DAVID NEW YORK: Learning About Punishments Made Me Love God RTH PODCAST #16

welcome to the returning to hasem podcast today's episode is David and route to becoming a lawyer raised traditionally with no Torah no Shabbat and keeping the very basic minimum requirements in Judaism when David finds Rabbi ruin he understood the severity of what he was doing and decides to make a change we're very excited to host him today and to hear what his story entails so without further Ado let's get into it [Music] so today we have David David thank you very much for taking the time and joining us today on this uh podcast thank you for having me big big honor thank you David if you don't mind can you tell us a little more about yourself about your story what was uh you know life's like before chuba and uh just a little more about yourself and yeah yeah of course um so I'm 27 today um I started I guess coming back you know to observance a little bit more being a little bit more better when I was about 19 years old 18 19 years old 18 was a little bit where was a starting point um and then not so much but building up and then little by little little by little I started to grow I grew up very you know I had a a Yeshiva education um you know from prean all the way that's what I thank my mom for uh but growing up we didn't really have you know uh Torah we were uh Shabbat dinners were really just you know we said kidou TV was on you know it was very traditional there wasn't really understanding behind it and I think that's because my parents migrated from Russia um they didn't have this upbringing they really just had Traditions they didn't really have like laws to follow it was just like oh PES off's here you don't eat bread mat Shabbat Brit but the like bare bare minimum just getting by you know driving to like my grandparents and Shabbat um for you know lunch and then you know coming home watching TV you know the basic stuff and uh all through high school you know I went to like I said I went to YH but I went to a public school Yo which is basically it's it's um in the morning session we had separate uh boys and girls and then um afternoon session which was all the secular studies everything was mixed um no dress code you know meaning like you couldn't come in like shorts and stuff but there was like a you didn't have to wear like black pants and a white shirt you know so it was a very calm chill environment um and I think actually that school for who I am today really because the re there they really really know how to connect and and talk to you on your level based of your religious observance level and you know familywise just it was incredible experience but you know you're 16 15 16 you don't want to keep Shabbat you don't you want you want to go out Friday nights you want to meet you know up with girls and and chill and you know go to parties and whatnot um it's it's a very big tala it is and um I think that if you don't have that in the beginning of stages of life like you know when you start I don't know like 5 six years old with a child start to understand aail Bar Mitzvah where he starts to being in Judaism those teen years are very difficult to to be religious or you know to do this because you're a teenager you know you're you just want to enjoy life you're not an adult yet but you're not a kid anymore you're kind of in that stage where you want to have fun you want to enjoy you know and um I think a big big turning point for me personally was um one of my friends he actually is a rup today which is funny and looking back at pictures we look at our was with like skin Fades you know he had an earring at one point this is going back you know we like 15 and then we're looking how much we've grown today he actually this is I again just thinking back um I remember I was on my it was my 18th birthday and I went to a club um before this is right before I started doing the show like this I think was like the thing that like opened my brain and he texted me and I was already there he's like yo what are you doing today like do you want to go learning now because I love and until today I love and respect him so much I didn't want to tell him where I was because he was he grew like like senior year he like changed and like went 180 in in observance for his own reason but he never mixed that with who we were you know his other friends his who weren't there yet and he was and he still is today but I'm saying then he was so respectful to understand where I'm coming from cuz he was there that he didn't judge me so I remember he text he texts me and he's like do you want to go learning and I'm like I don't know how to tell him like where I am you know he's like you know he looks like you today sunny you know meaning back then he had already he grew out he started working but he was he got really into it senior year and I like you know I'm I'm in a and I I couldn't I couldn't even say it so I texted him I can't I'm out for my birthday in a club and the line that he sent me stuck in my brain like till this day he says okay just don't stay too long and like that in my again it was again justifying what he said 100% not supposed to be there against the th 100% but it was the fact of the connection that okay tack you right now get you really off the D or I can acknowledge what you're doing and try to help you chipping away and helping you through the shoe which is what he does even today and I speak to him today about my own personal issues and he's been guiding me you know he I'm older than him I'm six months older than him and I look up to him like my older brother um and that right there was just something that's stuck in R because I asked him like a few days later I said you would never step foot in here right now based off what you are why did you text me that like don't stay too long like you know where was the rebuke you know what I'm saying like what are you doing you shouldn't be doing this yeah I was expecting that I was expecting no no text message you know like no reply and he and he told me he's like straight up he's like like I I I know the light you were not there yet to come out but I'm going to try to get you out and like that from like that point on we started keep like well again I say we turn around overnight but it started to build like on Shabbat he would write me over now I live about a mile and a half away from him so I used to take the bus to him because like I'm not I wasn't going to walk a mile and a half in the summer it's too long you know so it's like it's about like a 40-minute walk right like more or less again you're lazy now I do it like I walk a mile and a half to Sho you know it is what it is but but I'm saying then at 18 years old you're like n you're not doing that so I would take the bus so then um actually what happened was this is how I started keeping Shabbat which is like incredible because I give this um person which I'm going to you know speak about right now the credit so when I was in high school I was you know uh hanging out my friends and stuff like that and there was a girl that I really like put it that way and when again I was going to go to I was going to uh Shabbat like you know his house it's his cousin right this guy that I'm speaking about it's his cousin and um basically she tells me once you know David like why don't you keep Shabad like we were just talking right so I'm like I don't know whatever like I'm I live in you know away from all my friends all my friends live in that area like I live in Queens right so I live in Main Street they all live than Forest Stills so no one's around me I'm bored my sister doesn't keep my dad doesn't keep my mom's at work it's like I ain't got nobody around me you know it's It's just tough whatever so that's why I take the bus or I walk I'm on my phone so she's like she tells me like straight up and open my mind really she's like go on the phone when you're here with us meaning the friends we all get together and that guy's house and basically like you know we would talk play cards getting the time to go by and the best way to keep Shabbat you know what okay she's right now I was doing it from a standpoint which I'll be very honest like persuade her like to to like me as well so that we could have a relationship you know cuz again you're 18 and so on but deeper more it was like I don't need the phone why why do I need the phone you know okay the walking fine is is a little far but the phone and then thear comes to me and says what happens if there's an emergency on the bus or what happens if there's an emergency on the road okay no one's going to die like you know and I told myself you're right now my motive was to show her that yeah I'm so Shabbat you know I want to sway you you know again we're guys we're the hunters right as they say so I said you're right I didn't bring my phone but I took the pass until she like and with the friends we just start like why don't you just walk you know it's also like healthy whatever blah so little by little I started to walk now to go to sh forget about it that was not happening I'm not sitting a three hour M it's not happening like that's that's out of the question maybe maybe I would go pray maybe you know if we go to like a fast minion because again you have so much kha can't go through you know what I'm saying you build up all of these you know from your sins you don't really realize it when you're 17 18 years old but that's what it is right like why why when you go talk to a 17y old he doesn't want to hear you he's like I don't want to hear I don't want to hear it's because he's got all these blockages around him can't hear it his his is like just screaming to go to Kusha but got all these covers covers covers very hard to get the light through that was me and you know little by little it U cleansed that's what I said and I realized like best day of the week like literally the best day of the week I get no phone no computer no TV it's m Freedom like freedom and then I start listening to your own learning more and more about you know just the Ser the severity of sins you know and you don't really realize it because in Yesa they don't really talk about this stuff you know they teach you you know but they don't really teach you like well why don't we do these things you know like God said okay you can't break Shabbat but like what's the point like okay I I break it but now what like lightning roded strikes me down you know and stuff it's like what's the punishment I think that's the problem that they don't really make you understand the consequence of your actions and I think that's what Isa don't do they kind of just want you to be in VA and again I'm talking because I went to Yeshiva all of my life so I remember like from pre 1A till 12th grade Yeshiva you know and they don't teach you these things they they kind of make like what I hated the most like the most if you were caught talking to a girl like alone they made such a big deal out of get where you're coming from 100% uh what reasons you know you can't talk I get all that a guy who's 15 16 years old like no offense I'm not a homophobe I'm going to talk to women right like meaning right but we don't understand it then again now today at 27 years old I understand it but there's got to be that approach I think it's very important going back to the point of my friend the approach is very important that zahar wall I'm sure everyone knows who he is says it how his um his his rabi at six when he was 16 years old his Rabbi called him a sewer rat he says this on one of his videos why because he was talking to a girl and he's like you're he's like you know who talks to girls like sewer rat and he called him that hat that Rabbi whoever that was thinking Rabbi a har Wallin in shamim today because had is a w went off to Derek because as he says he broke down he was crying he's like I was the type of person who would who used to like fight he was on the hockey team he was a very strong you know character he's like nothing could break me but those words just dryed me on the inside and it's like you know that approach is like very wrong you know it's not at least in our generation you could really break somebody and that being said just going back to you know my story that those little key points of speaking and really connecting and getting them away from the is the right approach and one of the things I remember and you know it's funny like just thinking about it right now I have no idea how I how I got into um Rabon ruin like like no idea like I was think like today I was driving like start like what what was that video and you know you're trying to like think in the back of the file of your and I'm like I can't think like what was it and I think I think it had to do something and again I may be wrong but I think it had to do something that he had a um a video about spilling seed he speaks very much about that extensively um and I I don't again I don't I don't I can't recall like to this day I don't even know how long ago it was you know so I'm going off on a tangent I'm sorry if you have any more questions stop me please I apologize well I mean David honestly I really really felt like I was just watching a movie for the past 10 minutes you know I hope so hope list we're trying you know whole goal the whole the whole purpose why the one texted me I was like yes I want to do this because need the gift of Gap I could speak my wife tells me this like you can walk into a room Nobody by the end of the night you'll know 15 people like I said they're your friends you know and I do that because I have The Gift of Gab and I want to use that for Torah I want to use that to help you know youngsters you know and one of the things that like for my profession is you need to know how to talk you need to know how to you know get into situ situations come out of situations and you know really be quick on your feet and especially today in our generation it's so easy to be influenced you know like by just people are just like like boats they just wherever they go they go there's no real standing like why am I doing certain things why you know even non like religious people like I have certain family members who are non religious and I look at them and I feel so sorry because I'm like you're just living life you wake up you brush your teeth you go to work you come home you go to sleep the end and that's your life it's like I know hamster on the wheel over and over there's no newness there you're you know they say we're the ones who are restricted the the religious you know are restricted in reality you guys are the restricted ones cuz you're so confined in your little world can't break free like you feel like no no no this is it you know money women fun excursions there's no end you know and one of the things that's really funny is a family member came to me maybe a month and a half ago two months ago um and and asked me they're like you know you know you got me married so young you got I got married BR at 22 thank God I found a woman a must Taylor Made For Me Taylor Made You know I Taylor Made that's all I got to say God did his job on that let's put it that way she is amazing I love respect my wife a lot and one of the things that that she always you know like they people ask like you got married so young you're married 22 you know you where are your years you know you could have chilled you know you could had fun and I said I'm so happy that I was not observant at 15 14 you know 16 because truthfully I had a fake ID at 16 years old because I looked I looked old I had a beard already I had like this whole thing going on I looked like an adult I looked over 21 um I you know I'm tall I'm sitting but I'm like 61 so like I didn't look at 16 I looked close to 2021 like the P I like that fake ID so all of the that people do in their 20s not but not to do it but I did it then had the which is very important because I don't want people to think that oh see he did and no no you have to have a marit better not to do it but you have to have a merit and I had a merit I don't know why to do T and and wake up and realize like that's not a life you want to live because even living in that life it was like you would go to a party and then it's like oh it was over there was no real satisfaction non-observant you have no real satisfaction people don't understand that they think they do they have their money and their cars and everything but really they're lacking and you could see like I today I see it you know like I know a person who goes on a vacation no not exaggerating three to four times a year she has to go on a vacation a family member and I tell myself like why how stressed could you possibly be that you need to go three four times a year and not a week you know oh it's on my bucket list or oh I want to explore oh and and I say okay but come back and it's like you know but like me when I look at myself and I'm like you know I achieved like waking up you know let's say if I set a goal I want to learn 15 minutes today and I achieve that and then I say wait but I do that for seven days straight I'm like wow that's real satisfaction why cuz what's what's the thing what's your soul your I mean what's your essence is your soul right so where does the soul come from comes from Hashem when you're not in your soul state right you're not connected to the source which is Hashem so therefore you try to find all the outlets on everywhere else but then you're realizing why am I anxious why am I depressed why because you're missing the key element you're missing gem like you need God like what do you mean it's like the D he's your fuel he's everything cuz he instilled right what does it say that adish was given the breath from he blew on him where do we learn from that that this is the connection I have godliness in me you know I have I have a piece of hasem so when I'm not connecting to him I'm obviously feeling a lack because it's like you get what I'm saying it's not the final piece is missing you know you have a whole beautiful picture but then there like one piece in the middle it just kills you know imagine amona Lisa missing an eye got you know what I'm saying it's like no no longer Theona Lisa you know what I'm saying she's just a woman and I think that's what people need to understand that connecting to Hashem is not a problem it's the biggest blessing it's like like right now I'm talking I'm getting like a high talking about this like literally maybe it's just I don't know okay so so so hold on let's back track for a second you were would you say that you were uh like born and and raised religious from from birth no okay absolutely not far from from from birth so I said my my father's um my mom wanted to send us to public school like 100% she's like I don't need to pay this tuition whatever but my as respect to her husband she basically you know was like okay we'll send them to Yeshua because my dad again for whatever reason they didn't grow up observing but they had this understanding like I I have to send him to Yeshiva so I went to Yeshiva but at home it was you know we we I I mean I'm assuming we had kosher meet I don't know but my mom never mixed with the dishes I didn't even know what mix with the dishes was till I got married I had no clue that was a thing my wife taught me that and I was like what are you doing like why and I'm like this is so what do you mean my mom never did this I we had to do this I was like what is this you know what you know I had no clue um then uh uh you know like shabbats we shabbats holidays like we never eat like bread on Passover type you know like that we never did but you know matah but like I said very just just Traditions whatever we had to do we ate matah and Paso were great um you know we had the four cups of wine I don't think we ever got to Hollow in PES off ever until I became observant like then like after on you have the you drink the third cup and then right away you went to the fourth cup like I remember this and I'm like wait when I was a kid there was I mean we went so much faster there was a little more reading you know and then the the the last part with the you know you get what I'm saying it was just like just to do it and I mean you could relate everyone you know uh we all did the so it's like you never had that and then um for like yur you know like Roso um I don't know if we were if we like watch TV but like yur was always in synagogue like that's you yur juk you know that's just I we knew it as um what else um you know I think that was the year you know we went on vacations and stuff like that like to um what is it the Caribbean islands but never like from yeah no no from from birth so they raised you in a way where it was kind of you know 5050 okay I think a lot of us can relate to that kind of upbring and then your friend now obviously has has a big influence uh on on your life and that that obviously stuck like you said whatever you said and uh not you of I'm sorry he was there for me when I was 18 so I didn't get to talk about this part I wanted to kind of start off with him why because he was my guide really um when I was 18 my parents divorced and my sister took that very like not well and she's older but she basically like secluded herself from my dad and like she had she was with my mom mostly and I was kind of like that being pulled on both sides trying to be you know respectful to my mom and respectful to my dad and whatever it was it was a very very big war I I was stressing a lot I that's when I started smoking marijuana you know like relax and he was there guiding and telling me like you know speak to Hashem try to connect you know there's something deeper here you know and my spirit guide is what you want to call him you know and I'm just paraphrasing of what happened personally in my personal life but at 18 years old it was not good you know I gained tremendous weight from from smoking and then you have you eat late um I was not in a good place mentally until to the point where I told both my parents I'm done like I can't do this anymore my my my my uh I us still like have um not heart problems but like I would feel it like just I wasn't well I wasn't you know I I palpitation I don't know what it was but it wasn't good like I felt it in my chest like this is not is not what an 18-year-old is supposed to feel like you know 18y to feel like a b I'm sorry like every you know he's going to feel like he's got the but like I wasn't I was not good and then when I basically told them both respectfully you got to go deal with your own stuff I can't be involved in this anymore I was uh 19 and then uh this like a whole year it was it was it was brutal and maybe like six months into my 19th year um when I was n like whatever 19 and a half I started like just something clicked through my brain like I'm not healthy I need to start to change I stopped smoking I like M really really wanted to like C healthy cuz I just I wasn't good I went to get a blood work for college when I was transferring College um I had to get a u you know whatever for your documents and my doctor was like I'm just saying I'm just I'm not going to say what I had but she's like you're not doing well you need to change right now you know like it's a problem so with her we you know worked out our meal plans with her like I spoke with nutritionist and everything flimed down tremendously thank God after a year and a half met my wife you know just fast forwarding my wife about a year later and that at that time I think why I met my wife really was um I had a problem with as every 18-year-old does with pig breit and all this stuff that I started like really really like holding on like guarding myself and I think that Ron was the reasoning that I watched something of his where I understood the severity of what I am doing and I have to stop and realizing that you got to like hone in because you're losing you're going to your zuk you know is being messed up about it um and it's a very big problem because you don't you know you what I'm saying you don't want to throw away your BR the you know the seed is all your BR the foundation and little by little like growing building building you know till who I am today having a filter on my phone my computer everything is filtered um really understanding that you know that's really the foundation and by how do I say like those tribulations forced to get into hasem you know it it really like because you have nobody else like nobody else gives you answers they don't know why your parents are divorced they don't know why you're doing this they don't know why so you're only force is really just to scream to Hashem you're going to turn to God through inspiration or desperation which is 100% true you're either going to be inspired by something and you're going to change or you're going to be desperate because of just life because Hashem says I'm going to wake you up one way or the other I don't want to do it through pain I want to do it through love but I have to wake you up you know and I had to get waken up a little bit through pain um and I'm happy because I was able to wake up at a young age and not suffer with with you know being chasing just being a hamster and a wheel and what inspired you to change where is this now you know transition what happened what inspired me to change I think just realizing that over time again this month you know of of this pressure that I was going through a pressure cooker you don't have a Shem in your life seriously if you don't have a Shem in your life um if you don't connect you will never feel satisfied and I think um I think it has to do a lot with a gift that I was given you know everyone's given a gift the biggest part that when you realize that your actions have come consequences you start to realize I'm sinning and I'm going to have to pay for this one day right I'm having a bill I'm racking up a bill so do I really really really want a Big Bill when I go up to Shayan at 120 or do I want a small Bill everyone's going to have a bill how big do you want that bill so I realized I don't want a Big Bill you know I want to try to do as best as I can to it's aspired to have no bill but realistically everyone sends in some form of a level my goal in life and again as it started being more observa is what is the f Foundation of Judaism so what i realiz is Shabbat you know guarding your eyes guarding your brid Kash you know to fill in the foundation what are my Foundation I got to master my Foundation I got to make sure that I'm learning the laws of Shabbat I have to make sure I know the laws of putting on theing I didn't even know that the ud that's that's on the theill has to touch theill like I thought you know oh it's just there you just I didn't know like learning right because I always look at I I again this is also when I was becoming more observant I looked at things very IAL I think it's the lawyer in me why am I doing this why am I keeping Shabbat why am I doing this like what was this God have nothing else better right like yeah this famous God have nothing else better to do why do I need to keep why do I need to and then you start realizing it's he's not doing this because he hates he's doing this because he loves but but you have to you have to just take a step back and understand what is Shabbat what is to fill it what is guarding your eyes what is all you know the old reason and I think this is what just came to mind what's the purpose of guarding your ey it's really in my opinion again I might be wrong it's not to compare why because you're going to see a woman who's M beautiful and then you're going to look at your wife now your wife had five kids she's no longer that beautiful woman as what she was when she was 20 right but she's beautiful in your eyes why because you grew within those five kids does that make sense the physicality is not there you're going to look at a woman who had five kids and a woman who's 20 years old the physicality no one's going to tell me oh my wife is beautiful and she was 20 no it's a lie that's the lie that's the lie part that's the Lie Part what's the truth part is that no she is beautiful in your eyes cuz you will always look at her like she's that 20-year-old woman but I'm talking about if a guy starts looking at those women and he starts seeing like now again we all fall I'm not saying I'm an angel my eyes are no We All Fall it's do you fall because it was there you know again you just you you happen to it came to your path you know you live in America it's just what it is or did you look for it that's the key difference did you go on on Instagram and look for those women you know and scroll no seriously I don't have Instagram I haven't had it I haven't had it I think since I met my wife which was 7 years ago Orem I pray I seriously pray that I that like today everyone tells me you need Instagram for business and that I pray that I make so much money that I could hire somebody for it because I don't want it because I know my T I will go and look because I I was there I used to look at these things and it and it's not right because number one now I have a wife and it's a big problem now again you have like this is just a a number one thing if you don't have a filter on your phone today you are looking at things you're not supposed to period I don't care if you're the biggest I cannot go on my wife's phone because I'm too afraid now this is people are going to laugh at me and say yo he can't hold himself no no no my friend you can't hold yourself you know why because I am not putting myself in that position to fail I'm not it's like it's like faking an alcoholic and putting him in a bar and for a party like a think and tell he's not gonna drink he's got a thousand different Liquors that he could possibly try and he's gonna sit there like a no no he's gonna take a drink because that's what He Is We Men that's what we are if you don't filter yourself if you don't guard yourself you're gonna go and look that's just what it is I don't care and you know what it is people will laugh like I remember I was in SCH and one of the guys he actually uh I I wanted to go show there was a person who passed away there's this group on Facebook that us bharian have and it was like a young boy that passed away so I I asked I wanted to see the photo cuz I couldn't log in I don't I can't log into my Facebook I have it filtered so that I then I don't even use it I like 20 friends that that it's just like a waste it's just there just have my face on it uh if you want to search me up but um I asked him and then he goes to me he's like yo can you um like go on your phone like you don't have Facebook you know like to go on your own phone and I said no it's blocked and he's like what do you mean it's block and I'm like oh I have a filter and he's like oh you have a filter and he's like you know I was actually looking for a filter bam got him on the filter now I'm not saying this to be paid for a year I paid with my own cuz you couldn't afford this kid like 16 17 years old couldn't afford it I said dude it's like a 100 bucks for the year I got you I'll cover it for the year next year try to do it yourself you know and I got one you know so like that's the fourth step of TBA I mean we were discussing it earlier Sunny so but we'll get into it a little later I guess by the way just side note uh Sunny just a side note I don't know how you would just sit there calm like that listening to people talk you're incredible you're in first of all I'm not a New Yorker so I know you probably have but um are where you from it's interesting um I was born and raised in California wow yeah so you're very calm cool yeah at the end of the day it's not here for me it's it's here to for you and to help other people I'm just I'm just the middle Mar so your story is so far very interesting it's very cool um I'm sure you have a lot more to talk about but I want to get into the more um meat and potatoes if you will no problem um let's talk let's talk about the interaction with you and Rabbi ruen and the organization can you tell me a little more about that and and what like happened there how how did Rabbi Ruben help you did he help you in any way did you get in contact with just speak to him what happened there I've been in so I've started like again I can't go I can't think back of how long I started listen but I remember there was a point in my life where I listened to a probably one lecture per day which is like the three hour lectures I want I listen to it per day um I remember from just he has on um on YouTube playlist I think it's the beton series I watch uh and garaban series I watched the whole thing stomped the around by but maybe like 80 episodes which is you know still a lot um which is great by the way how these you know it was great and um I I I don't really remember when I started but the change the impact he had in my life was just phenomenal why he speaks from it from a point where nobody really talks about right like number one is you will get punished for your you need to understand there's a Wen upon and people need to know that it can always just be sugarcoating cannot and one of the thing the rabbi is very very passionate about is people understanding that it's not all sunshine and rainbow you will get punished for sins that you do and I think once a person really starts to understand that that has that that in itself is the impact that there's consequences to my action and me being as like I said before always thinking like what are my cons not knowing the consequence is one thing right because it's Torah wise you kind of have to like learn it once you learn it you're like whoa how did Rabbi ruin you know impact your life how how did he you know did he help you change the organization what was it that kind of helped you make that transition to N I think the the lectures are very detailed and I love the fact that he always gives Source you know very very important he always says that you have to give a source of what you're talking get your St out of your out of your own knowledge of your own opinion and and listening through you know those lectures and hearing you know everything you start to realize like your your life your actions have consequence and if you don't change you may never very big problem or it may be too late and you don't want it to be too late if Hashem sending you a message through whoever it could be raoni your local friend whatever it is you have to understand that hem is sending you a message right because that's your free choice and I think for me whatever your own his lectures his knowledge it wasn't it again this guy was a w knows how to talk he's a typical New Yorker knows how to connect in a sense to people who are like me before doing the out because of the story and when I started to listen more and more I realized like yo I got to wake up and smell the cough you know like my actions have serious consequences not keeping Shabad not keeping kashu things have a very big problem and when you say how have an impact in my life I'll tell you like this you ready during covid um I just had my second kid bro during Co and and yeah he's think God he's three years old now but during and and I needed a job okay like I needed to work so I got a job at this bookstore Jewish bookstore Ben Israel books shout out and one of the things that they do is they we sell um transliterated text so Hebrew to English transliterated or translated and one of the things that I asked her and we used to ship stuff a lot right people would buy stuff one of the things I remember I asked her road is can you please send me a bunch of CDs and I used to put those CDs and I asked the r because we would give like free bees free stuff free little like one card pamphlets like blessing of the children like as generosity gift to our client and I asked permission can I put you know own's room he's like yeah no problem go do what you got to do and I remember somebody called me they well they didn't call me they sent an email to the Ben Israel and I I was the one who was in charge of everything so I was reading it and she takes this woman takes a picture of everything spread out and she snaps a PO voter like I'm so blessed thank you so much for the amazing extra gift aside from her order she ordered like one to two items which is nothing great 10 15 most and she's like thank thank you so much I can't wait to watch this movie and this is the movie that R [Music] made to buying opportun the bottom line is is that uh these two companies have a huge opportunity there are only two companies in an entire [Music] sector my story doesn't start with religion my story doesn't start with the truth my story starts with Alma desika the world of Lies God gave God took may his name be [Music] blessed and I'm like whoa like that's pretty big you know because I don't know what that's goingon to do and I'm happy because I was able to send that out and the impact that I think he made on me was to help other was that you have to wake up you have to understand that your actions have consequences you don't do you're going to get handle for it's a very big problem we don't want to scare not doing the I want them to understand that theba is a process it's not an overnight thing and it's about making your life better not making your life restricted it's not about thinking the G the no no no it's about how do I become better for what reason connect to my Creator period I want to connect to every sing single day you live it's about how do I connect to my Creator and that's what I started to realize and I think that's what raon did for me what he said that he was doing the tikuna R movie I tried to get money left and right for this to donate like literally because I was like so like really trying to work on myself about it scary like I watched I mean the ganol movie was out of this world I'm not going to lie that was very hard to watch very scary but I was already in it so I already knew a lot meaning I had it very graphic so I'd always sticks but you need that you need that you need that into your brain because if you don't have that why why would you change and the impact that he had on me personally was understand you going to accumulate debt and it's a problem you need to start cleansing those debts paying them pay you know as it say paying the bill how through self-sacrifice self-sacrifice could be starting to wake up in person just prays you know cuz I used to do that I never went to I would come wake up done so I started going to I would never even read H like starting from hodu never I would go I think was like bar Shamar and on and then leave right after um think it was like right after Anna just say aleno even if that I haven't said aleno leap but now sitting now spending at least 20 minutes after to learn a little bit but again it's a process it happened overnight and I think that impact was that one of the things I I I don't remember but again this is like bits of what from the lectures that I learned is that he says it's not about the change overnight no one's changing overnight it's the fact that you want to change and you're working towards that goal and that's the biggest importance about Judaism Judaism is not about changing your whole life over overnight you're not doing that it's about number one what are your foundations that you need to work on mastering those foundations and tweaking those other things those little uh mitv and stuff that people don't really you know think is a problem but you got to have your foundations you have to know why you're doing it and for me he built that foundation around I'm not going to lie he really made me understand dude wake up like you need to wake up because if you don't it's going to be a problem and if you don't wake up now and I think again I had to be cuz I I was 20 my wife had to be around that time when I started listening to him it had to um so I remember I was very like you know like going hard at this like really CU I had a goal I wanted to get married already I was like 20 years old I thought I was on the top of the world like yeah I gotta get married I'm doing sh I'm a rabbi already you know so little by little it's just what it is you get on the spiritual highight it's like a rocket it just shoots up because you want to connect you know what I think and it's funny just keep I think it's your Nisha trying to pierce the C that's how I think it is but you know then you try to like clean the layers and I'll say if he's going to watch this thank you so much R you are incredible I text him every so often we text um you know I sent him a message I tell him I don't know how you don't sleep because he messages to me at like two in the morning 3 in the morning and I'm like you don't sleep like you know what I'm saying and he's a soldier I give him that all his health issues should go to the haters of Israel that m is a true Ed soldier in this world like there's no question about it it may be harsh at times but you know what medicine ain't ain't a is always bitter ain't no sweet medicine and even the ones that they say that tastes good tastes like garbage um I just want to say is to the r you had an incredible impact in my life you're still due to today I still donate today to batem the organization I tell people you want to know where to donate your money the place where it's going to pay you the most dividend andat is one of those organiz I'm not saying that I'm not getting paid for that I'm telling you if you want to I remember at one point I had a goal that I really like wanted to donate like in the thousands and I wasn't like working what and I remember when the rabis sent me a the tax return sheet like in the end and I'm like I don't really need it I don't even know how this works like you know I was young I was like 21 22 I didn't understand how this stuff worked so and I saw the amount and I'm like I donated all of that you know again through the year because you would give ever so often right like and you don't realize it that it builds up through a year it builds up you know $50 a year I was there 25 and my me goal is I think he still has it is for like $266,000 you could sponsor a series I think right if I'm not mistaken or something like that that's my next goal is I wanted for my family for for the success of my children to be is uh to to sponsor a a series about a good one like something you know like people want to hear about be about money I don't know something stop chasing money so much just to say about the inag words can't describe the impact seriously they can't it's incredible it's very incredible his is you guys all the team behind him lash the team like Sunny you're one of them I don't know how you guys do it you guys are angels and the stuff like ju when I first saw the movie I was like Wow and that is not easy to make that a lot of hours and a lot of editing and a lot of back and forth and the headaches and this we got to thank you guys you guys are like he's he's I would say on the you know the face you know like C See's the one who speaks but people don't really understand the stuff that goes behind the scenes like right now we have three technical difficulties you know I can only imagine what difficulties you guys go through in making these you know events movies books you know shipping stuff like you guys are real Soldier continue doing what you're doing I know we're way past our time what I want to say is thank you so much to all of you thank you for the opportunity to speak thank you to Hashem for letting me do the shua and anyone who's listening to this if I can do it you can do it too I promise just wake up smell the coffee life is great being religious I promise it's just what it is there is no that when you realize that when you really really understand like I I love my life yeah I have difficult everyone has difficulty but you realize like I'm connected I'm I'm I'm the T there's nothing else problems don't go away when become religious guys they don't they don't go away what you have an understanding that Hashem is doing this for me and not to me that is a quote also from gal fer thank you so much Sunny you're incredible I know you're probably going to edit this part out but whatever it is what it is no I say you're you're you're you're an amazing amazing Soul seriously watch hasem bless you like just millions and millions of dividends throwing your way amen amen likewise like I wa this couldn't this couldn't be done without you and people like you willing to take their time I know you having a very important place to go to after thisor and and and the fact no no thank you and we really really appreciate your time and for sure it's going to help bring people closer to Hashem and help them to Cha and uh please send me the link guys post this I want to watch this final I want to see the final thing thank you so much for your time seriously you ief it thank thank you take care take care there a small member in it shouldn't take over your whole life if you satiate it you're never going to have enough the soer clamp when it gets a hold of something it does not let go time for us to rectify what we have done normal number should be somewhere around 20 million or higher you'll never going to have control it if you [Music] start only feed it when it's permissible according to the to pornography is as addictive as crack cooking [Music] you're always going to be happy including this world and the next [Music] a very special thank you to all our amazing guests who show real avati by taking the time out of their busy schedules and sharing their ups and downs with us all for the sake of am May Hashem continue to bless you a thousandfold if you enjoyed this video you can find more of these podcasts on our website at www.iso.org if you're you're on YouTube be sure to subscribe to the channel to hear more highly influencing lectures and stories like the one you heard here today thank you for watching and batm may we all have the Merit to return to Hashem