Why Is Yom Kippur Called the Happiest Day of the Year? Rabbi Yitzchak Breitowitz

[music] >> We are approaching the holiest [music] day of the year, the day of Yom Kippur, the day of atonement, the day of forgiveness. [music] And the interesting thing, many of us look at Yom Kippur as a somber day, a very serious day, almost a sad day, in which we think about our averos and our imperfections. But in reality, the Mishna says in Masachet Taanit, that Yom Kippur, along with the 15th of Av, which is not our topic, was literally the happiest day of the year. The day of the second luchos coming down, the second tablets, the day of forgiveness. Even the English word atonement can be divided up, although I'm not sure you're permitted to make homiletical interpretations of English, but atonement is at-one-ment. You are one with God. A glorious day, a joyous day. Uh people have given a mashal. Let's imagine that Yom Kippur would only come every 50 years. People would talk about every 50 years, there's this great day where God forgives us and God wipes away our sins if we repent. What a glorious thing it is, and your zayde would talk about the Yom Kippur of 50 years ago. But nebach, we take it for granted. Hashem gives us this great gift every single year. And we don't always realize how realize how joyous it is, how happy it is, what a glorious opportunity to become pure, to fix things up. What I do want to discuss is that in the time of the temple and we read about this in the Musaf, one of the most mysterious parts of the Yom Kippur service is the scapegoat. Two goats were designated and the goats have to be identical in height, in appearance, in color, in age. And one goat is designated as the sacrifice for God, whose blood is brought into the Holy of Holies. And the other goat, which is called the scapegoat, is sent out to the desert and pushed over a mountain cliff and dies in that particular way. It's not even a korban, it's not even brought in the Beit Hamikdash. It's called sair la'azazel, the goat that is offered to the desert demons. Or Hazal call it sair hamishtale'ach, the goat that is sent into the desert. Chas v'shalom, it even resembles quasi idolatry, God forbid. And yet, of all of the rituals that are performed on Yom Kippur, the scapegoat is the most powerful source of atonement, more than the blood that is brought into the Holy of Holies. The exact meaning of the scapegoat is very elusive, it's deeply mystical. And there's no way that we can really hope to fully understand it. But I just want to share with you one insight, one partial insight, that is based on the writings of Rav Shimshon Raphael Hirsch. And he focuses on the idea that essentially we have two goats. One goat goes on the pathway to God, Holy of Holies. The other goat goes on the pathway of death and destruction. And this is indeed the human fork in the road that we all face. We each can choose the path of life and union with Hashem. We can choose path of death and destruction. But what is the significance that both goats are identically the same? To remind us that the bad goat is not born bad. It's not inherently bad. And the good goat is not inherently good. It's a matter of the choice. Choice in terms of the lottery. In other words, Rashi first points out that the ritual of the sa'ir hamishtale'ah says that the evil doer should never say, "I was just born I was born with a bad nature. What can I do about it?" That's not true. Both goats start off life the same way. It is the labeling, the positive and the negative labeling that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. And this is something that's very relevant to us because very often, far too often, we self-label ourselves in a negative way. We think to ourselves, "I'm not good enough to do this. I'm not righteous enough to do this. Who do I think I am to try to learn Torah every day or whatever it is?" And sometimes this may be a message that we got from our childhood. Sometimes from parents, sometimes from some teachers, sometimes from family, from friends or so-called friends or people we interacted to. But it becomes so deeply intertwined into our personalities that that negative voice, "You're no good. You're not good enough." keeps on reverberating. And the video gets replayed in an infinite loop. And it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. And the lesson of the sa'ir hamishtale'ah is inherently every human being has the capacity to be righteous and good. It's the label that destroys you. Do not allow the self-label to destroy your growth in Avodat Hashem. There is a passage in the daily Arvit prayer. We actually say it on Shabbat and Yom Tov as well. Excuse me, for Hashem Satan milfanenu umacharenu. Remove the Satan from in front of us and from in back of us. So, the question becomes, I understand the Satan that's in front I want to go do a mitzvah. I want to go to shul. I want to learn. I want to daven. And the Satan, the yetzer hara, is trying to block me from going forward. So, I ask Hashem, remove that yetzer hara that's blocking me from going forward. But, the question is, what does it mean the Satan that's in back of me? If I've already passed him, I'm doing okay. So, I'm going to give you two quick answers on that. The first is a very, very famous portion of the Chofetz Chaim. Where the Chofetz Chaim says that just as there is a Satan that is blocking you from doing mitzvot, there may be a Satan that is pushing you to doing mitzvot, such as the voice that says, "Why don't you learn till 3:00 in the morning? Why don't you fast on Monday and Thursday?" It looks like it's a great thing, but ultimately it'll destroy your health and destroy your concentration. So, the Chofetz Chaim says, we have to realize that just as there's a yetzer hara that wants to stop us from doing mitzvot, there may be a yetzer hara that is pushing us to do mitzvot knowing that at the end of everything we're going to fail and he's going to have us. That is a famous p'shat of the Chofetz Chaim. But, I want to share with you another thought, which in some ways is almost the opposite. I believe it's from Rebbe Nachman of Breslov. The Satan in front of me is the same as the first p'shat. I'm trying to do a mitzvah but the Satan blocks me. What is the Satan in back of me? So here with Nachman says a beautiful thing. Let's say a person chose to do sin. A person chose the wrong things. But now he wants to go back. He wants to do teshuvah. He wants to return. There was a Satan in front of him that enticed him to sin. But now there's a Satan in back of him that's saying, "Who do you think you are that you can do teshuvah? Who do you think you are that God cares about you? Who do you think you are that you could change yourself for the better? You're pretentious. You're grandiose. It's not going to happen." And Reb Nachman of Breslov says, "The Satan that whispers in my ear, 'You're not worthy.' is even worse than the Satan that made me sin in the first place. The Satan that made me sin in the first place, that is a momentary lack of control. I did an aveira. But the Satan in back of me that when I want to do teshuvah, literally, I want to return, that Satan is blocking the door saying, 'You're not worthy.' That is a perpetual yetzer hara that prevents any spiritual growth at all. We have to remember the lesson of the two goats. Even the so-called bad goat is exactly the same as the good goat except for the labeling. We have to remember not to self-label ourselves. I just want to end with a story. I don't know what the source of the story was. But a king who constructed a huge tower, a tower of 1,000 stories high. And the king said that anyone who can climb to the top of the tower and via the staircase will merit to marry my my daughter. Most people looked at a tower that was a thousand stories long and they basically said what's the purpose? I'm not going to be able to do it. Why should I even bother to try? One person said, I'll see what I can do. He goes five stories, 10 stories, 20 stories, 20 stories, he's already out of breath. He only has another 980 stories to go. People are laughing at him. People are mocking him. People are making fun of him. But he says, I'll go as much as I can go. And he goes and he goes and he goes and he goes. And finally, and everyone is laughing, everyone thinks he's such an idiot. And at the 50th story, he collapses in utter exhaustion, 950 stories away from where he needs to go. But at the 50th story, the landing turns into an elevator that takes him all the way to the top. He reaches the top and he's so happy to marry the king's daughter. This is a beautiful mashal for what the avodah of teshuvah is. In the avodah of teshuvah, we sometimes look at everything we have to fix and it seems to be an impossible task. It seems to be something that we're not able to do. So, why bother? Now, this person, too, had no ability to go to the thousandth story. But he did as much as he could and only when he did as much as he could, did Hashem then take over and bring him to the top. But had he not gone to the 50th story, had he not gone to the point of exhaustion, God would never have taken him up to the top. That's our avodah. We have to do whatever we can. Even if we think it's so minimal and so meaningless and so small, but we do the best that we can. And then at some point, Hakadosh Baruchu takes over. The Gemara in Sukkah says that the yetzer hara of a person gets stronger and stronger and stronger every day. V'ilmaleh Hakadosh Baruchu azro, and without Hashem's help, lo yachol we would never win. There is no way we can do it by ourselves. But Hashem says, "Do what you can and then I will take over." But I will take over only when you do what you can. That is the partnership of teshuvah. We do our little effort and Hashem then takes over. And this is what Chazal say, "Open for me like the eye of a needle." A little opening. "Open your heart to me and I will open you up like the width of the doors of the Beit Hamikdash that were very, very wide openings." And this is what Hashem told Moshe Rabbeinu after the cheit hamaraglim, when Hashem wanted to destroy the Jewish people. And Moshe prayed, Vayomer Hashem, and Hashem said, we say this in selichos, salachti kidvarecha, "I forgive you according to your words." And in the Sifrei Chasidut, the ta'am is, salachti, "I forgive you as much as you want to be forgiven." If you truly want, you will find. May Hakadosh Baruchu give us all the gift of forgiveness, the gift of purification, the gift of relationship, the gift of atonement. And may our Yom Kippur be joyous, inspirational, and connecting to the Jewish people and to Hakadosh Baruchu.