The Spiritual Danger Nobody Talks About - Rabbi Shlomo Farhi

There was a rabbi uh his name was Sar Shalom. He was one of the Belerbies and he heard about this unbelievable rabbi whose name was the Jose Lublin and uh he was one of one of the greats of the era. He lived in the city of Lublin at the time and he very much wanted to go and learn with this rabbi but he had his own rabbi. He didn't want his rabbi to be upset. So he figured you know what I'll go introduce myself for a day or two. My rabbi won't realize that I went. he won't be insulted and I'll at least have the chance to meet this great rabbi and and connect with him. Travels all the way to Lublin. Um he gets to the rabbi's residence and shock and horror the they tell him that the rabbi is not having is not accepting any visitors. He feels very bad. He's traveled all the way. So he figures he needs to find out where and when the rabbi is going to start accepting visitors. So he asks around, people tell him the only person that could know such a thing is his close student um the uh the uh great rabbi from Bishka. Okay. He goes to the rabbi. He tells him, "Listen, I came all this way just to see the the is there any way that you could tell me when you know he's not accepting visitors now? What's the story?" So the rabbi tells him, and listen to this, it's unbelievable. He said the rabbi only welcomes people as a sadik. People are coming to him as a sadik. He therefore has to be a sadik. But if, god forbid, for whatever reason, he feels like he's done a sin and he's no longer a sadik, how can he welcome people in? How can he give them blessings? He's looking at this man. He said, "Uh, okay. What does that mean?" He said, "Does that mean that the rabbi did a sin?" He said, "Yes, the rabbi did a sin." He says, "What kind of sin did the rabbi do?" This rabbi looks at him and he says, "Look, I could see you're a very serious person. You're a holy person and you're coming to seek, you know, and not just to uh gaze around." He says, "I could reveal to you the avon, the a of the rabbi." He He broke a positive and a negative commandment. I remember I'm reading the story. I was like, "Oh, this is juicy. What's going on over here? He's got the New York Post up in here. TMZ. Let's go." Right. Shocking expose. What's the sin that the rabbi committed? Positive and negative. He said the says sorry be careful lest you forget Hashem your God and you shall remember Hashem your God. The rabbi feels not that he abandoned God, but that there was a moment that he forgot he wasn't actively thinking of. So the rabbi feels terrible. Be careful. You should not forget your god. You need to remember. There was a moment that he was thinking about something else and God was not in his thoughts. So how could he see anybody if he's not a sadik anymore now he's a rash first of all I mean look look what kind of sadik we're talking about that this is how he categorizes himself as not being a sadik I want your while you still have not done yet like you know I still that's like the highest level of anyone you ever met in your life but that's how these felt he was very upset and until he did tisha he couldn't see anybody The rabbi, the son of Shalom tells this m this student, he says, "Please, so maybe he's not letting people in to give bara, but can I maybe just tell him something or introduce myself? I'm not going to ask him for a bara." So he doesn't need to see me as a sadik. He says, "Okay, if you want to go in, yeah, on your own, go in on your own at your own risk." He opens the door, pushes this young rabbi in, and he shuts the door often. And I think he was scared of the to know. Rabbi walks in and the sitting there, you could see he's upset. And he says, "Can I help you? What are you doing here? I'm not seeing you." He says, "I just wanted to share something with the rabbi." He says, "This is who I am. And let me share with you." And he he quotes to him a Mishna. seemingly at first glance non sequ is the mitzvah of leaving over the corner of your field. The corners of the field they would leave for the poor to be able to have. It's one of the the many gifts that a Jewish person is obligated to give to the poor. So p is the corner. Okay, that's why these are called pot because they are on the corner of uh of a person's head says says the shalom to the rabbi. I want to just share with you a Mishnah. What does a Mishnah say the has two and he forgot it? That's not considered. Okay. So the Omar is called so after the amount which is an amount of the Omr. Okay. That's how much it is. So says the says the Mishna in that has two in it if he forgot it. It's not considered as if you forgot the what's the reason why it's not considered like you forgot it says the because you're going to remember it's something which is important enough to you that amount that you're not going to forget about it and let it slip from your memory forever. Even if you've forgotten it, you've only forgotten it for an instant. your mind is going to come back to it because it definitively is something that's very important to you. And what do we learn from the Mishna? He says to the rabbi, we learn that if a person forgets something that's very important to him, but he's going to remember it momentarily, it's not considered as if he forgot it at all. I'll give you an example. If you've ever had children in your life and you're standing at the bottom of the stairs or there's your kids are sitting at the dining room table and you're looking at them and you're like, "Uh, David, Sarah, that's not that you don't know. You did not forget your children's name. You just as a parent haven't slept since 1980, right? Would anyone say that that means that you don't know your child's name?" It's a momentary uh blip, but that's not considered that's not considered forgetting. So the the the he concluded and he said, "If I was to forget Hashem, maybe that could be called forgetting." But for a rabbi of your caliber to forget God for a split second when he's on your mind constantly so much so that you think that thinking about something else and not having God at the forefront of your mind consists of forgetting for you that's not called forgetting. He brought tremendous comfort to the Lublin and he said to him, "Anytime you're in Lublin, my door will always be open for you." This is the story. But I believe it communicates with us this concept of thinking about God. In fact, there's a mitzvah and it's called one of the mitzvot. What is a mitzvah? a mitzvah which is all kinds. There are six mitzvoteshot that a person is doing every minute of every day. How could you be doing a mitzvah every minute of every day? How is that possible? There's other things that you're doing. The six things, as my rabbi explained, are six levels of awareness. Okay? And if you ever forget them or you want to remember them, someone wrote a song about the six mitzvah. And if you play it in your mind, you'll be able to always recall the six the six mitzvot just from the music itself. So even till today, I haven't heard the song in years. I could see my dear friend over there maybe knows it as well. Goes >> [singing] >> to believe that there is a God and there is none other but him to consider him and to make him unique and singular in the world to love him to fear and not to turn away. Those are six mitzvot that a person is obligated in all the time. My rabbi asked, "Even if you want to tell me that I should do one mitzvah at all times, I can't then do six more, five more at all times. >> How could you ask me to do it? I mean, there's other things that I do. >> There's other things that I think So my rabbi explained that theseh mitzvot are mitzvot of awareness. So I'll give you an example. I am a married man and a father. I am a grandfather. There's no point in my day that I forget that I'm married. I don't wear a ring, right? I don't need a ring to remind me that I'm married. I never forget that I'm married. I always know it. Now, let me ask you a question. Is it hard for me to remember that I'm a father cuz I also remember that I'm married? No. Is it more difficult? Look at the levels of difficulty here. I also have to remember that I'm a grandfather and that I'm a son also a brother. Holy cow. How can I remember all these things without developing multiple personality disorder? [snorts] The answer is that these ideas are an awareness of a definition. So as an example, I don't need to remember that gravity exists. It's part of the way that I see the world. Once I understand the world through that lens, it becomes part of the way I see everything. Is that clear? Maybe what the shalom was communicating to him. Mazalto. Mazalto. Rafael David. Do you like that double I pulled out there? Right. Unbelievable. Okay, listen to this because I think it's amazing. What the shalom was saying is even in forgetting, you don't forget. When a person has that level of awareness of God's existence, I want you to understand that what that means is that is living with you at all times. And sometimes we don't realize this. My father quoted just the other day he was in the Besset and he was wrapping his tilene. He was hanging back. He was looking at his book. He sees a guy hanging out there. So he goes up to him. He says, "What are you what are you waiting here for?" He says, "Rabbi, I learned that you're not supposed to leave somebody else somebody alone in the Bet by themselves. To be alone in the Bet is dangerous." So Gimar says wild gim. We need to explain it maybe some other time. says that's where the Mala Mav keeps his keeps his uh his implements, his work tools. Very strange place. That's all, you know, you couldn't go to the FDR and you take one of the storage units. I feel like, you know, this way he needs to put it. By the way, I've searched the sh many times. I thought I could eliminate death if I could just find his khim. Then I realized he he knew I was doing that. So he moved him to another either way. So my father told him it's okay you could leave me here. He said what do you mean? My father says you can't leave someone alone in the I am never alone. does not sleep nor does he slumber. What does it mean? I know what that means. Means you don't fall, you don't sleep. You know what it means? You ever driving and do this? Yeah. You see that? Yeah. that that's it means that you're falling asleep. You're drifting. Okay? You know what that means? That amount of time of even that God does not spend apart from you. there's not even a second that God is not with you. And when a person has an awareness of then even if they're not thinking of God, they have not forgotten God. I want to take this maybe to another stage. You know tell us in the beginning of the parish, if you will but listen to my I will bless you in the most beautiful of ways. And Rashi famously says if you will but listen the word is a strange word. It should have just said it will be if you listen. What does it mean if you will only listen? Says Rashi comes from the root of the word echel. God is saying, "I want you not just to listen to me. I want you to heal." Listen. What does that mean? To heal. Listen. Explain. Even the mitzvot that a person normally steps on with his heel that people they step on with their with their heel. If you follow those mitzvot the mitzvot that are not important I'm going to give you all these question is I don't understand which mitzvot are unimportant all mitzvot are huge every mitzvah is you know there's a famous story um of two women and they made a pact between them. They were dear friends, righteous women that whoever's going to get this shamine is going to come back to their best friend and tell them what's in store. Anyway, what happens after a while? One of them passes away, come back in a dream, and her friend asks her, "What's it like?" She said, "It's amazing." She said, "Tell me, do I have a portion in Ganed?" And the woman says, "You have a portion, but our portions are so far apart, we can't even see one another." Really, we did everything together. We were like best friends attached at the hip. He says, "That's true. But there was one time when there was a person who was looking for directions and we were both helping them. >> But when we were both helping him, I lifted my finger and I showed him where we were talking about. So my place in Ghana is so far away from yours, you can't even see it. We don't understand the power, the beauty, the sakar of even the tiniest mvah. Our tell us that managed to earn the sakar to take over the whole world. Why? Because one time someone put God's name after a king's name and he said God's name should come first tiny thing. The reward was immeasurable. [clears throat] The Gimar is filled with such examples. So what does this mean that there's a mitzvah that's so small and if it's small why do you get so much reward for it? So I want to share one idea that I think is really a transformative idea. I want you to imagine, see a very wealthy person and he walks into the betet. He has in his jacket over here a safety [clears throat] a safety pin on the top of his lapel. You think to yourself, must be a, you know, Prada safety pin. Maybe it's made out of platinum. Right? Why would he be wearing a safety pin on top of his jacket? Anyway, you're very curious. Half of you is thinking maybe he forgot to remove it. You don't want him to be embarrassed. You have this whole internal battle. Should I? Shouldn't I? Should I? Shouldn't I? Until eventually you can't handle anymore. Your curiosity wins out. And you go to the man, you're like, you know, there's a stick. He goes, I know. He goes, oh, is that like is it decorative? Is it platinum? >> Right. Prada. He says, "No, you put there by mistake." He said, "No, no, it's on purpose." Very hash. He said, "This safety pin was given to me by the queen of England." I don't know the story. Maybe he was in the in the castle, the palace. Maybe the hem of his pants was falling down. Maybe the the the you know she took out of her purse but it's a safety pin from the queen of England. Wow. Priceless given to you by the queen. Sometimes the value of the object is inherent and sometimes the value of the object is adjacent. It's given by the context within which that thing lives. A safety pin given to you by the queen of England. That's one of your, you know, family treasures. Now you hand it down with the story. We think that there are big mitzvot and small mitzvot. But really all mitzvot are really just mitzvot. What is a mitzvah? A mitzvah is a commandment that was given to me by me, not the queen of England, the king of all kings, the eternal creator who came to humanity and handed me a mitzvah. Which mitzvah makes no difference. The importance of the mitzvah is that I was commanded to do so by God. So my friends I want to share with you which mitzvot are we talking about? When we talk about mitzvot that people step on with their heels also what kind of like if you see a sid fall on the floor what do we do? >> We run pick it up and you kiss it. >> Nothing makes me more majun. looking at all the sidur all the prayer books on the shelves and there's one turned upside DOWN RUN OVER TURNED upside down could you fathom stepping on a sided a cidur is only a mitzvah who could step on a mitzvah says mitzvah that people step on with their heels answer is that's not what it means. We do not mean a mitzvah that a person steps on cuz he's trying to grind it into the floor. We mean the mitzvot that become you become so used to them that they become part of in Hebrew we'd say they become so mundane that they become part of your daily routine. Brush my teeth. Do a mitzvah. Yeah. Wash my face. is doing mitzvah. You're doing it half asleep. You don't even realize you put antibacterial cream on your toothbrush. A mitzvah becomes wrote becomes something that you do your it just means that you do as part of your walking through the day. As you move through the day, you do a mitzvah. And the Torah says that's considered as if you stepped on the mitzvah because you turned it into something that you just do by the by. I would like to suggest that the nature or the antidote to if you will do these commandments, right? The response to that, the answer to that, the antidote to that is that a person recognizes from whom the mitzvah came. You focus and you say to yourself, I am doing now a mitzvah that God himself commanded me to do. My friends, that is the nature of what the cabalists felt was so important as a precursor to every single mitzvah is. You know how I do a mitzvah? In trembling with awe. I am coming to do a mitzvah from the Torah that commanded me to do. In fact, even if you're not a cabalist on most mitzvot, you're still saying, "Look at what the bar is saying. Blessed are you, whatever the mitzvah is, Hashem, you sanctified us, me, and you commanded me to do this mitzvah. We're very busy with the details of the mitzvah, but a lot of times we're so focused on the detail of the mitzvah, we left out the most important part of the mitzvah, which is that it is a mitzvah. It is a commandment from Hashem. Hashem, I am doing your will in giving saddaka. I am doing your will in honoring my parents. I am doing your will. This will that you gave to us to sanctify us, to elevate us, to make us holy. What an unbelievable gamechanging thought. The beauty of living with awareness is that you don't always have to think about it because you've never forgotten it. You know, I live with the awareness of Hashem. You know what the proof is? All of a sudden, you have to slam on your brakes. And what happens? When we grew up, my dad throw his arm out. You hear great news. YOU HEAR TERRIBLE NEWS. You know how you know if something is in you that you live with that awareness? When you test the person without any reaction time, there's a famous psychological test called the roar shot. What do they do? They show you these ink blotches and they ask you quickly, "What do you see? What do you see? What do you see? You see the old lady or do you see the young lady? Do you see bugs? you know crawling across a thing or do you see a beautiful sunset? What do you see? Tell me the first thing that you see. If I tell you this, what's the first word that comes to mind? Father, safety. That means that my awareness of my father is that he takes care of me. If you say father and the person says credit card, they might be a teenage girl, [laughter] right? That split-second association tells you without thinking what's your relationship with your father, past, childhood, whatever. Don't think, react. only give me the information that's there, not what you want me to hear. Don't manage it. So all of us, we live with the awareness of Hashem. Hashem is with me every minute of every day of my life. However, that is the positive part of awareness. It never leaves you. The challenge of awareness is that it becomes >> routine. It's just part of your routine now. And it loses the special nature, the power of what it is, the beauty of what it is. And I think maybe that's why the puk goes through a double whammy. Careful, don't forget, and you shall remember Hashem. Well, if I haven't forgotten him, surely I have remembered him. And the answer is actually that's incorrect. Not forgetting is just the fact that you're living with that awareness. But are you concretely, positively, actively remembering? I always point out that the word for memory in Hebrew zikaron is also the root of the word zakar which means male. In the male female biological reality, the male provides the seed and the female receives the that seed and turns it into something. The female is a mikabel. She receives. She's a vessel. She takes potential. She turns it into something. But the zakar is the active giver and the woman is the passive receiver. Not that that is a lower point. In fact, as we've mentioned many times, even within the male persona, there are female attributes. Okay? The Gimar famously describes um the asashim that they are feminine in their strength and yet they are zakar in other ways. Zakar and male and female are not only sexual indicators or gender indicators. Zahar is an active a proactive element. Zikaron is zakar because our memories create our actions. We think, we move, we desire, we want based on our memory. So action comes from memory. That's why zakar and zikaron are linked. Says the Torah. I understand that you did not forget in this passive way. But that's not enough. I needed to become a proactive thought through generated thought in your prefrontal cortex. And that's the duality of and also so a person should find ways to be able to state these things into his existence every day of his life. Hashem, I see you. I remember you. You see something happen that is fortuitous. serendipitous and instead of saying the universe has its ways say I love when God does that these statements these awarenesses that a person brings forth that's called when we live with that then it changes us Hashem should bless us to have both forms of memory constantly available constantly shaping and constantly with us throughout our entire life. Amen. Amen.