Teshuva 101: The 10-Day Reset - Rabbi Eitiel Goldwicht

We are entering the last week of the year and we know that it all goes it all goes after how you end it. You could have a great game or you could be down by a lot but it all comes down to the final minutes. Who's going to be the closer? Who's going to close off the game? Are we going to come into the new year that with our hands yad alona? And that's why it's already brought down in this farm that every single day of the last week of the year is sort of a tikun for every single day of the week of this past year. So this shabas that is coming upon us is going to be a tikun of all the shabases of the whole entire year. If we came in a little bit too rushed, if we came in a little bit too this two, whatever it was, this shabas is a tikun for that. This coming Sunday will be a tikun for all the Sundays, for all the Mondays. It's really an opportunity to end off the year on a tremendous high and that's what I want to focus on this coming year in the next coming minutes. There's one word that appears in this week's para again and again and that word is today. You all stand in front of the covenant that is signing with you today is speaking to everyone who's standing here in front of us today and anyone who's not in front of us today. This mitzvah that I command you today the word appears over and over again in this week's para when you're reading just Mosherenu saying today I stand in front of you today tomorrow I won't be here this is Moshe Rabenu's last day of his life parasitim He's going to give the braos to all of and he's saying you are all standing in front of us today. Listen up cuz this is the day. But theim also tell us that is reference to which is what we say right after we blow the chauffeur. Today is the day of the conception of the birth of the world. the day of creation of mankind and therefore Mosher Abenu is telling us a hint of every single rash that is about to come and that's why we know the parasitim is always the para before we're all about to stand in front of in just one week's time next week we'll discuss a little bit more about rash itself and therefore this is the day Today you have to choose between life, good or evil and death. How do we choose it? What exactly is the step to choose? Mosheru continues and he says this mitzvah that I command you today. You should know this mitzvah that I command you today. It's not a very far away mitzvah. Don't think like it's so far away. This one mitzvah is not so far away and it's not in shay that it's so far. It's not over sea. You don't have to travel to find it or you don't have to travel to America to find it. Who's going to be the one who's going to bring this to us? Rather, where is this mitzvah? It's so close. It's in your mouth. It's in your heart. And you could do it. What is this mitzvah? So Rashi says it's the mitzvah of Talmatra. But the Ramban and Moson it's a mitzvah of chuva. If I were to choose one mitzvah that is perhaps a little bit hard. If I were to choose one mitzvah to say that this is such an easy mitzvah that it's also I'm not sure if the mitzvah of chuva would have been that mitzvah. The mitzvah of chuva is the mitzvah that is the easiest one that Mosher Rabenu is telling us. This is the mitzvah also Torah. Both of those mitzvah seem to actually be a little bit harder. And therefore Mosherenu goes out of his way to tell us. You should know this mitzvah of chuva ofash of you think it's so difficult. You think it's so far. You think it's oh my goodness. How are we going to do it? We can't do it. Every single year I come to Rashashana. I make my new year resolution. I come back and I do it again. You think it's so hard to change. You think it's so hard to to become the better version of yourself. You should know it's not so hard. It's not [clears throat] so it's already inside of you. What does that mean that it's already inside of you? How do we unlock what the mitzvah of chuva is? How do we understand what it is? What exactly is chuva? How do I get to the level of chuva? Where am I going back to? What does that mean? That it's already inside of me. And I want to ask a few questions to build it up to really understand the series of days that we're entering right now. We're entering what is called the medish brings down. You should reach out to Hashem when he's around. When could you reach Hashem when he's around? When is the king so close? When is the president around? You can actually go up and say, "Excuse me, can can I ask you something? Can I talk to you? When is he so close when he is around?" These are the 10 days between. So I had a few questions at least in the Gimar it says it's the 10 days not what the moment it's a part of are they a part of it >> yes >> they are cuz it's 10 days but the med says that are between Rashashan and Yumiper which seems that Rashashan and Yum Kipper stand out they are a part of it but they're not the own entity as well and if you think about it we need to ask ourselves a few basic questions about that number one why is rashash before yipper what is rashash rashash is called yom >> yomaden it's a day of judgment do I want to come to judgment first and then to have my day of kapara repentance or wouldn't I want to have repentance first and after yum kipper you know that awesome feeling after yum kiper you're like ah we did it and like we stood and we ded and we and we said and and like we're fresh we're clean I'm ready for the din now I'm ready to go into rash hashem I'm ready to be judged I'm ready I know what I want but what do we do we sort of we have l to prepare ourselves But we start off with and that is the kickoff for our and then we're like oh we didn't make it into the not we're theim right we assume that we're the and therefore we have to do and then famous question that asked why isash before but first and then another question is rashash really part of chuva what exactly is the mitsu of chuva we're going to get into the Rambam a little bit says the Rambamitra this is a famous Ramom famous discussion says the Ramom all of the mitzvah of the Torah whether it's a mitz a positive commandment or a low if a person violates transgresses one of the commandments whether it's a positive commandment that he didn't do or whether it's what he shouldn't have done and he ended up doing it whether he did it by mistake or on purpose when he does. When he does, he needs to do and this vid is a mitzvah. It's according to the Rambam that that is a mitzvah. The mitzvah of chuva is to do vidi. And there's a few questions on this ra. Why does the raom say chuva when he does chuva? He should just say the mitzvah is chuva. And how do you do chuva is through vidi. But he says when you do chuva. It's not clear if the mitzvah of chuva is a mitzvah or not. But before we'll get to that, he says the mitzvah is the mitzvah of vidi on rashash. Are we allowed to say vidi? Do we say? We don't say vid in Russash. There is no [clears throat] vid in Russash. In fact, it's brought down that the when they brought we say and the first wanted to take it out. How could they be you're not supposed to say that's not the job of your saying you're the on the whole world. So is it part of if you don't do vidi? Why is it called part of chuv if there's no feash? Question number two. Question number three. If I have 10 days of chuva, what should the pinnacle the 10th day be called? Yom hachuva. This is it. And the final culmination should be yum hachuva. But we don't call it yom hachuva. What is the final day called? Yom. Hakipurim ya kapara it's a kapara what is the difference between chuva and kapar two different things it's a different process it's a what's going on over here so we want to try to unlock to try to understand what is the process of chuva and this is going to be something that is going to be for me when I finally understood it revolutionized my entire understanding of chuva the entire understanding of what we do on rashash. What should be my kavana? What is my aod during chuva and what should be my avod during yum kiper changed also the sukus the way we view sukus everything changes with this understanding of what yhadin are all about and how we could come more prepared for the chuva that are coming within just one week by next shabas we'll be entering rush so let's start off first of all with the rama the ram says the rama that we just read when a person does cha so then you should do vid the famous over here asks a question or sort of tries to define according to the raam is there a mitzvah to do chuva or is the mitzvah to do vidi and says them in we have three different types of mitzvah there's mitzvah that are positive commandments that you have to do I have to put on fill in every single day if I don't wear fill in one day so then I viol violated and I didn't do a commandment that I'm supposed to do. But there's another type of commandment which is not a mitzvah that I have to do but rather a mitzvah kumis that I could do which is like wearing tits. If I don't wear a four cornered garment so then I don't have to wear tits but if I'm wearing a four corner garment so then I have an opportunity to do the mitzvah of wearing the I don't have to wear a four it's only if I'm wearing a four cornered garment. There's a third level of a mitzvah, which is a mitzvah that I could do, but I might never ever do it. I don't ever have to do it. In fact, the Torah doesn't even recommend that I do it. But if I want to do something, so then I have a way how to do it. The example that the brings is the mitzvah of a get gay. A person doesn't have to get divorced just to be m the mitzvah of gay, right? We all know that I have a happy marriage. So I'm never going to do the mitzvah of gay. But if somebody for whatever reason is needs to go through the process of breaking up the marriage. So then there is a process there's a whole there's in the Torah of how to do it of right of how to do it. Also I don't have to eat meat. I don't have to eat meat. I can be a vegetarian. But if I want to eat meat, there's a mitzvah of how to we have a home of how to do it. What's kosher? What's not kosher? So those are all mitzvah that are not even a mitzvah. It's only if I want to do it. Says the that it seems that the raam holds that the mitzvah of chuva is on that level that you don't have to do chuva. If you do chuva chuva, so then you do it with vidi. But you don't have to do it. It's up to you to choose to do it or not. Yeah. All the asking him how could that be? Because you see all the say in this week's you'll return. You also have them in vice the para of chuva over there in vice because of all the that hashem will bring us back and that we will come back and all the in two weeks the nim are speaking about how can it be that the ra holds that there is no mitzvah of cha it can't be and in fact if you look at the ram in the next par or in per yeah yeah if you look at the ram in per bal He says, he speaks about and that you have to do chuva speaks about this a lot. If you look in in Alachuva, he has a whole a whole mammar defending the Ramba from the question that it can't be it can't be that the Ram holds that it doesn't have a mitzvah of chuva. There has to be a mitzvah of chuva. In fact, he quotes if you look in the introduction to chuva. There's that one line of what is the that comes from the Rama himself in the introduction that the person will do chuva and we'll do vidi and he says that it's and that's another question why does it say that it's so we're really trying to unlock it and I want to learn it from within the raam what exactly is the process of chuva that we're doing what is rashashana what is chuva what is yum kipper how do they all fit into one system in order to understand that we have to give an introduction that there's really two operating [clears throat] systems in amisrael one is an operating system that is very precise you need to be of a certain age when you come into training you're 25 years old when you come into training you're 30 when you started you have to wear very set clothing you have a very set position in a very set location you work for one week during the year twice. So you end up working twice during the year but that's it. That is your special mishit your special job is very very precise. There's a very clear order. That system goes from father to son. You can't just want it and be a part of it. It gets passed down in in a legacy. And that's the system of kohanim. The kohanim are born into this family. They work in the BA mikdash. They each have their set job. They know what they're doing. There's very clear directions of what to do, what not to do. If you transgress it, it could be mikdash. You could be very very exact. How do you do? Your mindset needs to be very much in line. That is called the Torah's kohan. In all of the book of Torah's kohan which is the pinnacle and the center of the entire five books of Moshe it's called safer vayikra we built the mishkan the mishkan now we're traveling with the mishk this is the pinnacle of aod of am is in safer the word chuva appears how many times >> zero the word chuva does not appear in all of paras and yum kipper and all of those things. The only words that appear is we'll give you a kapar. No word of cha. There's another operating system. That operating system is totally different. It's an operating system that the leaders of it could be men, could be women, could be older, could be younger. They don't wear set clothing. They don't have a set space and location in which they operate within. They operate throughout all of the land of Arat Israel and it can appear throughout different generations. That operating system is called the Nvim, the prophets. We had male prophets, we had female prophets, sits, how do you say, prophetic? Theim always spoke about the would say I don't need this operating system of all the corbanos and all the thing if there is no chuva you need to have chuva moher raenu when he acted as a cohen we know mosher rabenu was a coin for for seven days until he passed it over to his brother on the eighth day of the milu. When Mosherenu was in the safer of of Torah, he spoke about that is how the operating system that gave us to work and to fix and to cleanse the spiritual sins and layers that we've created, it works through the operating system of Torah. Just like there's laws of nature, there are laws of spiritual nature that Hashem created in the world. And therefore we create spiritual filth by doing of there's an operating system of kanim of kapara of cleansing it in through the b mikdash through the carbanos it works just like the laws of nature there's no cha there when mosherenu enters safer the last month and a week of his life and specifically the last day of his life he becomes mosha raenu mosha our teacher Moshe becomes wears on the hat of being the Na'vi and the Na'vi and the Naveim speak about Chuva. The Ramba in per of Chuva [clears throat] also brings us down. If we say about the Rama, I'm talking about says the Rambuv will only be if we do chuva. And the Torah in this week's para promises us that we will do you're going to return back to the Ram speaks about chuva and it's in the sense of by the way in our I don't know if you ever noticed this when we enter the in the regular weekday. We start off with number one, you have to have a mench. You have to be a person that thinks. You have to have number two is we have the wordashu which is and it says but there is no in that the next is which is what we say on oner and we add which is theap. So we see that it's also two different systems. What is going on over here? What is this operating system that we're entering here? Here it is. Imagine there is. Imagine there's a couple. First of all, and we mentioned this last week, there's a couple or it could be parents and children and the the the husband wants to make a special birthday party for his wife and he's planning a whole big to-do. It's a special birthday. He's going to do something special for her. The children are planning a special birthday party for anniversary party for their parents or for one of for their mom. Okay. But unfortunately, there was a little bit of a fight. Now, something happened even though the husband is planning such a great anniversary party for his wife. There was a fight and the fight was like they're not they're really upset. She got really insulted. He said something this. She got upset. He he he knows that she's upset. He doesn't know why she's upset. He's upset that she's upset. And it got worse. and they're all upset and therefore they're not talking now or they're having a hard time talking next to one another. So, what does he need to do? Does he need to just prepare for the birthday party more, buy a bigger cake, plan the trip better? That won't [clears throat] help because you're going to make it to the actual birthday party and they maybe they'll they may not even show up. And even if they do show up, there'll be no no Kirava there. There will be no connection there. There will be no relationship. There will be no you know what the whole relationship is all about. It's not about doing just like the birthday cake and the action and and the vacation. If there's no connection the whole the whole nishama of the entire event is not there. And therefore I feel like we we wasted that that opportunity. We're on our way towards the rebirth and the reconnection with all of our relationships, specifically with the relationship with that's what happens every single year in Russashan. And imagine there's a couple that is actually having a hard time and they're fighting with one another and they're having a hard time connecting and they go to speak to the rough they go to speak to the rabbi and they're arguing and they're this and she never listens to what I say. She doesn't respect me. Oh, he does what he wants and he doesn't understand. Whatever it is, they're trying to work it out. They're arguing. They're fighting. So, the rabbi asked them. I don't understand. Why are you guys here? So, it goes quiet for a minute. And then the woman says, "Well, we want to know. We want to know if if we have a chance, if you could help us mend the relationship." So he said, "Okay, so I have I have one question that you both need to answer individually. Is this relationship important to you? Are you willing to invest in it? Are you are you ready to come into this meeting with the mindset of it's important to us? We're all in. We're investing in this relationship. We want to see it grow." And then it goes quiet for another minute. and he's waiting to hear from both the husband and the wife that they both say yes this is important to me. The moment they both say this relationship is important to me. He says okay now we have what to work with. What is rashashana called in the Torah? What is the it doesn't say the word rashash in the Torah. says it's also called that's right but and this shabas this say it's called in the we change it from to because we don't blow the chauffeur on rash that falls out on shabas so it comes from the day of the to the day to the to remembering the trua what is the word why is it not yom What does the word mean? So there's a rash paras where bum is giving the curses to Israel which ends up becoming blessings. So he says um right when he's looking at he says is a a friend the wordim symbolizes the ultimate connection the bra that we give to a couple under the it's it's a that's That's a real they're becoming two. It's one really it's two halves of one is becoming one is really a day of reconnecting and saying that this relationship is important to me. When we blow the chauffear is Rashashana one of us. Why is Rashashana before you kipper says the Rambam in Peric B? What is says the rama in paraglid and we know there's a whole there's a there's hilar there's hil chauffer there's a whole set of which chauffeur is kosher which chauffeur is not kosher how to blow it and over there the raam does not mention what the rama mentions in chuva paragimal in paraglimal it says the raish chauffeur even though that it's that you have to blow chauffeur on it's one of the operating systems of spiritual system wake up people who are sleeping what's the difference between and near is somebody who went to sleep by the end of the day so wake up some people left they said I had too much pain for me in Judaism I'm going to sleep. I want I want to ignore it. There are other people they come to this year. They really want to stay up. They're like, I came to learn Torah. I'm in the Domish. Obviously, not in this year. And this year, everyone is up all the time, right? Means that I want to stay up. But that he he fell he fell asleep. I fell on top of me. But says around this is the main is a wake up look inside your heart. He's saying do chuva. The chauffar is part of waking us up to do chuva. How is it waking us up to do chuva? I'm not saying vi. It's part of make chuva but it's not the vidi part. The first stage of doing chuva. The first stage of mending a relationship that was broken is saying I'm in. This relationship is important to me. When when I'm blowing the sound of the chauffeur, I'm saying you're my meal. You on this day, the first day of creation of humanity, what did you do? You believed in us and humanity. You blew a living soul into humanity and you said I believe in humanity and you will be my partners in this world and you will glorify my name in this world. You blew the first chauffeur on this day believing in us. Hashem we are blowing back the chauffeur to you. We believe in you. This relationship is important to us. Hashem says this relationship is important to me every year on Rashashana because he says this is the day that I infused life in you. Are you saying that this relationship is important to you as well? I need both husband and wife. I need both of them to say that this relationship is important to me. If both of them are saying that's stage number one, but that's not enough. They were in a fight. The man said something not appropriate. The woman said something not appropriate. They didn't respect each other the fullest. They they got their emotions ahead of themselves, the ego a little bit ahead of themselves. So first, the fact that they both said that it's important to them. That already creates a certain calm. Let's work this through. Now, let's work this through. How do we work this through? Each person needs to look inside. What What did I do wrong? Where did I where did I go wrong? What did I say wrong? This is not the type of person I want to be. This is not the type of how I want to speak. I love my wife. I love Hashem. I got distracted. I was too busy at work. I had too much. I had too much uh other factors. So when I came home, I let out the stress and I said something inappropriately and I didn't I wasn't in my regular calm way and therefore it spiraled into something that wasn't appropriate. I got too distracted. So, I ended up doing things and wasting my time on the phone or on the computer and looking at things that are not appropriate, saying things against other Jews because I got so heated up about something that it hurt me emotionally. So, I spoke negative about another Jew, about another segment of Am Israel. This is not who I want to be. That's not the type of person I want to be. So, I need to do inner work. The inner work in a certain way is I do not want to be this type of person. Goes in retrospect that's called I regret that I ever did this. It's in the present. I'm not going to do this again. And it's I will not do this in the future as well. So therefore it's saying I want to be a different types of a different type of person. That's what happens during after we do we start doing the inner work of becoming the better version of who we want to be. The mitzvah of chuva is not so far away because the mitzvah of chuva is not yet the mitzvah of kapara. The mitzvah of chuva in its core is saying am I in or am I [clears throat] not? The mitzvah of a chuva is all you want to you just need to want to be a part of this relationship and that's already the initial steps of chuva is you need to do inner work. We start saying, we start singing theos. We start apologizing to our friends. And then comes yakipur. Yakipurim is the converge the the meeting of the world of chuva and the world of kapara. The world of chuva of the naveim and the world of kapara of Torah's kohanim of the priests and that it comes together and that's when it comes into a full complete session. How does that work? It's not enough to just feel bad. The couple they they they both say they're in and then they each are doing inner introspection of how they can become better. You need to communicate to the other person. You need to say I'm sorry. And by the way, it's not enough to say I'm sorry. You need to say I'm sorry that I hurt you. It's three different steps. You need to include yourself, you need to include the regret, and you need to include you. Because many people, they say, "I'm sorry you got hurt." They don't include themselves in it. >> I'm sorry I hurt you. >> Or, "I'm sorry I hurt you." Then they're not including what they did. They're not really saying, "I'm sorry I hurt you in this way." >> Have to say, "Will you forgive me?" >> You You don't have to say that. You don't have to say, "Will you forgive me?" They could come and and they'll say that, but you need all three parts. And that's really what the ultimate vid is. Please, Hashem, I'm the one who sinned. I'm taking responsibility for the mistake that I've done and I've done it in front of you. And that's why we have halahos of how to do vidi because the moment I do vidi I'm entering the realm of toas kohanim there's a system in the ba mikdash of how you do vidi it's very very organized and that's why kipper it's called seder aod the seder of our aod of how we're going to be doing this it's mess and therefore you have to do it with this carbon and this carbon and how to do it nowadays we don't have the carbon of of the sedu so we just say it but what do we have says the rama you say why is the raing and the raom also says and then he says when do you do so you do vid before but he says that's not philosoph telling me he has to say that it could be just say say and and there's a there's a discussion if a person forgot to say the vid of yipper Does he need to repeat all of or just the vidi? According to the ra it seems that vidi can only be said while you're ding in the and therefore you have to repeat all of the of yum kiper again in order to say the vid. Why is that? Because the only thing we have left in our operating system of Kahuna once the BA mikdash has been destroyed, the only thing we have left where we are like we are in the BA mikdash is the way the tour describes the moment you walk into and we have of how to d when you have to have this a covering maybe a belt. There's of how a person should be dressed when he walks into more than when he says there's different between is like the highest level. You're walking into the Bdish to have a conversation with you're entering when you into the you yourself are the you yourself are saying vidi for yourself for your family and for the entire amrael and when you say vidi you're going into the operating system of kapara kapara is completes the system of chuva. That's why it's part of chuva, but it has a different name because we're doing a different kapara means to wipe clean. And this is something that was to wipe clean. What does that mean to wipe it clean? We live the whole year in a system of seven days. The number seven, the maral explains, is physical. Anything that is physical has six sides to it. like a cube. You have four sides and you have the top and the bottom. Number seven is the theimi inside the physicality. That's why the seventh day you're eating physical food, but you're like, "Ah, this is amazing." For and it's not just a physical union between man and wife. It's a spiritual and physical union between man and wife. Right? Shiva. You're sitting Shiva. When an ashama goes up, you're not just celebrating the life, the physical life, but you're celebrating what he represented, who he was. You're always, it's always something physical with kadusha in it. Any number seven, that's why has many shiva. It's a physical land, but with shiva meaning it has a spiritual energy to it. The entire number that's number seven. In the world of physical, even when it has kadusha in it, I remember when we were kids, this is the mush I always like to bring when we were kids. My mother had a certain vase at home and therefore she always said I'm assuming the mothers here say the same rule. I know my wife has the same rule in our house today. No playing ball in the house. >> Right? Does that rule sound the kids have this tya? I had a tya to play ball in the house cuz you can't go out. You're locked in. No playing ball in that. You want to play ball maybe in the basement. Maybe if you have a different room. No playing ball in the house. We're good kids. We really want to listen. But sometimes we forget. We forgot we played ball. Of course, we're not going to break anything because we know how to play catch the best. We're never going to drop the ball. We're never going to get carried out. We could do it and get away with it and no one will know and it's going to be okay. Just like we always think. We get ahead of ourselves. But suddenly me and my brother are playing ball. We're playing catch and the vase breaks. Special vase. A vase from my mother's mother, grandmother. It meant a lot to her. Mother's upset. We're upset. We get scolded. We go to our room. We We have to We come back. We do vidi. We really mean it. We really feel bad. We feel bad. We say, "We're sorry. We did it. We didn't mean to. We'll buy you new one. It's okay. It's okay. I got over it." Ima forgives us. We're back to that relationship. Everything is great. We're right. It happens to all of us. This this part of our life. part of our life is is going through sometimes breakups and and then we get back together and it's and it's amazing. Even though Emma forgave us, what happened to the vase? It's not here. It's broken. Can't bring it back. That is in the realm of seven. We could do chuva all year long if we want to chuva. We have a process how to do it. Go through the same process. You do chuva, you say, "I want to be better." And you say, you say, you could do chuva all year round. But when yum kipper comes in, there's a mitzvah to do on otherwise you're going to miss the opportunity that yum kipper brings, which is an opportunity of kap and that's why in par that's when the ram says you have to do chuva on yum kipper and you can't wait for a different day. Why is that? Because when you enter Kipper, it's the pinnacle of not a system of seven, but a system of 10. The system of 10 is the mamaros. Hashem created the world with 10 attributes of speech. 10 is a new creation. When amara as a makos against the mitim that taught amit, we get the the ten commands. Number 10 is a new creation. Those are we add in the ultimate of Hashem the it's the higher level of what Hashem really wants to create in the world of 10. Hashem tells us through theem your the way you think and the way you operate is not the way I operate says Hashem. The way you act is not the way I act says Hashemos. Because when you go through this process of Hashem, I want to be part of this relationship. Hashem, I feel so bad and I'm sorry. And then you say the wordap comes and what does kapara mean? It means cleansing it all out. It's I'm wiping it clean like it never happened. It never broke. When we do chuva the entire process the way this is it so Hashem comes and says it's not broken the entire the vase comes back to life as if it never broke that is the ultimate process of chuva that we're going through so we have a chuva rashashana is part of it yipper is part of it but they have a different element than the rest of the chuva rashash is just about saying hashem you're the king of this world this relationship is important to me. I want to be a part of it. That's the chauffear. I want to be better. All I need to do is just to turn means just to turn back. You turned your back on me. You're going in one direction. All it means is turning back and where I want to go. I want to go back towards you. It's not actually I didn't change anything yet. I'm still the same person. Nothing. What changed from one day to the next? All I did was turn around. The turning around is the bashimi. It's not bashi to turn around. All you need to do is turn around and then you got to go through the process. That's already harder cuz then you have to be a little bit more vulnerable, a little bit more open. You have to admit where you made mistakes. That's hard for us as human beings. I never make mistakes. And once you go through that inner process, you can actually verbalize it and say it with words. I made a mistake. Once we go back, the relationship goes to a whole new level. It's as if we've never sinned and says, "Come here. I want to give you a hug." That's the suka. The suka is really a hug. On the final day of sukus, we have which is the day of the aros are lips. It's not just a hug, there's a kiss. And after that we go into which is who sends away all the and he says I want just me and you me and Kessus Israel alone together we go into the and we start dancing and we're celebrating with the Torah and then we go into an unbelievable new year a year of closeness of and that's really what it is we're living for. We're living to live a life of feeling that and when we when we're z to it. There might be moments where we feel it. It just fills us up. The way the Rambam describes it, it's like a person who's madly in love. Madly in love. A young couple. And this young man is in love with this girl. And so he's just like it it engulfves him. The aa of Hashem is so great. It's so beautiful that when we enter Yum Kipper, it's not a day of fear and a day of of sadness. It's a day of sim that there's aos and once we know that operating system and we're bringing together the chuva and the kapara we're coming into these days with sima with excitement of course there's awe of course there is like am I am I doing it or not and the awe is there to wake us up to hear the chauffeur to wake up don't just think that it's another day another thing there's such a unique opportunity wake up go and see seize your moment When we come in with that mindset, we're coming in ready to that birthday party all prepared. We're coming to that birthday party not just buying a bigger cake. We're coming to the birthday party having thought about how to mend our relationship and having a road map of actually how to do it. a road map of Rashashana that's followed by sukus and that will lead us to an unbelievable new