The One Mindset That Changes Everything - Rabbi Efrem Goldberg

You can operate and live in this world with one of two mentalities. Either I've moved in permanently. This is all there is. I've unpacked. I'm here to stay. This is all that exists. Or you can enjoy this world and all that it has to offer with the recognition, I'm only here temporarily. I'm just passing through. The Meforshim describe when they're born Yakov and Esau, Yakov is an Akev a heel. When a person takes steps, what touches the ground first? The heel of the foot. First he steps with the heel. Yakov is growing, walking, progressing, moving, advancing. He's always He's not a finished product. He's not done. Yakov is the best is yet to come. Esau in contrast, Esau on the other hand, Esau me lashon asui. Esau is a finished product. What you see is what you get. Esau was born that way. Esau was born that way. You know, thanks to AI, you can do anything today. So somebody created an AI and I saw it in my family WhatsApp group. It was a meme or GIF, I don't know the difference, but two babies in a double stroller that looked exactly the same, but one was ruddy, covered in red hair, and one looked like a baby. Right? They used AI. How did Yakov and Esau, these twins, Esau we know came out fully developed, like a mature adult. He already had a beard. He was already covered in hair. Why? Because physically was reflective of spiritually, emotionally, Esau is asui. He's done. He's complete. He's a finished product. What you see is what you get. There won't be any progress. He's not going to advance. We said this last week from the Meshech Chochmah. Remember what we said, beautiful insight from the Meshech Chochmah. After Yakov takes leave of Laban, Laban shav limkomo. Laban goes back to his place. The Yaakov Halach ledarko. Yaakov goes on to the derech. And the Meshech Chochmah said contrast the two. Lavan After all those years of living with a tzaddik, after all those years of living with the righteous Yaakov, he's unchanged. He's not influenced. He's not impacted. Where does he return to? Limkomo. My place, this is who I am, what you see is what you get. I am the same way I was 13 years old. I'm stuck, I'm fixed. This is how I am, this is how I learn. This is how I learn. This is my patience, this is my generosity, this is my attention span, these are my life goals. This is it. What you see is what you get. This is who I am. I'm fixed, I'm a finished product. What Carol Dweck would say is the fixed mindset. Halach limkomo, he's back right in the place, his default, that's where he started, that's where he'll end, that's where he is all the time in between. Yaakov in contrast goes ledarko, adarko. Yaakov's back on the derech. What's a derech? Derech is a path. Yaakov, that's his name. Footsteps. Puts down his heel. He's walking, he's progressing, he's advancing, he's changing. What Carol Dweck would call not a fixed mindset, but a growth mindset. A growth mindset is doesn't matter how old, how young, what stage of life, retired, working, always growing, always learning, always advancing. Esau is asui. Esau is asui. What is made, whatever exists in the present, is all that counts. That's not Yaakov. Yaakov, our essence is that olam hazeh, this world, is an entranceway to the banquet hall that the Mishnah in Pirkei Avot describes. So our stay in this world, you can operate and live in this world with one of two mentalities. Either I've moved in permanently, this is all there is, I've unpacked, I'm here to stay, this is all that exists, this is my identity, this is what I live for. Or or you can enjoy this world and all that it has to offer with the recognition I'm only here temporarily. I'm just passing through. Person goes to a hotel, a person goes to a resort. So, they don't necessarily fully unpack. They don't start making adjustments to the decor because they say I'm only here temporarily. I'm going to enjoy it. I'm going to maximize it. I'm going to take out of it everything I can. I'm going to take advantage of all of the amenities, but I'm just here temporarily. I'm just here just passing through. So, the tsaddiq Yaakov Avinu lives life in this world, I'm a ger. I'm a stranger. I'm a sojourner. I'm a traveler. I'm just passing through. I'm a temporary resident. Esau says, I've moved in. This is all there is. There is nothing more. So, I'm here permanently. And that's the message Hashem conveyed to Yitzchak when he said, "Gur ba'aretz hazzot ve'eyehi imakh." Hashem says to Yitzchak, "Ger, gur, sojourn in this land and I'll be with you." And the Eirach Sha'i explains, based on a pasuk in Tehillim, "Ger anokhi ba'aretz al taster mimeni mitzvotekha." I am a sojourner in the world, hide not your commandments from me. Why would David's status as a ger especially enable him to understand Hashem's mitzvot? The Degel Machaneh Efraim The Degel Machaneh Efraim explains that one shares one's inner thoughts and feelings only with a close friend. A person passing through a town doesn't bare his heart to the citizen of the town. He only bares his heart to someone who's traveling with him. Somebody's traveling, somebody's on a journey, someone who's sojourning, they pass through a town, they meet someone, nice to meet you. We could have a coffee. We could check in. We could make small talk. I'm not letting you into the inner most secrets of my heart. But somebody you travel with, someone you go on a journey with, someone you're vulnerable to, someone you make your way through this world with, that's who you are vulnerable enough to share with. So, David Melech was expressing that although he resides in Olam Hazeh, although he's living in this world, he's doing so with the mentality, the attitude of a ger. I'm just traveling. I'm just traveling. So, Hashem Kiveyachol is his travel partner. Hashem is his travel mate. They're going through the world together. Hashem's Shechinah is hidden and has no one to rest upon. Since I, David, I'm only a ger and you, Hashem, are traveling, you have no one to rest, so we'll we'll go together. Al tastireni mimeni mitzvotecha. We're in it We're in it together. And that the Arizal says, that's Hashem's message to Yitzchak. Gur ba'aretz hazot, ve'ehyeh imach. If you move in permanently, I'm not with you. But if you're going to bring the mentality of somebody who's traveling and journeying and we're doing it together, then ehyeh imach, I'm with you. I'm with you.