Bonei Olam Sephardic Division 2023 Dinner - Rabbi Shlomo Farhi Keynote Address

I want to say uh tremendous as we say which means you're always open you always open by thanking and showing appreciation to The Host and you know when you have an event like this in your house it's like a swarm an army comes in they take over your house your backyard your front yard everything swarms and you know it's a beautiful thing when uh when people like yourselves Bobby and Anna you open your home and your hearts just something as beautiful as and so all of you here tonight uh we all are dead of gratitude to to Bobby and Anna and not only that and I want to say you know Joe will tell us in a little while about things that have happened since last year and since two years ago and you know the same question the rabbi ozeri asked about what would have happened if you would have stopped at 74. you know I asked also what would have happened in a year's time from now when the babies will have been born from the money we raised tonight I would ask Bobby and Adam what would have happened if when they asked you to host this event you'd have said no there'll be children out there that literally owe you their lives and every one of us they will owe you their lives by the end of this evening so thank you and Hashem should bless you a thousand fold and anything that you need and anything that you will need for this tremendous tremendous mitzvah my friends I think sometimes a rabbi thinks that when you speak at an event like this you're supposed to say the retora and I kind of feel like if people wanted to hear you speak in a class they'd go to one of your classes I think what a rabbi is supposed to do at an event like this is give the torah's perspective on the evening try and drive home how important it is not just in a physical level but on a spiritual level what it is that we are coming together here tonight to do and I'm going to try if I can to shed a little bit of light to shed maybe to find in our hearts a little bit of space to be able to take in what this means to people I'd like to start with a quote and I'm going to say the quote two times once I'll say it and you'll listen and once I'll say it and you'll take it in it's a quote from Carl Sandburg he said a baby God's opinion that the world should go on let me say that again a baby is God's opinion that the world should go on and I heard this quote and I remember thinking to myself if a baby is God's opinion that the world should go on what is not having a baby the absence of a baby is the absence of the world going on for a person a couple that's waiting for this for grandparents that sit waiting to hear a phone call that go from Doctor to doctor treatment to treatment it's not just that they don't have a kid it's that their entire world is on pause as they become completely obsessed they start becoming ghosts of themselves half lives flitting around the person is at work the girl is at class she's going to exercise but she herself the person you do before she got married she's not here her smile her heart it is absent and I remember thinking to myself when I was thinking this about this quote that the Torah actually says exactly this but I never noticed it before you know yaakov has a wife her name is Leah she has children immediately wonderful but he has another wife and her name is Raquel and Raquel cannot have children and she sees Leia having child after child after child and Rahel walks up to her husband and she says to him and listen to these words he says to her husband give me children and if you can't I will die you read that straightforward you think Rock I was saying she's gonna die but Rahel is saying much more than that if I don't have it I'm not gonna die I am dead the Torah tells us the talmud says it's someone who doesn't have children is compared to someone who's not alive and you don't really get that if you don't experience this but when someone tastes this experience then they know deeply and truly what Rachel said and I must share with you something that I have never I've never shared this before I never understood what Rachel emanu was saying never in my life give me children and if not I'm dead you have a husband you have a family focus on the good be optimistic be positive you know the things that people will tell somebody like that empty words empty platitudes to someone who can't breathe and this woman walked into my office and she said I've been trying and trying and trying and trying and they finally told us that there's no hope at all and she has one question for the rabbi breaks my heart I never share this because it breaks my heart to shifts she asked me Rabbi it's so painful will I go to gehinam will I go to hell rabbi if I take my own life I can't stand it anymore will I be punished if I end in my own life foreign you know the town which says two different expressions one expression is which means a baby is the thigh of its mother another expression in the talmuda a son he is the leg of his father both of those relate to a hip and a leg and our rabbis explain that the concept is you know we're talking about a child is God's opinion that the world should go on children are our future everything we do everything we build towards it's what we live for what does someone who's waiting for that what do they live for I must tell you my friends when you help someone have a child you're not only saving one life you might just be saving three the baby the mother and the father because Nielsen was a ratings company that was very important years ago because there was no other way to rate TV station success and in Nielsen TV ratings the way they would sell appetizing space on their channels was rated specifically around how many people were watching the shows who were between the ages of 18 and 49 that was the key demographic that was worth more than the total viewers number one because 18 to 49s were most likely to buy things but number two because 18 to 49s were going to live a lot longer than 50s to 100s your investment was paying dividends I'm looking around tonight and we have the most important demographic here a demographic who understands who is living in that time you were the demographic that is having children so you understand what it means you understand the importance it's only a few short times ago a year two five ten when you remember what it felt like that first time when they put a baby my friends to this demographic I ask the name of this incredible organization is it builds literally worlds but our rabbis tell us that the word Olam it means two things it means a world also means means something that is hidden something that is a secret you are not only building a world you were building secret you will fix it a secret people have God is great and Hashem always makes sure that the things that you need to have happen happen in exactly the right time I was speaking in so yesterday I went out for dinner and I met a friend one of my oldest friends one of my best friends and I he asked me what are you doing tomorrow I said I'm going to speak at this event and he says oh my gosh that's so amazing and I said why they told me when I first got married nobody knows but we had such trouble finding a way to be able to get pregnant we didn't know where to start we didn't know how to admit it people don't realize that a lot of times is a shame and an embarrassment it shouldn't be but people do suffer and I ask you tonight not only to help financially but if you see someone that's struggling to reach out to them and to let them know that boner alarm exists to hold their hand to bring them to the people sometimes it means giving them a phone number sometimes it means saying I reached out to them already for you and they're waiting for your phone call because sometimes it can be so difficult to ask for the help that we need is that not true so my friends my best friend my oldest friend perhaps I'm my oldest friend but one of my best friends he taught me a secret that in 25 or 30 years I had I never is it the person sitting next to you right now is it your brother and sister is it your daughter or son you might not know but if you give to Borneo lab you will build that secret and you will build that world my friends I found out when I was 35 that I had gout you know how I found that out I was supposed to walk to a speaker at a synagogue and all of a sudden the middle of the night my feet started pounding it was so much pain I couldn't sleep the whole night I tried to walk in the morning I physically could not walk I found that it was gout and Gavin is hereditary I have it in the family but gout is known as the rich man's disease and it's known as the rich man's disease I see you shaking your head because it happens when you have too much meat and too much wine among other things by the way but that's what it's commonly known for what gout is for rich people infertility is far less discerning it doesn't care how much money you or your parents have it doesn't care if you did everything right and you always ate healthy it doesn't care if you exercise 10 times a week it doesn't care how religious you are cruel and it makes no exceptions so if there's this disease striking seemingly randomly in the hearts of people all around us you knew you could do something to stop it wouldn't you well you can you know there are three types of people here tonight and with this I'll end one type is the type who have experienced the suffering I'm talking about and everything I'm saying is not a hadoosh they know it it's theirs I'm describing their life story those people understand they should give generously you know it you have felt it you'd give anything to spare someone else from what you went through the second type of person is a person who is not experienced this event they too should be giving money and support because if God blessed you and spared you from this don't you owe for that help someone else because you were blessed and what do we do with blessing we share and the third group of people is not the people who have had it well the people who haven't had it it's the people who don't know yet the people who just got married the families who have children who just got married and you don't know yet my friends those people also have to line up with their checkbooks ready to help put me on that because if ever there was an insurance policy to ask Hashem that you be amongst the Blessed you'll be amongst the Blessed you'll be amongst those that has this easy path to something that we also desperately want is it not this so I asked the 18 to 49 year olds give with your heart but before Harry asks you for anything can I ask everyone to do something tonight and please forgive me but I'm going to ask you to close your eyes for 10 seconds and all I want you to do with your eyes closed for 10 seconds is to let the faces of your children flesh and your imagination free Floyd to those faces well there's someone out there who's closing their eyes and sees nothing would you not want to share blessing that you have give and give with your hearts get your parents to give and give what their wants enlist your grandparents to give and give with their hearts help the committee that is doing this in the Sephardic Community get the word out volunteer come and be a support and Ally for someone that needs your support and that should bless each and every one of us to be blessed with this and every other blessing all right