The Power of Positive Thinking - Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch

[Music] one of the most common questions I'm asked as a psychologist are what are the keys to living a happy life I want to share with you today two incredible true stories about how I learn from these stories how to share the power of happiness with people that come to see me as a psychologist the first story is that of a great psychiatrist a Jewish psychiatrist named dr. Viktor Frankl Frankel was from Vienna and he went through three concentration camps including Auschwitz he lived to tell his story and after the war he wrote an incredible book called man's search for meaning one of the most important and well read books of the 20th century he talks about the secret towards living a happy life a secret he uncovered in the concentration camps and he looked around and he learned from the camps and he says his Falls those who had an orientation towards fulfilling a future meaning in their lives when they would hopefully be out of the camps were most apt to surviving the camp's Franco was telling us an incredible thing when a person is in the concentration camps across mashaallah they're experiencing sadness anxiety and/or depression the most important thing they can do is find a goal to live towards find something greater than themselves to focus on he therefore said like this people that go out and pursue happiness they wake up and say you know I want to be happy today I'm going to make sure I'm going to be happy today no matter what happens to me I'm going to be happy what does Viktor Frankl said those people won't be happy he says like this the more you pursue happiness the more it runs away from you what does a person have to do a person has to fulfill a meaning in their lives the more they fulfill that meaning the more they going to feel a sense of meaning and therefore they're going to be granted the present of happiness he says if you try to fulfill a meaning happiness simply ensues and this is what he discovered in the concentration camps he said there was one freedom that the Nazis you maximum could not take away from anyone they could take away your body they could take away your food they could take everything away from you except one thing the power to choose your attitude towards them it's the one ultimate human freedom and he said despite the conditions of the camp I will see if I can share a morsel of bread with the prisoner waiting to be killed I will see if I can share a kind word with somebody who lost a family or is facing almost instant deaths in the concentration camps Frankel said when he was giving to somebody and fulfilling a meaning by giving to them he could experience a sense of happiness and his message was not just for the camps it's for everyone in the world today if you're feeling sad look for something beyond yourself to fulfill the second story which shows us the power of happiness happened over two decades ago when a group of yeshiva students were on the Brooklyn Bridge and suddenly without any warning a group of Arab terrorists started shooting at their van one child was killed immediately others were wounded one young man was taking the hospital school conscious he was shot in the head when he got to the hospital things did not look good but they got much much worse he started bleeding in his brain the doctors didn't know what to do they had to take him to surgery immediately to save his life during that surgery they had to remove a part of his skull to make sure he could live and they did this effectively and the parents of this child his brothers and sisters were all standing around sinked hill and sang psalms praying to god doing whatever they could possibly do they asked a doctor one of the chances of him surviving he said it doesn't look very good I've seen many cases like this before and very very few people would actually ever be able to survive such an attack what happens the next few days despite that condition despite the doctors warnings his family never gave up hope a few days later to the shock of audiences watching a live TV broadcast and everyone standing around the mother of the child who's lying in a coma turned to the audience and said I'm here to invite all of you to celebrate the future wedding of my son everybody looked and amazing this poor boy he's sitting in a coma yet the mother is inviting everyone to enjoy this tremendous simcha no one was sure if he'd actually even live but here's a remarkable thing she was calling on the power of a great statement of track good benzine good meaning think good and it will be good she was doing something called conscious determinism despite the conditions despite the shock to everyone listening all her doctors she had positive thoughts she believed that she could think positively she'd have a positive outcome the remarkable end of the story is his young man survived went on to get married Berkeley shem is raising a wonderful Jewish family he was a product of good thinking the two most powerful secrets is being happy or one searching for meaning in your life forget about trying to be happy just go beyond yourself achieve something greater than yourself help somebody love somebody give to somebody else happiness will ensue if you don't chase it and the second powerful secret is if you're feeling bad you're feeling worried you're feeling anxious maybe you're depressed do something very powerful chocolates enzyme good think good and it will be good use the power of conscious determinism I guarantee you more Flocka more success and more happiness dear life welcome to this new series and he de bruit called marriage matters my name is rabbi Daniel Samba and I'm a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based in New York and around world--well strike on this important series I will be answering your questions you have about marriage relationships dating parenting and about any issue during the family and relationships but more than what I have to say I want to hear what you have to say so please email to this address and send in your question and I'll try to answer as many questions on this Michelle