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Epic Jewish Dating Tips! Rabbi Eli Karmel

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Hidabroot - Torah & Judaism avatar
Hidabroot - Torah & Judaism

Transcript

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[Music] it is very normal to feel super nervous before going on a date for sure on a first date and even once you've gotten to know them a little it's still normal for you to feel nervous especially if you like the person you're dating and you want them to like you then you'll feel Under Pressure to make sure that you don't do anything to turn them off and unfortunately often the very fact that you are so nervous will make you unable to act like your true self which will just make you even more nervous that it's not going to go the way you want but luckily there is a mental exercise which you can do to be able to get rid of any feelings of nervousness so that you will always be able to have a clear and natural mind to be able to do your best you see the reason that you feel nervous is not because you are curious about what will end up happening the reason you feel nervous is is because you are worried that the outcome will be the one that you don't want you're scared of being rejected or you're scared of being in the uncomfortable position of having to reject them see if someone told you that they were deciding between giving you a red Ferrari or a white Ferrari you you would definitely be curious but you wouldn't feel stressed out because you know that both of the possible outcomes are good for you it's only when you are waiting to find out if they will buy you a Ferrari or if you have to buy them a Ferrari that's when it switches from Curiosity to nervousness so if you don't want to feel nervous in any situation then all you need to do is stop and remember that even if the outcome that you are worried about happens and you get rejected still that is really just as good for you as if you'd gotten the outcome that you wanted because you know that Hashem who loves you is the only one who decides every single thing that should happen to you and he is the one who can make them like you or not and he only does what is the absolute best for you and even if you cannot understand why getting rejected is good for you but you trust that if you could see things the way Hashem does then you would be overjoyed at getting whatever Hashem sends your way if you could live with this belief then you will turn all your nervousness into simp simple curiosity because you will now know that all of the possible outcomes are really just as good for you so really every single intelligent person should realize how lifechanging this mindset is but especially if you are dating then you should make sure to start working on your and put a strong system in place to remind you at least once a day that every single thing that happens to you is directly decided by Hashem who loves you who's doing it for your best because the more you can remind yourself then the more you'll be able to remain calm and relaxed even when it seems like your fate depends on another person [Music]