Transcript
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I want to tell you a great story. A few
shabbos ago, I spent it with my wife's
grandfather, Rabbi Hopfer from
Baltimore. Now, Rabbi Hopfer's family
comes from a little town in southern
Germany called Rexingen. And not long
ago, he went back there to visit the
kvarim of his grandparents.
>> [music]
>> And the old Jewish cemetery is still
there. There's a non-Jewish caretaker
who's hired by the town to [music] take
care of it. And so, Rabbi Hopfer's
walking around through the space of
kvarim looking for his family's kvarim.
And all of a sudden, the caretaker says
to him, "You know, I'm not sure you
realize this, but this town is actually
a miracle."
And my grandfather says, "Really? What
do you mean it's a miracle?" And the
caretaker says, [music] "During World
War II, almost every town and city in
this part of Germany was bombed by the
allies. Everywhere around here was
completely flattened and destroyed. But
this town, nothing. It was completely
left untouched. And you want to know
why?" the caretaker says.
Listen to what he says.
He says, "We believe it's because of a
Jewish man named Simon Hafrumer."
Who's Simon Hafrumer?
So, the caretaker points to one of the
kvarim and he says, "He's buried right
there. He lived about 200 years ago. But
the people of this town say that he was
such a kind, decent, righteous man. He
treated everyone with such respect that
they believe his merit protected [music]
the entire town from destruction."
Think about that for a second. Here is a
man who must have been so humble and so
kind and loving and compassionate that
200 years after he died, the non-Jews
are still attributing their success and
their salvation to his righteousness.
But here's what's amazing.
Have you ever heard of Simon Hafrumer?
Do you know anyone who knows Simon
Hafrumer? Do you know anyone who knows
anyone who knows Simon Hafrumer?
Do you know any star written by Simon
Hafrumer? Do you know any [music]
niggunim composed by Simon Hafrumer? Do
you know stories of miracles performed
by Simon Affrime?
I didn't think so.
Because Simon Affrime was just like you
and me, perhaps. [music]
Maybe he wasn't some famous Talmud
chacham. Maybe he didn't write any
sefarim. Maybe he went to work every
morning and worried about [music] money.
Maybe he had struggles. Maybe he had
days where he was tired and frustrated
and overwhelmed. Maybe he never had
thousands of people listening to him.
Maybe he never had talmidim or
chassidim. Maybe by every measure we use
nowadays to define greatness, he was
just an ordinary guy.
But maybe you know who he was? Maybe he
was just a really, really, really good
guy. Maybe he was a gadol in kindness.
Maybe he was a gadol in being genuinely
compassionate. Maybe he was a gadol in
making people feel respected. Maybe he
was a gadol in makdim shalom l'chol
adam, afilu nafrie b'shuk. Maybe when
someone walked into a room, he noticed
them. When someone needed a smile, he
gave them one. Maybe when someone was
embarrassed, he knew how to make them
feel important. Maybe when someone
needed someone to care, he was the one
who cared. And maybe he became a gadol
in something we've somehow forgotten
belongs on the list of things that count
as greatness, and that is being [music]
a really good person.
And maybe
that's exactly where we need to stop and
question
the way we define greatness. Because
somewhere along the way,
we've created this unofficial godless
Hall of Fame. You want to be a gadol?
So become a famous Rosh Yeshiva, or be
an unbelievable baal tefillah, or become
a philanthropist and give away millions
of dollars. And don't get me [music]
wrong, those things are incredible.
They're pillars of avodas Hashem. No one
is downplaying that.
But here's the problem.
We started acting [music] like those are
the only categories that count. We've
created these invisible power rankings
in our heads. Who's really a gadol? The
biggest Rosh Yeshiva, the biggest baal
tefillah, the biggest askan, the biggest
baal tzedakah. And then we look at
ourselves and say, "Well, I'm not any of
those. So, without even realizing it, we
walk around feeling like we're somehow
second-tier Jews. Like, maybe we're good
people, but we're not great people. No,
no. Not us.
But maybe we're asking the wrong
question. Maybe the question isn't am I
a godol? Maybe the question is
in what area can I become a godol in?
Because maybe Hashem never asked you to
compete in someone else's category.
Maybe he gave you a category of your
own. Because every person was given a
different neshama, a different
personality, different [music]
strengths, different struggles,
different opportunities. And maybe
Hashem wants you to become a godol in
your category. [music] You're a father,
become a godol in fatherhood. You're a
mother, become a gedolah in motherhood.
You're a businessman, become a godol in
honesty. Not decent in honesty, a godol
in honesty. You're a friend, become a
godol in loyalty. You're naturally warm,
become a godol in warmth. You have the
ability to make people laugh, become a
godol in bringing people joy. You have
the ability to notice the person
standing alone, become a godol in
noticing people. You have the ability to
be patient when everyone else has lost
their patience, then become a godol in
patience. You're the person who can walk
into a business meeting and immediately
sense that someone's being left out, so
become a godol in including people.
You're the person who can make your
spouse feel appreciated for the thousand
things that nobody else sees, well then
become a godol in gratitude. We need
[music] to stop acting like God was a
private club with only three [music]
approved categories. It's not. There are
endless ways to become an adam godol.
And maybe the greatest mistake that you
can make is spending your entire life
trying to become impressive at something
Hashem never asked you to be good at,
while ignoring the greatness he already
put inside of you. You don't need a
different neshama. You need to take the
one you have and take it seriously.
Obviously, Torah is connected to olam.
Obviously, tefillah is what keeps us
alive, [music]
not taking anything away from that. But
I think that sometimes because those
things are so great, we accidentally
make everything else feel small [music]
and insignificant, and that's a mistake.
Our avodas Hashem has so many different
dimensions, and we have to take [music]
every one of them seriously. We should
become a godol in our dimension, and if
the world never gives you a title for
it, who cares? Who cares that the person
sitting next to you has no idea how hard
you fought to control your anger. So
what? So what that nobody else will know
how many times you swallowed your pride?
So what that nobody else will know how
many times you [music] chose kindness
when you could have chosen cruelty? So
what that nobody will ever know about
your shmiras einayim battle? So what
that nobody will ever write a book about
it? But you know who does know about it?
Hashem knows. And maybe one day long
after we're gone, there will be people
whose lives are different because we
were here. Maybe entire towns will be
saved because of your godliness. That's
what happened [music] to Simon Affrimer.
He didn't become famous. He didn't
become a world-renowned godol, but the
people who knew really knew. He was no
joke. He was an adam godol. That's our
avoda, to take whatever Hashem put
inside of you and refuse to be ordinary
with it. We may never know who Simon
Affrimer was, but one thing we do know,
there is no good reason that the next
Simon Affrimer cannot be you. Yehi
zichro baruch.