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Pesach: Overview of the Seder - Rabbi Reuven Lauffer

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Hidabroot - Torah & Judaism

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[Music] so let's have a look everybody you're familiar with it with the format of the Seder hopefully yeah you know what I say the what it looks like so just towards beginning of the Seder we have this rather strange interlude which we'll talk about it mr. Shen laughter what's it doing here but we've got these four sons which don't really seem to fit into the story of the exodus per se so let's have a look and see it sounds like this can negate a bourbon in Debrett oh the toast beef stew for different children and the four different sounds that are here are very very different I destruc- a berber ninja berto where do you trust it about four sons know it we're going to see in a minute can I get out but Bonnie did what are those mean the Torah speaks about four sons me the toy speaks to four sons the time to consider the the brisker of cells like this very beautiful idea can negate are born in Debrett oh you've got four different sons they're all very very different personality wise so you've got a hawk on a wise guy right you gotta Russia who's a wicked guy you've got a Tom who's a simple thing and then you've got to share any a daily show which is kind of difficult to define in one word and so says the brisker of the most beautiful idea can i get a bubonic diverter oh that's the same Torah speaks to every single child you've got very very different personalities over here and yet the tour is going to speak to every single one and then he adds a sentence which i think is absolutely fundamental if you've got a son if you got a child who's not hearing what the Torah is saying it's not a problem with the Torah more often than not it's a problem with the way that the information is being passed across we take that it's the truth is it's a very it really it's it's absolutely basic it really is very often we say to ourselves are you know this kid this kid is like a lost cause he doesn't want to listen he's not interested but maybe we would stop and think just for a minute right maybe the problem I mean obviously the kids find the kid has his own issues right but maybe the problem really rests inside of how we give across information right every single kid is different here you know right Michael you've been involved in teaching you see perfectly well that you can't you can't especially when you're chilly 101 you can't teach each kid the same way it doesn't doesn't work you know this kid prefers this this kid prefers that Liske is not interested at all right there is a commonality among all kids though if you can make them laugh you can engage involve interesting good very good right but again one good once you've got the laughing though what once you wanting begin to realize that what you've got to teach is interesting you still have to adapt to each kids personality right to same with Parenthood as well and Parenthood's even even more acute than that you know every single kid is different like we have over here these are four sons and yet they're very very different it's have a look and see what we've got come along now let's start with a half right the wise guy what does he say so he's a white this kid is wise so we're gonna have to try to understand where is the wisdom in his question let's have a look and see my ADA's faculty lavish party my should see my shammy look into his him what what's he asking he's asking what is all this stuff right what what is all this stuff that you're doing so I'm a little bit stuck over here because white white for two reasons first of all he's supposed to be a hum well where is the Hoffman side of his question where's the wisdom inside of his questions curiosity go curiosity let's have a look and see let's jump to the rush and have a look and see because in a minute we'll see if it comes even more acute the question right Russia malwa mayor what does a washer say the rush is a wicked guy right Matt avoid that as always liked him what's he asking just in different words he's saying what's all this stuff that you're doing oh goody nice little bit no but the first one is not always saying oh what's this what he's wondering what's the reason behind the work and that's my saying I do stuff king you never see my mother it doesn't look as you work okay good russia and looking at work why are you doing this work leave it alone good very good okay so we've got over here to it it's two different it's two different clothing wise i seen how do we fulfill the obligation of people no snoring you're being a little bit flexible with the words over here which is fine because okay the guys are Holcomb so we're trying to work out where where's the Hoffman side of the question right right so now I have another question I we have non to this one yet but I have another question right what is he asked akamaru in there my agents are cooking when we spotted machete version with cameras have what is all the stuff that you're doing right then it finally breaks it down and it doesn't call it a voyeur which is true but where's the Hosmer listen to the answer the otha Terry Malloy you should say to him killed was a piece on aim of tuna someplace I have you caught me you know that you can't eat after the afikomen it's not cleaner I don't know that's what it says it sounds like what the father's got one answer and hopefully one of the kids is going to ask the right question at some point right so the hokum says what is all this stuff you're doing and the father says you know you can't eat after the afikomen and I thought I was like oh okay that's great the star sent notices a house Alicia Alicia rabbit the second rebbe from gore has a different approach and we'll see from that will see from the approach of the Sun centers will see the harm of the question and we'll see how the answer answers the question it really does right this famous puts all of the emphasis of the Hoffmans question on to one word Siva right Holcomb oh and what is the hokum same re dude by mukki lavish party Masha teva and Cheryl okay no attempt why does God have to command us to keep the mixes I love God I just want to do what God you know I want to do what God wants minute it was called the rots in the rots and I shared their at son of god I just want to do it right why have to be commanded to do it why can't i work this out by myself why you know why can't this just why can't I should just suggest that this is what we need to do it's interesting somebody came up with an interesting phrase at different different different serve place she said that our cottage boho never a quarry never asks a Cornish vocal always commands which means that the the dynamics of our relationship with our college ball call is a dynamic of we need flood what are the midsole Commandments right so says it says that says it's fast and how come over here is asking a very fundamental question a very beautiful question why do we have to be commanded to keep the missus why can't we just keep them because that's what we want to do why can't we keep them because I love our share and I've worked out this what a sham wants me to do so I'm going to keep it and I'm going to be I'm going to be happy and will be thrilled to be able to do it so now we understand the depth of the question let's go back and see what the answer is what what is he on to the father says you know that you can't eat after the afikomen can't eat anything you know what the father's teaching his son over here again a very beautiful idea logical are logical no he's saying like this listen to what he did you say not all the commandments a logic value oh good very good right huh well I'm sorry I didn't hear the knot I feel instead of all the commandments are logical which is actually the way that you're laughing right now is probably exactly what you said and now you just jumping on to the fact yeah okay whatever I know hours to go all the commands we have and how can you even think logically there's a whole bunch of comments at a cool wat whoo kid right what's a hog cocky the statute right we don't understand we just do them like parada more like a para do melons classic hog but how about a clock for pesach why do we eat the afikomen nobody wants to eat the afikomen on pacer right what have we just done we've eaten to cause a sim of matzah at the beginning of the seuda of the meal right we've eaten a cause I said matzo together with a cause I said Morrel when we ate the curriculum you ate the sandwich we've eaten a suitor a meal and now at the end of all of this what are we going to do we're going to eat the African what's the afikomen more matter no one would volunteer to do something like that even if the matter was good right at the beginning but you know what you're stuffed you don't want to eat anymore why we eating more simply because I krrish baulkham commanded us to do it hear what the father's teaching his son the most incredible little lesson the father is telling his son it's true that if you love a sham you'll be able to do all kinds of mrs. but there'll be all kinds of mitzvahs that you won't be able to do because it won't occur to you that you're supposed to do them because they're cooking the statutes they're not logical they're they're simply because a college bar who once asked to perform his desire so now we've got we've got a great question and we got a great answer even at the beginning it didn't sound like it and now we can move on to the Russia Russia mauboy there and now we see the fundamental difference between the question of the hustle and the question of the Russia what does he say mar void as I second what is all this stuff that you're doing avoidable da is something which is a burden right all work is a burden right like coming in here 00 work I once saw a bumper sticker on a car in London it said a bad day at the beach it's still better than a good day at the office think about it have my avoid as I saw him what what is it what is all this stuff that you're doing Lock em the loloi he's excluding himself from the whole thing over here Lock em means you people not us right all official ideas at swim in iCloud cough up the account because he's excluded himself and everybody else so he's a cough Rebecca he's either this is my very harsh language he's a very naughty boy the Aqua Takeshi now they're moly so you should put his teeth on edge yes understand just picture what's going on you're at the Seder right this is really offensive what's going to happen now everyone's got to say that everyone's everybody's this thing it's all very beautiful and then this kid turns around I mean he's being very he's being very confrontational right you know what is what is all this stuff you're doing right and you say but I was there a shot I / Emily but tasty me me trying you know why we're here tonight because this is what God did for me we left Egypt Lee below like me not him he's not even referring to him directly write me not him iluu hashem if he would have been there lion eagle he would never have been redeemed that's pretty offensive I mean it's true that the question of the Russia is more offensive question is why why why is he doing this and why is the father why is her father doing this so the the clue to what's going on is the words are catchy nav means put it i mean i catching up he's put his teeth on edge when you've got somebody who's super cynical somebody who's super disinterested you know it's kind of it's kind of a paradox but sometimes the only way that you can make a dialogue with somebody like that is by getting them angry otherwise nothing bothers them they just keep going that you know that they're completely covered in a hard outer shell and you can't get through the only way to get through is to be offensive and if you can get him angry then maybe he'll start talking there's no shower no one Brussels 80 right crank you cranked through and that's it and now the person pops out yeah then when a person is letting else in Asia might be able to doing something yes very good right so over here I can't chena put it but right his vessel there is the shabalala kit which is one of one of the classic commentaries he says something which is rather odd I wouldn't really recommend it to anybody over here but if you do do it I'd like to know how it went he says how catchy nothing's punch out his teeth how's that how's that for huh that's the little that's a literal meaning but it's not I mean in the context over here it just means put his teeth on edge what the chevallier like it says most incredible thing he says maha void that a lot like him what is it avoider that the russia is talking about what is this hard work that the Russia's talking about ah but here now in contests el aceite what is it a certain though the hallways your city girl oh right carlin why is he there cuz he what he wants to get to the seuda he wants to get to the real right he's interested in the Canadian that interested in that the story that comes before it says he's slowly I make it I cared she now if the only way the only reason he's there is to eat so punch him in the mouth and that way you won't better eaten it'll serve him right again I don't recommend that you do this but if you do let me know how it went okay it's a cure of a cure of taking me in question yeah why is it that is just songs asking questions why isn't any daughters asking question the other side is that the it really it's just like a generic thing banning our children write in hebrew grammar the minute you've got you can have like you know ten women and one man and then you'll use the masculine to to address them all to speak them all over here when it talks about arbor born in Debrett hora i don't think i don't think it's you know again the valley god who is trying to get across a lesson of we're going to see him into shell nose enormous enormous significance and you know i don't i don't think he's I don't think he's suggesting that there are no girls that the say that there are no daughters at the Seder is just a generic term that's actually one time that grows and mostly participate as soon as you've meant if you if you look at people's houses and stuff like that the woman also me that God out of the womb and also drink the focus of everything is done the same one thing is the show the shanial Daily Show can only be a boy not a girl kiss girls never start they never stop asking girls always talking they're always right so here's a nice talking about anyway so strong woman malicious bosses you're sure again it's taking its it's like you know and you understand is taking a concept right I'm trying to give over a lesson which emits a sham well we'll look at we'll see can now I'm air right a simpleton what does he say Mars art what what is this now your understand this is just it's such a superficial question you've got a wholesaler sitting over there in front of you you got all the people you've got all the monsters and you've got the wine and you've got the Seder Plate you got everything tables groaning under the weight of everything that's there and his kid looks and he says Mars eyes it's like it's such a it's a real superficial question mozzies by market love you should say Tim but who's a yard itn who I shaming me time you betta Oh Tim I got his vocal took us out of slavery now you have to understand so it's very interesting right you would imagine that the father has got he's got a whole bunch of things he's got prepared over here to say and he's pretty excited about lella say though you know he's going to have all this wonderful opportunity to me I would to inter interact with his children and to be able to bond together with them and the ballet gutter is teaching us the most incredible little lesson over here you need to answer the question that was asked he asked a very superficial question so you have to give him an easy answer right you may have the most wonderful answer you know missouri's and you're going to talk about the philosophical underpinnings of the whole of the of the exodus and everything that I say that counts for and what it what is supposed to mean to us and this kid he's not he's not gonna pick up what you're saying like Maslow's white why we hear what's going on so the answer is because yeah I cottage bottle too because that read you it's an easy question and it requires an easy answer right don't get involved in all kinds of things that your kids not gonna be able to fit pick up we're gonna come back to all of this and it's a shed the show any a daily show the one who doesn't know how to ask a now this kitty he's like he's really sad right if there is a time of the simpleton is sad this kid is really sad because he's sitting at the Seder and he doesn't even know that he's supposed to ask something like you know say tonight is like a completely abnormal night nothing nothing is the same as it normally is right everything is different and the kid doesn't even understand that he's supposed to ask a question so says the ballet go that act of Sakura you need to open him up right of course all the forum all of the commentaries get very excited because at pasar koi is the feminine at it should say at a tip tackle you should open it up you win the masculine right because it's talking to the Father presumably right so what's the idea the idea of you here is something again something very very fundamental a share any a daily show he maybe I don't know how old he is right he could be a very small kid or he could be a very old kid he could be 45 years old and yet he doesn't know that he's supposed to be asking questions over here the formative years of a small child it's normally the mother that's doing the educating I know why is that first of all mothers have the most incredible intuition for their children they under you know before they even start talking about you ever seen as you know mothers and fathers with their little Chuck little kid the kid says Gaga goo goo goo goo gah writing on the father the father says you know what it was talking about I what was I mean and I mother says no you just wants to know where his pacifier is you know that's like I don't know mothers mothers have this incredible intuition to be able to understand what the kids are saying mothers also have the most incredible patience right you know the father sitting down with a six month old kid all he wants to do is start you know playing playing rating cars with him and you know and toy trains and things and their kids just lying lying on the lying on the ground of you know googling and that's it's a year so that bad i got was saying like this this guide the seder he may be he may be 50 years old but he's like a little baby and if he's like a little baby at Pissarro you've gotta relate to him like a mother relates to her children you've got to have patience for him you've got to what try to understand what it is and he's trying to say even though he doesn't know how to articulate it right and then that's why that's how you're gonna get through it you got to get him to try to react you've got to get in to try and come up with something right at softly the problem is though it doesn't seem a face value it doesn't seem that we're told how to do that shaniyah mavi gathered a vin caballo male more bubbles alpha assembly but a team you it's fine so we telling me no we're here because I college boy who God took us out of Egypt here so let me ask me ask you a question and don't don't behave like they share any a daily show all right let me ask you a question the the mitzvot of Laila Seder is what's called sip or UT ask me trying to tell over the story of the exodus in Egypt let's Pierre right why is this book called a hug order it should really be called safer support as me try no story The Legend Haggard I'll let her get you can you could tie it into like it you can tie it into a garota you can tie it into lots of things but if we're talking if we've got a book which has been given to us in order to fulfill the mitzvot of the night right the midst of the night is supported CS meter says Rebbe Avram then I grew up the son of the Vilna Gaon he says like this the word for he gerotor right what does it say the process of the gala to live in Hawaii moho the would-be gallatin means something new how do you do it with a daily show somebody doesn't he doesn't even always supposed to ask you have to stimulate him intellectually right so you tell over a neat little vote a neat little idea no reaction don't tell it over again don't repeat it over and over move on to something else did that work it didn't work go on to something else keep a flow of new fresh ideas coming out in the hope that at some point something is going to cause him to react here the he gather to live in ok and that's why this book is called a hair goddess right well what we're being taught there's like a subliminal message over here that within the Haggadah don't stick just to the text tell all of the story of course you got to tell them what's written up what's written over here but inside of what's written over here pitch the story to the people who are there pitch it to their level add in all kinds of things I heard from two of the biggest talladega Colin two of the biggest Talmud scholars out here in Jerusalem and they both of them to independently of each other each one that on Lamar sailor you know what they do before before pays off they go and they look up various midrashim and on Laila Seder they tell over the text of the Haggadah and they add in all kinds of interesting ideas from the major asian from the AG a letter in order to stay emulate the people that are there because the mitzvah of levis ADA is not to have a philosophical theological discussion about Judaism and about you'd see asked me trying and about everything that took that you can do all the Pesach the midst of Laila sailor is to tell over the story of the exodus that's what we're supposed to do which means that you know sometimes you got to a sailor maybe maybe at the Seder there'll be some kind of you know they'll be discussing some kind of halacha coin getting very involved over there and but that's not the function of that I said at the function of leather cetera is to tell over the story sip or it's the asthma train needs to be something which is going to stimulate them at least for something which is going to be exciting for them so so far so good we understand we've got four sons and we understand that these four sons are now asking each why each one's asking in their own way it's interesting that i think i think the rash boss says one of the early authority says that the word are dumb I loved allied men which means a person is the same numerical value as a word math which means what 45 and you know a person through the questions that they asked these questions are very revealing over here okay we understand the hokum he really is a hug him in the Russia really is a Russia and the time really is a time and they share any daily show well Malvin was a yeah somebody lived almost 200 years ago the mob we lived in it in it in an era of the most extraordinary upheaval within the Jewish world he fought tooth and nail against what was called by a scholar the Enlightenment movement the mild Avast most incredible question over here he said like this he said I'll our Seder say tonight is a night of opposite right so you've got freedom and slavery you've got questions and answers you right he says when you read through the order of these four sons they're not that they're in a very strange order what is the opposite of a thumb Russia no Shalee your daily show doesn't satanic my warn their soccer mom would know the opposite of a call from the opposite of a wise person is somebody doesn't even know how to ask right and the opposite of a term which is a simpleton a naive person is who is a Russia Russia's always plotting always planning says the mob if the real order over here should be how come my warm air we share a near daily show at SAC lowly Tom mal y mer Russia my way man said the Russia should be at the yet because he's really the least deserving why did the BAL I gotta feel fit to change the order around and put in her fam Russia Tom machete needed early show and the mother has a Muslim was extraordinary explanation it's something absolutely fascinating absolutely fantastic he says the whole of Jewish history is caught up inside of these four sons and in the order of the four sons says Jewish history is cyclical just keeps repeating itself over and over again we get thrown out of a country we're going to another country in the other country we stay for as many generations as we stay there and then they get tired of us and we get thrown out we have to go find another country but they don't want us in the other country either but they'll take us in up until a Holocaust if you didn't want to get thrown out of the country that you were in there was a very simple way of being able to stay there which was one convert assimilation I think back to the Spanish Inquisition right if you didn't want to lose everything that you had your business and your home and everything so you could convert you could become a Christian and that way you could stay where you were some people did it as a sham some people did it and believed in it but that that was the way if you wanted to stay in the country that's what you could do right what was that what was going on a Jewish history was like this they went into a country they established themselves sometimes they became very established and some of these people were very wealthy and they were extremely well-connected and and so and what would happen was like this so if you wanted to stay and to hold on to what you had you had to become like them otherwise what would happen you get thrown out says the man that's a generation of the haha mean look how they were wise enough to understand their relationship with our College Park who is that that's it internal that's an eternal relationship what they have right now however difficult it is to give it all up and to leave it but that's something which is temporary what's called how you sure this world are we here then it's worth giving up this world in order to be able to retain the relationship with god those are the people who understood that it was right to pick themselves up and to leave the country that they were in leave everything behind they went with nothing and to go into a different into into a different country to try to reestablish themselves and off they went and they went to re-establish themselves over there in the country that they were in and it was very very difficult they were scrambling around to make a living and they're trying to put a roof over their family's head and trying to put a little bit of food on the table and it was very very hard because when they left they couldn't take things with them could take their businesses with it and the next generation for them this was the most difficult generation of all because what are they see they see that they had their parents were very well established where they were and now simply because they're Jewish they left everything behind and now they've got to start all over again in a country where they don't speak the language that I understand the culture and they've got to start all over again and that most of the people they never they never really establish themselves properly again so the next generation say to themselves hold on a second you know what that there's an easy way out of this right which is one let's just stop being Jewish and we stopped being Jewish that we don't have to be concerned about getting thrown out of this country that we just moved into now rabbi moshe finding one of the greatest rabbis in America the previous generation the the halacha Keth ority of the Jewish world from a generation ago he said the most astonishing thing there's a phrase in Yiddish which says their shared since I'm a Yid it's difficult to be Jewish it's hard to be Jewish and in America in the 20s and the 30s people were losing their job every single week because if they want to work on Chavez they would lose their jobs and on Monday let's go look for work again and they would come home and the children would hear the parents sayings if Arizona hid that it's it's hard work being Jewish and children what did they learn from that they didn't understand that when the father who got fired from his book again was saying zeche virtually yet he's saying it it's like a proclamation there's a sense of pride in what he's saying the kids did understand that all they understood was that if it's difficult to be Jewish then maybe let's not be Jewish and it's going to be easier and says the molding that's the second generation so that's a generation of the rashan not reassuring because they're evil wicked people Rashean because they turned their backs on God and then comes the next generation why should fighting so I'm sorry why should function said that there was a whole generation was lost from that phrase of that share designer Yid our generation was gone so remote replace didn't say this but I think really what he's saying is that when these people came home on Friday after having offered jobs again what they really needed to do however hard it was was to dance around the table and to show their children that they're you know this is this is this is what we do this what we feel when we're able to sacrifice ourselves for God's commandments for what got it what for what God wants us to do the kids picked up the wrong they picked up the wrong message and a whole generation you know I don't think about American American Jewry the history of American Jewry the whole generation was lost through this and then comes the next generation a generation of the time what is the time he's a simpleton in Jewish terms he's a simpleton his parents are not Orthodox he's been brought up in a completely secular environment he's gone to a non-jewish school but he still got Orthodox grandparents and sometimes he sees his grandparents and then maybe he'll same as art if you get lucky right maybe he'll he'll pull his nose out of his iphone long enough right to say ma thought what what are these funny things that grandma and grandpa doing and then since the bulb in the next generation is what the generation has share any a daily show he doesn't even know how to ask why because his grandparents are completely religious his parents are completely religious and he's been brought up completely religious and if he still got grant grandparents that are still alive so they probably stashed away in an old-age home somewhere where he's got a connection with them ato Daily Show he doesn't even know that he's supposed to ask questions says the baliguda odds are low you've got to do the work who's are you us the Orthodox community we've got to do it there's a call earlier there the second generation become a cheers all financial oh very good right and they in their turn support Judaism for their it's a darker well working on the premise that they're still attached that they still had that connection I'll tell you a fascinating story or a barrel wine told over a story you know a barrel why needs to be a rough in Miami before you before it then he moved to New York and then he came to hear but wait way back he said like this he said that he went when he was a rub in Miami the pond amateur of who was the head of the pond amateur sheer over here right from hanuman used to come to Miami once a year to raise funds and rivera y used to drive him around and take him to the all the donors and he said he took him once to a place where it was a factory and he took him to the the owner of the factory was the grandson of the original owner and the original owner had been from and he'd given a nice sizable donation to the yeshiva every year and then his son had taken over and it's some wasn't from anymore but it's that was traditional so we you know and he kept up the tradition of giving and then they came to the grandsons now taken over and the grandsons not the least bit religious at all and the grandson tells a fun adventure of he says I don't believe in any of this stuff I really don't he says and I'm not going to give you your money I'm sorry and Rev wine said that the Potter pitcher rather go back into the car and the point of the churros started to cry so I crying like a baby and rewind said he didn't he didn't hit no water you know has supposed to react also so he said Rebbe don't worry we'll get the money from a different source so the punisher roasted the most extraordinary thing he said I don't care about the five thousand dollars that he was going to give our quarry schmuck who's gonna give us the money from another place I don't care about that he says but the only connection to Judaism that this and had left was his donation to the yeshiva and now he's stopped that as well he severed the connection why isn't old fifth son cuz she's not there which means that either ups act like I think you've done the job and he's now back in where he needs to be or there is off his son where's he gonna go where's he gonna come from right wasn't it was he gonna be from he doesn't have anything attached to anything no way of being attached at all so let's just try to work out something which is perhaps the most important dimension of all and then we'll understand why these sons are here in the haggadah what are they doing over here they don't have any then really don't have any connection to UT as me trying the story of sip for you t ask me trying so who's responsible over here let's go back and have a look the share any a daily show for sure is not responsible he he doesn't know anything for anything that's why it says apps art well you've got to do the job we the Orthodox community have to reveal something about this boy's heritage in order to allow him to be able to connect back in the town well maybe I got a small a small amount of responsibility over here maybe like maybe you should have asked a little deeper question the Mars odd whilst his grandparents were still alive to be able to try to understand who he really is so I'd ask you who's responsible most people would say for sure it's gotta be the Russia he's the one who made the decision that he's not going to do this anymore right but the Emmis it's not like that in Jewish history that's something that repeats itself over and over and again nobody halina don't understand me know was judging anything over here it's just it's just fact that when the generation of the haha me where they left the countries that they were in and they had to go and they had to work they worked unbelievable hours just to be able to pay their rent and buy food and it was it was unbelievable what was going on and they lost everything they left it all behind and they were so involved in trying to stay alive that very often the one thing they forgot to do was to educate their children and the children now they don't understand anymore they don't understand if everything is if it's also terrible being Jewish then why bother it's a good question no I'm not I'm not I'm absolutely no we're not we're not judging anybody over here first of all nervous should ever be in the position of having to experience any of this for sure for sure the language they've got no they've got no connection to the language so when you stay inside of the Jewish the Jewish communities you to speak Yiddish with each other and you everyone gets on fine but when you want to get a job somewhere outside the language the culture it's everything everything and that they were scrambling they were working hours that we you know it's not normal what they were doing but now that's we understand the most important thing of all over here what what are the four sons what are they doing here what's that function here in the Lalor Seder because Layla Seder is a night of Education Layla Seder is a night when we sit down with the children and we explain to the children why it is that we're Jewish what it is they've got a college vocal wants from us and I say who is coming to teach us that each child is our own child and each child has to be taught in the way that that child will be able to understand in order to be able to pass it over your other mission of broad sense most astonishing thing the mission process and I locked the Pacer that you should give out nuts at the Lalor Seder right in order to keep the children excited the Kimura says why do we do all kinds of things on leather Seder that the children should ask questions since when open since when are we so concerned about the children asking questions since when we still concerned about giving out nuts in order for the children to be stimulated here the chat is because Layla Seder is all about laying down foundations for our identity our national identity and our individual identity as well in my home we don't give out nuts I look around the table there are enough nuts edda begin with I have a great big bowl my mother-in-law very kindly a few years ago bought us a a big silver bowl and their full full of individually wrapped chocolates little chocolates anybody asks a question anybody sings nicely anybody answers something anybody says something which is interesting or fun or nice it's to do with pace up I get a chocolate everybody I'll tell you something huh it works it works like a dream I'm telling you from the smallest to the biggest my mother-in-law's always buy us every pesach right as she's adds involved with everybody else and everyone's got a little bag that they can put their chocolates into and it becomes like a little competition who's going to get them all and it work it works like a dream really I'm telling you it sometimes it's the most incredible thing so now we know what there's something here why the sun's here to teach us to teach us Laila sada you know you know that according to the Jewish year nissan is the first month of the year so pesach is the first young terms of the year and that's y el aceite is all about putting down we're putting down these foundations we're going to try and give this over the kids each one according to who they are each one according to his understanding so here well I will end with an idea RAV gantz read who you may be familiar with his name you wrote what's called the kids to show canara the concise code of Jewish law but he also wrote a book called their period which is his commentary on Hamish and he writes over there that the the pasuk says that the function of Leila said is lamont to supper but Osney binnacle or bane beneful in order to tell over the story LaMarcus after but also a beautiful baby beautiful excuse me to your child and to your grandchild so says are stronger gun Street a very interesting question he says wait wait what did the grandson do that he's got to listen to this for he's got listened to it twice he's got to hear it from his grandfather and hear it from his father as well what did he do so he says like this he says that the the Torah is coming to teach us Lamont a sapper burrows made dinner thought that if you tell this over to your child in the way that your child can understand it properly and he then tells it over there his child you've now given him the tools that he can give it over to his child properly it's as if you've told your grandchild directly it's a very it's a very very beautiful idea and it really encapsulates the concept of Laila Seder it really does like I said it was all about transferring from one generation to the next the ability to be able to transfer it on to the generation that comes out to that as well so I have a proof for rational against freed where he doesn't need my proofs he really doesn't but to me it's it's a he doesn't he doesn't mention this but to me it's something we exactly absolutely clear lamonta suffered the odds nate been home a min ho the verse really reads that you should tell it over into the ears of your children and your grandchildren and the word is seems to be somewhat superfluous because where else do you tell things over right I mean what are you going to talk up his nose so right is after hearing wine after the Torah sailorman to supper baraz nay binho or B&B makan I think the answer is because the possible verse is coming to teach us that every son has his own ear every Sun understand things in his own way and as his own approach and is it owned his own ability to be able to understand things it's over here because I think I think because I think over here when you say but ozni it's turning it into its teaching you a little inside and get go inside it should be internalized but to recognize that every kid has it on here the shmoo is going to be too it's too generic everyone's going to hear it right the word over here with the ears right social analyst says that can I Tanana elpida koi every child has to be educated according to his Derek according to his personality according to his ability and that's what Layla fader is all about the idea of relating to every single child according to who he is and allowing each child to talk on Layla sada to flourish right and to be able to have a connection to Ellis ada so I'll tell you something a little bit personal I haven't thought about this for a while actually but somebody somebody mentioned it to me the other day and it got me thinking when I was growing up my our Seder was always run by Mike father it was always in our home and my mother made enormous starring they were like you know 4050 sometimes even 60 people that were there for the first night and the second night it was like a gathering point for all kinds of all kinds of strays and and weights and who knows what and a lot lots and lots of family as well and my grandfather ran the Seder it was his night and he SAT over there and I can I can fix him very clearly at the at the head of the table he passed away whatever oh my he died he passed away 30 years ago and I remember the first time that we had a seder without my grandfather so my father took over and for me it was it was very strange it really was I never realized all those years it was just it was like that was just like the norm my grandfather was there and he ran the Seder that was just a norm that was that was the way that it was done but but the first year that my father took over it was it was very strange it really was and there was something palpable that was missing from the Seder and it took me a long time to understand but what was missing was that extra generation the idea of Leila Seder of giving over from one generation to the next generation and that was gone and that's Ella se de and the four sons and the father that's still there to be able to try to educate his children and to turn Judaism into something which is not there designer hid that it should be something joyous it should be something that we can that we can relate to and something that we can get the most incredible enjoyment from the Midrash em everybody should have a inspiring and uplifting pesach it should be a seder that you know in the chem ballistics forum it says that on say tonight all of the gates in the Shaam I mean that in the heavens are wide open we have the most extraordinary ability to be able to tap into the most incredible spiritual dimensions so it's a ship we should all be Zoe we should all merit to be able to tap into those dimensions and we should come out of seder from the way that we went in and it should be a really it should be a hug cashier the Sun AF maybe with the emphasis on the Sun air that we should all be able to feel the sim for the truth scimitar the you shall I'm happy new year [Music]