How to do Teshuvah - Rabbi Alon Anava

I spoke many times about the topic of chuhwa and and I mentioned that unfortunately there's not enough guidance how to do chuhwa there's a lot of awareness of Chuba a lot of people are doing Chihuahua Hashem in the last 10 20 years they're evaluating evaluating evaluating about a million vowel juwes which is an unbelievable number and we see that all around the world is a movement of outreach from different organizations for different groups from different rabbis and all the corners of the world there's a very strong movement of outreach and especially using the internet and media and so many other ways to reach to as many souls as possible and the outreach is done for Jews to become observant for non-jews that need to convert to convert for non-jews that we need to become Noahide to become no allowed reaches for everybody it's not only for the Jews the world is is is a one entity we're waiting for the redemption and the redemption is for everybody not only for the Jews and the outreach efforts that we do and not only for Jewel's the outreach efforts that we do or for everybody but we see that Boca Shem that in the last 10 20 30 years it's just becoming more and more and more and outreach is becoming very very popular and bo Hashem the result from that is that we have thousands and hundreds of thousands of El Chavez a person who lived their life in a secular way does it matter to what degree when they're completely secular whether reform whether conservative whether doesn't really matter I don't like all these definitions the Jew is a Jew but they live the life away from Turin beats vote and then they change their way same thing with no IDEs and same thing with : converts the problem is is that there's a very big factory so to say of Bell Chavez but then there's nobody to follow up and there's no egg guidance once you you became religious okay here I'm religious have a black suit now what so some are very lucky and they have the opportunity in the garage Eva young man some ladies are very lucky and the young and they go to seminary my wife for example became about Juba in a later age in her life so she didn't go to seminary she was in a seminary for months and that's not enough how can you live your life like a religious person oh and with a month training so very few people are lucky and they get to go to seminary if there were lay a girl and your she waived her a boy but all happens to the men when they're older they can go to yeshiva or woman when she is 40 or 50 or 60 she that can't go to seminary so regardless to that that's one of the one of the many reasons why we opened this Institute for the women because women don't have where to go and moving need to be educated and taught but regardless to that there are thousands of people who become religious and nobody follows up with them I mean ok some of them are a little bit more serious so they'll go to more classes they'll call the rabbi 50 times a day and that but they need some type of guidance and I feel it on myself because I do already outreach for over 10 years ho ho Shem Shem gave me the merit is good to reach to hundreds of thousands of people and I see the volume of emails and calls that we're getting with basic questions that the guidance it's not necessarily questions in Halawa its guidance and and to approach it to go to a point that now i get on an average day about fifteen hundred emails a thousands of fifteen hundred emails about so that's what we get about every day we have of now seven girls that just go and they process emails and they filter the emails until the email gets to me that also takes a long time and i suspend to three hours a day answer close to 100 emails every day just questions and phone calls half my day is just replying to people whether it's on the phone whether it's on the an email whether it's a chat doesn't matter what it is but I say first of all it's growing and growing because you know when you they say when you bring the the camel to the well till you bring them to the well that's not an easy job but once is there these Thursdays drinking and drinking and so you wake somebody up and then they're like okay now I have 528 questions who's gonna answer them so I can only sit on myself I'm sure it's a lot of other rabbis and organizations and groups and congregations have the same thing that you wake people up and now now what and bow Hashem I travel around the role and I lecture and I speak and we work a lot online and in all sorts of types of media so yeah you poke Souls you wake them up but now they come back and okay how do i what do I need to do choose me yeah there is on my website a place where you can submit a question and Moho sham we're working with the advanced media and technology that now now which try to saving time and yeah if you will send now to any of my websites or any of my social network platforms and the question you'll get right away an answer go to that page and submit your question and and it's built in such a way that you can actually go to that page and search for the same question that you already asked because we get sometimes the same question 150 times so this there's a bow motion there's a lot of websites as the rabbi is not my website but there's ask Moses and ask the rabbi and there's many many websites and and I know they're also caving under the pressure because because there's thousands of people that they have questions and in the in the system what we built on my website you can go and you can hit keywords and it will shoot all the questions that are similar to your question so that way we're trying to save the questions to be repeated I have a place that I have a place on my websites that you can see answers that are in audio answers that are in videos answers that are text but the point is that that you just threw me a huge responsibility that I'm responsible but but the point is that the follow-up is more important than than the than the actual first initiative it's almost like in any any type of medicine you go first time to the doctor he gives you whatever perspex in or whatever treatment to do then you have to come back for a follow-up to see how it's working so the follow-up is the hard parts to wake up the people that's one thing to follow up that's a very hard thing because really there's no guidance out there there's there's the only guidance is if you really go to yeshiva and even when you go to yeshiva I mean I have the school to go to many years to yeshiva and even initially you don't get much guidance and usually you learn Torah there's not much of guidance for the bow Shuba because about rumors about sugar for the rest of his life even if he's now sugar for 40 years when I'm saying about sugar it's for me I'm considering conferences about sugar because it's a it's a new book it's a new point in your life anyways robot Ruben but what I'm saying the word well sugar Boko sham we have hundreds of convert students I'm referring to the convert stool because a convert for me is like about shuva that he got to a pole he she got to a point in their life they changed their life now what and then you of course you become about you were the reason why I'm saying bal Java is because you carry with you the baggage that you've produced for the look for the last 3040 years so now here comes a very big terminology a very big term that we have to first of all understand because there's a bow chuhwa and there's a hose Alba Java was their maturity Hosea means to return now the difference between the hosel Petrova and the BAL Java these are two terms in Hebrew oh there in Hebrews to return what does it mean to return that I was once a thief and then I decided that I don't want to steal anymore so I stopped stealing and then a month later my Yetzirah saw something shining in a store and I could not hold my etc and I stole it so I went back to stage one because now I'm back a thief and then I did sugar again and then for two three months I was able not to steal anymore I'm not talking about myself by the way I'm just giving an example don't don't add to my record and then again and I'm going backwards I'm giving an example with sealing it can be with anything it can be in anything and any any type of sin is that I do the sin that I repent a to three months past sometimes it's two three days but then I go back again to the sin as long as I go back again to the same I'm considered the hosel basura I'm a yo-yo one time here one time here one time back into Chuba one time I fail one time I fall one time I fail I do chu man backwards and Fulton yo-yo for the rest of my life and that's a big part of the Chi well the point is that most people when they reach to that point then that's where they start falling into despair because when you take off is like a like an airplane taking off that's when you start becoming a Chua first you on the runway you warming up your engines you get excited and then you start accelerating and that plane accelerates and accelerates and then after running on the runway for 2-3 minutes and accelerating through an unbelievable speed then it takes off and then it takes off for half an hour it takes off and and in descending and ascending and ascending and finally after half an hour it reached the altitude and then it levels and then for 12 hours you're flying on the same altitude the engines are low and then every now and then you go into these pockets air pockets this is kind of the analogy of the bell Java in the beginning you're very excited you're on the runway then you take off so you have a good year or two that you really you you have full perforce they they're collage but who really removes the etc and he says let them let him get to his altitude then go back to him and then once you reach your altitude then starts all this turbulence up and down and up and down and that's where most people start falling into their to despair some of them fall completely off and then it starts all this battle and this is the problem this is the point where a person is start seeking now now what now so up until this point when you're constantly going backwards and forwards and backwards and forth you are considered a hotel bachelor house ever means to return which means that every time I'm returning to stage one and backwards and forth and backwards and forth Val chuba Val comes from the word in Hebrew Berlin which means owner if I own my home I'm the bear Lima of the home I'm the owner of my home I don't have to pay rent it's my home same way with the bow Chava if I already conquered my my my sin I know I'm not doing it anymore and I'm never doing it anymore that's the real battle Juba then I'm considered about you because I'm the owner of the Chuba and I'm never doing it again so for example in my personal life I would say that let's say 50% of the sins that I used to do as a secular man I'm about to bow because I'm never I never did it ever again and I'm never doing it again and they're totally out of the picture and then let's say another 50% are bouncing Kozel Bakula so and I'm saying well myself as a bow Chava myself so to call myself about you wow that's a very high level so certain things for example it's it's forbidden for man to be with a woman that is not his wife so in that scene I can say okay I'm about sure ah that's it I married Boca shame I'm not going to parties I'm not say hanging out on the beach like I used to that's it this part this department is over lock the keys threw it to the garbage that's it I'm about you out here now we are the departments I don't know I'm still swinging backwards and forwards and backwards and forth so these are the two definitions between bow Chava and Hosea Petula and based on the sham we will do every Tuesday that's going to be our settle that the first class on Tuesday is going to be about sugar because Juba that's gonna take us five years of classes because there's so much information what we need to absorb and start bringing it down to actions it's not just you know putting on a black suit and growing a beard on your case putting a dress and that's it I'm good to go that's where it starts so that's why I mentioned in the class before that when I became religious for two years I refused to have the costume I was in yeshiva I did not have beard I did not wear a suit I did not go with the hat I did not have anything that had to do with a custom I refused to be dressed like a religious man because I was like because if I would dress if I put the costume it's the easiest part to put the costume I call it a costume even though there's a lot of mystical reasons and there's a lot of value to how we dress this is not stamp somebody said hey let's wear black suits that's not why we do that there's a very deep reason for our dress for our dress code but in the beginning I said if I'm going to put on my dress my costume so to say what's concrete sonio the external part then what's going to be with the premiere what's gonna be with the internal part I'm gonna work on the external part to impress everybody around me look how religious I am but what's gonna be with the inside and then the inside will be neglected and then what's gonna happen five years down the line when the outside is gonna be very rugged what's the inside is started going to start being being very very weak so you constantly want to work from the inside and you want to work from the inside outwards if my chula inside is real doesn't matter how I dress doesn't matter if I if I wear a certain thing or if I behave a certain way it's the inside and the real truth is the inside not the outside the the the mass seem the actions are very important but the real true VAR the tuning from inside that's my fight for the rest of my life and if I was a liar then it will take me 40 years to fine-tune the the the problem of lying and it will start slowly slowly we reduced from being a pathological liar that everything is a lie to hear a lie and they're aligned slowly slowly from a big lie to small lies and and I I mean lie lies a lie a lot of people tell me okay it's a white lie or I just didn't say the truth a lie is a lie doesn't matter how you how you coat it and a lie doesn't matter how you gonna try to to justify the lie it's the same lying is a sin so I'm just giving one example and many because lying is something that very big majority of people are dealing with it because they think in their mind that a small lie is not a lie it's okay small is fine the reality is that in sham I mean there's no such a thing is 90 percent truth it's true this is there's no 99.9 percent this is a hundred percent truth and whatever is not a hundred percent is not true that's it and if you lie then you lie to yourself eventually in United economical you want to lie to me or to anybody else it's mic work for certain while the only problem with lying is that lie has generations you can say one lie you say the first line and the second one has to be already prepared to back up the first lie that lie just starts producing generations you can finish it with one lie because then you don't remember what did I tell him what did I tell her you see the person on the street I remember what I told him so and then you have to start producing more lies to back up the first slide so this is one example out of many I mean I'm talking about lying I mean there's many other things in our chuhwa whether it's jealousy whether it's i nevah whether it's whether it's many other problems then it's not necessarily me separating the meat and dairy of me and not doing a certain thing that's one thing that's one department out of many departments in my Chuba so unfortunately in many many places whether it's country cities congregations I grew up with for certain in a certain town in Israel you grow up with with all sorts of ideas and all sorts of theories and all sorts of very habits and 50% of these theories and habits and ideas are crooked they're not by they're not parallel to the Torah so doing Java is not only me you know putting filling in the morning or separating my meat and dairy or preparing for Shabbat or learning about the laws of Shabbat so I can observe the Shabbat sometimes is correcting a certain chain of thoughts that's a turn ideology of something that is completely against the Torah now I grew up in a very secular town in Israel I grew up with some type of a brainwashing system that it took years to start removing it from the system so and and if you go now to one of these cities they're good people very nice people they're very friendly to each other and they're good citizens and many good things not saying they're mean people but with a very crooked way of thinking now start removing that from your system getting rid from the system so the chuhwa again is not only actions shoe wise in my entire day but so get it mashallah the path of my thought because my path of thought has to be parallel to the Torah and if it's not parallel to the Torah then I have a problem so my entire Chuba is including many many many different categories or aspects so everyone look at it it's really you got to start cleaning the mess out now since we're going to talk a lot about Java and many different things today I want to talk about one thing that I call it the the babushka chuva you know it's a babushka you know those dolls that you open one and inside there's another one and then you open the other one has another one in it and then you open until you come to this little little church carry this little okay this is a babushka so I mean I maybe I'm pronouncing it wrong I hope I hope that the Russians are not gonna get upset at me we had not too long ago a few women came and stayed by us from the Ukraine and that's the prison they got us my kid got so excited cuz they got like this this funny-looking doll that Yuki there's more and more and waianae every time I said that she kept correcting me that I'm saying it wrong so I might pronouncing in the wrong way but I think it's called babushka maybe pop pushka I don't remember but the point is that we are this babushka and inside of us there's many many levels there's many many grades so to say I don't know if grade is the right translation and he would scold mother Riga a step a level and bizarre ashamed after this class we're going to learn we're gonna start learning about our giggling the gates of reincarnation and the first thing that we're talking about gates of reincarnations are the levels of the soul which in essence we have five levels of our soul hyah hyah hyah hyah neshama woken a fish we spoke last week in the class about the soul that we actually have 125 levels of our soul and we're going to learn that very soon in the gates of reincarnation but my soul is built from levels now the levels is not like steps rather if you take now you see these cups that we make the coffee with you look over there there's a pile of them then in essence it looks like one long cup but one cup in another cup in another cup in another cup in another cup and so forth that's what it means the levels of our soul then one goes inside the other and if you're looking at that pile of cups it's the same diameter doesn't change its diameter it's just one is dressed inside the other and you can build now five meter tower of cups this is how the souls get dressed in each other so to say notice all the levels of the soul exactly diameter is fear Allah so this this is why I call this this tuba part of the babushka because in me I have so many layers of the me and in essence what is me when you ask a big question what is me my body my clothes my my what is me me is - Shama by the inner part in me that's my spiritual parts but again we're gonna talk very soon inshallah legally my but what's this essence because me if I'm asking me what's what's a me in the in Hebrew it's called Ragesh reddish is is a feeling because I'm full of feelings inside of me if you ask what is really me is what I feel inside excitements happiness sadness depression all the feelings that I have inside me and I don't know if I'm translating it right and it was called a reddish and I guess is something that you can feel something that you can actually you can touch it because you can touch sadness and you can touch a penis and it cannot touch excitement but you feel it and you if I'm gonna ask you today how are you today you tell me today I'm very happy how do you know I feel it today I'm very sad how do you know I feel it I can feel what you feeling you can be sad now you can be tired you can be excited I cannot feel it and I will never feel it then you can never give over to me or you're feeling with something we cannot share with each other so that's kind of defining what's the me is my feelings but that's another lavash another garment to the original to the main to the essence of what I am which is my soul the body's just address to the soul so bedtime when I do Chua I have to reveal the me the real me not the external parts that's why I say when I grew up I grew up in a CERN ideology a certain way of thinking as a certain pattern of life it's you have to start peeling it to reveal the real me because it's for me it was normal 30 years ago to to hate a group of people I grew up hating religious people that's how I grew up I was brainwashed to hate anyone with a beard and a black suit we have to hate them because they're coming to to milk the country from its money and I go and risk my life in the army and they don't and they sit all day long and learn and they get money all these theories which are completely wrong by the way but what the propaganda you have in Israel against the religious people that maybe 2% of it is actually right 90% 98% of it is not even right but that's where I grew up now start peeling it off because it's not necessarily the hate towards the religious group it's the fact that I can tolerate that the option of hating even another person that I don't know to a point that I always give an example one time I went on a bus and I sat next to a man and I just sat next to him and he went like that I'm not joking and I was like what's wrong and he sits like this the whole way okay you want to sit like this good I have more space and then he tells me some he was really dude you're all the same like mumbles that I'm like what he tells me you're all the same tell me do you know me do you know who are ya how do you tell me you're all the same you came and you made a research in my neighborhood you know that we're all the same how do you know what you have specialized that you can see the only one you know maybe maybe if you would remove this screen of hate maybe we can be best friends maybe I can teach you something why do you think we're all the same so right away he threw some comment about that something out of the army I told him without knowing you I guarantee to you then I was more a soldier than you and when you were a little kid running on the on the playground with your ball I was in Lebanon fighting so don't throw to me the army job don't look just look at this and think that because I have a beard that I I to the army and it only I guaranteed to you that was a more of a soldier than you and I'm not totally telling you you're all the same and nobody you know me maybe I'm the one the reconstitution of new car I have a car accident I'm gonna be the one who pulls you out of the car and with this said CPR on you how do you know why tell me you all the same what kind of a distorted way to look at another human being but unfortunately I can relate with him because that's how I grew up now it's not hating the group itself is the fact that I have hate towards somebody else for no reason and we spoke about it on Sunday this concept of sin acronym evading another person I don't know him I don't know anything about him and I'm able to hate him because I don't know I don't even know because he's dressed a certain way that's how distorted that sometimes is the way that were brought up and I'm giving one example out of five million you try to amuse your imagination of different examples but chuhwa like I said before it's not just the actual rituals it's starting to get rid of layers and these layers are like this babushka first the first I have to do you know if you notice the big babushkas you know there were little details on them and when you go to the small one it's soaked small there's not a lot of details on them the big ones they have beautiful patterns and colors and why because there's a lot of space which means that the more then I'm pumped up with my ego the more I'm concerned and concentrating on the hits annuit of the external part there's a lot of space and the space will attract anything negative possible and I have to slowly slowly not only peel my external layers by peeling my external layers I'm already diminishing myself and diminishing myself and diminishing myself to a point that the XM the essence is small and it cannot be broken anymore my little girl when she got to the little one she was trying to open it I told her that's it that's the last stage this one doesn't open she was like but all the other ones were opened how come this one doesn't open so that's it you go through essence the essence cannot be broken that is the essence and then of course she puts it in and you build it back up so we are in essentially a babushka and I have to start not only peeling my external layers every layer that I feel I have to diminish myself diminish myself and I'm not talking to make my selfish matter to make myself a slave to somebody talking about humbling myself making myself a little bit less of an existence diminishing my ego diminishing my my presence around many other people so this is a very important part of my Chua and just on that we're gonna have to go many different classes but the point is to start understanding the concept that my Chava is not only about opening the book or coming to a class so I know if I'm allowed to make coffee on Shabbat so how to make my tea on Shabbat or what I'm allowed to what I'm not allowed to and all these reasons sometimes people are so fanatic about the nitty-gritty and also two little details which is good I like fanatic but they're so fanatic about them it's vote in the Torah when it comes to the Rif self refinement there's no work there at all and then what happens is it you have the result of a very religious human being that is like fanatic that if you move something the wrong way on Shabbat World War three but when it comes to something basic what's called been atomic of it all then there's nothing there because the person is not resigned at all what happened here is there was a lot of work in the kitchen I owed a lot of work in the external part it's all new to the external there was a little work outside in the mid spot in the Torah but there wasn't removed remove all of these layers to a point that I'm really getting in touch with my essence with myself for me to do chuhwa and we're going to learn that very soon in bascially Ghulam the whole concept of the reincarnation not to torture me people think reincarnation is a punishment it's not it's a complete opposite from a punishment the guy Maitreya the numerical value of the word go is the same numerical value go there were Crescent people think that Gil Ghul that a reincarnation is a punishment o is probably in a previous life you did such-and-such and now you're getting your punishment the kind of nonsense is that sometimes people see a certain situation and they say oh this happened to him because in a previous life he did this and that what are you the result can you know what happened to somebody in a previous life people they see a child that is mentally or physically challenged or in the previous life he did this and that hot space that hood how can somebody come in there to say oh that happened because of that nobody nobody there are few people in our history maybe five that were able to look at a human being and know exactly everything about it and I mentioned that result because he was one of the only ones who was able to look at a human being and always google him and all his press life's about shem tov had the same level or a few that we know of I'm sure there was a few that we don't know what the point is that we don't know what happened in a previous life and our giggle a reincarnation is not a punishment it rather it's to refine me I'm removing another layer and another layer and every reincarnation that I come back I remove a layer so that's a whole different thing and and and just because the comment is smart because some part of the giggle there is some type of a concept of tikkun and and and and i will use a bold word as punishment but the essence of the giggle is there is the refinement is what's called zico circulars rahul is the quartet israel what does it mean less the coatless okay there's a chord the translation is to give merits but really is the psychological zakat it Israel let's say ho time to make them pure if you're talking about him talking so that's why he gave them a lot of Torah meters so we can work on ourselves this is what's called Z cool so I call it the babushka because you start peeling layers another layer and another layer and I and I in my path of Java everyday I remove another layer and I had a real serious problem with anger when I was before was religious I mentioned that in one of the classes I used to break the windows all the time then just removing this it doesn't come overnight so from becoming a complete hothead and then it starts slowly slowly and then it happens once a week and then once a month and once a year but there is still that nuclear power deep down in the neshamah that all it needs to be poked one time and it goes berserk and it's not only me I mean other people have problems with anger and to work on your anger that's alive a lifetime that's chua-chua is not the black suit black suit is nice to get rid of my anger the Torah says viata a llama kielbasa BR da bu is to not only to get rid is what we do non pizza bo is to burn it to completely and knowledge what does it mean to burn to burn it to - to make it not exist anymore let's be cool so when Tosh's Bianca haha me kill America the old Abed inside of me Mike Shula is coming from inside if I'm gonna do chuhwa from inside the outside is gonna be it's gonna follow through and that's why I refused in the first two and a half years in yeshiva to be dressed like a religious person because I said that's not gonna signify my religion my mokuba my two eyes if I really work from inside and then I will be proud to wear this black suit and then I'll be proud to put a hat and to have the costume so the point we want to take from this class is that we have to concentrate on the layers that we have to remove and we have to understand that we have to have a lot of patience this is not coming in a month and order half a year or a year that can be years years of years of hard work that I'm removing a layer and removing learn as you're removing the layer you don't notice how much you're removing the same analogy like an onion start peeling now an onion you're going to go around like this 40 times down is not gonna change much because every layer of the onion is a microscopic it's a micro millimeter so how many layers you have to remove for finally the onion to be to be a peeled but if you very detailed you're going around and around it slowly slowly no microscopic way you'll see that the onion is shrinking and drinking and shrinking it's inevitable there you can't it's it's not going to stay the same size that's the exact same with my chewy if I'm concentrating on what's going on in now I'm not gonna see the change but if I'm going to look now in a you're touching enzyme and I'm gonna look back to the year you're tough seen some assign 10 years back Wow then you see the distance you don't see it from here to two months ago and the thing is that that's the main problem of about you are is that at some point you feel you giving it all you have and you're saying I'm walking on one spot nothing is changing and that's where people fall into despair because that's the that's what they excel at I will present you it's not gonna present your the success is that I was gonna tell you you're walking on the spot you're not doing anything nothing is moving so the point to take from this show is that we have to concentrate on how am i refining myself to reach to the core essence of - Shama because that's the real me and to reveal the real me because the real me is possessing unbelievable Wellsprings of an abundance of and of everything of wealth and happiness and success and everything is hidden in the neshamah my point is about you up or sale but you are we want to define it is to reach to the essence because that's my iodine in this world and I need one department I need to consider an alternate vote because I have to do that and the other department has to work on my on my refinement of character and the other department I have to work on myself another department with me in another person it's it depending on many different things so bizarre the shame we will continue to have many more classes about the topic for today at least what you need to take for today is you have to have a daily workout that you that you exactly like you would work out your body on a treadmill is a daily concentration a daily meditation where you're saying what layer am I feeling today I have to feel some type of a layer and today I'm concentrating on something and bizarre - am the Kailash MA who guides you which layer you have to work on today so if you're going to wake up in a very bad mood today you have to work on your patience for your anger and if you wake up and the first thing in the morning you open your phone and there's a knowing message from somebody then you have to work on your judgments how you're judging that person just sent you this annoying message and every day a collage boo-boo hints to you we think that it's just the motion of the world collage book was very kind and it says today I'm gonna make you work on your patience everybody's gonna know you today and today I'm gonna make you work on this and today I'm gonna make you work on that and you have to have in your mind the the awareness and the clarity what is the boredom what is my job today when I wake up in the morning and I say my dear me the next thing that I should say I don't know we're sages is not say it is they should Adeline what is my job today what's my job because a shame sends us this the job description of the day whether it's coming by email by fax by what's up by wherever you want it the shrim sends you that task for the day you just have to recognize it you just have to see what is what am I have to do today and every day that I do something I am working on my Chuba and the point is that my being and my concentration is Chuba because I have to refine myself in such a way that I don't want to reach the end of my life and I didn't complete my chore and I'm gonna really have to come back again in a giggle to complete so the point is that every day I have to work on something and I have to really meditate on the fact that there's millions of layers and every layer that I remove then it has to come with also a little bit of a little bit more chef Ruth what's called being a more humble and the more I am building myself the more I make myself small the less details so to say can be registered meaning that I have to deal with much less things because a much more humble and the more humble I am then I'm gonna fight with less people I'm gonna hate less people I'm gonna argue with less people I'm gonna have issues with those people because if I have 100 arguments a day then and I'm humbling myself and by default I'm removing it to 90 arguments a day because I know where to move back when to say I'm sorry when to shut up when to move away so Basava shared machine will guide us to to have the right tools and guidance we will continue every Tuesday first class our guidance of how to really do chew up and behzod a shame I'm sure that a shame will help us to really concentrate on what we need to and the point to take that is the most important that in order to do chi-wai you really have to have guidance and a lot of people don't realize that you have to have a personal trainer you want to lose weight you go to a dietician you wanna be a good athlete you have a trainer anything you want to do you want to be good in business you need you need a mentor you must have a mentor you can call it everyone's you can call it a rabbi you can call it the Rebbetzin you can call them a sphere a multi-car whatever definition you want you can call it but the point is that you need somebody that mentors you because our sages say NSO Matty let's mama better swim a prisoner cannot let himself out of his own cell I need if I'm drowning customers your own I can put my hand as much as I want out if somebody is not gonna be out there to pull me out my hand is worthless so I need somebody constantly to pull me up I need a personal trainer a real personal trainer that guides me in my Chuba that can come and tell me listen this is doing wrong and this is doing good and put the dump don't put so much attention on this put more attention on that don't consume it on nonsense concentrate on that unfortunately a lot of people they they still have some type of an esteem that if cars fish along somebody tells them you're not doing something good they instead of taking that as true as positive criticism they take it as criticism and I don't want to talk to him right now I have a lot of students if they start swell and then I tell them this you don't doing good no you always tell me bad things like you wanted me to help you what do you want me to point on the good things I have to point the bad things you're going to the doctor what you want the doctor to tell you all your organs are good I'm not telling you that that organ is bad you don't get upset at the doctor when he comes and tells you listen you have a problem here what are you expecting the doctor to tell you listen your brain works well your eyes are very good your back is perfect though yeah but but I came because I have pain oh you expect the doctor to tell you this is your problem so you come to your mentor your mentor will tell you I'm sorry to tell you you're very stingy you are very angry you're very whatever hard to deal with so that's where I need to humble myself if I humble myself I can actually let all these mirrors that are in front of me actually reflect on me my wife is a mirror my husband is a mirror my kids are a mirror everybody around me are mirrors to show me where I'm holding and if I just remove every day one layer and another layer and another layer of my ego of my babushka then I can start actually receiving from each individual in my life what I need to work on so if I have a very knowing boss it means that I have to work on my patience sometimes the boss that is annoying should say thank you that I have a job even and whatever it is so the point is that I have to constantly be aware of what's going on around me and to concentrate on every day what I need to peel what layer I have to work on and my main goal is to reach to my inner essence that's what I need to reveal my might might eat my meat and that can only be good as our there's nothing bad in the neshamah so whatever we will be revealed from it will be my kindness and my compassion and my love and mine standing and I can kill just on myself that when I grew up I wasn't a nice guy and it was almost impossible to think what I can actually tolerate another person or being nice to another person people now that see me after 20 years they don't believe that it's me because I was like the bully of the class I was the most disgusting night making fun of everybody bullying everybody pushing everybody making jokes every that's how I was but you know when you really remove all the layers all this junk you find that inside there's actually something much much nicer as much as good as you think you are you are a hundred times better you are more kind that you think you are more courteous that you think you're more charitable than you think why there's just too many layers because we're all good neshama is is that is the essence of good and it just wants good it just needs to be revealed my work my work for today and for the rest of the week and become is this babushka just peeling layers constantly peeling layers till I find my essence what's called the Guillory all and soft because I have a piece in me that is a piece of oh and soft we're going to learn now Bashar illegally my one a glue it what's called the FG - ebony fish the highest level of minor fish that's what I want to reveal and when I will reveal that my true essence will be revealed and that's when I really gonna complete my Chuba that's called a bow Chava that I conquered everything and now I can get the title of about Chava there's our the shame we work on that every step that we do just will hastened the ultimate guru up as other Shama should still very soon and each and every one of us should have very big success in a path of to our [Music]