0:00 / 0:00
Eitan Kalmowitz: Un BT
6,986 views
Follow comedian Eitan Kalmowitz's journey from BT to FFB!
Comments(0)
Transcript
Auto-generated transcript. Not time-synced to the video.
I saw that in some of
the promotional material for this event
I was described as a Baal Teshuva Tzfati Detroiter
and I must say that I completely reject that label
Not the second part. There's nothing I can do about that
The first part
notwithstanding my background
I just don't identify as a BT
now let me be clear
I was a BT
was I ever
I mean, I tchuked out with the best of them
like, initially, nobody taught me how
you're supposed to go to the Mikvah
so I didn't know what counted as a dunk
so I used to climb all the way out up the stairs
and go all the way back in for the dunk
I also did the thing that every BT does
you guys know what I'm talking about?
Ok, so I'm going to let you FFBs in on a little secret
just between us
every single Baal Teshuvah
without exception, every single one
at some point believes
that maybe, maybe, possibly
they just might be Moshiach
come on, I know there are other BTs here
and you know that you did it
don't even try to pretend
you didn't announce it to the whole world
but you thought about it
and you started preparing
you practiced blowing shofar
although I have to admit
that I always found the whole
Gog Umagog thing very concerning
so you could imagine my relief
when I started hanging out with Chabad
and I found out that the Rebbe is Moshiach
I mean, what a burden off my shoulders
not to mention the fact
that it's a heck of a lot easier
to hide a Moshiach flag
in your room at your parents house
than it is a white donkey
let me tell you
I know from experience
now, little did I know at the time
that in certain Chabad Houses you're actually
more welcome if you say you're Moshiach
but that's another discussion
But I had one thing going for me
and that's that I was still very young
when I got involved in all of this
so I decided, I'm going to learn to do things like the pros
I'm going to become un-BT
you know how people make baby books
for their kids
and they record all their kids' milestones?
like his first word
his first step, and that kind of thing
I did the same thing with my journey
to being a regular FFB Lubavitcher
I have in there my first time talking in Tefillin
my first time Davening after Chatzos
my first time saying Mezonos on an entire pie of pizza
my first time speaking Loshon Hara
that was a really special one
and before you knew it
by my second year in Yeshiva
I was already pretty normal
I started sleeping on the bottom bunk
and I learned the proper way to Toivel in the Mikva
which of course is, you dunk your head under
and then aggressively karate chop the water
as many times as you can