Our Family, Our Strength - Principle #21: Attitude to Schoolwork - Rabbi Yirmiyahu Abramov

we continue our series of the twenty five principles of Jewish child rearing we are now in principle number 21 this is all based on the book our family our strength principle number 21 attitude to school work now home work school work is generally perceived as some kind of a tedious burden children hope that their schools won't overburden them and already the rabbi's of the Talmud describe a natural phenomenon ketene acabo react me betta safer little children their intent in discovering the world in playing in adventuring in exploring so when they feel overburdened by school work as the rabbi say they flee from it like a little child runnin away from school children their natural tendencies to run away from school so on the other hand it's imperative and important that the child succeeds at school because if he doesn't succeed he's going to develop a negative self-image he's going to position himself as a loser and that's not a healthy formula that's not a healthy thing to happen because the child will then can then look for alternatives so we as parents have a very delicate task over here on the one hand we need to see that the child in fact does all his schoolwork he completes his schoolwork on the other hand he shouldn't feel pressure from us he's getting enough pressure from his task mosca the school teacher and now he comes home and he drops into the haven the harmonious home the home his Haven and there he finds another task masker the parent who's chasing after him are you finishing her homework did you finish your homework let's see what you got to do etc cetera homework is something that is something necessary to have but on the other hand it should not be a burden so the parents can help the parents can help actually physically helping when we see the kid is encountering difficulty in any particular subject so let's sit down with them and give them a few minutes of attention be it in math or in language whatever it might be a child may not have an inclination to a certain field of work not everything is perfectly suited to his personality sometimes they are teachers not discerning who do overburden the children who do have unrealistic expectations of the children so we as parents have to be around there we have to be helping we have to be assisting we have to keep the atmosphere as positive as possible make sure the child has free time make sure the child has time for letting loose and just letting his hair down and relaxing on the other hand we must make sure also that he is in fact accomplishing at a reasonable level that he won't fall out of favor and become the student who is functioning purely because then he gets that label he begins to live up to that label and it's a downward descent so in conclusion let's make sure that our children do their homework work on their schoolwork help out when necessary but keep it fun fold given little prizes in the middle of a child is immersed in some difficult thing arrive at some little surprise I me that they're like something a little some some delectable item of food that they that's their favorite and say this is in the reward for you doing your homework so diligently I know you want to go out and play but let's just finish this let me see if I can pitch in and then you go out to play so we need to keep the delicate balance between pressure and relaxation which is absolutely crucial in the home and help the child achieve at his level in his school you