Giving Hashem Your Inner Self | Rabbi Yisroel Besser

We're living through terrifying times. It's not a secret. And everybody is looking for a zechus, a source of merit for themselves and for all of Klal Yisroel. Everybody wants to do something big. The pasuk tells us about times like this, My nation, go into your rooms, lock the doors the Navi says. Wait there for a moment, until the Ribono shel Olam’s wrath, the anger passes by. What does that mean, ‘Go into your rooms’, ‘Lock your rooms’? Locking our rooms is going to help or not help? The Ribono shel Olam’s wrath is a missile attack and you need a sealed room? Of course, that's not what it means. I heard from my Rebbe that בחדריך means, when it says, ‘your rooms’ it means, You go into someone's house and it looks very nice, and everything's very clean and everything is perfect, but you go into their bedroom, that's a private spot, it doesn't always look the same as the rest of the house. It's more intimate, it's more private, it's more a reflection of the real person. The rest of the house is what you show other people and the room, where you close the door, that's you, that's your private place. Every single person has their room, has their private spot, in Avoda, in Ruchnius, the place that’s really them. I once had the opportunity, I was at an Agudah convention and there was a speech for therapists by a therapist. And I'm not a therapist and I wasn't meant to be there. But I walked into the wrong room. And I left, but not right away. I stayed just for a little bit, to hear a little bit of what he was saying, even though I shouldn't have been there. The therapist was speaking, it was just after COVID, and he was saying that he dealt with a couple and the husband decided, they were going through a rough time, COVID was challenging, it was stressful, they were newly married, and he was extremely stoic and courageous and tough. He said: I have to put up a tough face for my wife. I told her: It's okay, nothing's wrong. We're going to be okay, be strong. And he said: My marriage was terrible. We went through a very, very, very bad time. One day, the husband couldn't deal with all the pressure, everything he was keeping inside, and he burst into tears. He was just very scared. And his wife lit up. She was like: That's the person. Thank you, that's who I married. Their marriage got much better after he cried. The things that he had been holding back from his wife, thinking that that's going to hurt, it was really what she was waiting for. She wanted to see him. The stoicism and the courage were very nice, but it wasn't him. And the tears were him. So this therapist was saying, In order to be successful in a marriage, a person has to let the spouse see themselves, even their vulnerabilities. בחדריך means the place that's really us. We do a lot of things. You walk out of Shul in the morning, you say Tehillim, and you say Acheinu with Kavanah and everybody does. And you send money to Eretz Yisroel, and you send Tzitzis, and whatever you're doing is all holy. But a lot of times we're just doing it. We're not really putting ourselves into it, because we're distracted, because so much is going on. Everybody's got to find that place that only they know about and give that to the Ribono shel Olam. No one knows what goes on in another person's mind and heart, and Shemiras Einayim, watching one's eyes, is the ultimate battle scar that one takes to the Ribono shel Olam, that nobody else knows. It's personal, but it's so real, it's so genuine, it's so authentic. It's חדריך, it’s one of the closed rooms of a person that only the Ribono shel Olam sees. Hang out there a little bit, hang out in that area where you create zchusim that way עד יעבור זעם, and that will push away the anger.