Rabbi David Ashear | Getting Ready for Rosh Hashanah | CHAZAQ

[Music] everyone welcome to tonight's very special Shure it's being dedicated and loving memory of Ben amen amen it's being dedicated by the B family want to thank the entire family DAV father the entire M just give him a round of applause for dedicating tonight here to um we have a great great great honor to hear from hear from him momentarily the rabbi is a renowned speaker who inspires so many people thousands of people through his amazing shim amazing lectures powerful um books Forum which which are are across the globe Inspire so many people and um we want to of course we want to thank Shalay the entire Jewish congregation of hillcrist for hosting tonight's uh event together with with u kazak and of course you know the beginning of the the the school year and um everyone who's sitting right here we should think about everyone knows at least one um uh parent a CO um a colleague co-worker neighbor well children in public school and we should we should say what are we going to do about it we can't just sit on the sidelines we have to do something about it we should we should reach out to them and tell them about about giving the importance of giving them a Jewish Education and of course kazak is on the Forefront with after school programs Sunday school programs in over 20 different locations in New York in in in Arizona and Los Angeles we just opened up a location last week in in in Florida and of course we have a division called Public School Yeshiva division which has transferred over 1,700 students from public school Yeshiva since 2017m but of course that's only small amount you know there's tens of thousands of kids who have children in public school we should we should do something about it and of course um reach tell them to reach out to kazak and kazak's actually having um a special raffle it's on the banner over there you can scan the QR code it's a special 360 raffle where you can enter the raffle and you can um you could there's only 360 tickets being sold you can actually win um $10,000 the potential to win $10,000 you can scan the QR code you can go to raise. it/ kazak and um of course we we want to we want to welcome the rabbi for for joining us in the community thank you for taking from your pry schedule of course rir is um he's not need an introduction everyone knows himem over 350,000 copies of the rabbis books Farm are are printed and thousands of people learn it every single day get kuk get inspiration and uh something that I thought of recently is is maybe the the the the name of the rabbis book could just be called like amuna why is it called living amuna so I think I think maybe a reason is is because the the the rabbi is infusing infusing all the lessons with with passion with love life and we look forward to hearing tonight so everyone please rise and thank you uhak is Saving Lives saving every child bringing them closer to Tora it's no less than it's even greater than so anything we can do to help is ours there's a brought down in the that on this Wednesday There's a minhag to fast a fast day and one of the reasons for this minhag is that we're supposed to enter the holiday of R humbled supposed to enter in with with humility to know that we are facing our creator and someone comes in with a fast then he feels humbled if someone can fast they don't have to fast but the main thing is that we come into the day of r with humility the gar says that anyone who starts off the year with humility the year ends up being in the end a year of great blessing a year of the prayers that we have on this day of and yur the rabbis tell us have the ability to bring up all the T lord of the entire year that maybe weren't with kabana that maybe weren't the way they were supposed to be this is a day these days are days of complete Focus we're supposed to enter we're supposed to analyze every word like we're counting diamonds even though maybe all year we may space out we're reading we have to have an extra this is the right in front of us let me concentrate on the words I'm not going to look around my friends I'm focused I have a goal I have to concentrate on every word it's brought down there's a seula that before you start praying to say the and understand the meaning of the words is a great Sig to have your prayers accepted is another great to say with understanding many say that took place on R sh in general we don't cry on R sh but if during when you're reading the poem about the if it brings you to tears it's also a great we're on our best behavior on this day you have to feel the entire time you're in the presence of the m and it's a very very opportune time we don't mention the word sin on the holiday we take it and we want to be everything proper everything the best you can't imagine you know we eat sweet Foods we're going to make sure we have honey and sugar the best seula is for you to be sweet for you to be easygoing not let things bother you that's the main siga I saw a story brought down took place some years ago in benak there was a fellow who was going to his in-laws to for the meal on the first night of R and they were going to walk to the other side of B and he prayed early he tells his wife I want to make sure that I'm on time for very important it's the first tiil the entire year please could you be ready at 6:00 whatever the time was so we can go and she said yes of course and 5:45 is coming around she's not even close to being ready he's looking at his watch they're not even close he said what's going to be the first the year I'm going to be lat to I asked her to be ready on time and she's T she's doing what she needs to do his blood is boiling I can't believe it I want to be on time finally at 6:30 half hour late she's ready to go he's thinking to himself I cannot believe this is happening I'm going to be late on sh at this time he doesn't know if he's going to make any part of the so they start walking he's thinking in his mind should I explode at her should I tell her what's wrong he calms himself down he says look who am I going to serve right now who am I going to pray to Hashem does Hashem want me to explode on my wife I don't think so he was able to bite his tongue he held back he said we walked nice Pace I didn't rush her and I came to the to terms I'm going to be late to the first prayer of the year he walked into arid halfway through he said he did the best that he could he went to eat the meal on the way back home he's thinking again should I say something I can't believe she did this to me he says you know Hashem I know you don't want me to make her feel bad at all about this I'm going to swallow it and it's not going to bother me anymore and he said we got home that night and that was the story and it receded to the back of my mind he said but then something that year took place from the moment the year started my mazal my fortune was on another level everything I touched turned to gold and I'm waiting the whole year for it to run out I said when when is all this blessing going to end and he said till the last day of the year I just kept rising and rising and everything I touched turned to Gold he said I thought back about my last year I said I didn't do anything special this year I was a regular guy my regular ups and downs I couldn't pinpoint why Hashem blessed me so much the only thing I could think of was that episode on rosha sh when I didn't explode at my wife when I was able to be he said that's what I attribute my wondrous Year to you don't know how far one overcoming of a mid could help us on a like we don't mention sin we said we don't even eat an OS cuz it has the same numerical value as Sin but we don't want why don't we mention sin why don't we eat food that have to do because we don't want a we don't want the bad angels in heaven coming and saying bad things about us but the taught us a secret that during the blowing of the chaar when the Satan is confused he's not able to open his mouth during that time we have a very very special golden opportunity on R to make a v the used to think in his mind things that he needed to improve things he know he did wrong and during the cha he made a v in his mind that's the time the entire holiday where we could get in a little T and have no no worry about the Satan brings in his he says technically even though you're not allowed to talk once you make the the till it's all over he said if if you were in a congregation and they wanted to pause in the cha for people to make V you'd be allow to even talk it's not a it's part of the of course we have to have in mind we're fulfilling from the T we're crowning Hashem the king the meel is coming to be with us for 10 days Hashem is going to be amidst us amongst us it says every every prayer is even if you're alone is like you have a minan with you for these 10 days the greatest presence of the takes place on these 10 days people what would they do we fly to Israel to go to the Cel to have a moment with a presence of sh you don't have to go anywhere the sh comes to us and we have to take advantage of of these awesome days ahead now part of crowning Hashem King is we have to understand who the Mel is there's a z he writes that on the day of R some people come into shul and they say give me give me give me give me give me money give me Health give me food give me blessing the Z had used his very sharp words he says they're like dogs you come into like a dog saying give me give me give me and from this Zohar we became afraid to ask for any personal requests on R to Zar I don't want to be a dog and we don't make requests but I saw an explanation what does it mean to ask like a dog it says if someone made a vow Kar says he made a vow I don't want to get any pleasure from you his friend he said that too then he went to the rabba and he said RAB I want to make I feel bad my friend benefits me and I don't benefit him I don't want to be like a dog he says who takes and doesn't give back a dog is somebody who takes and doesn't give but if you are someone who is asking Hashem give me life I want life not for me but I want life for you Hashem I want money why do I want money I'm not going to sit and play games with it all day I want money to do good things I want to support organizations like hak I want to be able to give charity I I want to be able to help people if you ask hasem for blessing then you're not asking like a dog then you're asking the right way it is the way it is the way of Jewish people of all Jewish people to take a a portion of everything that we do and we dedicate a peace to Hashem a person it says Has a Field you don't take everything for yourself you leave off the corner of the field to the poor we leave the we sanctify everything we do by giving a portion to hasem you want to have a meal Hashem wants you to enjoy the meal but give him a piece make make make you're giving a of what you are what he's giving you you give it back to him this is the wonderful midah that we have everything we do in life we give a peace to Hashem there's something that's so important something that's so vital to our lives when we ask Hashem give me life give me life Hashem I want a year of health and life what do you what piece of your life are you giving to Hashem it is brought down that if somebody committed an act of murder and he goes to the it says that his Rabbi has to go with him to the ml what his Rabbi do his Rabbi didn't do anything but since it says in the that you have to live in the he has to have life and if he doesn't have a rabbi teaching him Torah it's like he's dead therefore the rabbi has to go with him because he has to have life and our rabbis learned from here what's life if a person doesn't have the book The the great Torah that Hashem gave us in his life he's not living real life life is a life life of the book a life of Torah it's hard for people to dedicate their whole entire day to learning Torah we understand but one of the first questions a person going to be asked after 120 is did you designate a part of your day did you designate the day for Torah study this is a Mitzvah on men and women alike women are oblig ated to encourage their husbands their children go learn it's okay I got it and the husband has to take the the initiative and say I want to learn somebody I was trying to convince him one year to add some Torah to his schedule he says Rabbi it's so hard I don't have time I said I want you to come to to learn gar few times a week three times a week he says too much I can't I don't have time this I told him how many hours a week of life does Hashem give you he added it up 168 said 168 hours I'm asking you to give three out of 168 to Hashem he said well Rabbi if you put it that way I guess it's not that much and he started coming Monday Tuesday Wednesday at 9:00 at night to learn this man became a bowl of fire of Torah he can't go a day without he's learning in the morning now learning at night learning on Shabbat learning on Sunday seven days a week morning and night and he says Tor is my life now something he couldn't see himself doing for 3 hours now he's doing maybe 20 hours a week this is something that if you have it in your schedule great add more and if you don't have it this is what we're asking for life for Hashem I want life so I could delve into your Torah I want life I want to know what everybody I was so jealous this a year ago I was in a Shool in the summer and I saw young boys on Shabbat afternoon for 2 hours open the gimar and they're learning themselves 25-year-old young men I said where's the rabbi no the rabbi teaches us during the week on Shabbat we review and they're going at it and these are regular guys they didn't go to Yeshiva even and they're fighting with each other and I said I wish everyone in my sh could do that could sit together with a break your head and try to figure out the G it was so beautiful and that's a great goal what our rabbis looked at the Tor we know the famous story of hak it was snowing one one day he couldn't get into the B mid he goes up on the roof and the snow is piling up on him in the morning they see him he almost died and they asked how could he do that he knows you don't die it's not one of the three sins that you die for how could H ex put his life at risk like that and then meim tell us H knows that if you don't have Torah in your life even one day it's not a life it's not it's not P not even life like when was told you're not allowed to teach T from the Romans he got up and he T us said what are you doing he said if I don't have to like a fish out of water I'm dead if I don't have Tor it's not even a question so one thing we're going to sayem please give us life give us life so we can utilize the lives that you gave us to study your book you have to go to your Rabbi Rabbi I want to learn more I want to I want to I want to become involved this is the greatest thing because Torah is the energy for religion also people sometimes we feel a little bit LAX or not so into it we don't feel we're just doing things by Road t for the Nish is like the fire it gives you energy it gives you emotion it gives you everything it makes a person better in every way a wife who has a husband who's learning strong and is in the suya is a much better husband he's better at business he's better at home he's better everywhere that's the power of our great Torah you know one of the things that was supposed to come on R sh the M's coming one of the things that we're supposed to say is Hashem we're so happy with your kingship we're so happy that you are our King a year ago at this time we were all in mourning our was not a the most difficult year and we're still in it but as we get to the end of the year now Hashem is giving us raise of Hope where we're watching one after another of these go down Hashem is giving us strength I saw it says in this in the in the Holy books that there's a man by the name of adus at the end of days adus is going to try to take over and when adus goes down it's a Prelude to the mashia and I heard somebody saying is the same G we don't know what's it what's coming up now we're looking forward to Glorious Days Ahead we're looking forward to a year of Happiness a year of success a year of mashia but it's up to us obviously Hashem still wants something from us we have to step up some people they're practicing tan but in their minds they still have a lot of questions on Hashem there's a lot of people who don't ask the questions they keep them in the back of their mind and they they get to them you know Rabbi you teach me that Hashem is so kind and so this but how come I had a year like this this year why is it so hard why can't I make parasa why isn't my daughter married yet why isn't my sister why aren't the hostages back and there's a lot of questions and we come and we say if hashem's really so merciful why why how could I go through another sh last year I asked for this that and nothing changed why should I think something's going to change this year these are questions and I always say before you ask a question you have to know who you're talking about on Ros sh there's a wondrous prayer called t t we're not really throwing away our sins you need to make for that but in the there a wondrous prayer you'll see all beautiful requests in that prayer of Tash it begins with the 13 M of as described in the called and there's a book called The Who describes in depth what each of the mid of Hashem are who he is and if you read about who Hashem is there's no questions me who's like you AEM you know what that means Hashem is so kind even though when he's pumping life into us he's giving us life at the same moment we're using it against him we're sinning who would do that while someone's hurting you to keep supplying him Hashem continues to supply us life he gives us oxygen and and a heart that beats and a brain that works even while we sin but it goes further after we sin it says he's no he says let me carry the sin for you it's too heavy I don't want you to get punished he stols and stols and he he Bears the weight of the sin and if you go through every midah it's unbelievable it's as a human being you Hur him you go against him he's never going to like you the same if you say you're sorry he likes you better than before even after you sinned a million times against him and we there's a and there's a called what's he treats us like the closest Family relationship possible he calls us his wife wife his child his daughter his son his his mother everything is all the Jewish people are described as the closest possible relationship we read in the when a Jew goes through pain he experiences the pain go find me a doctor in the world who will give someone a shot to help him and he has to feel the pain I don't want to feel the pain Hashem will not give anyone any pain in this world unless he is willing to Bear it and each person only has to bear his own pain Hashem Bears the pain of millions of Jews all at the same time why would he do it only because he knows it's a shot that you need someone once said Rabbi my child is going through so much pain I love my child so much how could Hashem do this if he loves my child more than I do and I told her what it said in I said we're only able to love our children because hasem gives us a tinge of his love any emotion we have is an emotion given to us we're created beings as much love and emotion that you could have you got it from him you have a little bit an inklink of his love he lets you experience in children in spouses the love that he has is incomprehensible it's beyond us so when we know who we're talking about we don't have so many questions I once read a story the story took place in Israel it was about a man he said about himself that he had the biggest business meeting of his life he woke up one morning and he looked at his car and he was a little bit over the line he had a ticket on his car 500 shalim he was F fuming I can't believe I got this ticket okay I got to focus on my meeting he's driving to work on the way to work there's a one lane Highway the guy in front of him is going 5 miles an hour he's so angry he's briting the guy he's Hing he's not moving he goes around him he passes him on the one lane the police sirens go off they pull him over a thousand shek ticket BL now he's really upset he's burning with anger he finally gets to work his boss looks at him and he says today the day if you do well with the meeting I'm promoting you today your life's going to be different he says okay I got he goes to his office to prepare the meetings in a half hour all of a sudden he gets a phone call from the old age home that his father's staying at they say ysf your father's not eating again it's dangerous it's been a long time you're the only who can get him to eat could you please come right away emergency you got to get him to eat says now I have my meeting it's PES he gets in the car he speeds over there he gets to he sees his father in the garden he goes up and says Dad what are you doing just put the food in your mouth you're making me miss my biggest meeting of my life why can't you just eat and he's screaming at his father his father is so embarrassed his father has a tear in his eye he says go back to your meeting I don't need you here and he turns around and walks away he says you can't leave till you eat I have to see you eating you the father goes to his room he comes back and he hands his son YF a diary YF looks he says what's this he says read that he opens up to the page it's dated June 1971 and this is what it says today this is the father writing about himself today I missed a very important business meeting because my little yusi woke up with pain in his ear and he was crying I took him to the doctor and he needed surgery I lost my promotion that day because I missed the meeting but it was worth it I would do anything for my precious son Yosi that night Yosi was in a lot of pain and he didn't want to eat I tried for over an hour telling him stories kissing and hugging him for every bite that he took and I managed to get a few bites in he woke up eight times that night crying in pain and each time I went to his bed I held him and I calmed him down I sang to him I put him back to sleep and the song I sang was Daddy loves you more than anything daddy will never let you down my precious Yosi fell asleep holding my hands tightly each time ysf had no idea what his father did for him dozens of years ago YF didn't know how much his father loved him if we would see the diary that Hashem has about us it would say something like my precious child I love you more than you could imagine everything I put you through was only to help you when you're in pain I'm in pain I'm only asking you to go through this because I want you to enjoy with me forever and ever if we would think about who Hashem is we won't have any questions we'll trust the Mel we'll say Mel we're so happy to be in your kingdom we love you Kingdom even the things that seem so chaotic so crazy how could it be I was so good Hashem I tried so hard and you let me down somebody once told me a story after he told me the story I said I heard that one before to myself that's a very classic story but then he added one line after and I told him that's the best story I ever heard what was the story he told me that his grandfather mosheim lived in the 1920s in Yugoslavia running a very successful business he had a friend who also had a successful business and one day that friend asked he said my grandfather to coign on a loan that he desperately needed the loan was for a lot of money and the bank wanted MOS to put his business on collateral if he would sign co-sign the loan mosim couldn't tell his friend no his friends doing well he co-signed PS the business failed they came after MOS and they took his whole business here he is out of a job he looked for another job he couldn't find anything he decided to pick up his family and move to America and start a new business there andem he found a successful business and by the time he passed away he had 109 grandchildren all each one of them helping CLA in their own way the man telling me the story was the principal of in in and Los Angeles every one of them a star in their own right and he said when the Holocaust came around my grandfather's city was completely wiped out and because he went to America his life was spared and that's when I said in my mind I heard that one but then he told me the following he said could you imagine after my grandfather father did that and he lost his business imagine his prayers to Hashem Hashem I just put my business on the line for my friend and this is what you do to me you take away please let me just find another job here and then he went to the business and he knocked on the door no no no every job he went to no he's getting shut down he felt so bad all I did was help one of your children has and this is what happens and what is Hashem saying in Shay you're worried about your business I'm worried about your 109 grandchildren I'm worried about your future please trust me there's nothing better for you now than to be told no and no and no we have to trust we're in the best hands we have the best me he takes care of us we have to come into saying we're so happy there's a in the T called you have to be happy with all the good Hashem has given you what a time when you come and say I'm so happy I'm so happy with the life you have given me I know everything you do is for my best it's a funny Mitzvah to be happy with everything that you have that's good why wouldn't I be happy if I have something good aren't you automatically happy and the answer is unfortunately we're not happy because the yet is a very good tactic he tells us to look at everybody else Hashem why don't I have his job why don't I have his wife why don't I have his kids why isn't my daughter married like his daughter's married and we look around at everybody else and we say why not me why do they have why do they have and we're no longer happy I once saw masal there was a guy he had Fields apple orchards all different kinds of fields he was making a nice living someone came over to him one day and they say you see this diamond wow yeah this one diamond is worth more than all your fields comined trust me you're in the wrong business you got to go into diamonds this is where it's at the guy looked at his Fields like nothing he sold all his Fields he takes the money looking for diamonds he's trying to find the diamond like that not even close he go he gets depressed I can't find any diamonds I have the money now I don't have a business he's all depressed about his life the guy that bought his Fields he's walking in one of the fields one day there's a stream that goes through the field he trips on something in the Stream he looks down he picks up looks like a diamond he takes it to the diamond de wow that's the most beautiful Diamond I ever saw he goes back to the stream the stream is filled with diamonds the guy struck it rich his field is filled with diamonds you see the guy who used to have these field he was sitting on diamonds he just didn't realize it everyone's life you're sitting on diamonds you have so much good going for you don't let the yet tell you otherwise don't let him tell you you're missing this you're missing that you're missing this we have so much good I read in my shal not a my sh it says in the gimar the gar tells us that at a wedding what do you tell the bride at a wedding say you tell the bride like it is and bet say you say the bride is beautiful so tells bet you're going to lie if she's not be you're going to lie so betel replied he said well if somebody buys something from the marketplace you're going to tell them that it's bad say how is that an answer to the question he asked him are you going to lie and he said well if you buy something from the market place what are you going to say the answer is there's no such thing as anyone who's perfect everyone has flaws everyone has positives bet says tell the Katan about all the positive his wife has this his wife she's great of course there's bad too only focus on the positive someone buys something of course not everything is great there's there's a million floor imagine somebody he buys a car from the junkyard gets a nice deal on the car little teeny car he's going to use it to go back and forth locally someone could look at that car and say ah you bought a lemon you can't even drive it on the highway what is this car worth ah you wasted your money he looks at it terrible somebody else could say wow what a car look how small it is you're only using it locally right you get parking all the time unbelievable this car doesn't even need so much gas wow un he feels great about it the very same item you focus on the good it's great you f the same is true with relationships with spouses somebody is married you're married to Gold but what's the problem sometimes we focus on the negative oh she has this or he has this I can't live with this I can't live with that if you're focused on the good say look what I have look how much good this person does look look how great they are one of the things that we have to do there's so much heartache in the world we have to make our homes a happy place we have to make our spouses happy give them attention both ways I was once went to a Shalom B Class the rabbi was speaking he said he said the couple was older they their last child got married they're in the house now and the wife tells the husband I want a divorce he said what I'm bored we have nothing in common anymore all the kids are out of the house I think we should go in our separate ways the guy couldn't believe it I don't want to get divorced he goes to his Rabbi says Rabbi what should I do he says do you ever compliment her do you ever tell her you love her I think so yeah I think when we got married I told her I think I don't know you're not complimenting her enough you're not giving her enough attent says take my advice every night at dinner think of a new compliment to tell her the next night at dinner he says did I ever tell you what a good cook you are she said no this food is delicious it's unbelievable yeah she liked it the next night he says did I ever tell you how beautiful you look no you look beautiful yeah every night something later on maybe a week into it he says did I ever tell you how I love the way you fold my socks in the drawer unbelievable the the socks are yeah the rabbi called her up said how's things going with your husband she says Rabbi I can't wait for dinner each night I can't wait that's all it is a little word a little compliment a little spice you had gold right in front of you but you didn't realize it we don't realize the good till it's taken away we don't want to get to that how our rabbis appreciated so much it says about Rabbi gifter every minute that he had in life was so precious his students saw him every afternoon he closed his gar for 10 minutes went home and came back Rabbi where you go every day he says listen my wife she helps me learn she goes out to work when she comes home is it not be fitting for me to show her to give her a smile when she comes home I said wow what a lesson what a lesson what appreciating someone how much it gives them they you giving them strength to do more you appreciate someone you tell someone look what you did yeah I didn't even know I did that I want to do more for you that's the way it works there was a well-known story many years ago there was a a uh a man he couldn't have children for many years finally he has a child but laeno the child had to be put in the ICU and the nurses work day and night helping this child for 3 months and and then the day came they're bringing the child home for the first time his baby's coming home he tells his Rabbi Rabbi these nurses are angels they worked over time every day I want to buy them a gift Rabbi what should I get them should I get them chocolate should I get him flowers the rabbi said when they helped the Jews with their babies you know what Hashem gave them he gave them kuk by seeing the fruits of their labor it says he showed them that their work had meaning I want you to bring your child back every year to the hospital on his birthday and show them the fruits of their labor and that's what he did every year he brought his child back on his third birthday he knows how to talk now he tells the nurses thank you thank you for helping me and the nurses loved it every year they look forward Yosi is coming he comes in the old the nurses crowd around him they're pinching his cheeks and for 12 years till his bar mitz for every year he came and they said thank you to the nurses many years later one of the nurses saw this father and she said I want to tell you something it's very difficult for us we work over time we work hard and we never get any feedback every time we we have a question now should we put in the extra we think of your son and we say look what we're doing look what we're doing there's many many more like this we don't see it it gives them strength when you give someone a compliment when you give it gives strength on sh we're supposed to come to with Hashem you do so much he doesn't need us but it's for us Hashem what do year here you gave me so much I owe you everything please Hashem I love your kingship I love everything about my life you're so kind he knows what we need he knows what we need but if you come and you show when someone gives hakar when they don't give hakar imagine a Yesa you donated to them they called you up they never could you give another donation they never said a thank you letter they never said anything you don't want to give them but if they send you a thank you they send you a gift you we appreciate you so much they call you I want to give you double that's how Hashem is I appreciate you so much Hashem we have to come on this sh it's not a day about us it's a day about him it's a day that we recognize his kingship it's a day that we want to serve him it's a day to Dream It's a day to say what could I do with my potential you give me so much what do I do for you I want to do more it's a time during the also to make a CALA I'm going to be better this year I'm going to do this this year if we come at the right attitude we come on happy with the me we trust the me then the me will return in kind we should be blessed with a year of in every aspect with and the great awesome coming of the mashia amen amen [Applause]