The Power of Teshuva - Rabbi Dovid Goldwasser

[Music] We Begin of course in talking about in repenting how do we do it how do we get there so the first thing that everybody knows is I got to know what I'm doing I can't do something wrong and continue and say I'm doing tsha I got to try to repent I got to try to fix that which I'm doing wrong it's an interesting thing uh there was a person that came over to me and he had something that wasn't Casher something not Kosher he was eating and he comes over to me and he says uh Rabbi could I ask you a question I really would like to do tsha I want to repent and in the middle he took a little bite I don't mind took a little bite so he said tell me where do I start I want to tell him well if you put the food down we could really begin but it's an interesting thing he didn't know it he didn't realize it he came over to me it was an open street he didn't realize it but that is you and I sometimes we don't realize it we got to take stock so somebody came to the great Reb of leens Noam El great rebi of leens thousands of people from all over the world go to his Kev in Adar in order to pray there are thousands of people I was there and I was inside and it was so packed that you could not move let alone breathe you couldn't move people gave to me little papers to pray for them kitl and I'm praying I had maybe few hundred all of a sudden one of the papers that I didn't pray for I didn't see the names fell down it is e it is impossible to go down and then get back up because as soon as you go down everybody goes together so I looked at it how can I let a Jew want to have a prayer How Could I Let It Go so I looked down there was a fellow that I was together with Rabbi pransky and he says Reby forget it you can't go down I said I got to you cannot go down I start going down he with another guy stood there blocking out the people nce miracle that I came back up in this world that's how many people go to the great Rebel M and so a very faithful tamid a very very faithful student a student that was a great Tam himself comes at this time right now this time of year and says Reby I need something the way they did it was they would put a piece of paper write down the request their name their mother's name and then give it into the great sadik so he gave the name he gave what he had requested on the paper to reens Rebel looked at it and what did it say that he wanted not money not things in the physical world not materialism not gash you know what he asked for ch complete repentance that's all he asked for Rabbi help me I want forgiveness I want I want pardon I want I want I want to have a good year but I know it's all CH as soon as RAB opened it up and he saw it immediately he began to call out with a loud voice for what you want to have t for what tell me what you need to repent for now I tell you the truth all of us we're embarrassed someone would say what do you do wrong well if they ask me R goldwaser what do you do wrong I say nothing I'm perfect no I wouldn't say that but I would be embarrassed to say what I did I certainly would be embarrassed especially to the good people here I would be very embarrassed if Rabbi Alik says what are you doing wrong and you have to answer him a great great sadik then the embarrassment and the shame is Multiplied a thousand thousand times however uh interesting we're going to learn just for one moment of course if RAB asked him what did you do wrong he's got to say rebi I did this and I did that now I just want to learn together with you for one minute what it says in thean that's the little list written in the sa it's unbelievable it's a short list of things that a person should go over you can go over it every day or once a month or once a year it's an important thing in that it says the following a person should tell over before their MO whoever is the person that that they have as a leader as a guide or even a even a trusted friend trusted friend showed me a picture tonight from 205 206 together it's beautiful that's a friend or a trusted friend to tell them all of the thoughts here bad things whatever it is what is connected the Tora that the the evil inclination talked me into whatever it is I should tell him I should be I should confess I should tell him I wasn't so careful in this I may have said a word I shouldn't maybe I took something and I wasn't careful I used it without the permission I returned it after but I used it without permission maybe I wasn't so honest maybe I didn't treat my parents with the cavod that I should have maybe maybe I should have given more and I didn't maybe I should have been a little bit more patient with my husband with my wife with my children and I didn't I wasn't so all of these things I have to do to I got to be in for anything else that is what it says in the safe of re a person that does this and don't worry about shame don't worry about embarrassment don't worry about how hard it is to say it say it out and you will find that you will be able to be mid gab just by saying it out if I say I had a Yater I took something that didn't belong to me and I speak it out and I tell it to the person believe it or not that destroys the for doing that again once I can say it out it destroys theer destroys that evil inclination that I had and the next time I will be able to be successful in fighting the and it's a a wondrous charm that's what said with that introduction he says to the talid to the student in front of him when he said what did you do tell me you want CH tell me what you did and don't leave anything out you say it completely theid said one of the days of the year I was sitting in the Sho maybe Young Israel Forest Hills I was sitting in the show maybe bed Gabrielle and all of a sudden while I'm in the middle of the I was in the first part I was after hu after hu okay even though it was still before still be and it is not a a strict rule that you may not talk before but it's not correct I'm praying I'm praying I can't say all kinds of conversations at that time I have to try to pray with great kavana with great feeling somebody came into me and said that there is a woman that is in right now now the middle of delivering a baby things Lo aleno are very very let me say it's emergency status things do not look good and she needs youim she needs you to pray for her he said rebi I will be mid I spoke out I asked the man to please give me her name so that I could pray for her and that is what I did wrong even though it was still before barar technically you're allowed to talk but it was in the middle of it was in the middle of praying and even though it was an emergency someone in CL Isel needed prayers they needed even though of course everybody would say you're allowed to do it I want to do tsha Rebel heard this and he sat down he wrote him out a Sader of tsha he wrote him out what he has to do what his tun will be what his repairing will be his reparation and what he needs to do in order to straighten himself out this is an amazing thing the one a that he did the whole year was that he spoke before barar in emergency state where he needed to find out the name of somebody to pray for her because it was an urgent urgent State this is an amazing thing it's amazing so we take a look at it and we say I only wish that my only the past year was that I did such a thing where does this leave us so I will tell you of course everybody is on their own level Hashem does not judge us on the level of that student of Rebel we're simply not judged maybe there's a person that can't do anything during the year maybe there's a person could only pray one day my great rebi rebi aigar Miller said when he used to be in New Jersey he was for one I believe maybe one year he was in New Jersey as a uh Rabbi I don't know how it happened or maybe it was a few months there was one one woman that came one day a year she came to the ezat Nim the woman section of that synagogue she didn't know how to pray she didn't know how to do T she didn't know anything technical about Yip other then one day a year she came she sat inim and she cried she cried from the beginning of the day until the end of the to day rebi aigar said that was CH one day one day a year she came in she didn't come the whole year she didn't who knows what she did the whole year but that one day she came Hashem only asks us what we could do whatever is possible for us to do on our own level maybe I can't be careful maybe I can't be careful un maybe I can't maybe it's just the way I am I just talk a lot but I could be careful on Shabbat I could be careful onum I could be careful when I go to sleep if somebody calls me on the phone in the middle of the night and they say listen I got to tell you a story you can say right now I cannot say l call me back tomorrow morning 7:00 you will'll be able to have a good convers but right now I can't do it the person that's on that level that at least they realize that they got to be holding somewhere that person understands what is TSH Hashem does not require more than we can produce Hashem says I'm not going to ask you to be better than you can if you can learn one you can learn one from the T beautiful I'm not going to ask you to learn 10 if you can learn one paric I'm not going to ask you to learn 10 if you can learn a mishna that's beautiful Hashem says all I want is that you should do whatever you can and now as an interesting thing a person came to me and it was about three weeks ago the person told me that Unfortunately they had fallen in to an a to a sin Yar is very smart our evil inclination is smarter than we know we take a we take a good nap we go to sleep in the middle of the day you go in the in the raft on the pool and you have a nice time in the sun you soak in the Rays we take a little extra time maybe in the summer we have a little vacation Yar is constantly Around the Clock thinking how can I get that person he could wait for years in years to find out how can I trap that individual how can I set up to make them n they were always so careful and look what happened and so a person came to me after many many years of being just perfect exact they always did what they had to they always followed they were always careful in every Mitzvah they never ever tripped up not one day all of a sudden it happened to be that one day they came into sh one day the individual not knowing what was going on the person didn't expect this to happen somebody came in an individual that was not a good person and it could happen at any time we say every morning every morning save me for any person that's gonna try to cause me harm a person's going to be difficult save meem protect me and this individual came in and said that he needed a little bit of help wa would he need help in the person told him I need you to help me out because uh I'm very poor and I need some money okay uh what do he want to do he told him if if you'll help me and you'll give me some money so that I will be able to win my money back then you'll do me a big so the man said okay I'll do it he took out his wallet he began to give him money next day the guy came back I have your money for you begins to get M you didn't have to pay me back the next day oh it's okay I want a lot of money yes yesterday how'd you win money I thought you were kidding me you're going to win money he says no no I have a place I go and I took the money and all of a sudden I was able to double it and I paid you back you want me to show you would you be interested in knowing how I made the money began began money can cover everything up he says yeah I would like to see it and so he took him to a place where they gamble a place where they were gambling and he began to show him and he said you could make money I know you're a very religious man you could make money for S you could make money for charity I know you the man began to think charity I would like to for for the first time in his life he took out his own money and he began to gamble as everybody knows unfortunately there's no quick way to become rich the man went he lost all of his money by telling him he's going to make money for was able to get him involved in an addictive behavior in which he lost all of his money now the guy sits in front of me and says I did some very bad things because I owed money could I ever do tsha everybody can do tsha it does not matter even a person went and they were O A even they bowed down to Idols they went to the Far East and they bowed down to Idols it doesn't matter a person stole it doesn't matter an individual when they could have done the worst of Iran the World there is a for that what is the worst that a person could think of there is tsha and we have it in the Torah all over we have it from El he did every a in the book immorality he did t r evil he did T the water came up to his nose he's going in the sea all of a sudden he mes and he says he tried to say the water went in there and that's the reason we have it that way he did T Hashem says you know what you did TOA I'm going to set you up you're a king he walked out of the water became king and nve Hashem is open to every single person to do tsha Cen Cen remember Ken remember what happened with Kenne so fascinating idea Hashem had Adam meet Cen when he came out of ganaden he saw Cen what did Cen do the worst K took out a gun and he killed he because he was jealous great reason he killed him because he's jealous of another person so he killed him H NE murderer how could the murderer ever be forgiven can't bring back the it's going to take until until the Revival of the Dead that sh will come back what kind of Chu is there for him however it's fascinating Adam meets Ken so he sees him still walking around he goes over to me he says Ken what happened with your din what happened with your judgment so kind said I tell you the truth I went and I made a I made a compromise with Hashem God made a compromise with me and I was able to live I was able to be forgiven in that moment Adam said the following m m Shabbat okay that's what the that's what Adam answered back all of the commentaries asked the question what does m Shabbat have to do with ch and what happened with K and it's an amazing amazing thing Adam also was able to do tsha after he ate from the atadas he was down and out Hashem threw him out of Gan and can you imagine you have Utopia you got the greatest thing in the world you're living in ganeden and then you become expelled because he ate from the he was so upset that Hashem came to him he said Adam what happened Adam said Hashem let me do let me do Hashem said why he says if I will be able to do TSH so everybody that lives all the time in all the years until mhia will come will say that it is possible to do TSH let me DOA Hashem let him DOA he said I forgive you Adam have had one sin that he wasn't supposed to do only one Mitzvah he blew it he broke that only one thing that he had to do every one of us says if only I Liv there back in ganeden how careful I would be I would make sure that I was able to live forever and look what Adam did Hashem says I forgive you but he still felt bad you know what hasem gave to Adam you will not believe this in the future there was going to be a Hashem said I am going to give you the baged I will give you the special clothing of the Coen Gad and you're going to be able to keep it Adam took the baggot of the Coen Gad and that was something that was a great it gave him power it gave him encouragement that's chuva that's what hasem does for all of us now I got to tell you small incident from the tud that will help us to understand whyat has to do with ch let's learn together we learn about shimik shimik great great man he said in my whole life I never ate from the Asam from the Corban of a Nazir I never ate the Nazir brings the Corban at the end right air dedicates himself to Hashem remember lets the hair grow uh doesn't drink wine is very careful not to be never gets close to any uncleanliness ritual impurity very careful at the end of it all shaves off his hair brings the Corbin there's a whole purification process if he messes up in the middle of the N of the term and he became tame he's got to start all over again from the beginning of the term so he said I never ate from aam Nair I never ate from the offering of any Nazir because he didn't trust it he didn't know whether the Nazir was 100% well-intentioned whether Nazir was on that level whether Nazir did everything that he should have so he never ate however there was one time a Nazir Nazir came from the south one of these people that took under NIU Nazir came from the south he went over to him from him I did eat only one time in his life did he trust the carban of a Nazir and that was the man that came from the south why because he saw that this nazer had beautiful eyes to his hair exactly curled beautifully very very outstanding looking person he walked over to him and he said my son tell me why' you do this why you destroy your good looks the beautiful hair and everything it's going to be shaved off because you became a Nair why did you choose to do that tell me tell me then azir said the following I was a simple poor Shepherd in the city that I lived I went to fill a pale of water from the water I bent down into the water and as I saw my reflection I saw that I'm very handsome I saw that I look beautiful and in that moment the came over me all kinds of things suggested into my mind what I should do had a grip on me with that hair and that beauty I decided in that moment I'm going to take the and he said the following listen to this listen what he said to him he says to the when he wanted to take him out of the world rash he said to the to the evil inclination you evil one why are you arrogant in the world that is not yours I'm in the future I'm not going to be anything in the future after 120 years I would have to worry about gash so he said to himself why are you such a Rasha in the world that doesn't belong to you as soon as rabish Shimon heard his story he went over to him he kissed him on his head to this nazer from the south he kissed him on his head and he said from your food food from your carban I will eat that's the story that's all the story now the question is unbelievable we know what happens with a Nazir every nazer is great who wants to become a nazer anybody over here anybody tonight want to become a nazer I give you all the rules we can have a whole Shear afterwards K going to sponsor it we'll talk about nud you'll get the whole thing and will be able to go over anybody want to do it we got one guy over here wait till he hears what's entailed anybody okay uh I ain't doing it not me and theer had to be a holy person who else I'm going to undertake it no wine not the grape have to be careful T afterwards shave the head afterwards bring the carbon if I mess up in the middle I got to begin the whole thing over again a Nazir has to be somebody who is on the highest level of Holiness so what was different about this Naz than the other Nim they're all K they're all holy people in the highest level imagine you walk in the street and your shim and you see a r kki and you see this gaon and this sadik and you see the great RAV what would you do all the all the you see all the great people would you not eat from their that's how Al in were they were all great who else is dedicating their life to Hashem it's a difficult thing here's the following answer the answer is what he said when a person is thinking about doing a Mitzvah so they begin to think about whether I should do it or not I told you about the guy one time he was offered when you free the mother bird you know the mother bird you send off the children you take it's an unbelievable mitvah what do you get for that what's anybody good long life tell me where that's at tell me where I can get that youth from I'll buy it so he calls me up re I said yes he says there's a I said do it oh uh but it cost some money I said well things cost money so what because there's a guy that has a whole setup and will tell me he says yeah but it's $250 so I said to him uh can I ask you a question this is an older man did you ever do before no can you afford the $250 yeah Rabbi I mean you know who you talking to I said so why not but the $250 but but is it worth that but maybe I could find it for free yeah you're GNA find it on the Bel Parkway somewhere she go go and look on the Jackie Robinson she again all right good I won't tell you the story it's on Tor any time somewhere but it's interesting he missed it up because he kept calling me finally he say he's going to do it the guy said sorry somebody else took the bird you're done I got to pay the money but look what I could do for me to be able to stay up and to learn and to come to such a beautiful night with kazak oh yeah I got to stay up late I mean could have made this thing at 9:30 I could have got here earlier but everybody stays late and they learn it's unbelievable thing it's unbelievable do they care about thees of going to sleep no not people not people here or a I have the same I begin to think a okay now I know this thing you're really not supposed to do but I tell you the truth I would enjoy it I would love to do that yes but there is but there's going to be a punishment for it now wait a minute if I don't do it in a way that I'm over de from the Torah I only do it in a way it's the ran Rabin so then it's not such a big a the ones the punishment is less so maybe the joy that I'll have is it so bad I got to start to weigh it out maybe it's not so bad if I robbed the bank I could walk home with a million dollars I could be put in prison for 25 years but Shalom but I could walk away I started to weigh it right everybody has in whatever we're doing we take a look at the moer what do we do on the moer I start to look at it oh man there's a lot of pages over here I skip a few on that no one will know right go down 488 holy man what up that missing page so Hashem said I was just waiting for that page the whole year that one page and you went who next one but it's going to take time for me to do the page every single thing that I got to do every time I got to watch out from any Shabbat thing I shouldn't do anytime I got to say the truth okay look if I say a little sheer it's good because I could get a discount I could tell them you know it's like the mother going on with the on the plane with the little kid so I don't know you go on you I don't know which age you get on for free but whatever so little kid starts talking early like you know they're already over the age to it mama says listen if she asks you a question how old you are don't say nothing don't say nothing the kid says okay but I might say something okay then say two but mommy I'm three that's okay but if they ask you the question you say two but I but I got to say three but no no say two but was that back and forth back and forth don't say anything pretend you're sleeping but mommy I'm not sleeping no but pret what do we do everything is aone if you train the child when they're little not to tell the truth where they going to grow up to be gav where they going to grow up to be someone you can't trust someone you can't let out of your eyesight that's what they're going to grow up to be so I have to be careful it's not worth it I'd rather buy the plane ticket for the person that is our life no no a I can start thinking about it yes or no that is what the Nazir said the Nazir said why are you arrogant with a world that's not yours you're telling whether you're going to do the Mitzvah whether you're not you don't got a choice that is our work in this world you're thinking whether to do the a whether not to do the a well I tell you the truth it is I'm a little more careful but it's not I can still have a little chance no Noone it's not my choice it's not my world that's what the naer said this is not my world I don't have a choice whether to be good or not to be good a Mas that was given over unbelievable a Mas that was given over is the following I think the great sabka did it he said the following the king a great king comes out Royal Majesty with a cloak with the white garment beautiful velvet thousands and thousands of dollars in that white cloak walking through the streets all of a sudden the king the Mel sees that there are some little children playing uh some kind of little game in the dirt there's a lot of dirt the king begins to make a bone I would like to play with them little kids the only thing is I got the beautiful white cloak on and it'll get dirty it could get ruined completely it may not be good anymore so the king decides not to do it no the Saba says that's not it at all the king little kids playing in the dirt that's not his world he has no connection no shus nothing nothing to do with it it doesn't even enter his mind he going to get down on the ground and start the play in the dirt with the kids no way because he's in a different world the same thing is where we get to in our lives has to be to the point this is not our world the world of a the world of making of sin the world of making should I do this thing should I not does it cost me does it not cost me that is not our world our world is completely different from that I am in the I am the world of spirituality and that's why it says when I'm happy you have gladdened me Hashem with all of your works that's where I get my happiness from I will sing when I see the greatness of what you gave me in the world I will sing when I see the food that I have on the table Shabbat there ain't one person in this whole room in this large assembly that didn't have something beautiful for Shabbat that didn't have the best CH the best kba that didn't have the best chicken the best cakes the best Delicacies the best schw I don't know whatever you had sushi there's not one person that didn't have the best praise Hashem for that hasem you gave me a suit to wear Hashem you gave me clothing a dress to wear Hashem I bless you for everything that I have I got a home and the air conditioning is here and I bless you that there's kazak and I bless you there's Torah anytime and he brute in the entire world I bless you because look what you did for us we are a generation that is on the I don't want to say it but we are in the most challenging level that any generation has ever been take a look at what's going on in the world take a look at the news see what's happening complete corruption morals ethics forget about about it forget about anything if we did not have kazak if we didn't have these organizations where will we be where would the world be right now if we didn't have somebody worried about the children going into public school and taking them out where will we be so we have to praise thank you hasem I appreciate it Hashem you gave me my health B har I'm able to come to AER where able to enjoy together beautiful Mala Mala beforehand Hashem thank you all the things that I have to appreciate in life once I do that I realize your works are so great your thoughts are so profound I am completely wrapped up in that world I am going to sing into dance to hasm every day that I am to be from CL is that I am a Jew that I have MIT that I can learn that I can be part of it that I can go to Israel that I can stand by the holy wall I thank Hashem what could have happened with my life and look what did happen then I realize that that whole world that world out there the world of craziness the world of sheer Madness the world of gash has nothing to do with me I am here and I'm going in this world with Holiness on the path of our fourfathers and for mothers that's where I'm at and that is what each and every one of us has this to be a part of in this world we have to hold on very very tightly the great Rabbi of ran Rabel of ran said in this world Hashem said take the tight rope walk that tight rope that high wire you got to walk that tight rope he says however in the m in the time before messia will come the Satan the adversary takes one side of that tight rope and begins to shake it in order to keep our equilibrium our balance in order to keep straight on the path a person has to be extremely extremely strong we have to be extremely extremely proud of who we are never to make not if I could I would stay the entire night there a r of chuen there but I just will I'll just end with something nice the great babaali may his Merit shill over us he had a custom that every Roes the first of the month he made a special suda invited only special people to that Suda to get into that you have to be something special or somebody that was very very much in need lenu someone that had a lot of they could get in and so it happened to be that one he had his assembl private room locked one man was there had a number of difficulties number of challenges a number of things at home that had to be needed big br the number of daughters other things his wife and he was there babaali comes in and he sees him babaali was so moved by this man in his tarot in his plight that he wanted to pray for him then all of a sudden before he was ready the door opens nobody opened the door somebody opens the door babaali looks up and sees his son-in-law Rabbi yov standing there basali looks at him and says who told you to come what are you doing here Babas Sali never spoke that way babaali always sensitive and kind what are you doing here when babaali said something you listen the son-in-law began to grow pale he told him again again why are you here who invited you the son-in-law m game all of a sudden he said to him I'm like a son and his son is allowed to come in to his father whenever he wants babaali heard this and said repeat those words again and he said said I'm like a son and a son is allowed to come into a father whenever he wants babaali looks up at Hashem and says B did you hear it did you hear what he said I am like a son and a son is allowed to come to the father whenever he wants basali went over to the wall he turned away from everybody for about 10 minutes he kept his eyes closed and he prayed with tears afterwards he turned around to everybody I prayed and I have been answered to everybody here this evening to everybody throughout the world that will see this for all of us we should all pray in BZ we should all be answered [Music] [Applause]