Transcript
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the yeshiva.net
today's class is dedicated by Stephen
and Robin Ross in memory
of their beloved grandparents Selma and
Abraham Berman
thank you very very much and may they be
an eternal source of light blessing and
inspiration to you and the whole family
and all of our people
many blessings and thank you
thank you very very much we truly
appreciate your partnership
so let's begin let's summarize and
continue
the last piece of the minority
gave an example of War
and in battle
[Music]
in order to engage the enemy
in order to
defeat the enemy
there's a strategy that's employed in
which
one
might do something that seems like a
form of surrender
which has allow themselves to uh
go into a place where they can be
ambushed
or hurt or beaten
but it's all part of a plan it's all
part of Escape
where that brings out
all of the forces all of the troops of
the enemy into the open and once it's in
the open
an open field an open space
they can ultimately come with their
ferocious might and eliminate the enemy
so even though somebody who doesn't
understand or looks at it superficially
says you're you're seating territory
you're you're giving up you're giving
you're allowing yourself to lose and be
defeated
you're allowing for casualties you're
allowing your sworn enemy to win you
that's only a very superficial
perspective because they don't see
full picture and really it's fully
Central to a strategy which is the only
way which you'll ultimately be able
[Music]
examples from chess
maybe a more benign War if this gives an
example of real war which is not fun
put it mildly but uh chess is more of an
intellectual War
so sometimes you move your Pawn
and you move your point to a particular
position you advance it and you know
that you just allowed it to be knocked
knocked off the game you just lost the
piece
and in chess every piece is precious
including a pawn which one they may even
become a queen if you get it to the if
you manage to get to the other side
so you literally willingly you you you
surrendered your Pawn what happens
if you're engaging the enemy you need
you want this bishop or his castle or
it's not right here it knocks off the
pawn and then you'll be able to knock
off that piece
or the real the real chess Champions
they may not knock that piece but they
they cause the other person to maneuver
and position himself
in a way that ultimately will bring to
your Victory and that poem became a
casualty but it's not really a casualty
because you're going to win the game
themselves
that even though it's not a precise
metaphor
because here the laws of war
everyone is really limited by their
capabilities with Hashem it's different
but the similar system works on a cosmic
level as well
and that is that in the battle battle
of Purity against impurity which as he
said is a very very fierce
and genuine and serious battle the
reason it's a battle is because all
unholiness and all evil
and all impurity and all Clipper only
lives off
due to Holiness its entire source of
oxygen and vitality and existence is
divine Holiness because without it
it has no theme it has no existence it
has no substance and therefore it will
fight
with every fiber of its being to get to
keep kadusha engaged to keep caducea
Holiness entangled and enmesh
an interlaced and interconnected with it
so that it can get its food
and therefore the most important thing
is to cut off the supply
cut over the supply to the enemy I'm
supplying the enemy
and I have to cut
but that cutting is not easy
because the Clipper will do anything not
to allow it we'll use any defense
mechanism and any excuse to keep me
engaged and entangled
and when you say any excuse it's talking
about any emotion any rationality any
experience any intuition just to make
sure
that the enemy does not lose its source
of water and oxygen and nutrients which
is only holiness
it'll do anything to grab more but even
more not to let go of what it has
because the moment it does
it has no claim and has no existence
and that's where the first period comes
in the first bit of the word
from the word means to separate
to separate to be able to create a
separation this is me and this is not me
this is my goodness and this is some
debug
I'm using the word did book obviously in
a more General sense
some did book that that
was inculcated into me that I'm now
dealing with
the trick is the Clipper needs to make
you believe that it's not clip it's you
it's really you that's who you are
that's who I am
as long as this anxiety and this
depression and this this
self-consciousness and this egotism and
this Despair and the self-doubts
and the feelings of of negativity and
toxicity of me then the clip was good
I'm not getting rid of myself
and that's its Victory its Victory is a
perpetrator whether a physical or
emotional or both
internal or external
imbues impurity into me and I eternalize
it as mine
Clippers is good that's good that's all
we need
as long as you took the virus and you
made it yours and now you're replicate
it and your system will believe that
this is who you are wonderful how I'm in
the
to cut off that Supply takes a lot a lot
of courage and it's a lore it's a it's a
bad
in this battle he said there's a side
Commerce there's a secret
and that is that sometimes
you allow the enemy
to cause casualties simply to bring it
into a space where you can actually
destroy it
so on one level
you're giving up
one so the speakers being knocked off
the game
there seems like to be a victory but the
only purpose of this Victory is what
the ultimate deceit of the clip
that was the main point that we learned
this is part of the United States
when I'm allowing the enemy to defeat me
she says
that that's a real unit
it's extremely painful
but the whole real purpose of it was
part of the strategy
and he says therefore the
commander-in-chief the one who's running
the war he never disappeared for a
moment
he knew exactly
that the poem is not
it's not that that he's not losing
it's just a preparation to win it's a
preparation for victory
and he says just like in the physical
metaphor
he's never going to send in the ultimate
generals and commanders and troops that
are going to win the battle
because he doesn't want them to be
casualties
you have to also know who's going for
who's going over there
to be able to take the the to take the
bullet
upon right you put the you're not going
to put you're not going to put the queen
to be knocked off okay
if you put the king there the game is up
so spiritually speaking what that means
it says even when there's a casualty
it's only in the future because he said
it's in the skin it's in proportion it's
in the garments it's never in the in the
bones in the flesh and the core
even if it's only is this external
element that are being sacrificed it's
also only to win
also not a real defeat
but even that is only the external layer
it's not the internal core the internal
core always remains aloof Sublime sacred
whole
it's sending in so to speak its own
troops it's sending in its own garments
into a very uh violent or bloody or
difficult place
and it's going to get hurt
but what's going to get hurt never the
core because the core remains
essentially essentially Transcendent
essentially sacred essentially
Victorious
Joseph
was lowered into Egypt
who wrote he was taken down
and hurath is a passive term it's not
yora he didn't go there
he was slept down he was a victim he was
a passive victim means you were taken
down like you take down the table
like you take it down the boat like you
take it down an inanimate manner
you're transporting a car you're
transporting a horse
well the horse is not inanimate but it's
you decide what you want to do
if you manage to control them the ocean
he didn't decide his brothers decided to
sell them into slavery and the people
decided to buy it so it says
that the word hurray really comes from
the word in Hebrew whoever comes to the
word do not dead which means a ruler
foreign
but really he wasn't going down
he was going up
only by becoming a slave and becoming a
prisoner
did he interpret the dreams of pharah
and he became the prime minister of
Egypt second in command
so was he going down or going up
he was becoming the ruler of Islam
but yet it's a nice shot but at that
point Joseph was going down he wasn't
going up
means take him down
making words
there's a third finish in the mattress a
third common thing the Joseph
there's no vows there's no goodness
so you could pronounce words different
ways and it's precisely that way there's
no decudence because many words you're
supposed to pronounce different ways
even though it creates a title we
pronounce it one way but the fact that
it lends itself to different
pronunciations is all part of China
that's the concept of creative so the
matter says you can also read the Joseph
says
he took down god with them
for yoseph
means he was taken down another Passat
is he went to rule and the third is how
he really brought the skin of that
is
1981 so he said that all three something
mother said
it's not three years it's all the same
it's different different dimensions the
message doesn't just mean he was taken
down and one day something good came out
of that
why don't you say something else the
hurat was already a a form of rulership
there's two ways of looking at going
down one way of looking at going down is
I'm a victim
I'm a slave hopefully one day I'll see
the good but here we're learning
something much deeper
the going down itself was a form of
Conquest
Joseph wasn't going down as a slave he
was going down as a ruler even though it
looked like he was going down as a slave
because what was he really doing
what was going into that space
as a Divine ambassador
and that's the whole variety there's two
ways of looking at people's Journeys
and I know this is much easier said than
done but
at the moment we're talking so I'm
talking about it but I'm saying this
disclaimer that nobody should think that
the words capture the depth of the
intensity of the experience
it goes through a painful Journey
especially in their younger years when
they don't even have the discernment to
know what's their fault what's not their
fault right that's the whole challenge
when I'm an adult I could separate this
is Clipper this is not Clipper I'm
guilty I'm not guilty this is you this
is me when I'm four years old when I'm
six years old when I'm eight years old
it's all me oh
and if something comes from a respected
figure and never mind somebody who's so
close to you it can't be their bad right
so who's really it who's really at fault
so of course it's only I deserved it I
brought it on me they're they're sense
this is one of the worst things I play
with people's minds this depth of of
self-blame
of self-loathing
I'm the crazy person either I deserved
it or I'm crazy and the Very fact that I
suspect something else just means I'm so
evil and dark you understand that this
is all impurity that attached itself to
me and literally hijacks my thoughts it
hijacks my brain
and that's exactly the war that's
necessary to separate
so as long as I see it only as I never
fell into the wrong place wrong time
wrong family wrong Community wrong
School works and okay that's what I'm
saying the news you know when a tree
falls in a car they were just in the
wrong time in the wrong place
you know cookies crumble different ways
so now the whole avoida becomes how
could you recover from such an
experience and hopefully you could
recover
but there's something much deeper
institutions
what if I can go back to that experience
and actually imagine for a moment that
Hashem was the one who went through the
experience
I was like an ambassador
so to speak God's imagine God Infinity
all of his Infinity he chose to go into
this experience
so it's not that I
was so broken and the question is can I
heal from that Brokenness the I that is
at the core Divine was never broken it
went into a place of Brokenness simply
because it knew that with this soul that
has the power to defeat the Brokenness
because I went in and this I went in as
a king I didn't know one as the victim
it was infinite Consciousness choosing
to go through the most finite and maybe
darkest of experiences
through this song which is
knowing that this soul
will have the ability to be able to take
the slap to take that torn
to allow to be able to take the the
bites so to speak or the bark
of that torn being thrown off the board
and yet using that as a catalyst to
ultimately eliminate so much Purity
impurity from its system and from the
world around it
who was a classic example for this
Joseph when his brothers were terrified
when they saw him and he revealed
himself to them and he asked him what
did he say
s we don't get the price why they
shouldn't get depressed they don't have
a risk to get the dress he should be the
one not to get the class they were fine
they were 22 years with their father
their family went on as normal
imagine you're in prison for 22 years
well at this point he wasn't a prison he
was prime minister of region but he went
through a lot
and even as prime minister of Egypt he
was torn away from his family
and then the one who threw you into
prison
suddenly realizes who you are who he is
what our relationship is and gets
terrified and the victim was a prison
for so many years saying oh don't be
upset
it said something is
you hurt me you destroyed my life
and when I confront you and I say I'm
Joseph you know I'm the guy who sold
them to Egypt I'm the slave I say but
but don't worry don't worry relax it's
fine you should say okay I'm so sorry
what can I
suddenly they were in a much different
position than he was
and he said because you didn't sell me
the family
Hashem sent me
well Joseph didn't know that they said
Santa
they threw him into a pit they saw them
at the slavery Joseph was that naive he
told power he told the bottle that he
was sold he was stolen he was kidnapped
him Yosef was very very practical person
who exactly how he ended up in Egypt
he wasn't arguing about the facts
he was not arguing about the
circumstances the eyes of hura
but how do you explain who wrote what is
hurat I know it's urad I know the soul
went into battle and all this Blood I
know the soul was hurt his casualties
but how do you see it
I could see it from the perspective
of I just had bad muzzle bad luck ended
up in the wrong family in the wrong
place or I could see it hide it
there's a mission of leadership here
and the leader goes to places where
other people don't know Joseph nobody
else can go there Joseph so yes if so
was chosen on her slickness
and you don't send them you don't send
the most trained troops to go sit in a
park and eat so much good sunflower
seeds
the people who have to take out last
week the Islamic Jihad
terrorists right
in charge of that operation you need the
most skilled trained experts
the Precision the meticulousness because
it's such a crazy mission
so imagine when you send the soldier and
to Normandy will you send this no
Soldier to blow up Hitler's uh bunker in
Berlin will you send this Soldier to
take out Osama bin Laden
or to take out these Islamic Jihad
terrorism
the soldier says what am I a loser
you're not a loser you're the man you're
the man
but we don't see it when it comes to our
own pain
because the clip over there takes over
so of course you're a loser the Joseph
hurat he never made the mistake of
thinking he was lowered into Egypt he
was just a passive nebuch case he was
chosen to be a leader it was a painful
Journey this doesn't mean it's not
painful
this doesn't mean you're not going into
dangerous places and it doesn't mean
that some soldiers don't come back
they rescued the the hostages from
untappi and Yogi Netanyahu
and another three died
so till their last breath they didn't
see themselves as The Losers of the
Jewish people who were thrown out of
class you know go to Uganda what are you
going to do here
Uganda
you got my point you're used to have
always understood this
that he was sent on a mission how did he
understand it that's the third
interpretation of marriage because how
did this
because he never thought he was separate
from the skin
there's delivers thanks to all the three
interpretations that the Madden shall
won but Joseph
is lower but really
it was going to be
or how how can they both work together
so this is a schlichus it's a mission
it's not a decree it's not a death
sentence
it's a mission that is a difficult one
that's no question
and it's a mission where they are
there's pain and the external part of
the Soul like those troops who go first
like those pawns they get hit and they
get hit hard
Joseph was hit
Joseph was hurt he wept and nobody weeps
as many times as Joseph
cries nobody you don't have any time
somebody cranks so many times
if he became a Heart of Stone and he
became just this cold strong man he
wouldn't cry so much obviously the fact
that he was weeping so much means his
heart remained open
because that's the key the key is not to
disassociate
you see what often happens when we go
through negative experiences we do one
of two things
either we become
so tough and ruthless to survive
cynical tough ruthless you don't believe
anybody or anything and there's a good
reason for that wow there's a good
reason but you can see something on
people's faces it's just like a certain
sense of it's not going to happen again
all right
another form which is very similar but
it's just expressed differently is
disassociation
a person like becomes a little detached
from the world like you're not here if
you're not really here and you can't
really get to me
so either I'm so here and I'm so tough
and I'm so strong like I'm not going to
be moved by anything oh I just like live
in a you know like in a sugar-coated
cotton candy La La Land Six Flags and
I'm on top of a ferris wheel singer once
in a while I'll peek out but I'm always
smiling but it's really a form of
disassociation
uh
foreign
sourdough you put into a meal because
yeah
a little sweet what's wrong a little
sugar in the tea they're not sugar
Splendor not Splendor little honey
those of your wife Max awake healthy
cakes what makes a healthy cake or
healthy muffins instead of sugar at
least coconut sugar not regular sugar
so you said that represents zoyote
sourdough he said it's a person who's
very sour
and Vash is very sweet
too sour or too sweet it's already here
nothing wrong with being a sweet person
it's good to be a street person but it
needs a sweetness that's
it's almost like I'm I never take this
I'm always sweeter nothing ever to like
it are you here are you present
when you're present
I never become too sour or too sweet
it's two reactions
what is the reaction where I become very
sad and what is the reaction where
you're not going through a different
world and I'm very sweet I can't blame a
person
how could Yosef remain presence
how could he remain present
only because of how what he saw how he
saw himself
this was the main point yeah
and as we get older we could we could
reframe all those events and all those
experiences and all those Journeys as
part of us including the very fact that
I didn't know about it when it was
happening I didn't know how to interpret
it this way in other words I thought I
was really sent into battle because
I was rejected
I wasn't chosen I was rejected that's
also part of the mission that's what you
have to everybody has to understand
people sit here and we talk about this
and they say yeah but when I when this
and when x y z Etc I didn't know all of
this I messed up the fact that I didn't
know about this is also part of the
mission though you understand
that's also what I was chosen
labor name is Donald Everson yeah
like undercover You're So Undercover
that you don't even know you're on a
mission
usually undercover is nobody else knows
but the real undercover missions is you
also don't know
you know why because if you would know
you would never be on this mission
if you would really know what's
happening you're going into such Dark
Places your conscious self would never
be able to know this so your soul your
super conscious soul
listen to what I'm telling you the
deepest part of your soul which is not
afraid of anything
because it's part of Hashem doesn't have
to be afraid
says I'll go there but if your conscious
brain would know that you're like no no
we're not going there
but it's really all part of that mission
of course I didn't know I couldn't know
if I would no I wouldn't be there the
only reason I could be this because I
didn't know but that allowed me to go to
places that no other Soul can go
and now
like Joseph you can transform the whole
tumor you can eliminate what you have to
eliminate you can transform what you
have to transform
for another moment were you a real
victim even that which was affected is
only the external part of the Nissan
which means the way you think about
yourself vis-a-vis yourself the core
self remains absolutely
foreign
[Music]
I don't think he understood
he didn't see how it's working out
but for a moment he did not feel
that he's just an abandoned rejected
victim and started to blame himself what
an evil kid he is he didn't go there
and that's how he retained his Purity
his Integrity his his his pain his grace
there's nobody in Tamar that you fall in
love with so much like Yosef in terms of
his grace and his charm right we read
the commission like wow this is a guy I
would like to hang out with
really he should have been the most
bitter cynical angry vengeful man
especially after he got power
well how do you know how the Roman
emperors or other dictators when they
would come to power how they would take
revenge from everyone who hurt them
throughout their life I'm not going to
describe to you what the Roman emperors
used to do in order to enjoy Revenge
from their enemies
you know throw them off build them and
it was horrible what they would do
all their vicious all their cruelty came
out
and with the ice if you see he was
strong
that he was a tough person and he was he
was a very strong person obviously but
you never see his toughness turning into
a a a harsh
dictator a negative person
there's always empathy and compassion
how does that happen
unless you disassociate unless you you
push it and well that's what this is
what's disassociation this Association
is a kid goes through so much pain the
soul leaves the body
some of you know this very well
unfortunately and then the body says you
have to do whatever you want to me
because I'm not here if the art leaves
the body so that body is just like a
traditional Mass so do whatever you want
but they never come back they can't come
back
because if you're going to come back and
feel the pain you won't be able to
survive so when I was four or six or
eight or two
my brain decided to do what's best in
order to survive what's Best in order to
survive disconnect disconnect
you stop feeling your emotions in your
body you're not you're not integrated
you can't be integrated
it would have been too painful
understand what that means this is a
very very this is a very very serious
stuff in people's lives now they're
older they may have children they can't
connect to their children
they want to they're not bad people they
do the right thing but in most emotions
have to be blocked the emotions have to
be cut off
you know if there's a leak if this I
remember once Friday night where our
ceiling came down and all the water was
was gushing right so we went to shut the
water
in the basement in the boiler there was
no water in the house anymore
and it was necessary because if you
would leave on the water don't worry it
wasn't that didn't know where it was
somebody else did it
you know they're getting impressed
why because if you leave the Water
Source on the whole house is going to be
flooded so what do you do you say you
know what I don't want to drown I want
my kids to be safe so you shut the water
now there's no water so you can't go to
the bathroom you can't open the sink but
at least at least there's a house that's
not flooded so that's what happens
if there's a water leak in my life and
suddenly I'm going to be overwhelmed
from pain I shot I shut down boom
no water coming out but at least
I could survive
but I know it's a world of emotions a
copy other people
I look at people say oh I love you oh
that's when you say I love you so that's
when I start saying it
so I become artificial intelligence
that's what I become not as smart as
artificial intelligence but I try
and if you have a good Jewish head you
do pretty well it's artificial
intelligence
so many of us walk around
to put a big sign I am artificial
intelligence
intelligent productive nice normal fine
maybe even sweet but it's all artificial
intelligence and there's a reason for it
I shut down the water very very young
age
and they cannot blame somebody for this
anyone who judges is completely clueless
because they don't understand
what people go through they just don't
understand if you don't understand it
you have to have the humility to say
interesting but I don't know what he's
talking about which is fine
that's a one wonderful thing to say I
don't know what this guy is talking
about
how do I stop that kadusha
um from
the first thing is awareness
you think so how do you cut off the
tuition right that's the biggest
challenge
you see and that was that's what we
could learn from Joseph but never for a
moment when you go into self-blame
I'm the most evil creature who ever
existed he did not go there
because it wasn't true
yeah
what can you find once there's a lot of
blackheads in All City no one said it is
so obviously there are some people that
don't even remember having a teacher and
a girlfriend and show them like what
would you tell them
I don't know I
that's above my pay grade with Joseph
want to tell Souls that are reincarnated
yeah coming by and you know
take it like a man
yeah
take it like a cat let's get milk
please
and give it some milk
listen every shot has his journey the
result rights
even those nashamas it says in Sanhedrin
the 11th chapter that the certain people
in England
my result says
may not come down on the same goof
ultimately comes to a ticket and it has
to be that way this is what he says the
shallow writes this now he's all right
this many of them are Kabbalah
there's a contradiction
over there it's not really a
contradiction not passion it is at the
surface it looks like there's a
contradiction between
you go deeper into all the sources
you see that there's so many different
things that the Ghazal say it's very
very
I want to call it loopholes it's just
yeah it's all very penny is Nick it's
very deep
for example the Demarcus the mission
sentence fought in the first mission
event
yeah
[Music]
those numbers
I'm just giving you an example
and then it says other people
and so forth and then nigamari says
later
you show us people who read notes
they were expounding on rishimus the
Republic
I think I saw darshan those who know how
to darshan the
Russians they know how to Dash and they
see the racism of the hashama it was
never erased even the person went so low
there's a resume you can still see the
rest of you they don't they're
magalies
the certain people
will finish but not them so at the
surface what does it look like they're
so bad that the values of gehen won't be
enough for them
is saying yeah ultimately he's going to
finish and they're not going to be done
with
at the surface it means like all the
punishments in the world won't be enough
of that you understand all the fires of
the heaven still won't be enough what
does it say get Hannibal finish they
move on
each I call them they made them call
them my arrows will be done but they not
this is
why do we get into this suffocate right
but that's talking about even the
generations we had real real sharp
yet real real Charlotte
when you talk about it our times
the majority majority majority of cases
probably
and that's from a completely literature
perspective because
[Applause]
these kids
so you know this has finished but
there's also but I think it's in
addition to that
and he writes that all the things
because I'll say my reading didn't
believe you know because him inheritance
he says in our generation huh
but it's okay
it doesn't apply today because it's
mostly technical Synergy right
but in any case the point here is
that
you see
that so many
fall fall of so many people is by
circumstances
or situations
that are largely largely out of their
control
and the choice that we have the agency
that we have is later how to look at it
how to define it how to deal with it not
if it happened it didn't happen
just say there are sometimes we know
that the summer knows that it's white
there and it has and it's because you
have to make a difference
so the person that's suffered in life
and he knows this particularly
previously he knows it's for it's
ventilation still hurts it's so
difficult the iceberg's journey hurts
yosef's Journey was painful but he told
his brothers
you did not sell me I was sent
ready to say that that is I see the
second it started it was already
emotional it's the somehow minimized
fact that he was like
he didn't have any friends
very good question what's it mean he was
a ruler in the beginning it doesn't mean
it he looked like a ruler
but that's
that's what rulership doesn't mean
that I'm always a king rulership means
that even when Joseph was in a pit and
as a slave
he was a ruler what does it mean he was
a ruler
not not that's physically
it was a ruler
he knew but he understood very well that
he's going into a very difficult place
not as a victim
he's going into a very difficult base so
he could be fully present
but the meaning of his presence was not
that somebody else kidnapped me and
abducted me and I'm Gone the meaning of
his presence there is
that in order to bring in the truth into
those places I have to go into those
places
and therefore I have to be present and
to be present in those places means I
feel what's happening in those places if
I'm detached I never really went there
in order to go there
and bring in Holiness and to impurity I
have to go into the impurity so some
extent it says going in means you get
hurt by it you're feeling where you are
if not I'm not present
we can understand it practically in our
lives sometimes if I'm dealing with a
situation it's a painful situation
what does presence mean presence doesn't
mean I just say oh it's all good comes
with everything is good good good good
good then I'm just putting on a smile
that's a form of Detachment and
disassociation and often I won't be able
to deal with it I'll just ignore it
again and repress it again
you have to be careful you said it's all
good good good good good
not to say it's true
it's true but but sometimes it's done in
a way that delegitimizes the experience
of it and then I'm actually not
transforming what's happening I'm
detached to be fully present that means
I feel whatever whatever is going on
over there
and that's the whole idea of this battle
that he's talking about those soldiers
are sent into battle
and they're not eating cotton candy
they're not sitting in the Beloved
and that itself is part of the victory
because the fact that I'm there who's
there
it's Hashem so to speak when in there
he's not a noise
as I walk in the Valley of the shadow of
death I'm not afraid he doesn't say I'm
not walking in the Valley of the shadow
of death I'm walking there
and you know what it's not covered with
roses and Lilies until and tulips
there's other smells over there
but still I'm not dominated by fear
because of that I'm not dominated by
fear because even in that place where
I'm not a winner I'm a loser
I'm not there as a loser I'm there as a
messenger there's an ambassador my soul
went into there and there's only one
reason why Saul went there because it
has the courage to be able to go there
and it brings out all the toxicity
the porn gets lost
but the chess game I'm gonna win
the game of History I'm gonna win
and it's only because I went in there I
wouldn't have gone in there then I
wouldn't have any contact with the Enemy
I have contact and the enemy came out
from the rabbit holes and all the rats
and all the creeps and all the monsters
and all the demons came out like I said
last week the hyenas are all jumping on
my carcass
and if you look at me I look like a
carcass
and that's what that child sometimes
looks like that child looks like
literally a corpse that monsters are
manipulating and exploiting and until
man the clip are attached to it
little do they know
little do they know what power they
there
and of course they don't know they would
know they would stay away
they come out hyenas come out
But ultimately when this Soul knows
exactly who it is
the game is over
you're not gonna fool it
impurity won't deceive it
and he gives an example it says
that throughout history when yahoodah
went to Tom where it wasn't stuff you
say a malach pushed him what does it
mean
you would have went to Tumblr it wasn't
it wasn't a whole at the surface it was
a very Unholy Act
yet mashiach comes from it that mouth
was based of it comes from it and as he
said the most amazing family comes from
it and the most precious Sparks come
from it
someone used this model here huh
that's going to be another piece
so it's explained in the story another
spotted
this is the idea of so to speak you're
being defeated
by this interaction and you're going
into a place that's extremely
questionable in other words you're
lowering you're descending into an abyss
but you don't understood killing and
Tama even more than about the observices
this woman did changed all of history
actually says there's one act of Hudson
[Applause]
when you say malach push them what does
it mean we can understand sometimes I
pushed into situations
in many cases I didn't even choose it I
was literally it's an angel pushed me
and I got lost in the process and I fell
down and my Pawn was knocked on another
Pawn was knocked and another Pawn was
not and another Pawn was knocked
Soul was not destroyed
and the whole purpose is to be able to
ultimately transform it
and nobody will be able to transform it
like this song Nobody and that's why the
soul undertook this this courageous
mission
[Applause]
to accept the suffering because
later on but let's say he hadn't had a
dreams one minute he's sitting and
learning because
it wasn't smelling but he's not
Caribbean is he supposed to at that
point
um
it works together you ask it was Joseph
was he a happy person
what does happiness mean what is
happiness mean does happiness mean
that everything is just super super
perfect
I don't know if that's what happened
this week
okay so I think happiness real happiness
there's moments that you say this life
is perfect
but I think this this moment what
happiness means not necessarily that
everything feels so good
but that I know
that I'm doing the right thing
I'm in the right place
and I'm doing the right thing and I'm
choosing and I'm making the right
choices and I'm fulfilling the mission
and I'm supposed to be fulfilling now
without fear and without reservation
you'll be surprised
what a good feeling that is
and you're supposed to serve a champ 24
hours a day seven days a week
but let's face it you're not gonna have
24 7 perfect life experience
what if I'm in a difficult situation
what if I'm working through something
very hard what's the simple at that
moment that moment is not the sinkhav
I'm just feeling Dandy and Rosy and
everything is perfect I love you you
have such moments it should be great we
should be great it wasn't wrong but the
simplest The Sims have a conviction that
I know
that I'm making the right choice right
now instead of running away I'm present
I'm showing up and I'm showing up not as
a victim I'm showing up as a proactive
agent
man that's a very very powerful
feeling and it creates a certain
satisfaction not satisfaction to sense
like everything is smug and I'm
complacent but a satisfaction of the
sense that you're
you don't have to be ashamed of yourself
it's meaningful meaning meaningful
altitude
the prices where you can't move yeah
that's the opposite of depression so the
opportunity you're actually not just
feeling that when you're actually doing
something about it and and let's
understand this and what if I'm feeling
an experience of depression I'm so down
this is such a difficult thing that
itself could be but I know that sounds
strange that itself could be just some
kind of realizing that yes this is an
emotion I need to go through now
and you know what
it's not fun it's not fun
but it's meaningful that's important
I'm present to it I'm letting myself
feel it
we are because of many many years
okay we are afraid of emotions
at least I can talk for myself really
another few people as well
we are afraid of emotion at least
certain emotions and there's a reason
for it feeling these emotions
is not it's just not to put it
tomorrow today
anger works better for us because it's
about somebody else
what's anger you're this you're that
you're that you're that you're that so
almost I feel when you're angry at
somebody it's a it's a trick to feel
good it's fake
because the anger is usually a cover-up
anger is usually a secondary emotion
that's why
because
it is you attribute God to this this is
not God anger yeah it's really a
cover-up and anything that's a cover-up
is a form of a desire yeah stuff
yourself usually anger underlies
loneliness pain
Etc
so but anger becomes self-righteous
you're in Russia you're sick you're the
sickest person who ever lived I don't
know why I met you up now I feel good
I'm excited
that's not really what's happening I'm
sorry because I want to be close to you
and you cause me a lot of pain but
instead of saying that I want to be
close to you I just say I'm angry at you
and I don't need you I don't need you
really so why are you so angry if you
don't need it I need you very much but
I'm not ready to go there because that's
vulnerable
so anger is actually much easier for
many of us but some emotions are very
very difficult so what does simcha look
like simcha doesn't look like oh my
emotions are perfect it's it's it's it's
it's just it's foolish to tell a person
that if you're an over Hashem there's
certain emotions you don't have
that's not true
a soul has all types of second violin
emotions are like a violin you have many
different chords and they create every
different type you know how many keys
are there in a piano
huh
82 84 86 right
each key is essential each key is in the
soul has so many different Keys that's
what emotions are
but it's all part of the song it's part
of music you don't have to cut out keys
I don't like what the song with the song
says so it says I sing to Hashem with my
life not throughout my life with my life
life is a song
have exhilarating moments and songs also
have downers
great Symphonies have moments of
exaltedness and ecstasy and great
Symphonies also have moments of
somberness it's all part of the song of
life I don't have to be afraid of my
trees of my notes every note needs to be
played if I cut out a note I'm calling
out a piece of my soul
so you never have to be afraid of the
whole gamut of emotions we're so afraid
of it
because we're told this emotion is bad
bad bad bad but the truth is even though
concludes that as I experience all these
emotions there should ultimately be a
core soul that can observe it and say
wow
this is the journey
of my soul something I need to walk
through and dance through and and swim
through and crawl through
it's a song
but as I'm feeling it it doesn't feel
like a song it just feels horrible so I
want to escape it so I go eat or I go
drink or I go to the Kiddush or I go to
my phone phone is always good
you watch a clip
so at least if you watch my clip I might
be saying feel your emotions so I'll
bring you back but if you're watching
somebody else's clip
he may also be sad
I don't know I don't know whose Clips
you watch
so what what did I do I numbed it why
did I numb it I numbed it because it was
too difficult to deal with
could you find meaning there's meaning
in this experience there's meaning I
don't may not know what but there's
meaning because this is what I'm feeling
if this is what I'm feeling this is a
part of me just say it does not it's not
a part of me it's not going to help a
person
this is I think very important
this why is it quite so much that's why
I subscribe life is perfect I haven't
Warner so why am I crying
you know what being in a pit of being
separated from your father you lost for
22 years it's not fun
of course he cried and limit the
suppression yeah he never had
suppression he never felt he had to
suppress his emotions
I'll just find both together with
knowing that is
how does crying go together with knowing
that I'm on schlichus I think not only
it goes together it's an expression
expression of it because shlicious means
that I actually show up
doesn't mean I sit on the Ivory Tower
with a joystick and showing up in
certain places means I cry that's what
showing up means we're we're looking at
showing up as geographically you know
you're traveling to Afghanistan you're
traveling to Iran you're traveling to
Muncie
she said I have the problem okay
but but talk about traveling also means
emotionally what if I travel through my
emotions
you're going to have casualties there
what does that look like emotionally
that means going into an emotion
that means going into emotion that means
I'm going into a painter I'm going in
I'm not standing at the outskirts I'm
not looking with binoculars I'm not
watching it on a video screen
I'm going in
isn't that what tears are
tears means I'm there it affected me I
am here
I'm in that emotion and you know what
I'm hurt in that emotion
but that's the only way
I can actually spit out whatever I have
to spit out I can Purge whatever after
Purge I can vomit you'll forgive me
whatever I have to vomit
I could steer the tumor in the eyes and
say wow you have really been holding on
to me
get out don't come back and it won't
come back try a few times
being that those tears means presence
I'm here finally I'm here
that's why the greatest of souls who
have the most courage for them tears the
most natural
huh
but then it finds let's say sugar to be
sad
it's experiencing the full gamut of
life's courts and life's courts have
different different notes
the great guitar is a great violinist
it's not like oh I only play these
chords
the great PMS sorry I only do I only do
uh you know C minors
or Majors I only go do the majors I
don't believe in the markets
huh doesn't talk together with ego
declined
like everything it could go it could
feed the egoic mind it could feed the
ego but not necessarily
if the cry becomes an objective in and
of itself
meaning all I want to do is
just cry and feel bad for myself
and remain stuck there
unfortunately could be my ego has taken
over
and I could remain stuck in self-pity
but you know what that feeling there's
also something I have to work through
there's a reason people need self-pity
why do people just want to feel like I'm
a crybaby yeah I'm a crybaby and I feel
good about it there's a reason for that
too
that's also part of showing up
we don't have to be afraid anywhere our
emotions are taking us
teaching us here our soul is going on a
journey into a place
where healing is needed and you you
could be there and even though yeah but
I'm feeling well yeah that's exactly
what it's like I'm feeling it
manipulations huh besides if it's
exactly
if I'm trying to manipulate you yeah
then obviously
and I could still look at the fact why
am I trying to manipulate you
why am I trying to manipulate you and
why am I trying to exploit you I'm
gaining something from this
I probably don't have a core people who
live in the world of manipulation it's
because they have no car
if I can't exploit you what am I left
with
my relationships are all manipulative
that itself I have to be able to work
through there's nothing you have to be
afraid of as long
as you're genuine as long as you're
authentic as long as you're looking for
for truth
and only you know that
I can't know that I mean you could
usually see it after a few minutes of
talking to people you know where they
are if they're
ah
yeah if you're in tune you could yeah
foreign
now sometimes the person is so so
deceptive that they don't know they're
deceptive
and that's that's part of the empathy we
have to have if I'm so if I'm so wound
up that I don't know how wound up I am
if I'm so defensive and I don't know how
defensive I am if I'm so angry and I
don't know how angry I am right but when
somebody puts like that little you know
somebody gives you and the person just
explodes
you can say wow you know what happened
to you that you had to become so
ignorant
what happened to you that you have to be
in such denial how much disassociation
do you have you don't even know how
angry you are
you know when somebody says me angry I'm
not angry you're angry I'm very calm
I'm very calm and then they start
shivering and trembling and moving their
feet I'm very con person you know I'm a
very calm person
could see how calm I am now
so the question is what what happened to
you
that you have to be so disconnected it's
painful
but there's always one condition and
that's the key Joseph
he was an agent of the shrinah it was a
so the core was not contaminated because
Tuma can't win God
Clipper can cover up it can't win
you can't win truth that's the
fundamental question can evil really win
over the good could it
so if the holy side of Yiddish God is
means that ultimately Thomas can't win
why because it doesn't it doesn't have
real substance how can something that's
fake win over truth when it doesn't even
exist
so can't win
the moment Joseph had that in a very
deep place now when he went down he was
really going up
because going down didn't mean he's
becoming lost in the abyss it means he's
going to be the one who's gonna defeat
the impurity in the abyss but in order
to defeat the impurity in the abyss I
have to be able to descend there
and it looks like I will be defeated by
it I will suffer casualties I will get
lost
but it's only my skin that will have a
lot of wounds and the skin does carry
the scars
the fighter who goes into these places
on the Flesh on the skin
he carries
the scars and the wounds of a very
fierce battle
and that's what gives them credibility
that's what gives her credibility
that's what allowed him to defeat that
enemy he comes back and he says here
I was there I was there
we have a lot of questions listen
questions we have
of course there's questions and you know
what questions are part of it
questions are also part of it just like
crying is part of it questions are part
of it
moshirabeno had a lot of them yet
questions
it didn't make them less it made them
real
questions are part of it if I don't have
questions what does it mean what am I
doing with my brain
now are there Souls who are so lofty and
they really experience life from a
particular wholesome place where they
don't even feel pain because they're so
in touch with with with with with with
the goodness of it you have such Souls
but to copy them
in an inauthentic way it's it's
not my journey it's not my journey we
were made to feel we weren't made to be
artificial intelligence
they say that the Bells
who was a very holy man
I heard from
he was a chairman of a good sister all
the chairman of it was that of claims
conference it was a very special Jew it
came from the damask
was in Berlin I'm sorry in Vienna
so he would give Shalom to everybody
with gloves or with a Shema he
is ha he was careful what he touched for
good reason he was a very holy person
so he wouldn't give Shalom to uh
without uh he wore a glove or he had a
towel that's how he did it
now somebody else starts doing that
to copy him
you understand the difference
I'm gonna start wearing a towel touch
the towel
yeah I'll take you to a doctor
so uh
was in Vienna so he went to visit he
went with somebody to see him
so uh belzare was was almost blind he
later he became he couldn't see
the baron the bar and Bowser so it said
he was uh he was from the Gera family so
hatsukobasa knew him I think he said he
heard the story from
so uh the laborator was a son-in-law
then of the rabbit ayats he was learning
in Berlin I think so anyway so the bill
came to Vienna so he was there
so he he touched them and he took off
the towel and he gave him his hand
and he said
with warm hands
so uh said about him he was given
he was a Surah without a Heimer you know
it sure is
the body
so somebody once they say that the Gary
rabbit the base Israel came and he
expressed sympathy on what he went
through
he lost his wife he lost all of his
children he lost everything
he remarried but he never had a child
his brother
had a child
and died a year later and that's the
president Belzer ever
today was a nephew of nibhara The
Baron's children were killed and then he
remarried he passed away in 1957 of
Zion the country
so they say that the base is all
expressed sympathy for everything he
went through
you know all the pain so they say he
said
I never had a bad day in my life
and I've had a bad day in my life
that's what they say he said
what's shot
Yeah by him it was true because he was a
suitable he was at Surah
yeah that's my point that's my point
right
the maggot somebody came to the music
and said howdy could you thank Hashem
for bad things like good things he says
go to the position
so he went to the position he stayed
there for a few days he says what it
brings you here so the market sent me to
come to you to learn how to thank Hashem
for bad things
so he says you probably misheard the
name
he said no he sent me to you he said you
probably heard he probably sent you to
somebody else why not to you I never had
a bad day in my life
you got the wrong guy
you know you want to know how to deal
with poverty go to a poor person I'm a
rich man
and that's the market wanted him to
appreciate that there's such a person in
the world
in other words understand if a person is
completely nashama and the definition of
life is a relationship with Hashem so
how does he have a bad day in his life
every moment he has a relationship with
Asha how the relationship expresses
itself okay whatever
one day like this one day like that
even then they could be tears the
Belgium also cried but it's a different
type of pain it's the pain of the world
it's the pain of the shrin it's the pain
of the fact that we don't see so much
it's the pain of what many people go
through that's also pain you understand
a real oi of Israel has empathy for what
other people go through himself
I didn't know him so I I don't feel
equipped to really you know answer that
question
and probably even if I knew him I
wouldn't know him
but I could understand if somebody's at
Surah that they process things very
differently they process things very
differently
how do Souls process things when they're
not in the body
not the way we process things
some people come into a body but they're
not the body is just like a vehicle it's
like a lavortion it's like a suit
it's like a suit
I think I think when we say Hashem
should have ends the blood it means
something very special we said every
Shabbos
foreign
a folk expression I think it means
something very special
it means two things first of all it
means that the blood of every innocent
person that was spilled is accounted for
all the million and a half children that
were gassed
or the bullets in Ukraine the Holocaust
by bullets in Ukraine every child Every
Woman every man it's accounted for
it's not just
the Nazis come boom they never existed
somebody remembers their blood and it's
accounted for
the blood is accounted for
and who is it accounted for by
not just by uh by by Simon wiesenthal
Center
or Nazi Hunters which is also very
important but by the creator of the
world himself that means it's accounted
for eternally and absolutely
the creator of the world himself says
I'm gonna account for the blood of each
one that's that's that's that's a
statement it's a statement of how we
regard life how we regard goodness our
regard evil
I think the second element here is this
is already sensitive I mean there's a
very sensitive idea and I'm not sure
maybe it's not completely accurate
probably this real feeling can help
people move on
am I responsible to take revenge from
every Nazi in the world
if I could I should eliminate as many as
possible but what allows people to move
on and live productive lives almost
knowing that let God do certain things
they say that somebody once asked to be
on the synopsis one of the daily Israel
very interesting question he said that
the Christian Bible
is full of love
God is love love love love love love
always God is love love he says in the
Jewish Bible yeah
God is very angry
and he's killing and plagues and
punishing huh
yes there's moments after yes
no question they drastically there's
actually more than people imagine but
it's fine I'm not going to mention all
the sources but there's plenty of stuff
right I will cut you off in a Sati when
we just read it
you don't have that in the in the
Christian Bible huh
the flood yeah God yeah
so you said to be honestly our God is
the god of love and your God is the god
of violence Vengeance and War
so goodness
so he says to him that's exactly the
point
for you God is only love
but sometimes you need somebody to fight
a war so who fights the wars
you need somebody to hate you need
somebody to get rid of evil who does
that you
so you became bloodthirsty murderers for
us God is the God of Wars who has to
fight the war is God
who needs to hate God who needs to do
the vulgar so we could remain loving
and there's a truth to that Hashem it
doesn't mean we shouldn't eliminate
every Nazi who killed the Jew and
but it gives a certain manukas that the
Jewish people had
God will not forget any murder
huh
that was his point how many Jews were
killed from Christians how many
Christians were killed from Jews
so he said our God we believe that God
yeah he fights Wars he gets angry he
deals with criminals you know what
and we could be nice to each other we
don't have to kill everybody by you what
happened you're fighting for God so
everyone every Jew had to be murdered
every Jew didn't convert had to be we
were talking to the times of the
Christians were extremely violent
the Crusades Etc the inquisitions and
the the pogroms and we were accused of
everything by the Christians and how
many how many how much Jewish blood was
spilled in the name of Christianity
11 he says when people say that the
Christian God the Christian Messiah
brought to miss mashirk to the world he
says you know this is what mashiach
looks like with so much blood and so
much violence and so many of us killed
you know we were hoping for a different
type of gula
I'm not sure
I'm not so sure I mean you're right with
for many years we didn't have power
and obviously the Jews that when they
had power did some nasty things it's no
no need to be naive and and and we know
about how many Jews helped Stalin and
how many Jews were in the politburo and
how many Jews were part of the Communist
Revolution including our friend tarotsky
I'm not here turning into every Jew into
a saint my point is the Jewish culture
let's put it this way Jews are committed
to Judaism
have a very hard time killing people
let's face it
and we're not here to say that they're
perfect and Flawless people you know I'm
not the one who is accused of
saying that maybe I should say it more
we know but the fact is
that the fact is that the Jews who grew
up with Jewish culture Jewish values
it's very hard for them to kill people
well we have to walk with guns in Israel
we have to if we don't walk in Israel
with guns and we don't protect ourselves
somebody was telling me you know that
the the Israel and and the Palestinians
are equal they both do crimes
so I said you know I'll just give you
one I'll just give you one hypothesis
and you'll answer me just answer to me
honestly
if Syrian Army decides to Mark to go on
vacation to Hawaii for a year
and Egypt decides to go on vacation the
whole Army is off for a year and Jordan
decides to go on vacation free and
Iranian Army decides to go on vacation a
year and Afghanistan
and Lebanon everyone all the armies
around Israel are going to vacation for
two years
do you think Israel the next day is
going to invade Iran invade Syria
control their people what do you think
the truth is but now give me the
opposite hypothesis let's say the
Israeli Army decides to go to Hawaii not
for a year
but for two weeks
what do you think is going to be left of
Israel
just be honest with that answer
we think we all know the answer huh so
what do you what are you comparing
huh
yeah
and this is a fact nobody everybody
knows this
Iran would not be afraid that Israel is
invading Iran and Syria won't be afraid
even though we know what Syria and Iran
believe about Israel I want for Israel
if well it's not a week one day
Jews put down their arms
what happened at The Innkeeper War I
don't think they'll be given six hours
to breathe
the fact that this is this Relic not not
full but relative there could be some
days of Serenity in Israel it's not
because they're not trying
people don't realize
that if not for God's Miracles and the
protection that the Jews created for
themselves
there would be every single day every
single day dozens of Jews dead not one
Jew does it every day
nobody realizes that
and unfortunately once in a while
they're successful sadly
people have to realize this it's not
like oh once in a while they decide to
do a terror attack
every single day there's Terror attempts
and you saw during the time of the the
second and the father what was happening
until they built a wall until they went
back into Janine because Oslo and Gaza
these were colossal historic mistakes
that the Israeli government made
that turned out to be fatal fatal
strategic errors that they're suffering
from every day
how did we get into all of this you have
to remind me I'm a little ADD
ah
Indiana
this is the first beer this is
okay we'll take a break here tomorrow
morning Beijing will be a sheer also 7
want to try to finish
the mimer okay
have a beautiful day
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