Tisha B'av 2026: Why 2,000 Years of Tears Give Us Hope | Rabbi Mordechai Becher - Living Inspired

Welcome back to the podcast. My name is Aaron Sul and you're watching Pasha Inspired. I'm here with Rabbi Morai Becker. Rabb Becker, welcome. Thank you for joining us. >> Pleasure to be here. Thank you. >> With Tishabove coming up, Tishabove has morphed into a time where people watch videos uh on the B mikdash on tikonidos on working on. But I wanted perhaps to start the conversation with the Mishna that says five things happened on tishabove. And the first one is that it was decreed on the Jewish people not to enter Eritz. So the Eros is like the center part of Tishabove. So what can you tell us about Tishabove and how we can fix this? I'm happy you started with that because um the gamarra in Tarnis and also in Sanhedrin tells us um it it frames that original decree when the Jewish people heard the spies come back and say it's hopeless. We cannot conquer Israel. The people there are too overwhelming. The land is too difficult etc. We know that the Jews, it says they heard what the spy says and they cried and they cried. The whole community cried and the response of Hashem was as the Gomorrah puts it. You cried a tears or crying that was unnecessary, unwarranted. I will give you something to cry about on this night. And so it's it is type of interesting that it's almost the the the uh punishment the crying uh that we experienced throughout history and that we still experience today is based on the fact that the Jews cried back then. And yet what the expectation of us seems to be that we should cry right that we should cry when we read the kino when we read that's that's normal and and it says in the scroll of a written by yahu bala you shall cry and cry that night and as the medra says cry over the first temple cry over the second temple and there's so much to cry over on tishabove there is the as as you mentioned First of all, the the decree on the Jewish that generation not to go to Israel, destruction of the first temple, the first Bamikdash. um the destruction of the second basikdash and by the way the first bas yes the destruction of the bas mikdash there also estimates hard to estimate populations at that time but we think about 100,000 Jews died during that war with the Babylonians and the exile of the uh the the southern kingdom to Babylon to Iraq um later on the destruction of the second basdash by the Romans under Titus Bespasian Um, so again, hard to make estimates here, but it's estimated that maybe 2 million or so Jews died as a result of war, famine, and disease. A million Jews exiled all over the Roman Empire. Um, hundreds of thousands of Jews sold as slaves um to the Romans. I think Paul Johnson in his history of the Jews says that the the price of slaves radically dropped in the Roman Empire because there were so many Jews on the market as slaves. Jews killed, tortured, gladatorial gangs, pagan celebration. I mean, it just goes on and on. And then it didn't stop. The Brava revolt, which was for 2 and a half years successful, but destroyed. Betar, the city of Betar, destroyed, thousands killed, Romans brought in extra legions in in 130s uh 2 century CE. Uh we have Turnis Rufus plowing over the site of the Basam Mikdash building aliyah Capitolina. Whether that caused the Barova revolt or was a result of it is unclear, debated by historians. The expulsion of Jews from England 1290. Tishab the uh declaration of the first crusade in 1096 was in um around Tishab. I can't confirm that it actually was but around tishab and that resulted of course and we know in terrible tragedies the inquisition the or not the inquisition but the expulsion of Jews from from the Iberian peninsula 1492 from Spain 1497 from Portugal but in 1492 the Alhhamra decree was actually that the Jews would leave Spain and it was tishabove that we had to leave Britain and Russia um declare war on Germany in the first world war that was on Tishab 1914 and deportations to from the Warsaw ghetto to Trebinka began on in 1942 on Tishabove. So the list goes on and on and and we and it's it it's impossible. I don't know if it's impossible but it's difficult not to cry about all of these and of course we know in more recently although not tishabove but we have a lot to cry over over the past 2 and a half years. So on the one hand we have this national day of mourning. We cry and and we have event we have this whole buildup to it. Okay. And it's type of interesting Rabio Solvatic points out and Rushlam officer and others that there is a a reverse um in the order of mourning an intensity from private individual mourning like if a person lies a close relative. So the most intense morning is from the time of death until burial known as aninus which even overrides various positive commandments and it's very intense. Then you've got the next period starts from burial. It's called shiva the seven days which is intense but less intense than aninus. And then there's the 30 days schlloim which is less intense than the seven. And then you've got the year for parents and then it's got to it's your site. So it goes from intense to less intense. Whereas in the case of mourning for the basikdash it's the opposite. We go from yearly and general remembrances and then we come to Shivas Saba Tamas 17th of Tamas which begins the intense period of three weeks which actually intensifies with rash kodesh the first day of the month of Av and it intensifies with the week in which tishaba falls this week and it intensifies with tishab itself and the explanation given is that um slightly phrased a little differently by Rabio Bear and by Rashma Fishischer, but saying very similar ideas. It's a a a um mourning which is intense and personal and close. Um you don't need to be built up to it. You don't need to. The intensity is already there naturally and hence the the the the goal of halah is to allow that morning to be expressed but on the other hand to transition us back to life. Hence most intense and less intense. In the case of tishabove it's distant and a lot of the things are distant and in the past and it's not so easy to build up that type of feeling of mourning for it. And so the halaka builds it up for us and and helps us come to that intensity. So but the goal is that we should cry. The goal is that we should mourn. And and yet this crying that we cried initially was wrong. And uh so there's a few different views but let me let me just start with the go of vna says that the word crying uh is related to the word which means confusion as in pharaoh said of the Jews they are closed up confused and and um confusion tears ears for example make you make your vision blurry can't see so well it's like you confusion so um so that crying was a crying of despair where the Jews couldn't see a way out they felt that there was they're hopeless there you know they believed that there was no way they could conquer Israel they believed there was no way they could enter that land and uh and you know the punishment fits the crime time so to speak that and and indeed they were not allowed in but that was a crying which was a crying of despair but there's a different type of crying the tears that we cry on tishab it's not despair it's sorrow and mourning for what has occurred and what's still occurring for us but mixed in with that there is also an element of hope because and here's how Schlomma Fisher expresses it. He says a a um a a tree, a branch, a a seed which is completely completely dry. It has no moisture whatsoever. It has no it's it's it's basically petrified. You can't replant it. It's not going to grow. He says, "The tears the Jewish people have been crying over the past 2,000 years, they are the deusa, the moisture of life that indicates that we're not dead, we're not fossilized, we're not petrified, we are alive." So there's a certain element and a breast says that every every time we cry there should also be it's classic breast but there should be some sim involved in that hard to understand where's the simka in crying over the tragedies that that and I didn't list all the tragedies that we cry about I just listed a few of them right but all those tragedy we cry about I think that the sima is that if we're crying that means we're life. If we're crying, it means the Jewish people are still alive and kicking. We're not we're not petrified. There was a uh historian by the name of Arnold Toinby, infamous um he wrote a book, I think it's it's called I don't remember the exact title, the rise and fall of 27 civilizations. I think it's called eight volumes. Um and he coined the phrase a fossil civilization. He wrote this in the 1940s I think it was and he to he called the Jews a fossil civilization and he says and he was very much against establishment of a state of Israel. He didn't feel he felt that the Jews are on the way out. They're they're they're fossilized. They'll they'll they you know that's it. It's over. Aban in an amazing speech Israeli diplomat uh in a amazing speech he he put it this way. He says he says the fossil civilization is at the core of Toyby's heresy although he fails to prove this point and he calls the Jews a fossilized civilization and if we are fossils then we have no right to self-determination. The pursuit of a country is a grotesque distortion. He says, however, he says, the fossils, not having read the eight volumes of Toyinbee's history, remain unaware of their own petrification and continue to function as living beings. So, I don't think any of our audience, I can't say for sure, has read eight volumes of Arnold Toybe's history, but none of us see ourselves as fossils. That I can guarantee. Fossils don't cry. Petrified creatures don't mourn. So our cry, our our tears back in the desert were tears of despair. It's over. But our tears on tishabove are tears of sorrow, but intermingled with a sense of hope and a sense that we that that we are still mourning. So it means we're still alive. And and as we all know very famously, Yakov, our ancestor, our patriarch, refused to be consoled for the loss of Ysef. And the Talmud tells us Rashi quotes it because there's a decree that something dead is going to be forgotten eventually. Otherwise, how could people move on? The fact that he could not be consoled for Ysef, his son, was evidence that he wasn't dead. evidence that Ysef wasn't dead because because he couldn't be reconciled. They couldn't they couldn't comfort the father. Now the fact is the Jewish people we cannot be comforted as one of the kinot says how can we be comforted with with with comfort of of vanity of nothing I can't be comforted but that's there's there's a the negative side of that is the sorrow that we feel and the mourning that we experience and the tears the but the the positive side of that is that that which me which we mourn for and cry for is not dead because otherwise we would have forgotten about it centuries ago. And so there is an intermingling of that of that joy of that awareness. It's it's muted on tishabove. It's muted but it but it's there. It's there. And uh that's why after midday on on taba we have a the laws of mourning become a little less right we uh we we we don't have to sit on the ground right anymore we uh um men put on talis and fillain in at min you know soon right after you know the midday I mean afternoon service and and so on. So, and the idea there is that we that we have an understanding that that that those tears are not only tear they're not tears of despair. They're tears of sorrow intermingled with hope and some optimism and a belief that we're alive and kicking. And that's I think Ravnakman actually points out in Lutan that that crying is rash is an acronym out of order but it's an acronym for yagul. In you we rejoice every day. in God we we we rejoice. That that's it's type of interesting um that idea and and you know um I remember Mosher Shapiro pointing out you know if you look in the Gamarra Gmorra is written in Aramaic as is the Zohar as is the medish. slight differences in the Aramaic, but one of the fascinating differences is that in the um in the Gmorra, when the Gmorra wants to bring evidence for something, it wants you to hear a logical argument, it says to Schma, come and listen. Toshma, come and listen. Right? I'm going to give you some logic. I'm going to give you some evidence and you'll evaluate that. The style of the Talmud is exactly that. evaluating evidence, argumentation, logic in the zohor, mystical text of Judaism. Uh the expression uses to kaz which means come and see from the expression kazon. We just we just had come and see the vision of right. So to say come and see. So so it's interesting because the the the Zohar is is saying that that we're giving you a a vision. It's not necessarily going to be a step-by-step logical argumentation in the Talmudic form is going to be where you can you can see something. And another factor another feature sorry in the zor is very often you see someone will ask a question of I remember in paras pinas uh so someone asked him why did Jews sway when they pray starts crying this is not uncommon that he's asked a question he cries and he gives the answer there's a lot of crying in this and and uh I I I I think if I remember correctly, Raosha pointed out that the crying obscures the physical vision, but it allows a greater clarity in a spiritual sense that sometimes because the physical vision all what you see is surrounded by enemies, anti-semitism everywhere, blood liels, terrorists every it's it's it's not a good thing to it, right? you look at the world. So when you cry, there's an obscuring of the physical vision and the spiritual vision is able to see beyond that that we have hope that we have we are alive that we have promises of redemption and that Hashem is fulfilling them. So that's what that's another thing that tears do. they obscure the physical vision and maybe allow us a little bit to see that in fact there's a very famous everyone quotes it I mean not everyone but it's frequently quoted that the kadush leitzkadich uh would say that the that the shabas um before tishab called kazon shabas kazon he says is a reference to the fact not only that the ha Torah the portion of the prophets starts with the word kazon vision but he says also is because on that shabas because yes it's in the middle of the days of mourning but we don't express our mourning on shabas right he says it therefore it's like this quasi state of like a schroing's cat type situ where where where you have a kazon every everyone can experience a vision of the redemption, right? We have in the midst of the tears of the nine days of the week that falls in, right? In the midst of that, but technically Shabas cannot be in the midst of the but but in the midst of the nine days, right? in the midst of that morning we have this we have a kazon we can have a vision and a glimpse of that future and and I think that's one idea that we have to keep in mind for tishab that our tears and our crying is sorrow for the pain and and and identification with the pain that Jews have experienced and continue to experience but it's also a type of a of a crying that That involves also because we know that sometimes people cry at great at at moments of joy and and revolvic in his book out of the whirlwind points out he says human emotions are very complex. He says you can come to a marriage your own marriage marriage of a children and we cry. He says, he says, marriage is like the the human attempt to outwit mortality, to go into the future. He says, so while we're celebrating that, but there's a bit of a reminder of mortality as well, right? We're celebrating your child gets married, you're celebrating that, but there's also a bit of a they're they're leaving home. They're they're leaving the nest, so to speak, right? There's there's very often a mixture of emotions. He says that's not unusual. Halaka and the Torah recognizes that that that we have that we're not, you know, just one emotion at a time, right? That's just that's it, right? No such thing. Humans have a mixture of and so so so yes tishab is a time of mourning and it's a time of sorrow but but you know with the kinois we actually end on a positive note with the kinois we uh we we we end with a positive note in a right um the uh and even the tunes the traditional at least ashkanazi tunes of kinot at the very end are I I mean I find very uplifting thing and I'm not a lit who loves a you know so I mean but I find a also beautiful beautiful tune but and but there's a component in it and you know there's there's a very beautiful idea of Schlomma Carabach composed a song based on a a puk a verse in in Tahillim that we say uh before benching on shabas and yontimu now normally we would read that asima those who sew who plant in tears will harvest in joy. When you plant with tears you harvest with joy. Rashalaba's song as he explained I once heard um he explain I heard him explaining it um he sings it as bad in other words he's got the comma after barina then it says he sorrow he explained those who sow who plant with tears bina in joy yikuru will harvest. He says it's possible to have some rea some joy even in the tears because if the tears are tears of despair and hopelessness as it was in the first tishabove that's a problem that's going to cause tragedy as it did back then. But if the tears the dimmer is barina is with an idea that we understand that this is bringing us closer to redemption that we have a promise of redemption that we have a certainty of redemption that's that's we will be able to harvest. I remember Shapiro uh saying that you know uh we cover our eyes when we say Israel hero Israel Lord is our God lord is one universal Jewish custom cover the eyes when you say that why you ask most people the answer again anecdotal evidence I have not done a survey I don't have statistical evidence for the statistitians I know my son and wife both are statisticians so you know they're going to but but okay but not statisticians my I teach statistics, my son has studied. Okay. But um I think people I have asked when I asked them why we cover our eyes, the response is greater focus, better concentration. Could be that's very very possible. Two other explanations. One explanation is that that sometimes that maybe we cover our eyes because the world I see with my physical eyes and the world I understand with my spiritual belief etc. there's a disparity. There's a disparity. So I cover my eyes and I'm just trying to focus on the the world of of my amuna of my belief etc. and do not let the the physical vision distract me from that. That's one possibility. Raosha Shapiro explained a little differently. He said the the purpose here is not the covering but it's the uncovering. Meaning as you say here, O Israel, the Lord is our God, Lord is one. Hashem, Hashem is one. The oneness of Hashem. He says, now we uncover our eyes and we are seeing the world differently than before. before we accepted that idea that that that belief. He says, "A person who believes in the oneness of God, person who believes that Hashem chose the Jewish people, Schma Israel, the person who believes Hashem, Hashem is our God, our national covenant with him, the person who believes that Hashem, that Hashem is one, there's no other power beyond him." Such a person looks at the world in a very different way. He says, "So we cover our eyes as we accept that. Then we uncover our eyes. It's the uncovering which is the significant part." Fascinating idea. We uncover our eyes as if to say now I'm looking at a different world. >> Beautiful world. The view of a of of a mam of a believer is a different view. >> On tishabove on just like yum kipper if we just fast and we don't repent it's kind of a wasted opportunity because the purpose of fasting was to show sincerity in our repentance. So you know crying alone on tishabove without recognizing like for instance in the desert our failed opportunity. We had the opportunity of redemption. We were at the doorstep of Israel and we said nah we'd rather go back to Egypt. We don't really want to take the next step and we were afraid of that connection with God. So maybe you can speak on after we've awakened and these all these messages that we do on tishabar to awaken to to shock us to get us we want to look into history of the Jewish people and say what a miracle as well as what a tragedy both at the same time like you said they're they're both the nama and the crying is it's it's all inter intertwined but what's our next step so our next step is a good question we know that um after the three weeks So if you look at what the sages decreed for the next step are the next seven weeks of hafturas which are known as the shiva the seven hauras of comfort and seven as we know is the number of creation the the seven days of creation. So we're trying to recreate ourselves a new the first manifestation of this new period of what we're supposed to do is ta the 15th of a the Rambam says something amazing in his commentary on the Mishna at the end of mass tarnis the uh Gmorra has I think six or seven six seven I don't remember what but um I think it was maybe seven um explanations of why the 15th of A is such a happy date we all know ta and I don't know no singles events etc ta it's a happy time so one of the explanations is and this is actually what you started with is that the decree that that generation should not enter Israel when did the Jews realize that was over in their last year in the desert on the 15th above and there's a medish that says you know people would go out every every tish every nth of that day of the decree they dig graves for themselves. They'd lie in the graves and by morning they'd be dead every year. Um and um on the last year they went out and did that and they didn't die. Now at that point you'd think that they'd realize it was over. The decree is over. We're alive. >> No. You know what they thought? We we made a calculation mistake. We have an error in the calendar. So they went out again next night. And it was by the 15th of the month lying in the desert looking up at the sky. What are you going to see? A full moon. It becomes obvious and apparent that there is no mistake. We're at the 15th of the month and we're still alive. So the Rambam says this I'm quoting not from the original Arabic but from the translation in the uh in the in the that's in the Gmorra there are slight differences in but the way it's translated is it says at that point they trusted in their souls and they believed in themselves they felt the desire of the creator form and the end of his anger with them. So the Rambam implies doesn't imply it he says it that the joy of the 15th above the step next step after tishabove is they believed in themselves they believed in the they trusted in themselves and they felt God's love. So and and Raosha Shapiro quoted that and he said those seven weeks of building till we get to the new world rashashana beginning of the world those seven weeks of building starts with a belief in the self and a belief in the Jewish people they believed in themselves and he quotes from the which says God is described in the Torah in parasu I think it is or or I forget a god is described as a god of of faith. Strange thing to describe God as a god of faith would so the says he he believed in his world and created it. So you cannot create without belief. You're not going to invest if you don't have confidence. So, Hashem has confidence and belief in us in us. We have to have belief in ourselves and our belief in self means not just me personally, right? That I have to have but belief not just in God but belief in the Jewish people. That is part of our amuna that the Jewish people have the capability. So, how can that manifest itself? Investing our time and our efforts in the Jewish people. investing our time and efforts in in in our growth and etc etc because I can't build if I don't have that faith and having that faith in ourselves and in the Jewish people central to this growth the next step from from from tishaba right which again as I mentioned is inherent I believe in the crying of tishab is that element of faith it's just that that is the the the major emotion on tishab is sorrow and pain. But there's a hidden dimension of hope. When we transition to the 15th of AV, the major emotion, the major component is hope. The major component, the dominant is is is belief in ourselves and belief in the Jewish people. That's what we have to have. This is uh hopefully the last tishabove. Hopefully this year uh like the prophet says the fifth fast will turn into a day of rejoicing.