How P*rn is DESTROYING Men (And What To Do About It)

[Music] Let's talk about pornography. You tell me, how can you give to pixels on a screen? So, I feel like I've spoken about this many times in various uh capacities about the damage of pornography specifically on men, but uh people are asking, so I'll elaborate a little bit more here. The damage on men specifically damages men and women. And the damage for women is both women who consume pornography as well as women who are in relationships with men who are the consumers of pornography. So, but I don't want to talk about that right now. Right now, I just want to speak about how pornography damages men who consume pornography. So, a little bit of background and I've spoken about this in a lot of my videos. Anytime I speak about marriage, I speak about this concept about what is masculinity and femininity like what is it really? Because masculinity and femininity is not just the biological definitions. That's the lowest level manifestation of it. Things in the physical world uh derive from from spiritual archetypes. Masculinity and femininity in in spiritual archetypes are provider and recipient. And I've spoken about this at length at length in many other places. I'm not going to go into a super uh detailed description of it. But basically it's like this provider recipient means a classic example is like a teacher student the teacher is providing you know the student doesn't know the teacher does know teacher teaches student listens but what happens you know like it says uh in the Talmud that I've learned much from my teachers even more from my peers but from my students I've learned most of all that the most enrichment that a teacher can gain is actually from a student because a student challenges you brings out ins sight that you would never have had on your own. Um, and then ultimately we'll say back to you what you said, but in ways you're like, "Did I say that? Really? I didn't even think of that." So giver and recipient, provider recipient really is where the first move, the provider, the initiator put something out there, but it's really just raw materials because what the recipient ends up doing is giving it back, mirroring it back, but in not just bouncing it back like ping pong, but upgrading it and then giving it back. Now I said these paradigms also are are in the biological realm. So let's talk about it in in terms of um the most physical uh and obvious example uh reproduction. So the male provides this tiny little packet of of genetic code. So he's the provider. The woman develops that upgrades it infinitely because what she gives back nine months later is infinitely greater than what she received at the conception. So that's the paradigm provider recipient. Now I've spoken about this in other videos you know I say that when it comes to male female relationships when it comes to marriage like to understand that emotional energy emotional energy uh has to follow these laws meaning to say in a relationship between a man and a woman where the woman has to initiate the emotional energy it's going to crash and burn. The man has to be the one who brings it. He comes through the door and he gives her attention first before anything else and he fills her up and and then when she is filled up, she becomes literally pregnant with that energy and then gives birth to enough energy to fill the home. He can't fill the home. A man cannot fill a home with energy. Um but he can fill his wife with energy. She can turn around and fill the home with energy. Okay? Like I said, I don't want to get into a super detailed explanation of these dynamics because I speak about it at length in other places. But now that you understand the basics, masculine and feminine is provider and recipient. But the recipient is not passive. The recipient turns around and actually becomes a provider. All right? Which is why the ultimate satisfaction that a man can have is what he gets back from his wife after having given it to her selflessly. He gets back in upgraded form that which he gave to her. Okay. Sexuality is no exception to this. The curse of uh dysfunctional sexuality is that it is based on a premise that a man receives sexual pleasure from a woman. That he's getting something from her or you know in the worst case scenario taking something from her whether by force or by uh you know manipulation. God forbid in the worst case scenario, but even in the best case scenario, she's doing him a favor. She's giving him something. Um, and do you understand why that is doomed to failure? Do you understand why it defies the spiritual laws? It goes against the grain of reality. There can be no productive male female relationship where the male is taking something from the female that the male didn't first implant within her. So here's let me just spell it out. In healthy marriages, the sexual eb and flow is that a man gives to his wife, he gives to her. Um, you know, they say I try to watch my language on this channel because a lot of I know I know for a fact people have told me like children I guess sort of intelligent children but uh watch this channel and uh look if if your kids are on YouTube they're seeing far worse than Chase Tao talking about uh marital intimacy. But at any rate let me just try to say this in a clean way. The definition of foreplay begins way before the bedroom is within your eyesight. Okay? A man comes home and he gives attention to his wife. He's giving to her. He's giving to her. This creates a desire in her, a hunger. Once she has a desire, she wants something. She wants something from him. Now he gives her that intimacy. He doesn't take it. It's not a prize. It's not a it's it's it's not he's a hunter out for his prey. It's that he gave to her. He he aroused within her a desire to receive and then he gave her more. And that's the most satisfying for both of them. He's a total giver and by giving he ends up receiving the most pleasure because the greatest satisfaction a man can have is that he's being a selfless giver. So here's the thing. Let's talk about pornography. You tell me how can you give to pixels on a screen? What can you do as a man that is generous, magnanimous, giving with pixels on a screen? There's nothing you can do other than take from it. It's a totally one-sided relationship. So, what's happening? You're becoming a taker. And you're becoming a taker specifically in the area of sexuality which sexuality is all about male female differences like my French friends say viva difference long live the difference between male and female I know that's anathema in today's society but yes the difference between male and female which are existential differences not just biological differences but existential differences spiritual differences. So when a man defies that by being a taker specifically in the area of sexuality where his masculinity is supposed to be most pronounced, he is going to suffer. He's going to suffer. And there's no way you can have a giving relationship with pornography. You're going to say, "Oh, you pay for the pornograph." Okay? That's not called giving. That's that's called a a transaction. The the buyer gives money to get something. It's called taking. Just like uh I said before, sometimes a man takes a woman's uh physical uh intimacy. It's not intimacy, it's the opposite of intimacy, but he takes physical contact with her through uh coercion, some sometimes through manipulation. Okay? So, sometimes through uh commerce, through a transaction, right? But the point is he's taking he's the taker. And it's never going to be healthy and it's never going to be satisfying. And the biggest proof that it's never going to be satisfying is he he he he wants more right away because it doesn't fill him. It's like you just finished eating a meal and you're still hungry. So that's what makes it so destructive. Now, we're not even done. We're not even done because let's play this forward. Let's say this man is married or has a relationship with a woman. You think all of a sudden he's going to stop being a taker when he's with her? No. Of course not. The pornography has trained him to be a taker. He's going to carry that into his intimate life with his with his partner. And he's going to objectify her, turn her into pixels on a screen, meaning just a source of physical pleasure that he can take from. And let's set aside how demeaning that is to her. Because I don't even want to talk about how destructive this is to a woman to be in that type of a dehumanizing situation. Like that's for another we'll make another class just about that. How this dehumanizes and destroys women. But let's just talk to men. As a man, do you understand when you're in a relationship with a woman, specifically a woman, you're supposed to be her provider, and you turned her into your object from which you squeeze out, extract satisfaction. Do you know how toxic that is for your relationship? Do you know there can be no intimate relationship under such conditions? And then is it under any wonder to you why after a while she has nothing left to give because you've squeezed her dry. She has nothing left to give. Well, she lost her passion. She lost her interest. You squeezed her dry. Okay. And then you say, "Well, the porn is so much more stimulating." Yeah, I guess because you know, you could keep squeezing it dry and uh as soon as uh you know, I mean, the porn never gets tired. It's just, you know, it's it's it's recordings. It just it never it Play it again. Play it again, Sam. Just go back to the beginning, right? Where whereas you're dealing with a human being, yeah, they get tired. They get exhausted. And if you're treating a person like pixels, yeah, eventually they're going to have nothing left to give. And then you as a man are going to go off and sulk and say, "Why? Why? Why did she lose her passion? Why did she why is she not into it anymore?" You literally squeezed her dry. That's it. You just took the sponge and just squeezed it out. You didn't put anything into it. You only squeezed out of it. Of course, it's empty. It's empty. So pornography in short inverts the entire male female paradigm by turning men into takers in the area of sexuality where their masculinity is supposed to be most pronounced. Get it out of your life. Zero tolerance. Not even one second. get it out of your It gives you nothing productive because like I said, the only thing productive a man can get is something that he's given to a woman he's devoted to and she gives him back in upgraded fashion. Okay? You're not gaining anything. You're not even getting pleasure because ultimately, like I said, it's like eating a meal and then being hungry right away again. So, it it it's just destroying you as a man. It's destroying your masculinity. Eliminate it completely from your life and you will be so much healthier and and so much more of a man.