CHAZAQ's Torah Talks #85: Lavi Greenspan - Seeing Light in Darkness

[Music] thank you and welcome to Torah talks kazakh's program with special guests tonight and today we have with us uh oblivi Greenspan welcome how you doing thank you for having me of course yeah I pleasure all the Aries the topic is seeing light in darkness and if I believe you can give our uh audience a background of your inspiring so at the end about May time in 1994 they found that I had a tumor right below my brain near my optic nerve the Cushing's disease cushion diseases there's a gland called pituitary gland and when you have a tuber pressing down you have more sugar than you need so my doctor saw my faces out bloated because it's filled with all the water I was drinking because my tongue was very thirsty so I was sent to Mount Sinai Hospital in Manhattan where the Endocrinology stacked Levine or that the Moi and the cats can be taken to find the exact location of the tumor as I told you before it was right below the brain near my optic nerve they told me it was going to be it was a the tumor was lodged and therefore we need two operations one was a nine and a half hour open head surgery another was a six hour operation through the nose I thank Hashem that the operations were successful and I think Hashem the tumor was not cancer was benign I went home and two weeks later I went to get the at the Checker by the surgeon I noticed a lot of mucus in my nose the doctor said that's not a mucus you have cerebral spinal fluid like CSF leak you so you're not going to require another four hour operation to close up that leak when I woke up I go doctor I think I have news you don't want to hear I really believe that I'm still leaking the surgeons at La Vie are not leaking you're imagining when he took the content out of my nose I was still leaking so I need another four to six hour open head surgery and Paul Hashem all the operations were successful I think a college bowl for that and I went home but they told me my vision would not be 2020 because in order to get to the benign tumor they had to knock the optic nerve out of its place but again do the tremendous kindness tremendous for Hashem my vision came back I forgot with October November December that year a couple months later I saw a nose every time I ate food would come out of my mouth so on February or March of 1996 I went to Dr bookbinder at Mount Sinai hospital and he said to me due to all the operations due to all the surgeries scar tissue or skin wrapped around my jaw and that's why I can't open my mouth fully and that's why food is falling out he told me I would need another now and a half surgery after I recovered I went for radiation treatments to move what was left of the tumor again I thank Hashem the radiation was so minute the bachama and no hair loss no no sheer whatsoever when the radiation treatments were completed were finished I'm guessing I must have said to myself this is it hopefully no more operations no more major medical procedures no more radiation in September of 1997 my father goes to me my sister and brother-in-law come back from Israel from a wedding my father sent me I'll drive my car today up on a new Drive theirs so I was on the Van Wyck Highway towards Kennedy airport when I went white if I was driving the economy right in front of another car but the Palm I didn't see them I see the other car I thank Hashem no one got killed I think Hashem no caught got damaged and I think Hashem no one got injured so I went from one eye doctor to another and another dark eye doctor said no problem you come once a week or once or twice a week to my office you'll do exercises in my office and your vision will improve but what he told me my vision was decrease and was not increasing but was decreasing every day I was seeing less and less so I went to a doctor Joe Mandela newer ophthalmologist at Mount Sinai Hospital and by the time I went to see him I could no longer see on one of my eyes he said to me you're probably going to go blind in the other eye also oh wow I thank Hashem that he blessed me with an Incredible family and great parents and my loving family and my great parents my beautiful parents did some homework and they found out about Dr Scott Foreman at Westchester County Medical Center Dr Foreman has a technique called the hyperbaric chamber it's either glass tube of plastic do I forgot but you line it for two hours a day twice a day and you receive oxygen Dr Foreman told me undergone this oxygen procedure you can keep the eyesight they have but can't get back what I lost so I did exactly I used to go to Tri-State for two hours a piece for the oxygen oxygen treatments but every time you enter leave the hyper bag chamber a nurse takes your temperature so one day I was leaving and the nurse said to me you have 103. I imagine you said to me you want me to contact any of your family or friends I don't want to lie I don't remember what I said to her but I'm guessing I must say I'm an adult you have any tylenolsom Advil looking back again I thank Hashem she didn't listen to me the nurse put me on the side for observation she watched me and monitored me my temperature went up to 105 and I went unconscious I had meningitis I was unconscious for two and a half days I think I woke up on Everest a couple days later I was put back in an ambulance towards Mount Sinai Hospital but I had to undergo another six hour open head surgery after that Dr fomi said there's nothing he can do because the cheat once interrupted and around Hanukkah of 1997 I went completely blind at the age of 26. Wow Wow you went through so many challenges no not that's all from Hashem he loves me daily how do you go through that what streams so I tell you besides my beautiful family I think Hashem for giving me a loving family and great parents all tremendous the four reasons I continue first is Hashem we say hashems our precious father I I tell you when I dive and I feel I'm talking face to face mouth-to-mouth I die dashem I Shia I see Hashem holding me in hand like I'm his little baby I'll tell you a story you're not going to believe before I got married when I lived with my parents had a job sucking candies on a dining room table and I wanted to take a sucking candy so I went to it and it wasn't there the jaw I went all around the dining room table couldn't find it I sat on the couch wondered where it could be I'm not lying to you in my head I saw a hand or finger pointed to left and it wouldn't stop I wanted to left the couch that's where the candy was wow I'll tell you another story I um I sometimes listen to the news so I have a portable radio and I drop my port away the radio on the kitchen floor kitchen floor is flat and one battery was near the radio the other one started rolling under the table I go Hashem I know this is a test I need sign from you the minute I said the battery rolled right back to me because Hashem is saying La Vie I'm holding you don't worry but one thing I got I think I got to live because I say I started saying thank you to Hashem I started appreciating what I do have not what I don't have I tell everyone when you appreciate what you do have you realize you have a lot more than you realize the second item that made me continues my Webby why you'd Upon Us my father calls him an angel or malach my mother calls him a father a tati he's really been there for my family third is the Jewish people I tell you when I was in that when oh amazing amazing when I was in the hospital I felt bad for my non-jewish roommates had no one visiting them except maybe the family besides my family I'd stop my women from medical residents this woman Mrs Khan this guy Mickey medical it was just friends it's just incredible and the last time they made me continuous taiva through time I realized Hashem everything Hashem does is for my best is gamzulu toys for my best even if I don't understand how it's for my best and I tell everyone when you learn and live tell you where they're going to start dancing and singing you're going to be much more happy you're gonna feel you have a purpose in real life and a mission to live and you can thank Hashem for making you a Jew wow he's seeing the light in the darkness I feel it it's amazing uh you touched upon this a little bit I had to scoot the marriage to be able to dominate with you in you know very stiff in the shoes and I felt it was like the Daphne was good Schmidt it was amazing if you could touch upon that for a moment so so can I give an example let's say I arrange for you to make the meet Jeff Bezos the the guy who runs Amazon if you could meet him for 20 minutes you'll be practicing for months you you're talking to the king of all kingshu controls Jeff Bezos he controls everything about your finger only moves if just Shem says that it's a move when you realize what you're doing you realize that Hashem controls your Panasonic controls your health you realize you know I'll tell you a story the other day I couldn't find my keys to my apartment and I I came to Castleton mall and I put five dollars into the stalker and I didn't want me about this I'm not lying to you I checked my pocket before it was not there when I left them out I checked the pocket and the key was there and it was not there before no because when you dive into Hashem Hashem controls nature Hashem controls everything you have to realize Hashem is your father Vena wants to help you but you have to ask him for it and you have to wear he loves your deal he loves you more than you love yourself and you realize you're talking to the king of all Kings who's your father who wants to just help you how can you not die with him what an inspiring message we're going to be the reason the talk of town was the Hassan the amazing wedding Hashem that you had many good ladies have big rabbits were there but if you could touch upon how all that happened so as I tell you in November a year ago around a friend of mine around a little more than a year ago a friend of mine said there's a a cover a grave of a big Sonic of a righteous person in Buffalo New York and he told me I'm his sister and all our friends went there and his sister and all her friends except for one all got married oh so we went there in March a friend of mine arranged for a guy we only could spend 15 minutes because we have to help with the Civic use for men come out unfortunately we make the show but we're ready for mouth two weeks later a guy called me up Levy we have to hi to get married and that was right before pesos after pay so they got to work at the meantime they offered my name to my my not my newly beautiful wife nakama and now to become a green span but they pulled the name for me they said we don't think it's shy she stayed up on she stayed up the night and said to stay with him twice that night and during the day and and then they came the name back to her but also in two weeks into dating and then I went to Israel a couple months later I still wasn't sure when I was in Israel an 18 year old girl who came to me or 1890 can you die from me for sure because I figured let me just start try this downfall enough for myself and just things just started turning around I just saw the hand of Hashem it's just so clear and what's crazy the night of my wedding was the same night at the name that you say of the Buffalo Webbie wow yeah it's all and I'm connected with you commotion was used I know what you know what I'm saying you know there's a lot of people unfortunately go through a lot of difficulties they have hardships whether it's on buys whether it's the children whether it's paranasa what message are you able to tell people that you know whether it's healthy issues that people have if it would be a generic message that you could give to people having difficulties in life you went through the first time I call it challenges everything I shamed is for that everything Hashem does for the best but I I tell you too one of them what he said but I'll repeat up another message is we don't see the whole picture I once spoken Out song before some adults and one adult said so you say Hashem does everything the best I I don't see that so I said you give your baby um shots he goes yeah how can you do it you make your baby cry because we don't see the whole stricture if we know the whole picture everything will make sense we have to realize Hashem is our father do nothing to hurt us but but you also have to appreciate what you do have not what you don't have and the more you appreciate what you do have the more you're gonna smile I'll tell you in a credible story think of a piece of concert the story in 1970s I think there was a shooting I think the universe called Kent State in Kansas and a a kid there got shot from his back and was was paralyzed on his back from his head down and a father told the washiva ahead of Yeshiva you got to go visit my son okay so he could wash comes in and figures the son is depressed and he sees him smiling he goes I asked something five days ago you're able to walk for four days now you can't walk anything how could you smile he goes well Shiva Rabbi when I first woke when I first realized I was paralyzed from my neck down I was depressed but every day I look across the hall and we're here in the hospital and I see a guy against a bucket of ice cream and he puts the bucket over his head when he finishes to look at the inside I think Hashem are not like him when you really appreciate what you do have you realize you have much more than you will you can write down first so people can see people here people people smell walk the fingers walk and talk just being a Jew you know the marriage is just to be a Jew a son of a child son or daughter of Hashem doesn't matter to be a Jew to keep Shabbos you know I I tell you I'm missing Shabbos candles I tell everyone if Hashem made me blind to teach me the importance of learning until you understand I miss shopping I miss I'm I I miss tell you what your man is like right now I'm seeing you in front of my eyes are standing safer like I'm unlearning it I miss toy with your Menace and I also miss seeing the beautiful Shabbos candles but you know me I don't have anyone lives without Shabbos kodesh I just don't understand how you live without Shabbos let alone without them let alone without the mitzvahs just you have to appreciate what you do have not what you don't have if you don't appreciate what you do have you're never going to be happy and you everything go your way you can be a multi-billionaire healthy but if you don't appreciate what you do have you're never going to be out smiling and besides appreciate what you do have you have to say thank you tashem thank you for letting me walk thank you let me see thank you for giving me a job thank you for giving me you know you have this I think you take your side thing you say you think you touch them that's what it is all about you yeah appreciation thinking that's all yeah Hallelujah but that's what made Joseph go through what he went through because you also realized that it's all from Hashem is from his father in fact our matiz the the winemaker and the bread maker why you guys say it he couldn't answer he couldn't understand it because it's all for my sham you mentioned about learning and seeing extender how is learning working right now through audio so I do audio I'm some of these are fed Flintstones I still listen to cassette tapes in fact the Lighthouse for the blinds that could say tapes are valuable to blind people because it's a very easy to use I also collect I also speak to a lot of godon for DeVito I call every week though from Lakewood how about Newman had just recently moved to Lakewood um I just speak to all different all the time you know I I I I I I Collective abundant yeah from Chicago you know I collected unbelievable can I just can I just leave you off yeah please sure so I was in Chicago once for a wedding and my friend and I stayed there for Shabbos so when I got to the shoe I couldn't find my friends so I went to Daven in Mill of Donnie it's not gonna so I got the guy could please stop on me I don't like talking during diving I wouldn't stop so I left that part of the show part of the synagogue and I went to a different part after adopting my friend said to me la vie you were diving in the woman section with two women I thought another funny story I was a mostly music music in ballpark they still haven't read yaakov shweki of course so I thought a little hashish boy came in so I saw her tapping on his head like that he left the store so I go to the salesman where'd he go he goes we were hitting a 93 odd woman on the head she's not like getting hit on the head I was in here on QR nails for Sharp is that because they were and they gave me the key they said find out what I could be on we're locking the bottom lock so I went with to my friend's house and we came back after dinner and and my family was trying the cake because Olivia there like the top lock it doesn't make sense okay he went to the side or he went home to see my father knows the code okay we were sitting on the porch waiting for them to come home and they go to my friend Q please give me the key he gave me the key I put the key in the door and I said okay even meaning everything's from you Hashem the door opened up wow when you realize it's all from Hashem he's gonna want to help you seeing light in darkness that's exactly what uh you're speaking about people that are you know able to see don't even have such a Muna like you have it but yeah with us unbelievable uh we have a minute ago customer talks the final message for our broad audience if there's something you could find a takeaway to realize you're never alone in life hashems with me I'm not there's no reason because you have to realize Hashem is walk with you every step of your life hashem's holding you in his hand like a little baby but to appreciate what you do have not what you don't have the more you appreciate what you do have the more you will as you're wealthy to get close to a baby like hazak is incredible just wants to help you guys out no khazak did not pay me to say that but you know I have to do that like my point is the third cry so we like grab onto the table tiger will give you happiness and tell you will give you a purpose in your life I know I said it before but there's nothing like tell you I especially people learn time I see they're always happy inside and out there so but your commotion is worship of Lakewood I've been to his house he lives in a simple Max he has all a three bedroom apartment if at all he's the happiest man rob laser Ginsburg webinar Brooklyn again maybe three men the apartment he's the happiest man and the all these guys could either have four houses but they don't want it because you know to serve Hashem that the house is not permanently just uh you know how long could you live in a house you're eventually going to have to break it down and rebuild it and even that house there's a period of time for as long as it could last for nobody comes to Torah yeah it's forever and even they have more than one that's how you get a half a million dollar car is that going to really give you happiness toy will give you happiness Shabbos will give you happiness being a Jew gives you happiness such inspiration such as so amazing you're an inspiration for us all we want to thank you for joining us on touring and I would like to wish everyone had success in all their life Endeavors may you always feel hashems walking your hand in hand foot by foot your entire life I mean we should always see light even when it's times of darkness and we're Levy or you're an inspiration and we thank you very much thank you all the kids of all the inspiration we want to give a shout out to all those over here at kazak are working behind the scenes making so much toraham it's about doing great things the entire staff the board the volunteers the obeying the teachers everyone in the Chicago world to you shout out to tour anytime for hosting this amazing tour talk along with all the other platforms and podcasts that we have this program on uh Tuesday nights it's aired at 8 30 PM Eastern Standard Time please share and afford the family friends if you have suggestions of future guests for Torah talks feel free to email info.org I want to give a shout out to Mayor begun as well for arranging and suggesting women yes he's at Sonic and we appreciate it mayor thank you any suggestions for futures uh speakers or rabbis to join the program please feel free to email kazak and shout out to dailygiving.org.com a dollar day goes very very far away and uh