Grand Pre-Selichos Farbrengen with Rabbi YY Jacobson

foreign [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] I know I ain't love no matter [Music] oh yeah where wherever [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] the night following Manuka following the rest of Shabbos the serenity the Manuka of Shabbos we welcome you we come out to you give us your ear from heaven to listen to to embrace the praise and the prayers the person who wrote this poet who wrote this very powerful an emotional poem that said in the Slick is the first night of Slickers foreign the serenity of Shabbos why that term which brings us to another question this is already discussed by The Authority Catharines why the first Slickers according to that ashkenazim first look is always my toy Shabbos always Sunday especially the others it's always always you start massage [Music] it's also interesting the others are done early in the morning Monday Tuesday early in the Bachelors so the first one could have been Sunday early in the morning no it has to be Daft that's the minute not like the other ones in fact it would have been my sharpest right away but since according to Kabbalah you don't say that you'd gimmel made this the 13 attributes of compassion and Slickers you don't say it at night only after Qatar is after midnight so therefore many communities as we do here we wait till one o'clock in the morning after Hudson after Hudson is midnight but you want to do it after commit suicide is as close as possible there's an interesting Allah that there are more brings in in it comes already from the reshining from the Mario from the term of sadashan the Raj says it it's a very interesting custom that if Rosh Hashanah is on Monday or Tuesday you don't start slick history before you start a week earlier why they say because you need at least four days of Slickers for shashan is Monday or Tuesday you start with Champions at best you have two days Sunday and Monday so you start a whole week earlier so you have a whole week till the Rosh Hashanah falls out on Thursday s like this year it's not a problem because you have Sunday Monday Tuesday and Wednesday if rosh hashan is you have Thursday Friday a full six days but if Rosh Hashanah falls out earlier in the week you're not gonna have four days of solicitly you start a week earlier why do you need four days of Slickers what's wrong with one day what's wrong with two days why four days you know why you know who says this you know the source very good listening in class and we did Rabbi katowski got it from he made it up okay so I'll tell you very good very good so the lavush gives a reason another reason he says that the minute by many was the fast the serious 10 days but four of those days you can't fast because two days are Rosh Hashanah Shabbos it's fatigue so you're missing four days you do Slickers four days to fast for four days it's an interesting explanation challenge the problem is the Gamora clearly says and learned it out from the posit that when you eat out of him keeper it's considered a fast in fact it says a person who eats out of him Kipper it's like you fasted on the 9th of tissue and the 10th of tissue so you may say only three days not four days so there's another answer what's his first what's your first name huh the fall Rafael rafale fall and your father brings healing is adaptive so it works so there's a explanation that's brought from two of the great poiskem one is that terrorist scan him comes from Vienna the 16th century and the eliarab the earlier who was the rub of dying in Prague known as the earlier with the Next Generation rebellious Shapiro they both bring this interpretation by carbon carbon tamid and pesach that you have to prepare for the carbon four days it's called the Mitzvah the Allah which means Hashem says to take the carbon basic on the tent of Nissan and offer it on the 14th of this so four days they would check it if there's any blemishes and the carbon Thomas you learn out from the carbon basic it says so the carbon Thomas II every day the sheep in the morning and the afternoon they had to prepare four days in advance and check for blemishes during the four days and then you could offer it why four days in garari and parishes boy the morale of Prague that sometimes a blemish doesn't appear the first day but you check the second day you'll find it may not find something the second they'll find the third day the fourth day this is the midst of a biker dalodium say the post scheme it says in your xiaomi in uh I think that by all the carbonis the lotion is they craft them in Paris Pinterest it says so you have to make yourself a carbon so if you make yourself a carbons you have to check yourself out for blemishes four days you need four days so that's why the slickest four days the just the function of Slickers four days is to examine the blemishes I may have in myself be ready to be able to experience myself as a carbon carbon from the word says closeness to be able to be fully close with the true source with the Ultimate Reality with my own Ultimate Reality and core so you have four days to check for the blemishes so Slickers needs to be four days if you only have one or two or three days you have to start a week before there should be a minimum four days that's what the post comes but here we have a general question if this is the case so then why start with sorry Shabbos so just make sure you have four days before the shashana to be able to do the download moment brings us back to the big question what's happening the main thing is to have four days of Slickers I understand four days so foreign the reason I can examine the animal for blemishes is because I'm not the animal I have objectivity I take a look at the Sheep at the lamb when the carbon basically goat sheep or a goat the lamb or a goat and I could check I could check if there are any blemishes any mumim that disqualified from being a carpenter that's as long as I have the objective ability to check out the for blemishes to excrutinize it when it comes to myself how am I supposed to do that if you would say Slickers for me if you would examine my blemishes okay but I'm saying Slickers for me you're saying Slickers for you how are you supposed to do that we have a principle in Gomorrah it's brought three times in shots The Prisoner who's in shackles can't emancipate himself in prison why because the hands the arms that are supposed to open the lock and liberate him those hands are tied down those arms are in shackles so the very instrument you're using to open the lock and get you out is part of the problem in covet I need somebody else to open the lock and get me out it's true physically it's even more true psychologically and emotionally the famous expression of Base foreign could look and examine all old leprosies besides his own so it's brought Inspire him that it's also metaphoric I see blemishes everywhere besides my own blemishes why even if I'm trying to work on myself but what am I using to figure out my blemishes I'm using the instruments that I blemished you know what I mean you guarantor himself needs a guarantor I'm using my brain or my uh my meat reasoning or my mind or my emotions whatever I'm using to figure out what are my blemishes what if they themselves are defined by the moment so I'm back I'm stuck again so we're saying the whole idea of slicknesses to be able to check these women who's checking them by the animal you have somebody else checking them so he has that distance that ability to be able to look at it objectively with myself I'm using my own instruments to figure out those blemishes when the instruments themselves may need the most healing and that's why the only way you could start slickus is uh that's why it starts with so Shoppers that's why he writes with Simon what's Shabbos you could only begin the whole avoid of Slickers the word is serenity Shabbos there's a gift where a person has the ability to be able to go in to a deeper place of Tranquility where I don't have to put up my defenses when a person is in a state of Manuka complete relaxation the nervous system is relaxed the the body is relaxed the mind is relaxed the soul is relaxed I don't have to put up defenses in order to protect myself there's a story in sanhedrons was the Roman governor in Judaism why is Shabbos different than any other day doesn't see a difference that the sambatian River hurls Rocks a whole week and Shabbos the river relaxes it's a physical metaphor for a psychological Dynamic if I feel that there's rocks being thrown at me consciously or unconsciously so I'm always defending myself from another rock being thrown on me so when your wife makes a comment yeah if what you're hearing is I don't mean your wife I mean if somebody's wife could be your wife too but your wife or your teenage child okay I'll be a little makes a comment and you find yourself being triggered terribly triggered what what happened in your mind is a big rock or maybe even a boulder or maybe even uh hahaha a mountain hurled at you and you have to defend yourself I'm completely not in a place where I can actually respond from a place of wholeness and love and serenity because the sambachin is throwing rocks on me what Shabbos stops to know iraqs we say in zoyard those who say kagavana Friday night it's from Zoya before right so what's the secret of Shabbos desire says foreign [Music] becomes a place of Oneness with the source of your own goodness and the Divine goodness foreign in all the worlds there's no other ruler what does this mean in a person's life Den did not judge on Shabbos it says I'll apply it to judgment there was no judgment on Shabbos what does it mean emotionally Shabbos is a day where you don't have to feel judged the sense of judgment we have to defend myself comes from a place where I feel this rocks thrown at me and it's true emotionally if a person did not develop that inner sense of attachment and serenity that allows you to be in a place of manure I am consciously and usually unconsciously always defending myself when I'm in a state of Defense I'm not in a relationship I'm just busy defending myself I'm busy it's called surviving not thriving each person according to their life story Shabbos is another massive Shabbos is the gift of Manuka you could relax why could you relax because you find a place in yourself that's wholesome you don't have to defend yourself if I'm in a wounded place if I'm in a broken place if I'm in a shattered place so then my relationships are defined by me being on the defense and I may not even notice it it's just so natural it's like a default mode this is where I live on Shabbos I can go into my expense of Consciousness where the soul gets revealed the soul is it says in time the soul is a derivative of divine Infinity so it's in a place of wholeness so I'm not afraid to look at my blemishes because I transcend them I can go to slickness from a place of absolute Manuka a place of true inner Serenity and Tranquility I could look at my blemishes because I am not my blemish the khaldine is an interesting there's something called the mai what's my my is when you bought fruits produce from a certain type of Jew and a Moritz who was not necessarily knowledgeable and scrupulous in the laws of giving of tithing so that said you had to redo it because you weren't sure you have to redo it interesting prepared it down in the beginning what if it's Shabbos and you bought the produce from this Jew who may be not scrupulous and you have to give myself before Shabbos you're not supposed to repair the fruits on Shabbos but it's already Shabbos and you're making us and you're relying on this produce and you said my what do you do so the mission of science you can ask the amorits on Shabbos if he gave mice and if he said yeah you could trust him what if it's Shabbos and he says yeah you can't you have to redo it so then somebody says wise he says even our mothers then meant something else I meant not a Jew who didn't have an education but it was just no it was indifferent apathetic but Shabbos was a different part came out now you'll ask me a question there are people who do lie on Shabbos we don't take away free choice from somebody we say yes so the shallah says there are certain sins that even your own Sahara doesn't have a tither for but if you try hard Sahara and you give it an imagination that itself doesn't have the it's not itself didn't think of this you took him to places he never thought of and he doesn't want it he doesn't need it but that's the Power of Choice the power of choices that ambam says reflects man's relationship with God is free and a person is free that power has no limits with choice you can go to the highest places the lowest places but the natural chemistry of the Jewish psycheon shamba says why do I lie again lying is a defense mechanism I'm running away from reality either I'm trying to be to I'm too embarrassed or I'm looking for validation you're in a good place what do you have to lie for lying is a pathetic defense mechanism and survival mechanism because I feel so unsafe in the world so I'm busy lying did I give my say I gave mice but Shabbos ah it's a difference nobody's throwing rocks the soul comes I could come out of hiding you realize you're one with Hashem you're a derivative of infinity you're really in a very very good place ah you have blemishes those blemishes don't constitute your essence your core they became attached to me but they're ultimately extraneous they're external so once you touch that space in you now you can examine your blemishes you know why because the eye transcends it completely it's like I'm examining the animal okay I can have empathy oh wow there's a blemish now you could say that's how he starts Lucas every day it's it's it's it's a Pity it's shameful that I feel that in order to survive I have to have these moments I have to limp I have to I mean I mean psychologically speaking it's a Pity that I feel that I have to resort to these types of qualities whether it's anger or jealousy or hatred or frustration or disassociate disassociation or emotional Detachment or numbness or freeze or fight or flight or form or whatever my response is in thought words actions and Midas I could be free and expansive and infinite but the anxiety in me takes over and says no this is how you have to live there's rocks being thrown at you is that's the energy of Shabbos so the devil said now he could start looking at the moment I had a teacher his name was Khan all over shalom he was a brilliant man he also wasn't so grounded in the physical world so he told us the story once and he was once on a flight probably from the only times he was on an airplane and he went with another another man it was also an interesting person so that the rapper sent him and his secretary his name was real to go meet the Israeli president who was visiting Canada his name was President Charles I was the third president of Israel so they went on the airplane they both didn't have they weren't accustomed to the experience he says we're sitting there and he he was trying to describe to us the seat belts she said at some point we had to put on the seat belt and I was trying and it wasn't working and Robert was trying it also wasn't working so I came up with an idea and I told them maybe you put on my seat belt and I'll put on your seatbelt good idea and we tried and it worked it's much easier to fasten somebody else's seat belt to lock somebody else up than to lock yourself up it's much easier it's much easier to be able to tell you how weird and crazy and ridiculous and foolish and horrible and narcissistic and and crazy and insane and Meshuggah you are empathetic than I it's foreign as long as I'm not in a place of real Transcendence I can't really see my blemishes because I'm examining them with my blemishes whenever you examine yourself with the blemishes themselves so then you're just looking to feel better you're just looking to ease the pain I'm just looking to get a little more validation it's part of my survival mechanism it can be real healing huh if you work on yourself you'll understand the word certainly you have to work at yourself to understand it not to understand the experience it when I can go into a place of Shabbos it's a whole different a whole different word then you can have the four days of bigger woman of bigger women why because at your core you're above them you don't need them you look at them and you could look at them like in the Bahamas fine I have them I can have empathy for them I can have compassion for them I may not be able to get rid of them right away I can look at them I can breathe them out but I don't Define Myself by them I don't give them the driver's seat to be able to control my life so the preparation for slickness is always a person having that inner knowledge and conviction and experience that you're approaching slikhism from that space in the Jew from the space and the soul which is in complete alignment with Hashem complete the lemonade it's not something you have to create that's your natural essential state everything else attaches itself later to the person and now you can critique me and I could listen to it I don't have to punch you back you know I'm not getting Rock there's no rocks at me there's no rocks I could listen to it from a different place when I don't have when I'm not in touch with that wholeness in me all I have is my Brokenness so if you start exposing it I'm dead of course I attack back and even if I learn not to attack because I like to be seen as a mensch but inside I implode maybe I won't explode but I'll implode because I have nothing else this this is me and if you're attacking me so what's left but if you're not attacking me the me is fine nobody's judging you you're in a good place you're a powerful person Hashem loves you your soul is it is nobody can take that away nobody can turn it even if you made mistakes and even if I made terrible mistakes can't be snuffed out now you have the luxury and the Comfort to be able to look at the moment and actually deal with them and say oh wow that's a blemish yeah I really don't need that anymore it worked for 40 years maybe 50 years maybe 60 years I needed it it was trying to keep me safe but you know what it's time to say butter and fine that's how a Drew can approach Lucas this answers one more question this Shabbos is called by juice shabboslichus that's why they're called Choppers Lucas the answer is because after Shabbos you say Slickers that somewhat complicated It episode why all other names of Shabbos are about things that happen on Shabbos we don't give Shabbos a name about something that's going to happen after Shabbos there's a concept in Allah you don't prepare for Shabbos for the weakness because shambus is not a preparation for a mundane day so when you have a name of Shabbos Shabbos the Shabbos itself is called Shabbos Shabbos parish is sharpest Hanukkah which blesses the month the blessing is on Shabbos on Shabbos we bless the new month one exception is the only name it's not about champas so you're defining Shabbos based on what happens after Shabbos something is off Shabbos becomes like a TOEFL for something after Shoppers they kill this so they never said that's not shot the Slick this is the Slick this is but the Slick is the Forgiveness on Shabbos is of a different level that lock is we don't say Shabbos we don't confess on Shabbos we don't do video on Choppers why if you confess and your sins are atoned it's the greatest pleasure for example you're not supposed to fast on Shabbos but if you have a tiniest column if you have a terrible dream and you want to fast in order to get rid of the consequences of the dream and that's going to bring you the pleasure you'll have to do it on Shabbos confession is going to bring you the pleasure of forgiveness it says Shabbos is the same letters like truvit tough Shin base Shabbos which is but they have the slickest of champas is a different type of Truth the chuva of Sunday is I want to be able to work on the blemish the chuva of Shabbos is I discover the place where there was never a blemish there's no blemish and there will never be a blemish because even if I have flaws and I have flaws and I have my insecurities and I made my mistakes and I have my sins Etc and even if things happen to you beyond your control that you're dealing with Brokenness it never affects the core of the Soul which is purely divine so what's the truth of Shabbos the truva of Shabbos the Slickers of Shabbos is you go to a place where the relationship was not affected where your beauty is absolute with your magnificence and your glory is infinite sacred and eternal and non-negotiable that Shabbos now once you descend from Shabbos now you can approach the Slickers the next level of Slickers to look at all the moments in me that's the Shabba Slickers so the Shabbos is not a preparation from its soy shops the Shabbos tunes into the core of Slicker of true forgiveness which comes from that place where you would never left that you have to return and then from that space now I could look at my blemishes because the eye that looks at the blemishes has that luxury and that comfort of distance where you can actually observe that which is not you you are not the blemish okay The Heist [Music] did it oh yeah yeah yeah yeah [Music] everybody join us [Music] I know [Music] judgment [Music] it's a whole different level yeah [Music] like I say amen [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign they say everywhere [Music] oh hello this is [Music] they know [Music] [Applause] I died like I know everybody [Music] like I know [Music] they save us [Music] I know yeah [Music] my [Applause] life [Applause] [Music] I know [Music] like I know [Music] send them my love [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you [Music] they say Los Angeles [Music] okay this priest look is fabrangian organized by the shul for which I'm very thankful we're all very thankful is dedicated by our dear friends of Remy and Rahul Spitz Mas David foreign Spitz who's also here tonight thank you and I want to bless them among all of us because with an amazing year of health Serenity happiness prosperity and all the time and all of you and all of us should have an incredibly blessed year and the most revealed and manifested way with all of your heart's desires should be fulfilled materially and spiritually and should be a year of of true Redemption individually and collectively for us the Jewish people and the whole world Amen that's very relevant to this year I just need a little history for the story there was a youth named was a son of ramager who was the son of Rebecca veg was considered one of the greatest luminaries of his generation and he had a son above Rome and he had a son to blade blade blade you're just like his father and above Rahm initially was very very opposed to hasidim and siddas but then ultimately made it to the katsukareba and he became a student of his and later he became a student of the famous ishbuzz and he became a true student of his and when he passed away became a rabbit in Lublin the city of Lublin that's where he lived the asafical terrorism his father couldn't deal with the fact that his son became a hasid his father completely cut off relations from his son but his grandfather he was really fine with him and until his end he was probably 22 whenever passed away around 22. okay Vega was fine with they tell a story once asked his grandson why do you go to Cuts what what swept you there so his grandson it was about to Vegas grandson so he had the you know he had the he had sharpness and depth he says why I wanted to answer your question there's a question I couldn't answer your question I could only answer in kotzk this is what question could you only answer in Cuts did you what question foreign what are you talking about the Gamora says we know that you have to Blow shuffle even Shabbos you have to shake Lilith on sukkas even if the first day shoppers dirab was excited explained xaida Shema is which means everybody is obligated to hear shafu not everybody knows how to block so Shabbos and you need it bloodhair chauffeur and you don't know how to blows you'll take the chauffeur and in your eagerness and enthusiasm do the Mitzvah you're going to walk four qubits in the public domain to carry it to bring it to the person who's an expert you're gonna forget so in order to avoid this Hazard this potential Hazard they said no but the same is true with Lilith I know time of the Mcgill and those days put him can also be Shabbos no mcgilla reading and no Lilith again you have to know how to shake the little live once you shake you don't know you may carry it on sharpest so we don't do it on Trump is only asks a question maybe he's going to take it foreign what's his question this is a classic example question you have to concentrate for a moment he asks as follows this is benaze holds when you're walking it's as though you're standing what does this mean usually if I walk four cubits initials it's around six feet or eight feet yeah yeah so I take a ball and I carry four amazing if I make an Akira you're liable I'm liable if it was a mistake after being a carbon Manhattan time of the business let's say I pick up the ball I pick up the ball and I walk six feet eight feet and then I stop even if I stop in my hand or I put down the ball so I'm kind of but as I says what happens if I take a ball and I take one step and I stop and then I pick it up and I take another step and I stop and then I pick it up why because you didn't work for Amos you only walked to a half armor one armor two arms you didn't walk four hours he didn't make a character when you're walking since you put down one foot you pick up another foot it's as though you're standing so even if you walk straight you're 20 feet 100 feet then as I says it's like you took a break between each step so maybe you didn't work for Amos because he took a break in between so you're not kind of ask to your xiaomi so coin to benaze how's anybody ever liable twice just brings it in Champions the answer is because it's only if you jump according to benaze if I'm playing playing ball and I jump eight feet I jump eight feet I take the ball and I jump eight feet now you're liable because you're amazing because you jumped so now listen to The Book of Vegas question since nigamara says what's the problem with Schaefer that you're gonna walk four cubitsues according to benaz I that wouldn't make you liable on Shabbos only if you jump but jumping with a Schaefer a Lilith is not a common thing you're not playing football and the rabbits didn't make a decree on something that's completely uncommon the point was somebody might forget and carry on Shabbos but this is already too far-fetched so the bonanza's opinion should be that you blow Cipher and Shake Lilith when the Choppers and we don't see any dissenting view in the chess everybody agrees but nobody says should argue and say no you do blue shy foreign questions that's not a problem unless you jump jumping is a Muslim the whole thing is not a Biblical prohibition to to to blow Schaefer it's a rabbinic problem you may carry but that's only that's only if you're at home alone it's only if you jump so be nice you should have disagreed that's his question gives answers he gives a few answers I think three answers four answers so Rebecca Vegas says no what does this have to do with you leaving your father and going to cutsc he says I went to answer your questions what are you talking about so he tells his father he tells us he said foreign for a person to jump four qubits in order to do a mitsu that's what I saw it's not almost so I answered your question I saw that the imrayamis of gare the imlayamus the get it EBA he says take a look in prichay office what does it say Ben azaiimer you remember huh heavy rods huh that you would have been Tama in fact in fact is says jump he also means running because in running you're not when you're taking a walk so now it's been as I said because he's explaining why he says you shouldn't Blowfish it's a Mitzvah so you're gonna be foreign have baked my heart is not there my soul is not there H Thomas took it on me if I'm doing it collapse might say to mine you know the old joke it's a good good old Jewish joke [Music] before he would give a before we'd give a give him before it was a fellow Schwartz he gets a call from his friend his friend is finkelstein's friend says this Saturday morning I found a new golf course I made an appointment for you and me we'll go golfing 8 30 in the morning be ready I'm gonna pick you up it's unbelievable golf place he says no way no way Saturday morning I now go to the synagogue he says you you haven't stepped foot into synagogue for 60 years but suddenly you're going to synagogue I mean Saturday morning we're going to play golf he says no more he says what happened to you because you remember gold you heard about this guy Goldstein who lives down the block he came from Russia he didn't have a nickel in his pocket today he's worth 600 million and some say is a billionaire and you know what he credits it to he credits it to going to show shop this morning he goes to surely pray to God and he made all of his money since I heard that story I go to that show I go to that show so I'm not going golfing anymore shop this morning he says come on be honest you're an atheist you don't believe in Senegal you don't believe in God you don't believe in prayer you're telling me that Suddenly at the age of 69 you now go to synagogue and you talk to God he says no you didn't understand what I'm saying Goldstein goes to synagogue to talk to God I go to synagogue to talk to Goldstone they say that this is a moving story there was a you may remember him there was a Jew his name was Simon wiesenthal Simon wiesenthal was a Nazi Hunter he lived in Vienna he passed away in 2005. he was in many concentration camps and he dedicated his life to search for Nazis and to find them in the in the 1990s he was already an older man they honored him a committee of European rabbis Central Committee of European rabbis honored Simon wiesenthal at a dinner at a banquet and he spoke and he shared a story that happened six decades earlier was talking to rabbis she said I never shared the story but I want to share it to you with you and he said when he was liberated he was liberated for my thousand the Blazer silver was the rabbi the chief Rabbi of Cincinnati it's a very very prominent man the Blazer silver so he went to Europe to help the refugees to help the survivors so Simon wiesenthal said he saw me and he told me that he arranged he got from the government from the American government from The Liberator is a place that they can use for a show and he arranged a public service for anybody who wants remember these are Jews who were in camps for years they didn't have a show they didn't have there's no card there's nothing so he arranged this for the survivors so he invited me to come so I told him I'm not coming so he said why so I said to him that there was a Jew who smuggled in a city to math house and I was in awe of him because of the Nazis would see him with a sitter they would shoot him immediately so why in danger why risk your life with something that's unnecessary and I was so respectful and in awe of this man that the city was so precious that he was ready to put his life in danger and smuggle it into math house it was I was awestruck by this until the next day he said until the next day I saw what this guy is up to he used to sit there and he rented it to people who would give him a piece of bread Jews would give him a piece of bread for him to give them the citizen they cadaver he said imagine this person it takes the last piece of bread morsel of bread that people had if you can even call it bread and uses the sitter to take the bread from them when I saw what a religious Jew can do I decided I'm never stepping foot into a synagogue where these people hang out and I was about to turn away and to turn around and move around and the blaze of silver is talking to himself he says which means you're a fool you're a fool and I wondered why am I a fool he could say he disagrees with me so I turn around then curiously I say why am I a fool he said I'll tell you why you're a fool you're looking at this one person who exploited the needs of vulnerable people who needed to pray and used the sitter to get their last piece of bread that's what you're focusing on why don't you focus on the dozens and dozens of people who were ready to give away their bread just to be able to pray why don't you look at that look at these people they had nothing but their spiritual connection their faith their connection to Transcendence to their jewishness to their Humanity they were not ready to give up and they were ready to give up something that was priceless in the Nazi concentration camps to be able to hold on to this prayer book why don't you focus on that tune into these people some reason though said I listened and I came to the show I came to the surface you have to know what to look at what to see what to see in people I could look at this I could look at that so this is what the label egg was telling his Aida a new year starts I could do things without being present I'm not present I'm always running to something else but he said there I learned jump what does that mean in a person's life it means to be present to be fully present emotionally whatever you're doing to do it with a premius to be there to be there fully with your mind with your heart with your soul so much static so many distractions so much anxiety I can't be in Vegas to be able to be to be fully present in Vegas to be a year we should be able to be fully present fully present with ourselves fully present with our souls fully present with our hearts fully present with our loved ones which means fully present with Hashem fully present fully present in reality here [Music] nah if she saw like [Music] the sheets [Music] not enough [Music] [Applause] [Music] I am my name is [Music] oh God [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] in the Sun [Music] to live [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] bye [Music] bye bye bye [Music] [Applause] again [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] bye [Music] bye baby [Applause] [Music] I have to be honest I don't feel so worthy of telling the following story it's so so intense and it's so emotionally loaded and heart-wrenching I almost feel like I may desecrate it I may violate it it's so sacred and pristine and holy [Music] you know sometimes when you say something over you have to be sensitive to the Holiness of it I don't want to I don't want it to get contaminated through the vessel ah so the only eights is that I should say Hashem [Music] as it's explained in swardim what that means what do we say it before you say it before the whole Avenue it's a beautiful Posse it's from [Music] explains when you're standing you're standing in the presence of Atmos he's standing in front of Hashem himself why don't I start giving speeches be quiet he's gonna start giving speeches even making sign language wasn't a good ending over there when somebody made sign language in front of the Romans you could look it up here I'm standing in front of Malik my start with speeches speak 19 speeches I have [Music] you open my lips I'll just be a conduit for your words so he says Hashem will speak through me so then the vessel is not contaminated uh the composer of this song is a juvenile to straw by the name of Rabbi Hilo Pali and he recently shared a story [Music] he has a daughter-in-law whose name is bathsheva but Sheva Pali she married his son 's son last year the night of tuba of there was a bus terrible bus accident near the mall RAV shefa in Jerusalem there was a boss without a driver and the bus lost control and killed the mother and her two daughters shoshana glashden and her two daughters [Music] one was seven I'm almost two they died they passed they were killed together with their mother who was pregnant Advanced pregnancy there was another young woman there but Sheva Pali Rabbi Hilo Paulie's daughter-in-law [Music] she wasn't killed she was taken to the hospital unconscious but she lost both of her legs from above the knee for a while she was unconscious and they sedated her especially because of all the procedures they had to do finally she woke up in the hospital and her husband who was just married to her for a short time they weren't they were newlyweds a new couple fresh couple he was sitting there [Music] and what was her first question to him [Music] this is not a question you planned for this is a question she woke up it was straight you know straight out of her soul sprayed out of her Salters she looked at him and she said tell me the truth would have you ever married me in this condition would you marry such a girl that was the question you could understand what was behind the question behind the question is are you going to stay married to me and even if you stay married to me do you want to stay married to me you know maybe you'll stay married to me because I'm a rahmana's case I'm a Pity case so be a nebuchadnews but is this the woman you would marry this was his question this was a question his father shared the story his father said you know this is not a question they prepare you for in Yeshiva it's like you know what would Rebecca Vega say right you don't get training for this question how do you answer this question [Music] he said he didn't know how great his son was but then he learned how great his son was son looked at his wife and said you're asking me if before I married you if I would have met a young woman who's missing both legs what have I married her probably not I would I would try to find somebody else but that's a completely irrelevant question [Music] because now we're married so this is not a story that happened to you this is a story that happened to us [Music] and then he looked at his wife and he said [Music] which means I want to create a new covenant with you I want to renew our vows I want to so to speak create a new a new type of marriage with you [Music] what was he saying he was saying I know this is not the old marriage it's a different marriage different relationships a different marriage a different experience what have I chosen this I would have not chosen this why should I choose it before I got married now I'm married to you now we're one we're in this relationship but we have to create a new covenant a whole new covenant different paradigms different expectations different trajectory different relationship and if Hillel said finally understood the prayer in illah those who died may not know it but after the avoida there is a there's a there's a line there there's a line where the Jew says in the musif of him after that turns to Hashem and says Tel Aviv is trigger arouse the heart of your spouse the Jewish people [Music] we're your spouse Tel Aviv arouse the heart create a new covenant with your spouse [Music] let her soul be precious in your eyes to tyrannable cleanser with pure water the pillow said he finally understood what the words are foreign if I may if I may it's not so comfortable but I want to use the the holy sacred Priceless words of this young man to his to his wife to touch us each one in our own way nobody can ever compare One Life to another life one difficulty another difficulty it's foolish it's pathetic and it doesn't even make sense but we could learn from each other because we're all connected [Music] his wife asked him would you have you ever married me he didn't lie he said no I probably would have not married right he didn't lie he wasn't inauthentic oh sure sure he wasn't in denial of the fact of course he wouldn't have married her it was a regular issue but he would look for someone else not because God forbid he has anything against because it's such a tragic difficult situation and he didn't lie to her about that he said but you're talking to me after we got married you know I think in so many of our lives we have a trajectory what life is supposed to look like what marriage is supposed to look like what your children are supposed to look like what you're supposed to look like what is it based on it's based on our own fantasies based on our own imaginations and then we confront the reality of Our Lives what is the reality of your marriage what is the reality of your children what is the reality of your mental state what is the reality of your soul suddenly you come face to face with your past with your presence with adversity with pain especially those of you who have dedicated time and energy to go on deeper Journeys towards the inner recesses of your soul and you emerge and you look at yourself and it's the different person then you once imagined you were or you will be and many of us remain stuck in frustration of what could have been what should have been what would have been was still triggered with anger and jealousy and frustration and resentment which are normal these are part of part of the human condition we get it we get it this one is still stuck in what his children are supposed to look like and what her children are supposed to look like and what his career or home or emotional psychological spiritual physical Financial State any equation you want to use and what does that do what it does is two things [Music] first of all I'm spending much of my energy on something that doesn't exist and more important I can't be present to that which does exist I can't show up to that which does exist is means nobody can heal anybody else's pain all I can do is face my own pain steer it stare at it without averting my gaze look at it without fear or even if I have fear not to allow the fear to dictate my life to be able to look at it to be able to embrace it with empathy and to have the courage to create a new covenant with my reality because this is my mission because this is my journey because this is my light that I need to bring to the world and it's very different than the light I imagined five years ago ten years ago certainly 40 years ago 50 years ago it's a new bris it's a New Covenant it's a covenant with the relationship I have right now which includes all aspects of my personality and all aspects of my story and all aspects of my narrative and all aspects of my journey that's debris khadosha and it's a different Covenant and it's different than everybody else's Covenant because you have your Covenant that you make with your nation man with your God and with your life and I have to make a covenant with my soul and my life and my God and when you do that you inspire others to do that I can't change somebody else it's futile I can only face my adversity with courage with dignity with empathy and with a lot of love and then we Inspire I inspire you inspire we Inspire other people to do the same it's very very intimate it's very sacred it's very vulnerable and it's extremely sensitive [Music] I could live in the question why why why why why why good question no question no question that it's a good question but again what I'm doing is the one said in a class don't ruin your life by trying to understand it don't ruin your life by trying to understand it foreign Don't Force life into your limited brain it's just it's not fair to your life brain has a function beautiful function figure out mathematical equations or even better figure out good Rebecca Vegas and gileena shots know what your brain is for but I ruin my life if I try to fit it into my brain and have control of it just a form of control Hashem means give up control be a conduit an amazing teaching of the helica the holy Magid of misrich ah he says it says the beginning of the afternoon that chapter lift up your voice like a chiffer vahage and tell my nation all their sins their transgressions let them repent asks the market why Harem and what if it's like a trumpet why does he need the image of a musical instrument raise your voice and yeah a lawyer once told me that in law school they taught him they said like this if the law is on your side yell the law if emotions are on your side yell emotions if neither are on your side just yell everywhere but here the reborn Islam says I want you to raise your voice fine foreign you know what the market says he says don't tell anybody their sins if you're not a chaifer what's a chiffer a chauffeur never creates the sound who creates the sound the person blowing the chauffeur is the conduit that carries the sound delivers it to the other side and allows for it to resonate far and wide I mean her mates the chauffeur has to be hollowed out if you take a show for the RAM and you don't Hollow it out the voice the sound will not travel through it so we hollow out the show for it should be Hollow to be empty aloe and then it could travel through if you have holes in the chauffeur is split if it's cut if there's a hole here if there's a hole here it affects the sound that's going out so the market says if you want to tell somebody their sin make sure you're a chaifer what's all I am is a chauffeur I'm just a conduit if it's coming from my ego it's futile it's counterproductive I'll tell you how weird you are and you'll become defensive and tell me how crazy I am I'll tell you how many mistakes you make and you'll get defensive and give it back to me the way you know how to Harem become a Schaefer means I'm emptied from all ego I'm not even here I'm a conduit what are you a conduit for so the market says in life you want to be a conduit for the Divine energy that's vibrating every moment through creation the first thing is Hashem blue can you be a conduit for that energy to come through you Hashem is speaking Hashem is a GID as an artery as a channel that channels the circulatory system the blood yagate from the Russian GID I'm Shaka Hashem that's the hardest work the hardest work is that I shouldn't speak I should be a conduit because that means I'm not here who's not here the I that interrupts the flow is not here so who's here everything is here Infinity is here I'm just a channel then you become the most powerful person because you're the most powerless person when you become the most powerless person you become the most powerful person because it's not you it's the Divine flowing through you so the market says if it's going to get personal you will never be able to influence the moment I'm not a conduit so now I'm the one who's defining the energy and then I get upset that you're not accepting it of course you can't accept it I gave you something that was affected by my own stuff we can only affect other people to the point that we are involved I can't affect another person robotically because I say the right thing the how Carol Young once said it was the famous uh he once said uh you only change people to the extent that you're ready to change yourself someone wants to change his spouse wants to change his children's one has to change his friends you ready to the extent that you're ready to change yourself what does that mean if I'm ready to evolve myself that's exactly how much I'll be able to affect other people Harem Kashif um [Music] that a person makes it's a very very humbling experience and it's also the most powerful experience of life it's the ability not to have to look back constantly it's the ability to be able to forgive is the ability to be able to embrace it's the ability to be able to say I'm a conduit and in that process not only don't you lose anything you gain everything why as long as my Schaefer I plug from both sides because I want to own it so now when you have something I'm busy comparing myself to you but when I'm a chef I'm just a conduit so everything I channel to you comes right back to me because my definition is just being a conduit for the Divine energy so any energy that you have yeah I don't need your money you know why I got your money I don't need your happiness I have your happiness how do I have it by just being a conduit so it's on a channel if I'm defined as a channel and nothing gets stuck here so I could become one with a person I could become one with myself this brisk hadasha means that I have to liberate myself from any egotistical considerations of what my life is supposed to look like what it's not supposed to look like stop controlling it stop me manipulating stop exploiting it open it up Let It Be Free it's a Brisk hadasha it's a New Covenant that you never had before and when I can open myself up to the New Covenant you'll see miracles happen because what happens is you allow the true Infinite Energy not to stay blocked but to come through to come out so I want to bless myself and bless all of you that this year we should be able to become the ambassadors of change that we want to see in the world around us the change I want to see in the world around me don't wait for the world around you no can I wait I should become the change I want to see anywhere else I should become the transformation I want to see anywhere else not in order as a ploy that you'll do it it's not about you Every Soul knows exactly what it has to do souls are powerful a soul is nobody has to teach anybody what to do says [Music] I'm gonna be looking for a job then I know but it'll be just fine I'm not worried ah Yeshua comes to my shopping and he says I want you to arrest elded and made that because they're prophesizing without Authority [Music] you know they left the kahilla right they made a breakaway minion and they're saying the vua you have 70 guys under you it's full control and these two guys they're talking in the name of God not under you well oh my God arrest them client right she says put them in prison another chapter now she is make them leaders and they'll already be destroyed don't worry you want to destroy somebody right nominate them make sure he gets elected his life is over so what is my chance sir Maisha tells yahushua you got it wrong [Music] you're jealous with me you don't get it you're jealous for me you think I live in this competition race oh they're prophets oh my God somebody else is opening a shop I'm a can they have to leave let me tell you about my dream you know what my dream is not Elder the maid that should be in a VM to November I want every Jew to be a prophet I don't own God I don't own Judaism I don't own love I don't own the energy the moment I own it it's not that the moment I own it it's ego it's not that that's not my should have been that's what Joshua had to understand before he became the next leader that's why we could trust Maisha and that's why you could trust my shin every generation because moisha and every generation what does he says [Music] it's a whole different it's a different paradigm and this is not words not cerebral either you get it oh I don't get it either it's it's in my bones it's in my nervous system where it's not in my nervous system it's not information this is the daily battle with a peaceful battle not a bloody battle a peaceful battle to be able to have empathy for the anxiety and the depression and the ego and the fear and the insecurity and the Brokenness and all the other adjectives whereby why relax using oh have empathy and let it breathe it out like a chauffeur just feel Breathe It Out let the chauffeur and then you'll see everything will flow through even if someone knows what to do every summer will heal and here it is absolute love [Music] and we see this more and more today you know people I often get letters from people or comments they listen to some of the classes some of the sure or read some of the writings and they lament and many very very innocently really innocently and with a pure heart say that they feel that sometimes I identify talk about the fact that people you know as children went through difficult situations difficult Journeys their psyches were broken especially if there was an emotional neglect or never mind abuse never mind molestation physical emotional intimate people's various struggles with their development physically psychologically emotionally and to be able to identify that and have empathy for it and then see what it's doing to me today will often write to me in very good intention people people I know good really good intention you know Israel and they say you know this is a new system that allows everybody to get off the hook golden days there was a yesahara and you took a hammer and you banged the XR over the head and the atar hopefully was destroyed if he came back he took a hammer the next day and you knew you had bad in you and you had to fight and you're no I went through this I went through that I went through this with me it's with my father my mother my brother my sister my teacher my community nature my God I'm the only one who's not guilty so this is a liberal approach that takes people off the hook look what it does to sleuth no slickness who i'm guilty I'm guilty the Holocaust is guilty Stalin is guilty they're what they did what do you want from me I'm a free guy oh okay it's a very very good question a very important question it's a very very important question it's coming from a good place [Music] so I asked him I say you know you know between you and me know that you're suffering from a certain addiction already for years [Music] you know you're dealing with mental challenges already for years and every year is shashana you made a resolution this year you're going to control yet Sahara You're Gonna Knock it with a hammer over your head you're gonna get rid of it you know that when you started to have your problems in your marriage and you went to a mentor you went to Arab and they told you you have to learn more Musser well you have to learn more sudas or you have to learn more gamori have to learn more and you didn't resolution from now I'm not going to respond with kindness and you know that 15 years later you're still in the same rut you're still in the same rut your Hammer is not so effective you know as well as I know and even if outwardly you're doing everything right you know how miserable you are how much struggle you have and you know how difficult the situation in your house is and you know that certain children of yours are reacting to everything because they fail it consciously or unconsciously [Music] okay since it's a fabrengan and it's before so we can be open so I'll tell you the mice Australia [Music] a good guy what they call you know what they call an America good guy a really good guy you know I don't know exactly how you define that but you know those he's a good guy what's how do you get into that bracket huh I don't know but it's like an expression he's a good guy somehow it means he's normal he's not too this way he's not too that way he's a good guy so he's one of those good guys you know he's mentioned he's normal you could talk to him he's not a free he's not freaked out he's not a fundamentalist good guy good guy and also a nice person as much as he tries there's something in his marriage where he's constantly driven to do things that destroy his marriage we have to get into details here but constantly he makes a resolution boom fails again and again and again and again tried everything group and therapy and program and recovery and it works and then he fails and it works and fails the poor guy tried everything and he cries I want to fix it but like a d book A D book takes over and and his body like just loses control and people complain this is true with tempers and it's true with mental illness and it's true with depression and it's true with anxiety and it's true with misery and it's true with unhappiness and they go to somebody and they say it's Sahara [Music] I learned it I learned it 30 times and I want and I you Davin every day you dive in a hole to fill you stop extra 30 seconds foreign but here's what happened with this younger man he went on a journey a journey of discovery he found out that when he was four years old something terrible terrible happened to him not by his fault he was four years old somebody did something to him that was terrible really terrible repulsive disgusting abominable and suddenly for the first time in his life realized that his entire addiction is not who he is his entire addiction is based on an identity that he developed as a result of the horrible hezek the horrible Affliction that was done to him that forced him to develop certain survival skills and his body developed a certain way and this is where he gravitates and for the first time in his life he can make a choice because he could say oh this is my trauma talking but there's a me pre that is so what just happened for the first time he understood what his yet Sahara looks like where it came from and he understood for the first time it's not him it's not him you're not your yet Sahara you're not that person you don't need it you don't want it it became who I am today simply it's my best way to survive and you know what yeah did a very good job it kept you alive till 51. or 61 or 71 or 41 or 29 or whatever the age and if you're lucky and you're hearing this at 19 and you get it you're lucky you shouldn't have to wait till you're 61. foreign [Music] oh wow [Music] so who took him off the hook how did this man get over the hook by understanding what happened to you you actually for the first time in your life have Kira when we just say there's evil in you get rid of it you often don't have any choice you know why it's part of me and I don't know what to do and the reason you don't know what to do is because this is not a verbal choice that you made at an intellectual choice this choice is in the cells of your body it's in your nervous system it's in maybe even before you ever developed memory it may be in your unconscious you don't even have any period you're I'm a complete carbon and I'm screaming at myself yeah it's a hurry it's a hurry it's Sahara and in the meantime they said Sahara is sitting and throwing a party because he has absolute control over me what we're trying to help people what we're trying to tell people is actually to be able to take responsibility it's it's so paradoxical people think that the more we understand ourselves the less responsibility we take the more excuses we give ourselves is exact opposite it's because we don't trust people we think we're evils and that's why we're coming up with this distorted idea that if people understand who they are they're going to give themselves nobody wants to give themselves excuses I don't know one person I don't know one person who sits down and says you know this year I really want to be a miserable person I want my marriage to be as this as miserable as possible I want my kids to hate me I want to hate them I want to be filled with anxiety and I would love to pursue every addiction tremendous passion I I don't see these people everyone is going Unity tell me how tell me how give me the techniques people are not looking for excuse but if you can identify say you know this is not you look it's not you this happened to you instead of telling people what's wrong with you tell them what happened to you let's find out what happened and then you'll see yeah it's an is upon him it's embarrassing for me to think that this is how I have to live I don't have to live I'm a free person I'm filled with love a fellow told me the other day fellow told me the other day [Music] he went through a lot in life he went through a lot and he worked on himself tremendously tremendously and he had no support you need a support system we need a support system to him and he taught me it's so moving he said he realized that the greatest damage that was done to him was that the people who did what they did to him took away from him the ability to love that was the greatest damage he always thought the greatest limitation was what was taken away from him his confidence and his his security and his power he tells me the worst thing they did to me they took away from me the ability to laugh I'm a lover I'm a lover he says I want a love I couldn't because when I loved it came back with a dagger so I knew you can't love if you love means you're attached if you're attached you can hurt me if I say I don't need love I don't need love I need validation I don't need love so we spend our whole life getting validation a guy told me he spends 18 hours in the office why do you need it was your talented kid what do you need he said I need to make sure everybody in that office knows that this company needs me without me it falls so that's his whole mission in life call it yet Sahara why is it there why is it there there's such a wound in him he doesn't need that nobody needs validation nobody is looking for validation in this world not even yyj believe it or not nobody is looking for validation you know what you're looking for you want to know what you're looking for [Music] him put in 10 books of psychology people are looking for attachment foreign things you know when a guy comes to you for a favor yeah yeah you know the mice comes to a guy's house he's collecting so the host is a nice guy here in Muncie he says I'm about to eat dinner you want to join me I came to eat I'm at uh she tells his wife you know what that means when somebody says no we know what it means right in our culture bring another bring another portion of fish she brings it in 10 seconds he ate it up he says you want soup to eat up bring the soup she brings the soup he finishes the whole soup maybe you want some chicken flakes bring out he eats the chicken eats the meat eats outs then he looks at them and he says kampot you guys know what campotes huh dessert he says Cambodia why am I telling the story yeah you ask for a hundred things say I want a hundred things you know how a Jew answers right you did the same thing where did I do the same thing so look impartial saying [Music] what does Hashem want Kim only now you know the list afterwards what am I asking you an 18 check plus plus plus plus plus plus plus [Music] Plus from you okay thanks so now Hashem what's the fourth so he says means I learned from you when you asked for a hundred things it's one it's Hashem I'm not asking I'm asking for one there's only one thing we all ask for thousands of things but you're really asking for one thing if you go back to it you're asking for one thing that's what you're really asking for you're asking you want a good house and you want to be able to have money for tuition and you want someone bias and you want health and you want partners and you want whatever you're gonna ask for this is he gets it that's what we say to them David is the embodiment of the Jewish psalm foreign what is it you want real Vegas that's it's fascinating and in science today science psychology that's what they're coming to it's attachment you want real attachment real and what's real attachment so they say attachment to your mother your father yeah it's attachment to your mother and father it's attachment to the source of reality which is mother father and at the core it's Hashem s I want to be a conduit I want to be doubled what a Jew is looking for is that you're a channel for Oneness that's what we're really looking for everything else is a distraction I we ask for a thousand things and that's the Quran don't distract yourself with it how did I get into this [Music] huh I'm glad you all shut off your brains good good as long as your hearts are here I don't need your brains yeah broken letter a letter about Brokenness oh wow so so so nobody wants to be of the free pass to be able to have a miserable or destructive life nobody mom is nobody when all we tell people is there's evil in you get on with your life what it does is it just keeps it stuck with full of Shame and guilt and I may behave normally but the anxiety kills me and there's certainly no lease but if you can identify and see The rhythms and see the panemius now you could breathe things out you could spit things out and most importantly you could see you could see the menu you could see the attachment in you you could see the love in you you could see the creativity in you the shepherdish kite is Yiddish creativity you could see the compassion the caring the passion the fire the enthusiasm you could see that you're a wonderful person you're a good person you're a good person you're not a bad person take that CD out of the brain you're not a bad person nothing is wrong with you something happened to you and we have to do truva is returning to the part of ourselves which is the core of ourselves not falling prey to the protectors to the Clippers which created a new version of ourselves have compassion for them see what they're trying to do breathe them out notice them don't let them control notice them don't be in a battle but identify with your with your essence foreign [Music] blah blah Baba bye bye bye bye yeah [Music] hi hey foreign [Music] how I am [Music] oh yeah [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] I'm mama hey if I'm bye bye bye Mama today [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] pleasant surprise [Music] what happened to the side your name is [Music] you know [Music] another day [Music] this weekend [Music] your name is [Music] your name is [Music] [Applause] and God never mind [Music] [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] oh yeah [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] yeah yeah yeah [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you foreign [Music] literally it means you should renew our days like to cut them like in the days of old like in the old days but there's a deeper interpretation is the academy in each person renew our days to be able to come to that space of kedem that space that precedes all of the distractions and all of the concealments to be able to come back to your pristine pristine Core US foreign [Music] Hearts desires are fulfilled materially and spiritually but the Claudius revealed and manifested goodness for you for your loved ones for all of our brothers and sisters and now it is strong in the whole world it should be a year of true [Music] breakthrough all of the obstructions thank you