What Made Simchat Beit HaShoeva the Greatest Joy in the World? Rabbi YY Jacobson

What we're going to address today is something very exciting, pun intended, and that is the deeper and the nature of the joy of sukus from a a deeper emotional and spiritual point of view. Everybody knows that one of the harder things to attain in life is sim joy because it's elusive. What exactly is joy? What makes a person happy? Why are there some people happier, some people less happy? What's the secret of joy? It's one of those things that uh um I think there's a book by Dennis Prager titled happiness is a serious problem. And I once heard from him the way he got the title was he was invited by uh Rabbi Schlim Schwarzy of Kabad of UCLA many many years ago to give a lecture for the UCLA students and the topic was uh happiness. So he says what do you want me to say? Well, he said happiness is a serious problem. Said, "Oh, great. That's the lecture and that became the book." Something like that. Sukus are eight days dedicated and defined as although joy is a mitzvah all year around even as a we say it every morning. Serve Hashem with joy. And when do you serve Hashem? 24/7. So really simk is a mitzvah 24/7. Yet, like everything in Yiddish, there are days of the year that are highlighted, that are focused, zoomed into this particular theme. Even though it's an all year experience, in other words, these are not one-time events. They're all year, but there's times that we zoom into that experience. They take the focus of it. It's like you celebrate a birthday or an anniversary. You should celebrate your birthday every day of the year. I hope you do. The fact that you were born is a celebration every day. And the anniversary is a celebration every day. and other similar celebrations. It's just we take the time to zoom in and focus with a heightened awareness. So sukus is called in dings which means that it's a time focused particularly on joy. What exactly is the nature of this joy? You might say the previous days were days of a lot of pressure days of awe. There's an intensity and whenever people finally release the tension and pressure it's like okay [laughter] let's relax. But that's a very limited form of joy. That's joy that's just contrasted. I was in a lot of pressure. The pressure ends. Okay, now I could breathe. Besides really, it would mean then that sukus is almost like, okay, thank God is over. Thank god Rashana is over, which would seem strange. So there's different ways of looking at this joy, but let's get to the to the bottom of it and to the crux of it because not only is it a time of joy, we see that our sages have attributed a certain type of sim to this time of the year. And let's see what they say inside. So in the source sheets, by the way, the source sheets are loaded on the yeshiva.net if you ever want to retrieve them later from the computer. Suka, this is the track they dedicated to this holiday sukus. And in the Mishna in the fifth chapter and in the Gammorra page page 51B B we quote you have it in the original and also the English our sages taught me one who did not see the celebration known as Bashva the place of the drawing of the water never saw celebration and joy in his or her entire life. Quite a statement. Like if somebody says to you, you know, if you haven't spin at this wedding, you've never been at a wedding. If you have not seen the excitement, you've never seen excitement in your life. Now, people talk like this in somewhat of a dramatic way, right? You've never seen a smogus board like this in your life. How somebody could waste so much money, but they could. You've never seen. But the truth is, it's a little exaggerated. You never seen a wedding. You've never seen. But our sages are very, very particular. And this even comes from the Mishna which means every word is precise that somebody who did not see never saw in their entire life. It can't be they were not at a joyous occasion. What if they had joyous occasions? What if they saw joyous occasions? No. Something is is is very very curious about such a grandios and transformative and emphatic statement that if you haven't seen this joy, don't even think you ever saw joy. And he's not over yet. He says once we're ready talking about things you haven't seen, let's go for it. somebody who did not see Jerusalem in its glory never saw in THEIR ENTIRE LIFE ANYWHERE in the world a beautiful city never and then somebody who didn't see the mikt in its fully glorious constructed state never saw a magnificent structure may never forever they never saw such a structure [snorts] so three things we If you haven't seen, you never saw joy. If you haven't seen and its glory, you never saw a beautiful city. If you haven't seen the Bikash and its full construction, you never saw a beautiful amazing structure. What's curious about all these three is he could say it in the positive, but he says it in the negative. Could say it in the positive. He could say was the greatest joy in the world. Bikar is the most beautiful structure. It's said in the negative which is very interesting. If you didn't see this then you never saw you could say it in the positive. Why say it in the negative also the order is interesting. He starts with [clears throat] which was inside the mikdash goes to and then goes back to the btd either the order should be from outer in or inside out which means start with whoever did not see never saw a beautiful city. Whoever did not see the bikdash never saw a beautiful structure. Whoever did not experience which was inside the Bikes never experienced joy or do it the other way. This order is also very very interesting. Now what happened at technically why is it called simply the technical details of what happened the says we say it in the you should draw water means with joy. We have a traditional that on sukas there's a special mitzvah called which means pouring the water and that is every single morning of suk is at dawn they would go down if you ever visited the shilak spring anybody went to it's an amazing place I even had this to dip there in the mikvah there people who go there every morning every Friday so it's an incredible place because that's literally the shily spring from where they drew the water for this joy, for this experience of sukus, a whole procession would go down. Remember sukus was a time, one of the three times a year that the Jewish people from all over the land and the world would come do aliere. They would visit the holy temple in Jerusalem. So there were huge crowds of Jews, huge, huge crowds from everywhere in the country and everywhere in the world, whoever could make it. And every single morning there was this procession. This was pre pre- sunrise. So very early they would go down to the Shillayak spring draw water bring it back up because you had to go up till today you could see how you have to go up to the temple mount of the Harabas. They would blow trumpets and chaur and then in the morning the cayenne when they offered the carbon the morning offering every morning was offered usually they would pour wine together with the carbon every day was called some wine was poured on the altar but every day of sukus there was an additional mitzvah to pour together with the wine also water the water that they just drew from the spring and as a preparation for this mitzvah they would dance all night and that's why it was called simkas base hasheva shva in Hebrew means to draw to collect something like is a water a water uh somebody who who draws water and would deliver it to people it's called you draw water so it's the place of the drawing of the water they would draw the water and bring it to the bd and all night literally they would dance and not only they danced they would light up the harabayas. It says that a woman inim could select and sift out her wheat from pebbles from the light of the manuras that they lit on the night of Bashva. The greatest sages would juggle torches of fire. Everybody was there, men and women and children celebrating, dancing, watching, observing. And this was every single night of sukus. And in the morning they would stop the dancing, pour the water and then move on with the day. So on this the Mishna the garra says if you didn't see this you never saw in your entire life and if you didn't see your in its glory you never saw a beautiful city. If you didn't see the bd in its glory you never saw a beautiful temple. So we want to understand what was so unique about this that you never saw any it's a very very dramatic statement. Why is it said in the negative not in the positive? And what is the meaning of these three things and in this particular order? Another very fascinating thing is the sources here out of order. If you look to the second to the last source, second to your last source yesterday we read after maft is considered a highlight of the year and uh it's the story of ya the prophet who runs away or tries to run away from hashem and it's one of the nima and ya is the story where hashem tells him I want you to go to ninve and speak and prophesize to Ninve about the corruption and their need for repentance and Ya doesn't want to and he gets on a boat in Yafo going to a place called Tarses and his wife decides he's escaping his destiny. We all know the story. A tumultuous chaos and tsunami in the sea. They ultimately throw him off the ship. He's swallowed by a big fish or a whale. That's where he prays, spits him out. He survives miraculously and ultimately makes his way to Ninve. It's fascinating that Kazal saw a deep connection between Yina and Sukus even though we read him on but that's one of the reasons and if you'll take a look in the second to your last sushi suki chapter five of Yeshua Levy the son of Ley saidma why is it all called? It's true that they drew the water, but why is that the name of it? Because from there, they didn't only draw water. They also drew divine inspiration was a place where you drew. One of the sages interestingly his name was Ya said Yona the son of Amiti whose maft we read on Yamipper he was one of the Jews. He was a regular guy and he went up to the bushel. He went up onus to visit and be in he entered into the celebration of and that's how he became a prophet. He became a prophet at Simbash. He went in and he experienced a heightened sense of divine enlightenment and inspiration, holy spirit and he became a prophet. And the whole story of ya therefore begins by to teach you because divine inspiration dwells on a joyous heart, a tranquil heart. When somebody is anxious and stressed, which are normal features of life, it's normal. It's very normal. But it's very difficult to experience your own of flow because I become very very uptight and I become very very defensive and the nervous system is anxious and the amygdala is very very scared which are all normal human reactions. So there's a lack of openness. my antennas can't channel the full glory and energy of life. I mean, we all know it in our own life when we are uptight and we're anxious about something and we're overwhelmed or you're feeling very guilty or shamed or pulled in a thousand directions or something else is really really sitting in our chest. We could force it as much as we want, but it's not going to work. It's either I'm open or not. And I have to be able to acknowledge the fact that we go into different modes at different periods of the day, which we'll soon see. This is the whole story here. And something opened up for him and he experiences a divine flow. That's the story of so it's interesting that the whole story of ya somehow is also connected to that's where he began his spiritual tenure and afterwards he tries to run away from hashem and he gets swallowed up and he goes to nve and the whole story that we read after of so this two is connected to what's the connection to why did it happen at there were a lot of prophets we don't say that all these prophets began at with that's when it happened it wasn't something that he was planning. He comes there and something opened up for him. What does this mean? What opened up for him? How do you exactly you get? People are dancing. It's a beautiful thing. It's a gishmaka thing. But how exactly do you get when people are excited or joyous? What is the meaning and what's the connection to him? So let's jump right into it. And here we see the depth of the plymus of Tyra. You know, you could read all these things and it's like, okay, fine, it's nice, but what does it really mean for me? What does it really mean for us? What is the underlying energy behind all of this? So, here we have the gift of going a step deeper and seeing the inner soul of all of this. over the years on the would and discuss a lot of suggested this as well and the following explanation is based on that explanation the way I understood and the way I want to apply it basically for today's time and today's days and today's generation to all understand this we have to always understand something fundamental and that is when we speak about the bdash we're not speaking about something only in the past or only in the future of Of course, it's something in the past and in the future, but the experience is a constant experience because as the says make and I'm going to dwell not in it but in them. So say it should have said in it. It says in them because it's the mikdash was a place that helped people get in touch with the divine energy inside themselves. It's not like you went to the biktd and in that place all the action happened. It was this place that inspired and empowered the experience internally. Now there's no physical but there's still a physical person a body and a soul. So the is applicable and in many ways the mdish is even deeper today. It says because today I have to find it inside myself. I can't just say okay somebody is doing it on the top of a mountain. No no I'm the one the buck stops here. It's an internal experience. One of the rebas Marash once said as follows. He said something beautiful. The Gmorra said when Hashem says something, it's like it's done, right? He he he spoke the world into existence. Yeah. I could speak from today till tomorrow, nobody's doing anything. But Hashem spoke the world into existence. He says from the moment Hashem said, I'm going to dwell in them. So, Hashem's words are action. And the heart of every single Jew became a mikdash. When Hashem said the words for Shakanti, it changed something like a genetic mutation that from then the heart of every single Jew for eternity became a bamed. And then the Reb Marash added and when this Jew went up to the physical Ba Mikdash, the grace of Ba Mikdash in the CLA mikdash in hearts. When this Jew came to the BA mikdash, the larger BA mikdash was now mirrored and embodied in the small basa mikdash in his or her heart. So it's not two separate things mikdash and we all come for a pilgrimage to visit as good tourist tourists. No, there was an energetic connection because the bame mikdash lives in the heart in a miniature form emotionally. And when the two met so the larger B mikdash now like a mirror reflects the one standing in front of a mirror in the sense that now you could see the person through the mirror. So now your heart became an experiential embodied reflection and continuum of the energy in the sov is not just a physical story. They went and they took water and they poured the water of course that too and we're going to re resume that of mamish with the third bik may it be even before the sukus together with that the primary element is the experiential element the embodied element what does that mean in a person's life for this rashi and the raman open up vistas into the secret of bashv it wasn't just any joy there was something very special about about it and unique which will open us up to understand everything we discussed in the beginning of the class. So if you take a look in your second source, it begins with what would seem like a verse that's completely not connected to any of this talking about salt and that is in par. The Tyra says it's your second source vikra Leviticus 2:3 every one of your meal offerings you should salt with salt. You shall not emit the salt of Hashem's covenant from being placed upon all meal offerings. So very interesting. Any offering that was brought in the B mikdash or in the Mishkan before it was took placed on the altar first it had to be salted. Now I understand when a human being is eating you say salts the salt need the salad needs a little salt the soup needs a little salt needs a little salt if it wasn't salted but what's this you're taking the meal offerings taking something flour of wheat or barley or another meal offering and you're placing it on the misbeh and before that it needs to be salted the same is true with all the animals that were offered even if they offered wood the wood was salted [laughter] nobody's was eating wood but there was a carbon called carbonates you can offer wood as an offer that also was salted everything was salted and he says it's a covenant with Hashem do not eliminate do not admit this covenant what does this mean so Rashi says and he quotes their quotes it next line there was a covenant made with salt from the six days of creation >> [snorts] >> The lower waters were promised that they would be offered on the altar. How? Through the salt. The salt which comes from the oceans deep in the oceans. The salt the sources of salt and the water libations on the festival of sukus. This was a covenant that was made with the lower water to be used as salt and to be used as a libation for sukus. What does this mean? What is Rashi talking about? What Rashi is saying is we go back now to the first day to the beginning of creation. This is the concept of and higher water and lower water. In the beginning of creation beracious which we start reading basm created light and light was called day darkness was called night. Okay at that point it says the spirit of hashem is hovering over the water. Then comes day two. Day two hashem says let there be a split inside the water. There should be some form of firmamenta a heaven inside the waterd it should separate the water. There's the water above the firmament above the raka above the heaven and there's the water that we are experiencing which is below the heaven. And ultimately that would include all of the oceans and all of the seas and all of the rivers and all of the canals and all of the springs and all of the wells any gathering of water mikvayim that we have here in our world. and even rain because rain is the water that comes from the oceans and gets drawn up and then it comes back down from the clouds to be able to irrigate our planet so we can survive. That's all the lower water but then there's the higher water. So this raia this heavenly firmament split the waters you have the higher water you have the lower water and that happened on Monday in fact it's the only day on which it doesn't say every day of creation it says Hashem saw it was good so say why because the first the fight between the waters the first split the higher water the lower water comes rashi and says we know and very interestingly our sage says in z that from That day the lower waters are crying. Why are they crying? They say one thing. We want to stand in front of the king. Why? What did we do to be detached, to be separated, to be under the we want to be there. So from that day, they're crying. And by the way, is the acronym. It says in we'll see because that's what they're crying about. We want to stand in front of the king. Where is his place? So, Hashem comforted the water. How did he comfort the water? He said two things. First of all, all the carbonosis in the basikdash are going to have salt. That's the first comfort. That's number one. The second comfort is not salt. It's water itself on sukus. Every morning they're going to go draw water pour it on the misbeak and that's the comfort of the water. THAT'S THE COVENANT he made with the water in response to its pain and anguish over the fact that it was separated. So that's what Rashi is saying here that he made a covenant with the water that onus is going to pour the water and the water can relax. Now anyone who reads this, it's like this is very very strange. First of all, if you did something wrong and that's why you're comforting the water, so don't do it. You don't have to separate the waters. If it was the right thing to separate the waters, so just tell the water it's the right thing. What does it even mean that the lower water is crying? What is that representing? What are they crying about? This is what God wanted. This is what God wanted. What they have their own vision of creation? And how is Hashem comfort the water by saying, "By the way, 8 days they're going to pour you on the altar. Okay, my my partner up there gets to stay up there forever and I am down here detached for eight days." They take a goblet of water, they pour IT ON THE MISBAYAK. OKAY, NOW I SHOULD BE HAPPY. And how much water is even going on the misbay? One cup of water, not a lot. Three lo and very little, not much. How is that a comfort? And here's the interesting thing. From this comes the whole sim. And not only that, our sages say if you didn't see this, YOU NEVER SAW IN YOUR LIFE. So there's something at stake here that is so powerful that by bringing this water and pouring it onto the altar, it doesn't only heal some of the pain. It doesn't only heal some of the anguish but nah and furthermore it generates such an explosive sense of simka to the point that you say there's no sim like this in the world. What's the what's the secret behind this? The answer to all of this is that this story of the split waters that was repaired on sukas is not just a story about water on top and water on the bottom. It's the internal story of the fabric of creation. The split of day two is the essential split which is the source of most anxiety in a person's life. The lower water crying is not just water crying and weeping. I want to be here. Why did you get this part of the birthday cake? I want this part of the birthday cake. It's an essential outcry that comes from the lower waters and somehow sukus and the pouring of the water was a response to this or a healing of it or a transformation of it. Yeah. >> What does salt have to do though >> we they guess the salt from the oceans >> the salt in the oceans. So there was two things how he comforted the water. One is by using the salt on every carbon and then even more using the actual water on sukus. You got it? Yeah. Yeah. They're still looking, you know. >> Every few years they say there's water here, there's water there, there's water here, there's water on this planet, there's water on that planet. >> Huh. Right. >> Right. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They say the universe is surrounded by ice or there some some Yeah. Oh, so fascinating. >> That may be my the higher water. That could be part of it. Yeah, it's always a discussion. Are there water on any other planets? They've once said that they found water here, they found water there. I don't know if anything is conclusive, but now that there's ice around the universe, there's all of these types of discoveries. What does this really mean? Because certainly, you know, they've been searching for life on other planets for a very long time. But in recent years, they defunded most of the research because it was going nowhere. It was it was it was pretty feutal. And water is the most basic element that you need to support life. Right? So the question is, is there water? Maybe no life, but is there water? Is there ice? Is there something? Yeah. And why is this so significant? And what is the me real what is the real meaning of this besides the physical properties? The answer to this is water as we know is the source of life. Even a fetus in the womb is developed and enveloped by water. 70% of each cell is made up of water. Which means most of our body, even though it doesn't look like it, but most of our body is actually made up of water. Water is the staple of life. We don't only need to drink water in order to irrigate ourselves and hydrate ourselves and live, but water is essentially life. And that's why life begins in water. And as a result of that, Mayim represents one of the most powerful and essential. We take water for granted but we never should because water equals life. Water also represents pleasure. The flow of water represents tug. You see it also practically when a person goes to the water, you go to the ocean, you go to the beach, there's something very very sensually pleasurable about water. It also generates the growth of so many pleasurable delicacies and foods and fruits and vegetables and grains and so on and so forth. May also represents a flow. A flow of inspiration, a flow of enlightenment, a flow of pleasure. That's mayab. When we speak about higher water and lower water, it means on Sunday there was no higher and lower. There was once water and then there was a split in the water. And from that split there's melonim and as says there's higher water and there's lower water. What does that split look like? What does that split mean in a person's life? That split is one of the most dramatic splits in consciousness because premon on day one day one in various is not called it's called [clears throat] then so rash says it should have said first is then why is it the answer is because on day one there was only there was no split and what that means is that in consciousness of day one there's one source of life there's one source of bliss there's one source of pleasure and that is when I am channeling the divine there's oneness and when I I'm experiencing nothing but being a channel being a conduit for Hashem that's the water of day one there's no other definition of pleasure there's no other definition of happiness there's no other definition of bliss Because the truth is there is one source, one living source for everything and that source is the source of all goodness, all bliss, all and it's alive. We say every day of I said over on Shabas from this what's all these words remember us for life the king who wants life write us in the book of life because of you the god of life. So it's not just a poem and putting in a lot of times the word. It's essentially a very very deep message and we'll see why that leads into sukus. Remember us for life. The king who desires life. Write us down in the book of life because of you a god of life is saying that elim is hashem is life. What does it mean hashem is life? The worst thing somebody can do to Hashem is turn Hashem into some form of object or being or entity, physical or even spiritual, but there's like Hashem and there's me. Hashem is not Hashem and there's me. I am Hashem. Hashem is me. It's an embodied experience. Hashem is the flow of life. There's two ways of a person living. One is dead and one is alive. Dead means where life becomes like objects. It's almost like a thing. Even my heart, it's a thing. There's one thing and another thing. And that's torturous because real life is that there is a life. There's a flow. Hashem is not some thing living in the clouds or living in the heavens or living in the earth where he is here and Hashem is there and Hashem is truly everywhere. We relate to things as beings whether physical beings or spiritual beings. But here you're dealing with life itself. It's not a tangible being or even an intangible being. It's the flow of life and therefore it can't be described as an entity or a reality because it's it's it's a dynamic. It's a dynamic reality where you're simply you're living it. And I can't describe that in words because whenever words are here to describe things and objects. You relate a little bit to what I'm saying? When we say something is a word, I say it's a table, it's a bottle, it's a person, it's a machine, it's a home, it's a big home. But here we're talking about how do you describe life? It's a flow. It's a living living energy. Is that's what it is. It's alive. Being in that life means I'm in flow. I'm channeling that presence of life. That's day one. What happens on day two? There's a split in the water. From that day, there are two different definitions of bliss. There's and there's and they're split. There's two different definitions of what life is. There's two different definitions of what happiness could be. On day one, there was no split. There was no definition. On day two, there's a higher consciousness and there's a lower consciousness. What's the higher? What's the first the lower consciousness that's very that we all relate to immediately? The lower consciousness is I'm looking for happiness to fill me. I'm looking for some bliss. And these are all the numbers that we have in the world. And there are a lot of them. And I'm calling them numbers. They're not such numbers because a lot of them could be very very exciting. So it's all the what are the you know that line? Whoever dies with the most toys wins, right? It's toys. Now, toys are fun. Let's face it. Especially when I'm one and two and three. Toys are a lot a lot of fun. But sometimes I don't grow out of toys. It's just my toys expand. When I was 2 years old, it was a fire truck. And now I'm 50 years old or 54 years old or 60 years old. So, I have bigger hagas of what a toy is. A fire truck is not going to do it. It's like in the olden days, you remember for the ka you got a prize. If your father was very rich, you got a parker pen. You know, today you're going to give your child a parker pen. They'll call child services on you, right? They want a private jet, a yacht, Lamborghini. Okay, if your mama is a you could buy me a tablet, but but anything less, right? So, the toys have different but essentially I'm still looking for the possessions. Sometimes it's even spiritual toys. It's not physical toys. Sometimes it's physical toys and sometimes it's spiritual toys. That's all. I'm looking somehow to be alive to give some significance to my life through getting something that is pleasurable. >> What's a spiritual toy? That's a good question. Yeah. And she says, "The joke is galongan. It's a good joke." Very good. >> She said her great aunt told him, "Kip in the hospital, life is a joke." So she answered, "But if you live like you, it's a good joke." In Yiddish, they say it's a galongan a joke. It's a How do they say galongan? >> In in English, the jokes's not galongan. >> They're just jokes. It's a successful joke. >> Successful. A spiritual toy would be like an aliyah and or something like that. >> Very good. A spiritual toy could be an aliyah and shul. That's possible. But it can even be more. It could be, and this is a very sensitive thing, it could be using religion to be able to satisfy my anxiety or my underlying ego. Using religion for approval, using even Hashem because it's like on my checklist. That's where I grew up. you know this is the authority so I'm using him what's the challenge at the end the heart is tortured because the only real bliss in the world can happen from the ego and the insecurity surrendering surrendering into the oneness so it's never a competition like when am I going to get Hashem to finally do what I want that's based on the premise that it's two separate realities and somehow he has all the power in the world which by definition creates sometimes a lot of anxiety and sometimes even hate even if it's hard to admit. It's like it's very very hard to live with that and it's a very normal experience because the water did go through a split. It did go through a split and therefore we live in that world where naturally intuitively I don't look to ego death for the source of bliss. I look to gather more, to possess more, to control more, to own more, to have more. And even if I'm a very very nice person, so I'm not a control freak necessarily and I tolerate other people which is an amazing amazing quality. But sometimes internally what I feel is that I need to figure something out in myself and I stay small and safe and in control because I don't have the mechanism of what does it even mean to let go and open up and lean in to a place of trust and faith and surrender which is always connected to the frequency of bliss. So the lower waters are crying is a perpetual state of existence. Why is it a perpetual state of existence? Because it's basically all the parts in ourselves that feel fragmented are searching for something. They have an essential anxiety. It's not an anxiety because somebody did something wrong. It's an essential anxiety. And that's why sensitive people don't realize. They're looking for the source of anxiety elsewhere. The source of the deepest anxiety is it's the lower waters crying. It's like we spoke in the previous class before that the soul essentially is it comes from a space of infinity and just the detachment of that is a very painful experience to know that is a blessing are crying all the discomfort I'm having in life is because I'm trying to heal this. So I think because I don't know I get a memo and the memo is of course this is missing in your life and this is missing in your life and this is missing and it may be true it is. So I try to pursue these things that are missing. I try to heal this and I try to fix this one and I try to fix everybody. Maybe I even try to fix myself. But essentially what's missing is I'm not aligned with the source of life. to be aligned the source of life. I want to let my separateness go. But it's not an easy thing because we go back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. But the only real experience of joy in a person's life is when they are subsumed in the infinite reality of Hashem. When Jacobson stops being a separate entity that now has to protect himself or build himself up or get certain things or figure out certain things or control certain things, but I can truly say I'm completely fine. I'm channeling the infinite light. I'm not life. Hashem is life. And we are all Hashem. We're all channeling life. Like the ray of the sun is channeling the sun. No ray gets upset at another ray. I never saw the ray of the sun coming into this beautiful building saying I don't like the other ray who's going into that house on Viola because I'm the only ray. The sun has enough light [laughter] for everybody's ray. There's no issue. The other ray is not taking away from this ray. The moment you're channeling that, nobody could take away anything from anybody else. It's impossible because my integrity will not be taken away by somebody else's integrity unless I'm living a fakeness. Unless I'm trying to to borrow something from you. It's interesting the word in for the abyss for gene for purgatory is sha is the same letters like the word borrowed because whenever I'm borrowing somebody's life that is the definition of the abyss. definition of the abyss is that I'm looking I'm looking okay oh she has something he has something emotionally psychologically financially whatever it is it's a very normal thing but but but what what what I need to understand is if I'm actually alive just like Hashem is not jealous of somebody having a nice house [laughter] right so when you're really in that flow it's amazing like you you're in touch with your life that's remember the part of me that's alive I don't want to live with a part of me that's dead. Because really, that's the difference. When I'm living in separation, it's really giving life to something that's dead. So, it's like investing money in a Ponzi scheme. There's nothing really there. Whenever I invest resources in my separateness, I'm investing something in in in some reality doesn't really exist. I always have to rebuild it. Whenever you have to build something doesn't really exist and you have to give it's an illusion that it exists, it's the hardest work in the world, right? making making my ego believe that it's valuable is the hardest effort in the world. It's avoid you understand why cuz I'm taking something that doesn't really exist and I'm literally trying to infuse it with fake life. It's a very very hard existence and the heart always knows the difference. It's a very deep deep difference. Yes. >> I just want to know how do I get [laughter] what do I do? I learn more. How do I get to such a point? >> But you understand the issue before how we get to it. You you feel the issue. You feel it. Yeah. >> We all do. Yeah. >> How to >> Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Great. Very good question. How do How do we get there, right? Okay. When you have the answer, you'll tell me. [laughter] I'm also working on it. Yeah. We also have to realize, okay, we're going to get there. how tempting it is because you know they call it lowhanging fruits. Whenever you have low hanging fruits it's just easy to take. If you have fruits that are hanging low you have to climb. It's an effort. Yeah. In life there are lowhanging fruits and there are fruits that are much higher. The lowhanging fruits are the fruits that are available. Right. So for example if I'm stressed out food is a lowhanging fruit. [laughter] It's just low hanging. My pantry has a lot of it. My refrigerator has a lot of it. Yeah. Drinks are a lowhanging fruit. Okay. Ego is a lowhanging fruit. Guilt is a very low hanging fruit. It could come like this. How long does it take you to feel guilty? Huh? If you're a Jewish mother, doesn't even take three seconds. Yeah, you're there already. Yeah. Shame is a very lowhanging fruit. Resentment, blame, tremendously low. It's very easy fruits to catch on to. I start blaming. Or here's another one. Telling stories, figuring things out. The inner critic in the brain has a you think Wikipedia is sophisticated. Wikipedia doesn't come close to your brain. We have a file on everybody figuring everything out because that somehow it makes me feel at least safe in my own imagination. I put myself v visavv everybody else and it's very easy to have low hanging fruits and these fruits are all affected by gravity in a very deep way which means they're pulled down. They always pull you down because they're being slept down constantly. The higher the higher fruits are called mayame. It's higher water. They're not so affected by gravity. Those are the frequencies always of trust, surrender, love, faith, amuna, bliss. Those are much higher hanging fruits. Those are those are the frequencies of humility, of openheartedness, of seeding control. And the lower water sometimes gets very upset. It's like if you give up control, your life is going to be a mess. Your house is going to be a your kids won't be taken care of. You're going to be the most irresponsible person. Oh, so now you're going to sit on a couch, meditate with Rabbi Yw's classes about surrender and bliss. And who's making sukus? Let him make sukus and have a deal. Let him come to the house, PREPARE THE WHOLE SUKUS. AND I'LL GO MEDITATE ABOUT BLISS. THANK you very much. And sip my iced coffee and like, God, thank you for this beautiful gift of sukus. I'm so stressed out. [laughter] Let him build my suka al so once he's at it. Yeah, these are all good questions because I also have to build a suk [laughter] and fix an awning and do some other things. So we we don't live in we live in a we live in a split. We live in and and and the insecurity of the ego like no of course I have to be worried. Of course I have to be anxious. I'm going to quote something very wise that I heard from my wife. [laughter] I heard it actually not directly. I heard it on a Tanya class in Mauy's home some time ago. It was right before Rashashana. So she was talking to the women and I guess a woman could say this to the woman. I wouldn't be able to say it but I quoting my wife so I could say it over and talking about the stress that people have on y and they wanted to be beautiful for the guests for themselves for their spouses for the atmosphere for the environment. But it comes with a lot a lot of stress between the cooking and the food and the cleaning and the help and the shul and the organization. I don't have to preach about that to crowd sitting in this room. But it's interesting if you ask somebody why why are you doing all of this? And they'll say cuz it's yumpt. They say what's this yumpt? It was before the yumpt is it's a yumpt when I coronate hashem as a king. So once again if hashem is the king it means you could give up control. So for the sake of yamt, I'm becoming more stressed when the whole point of the yamtiff is to coronate Hashem as a king. But the paradox of course is part of life. It's part of life because I get stuck in the experience itself. And that's why the split of the water is so important to understand because it's so easy to go to the lowhanging fruits in order to survive because I feel like I'm in control than to go back again and again every day into a space of deeper breathing, deeper presence, deeper alignment, deeper mindfulness, deeper connection, and deeper trust. Remember the part of me that's alive because I know you're a king who wants life. Write me down in a book of the living this year. I don't want to be in the book of the dead walking around like a like a zombie trying to control because you're actually a god of life. What what it means relationship with Hashem is a relationship with with the presence of life. It is embodied. I can't see Hashem or touch him or define him. You know what I could do? I could live him. I can embody him. I can flow. It can flow through me. Of course, as much as my body and soul could be a channel. So now now when a person understands this and also understands the struggle here I understands the struggle I may have once shared this with you but I'll share it it's it's just for me it was it made this very very visceral in my own life I give a lot of classes as you know and uh sometimes I give a class especially with the men I give a lot of classes and we're learning and I finish a class and bar hashem it went very very well it was obvious obvious how the people. Nobody fell asleep. Nobody was texting. It went very very well. People I could see how people were touched. And I could also feel it. I could feel it in the air. I could feel it in myself. I could feel it in the people. And a person may come over and say, you know, that was the most beautiful class I heard in my life. Or that was life-changing or was so meaningful. It was you opened my heart. You opened my mind. And I could mamish watch in myself a tugofwar. I could see it. I could literally I could see it with my mind's X-ray. There's two parts in me. One part of me wants to own that, wants [snorts] to literally take it home and like live off this these words because it's amazing at that moment, you know, so to speak. I own him. I own his energy. Like he owes his life to me and I want to like take that. It's great. You know, somebody just gave me a gift. I want to, you know, like the story of Kalum with the moon I told you. You know, you put the lid on the blank, you got the moon. You got the moon. What's better to go home than with the moon. What are you going to go home with? $100 you're going to go home. The moon is something to go home with. That's something to tell your friends, right? This it's literally and it's there. It's available for me. And then especially if another person comes back, a third person comes back. So, they're already confirming it. And yet, another part of me knows that that is a death sentence for me. And the reason is because I'm building up something that doesn't really exist. I'm building up an ego that doesn't really exist. I don't own it. It was information and wisdom that I had this that Hashem channeled through me because he wanted to use me as a channel. So I'm privileged. I'm great. It's certainly a beautiful feeling. But the moment I want to hijack it, I'm stealing from God. Somebody once wrote a beautiful line a woman wrote, "Creativity is easedropping on God." Creativity is easedropping on God. Now, if you eavesdrop on my conversation and then you go and you put it into a book and you sell 2 million copies, you're a Ganov. [laughter] At least say I was eavesdropping on the conversation and this is what I'm writing. All creativity is eavesdropping on Hashem. That's all it is. I'm a creator. I created something. That's what the word creativity means. You're channeling creation from the creative one. That's what makes you creative. Like we always speak about saying something in the name of the one who said it, right? That's the idea. You redeemed the world. So I'm EASEDROPPING ON HASHEM. WOW. YOU HAD THIS TO EASE DROP ON HASHEM. BEAUTIFUL. NOW YOU HAVE THE PRIVILEGE of sharing your what you eavesdropped. Beautiful. So say that. Thank you for being a channel. That's not torturous. Now the ego doesn't like that. You're stupid. YOU'RE AN IDIOT. TAKE IT HOME. HIJACK IT. BUT THIS IS LITERALLY the choice between building up something that's dead and it's only going to look alive until the next criticism which will come in 3 minutes and then I'm waiting for the next compliment which will come in 6 minutes and then it's on and off or it's bringing it all back to life because you are you're not a god of death. You're a god of life. It's a god of that's really alive. And when the heart does the heart know that it's alive only one way. The heart knows that it's alive when it feels like it's channeling and you know it. Your heart becomes alive suddenly. It's alive. It's not defensive. It [snorts] doesn't need a hijack. It doesn't need a control. It's in a very very calm, serene space because you're not in a defensive posture. You're right. I'm right. I'm going to score points, but I said this and you said this. I'm When I'm in that posture, I'm in a posture of death. I'm in a posture of of of trying to convince others or myself. I'm in a det I'm in a I'm in a detached place. You with me, Ebbertson? Okay. Fast. Yeah. >> Very powerful. Also, when when you don't get >> But she wants to know how to get there. >> When you don't get affected by praise, then you won't get affected by either. >> Yeah. Now, I should I should make a disclaimer because often people hear this and say, "What? You're not allowed to compliment anybody?" Of course, you're allowed to compliment. And if somebody comes over after the class and tells me it was a good class, I'm not going to sue you or take you to a denta because you put me into a posture of death. I will not do that. But what it is important to understand is there's when somebody gives feedback, it helps a person see their impact, their influence, where they can grow. Those are very very important things. It's very special. But it there's two types of feedback, right? This feedback that becomes like oxygen and that I have to understand where is my oxygen and then this feedback that simply it's a guide. It's a blueprint. It's like a map. It helps a person. So it's very very important to distinguish between the two. And in each of our lives, whatever position you're in, we each have that tugofwar because I can go here and I can go there. You know, sometimes sometimes I I'm a curious type of person. So sometimes I'll hear something, I'll see something and I get curious and I want to pry more. I want to know more. And then I have to ask myself, which part of me is looking for this information? Which part of me? You know, sometimes we talk, we have conversations, we have conversations about people. It's not lush and horror. We're just trying to help them. Okay, got it. But I have to go into my own honest heart and say, which part of me is curious to know this about this person? Is it the part of me that's alive that's dancing with Hashem? Or is it the part of me that's looking for it's looking for resurrection? And I hope if it's going to be good, juicy, interesting information, I'm going to feel good for like 8 minutes till the next conversation, till the next clip. And it's it's it's hard because I have to let go of that and say, you know what, it's not my living part that's looking for this information because whatever is happening in that person's life is completely irrelevant to me. If there's something I can help with, so let me know what I can help with and that's it. But anything outside of that, where do I have the five minutes to start dissecting their life when there's enough going on inside of here? Who's going to who's going to gain from this? Are they going to gain from it? No. Am I going to grow from it? No. I'm just learning about somebody's struggle or somebody's these are constant little little things in life but it's am I living in or the opposite we're gonna say right it's not just literally life versus death of course but there's also internal internal tells the Jewish people at the end of his life there's life and death you should choose life so the everybody chooses life even an animal chooses life an insect chooses life. I need to tell me choose life. And he says something so profound. And everything there is the living part of it and there's the dead part of it. The living part of it is that which is reflecting. The dead part of it is that which is not really alive. It's trying to make itself alive through covering up and through building up something that's fake. Always choose the living part. says that a Russia when they're alive they're dead. Why? They're not dead. They may be healthy and robust and they may be walking around and accomplishing a lot but there's an inner deadness whenever you're not in touch when my heart is not channeling. There's like an inner deadness and I feel it. There's like a boredom. You know the concept of people say I'm bored. Yeah. Some people say I'm what is boredom? Boredom really is disassociation. Hashem is not boring. Life is never boring. Life was never boring. And I can promise you it will never be boring. Not just because you have a lot of drama. Not that. Not just because I may be a drama. Not I'm not talking about that. Because life is not a boring experience. Life is an infinite vibrating pulsating reality of living presence and energy. It can be boring. What could be boring is I become boring because I'm not in touch with it. I'm like a dead object and now I'm looking to fill it with something. So I'm bored here. on board there. Somebody wanted to ask something. Somebody raised their hand. Yeah. Sorry. Yeah. >> Cooking. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Very good. Cooking is a very good example. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. >> Excellent. Why are we not going to the grocery? >> I should have my wife take over now. Yeah, she'll give you all the practical examples for cooking and everything. Yeah, it's a great question. It's a great question. But cooking is a classic example for this, right? If this becomes the litmus test of my worth, is the food good? Is everybody enjoying it? That's that's a classic example for it. So, here is where we need to bring it home. what that means in a real way like it's very nice in theory and all good and then you know life takes over and and pressures take over that's the bottom line not everybody could just afford just to be on vacation endlessly and go to a hotel for every single yumptiff and even then trust me there's stress I've been enough hotels you know what am I going to wear etc etc [laughter] hotels are very very hard it's not like there's an advantage of being in your house >> okay gazate gaze >> [laughter] >> I hear you. >> Is this means in all your ways you can have connection means connection. So this exactly >> huh? Why you connecting it to? It's true. Why you connecting it to bad alone? >> Alone. Yeah. >> Yeah. So what happened on sukus? What happened on sukus? It's not sukus is the tension of rashashana is over. Okay, let's breathe. Let's just chill out. Sukus is the culmination ofashany because essentially is the time that a person can identify in a easier way what makes them alive and what doesn't. That's why it's the time we say you want to be written into the book of life. So sometimes we misunderstand it as just a very simple thing that I should live this year and of course as we say in the m etc. But there's also something very emotional about it. To be written into the book of life means everybody is always writing their own book. Every moment of life we are writing a book. Zafer told us it doesn't necessarily mean writing with my computer or with my pen with my quill. Writing a book means every moment of life is writing a book because everything we say or we do or we think has an imprint in the world forever in a beautiful beautiful way. So which book am I writing? Am I writing a book of life or am I writing a book of the opposite of life? Whenever I choose and I say, you know what, that juicy conversation is not contributing to my inner heart's life. Cuz for the heart to be alive, the heart space is channeling Hashem's infinity. That's where it is. And when I'm looking for somebody else to entertain that and fill it, I'm now going to be riding a safer mus a safer opposite of life. So is a time the soul can easier have access to what is what and what is what is this side and what is this side then comes the joy of sukus it's the expression of that experience of y of oneness in a very visceral way on sukus so what does that mean this is where the water came in the lower water is now brought onto the msbak to poured on the ms becomes a carbon it becomes an offering this erupted in on this we say if you didn't see you never saw why such a negative statement the answer is and this is so profound because they're not saying is a great even the greatest it's saying if you didn't see this you never saw joy because it's really telling us the ultimate truth and that is everybody is looking for joy constantly let's face it maybe most of our life that's what probably motivates so much of what we do or at least huge amu disproportionate amounts for some people maybe it's 100% % 90% 80% but at some point I'm looking for some form of joy. Maybe I don't call it joy. Maybe I call it relief. Maybe I don't call it joy. Maybe it's giving my parents nas. Maybe it's not calling it joy. It's fitting into the community. It's doing the right thing. It's not being deemed a bad girl. Right? There's a there's a conveyor belt, right? You hatch them, you match them, you dispatch them. And there's some preconceived notion that if that works for you, everything is going to be happy. Everything is going to be perfect until it's not. And there are the kids that work with that conveyor belt and you hatch them, you match them, you dispatch them and just invite me for the bitzvah, I'll pay half. And then there's the kids already that like we're not we're not going with this uh with this cycle now. First time in six years took out one word because when these children are in a good place, it comes by itself. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. So so much of life is pursuing some type of wholeness like just make me feel good or make me at least feel that I'm doing the right thing Hashem that you like me that you're not going to punish me like so much of life is pursuing this type of and on this are sages in their own immutable way in one line capturing dozens of work of philosophy psychology theology emotional health growth saying if you didn't see How do they know? Nobody ever was happy. How do they know? Because they're saying like this. If you did not deal with the split of the higher water and the lower water in your life and realize that the only way the lower water will be healed is by helping it return to its source and yet acknowledging its unique mission as lower water. You can't see any other simka because any other sim in the world by definition will be trying to give meaning to an existence that is essentially wounded that is essentially flawed. So they're not trying to be pessimistic and say, "Oh, if you didn't come to my wedding, you never saw what a wedding is." If you didn't come to Well, they can't forget others. They say, "They're beautiful. PEOPLE ARE HAPPY. IT WAS AMAZING. WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO BE? WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO NULLIFY every like? IT'S NOT NICE. YOU DIDN'T COME TO MY HOUSE. YOU NEVER SAW A NICE HOUSE. WHAT DO YOU CARE? YOU HAVE A NICE HOUSE. BEAUTIFUL. OTHER PEOPLE HAVE A NICE HOUSE. IF SOMEBODY has a nice house, what's going to happen? You're going to die." Like Vilto. It's like but they're saying something actually the most healing thing everybody's looking for if I did not experience this experience confronting the lower water and the split between the higher water and the lower water and bringing up the lower water in this and understanding that it's still lower water because I don't bring up all the oceans and all the canals. It has a role as lower water. I know that I didn't experience in my whole life cuz all the other is I'm pursuing something and I'm trying so hard and we pursue it our whole our whole our whole life saying stop. The only real in life can happen when ultimately I'm ready to crack open my ego and insecurity and and separateness and let go. I tried everything else. We try everything else. I I know with myself, I tried a lot of other things. In the context of religion, I tried it. But even religion could be this. Even Yiddish could be this. I could learn a lot of Tyra. I could be a big I could do a lot of mitzvah. I could do a lot of I could do a lot of good things. And it's it's taky things and it's sacred things. And it it gives you reward and everything. And essentially, there's still a sense of detachment of disassociation deep down. Why? Because even though the Tyra is real and it's godly and the mitzvah is real and it's godly and this duck is real and it's godly, but inside of it there is an energy that is that is not alive, there's an energy that's torturous because I'm basically using the Yiddishkite to fill my guilt or shame and void and just building up something that's essentially separate. So actually it becomes even more toxic because I'm using oneness to fuel fragmentation. I'm using divinity which essentially is the inclusivity of everything and the death of all separateness to fuel a sense of fragmentation. And that's why you always know that in this type of work if it's not making me more humble and more humble and more humble and even more humble with more love with more love to people with more then something is off. If it's turning me into oh now I'm so enlightened the person is completely detached. So the not it's a prediction or a predicament or a pessimistic statement. They did not see because all the is like I'm trying to pull myself up by me pulling on my hair. Imagine doing that. I'm literally trying to pull myself up. I want to go higher. GO HIGHER. SO I'M PULLING MYSELF UP WITH my hair. You ever tried that? >> Huh? >> That's what you said spiritual voice. Yeah. Because who's pulling my my ego is trying to get rid of my ego. You understand? My ego my guilt is trying to get rid of my guilt. So that's at the core OF EVERYTHING. MY SEPARATENESS IS trying to get rid of my separateness. I'm I'm almost like trying to outsmart God and it's so torturous and the inner critic doesn't stop. So we try more and you force it more and you force it more. And really what it needs is a pause and to be able to observe everything and to be able to understand that there's something special in the May. It wasn't a mistake that the water was split. The purpose of the split is is to heal it. The purpose is to be able to take the lower waters and bring it back up to the source. That's why it was split and that's why there's always hope. It wasn't split in order to be split. It was split in order to create the momentum and the catalyst and the ability for a person to choose through their own agency and their own creativity to be able to bring this back up to the source. In oneness, there's no choice. There's no relationship. It's like we spoke last week. In the oneness, there's no relationship. It's just you're part of him. Hashem wanted the relationship. That's what Malus says. And the relation the relationship is you're separate. And now instead of choosing separateness, I can choose choice. I can watch all of these things. I can observe them. I can experience the pain of and that's not a tragedy. And then I could say and this is now going to go back to the source. There is no joy in the world like the real joy of the heart closed down because it's not experiencing Hashem. And that moment when the heart starts channeling even for a few seconds, the heart space starts channeling the living embodiment of Hashem, there's not going to be a bigger simka like that in life. You'll say, "Come on, what about $300 million?" $300 million in your bank account is a very good thing. And everybody should have it. Say what's real problem. [laughter] >> 300 million. I said >> scary. You could do amazing things. You give a lot of sodaka and do amazing things. Build a beautiful world. Still still all of these things they're good and they're gifts and they're privilege. It's all part of but the inner experience of contentment of one time experiencing a in your nervous system is not greater and better. It's a different magnitude. It's a different in you say, "Come on, you're hacking a China." It's not true. Forget with your micis, your a take your a and send it to Hawaii. I'm happy with the $300 million. I understand that money is a good thing and we all need money and everybody should have money and certainly it helps a lot when somebody is not struggling financially because it could be a very very expressive. I don't mean to minimize any of this. We live in this world where Hashem created money and with money we buy things and we buy toys and we buy some important things hopefully. But we still have to understand the is your soul is not made up of money. Your soul is made up of God. It's a big difference. You have to know that. And therefore $300 million is a tremendous gift and everybody should have it. But that's not what my soul is made up of. It's not made up of money. People think they're made up of that because they don't know who they are. So they want they don't know who they are and if they're given this gift it's a beautiful like any other talent that Hashem gives people gifts financially morally emotionally spiritually and they have a to illuminate the world with it to bring people closer to the truth that's what it is just like when that person gave me the compliment I can say it's a to be able to share this information it's a to be able to share money it's a to be able to share talent or whatever a person's gifts in this world are but when they become detached and a substitute for the source It becomes an endless source of internal void, internal anxiety. And that's why the person needs to know of you need to know what your soul is really really made up of. When the heart space experiences once the flow of life of Hashem flowing through your nervous system, you're safe. You're perfect. You're wholesome. Not because I'm perfect, but because perfection is channeled through me. because I'm part of perfection. This idea that you're evil at your core is ridiculous. It's ludicrous. You're divine at your core. We have our separation that we struggle with that we need to work with. That's why there's no sim like this. There's no sim like the child that was in captivity in Gaza and comes home to his mother after two years in Kamas's purgatory. And that hug, there's nothing that comes close to that. The soul essentially is a it's purely divine. Your heart is infinite. But it could be so stuck in the abyss of of borrowing other people's lives. And when that water came up to the misb instinctively [snorts] the souls danced the whole night because that part of you that has been exiled your whole life and I maybe have never even known it. And there's such moments a person has in life a person has in life and listen it's not something we can have every moment but I remember when I had once an experience I have a lot I grew up with I have a lot of anxiety inside of me but there was a moment that I could feel the anxiety lifted not forever for a few minutes lifted for a few minutes and I could feel my heart channeling just the light that's coming through it and there was there's there's no substitute for it there's no substitute for it with I could be given somebody all the beautiful comfortable things in the world which I will appreciate and cherish but it can't replace the inner when your heart is the Bikdash and the big B mikdash is reflected in the small B mikdash and suddenly you have this inner peace and serenity of knowing not only that you matter but you experience yourself not you say to yourself oh I matter I matter that doesn't do it it's the experience of the heart flowing with there's no ego there there's no defense ensiveness there. There's no trying to prove a point there. It's just isness in the deepest space where you're in flow. That exactly is what they're describing. You cannot get any other because all the other if it's not this of bringing yourself back to source by opening up and cracking open nothing. There's not even a close second to it. And that's why we come now to yo. This is the connection to ya. And here we come to the last point. If you look at the last source in the zar takes the whole story and says it's all a metaphor for life. Who is ya? Says y is the soul. Everybody has a soul. It's called it comes into the body. That's the boat. The world is like the ocean. It's pretty intense. And without a boat, I can't swim in the ocean forever. I'm going to sink. So the body holds up the nishama. And the nishama travels through the world in its body, in its gofay. Why is he called ya? You know what the word ya means in Hebrew? >> A dove. But it comes from another word. Anybody knows? You know what isim? Huh? Deception, mistreatment, deception. The Torah says, don't fool your friend. Don't deceive your friend. Don't dupe your friend. That's called in this world. The soul easily gets duped. It gets deceived. So y has two opposite things. One is a dove. Doves represent loyalty and dedication. It's one of the only birds and animals in the world that have monogamous loyal relationships throughout their life. Meaning most animals you have a choice. But with doves they remain loyal to their mate. There's a special dedication and love that the dove represents. The same word yo also comes word which means deceiving. So the z says because that's the story of the soul. Ya comes into the body and he's there and very often he can be deceived by life. What's the deception? Instead of the soul knowing it's not made out of money, it's not made of ego. It's not made of getting validation. The soul is not made up of control. Its chemistry is not made up of that. Its chemistry is alsin. So you could throw everything at it. It's like this doesn't do it. But the body tells the soul and the world tells the soul. No, this is how you get your simka. So I try this and I try this. And it can even be again in a religious context. I'm living in a from community. I'm doing the right things. I have a beautiful house. It's going to be a sukus. But my heart space is closed because again I'm trying to use Hashem and use TA and use mitzvah to be able to feel good about this wound itself without letting go without really really letting go. And I don't even know anything else cuz this is what everybody does, right? And I look at my sisters, I may look at my mother, I may look at this one and they're all having and they all seem happy. So you just may be a little more authentic. You may be a little more sensitive. That's why you ended up here in this class. You may be a little more curious. You may see through more. But it's really never about anybody else. If we go to other people, we're again going out of the space internally. When the heart is channeling the source, the soul is not being deceived. It knows exactly what sim is. And you can't replace it. And 247 I could go. I know with myself I some I want to get distracted and I want to go to that place but no I'm being deceived. I'm being duped. It's like you know sometimes I'm hungry and I see a piece of food and it's good and I eat it because of a weak moment but 10 minutes later I know I just deceived myself. It was not good. It was toxic. And the same is true with thoughts and words and behaviors 247 is not a curse. It's a gift. It means I could choose connection 247. People think is like a curse. You always have to connect to Hashem. GIVE ME A BREAK. I want vacation. Everybody has vacation. Give me a break. I CONNECT WITH YOU ENOUGH, RIGHT? Is not a curse. It's a gift. It means I can always be alive. That's a pretty good gift. I can always choose to be alive. I could choose connection. I could choose heart openness. That's not a curse. It's a gift. I can also choose the other way. AND IT'S HARD sometimes to choose life because it means I'm disciplined. It means I'm present. It means I'm not distracting myself. Yeah, sometimes it's easy to take a phone and be 2 hours on uh I don't know on Netflix or some other thing. And two hours I'm not thinking I'm dead, dumb, deaf, blind. I was just entertained. But you know, after the two hours the heart didn't open up because we know right away know the difference. It's it's it's a very very subtle but very very profound difference between the two. So I can easily be duped in life ya or I could choose dedication and love which is also yina and that's the story of ya and he has to go through a lot. He ends up ultimately in the sea and he ends up being swallowed up by fish which in za represents excessive intimacy and over there he finds god then he gets spit out. It's a whole process of ya. So now what happens with Yina? Ya is the one who essentially runs away from God. What does that look like? This is the whole story. When the lower water stops crying and says, "Why am I crying? Why am I crying? This is it." In other words, it's running away from Hashem. You can't run away from Hashem. We try. Running away from Hashem doesn't necessarily mean I run to Hawaii or to Alaska or to New Zealand. First of all, over there there's also Kabad, they're going to find you. But that's geographically. That's maybe if you go to Mars. It could be Mars today also. [laughter] But I'm talking here a different type of running away. There's running away physically, running away emotionally. Running away emotionally means somehow I want to take the lower water and detach it and say YOU'RE NOT LOWER. YOU ARE THE higher water. Instead of feeling the tension and using the tension as a catalyst for growth, I say, "You know what? I'm done. There's no tension anymore." And I start worshiping the lower water. That's what it means. I run away from Hashem. I run away from Hashem. Means I run away from the truth. That reality is one and that I am a humble servant and that I don't have a separate existence. It's not easy to stay in that. SO, I RUN away from it. I'm like, "I'm done with you. I'm done with you." AND ALL THE CALCULATIONS NICE BUT NOW I need my own little ego space or insecurity space and that's the space where I want to live that's y it got d he got duped the zer says what happened he came to and he healed he got the same y what happened at he saw it all he saw the clarity he saw that all the pain all the confusion all the anxiety all the separateness everything that was going on all the years. It was the crying. It was the lower waters crying. Not because he's really separate, because separateness is unnatural. At he got the healing. He saw what it's all about. He saw that the separation was only created in order for the person with their own initiative and choice and courage and power to bring it all back. So ya the same ya experiences the divine inspiration not despite his previous life because of his previous life his entire life his entire life experience somehow comes together now because now there is meaning in all the separation there's meaning in all the tension everything you're working through everything that's happening people struggle sometimes with a lot of stuff for a lot of years it's not separation it's working through the oneness in your separation it's bringing hashem into every fiber of our being. That means I need to work through this part of my life and these emotions in my life and this experience in my life. And everybody has a different life story. It's to bring the the lower water back, but this time with an unprecedented force that comes only from the separation that is then reunited because there's no joy like the unity that comes from two best soulmates, inseparable friends that were then fragmented and separated and then they come back. But they really really come back. Now they own the friendship. Now you know that it's really really you. When you're one with Hashem, you may just be a PRODUCT OF ONENESS BECAUSE NOBODY EVER asked you. When you're separated and then you come back, that means you own this oneness. That means you really, really one. How do you know two people are really friends? Yeah. Rabbi writes this. How do you know people are really friends? When they're close together, they grew up together. Okay. When they get into a crazy fight [laughter] and they become separated and everything in the world is saying never ever reconnect. But something inside of them pains them and they're drawn to each other and they reconnect. You see the disconnection was who they are in their essence and no circumstances could separate them. Even in a marriage, a marriage is always as deep as the ability of couples to deal with a real argument. If couples always agree with each other, it's amazing if you have such a marriage. Okay, I don't mean to disturb that. But let's face it, probably one of you is not being completely honest or just shutting down. Because if a husband and a wife are both in their full personality presence and they're both Jewish, [laughter] there's going to be differences and sometimes profound differences. Can they come out when they can come out and they can even create a wedge? And yet, not only you survive that, but in a way that can bring you even closer because you can come with your authenticity and you can say, "You know what? We really choose to be with each other. We're not forced to be with each other. We're choosing to be with each other knowing the differences. There's no deeper connection. When the soul is in heaven, it's one with Hashem. It's one. It becomes separate. It has every reason to get distracted, to get overwhelmed, to go search other simas. And then it's but it's searching. It's searching. Something is not good. And on sukas finally, it breaks through. It cracks open. And the water comes back to be poured under that. That's the greatest sim where you finally own that relationship. You own that oneness. You own the lack of ego. You own being really really connected to the source. And then the heart pounds from that celebration of a celebration of your truest truest essence being reclaimed by you in a way that can never be separated. And knowing that within all the darkness, it was there whole time. And all the darkness was only a method and an opportunity to be able to work through it and to be able to reclaim it. Now finally when we want to bring this home in a very practical way you say how do we do this? Yeah. What does this mean? What's the homework of this class? As you asked before people are cleaning and people are sweeping and mopping and cooking and and all the all the all the stuff. [snorts] So I think at least one aspect of it of course you know every person's life is different and we all need to apply it in a very personal and intimate way but I think a very very important thing is that when it comes these days every morning because morning is a time that we're up we're fresh you could dedicate some time literally to to to to live in this space what does it mean to live in this space to live in this space you see in the morning the bash says that the first thoughts that we have in the morning the first thought affect the whole day it's like the opening of the day how we set the tone so the way you start your day is so so important for this space if I could spend time in the morning to really sit with my when I say in the morning you say pause take it in this is not fiction this is real this is the real real thing a lot of things are happening but what's the most real thing what's the Most the real thing in the world is love. The most real thing in the world is connection. The deepest thing in the world is the fact that you're one with Hashem. That counts more than anything else. What the BMP used to call us. Dus is the core, the beginning and the end of everything. Veus. Veus means connection, oneness, attachment. That's our deepest need. That's our deepest desire. Attachment. And the attachment begins with me and me. Attachment. I can't be attached with people if I'm still did not find my attachment needs met in my own soul because then I'm looking for people. I need you to do this and say this and say this and what if my wife doesn't say this and what if my husband doesn't say this? I'm going to be a wreck for the rest of the day. Of course, it's great when people can give us the validation and the feedback that we love. But it starts off with knowing who you are. Can I really know who I am? Can I really know what I'm looking for? What is my deepest deepest deepest need? And I know that sometimes comes with a lot of pain. It could come with a lot of pain because of different disappointments in life. And yet to say in all this pain, I'm not alone. I'm not lonely. I'm not just separate water that's just looking for something to numb it. No, I know the pain because I'm looking for real attachment. I'm looking for real real connection. And I can also watch all the other parts in me that are making me crazy and are trying to shle me in a thousand directions. It's not like when you go into this space, everything else silences. Levi. It doesn't happen that way. If you can get there, fine. But very, very likely, there's going to be another two or three voices that might say like this. Stop fooling yourself. Stop lying to yourself. You know how messed up you are. [laughter] You know it doesn't work. You know this. And generally, you know what time it is and you're late again. Oh, you're never on time. You don't even know how TO GET YOUR LIFE TOGETHER. WHY CAN'T YOU learn from your neighbors? Oh, a half an hour later. Whoa. Watch all of this. Watch all of this. Everyone is saying something because they're trying to protect you. You know, these are all our different parts that are very very active because they're trying to protect you from embarrassment or from shame or from whatever. I can watch all of that and then with kindness and compassion hold space for it, but then also go a little deeper like lean a little deeper into the heart and say, "What is it really? What are you really really really looking for? If this person says something nice to me, that will be the beginning and the end of all my sorrows. It's dispossession. It's that possession. And the truth is, you're looking for yourself. You're looking for Hashem. And I lean into that. And I surrender. I surrender into trust. It doesn't mean I'm lazy. It doesn't mean I'm not going to cook. It doesn't mean I'm not going to build my suka. It doesn't mean I'm going to sit on my couch and do nothing. No, it means I want to be energized not from a place of death. I want to be energized from a place of life. I don't want to be energized. Go do this. Go do this. Go do that. And then I'm freaking out. I want to be energized from a place of connection. I'm going to cook. Why am I cooking? Really? Why am I cooking? I'm cooking because I want validation. I'm cooking because the food has to taste perfect. So they should say, "I never ate such rib steak in my life. I never ate such rib steak in my life. Really? Why am I cooking? I can ask myself that question. Can I find my oneness with Hashem in the cooking? And then you know what? Maybe then I can let go of a few things. Maybe then I don't have to I don't mean to mix into anybody's kitchen, but sometimes people they cook to perfection. They need every conceivable dip in the world sometimes. But if you could focus on the fact I'm doing this for my connection with Hashem. I'm doing this because I find this to be a privilege to be able to bring joy of love and nurture to my family and to myself. It becomes a different type of experience. I could sometimes let go of things. I could sometimes not be perfect. I could sometimes buy certain things if it doesn't have seed oil. [snorts] If it has seed oil then uh then it's an issue at least the way they say it by me in my circles >> but you'll figure that out. I could buy certain things. I can delegate certain things. And the same is true with everything else. And therefore you don't abandon yourself in the process. Abandoning people themselves in the process doesn't help a family. You think anybody's children or grandchildren want to see a mother or grandmother sukus who's depleted, exhausted, and deep down they feel how heavy the yumptiff is and wishing it would have never happened. Nobody wants that. People would rather less food and more presents. I know that's not a Jewish thing to say, but it's true. Ask your children, do they want more of the heart space of their mother and less food or perfect food better than a five-star hotel, but mommy is depleted, exhausted, stressed out, and pretty angry? Ask any child in the world. And may they may not even say it, but everybody knows the answer. Everybody knows the answer. So say, "Well, we can't have both. If if I want TO BE RELAXED, THERE'S NO FOOD. Everybody's starving a whole sukas." Then they certainly won't be happy. Okay? I'm not trying to suggest that your house should have no [laughter] nothing. What I'm trying to say is the food is an expression of self, not the other way around. Work in a home and work with a family. All of us, it's first is to be present. You're channeling Hashem's energy in the world. That's what you'll give to people more than anything. I promise you. You can make a 100 potato cougles to zing and zag. And I'm sure you make a potato cougall. Yeah. You know how to make a potato cougle. Yeah. like to zing and sagen. Unbelievable. And I'm sure whoever eats it will say, but that piss lasts for three and a half seconds. Maybe for 10 seconds, maybe for 3 minutes. Your heart space lasts a lifetime. It lasts a lifetime. That's where everybody wants to invest. That's the relationship field. Now everyone as mature adults we have to figure out how to do this in a more efficient effective way. It always helps when in the morning you dedicate some time 10 minutes a half an hour 45 minutes whether it's ding learning taking a walk listening to such types of classes learning but in a way that you could connect you can nurture that part of you and then when I show up yeah I have to do a lot of things today we have to do a lot of things today but why am I doing it I don't have to prove myself to anybody I'm not looking for anybody's validation I'm not trying to be perfect I'm not trying to impress somebody I'm not trying to score points I want to be a a messenger, an ambassador of Hashem to be able to connect the higher waters and the lower waters to the point that they fuse. And then the in our own heart, it takes all the sim in the world and it elevates all of them because they all become part of your attachment and connection. Have an amazing, beautiful, uplifted, joyous, serene, tranquil, extraordinary, blessed Yamf. Have a beautiful day. >> That's my That's the stress today.