we went to Kavna. My great-grandfather was the scamash at Slabatka. He actually came to Yeshua University of Mosha lesson and he was a mashki there. And when we came home and we were driving up to Marasha for Shabas, I said to my husband, if we make a 25minute diversion, we can actually go to Forest City, Pennsylvania, we don't have to travel to Lithuania to find our roots. to which you know the boys in the back were like anyway we did um when I went up to the uh archivist in Far City I think she was a little bit nervous that we were now coming back and reclaiming our roots but anyway so Sydney Miller came to this dot on the map which I I appreciated more having been to Nishut which is also a dot on the map even though they call it Nestut new town in Lithuanian. But so he he came to this uh town and he came to a what I I think was a very dear friend of his. >> Yeah. >> Um maybe related, unclear at this point, but definitely a friend that he knew from the uh and that was your great >> my great-grandfather. >> Your great-grandfather, right? >> That's correct. >> Right. And we have over here some documents that connect them >> at HM Joseph right over here. um that uh that did they were he he was one of the balabatum um and he yeah this is the contract for Reverend Cindy Miller uh signed by HM Joseph in consideration whereof the said first party agrees to pay the said second party the sum of $960 per year payable $80 on the first of each month. And it's interesting, this document that you're holding now is the town's people vouching for his uh >> all of them signed the entire town. >> Yeah. >> The dentist. And uh really just uh just pretty amazing to have this kind of uh >> and this mail was coming to him through your great-grandfather. And I think that's I think that's quite remarkable to know that there's that connection. And I surmise that they knew each other from the old country. And perhaps your great-grandfather who was a storekeeper. >> Yeah. >> In the town, actually brought him because he knew him and they needed somebody who was a coobo, a a moell, a reverend, right? The whole the whole nine yards. He stayed there for a short time and then made his way to Brooklyn where he met my great-grandmother. and always had a uh deep respect for rabbis. Uh he himself went into the shood business. Uh and my grandmother who subsequently married my grandfather Rabbi Dr. A fry wolf was re raised in a home where a rabbi was the like really something that you aspired to be or to be connected with. She said she remembers that they would wait at the bottom of the stairs for the rabbi and revitson to come after Shul and just to say kachavas to them. Halai. Oh [laughter] yeah. >> Well, you sort of followed. >> Absolutely. Absolutely. You also married into an incredible rabbitic family. >> That is true. >> That is of course where all great rabbitic families come from. >> From Montreal. >> Montreal. >> For sure. >> And I knew your husband, Rabbi Aie, Rabbi Abraham Abraham Schmidman. Um, going back when he before he was rabbi, when we were both in elementary school or high school, I don't remember. We were unrivaled teams though, so uh, you know, there was a little bit of that. But of course your father-in-law Allah shalom and my father Allah shalom they were close right they spent a lot of time together they were friends they you know talked and learning and I met your father-in-law many times you I had a lot of friends in the shul big shools all the kids were there um and so >> we go back >> I love it >> in lots of different ways to get to this point okay but I I can't take credit for bringing you to the OU. Somebody else from Montreal reached out to you first. >> Absolutely. It's a very very long story. So I'll present a couple of highlights, but I am uh eternally grateful to Mishbane who was the president of the U at the time. He had met with my husband right when he started his tenure at the OU just to get a feeling of what was going on. State of the Union and he said to my husband, you know, what is your wife up to? What's she doing? And I was at an inflection point in terms of what I wanted to do next. I had always thought of community work, school administration, and handed through my husband my resume to Maish and then radio silence. And I want to give a shout out to Raisy Cetchic who was in the right place at the right time. It was divinely choreographed. She had gone to Mish for Shabas and in March. This happened I gave him the resume in February. So she was at his house for Shabas and he said to her, "Where are you going next? Shabas and she said,"Oh, I'm going to be in Bakinwood in at the lower Maran Synagogue." "Really? Where are you staying? Uh, at the Schmidmans. Oh, the Schmidmans. Do you know Adena Schmid? And Raie and I go way back. Uh, I taught Raisy was the assistant principal when I taught at Manhattan High School. We went to seminary together. We're dear friends. We had a chance meeting when we were 12 years old and we still both remember the conversation. So, we definitely know each other. And Raisie shows up and says, "What's going on with the OU?" I said to her, "I have no idea because I haven't heard a word from them." [laughter and gasps] And she said, "Just stick with it." There was another job that was uh on the table and she said, "Just, you know, hang on because it's really I think that's where you should be." And then nothing radio silence. So Raisy was in Phoenix for Pesak and came walked over to a table and Ita Brandman was sitting at that table and ita said to Raisy, "I'm looking, you know, I'm head of the search committee for this new department that's going to be launched at the OU. Any chance you know anybody who you think could be a good fit in terms of the director?" And Razie said, in >> and so raising >> that the end of radio silence. >> Um yes um you know it took a little bit of you know longer uh you know it's a process but I will say that when I got the email that I >> got the job I shrieked so loudly that my son of Fry thought that somebody died. See we this is a rabbitic home. So when people shriek um you know or you get you read things online things could actually you know anyway >> so I'm so grateful because it's such a unique space and a unique opportunity to be where I am. So I but I do give credit to my who is a very brilliant chess player in terms of organizational leadership. >> Well someday we'll tell my story about how [laughter] I ended up here. >> Okay. I look forward. >> Same similar uh some similar themes. Um okay. So you ended up coming here and they turned to you and said, "Congratulations. You're the director of a program. >> It didn't have a name. >> We didn't we don't know what it's going to be and we don't know what it's going to do." >> And we don't know what it's called. >> Okay. They didn't even know it was going to be with women or they knew. So >> the women they knew. Okay. At least that. [laughter] >> Good. Where do you how do you start? Where do you what do you do to start? What are you looking at a sort of it's exciting you know tabular rasa complete blank canvas >> you're part of the U do you look around and see like uh what other people are doing do you where did you start >> it's a great question firstly remember I was coming from a school >> from teaching >> I remember walking in the first day this is kidish on steroids I can talk to anybody I lot at any time and I can >> So you like kittish? >> I love kittish. >> Good. Okay, so we're on the same page. >> I love kdish. Got it. I love kdish. I'm just moving around, talking to everybody, learning about people, connecting with people. So this was just >> like a a candy store. But it it was very very important to me in starting this department to be listening to take a listening stance rather than coming in and saying I know exactly what the community needs and of course I had a hunch. I mean I had you have to if you're coming into this position but at the same time to project a message a message to the communities I want to hear. I want to hear what you need so that we can address this and we can be partners in this space. At the same time, the OU was very, very excited about launching this department and they wanted buzz. >> We need buzz, buzz, buzz. And they had me sit down with somebody and find out what does buzz mean? And she said to me, "If you're looking for buzz, then you should take out an ad in every Jewish newspaper, get the most controversial women to write the most controversial pieces and you'll get buzz." And she said it with a straight face. and I walked out of her office and really on the spot came up with a mantra that I follow and really leads me uh and it's impact through contribution not commotion because I can make the biggest commotion but I think that is ego driven and it's self-driven and it's not healthy. It's how can I contribute? What are spaces where we can be value add? Where can we do for the community and where can we have an impact? And so the first program that we rolled out was a challenge grant. I had started midyear. So there was budget and we opened up a grant proposal uh an RFP as per proposal and said to the communities you tell us what you need and we're going to select 10 programs and we're going to invest in your communities. We ended up having uh 16 programs which was super exciting. There was tremendous buzz and it was a wonderful opportunity. We had 96 applications which we later on partnered with the research department to research and really drill down on the programs and what were these requests and why did they you know what were they looking for and there was just this incredible dynamic. It was also super strategic. I was one person. How do you roll out? I had somebody who was doing a little bit of part-time work, but I'm only one person and we we need to impact widely and we need to impact wisely. And how do we get that message out? And so this was just a sup, you know, a superb way to get the communities themselves to do the work joyfully. They were super excited. And we've taken some of these programs and actually scaled them. And it's really it was it was a fantastic way to get the message out. In fact, it was really funny because at the time I didn't know exactly how the back end and worked and I thought we figured it out now. >> Yeah, we have. I mean, sort of as much as the back end, [laughter] as much as you can understand, but I I I didn't know how many people I didn't get any I didn't know that if you don't set it up in a certain way, you don't get those applications like they were all sitting in a mailbox. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. So I was >> physical. >> No, no, they were sitting, you know, on, you know, techn Yeah. >> Okay. >> And I I couldn't believe that nobody applied. Nobody was interested. We're giving away, look, it was a nice amount of money. It was $5,000 and nobody. And I still remember going to Miriam Wland and saying to her, you know, I I I can't believe nobody. And she's like, hold on one second. She says there are 30some applications sitting here. I shrieked so loudly that across room and it was really across like all >> your kids again came and >> right there you go. Yeah, I really maybe should think about this shrieking this but it was uh [laughter] anyway so the there was >> maybe people just have to learn that when you shriek it means something good. >> That's right. It's positive. Anyway, it was it was such a fantastic way to move into the community space, build a connection, and really that was I would say we we it was uh just we went on from there. >> Are we still doing any of those projects that you that you started? We just now ran a Tahillim grant to for for shles to program with safer tollim. And also it's it's a wonderful opportunity because it's validating to the communities that receive it. It's not that much money that if a looked then at their application and said like, "Wow, we could actually do this. We don't even need the OU's help if they don't get it." um the ones who do get it are so so excited and again it builds more types of programming that we can look at as models if it's a scaling opportunity so it's I I love the grand space >> now when most people think of the women's initiative there is one signature >> absolutely >> project >> yes >> such that when I was um speaking to a group of madriim at ncsy ko uh this summer and I mentioned my learning na yomi which that was an interesting story about how I started everybody pointed at one young man sitting in the room that's a fry >> fryman >> fryman you know favorite favorite son or >> we don't we don't talk about mayor >> right right our >> he should be safe and protected >> his incredible dedication meanwhile when people think of the women's initiative at the Orthodox Union think of Yomi >> to >> that's what that's that's >> the women's initiative >> and I remember you were having a my first year I had just started uh and happened to be it was in Lawrence and it was on a Sunday and you invited me full invitation I'm not sure if I'm going to go and decided well it's so close I'm gonna go I'm going to show up and I'm going to be supportive >> and I'm sitting there with a full house. Me and Rabbi Hower, I think, were behind the makita >> and my father. Oh, yeah. My husband and >> Ephraim. >> There are a few of us. Yeah. >> And one story after the next. It was just so inspiring and exciting. I don't remember. I think I turned to Raher, but maybe it was Shiman. I I I don't remember. And said, >> I think I'm going to start. and Barashem since that day I've been learning a paric of Na'vi every single day the Messiah and uh we're still we're still going strong. So you're having influence beyond the women of the OU. >> Yeah, there's always men who like to come into the women's section [laughter] [gasps] >> like that day when I was sitting in the women's section. That's right. >> But really, it's been it's been a pretty incredible, you know, straight lineup of people of women learning >> Torah, women learning Nak. >> How many women are are there now who are involved? >> So, in terms of subscribers, there are about 20,000, which is a remarkable remarkable number. In terms of daily participants, probably somewhere around five, six thousand. Everywhere I go, everywhere I go, I was on the New York City subway and a woman looks at me and says, "Are you of course, are you?" Of course, Rabbi Jack Abramoitz, who really gets the a shout out for introducing the concept of Nakyomi, when I repeated the story to him, he says, "I thought I was Nakomi." So I said, "Jack, you're Nahomi. I'll be tardy me." So we're there's enough room for both of us. >> But but I think you have your next swag t-shirt. Are you Nakomi? [laughter] >> Yes. You know. >> So there you go. It's pretty It's pretty amazing. 20,000 registered, five 6,000 learning every day. It's really And it's all ages. >> All ages. >> All stages. International uh and all backgrounds. So you don't have to be learned >> to be part of this. There are women with remarkable Judeaic backgrounds and then there are women with hardly any background. It's just being deliberate. It's being consistent and the the impact is just remarkable. The stories, the warmth, the love. They say, "Hashem, they should bring you Nakas." [snorts] It's just It's so exceptional. >> Another good t-shirt right there. >> There you go. Right. >> The bumper sticker. Yeah. Let's do a couple rapid fire questions. >> Okay. >> All right. You ready? >> Go for it. >> We've been talking about Nakyomi. What's your favorite safer? >> Favorite safer. Okay. So, you know, we want to say this in a reverent way. They're all equal and they're all accepted. >> Rapid fire. Rapid doctor, we [laughter] need an answer. >> An answer. Okay. Um, I had the privile privilege of teaching safer Yahosua. >> What's a must-have dish at your Shabas table? >> Okay, that's not even We can be rapid rapid fire about that. Cranberry crunch. >> How come? >> How come? Um, because everybody likes it. >> Wait, important question. Do you serve it as part of the meal or for dessert? >> Oh, of course part of the meal. It's so exciting to have dessert in the middle of the meal. >> Why not? >> Right. Yeah. >> If you could invite anyone past or present to your Shabas table, who would it be and why? >> I would invite I would invite Rabi Akiba. I I I've always been enamored. every story that you read, everything that you learn about him, his positivity in the face of adversity and always with something just uplifting and wanting to message to the people always >> um it'll be better and it's it's going to be okay and forward march and I just I there's something very just endearing to me. >> It's a great answer. Great answer. What's your best thank you Hashem moment? >> Coming to the U. I open the door to the Oculus and I say thank you Hashem every time. How in the world did I end up here? It's such a gift to be at the OU, to be in Manhattan, to have a 212 number. Okay, that's that's a prize, but it's not just 212. It's 212613. Wow. Uh it's I really feel so so blessed. >> Awesome. Well, we're blessed, too. >> And now we get to be blessed. We get to turn the tables. You get to ask me whatever you'd like. >> So, when you were coming to the U from YU, >> what did you expect? And did those expectations come to fruition? I'm not sure I knew what to expect and I I had all kinds of people telling me different things before I came in. Um, so I was pretty much thoroughly confused, right? If you want to get advice, you go to one, maybe two people. The second you go to three or five or I had 13 different interviews, you get a lot of voices. So, I was sort of just a a mish of not really knowing uh what I was getting myself into. Um, but what I did experience before I before I came in was some really passionate, missiondriven people who just wanted to make things better. And that's not different from Misha University, but whereas with with YU, it's it's really in an educational space, right? Sort of the space that you had been in before you came here. Here it was, okay, what do you want to do? You want to do educational things, great. You want to do advocacy things, great. You want to do support and service of community, great. You want to do Israel, great. And it was just >> a plethora >> overwhelming feeling of drinking from the fire hose. >> That's the candy store. >> And that you call it a candy store. It's a better way of putting it, but that was really um you know, pretty much how I felt. And um it it it's taken about 5 years um for me to not feel as overwhelmed, but just wherever you go, somebody has a new idea or somebody's running in a new direction. And I just I'm I feel blessed to be surrounded by passionate people driving in purposeful ways towards Kadeshu and towards the Jewish people. So to wrap us up, we ask all of our guests to give a braha to the U. A braha to the OU is that on the internal OU side there should be a sense of camaraderie, a sense of partnership, a feeling of working together for Kali Israel. And I would say externally, the community should be able to receive all of the gifts that the OU has to offer because the OU is a remarkable organization that really has touch points at pretty much every every stage, every phase of community life. uh whether it be JYC on campus, whether it be Yahad, whether it be NCSY, whether it be the women's initiative. Who want to know where there's where the men's initiative is? I said it's not my job. I just do the women's initiative synagogue. >> Sounds like we have a new program. [laughter] I really give a braha that the the OU should be welcomed into all these different places uh in the community and and have great success in impacting widely and wisely. >> Amen. And we wish you a braha to continue to have and braha and everything that you do. Blessings from God for all of the incredible growth within the organization and beyond. Keep doing amazing, positive, uplifting, inspiring work. >> Amen. >> Thank you. >> [music]