He Shrunk Until He Disappeared… And Found God

So, as many of you know, my father passed away last year. My mother passed away this year. My father passed away last year. And my father used to have a 12-in black and white TV that he used to sometimes, if I was really good as a treat, would bring it to my bedroom and put it on the on a chair next to my bed. And I would watch 1950s sci-fi or horror movies >> [laughter] >> as a treat. Which tells you why I'm so disturbed. But at any rate, uh I was thinking recently about the 1957 classic, The Incredible Shrinking Man, which my father showed me. Basically, here's the short version of it. This guy, I think he was on a boat or something and there's some type of weird chemical mist. I don't know if it was chemical or radiation or whatever that just the McGuffin to get the thing started. Um at any rate, then a little while later he realizes that his clothes are too big on him. Uh what's going on? And then he's shrinking and shrinking. Eventually has to live in his daughter's dollhouse. >> [laughter] >> Then eventually, like, he falls down the stairs and the cat is chasing him and he then he becomes like so tiny that his wife can't even find him and she thinks he's gone and she leaves and then he's abandoned and um yeah. So, but I wanted to show you a trailer so you get the the gist of it. Here's like the synopsis of The Incredible Shrinking Man. This is Orson Welles speaking. I have 45 seconds to tell you about something I think you'll remember the longest day you live. About a man named Scott Carey. A few months ago he was 6 ft 2 in tall and weighed 190 lb. Today, he's 2 in tall and you can hold him in the palm of your hands. Now he lives in a world where he must fight for his life, a world where a friendly house cat is a predatory monster. Incredible because it's almost beyond imagining. Incredible because every hour he gets smaller and smaller. Incredible because every moment the terror mounts. Okay. And I guess they were right. They said, "A motion picture you will talk about for years to come." And what is it now? Is it It's almost 70 years later. Wow, and we're still talking about it. So, yeah, they were right. I like how they had the Orson Welles there. I guess they he was probably in the studio for like a day recording a bunch of different stuff and they got him to say yeah couple lines about the movie, but then he didn't say enough stuff, so then it had to have the regular announcer fill in the rest. Okay. At any rate, uh so I have fond memories of of this film. I haven't seen it in uh well, in '51, I was probably six or seven when I saw it, so I haven't seen it in 45 years. Probably not going to rewatch it. Just don't have time to watch uh old movies, but uh or new movies for that for that matter. But I'll tell you what I do remember. I remember the end where he's continuing to shrink. And he's shrinking and shrinking and he's shrinking and he's getting to the point of being microscopic. And then the whole question exists, I mean the whole question then arises like, if he does he exist? Like, what's the nature of his existence, I guess. Like, he's no longer able to function within human society, but he's still conscious. He's sentient. He he has an ex- he has an experience of of existence, but what is the nature of that existence as this microscopic uh being. And and ostensibly, he's going to only continue I mean, that's the implication of the of the storyline. He's going to only continue to shrink and like, to what extent will he shrink? Will he become like subatomic? Again, this is sci-fi. You don't have to spend too much time figuring out how it actually work practically. But that's the thought experiment. Like, what is the nature of his existence when it becomes that small? Okay, so I just want to show you the very end and tell you some thoughts I have about it. I looked up as if somehow I would grasp the heavens, the universe, worlds beyond number, God's silver tapestry spread across the night. And in that moment I knew the answer to the riddle of the infinite. I had thought in terms of man's own limited dimension. I had presumed upon nature that existence begins and ends is man's conception, not nature's. And I felt my body dwindling, melting, becoming nothing. My fears melted away and in their place came acceptance. All this vast majesty of creation, it had to mean something. And then I meant something, too. Yes, smaller than the smallest, I meant something, too. To God, there is no zero. I still exist. >> [music] >> Okay, that's incredibly profound. I mean, it's overtly theological. He speaks about God. To God, there is no zero. Smallest of the small, but I still exist. And he also he he says how his his worldview that he had he had imposed upon what he calls nature was that there is a beginning and end, meaning there is a finite scale. But that from the perspective of infinity, that's that's a false construct that no matter how small he becomes, from the perspective of the infinite, he still has significance. I mean, this is this is profoundly deep and I'm sure I didn't understand any of this when I was five or six and I saw the film. Um I'm not sure I fully understand it even now, but it certainly stirs something in me. And that's this idea that the true understanding of infinity, meaning God. In Kabbalistic parlance, we often refer to God as the Ein Sof, he who is without end. He has no beginning and no end. That concept of infinity is often understood as that for which nothing is too big. That for God, a galaxy is like a grain of sand. But conversely, the true understanding of of infinity, at least from the Jewish theological and mystical perspective, is that also for God, for infinity, there's nothing too small. So, if a galaxy is a grain of sand, a grain of sand is is a galaxy. I always sort of um found it very moving the line from William Blake's poem where he says, "To see the world in a grain of sand and heaven in a wild flower, hold infinity in the palm of your hand and eternity in an hour." And I don't know Blake's meaning, but I'll tell you what it what it evokes in me is this idea that from a godly perspective, it's not just that nothing is overwhelming, no matter how big it is, because God is even bigger. But there's another side of that coin, which is that it doesn't matter how tiny something is, how seemingly insignificant it is, the seemingly insignificant or trivial is meaningful and in fact, infinitely meaningful. Now, this is very heady stuff. So, how do we ground this a bit? Well, one very simple application of this worldview is that there's no such thing as an insignificant good act. That sometimes we want to do something global and we want to change the whole world and in fact, that can become a distraction when all we need to do is focus on the next right thing in front of us. Or like the environmentalists say, act think globally, act locally. Or uh as Michael Franti said, "Water pistol man full of ammunition squirting out fires on a worldwide mission, but did you ever think to squirt the flowers in your own backyard?" And he spells out, by the way, what that means. I thought that was a little heavy-handed at the end. He basically says he should be spending more time with his kids, and that that is the ultimate form of political activism, but >> [sighs] >> a poignant sentiment nonetheless. At any rate, my friends, the point is, by the way, if you get my references, whether it's spearhead or it's Blake, or uh Son of Sven Goolie, that one I didn't make earlier, so don't think that you lost your mind. But, that's actually, I think, where I saw The Incredible Shrinking Man. If you understand any of my references, please make me feel a little bit less alone here in YouTube land, and just put up your hand in the comments and say that you understood my reference, or at least if you Googled it, and now you understand my reference. Ladies [snorts] and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, from God's perspective, nothing is insignificant, and the global and the super personal are all one in his eyes. And when we do something small, we're actually doing something massively meaningful, and there is no distinction in God's eyes. That's one application of this idea. But, I want to go even deeper. I want to go even deeper. And I want to say like this, let us say that The Incredible Shrinking Man actually is speaking about something even more than the relative meaning of even seemingly trivial or small. Let us say that he's positing that his shrinking as a separate entity will ultimately lead him to become subsumed within the everything. That when he'll cease being a separate something, he will become one with the everything, capital E. Or like the Baal Shem Tov said in Yiddish, "Got is alles un alles is Got." God is all and all is God. That the the false state of separation, which is the conscious ego, causes us to operate as if God is not all there is. Now, obviously, even though it's a false worldview, it is necessary for free choice, which is part of God's plan. So, we are imbued with this default setting of thinking that we are separate entities, but we're meant to overcome that, and to realize that ultimately nothing exists apart from Hashem, and that everything is an extension of his absolute existence. And I say absolute existence, meaning everything else, created existence, is relative existence. It only exists because it's being made to exist. Hashem's existence is absolute. It exists because it exists. And that the ultimate state of self-refinement is not to become a better, more polished something, but to surrender into being one with the everything. And in fact, it sounds like maybe The Incredible Shrinking Man is alluding to that in his little soliloquy there at the end. He he talks about acceptance. He uses that word acceptance. I might also use the word surrender. The Hasidic mystical term would be bittul, which means nullification, but it has to be understood. Nullification doesn't mean getting rid of the ego. It means that the ego becomes dissolved into and then returns to source, so that there's no longer the illusion of separation. And that's something that we can do consciously, even while remaining in our embodiment. And in fact, in in in Hasidic thought, that's the ultimate state of being. Is to be in your embodiment, so that you can actually perform acts of goodness and kindness in the physical world as an emissary of God, but to consciously realize that you do not exist separately, and that therefore surrendering to his will is not a struggle, it's not a an abrogation of self-will. It's actually the ultimate expression of self-will, because you have become aligned with your true self, meaning the one. That when you realize theologically everything is the one, and you get your ego out of the way, the ego, the EGO, the edge and God out, and you realize that that's the lower self, the false self, and now you [snorts] have a true self, which is this oneness concept, now doing the will of God becomes the most natural thing. It just flows. Just flows seamlessly. And so, perhaps The Incredible Shrinking Man is a metaphor for a person who's watching his ego shrink into nothingness, and he's terrified at first. It is terrifying. Incredible Shrinking Man is is he's scared most of the movie. He's terrified. And in the end, he finds peace, right? I mean, [clears throat] listen to this parable. At first, it's terrifying. My ego is slipping away from me. And usually, when does that start to happen? What's the advent of ego deflation? Crisis, right? Hitting rock bottom, right? So, my ego is falling apart, and it's terrifying because where will I be? What will I be? What will I be left with? And then there's this sweet acceptance, serenity. And not from a fatalistic point of view, like, "Well, I guess there's nothing left to fight anymore." But, no, it's blissful. It is actually life-affirming. It's not uh it's not self-annihilation. It's actually self-actualization in the truest sense. I'm no longer going to persist in this illusion of separate selfhood. I'm going to allow myself to experience life as albeit a a sentient extension of God's being, but an an extension of God's being nonetheless. And that my loss of separate selfhood is nothing to grieve over. It's what I feared, right, the whole time. I'm afraid of it, but it's actually something to celebrate, to be joyous over. To realize that this is this is my true self. I finally become myself. Now, obviously, you know, people are Listen, I really don't have patience for people who Everyone's allowed to be triggered. It's only it's only natural. It's only human. But, you know, you got you got to uh use your brain. So, please don't write in my comments below and be like, "That sounds like uh brainwashing that a cult would use and tell you that you Yeah, your true self is when we beat you down and you forget about yourself." Yes, like any powerful idea, it can be weaponized. Any good idea has been weaponized. If it hasn't been weaponized, it's probably not a good idea. Did you know that, by the way? If something's never been corrupted, it's probably not a powerful idea to begin with. All right. So, obviously, in the wrong hands, you could use this to break somebody down and tell them, "Forget about yourself, and just become one with the group, and follow the leader." And Okay. Obviously, you can destroy somebody and exploit them with this same idea. Okay? So, then be careful what you nullify yourself to. Be careful. Don't nullify yourself to some nut, okay? Don't nullify yourself to some fleeting uh ideology flavor of the month that comes and goes. Be be selective. Be smart. You're a smart person. You got this far in a nerdy video like this, you must be smart, or pretentious and pretending to be smart. >> [laughter and gasps] >> I trust you. Nullify yourself to the one, capital O. To the everything, to the all. Okay? And uh yeah, at the other side of that surrender is incredible productivity. So, here's here's the the paradox, is that the thing that I thought was going to make me into nothing has actually brought me into oneness with the everything. Powerful, right? I thought I was losing myself. I was actually discovering myself. And that that's what the concept of surrender really is. Self-nullification, ego deflation. So that we can >> [clears throat] >> be aligned with and an instrument for God's will. Powerful stuff. Powerful powerful stuff. At any rate, I don't know if the people involved in The Incredible Shrinking Man are still around. Um, you know, Jack Arnold was the director. Now, he passed away in 1992. Uh, the screenplay was by Richard Matheson. He passed away in 2013. Also co-written. Richard Matheson wrote the original book. And uh co-written by Richard Richard Alan Simmons. He passed away in 2004. So I can't ask any of these people. But and I can't ask William Blake either. But uh those are my thoughts. You can share share your thoughts down below. All right.