Yanky Flusberg: My wife drives me crazy

My wife drives me crazy, you guys so crazy she gave me a list of stuff to do tonight number one: I have to ask how everyone is doing tonight good? ok, I asked how everybody is doing my wife drives me crazy she says to me, Yanky, I want you to go to the store and I want you to get me three cases of Coke and if they have plums get me four so I got her four cases of Coke but, the stuff that my wife... the stuff that my wife comes up with these ideas that she comes up with just last week, my daughter turned one and my wife said all my friends are doing this shtick I want to do it. It's called a cake smash anybody here ever heard of cake smash? I said, cake smash? What exactly is that? she said, oh, well you go out and you buy the cake I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna buy the cake. Money money money by the way, I have a question does anybody know why when you have two men and a woman sitting together at a meal why can't we count the woman for mezuman? anybody know why? because as much mezuman you give them, it's never enough so I said cake smash? Yeah, you go out and buy the cake and what we do is we get the baby naked nothing but a diaper we give the baby the cake and we let the baby go to town with the cake yeah? oh, and then we take pictures and we post them on social media and we post it to all our friends, and it goes all over the place I would rather have stolen those cases of Coke so my son comes over to me and my son says, Abba, what is marriage like? so I said don't talk to me. Leave me alone and when he did that, I asked him why he's ignoring me I recently asked my wife what can I get you for an anniversary present? I want to get you something. What can I get you? she said, nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace so I got her nothing but we're trying to work on our marriage we went to a marriage professional and when I say professional, I mean the rabbi of our shul and the rabbi says Yanky, I'm going to give you 5 minutes to speak and I'm going to give your Rebbetzin 5 minutes to speak but I'm going to let your Rebbetzin go first Rebbetzin, tell me one thing that really really bothers you so my wife says, well all my friends, every Erev Shabbos they get a beautiful bouquet of flowers and each flower is gorgeous and beautiful and my husband doesn't even know which flower I like at that point, I said, excuse me Rov, excuse me I have to interrupt you what does she mean I don't know which flower she likes? every two weeks I go to the store and get her All Purpose!