The Hidden Message Behind Torah’s Forbidden Mixtures - Parshat Ki Teitzei - Rabbi Dovid Kaplan

Right in the middle of the page. Right in the middle of page 1050. So the very next thing it says, "When you build a new home, you should make a railing for your roof. There should not be blood in your house when somebody falls off. Now here we have a technical mitzvah. If you have a roof, if you have a roof that is a that is a usable roof, a usable roof. In the old days in the Gumar talks about they had a flat roof. They used to build their sukas on the roof. Kobia to close the door over there. If you can close the door and I told you the rule is no technology in the shear in anywhere in the room. No technology. If you need to be looking in a what do you call it? A phone. So take it outside. It's disrespectful for the Torah. So the uh the Torah says if you build this you build a house in the old days the the Gomorrah says they used to build the suka on the roof because the roads were flat. The roof was a usable like we would call a porch. So the roofs were flat. Nowadays you know if you have a slanted roof say nobody nobody goes up on a slanted roof. You don't have to build it's not usable. Why is it funny? >> Cuz my kids would still do it. >> Yeah. I I said people don't go up on a on a roof. Yeah, teenagers teenage teenagers do. Teenagers. I said people don't. But uh if it's got to be what we call a usable roof. We're talking about a a usable roof. And so that you have a mitzvah to build a maka. A ma is a railing that has to be at least taken is about 36 in so that people don't fall off and you have to build it so that nobody falls off. Now here the first the question is what's the connection to the previous mitzvah? The previous mitzah is talking about sending away the mother bird. So why is this how does what's the what's the logic? Why does this mitzah follow that mitzah? The answer is well what did you allow the mother bird to do? You allowed the mother bird to go and build a new home by not by not taking the mother bird. You allowed the mother bird to go and build another nest. You took away the first nest. You took the eggs in the nest. Maybe you took the entire nest. Now you've allowed the mother bird to go build another home. Since you allow the mother bird, you fulfill the Torah's mitzvah. So the reward is that a person will then figure a person will find the finances to be able to build their own home. That person will be able to build a new home. Number one. Number two, you may become very confident in your own home because the last what was the reward? What's the reward for sending away the mother bird? The Torah says that you send away the mother bird. It'll be good for you and you'll live long. Well, the Torah promised me I live long so I could build a roof without taking any safety precautions because after all I built I the Torah says that I'm going to live long. So Torah is teaching you doesn't work that way. That's a reward that a person is entitled to and the person's going to get but doesn't mean that we could therefore behave recklessly. Doesn't mean that a person should not live normally and take the the normal precautions that one is meant to take. And certainly that you shouldn't create a situation where somebody else may fall off your roof. I think Steve Jobs uh was it Steve Job? Who's the guy with the with the uh he was the the guy who the those things that you stand on and you scoot around on >> Segways. Who was the who was the who was the guy the guy who invented Segue was he it got killed on a Segway. He was on his he had this massive estate and he was on his segue and he went off he went off some sort of cliff on his own on his own property on on a on a segue. So, uh you can't the fact that the Torah says that you're going to be rewarded with long life doesn't mean that you can therefore behave that you can therefore behave recklessly. Number one. Number two, whenever the Torah says, this is just a general rule. When the Torah says, and you see that Rashi points this out, Rashi three lines from the bottom in the right column, Rashi says if you fulfill the mitzvah, sending away the mother bird, then you're going to build a new house. Now what happens whenever the Torah says these things and you don't see that the guy guys fulfilled the sending away the mother of bread but he didn't end up with with uh building a new house. Uh so here you always have to realize that there could be other factors at play. The Torah when the Torah makes a statement like this the Torah is telling you if all else is equal what this mitzvah is worth. But there might be mitigating factors. Maybe a person spoke lash horror also and the punishment for lash and shinhara it could be poverty and therefore you never know what a person never knows what the what are the mitigating circumstances over here what we need to do is we're tell the Torah is telling you do you know how potent this mitzvah is this mitzvah is so potent that it may very well be a resulting in you eventually building a new home you're going to build a new home but there's another reason why this mitzvah follows the when a other bird builds a builds a nest. You take a few what do they take leaves and some uh twigs and and you build yourself a nest. They're not very picky about what the nest they just build a nest and they know how to build somehow they some animals are programmed to they build a nest. The Torah is telling you that when you build a new house try to take the example for the bird the house shouldn't be ostentatious. So he just told me about a family has a a house with with 10 bathrooms, you know, and who knows how many who knows 26 rooms and 10 bathrooms. Why do you need such an ostentatious house for? And anyway, how do you clean it for PES? You got to do a big long, right? How do you clean the house for PES? And we're not trying to be ostentatious. We're trying to be there's a difference between being comfortable. A person's allowed to be comfortable and a person's allowed to be in a situation where we're striving to have enough that puts us in a positive frame of mind so we could take life we could accomplish something with our life. Do you need an ostentatious house or you got to build this magnificent mansion that so and so you really need that? Is it something you need or is it something you need to show to show the it's like the husband who says to his wife, you know, we're uh we're overdrawn in the bank again. You know, you wrote why are we overdrawn? The wife says, "It's the neighbor's fault. They're constantly doing things we can't afford." So, you know, you're trying to keep up with other people or show off for other people. The Torah says, "Don't be satious. Just build a be be like the uh be be like the mother bird." Okay. Then take a look at uh um five lines from the bottom. Do not plow with an axe and a donkey together. And here there's the prohibition to use any two animals in order to do work. You can't use two animals of unequal species to do work. So if when you're plowing in your field, you know, I used to have two oxes powing the plow or two two horses pulling a wagon. You can't have two different species doing something for you. And there are two reasons for it. What are the reasons? Why can't you do that? Different levels of strength. >> Different levels of stress. >> Jealousy. >> What's that? >> Creates jealousy. >> It create well animals you know the animals generally not. What you mean by jealousy is you mean difficult mean you mean difficulty. In other words of jealousy. One second. Where's the jealousy? >> A cow's you know >> you got an ox and a donkey. Donkeyy's like >> the Okay. So that's that's what what the what you call jealousy. The for say it's unfair to the weaker animal because the weaker animal now has to strain himself. A donkey now has has to strain himself to keep up with an ox who's stronger. And it's unfair to the ax because now he has to pick up for the donkey. Exactly what you used to do with your younger brother when the two of you had to do a job where where you forced him to do more than he could do and generally took advantage of him or you had to pick up for him, right? You had to you had to exert yourself more than more than he did. So the Torah says number one there's something called it's unfair you're causing distress to life to to to living creatures. How do you how are you causing distress? A the axe has to cover has to compensate for the donkey and the donkey may have to strain himself more than he normally can to keep up with the axe and therefore the Torah says you don't pull you don't uh uh you don't use two two animals uh of it. Number one, that that's one area of distress for the animal. There's another area of distress or a much more subtle area. An axe is a kosher animal. He chooses cud. The donkey does not. So the two of them could be working together and all a sudden the donkey hears the axe like the axe is chewing. He's like, "Hey bro, where'd you get the food?" [laughter] And the axe says, "The donkey, you don't want any of this, believe me. So, but but at the end of the day, the donkeyy's hungry and the axe is eating and the a donkey hears the axe, the axe is eating, and therefore the therefore the Torah says you don't you don't pull with a an ox a donkey together. By the way, I skipped one point going back to building uh a a completely different meaning which extremely important. I for I left it out. Go back again to for a second. When you build a new house and you make a a railing, don't there shouldn't be, how did the arts go translated? Not place blood in your house, meaning don't cause accidents because the guy will fall off of it. Here, uh, one of the classic commentaries says this is talking about very often a baluva that a person creates a new level for himself, which is what we're always striving for. We're always striving to create new levels. Sometimes we'll actually build in safeguards for ourself that when we create the new house, we create our new level. Sometimes some of the things that we do could be the actual cause that cause us to drop from that level. That means a person decides, listen, I'm uh uh I I'm uh uh I'm trying to strive for a higher level. So, you know what? I'm I'm uh I'm not going to listen to to non-Jewish music. Now, non-Jewish music, assuming it's not a woman singing and assuming that the lyrics are not suggestive, is not by definition prohibited. It may be distasteful and it may be something a person should move away from. If it's a woman singing or if the lyrics are suggestive, then obviously you cannot listen to it. But let's say it's uh let's say it's classical. You How about classical music? Okay. I personally don't go for it. But let's say somebody I'm not going to listen to classical music because it's non-Jewish conductors, non-Jewish composers. And then one day a person feels weak. He says, "You know what? Boy, I you know, this Yiddish cut is very demanding. I I got to listen to some of this music." He created a barrier for himself. Now he broke that barrier. When he breaks that first barrier, which no one told you to put up that barrier, you put up that barrier. Now you broke through it. And as a result of that you feel well if I broke through that barrier I could broke through my other barrier you know that barrier that I put up when it comes to kosher and the barrier that I put up when it comes to keeping shabas once I broke through the minor barrier I'm going to break through the major barrier also that could be great the cause of his entire downfall who told you to go and make life difficult for yourself who told you that you have to go to that extent and try to make life difficult for yourself and sometimes the very act of doing something and it by the way it could have a bearing on other people. I'll give you a classic example. Let's say you're living in a firm community and they have an a- roof. There's an a-roof and it's a legitimate a-roof. You're allowed by the letter of the law to carry and you decide I'm going to adopt this stringency and not carry even within a kosher a well that's a beautiful thing considering you have a wife and four children all beneath the under the age of one and now how is she supposed to get out of the house you how what she she's locked in the house every chabas becomes a prison for her because she can't get out of the house unless she has leaves you babysitting but no man's going to do that you know men when men babysit when maybe babysit for for for all the all the children for any great length of time, it leads to alcohol abuse. So So if it if you're you know you know so what are you going to do? You're trapping her now. Who told you to take on that stringency? Who told you to do that? Maybe you should go and consult with somebody wiser a rabbitic authority to find out are you ready for that at this level. A person decides, I'm only going to eat a a certain hessher. And then one day, one day you're you're on an airplane and they don't have that top grade hirer. So you're torturing yourself on the airplane. Who told you to torture yourself? Who told you to get to that level? Who told you to jump? That's why a person has to have a mentor to let you know if you're ready for that stringy. You're not ready for that if but recognize that it's a stringency. Recognize that it's a that what it is. And also recognize who are you? Are you sure you're ready for that? Are you sure it's not going? And by the way, the test the the determining factor here is generally if you do adopt any sort of stringency, again, letter of the law, we have no choice. If you're on an airplane and they don't have your kosher meal and all they're serving is is is baked ham, you can't eat it. That's the way it goes. That sometimes you sometimes yedish kite could be a little challenging. But if if if if there's something that is a optional, should I adopt that or not? The answer to that is does it leave you tense or does it leave you upbeat? If you're tense as a result, then you're probably not on the level to do that. Again, we're talking about something that's not mandatory. If it leaves you upbeat, you're typed many times, challenge is good, frustration is not. Certain life, sometimes in life, people like challenges. You have a project to do in the house. I I like the I enjoy the challenge of changing light bulbs. I don't enjoy the challenge of doing any other uh uh uh any other home home repairs, right? That leads to frustration. And even light bulbs is not a graces. But but they you have to I have somebody who's working in my house right now building putting some pipes in for me in my house. One of my son-in-laws, he loves the challenge and working out for three weeks. He loves the challenge. You have to know if you like the challenge or it leads to frustration. And Yiddish is like that as well. Sometimes a person pushes himself uh let's say you push yourself to help other people. Let's say you're a very helpful person. You like enjoy helping other people. If you help other people and you walk away frustrated, why doesn't anybody else help me? Then you know what? You shouldn't be doing it because you have no reason you have no reason to demand it of other people. You decided to take it on. You can't expect everybody else to do it. And if you're going to get upset about it, then you shouldn't be doing it to begin with. That's the that's the uh that that's the rule. Okay. So, when you build a new house, and this applies to all Balichas, I'm striving for a new level. We're all striving to grow. If my growth is creating tension, get some input from somebody more experienced who can tell you who can tell you whether the path you're traveling is the correct path. You know the famous example that the misles begins with the mis you ever see there's a garden maze. >> You ever see the shining? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I saw about 10 minutes of it then I ran out and I couldn't take it. Jack Nicholson gave me the Jack gave me the creeps on a good day. I didn't need when he's in an in a lonely hotel. That's even that that's for sure. I couldn't take it. But there is a garden maze and you walk through these garden maze and you can't see their hedges that are blocking you. So you can't see you're in this gu. You have no idea where you're going. There's somebody standing on a platform and he's telling you there's a platform at the finish line and he's up on that platform and he's saying you no, no, no, no, make a right. No, no, no, make a straight, a left. Assuming it's somebody who likes you. Assuming it's somebody who likes you. We're not talking about the lady and the tiger. We're talking about assuming it's somebody who doesn't want to mess you over. And he's telling you, he's telling you, "No, make a right. Okay, I left over there." You'd be foolish not to listen to him. He's got the experience. He's been through the maze. He made it to the finish line. So a person who's had life experience and he's studied Torah and he's an old and wise and he knows what works and what doesn't work and the rule in Yiddish kite is just because it feels good doesn't mean it's the right thing. When it feels good doesn't mean that it's necessarily the right path. Follow somebody. You wouldn't do that by medicine. A lot of medicines feel good. Codane codine is wonderful rightetamines my favorite. Yeah. But it doesn't mean that you're going to just take it because it feels good. You go to a doctor and find out should I be taking this or not. >> So if a person understands that Yiddish kite is spiritual, you also get a mentor, find somebody who's got experience, get guidance. Just because it feels good doesn't make it right. And if you're tense as a result, there's no reason that a person should be a Torah Jew. You should not. It doesn't mean life is just a party, by the way. Doesn't mean that just because you're a Torah Jew, the bus is going to come on time. You know, you go out there when it says two minutes, you know, on the thing where the bus is coming in and two minutes, you know, 14 minutes later the bus shows up. You know, all you're hoping is I wish these people would just time the rest of my life, you know. You know, it's a that's a long two minutes. But at the end of the day, at the end of that doesn't mean everything goes well. It doesn't mean you don't get a a big electric bill. It doesn't mean your washing machine doesn't break at the absolute worst time on air of shabas when your in-laws are coming. There are a lot of a lot of things can go but at the end of the day the observance of davening shab is cautious it shouldn't leave us tense and if a person is tense that means there something is needs a needs a readjustment okay I'll tell you something f something fascinating >> rabbi yes >> with with young preparing for shabas and all that wives >> there is tension yes >> there there is any anxiety >> there is tension but It's what I call a happy tension. Yes, there is tension in the house because put yourself in a wife's position. Every from Jewish woman, every Friday, every single Friday, she feels the weight and responsibility of an entire Shabas. And often it's for the guests that the husband volunteered her to to take care of. >> So she there is tension on Friday. Absolutely. Because you you got remember she's racing a clock. She's racing a clock because she's got to get finished. She loves that. She loves doing it. There wasn't a famona who doesn't want to prepare for shabas. It doesn't mean there are certain times in life. It doesn't mean that she she she's doing it. But you're you're racing the clock. When we put on fill in you should, you know, there's nothing to be tense about. Just don't wrap them too tight and cut off circulation. But there's nothing to be tense about. The same thing when it comes to same thing a woman. You're right. if Shabas is could be nerve-wracking. Therefore, it's got to be prepared and the husband has to be there to help. Husband has to help his wife. And not help doesn't mean relax. It'll get done. Don't worry about that. That's not what help is. That that doesn't help at all. That doesn't help. Help means do what she you you see what needs to be done. Help her out a little bit. I'm not talking about that. There are certain times as general though. In general, there shouldn't be that a person is tense about Yiddish. shouldn't make us tense. That's the idea. Okay. Now, uh take a look at take a look at um the uh the next one. Something fascinating over here. First, it says, "Don't plow with an axe and a donkey." Look at the very next one. Chhat do not wear chhat seim. Uh you cannot wear a mix of wool and and pishim uh what's it called? Wool and linen. You're not allowed to to to wear that mix anywhere on your clothing. That's why there's a how does he translate it? Um yeah. Yeah. the the the fibers. That means by when you buy a new suit, do do you know that? Do you know that clothing in Israel has a hexure on it? >> Yeah. When you buy when you go into a suit shop, it'll have a a patch or something sewed in that says this has been tested for shotness. Now, with shotness is wool and linen. And often in suits or suit jackets, this the collar and certain parts of the sleeves are stiffened with linen. So it could be a wool suit that has linen that's stitched in in various areas which stiffens it up. There are laboratories that actually check for shness in every from community. There's a shotness lab. A guy has a a microscope and they put they examine it for uh shness content. Some some uh uh suits it's possible to take it out. Actually, they could remove the shotness. The guy says, "Yeah, you got shness in here. He's going to have to remove the shotness." And there are others that are where it's so much it's it's it's so embedded in it all over the place that you can't do anything with it. There's no way to take out the shness. the uh there's also where the suits come from certain countries. There's a higher percentage than other Chinese suits are there there is a higher percentage than than European suits for example but they have to be tested in Israel when you go in they've already been checked and tested and there's actually certain supervision there's a hexure on the suit that mean you eat it you it just means you could wear it but at the end of the day at the end of the day it's a prohibition now one of the reasons it's prohibited is because the original offerings that were brought by Cayenne and He cayenne brought uh uh uh something that grew out of the earth, which is where linen comes from. And He brought wool. He brought animals, which is where wool comes from. Since the original mixture, the original mixture created conflict. It would led to the death of Kai. Kai was the first murder in history, first killing in history. Therefore, the one of the ideas behind it is that you don't wear you don't wear shness. That's one of the ideas. The other idea is that the kohanim and the bas mikdash did wear shness. The kohanim serving in the basa mikdash wore shness. Therefore, the average or the ordinary man does not wear sh like other things that are off limits. For example, there's a part of the animal the sacrifice. There's something called kalev. Do you know what khv is? is the forbidden fats of a kosher animal not kalav is milk is actually forbidden fats in a kosher animal there are certain section there are certain fats which are burnt used in this in the in the sacrificial service the severity of eating the fats of a kosher animal not all fats we're talking about certain fats which are called kv the severity of eating the fats of a kosher the kalev is greater than the severity of eating pork. How do you like that? That means a person could have a kosher animal and eating pork is prohibited if there are witnesses and a person is flogged in basin at the time when there was corporal punishment. A person has a flogging penalty. Person gets malus the penalty is premature death. Same as eating on kipper. >> That's how severe it is. Now, that's from a kosher animal. Now, why should it be so severe? Because that's the portion that is given. The the the medish compares it to a guy, a waiter comes walking in and he's walking to the he's got the king's he's got the king's dinner in his hand. The waiter, the royal waiter comes walking in and as he walks past you, you kind of take your you take your hand and you grab you grab a a a wing or a or or a drumstick off it off the king's meal. That's considered a that's considered a severe a severe uh uh act of of uh insubordination. You go and you you take from the king. How dare you insult the king. The fats, the forbidden fats are burnt on the altar from the corbonos. And therefore for a layman to go and indulge in the fat is an act of towards au the same way that that's got a limited use where is it used in the ba mdash similar the clothing of the kohanim which contains shness in them so then your average person is not allowed to wear shness but it has to be checked now I want to show you something Where do you find in Torah any sort of forbidden mixture? What can you think of where it's forbidden to mix? Where are there forbidden mixtures in Torah? >> What's that? >> Ctor is not a forbidden mixture. You're just not allowed to make ctoras. >> Crossbreeding animals. >> Shot. Milk and meat. >> Grain and vines like sewing seed. >> So good. Where else? Fish and meat. >> Fish and meat isn't prohibited by Torah law. Fish and meat is by by even by the letter of fish and meat is considered there's some sort of health uh way. We don't do it. We don't mix fish and eat. But it's not a Torah law. In Torah [clears throat] law, you're right. By the way, we don't make that's why you you always after you've had the fish on Shabas when they serve the first course, which is fish. If you eat fish, uh uh I if if you eat the fish, then often you rinse your mouth out or you you you have a piece of bread or you take a shot of you make a that's where the midhead comes. Uh and if you've had a lot of fish, they have a lot of the uh the uh if you if you've had if you've had gilda fish, if you had gilda fish, then nothing could help you. But uh but if you have uh what do you call you eat the fish, then you have a you wash your So there shouldn't be a mix between the meat, the fish and the meat. But by Torah law, there are five areas. Where are they? >> Men and women. >> Sh men and women definitely mix. Otherwise, there wouldn't be more men and women. The uh the the there are certain forbidden there. There are certain times. Yeah. Not not everything, right? Okay. Let's take it one at a time. First, the most famous meat and milk. Can't make meat and milk. You can't mix wool and linen. You're not allowed to plow with uh uh uh what we just said over here. You can't you're not allowed to crossbreed animals and you're not allowed to crossbreed agriculturally is what you mentioned. You can't put in Okay, now watch this. A man gets up in the morning and he first thing he does you get dressed a reminder from the Torah. You put on your clothes but don't mix. No wool and linen. >> Then you go out to eat breakfast and the Torah says, "But you can't mix meat and milk." That's your clothing and your food. Then you go out to your field. You can't mix agriculturally even out out in the field. You go out to your livestock. You're not allowed to plow with them. Another reminder, then you're not allowed to crossbreed your livestock. That means everywhere a Jew looks, his clothing, his food, agriculture, labor, livestock. Everywhere we look, we see a reminder. Don't mix. Which means ultimately we're reminded everywhere we look, don't mix with the other nations. Don't intermar with them and don't mix with their idol worship and don't mix with their values. That means we are a nation that lives alone. Don't look at them. Don't look at their values. Don't look at their behavior. Certainly their idol worship and certainly not to intermar with them. and a Jew. Everywhere we look in our regular daytoday life, food, clothing, livestock, agriculture, whatever we're doing, we have a reminder everywhere we look. Everywhere you turn, don't mix. Why? You're a separate nation. You were shabas last Friday night. What did you say at Kdesh? What did they announce at Kdish in public? And nobody objected. What did he say? He picked up a cup of wine and said what? Asher, he chose us and no liberals were there to object and say, "Well, you're a bunch of you're a bunch of uh elitists." Everybody then indulged. We said, he chose us. And then we made just like he separates between Jews and the nations. We're different. And we all agreed to it. We all said, "Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let me have another hit of that." Glen Morangi, right? We all we all agreed to it. We were all there. We all agreed to it. Never nobody objected. And he had a second helping at Chalt while singing all about how we're the chosen people. So the at the end of the day at the end of the day we're different and we remain different. That's one of the reasons when Yakov gave his sons the if you remember the sorry his grandsons to Ephraim and what was he what was the blessing? You should be like fish on land. First of all, the idea of being fish on land, I don't know if that's such a braha. You know, most of the time you put a fish on land, I don't know, it's such a great thing. Fish don't do really good on land. They're much better in water. So, there are several lessons here. You ever take a fish out of water, what what does the fish do? >> Flops around. >> He flops around. The fish is just jumping around. Now, if you didn't know anything, if you're just looking from the distance, that fish looks like he's in a disco tech. He looked like having a great time. You know, bunny's just bouncing around, you know, from a place of life. And that's really what the world is like. The world of people are just bouncing around all over the place. They just like they just look like they're having a best time. And really, what is it? They're in their death throws. They're in their death. Fish is just jumping around. You know, you could even put it to music, you know, but with a beat and then the some lyrics about beating up the policeman or something, you know, that that'd be great. And what does it look like? The fish just looks like he's in his day. The fish looks like it had the best time and he said his death rows. But it's even more than that. That's a fish on land. What does it mean to fish on land? The answer is I ask you a personal question. You don't have to answer if you don't want. Have you ever thought about being a bird? >> Yeah. >> Right. >> Of course. Have you ever tried flapping your wings? >> Have you ever I I'll admit in public I'm not I'm not embarrassed. I have been on a windy day. on a really windy day, especially if there's traffic, you know, like maybe this will be that moment, [laughter] you know, and first you look around, make sure you look around, make sure nobody's watching you, even though I've done it and periodically, you know, then you know, nobody's watching me. And then somehow I get to shill that night and I'm getting some funny looks, you know, but you know, and have you ever thought of being a fish? I I've looked at aquariums and the first my first thought when I see fish in an aquarium is what do you guys do all day? You're just kind of swimming back. You were there. You know, there's nothing there. What are you looking at? Why are you going back and forth? And and you're But to be a fish, I've actually tried thinking about what it's like. I've done this. I'm telling you, I I I will admit this in public. I've tried thinking about what is it like breathing water. Picture. Imagine breathing water. And you know what ends up happening? I start coughing. I'm like, [laughter] because to be a bird, there's nothing, you know, flap. All right. Oh, well, here I am. I'm still on the ground. A fish is completely different element. You're looking at a fish and you have zero connection. A bird I could relate to. I could relate to a bird. I could even jump up and down on my mattress. A fish, I have zero connection with the fish. Even though I see it, it's right there, right in front of me. That was the brah of Yakov to his grandchildren. You'll be like a fish on land. That means the nations see us. They look at us. Remember we were speaking about yesterday in Shir. Imagine a non-Jew walking into, we were talking about this, a non-Jew walks into a Jewish home. The first thing you notice is that by every sink, there's a big doublehandled cup. And they must think we're a bunch of, you know, like being in a German beer hall where there's a mug in every room for the Jews. What What does he He has no idea what that is. A non-Jew that walks into a Friday night meal, a Shabas meal. What does he see? A bunch of people dressed nicely sitting around a shab sitting around a table with good food. Can he imagine what we're what we're experiencing on a Shabas? There's something that we're feeling on Shabas that you cannot identify even for ourselves. I can't explain it. But there's something happening at a Shabas table. They're looking at us. We They look at they 100,000 Jews crowd a stadium to celebrate finishing a set of books. >> Go explain a sem of shas to a Explain that to him like, "Oh yeah, well we did that. I mean, we had a party when we finished Harry Potter. You know, that's how you can't possibly. We're fish on land. They can't They see us. We look the same. Two ears, one nose. Hopefully. Yeah. We We look exactly the same. Everything about it is the same, but there's zero connection. There's zero connect. That's what the Torah is reminding you of. You're different. You're different. Don't mix. We're not interested in your values. We're not interested in your in your ideas. Don't bother us and we won't bother you. That's our attitude. Just leave us alone. Don't put us in ovens. Leave us alone and we'll all get along. That's all we're asking for. That's all we're asking for. That's the reminder. Everywhere you look, everywhere Jew looks, you see that reminder? Yeah. Somebody had a question. Yeah. Hoodie, go ahead. >> Um, so if you say, "Man, we all are we all are like fish." So then why did the why did um Jacob only bless um >> there was yo he was Yoseph's sons that's a different issue why they they were they were one of the reasons that they earned the blessing the contra one of the reasons Yoseph's sons earned the blessing is because they were living among the non-Jews and remained and remained separate the other brothers were all living in the firm community they were all living in Benabra together with Yakovino they were all together. They were all in Lakewood. Yakov Yoseph and his sons were living in Saskatchewan and they managed to maintain their Jewish identity. You're the ones you're you're ex you're exact you are the ultimate fish on land. You're the ones who manage to maintain stay separate from the other nations. >> Yeah. So be good. >> So [clears throat] if that's the case, why are we dispersed around the world and still thousands of years still dispersed. >> That's a good question. Why are we dispersed? Because we were punished in in place and thrown into and put into golos. And now we have to and now we have the challenge of maybe that's a good question. We have to maintain our Judaism even though we've been dispersed. Even >> America has been the worst of them all of the assimilation. >> Yeah. Right. Okay. That's that's that that's part of God's plan. That's part of God's plan, >> you know. That's that that's part of God's plan is he put us into exile because because now now you're going to be challenged by it. But at the end of the day, that's our whatever wherever we are and where whenever and wherever we still have that job to maintain our identity and remain separate. Realize that you're not meant to mix. Okay. Somebody has a question. Yeah, please go ahead. >> I heard we're we're kind of like octopuses. Why is why is that? >> We're like octopuses. I I don't know where you heard that. I I'm not sure. I'm not I'm not I I you know I'm not sure. I you know I don't know exactly what what the what's the source for that. >> I don't know the source. >> Maybe because we light eight candles on uh on Kaneka. That's our octo. It could be could be you know I'm not I'm not sure. >> Oh may you know what because we are above that nature. >> Number eight represents a number above nature. So, we're we're uh we're what do you call it? But that's as far as I I mean, octopus is kind of creepy if you ask me. >> I'd rather be a llama. All right. Now, take a look at um the next section over here talks about a man and woman get married and he spreads a rumor about her that that she was unfaithful. They get married. He says she she was not a virgin when he married her. And he spreads a negative report about her. And then they figure out a way they managed to give to to to to to determine that she was pure before they got married. And then he's going to be punished. Now take a look at page 1052. Look at the punishment that this man gets for spreading a bad report about his wife in Puzz 18. Uh it's on page 1052. uh four uh seven lines on the top. So it says, "What do they do with this guy after they've proven that she was pure? She had not committed adultery before marriage uh and or during the mar dur during the their marriage. So it says the elders they he first of all he's flogged he's fined he must give it to the father he spread a negative report about a pure Jewish woman of Kyama. He is not allowed to divorce her. How do you like that? His punishment fits the crime. You tried to spread a report in order that they should rule you're not allowed to remain living with her. And therefore, the punishment is now you're going to keep her. Now you're going now you have to stay with her. That's the first thing. How much does he have to pay? What is the fine? 100 pieces of 100 zoos. Now take a look. Take a look at skip down to the bottom of the page. 20 uh 28 six lines on the bottom. A man finds a young girl, a girl, he violates her forcibly. The guy raped her and she's a single woman. So the crime is not a crime that's punishable. Well, it's not a capital offense because she's not a married woman, but he violated her. So, what is his punishment? >> He pays 50. And you see over here that a verbal verbally assaulting somebody where the man tried to spread a negative report about his wife where he said it, he was much he pays a hundred. For the physical assault, it's half, which shows you that sometimes words are worse than the physical. And the idea of sticks and stones may break your bones, but names can never hurt you is simply not true because verbally it hurts a lot. The answer to your question, you're right. It would have led to something else. But it but but as as he said it, the words that he said are punishable by a 100. Turned out it wasn't true. It was a false rumor. False rumor. You pay a hundred for a physical assault. You only pay 50. One second. And everybody asks the following question. First of all, you got to pay 50. And now he has to marry her. He has to marry this girl. He violated her. He has to marry. What's the question? What are you going to ask me? Why do why would she want to marry him? I mean the guy obvious you know the answer is a a she doesn't have to marry him. He has to marry her. She has a right not to marry him. I mean after all he has demonstrated bad beats. Uh so she has a right she has a right not to marry him. Number one. Number two it doesn't have to be that he grabbed a girl in the dark in Central Park you know while she was screaming. It could be what they call nowadays they call date rape. you know, they, you know, [clears throat] he had certain ideas, she had certain ideas, but her ideas and other ideas were slightly off. >> That's all they're they are. They have known each other for a while. It's just that, you know, they like each other. They were planning on getting married. Just that he was a little uh a little more out of control than she was. They were both out of control. He was just a little more out of control. Here, the Torah says the punishment is he's going to have to marry. Why is that? Why does he have to marry her? And this is very revealing about our society. And this is also something that tells us about what the Torah says about don't mix. The answer is that there was a time in history where a girl got married and she was pure. And a girl who was not pure was considered tainted goods. There was a time in history like that. And a girl was tainted goods, she's going to have trouble getting married because why the guys are not interested. What? What? What? We're not interested that nowadays nobody cares certainly in the in the non-Jewish world nowadays and then when they ask us why is our society why do you separate why is there segre the genders are are segregated what what are you a bunch of old-fashioned middle evil medieval people the answer is yes [laughter] absolutely because we have certain values and all of these values This is only an example by the way. There's only an example there. All the values of the world today, all the values of of liberal and and and and women's right, women's liberation and all that, they're all things that are not Torah values. And in a healthy Torah world, in a healthy Torah world, the these values don't even it doesn't enter a Torah home. That's what we're fighting against. and all the values the valuelessness of the world. Marijuana is legalized. Marijuana now is legalized in a Torah home. There is no marijuana. Whether there should be or not is a different question. There is no there no drug abuse. It doesn't mean that there's none. It means that percentage-wise compared to the rest of the world, we're still holding. There have been things in things have have invaded us. uh the the the the the proliferation of of of pornography because of modern technology. So it's a problem. It's a problem. These are problems that generally we're limited today. It's a today there's much more of it. It's much more accessible today. And that's what we're trying to safeguard against all of these things. The Torah is going to mention all sorts of things that that we try to safeguard against. And the only way we could do that is the realization that we said earlier. We don't mix. We're not interested in those values. People have said, "Well, look at all the good you could do with it." You know, when when the telephone first came out, let me ask you, just a regular telephone. Oh, telephone. You know, there used to be was a time telephones were connected to a wall. Not only that, do you remember? Do you remember you actually had a dial, a telephone, a rotary? You actually had a dial. I know many of you guys have not seen that. You actually had a dial. And by the way, you remember that you dialed the phone. What happened if you got a if you got a busy signal? What did you do? You actually had a dial again. Could you believe it? >> Could you believe it? You actually had a dial again. You know, it was just But we made it. Here we are. How do you We survived it. You know, when the Let me ask a question. Before the advent of the telephone and after the advent of the telephone, was the telephone a good thing? It could be used for good things. Do you think there were more family feuds before the telephone or after the telephone? Do you think more lush and horror in the world before the telephone or after the telephone? >> Yeah, I would say after the telephone. And they're probably sisters-in-laws were able to fight more often after the phone. The answer is that like everything it could be used for the good and it could be used for it could be used positively and negatively. Snake venom also has positive uses. Snake venom has positive uses. Is it by mean? Is it a good or a bad? Well, if the snake's got his teeth in the guy's ankle, it's a bad. But if it's being used as a medication, so then it's a good. It depends how you use it. But the fact that it's available doesn't mean we have to grab it. And just as a concl I'm talking about a ball never had any phone in his house. How do you like that? He seemed to do okay. You know it's like yeah but how do you I don't have a I don't have I've never owned a portable phone. I personally have never had what do you call a a a mobile phone. I've never had a mobile phone ever. I never owned a mobile phone. People said every time people people say really they're what do you people say to me what do you do that's the most common reaction when public guys say to you what's your phone what's your number you what's your what's your mobile number I don't have one really what do you do that's what the people have reacted I I didn't say I had an oxygen shortage I said I don't have a phone you said what do you do so what do I do about what well what if people are trying to contact you so they call up the house and they leave a message like we've done for the last 30 years. And if they want to give me money, I call them back. And if they want my money, I don't call them back. What's so complicated? What's so difficult to understand? Well, what if your wife needs to get a hold of you? Well, that's why I don't have a phone. [laughter] But what if it's an emergency? Gentlemen, how many emergencies have you had on your phones? I've had two emergencies in all the years. Both because there was a mouse in the house. So if there's an emergency, you call up the secretary and the secretary sends a message to me and says, "Your wife called." And I call home and she says, "You get to the house because there's a mouse in the house." Okay, so it's an emergency. So she got a hold of me. That's okay. I said, "We survived it. We survived it. Could there are there good things?" Yes, there are good things. Are there possible drawbacks, possible pitfalls? Yeah. So, we have to be able to use it, but we don't have to grab at it just because it's available. We don't have to grab it just because we have available. And just because the world at large feels that things are important, it certainly isn't something that we that we put any weight on. All right, we continue. We're going to continue with Paris next week uh for Sunday. We have to there there's a lot more. So, we're going to have to continue a little bit when we'll have one shear next week on Paris. Then we go down to K subway. Okay, I'll see you guys. This why votes not to have long conversations with women >> among other reasons.