Transcript
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a person who wants to start observing
Shabbat and stop smoking on Shabbat
though he says I can't I'm not able to I
have to
smoke first of all the rule in such a
situation is to start observing a full
Shabbat except for
smoking if his only difficulty is
smoking he should not drive turn on
lights or use his phone rather he should
start observing a full Shabbat except
for smoking then he should gradually
reduce smoking every Shabbat a little
less than what he is used to until he
eventually achieves full Shabbat
observance but if we would ask a person
who says that he can't stop smoking so
you say that you can't stop on Shabbat
because you smoke every day though on
yum kipur would you ever
smoke usually the response will be in
total shock me on yum kipur God forbid I
don't smoke on yum kipur the big
question is what's the difference
between yum kipur and Shabbat if you
can't do it on Shabbat why can you do it
on yum kipur
but the answer is
simple the human brain operates
according to the importance we attribute
to a specific matter on yum kipur
smoking is not even a topic that is up
for
discussion when yum kipur Begins the
brain is told that until tomorrow
evening no matter what there's no
cigarettes at
all once the brain has received the
instruction that for 24 hours this
subject is not up for discussion
it does not even try to
ask but if on Shabbat a person says to
himself maybe yes maybe no I'm not sure
we'll see what happens if you start
debating then in the end you can fall
but if a person gives a clear
instruction that this urge is not up for
discussion I have made up my mind then
it changes everything the same applies
in all areas like when it comes to
marital Harmony he keeps stumbling he
raises his voice talks irrationally and
then he regrets his behavior here but
the more a person reaches a decision
that no matter what in such and such a
situation I will respond in this and
that way and they Define exactly how
their response will be when he returns
to such a situation again it will be
much easier for him to cope though what
happens in a situation where the person
says I decided but still I
failed so either it means that the
decision was not truly absolute meaning
there was more desire than a firm
decision or at that moment there might
have been a decision
but afterwards there was a weakening and
doubts arose again about whether to
continue or not but when the matter is
absolute it is in the person's hands to
succeed
