Rabbi Avrohom Walkin | Riding The Waves Of Life | CHAZAQ

[Music] okay um first I have to do this also thank you TOR anytime thank you kak but I really need to thank mostly from from the that I'm here nishas and I you just got to be careful with the with the yeah anyway with the baharan noise but anyway no but anyway but I want to tell you but I want to tell you I want to tell you that I I knew I knew I knew in this just started many years ago and I'll be very honest with you my son was supposed to come here correct he was supposed to come to the I remember when it was in uh on uh what was that Broadway over there anyway you know what it was very small and it was different and I'll be honest with you I was a little bit concerned to send him in the beginning all the way in the beginning and I want to tell you that it's incredible how far the Yeshiva has come really incredible I'm not trying to you know be nice I'm telling the Em I'm every year that I'm here I've been I think it's the third time I've been here and the difference every year is really really incredible and it's much like a Yeshiva and that's amazing regular K good Yeshiva of guys who are growing and guys who are learning and I'll be honest I'm a very big only because I was a very big of his father I still am of his father um whenever my wife has a Shila first thing W whenever there's a shom bias issue in my house D warer schita whatever there's something we we we call him so I will tell you that that grew up in a very special home and I don't need to tell you from the that he has fromin from Alpert from from down from his own parents and so it's a very special honor to be here that's the M it's very very special honor to be here but most importantly most importantly I want to tell you that I actually came here and I said this before we were live even I actually came here even though knowing I have to give a kabura somewhere else but I felt I owed I ow so I'm here today so the one benefit I actually think if I have a benefit if I have one is I'm not the biggest in the world I am not and I don't try to fool myself I am I don't try to fool other people that I am so I don't have to fool them they'll they'll see right away but but the truth of the matter is I take pride in one very important thing and I take pride in actually living my living my yish living My My My Religion living living Judaism and I take pride in that that I work on it I didn't say I'm where I want to be but the fact that I'm working on it is a very big thing for me so I want to start off with a story and it's very interesting cuz somebody said to me something today here and he mentioned a name and and it's funny because the story I'm about to say as he's not going to know who I'm talking about but it has something to do with a family member that he knows or close somebody a relative of his and it's just like almost because I'm about to say a story and the story has to do with a relative of this guy he might not even know it's his relative but I almost I'm almost sure it's his relative because I almost sure I think I know the family Dynamics anyway The Story Goes Like This six seven years ago I was I was driving maybe eight years ago I was driving in in Upstate New York I was driving in Fallsburg I was coming back from Stop and Shop I think it's called oh shop right coming back from shop right and I was in a bungal county at the time which I was there for 25 years place called Irvington Estates I was a Reby there I ran the day camp over there and I loved it I always would come every summer I would look forward to my spending my two months Upstate away from I didn't even take my mail from the city I I the things were shut off electricity and whatever because I just wanted to just be completely not n that I was even in New York um where I lived and I'm driving from sh from from shop right and I see a boy walking in you know there's no sidewalks there I he a boy walking in the street now this boy had a ponytail he had a nose ring he had tattoos and he wasn't wearing a yamaka and he was walking and I wasn't sure if he was Jewish or not that's the truth I was not sure if he was Jewish he didn't look Jewish but that doesn't mean anything and I just you know sometimes I I'll pick up people that are hitchhiking and most of the times I won't and I'll give an excuse that I can't pick up everybody the hitchhiking there because everyone is walking around trying to get a lift especially people that don't have cars and there are people that you know like you know a lot of CM they live in Williamsburg they don't have you know they don't have cars they don't need cars so I can't pick up everybody I meet so sometimes I'm in the mood to pick up sometimes I'm not right or wrong it's not the issue so I see this boy and I said you know what let me take a Gamble let me pick him up he looks like he's on the side of the road and I'm going that direction there's really no other direction to go I'll pick him up pick him up he gets into the car I said you go where you going he goes to Kisha bowling alley I said you're Jewish he goes yeah I said okay now sometimes I'm in the mood to get into conversation someone says what's the point but I always like to hear a good story maybe a good maybe maybe I can give him Jewish kid right so I asked him what his name is he tells me his name and then I asked him I said where you from he goes I'm from farak so I said I'm from farak and then when he told me the name I started saying second is your father still in the Kyo by Rabbi Rand so he goes yeah my father's by Rabbi Rand so I don't need to figure out what probably goes on in the house over there or what went on in the house the m is fighting his father's still a kle guy and this guy's walking around with earrings and nose rings and and whatever it is that he's wearing over there I'm sure it wasn't just like Smooth Sailing in the house so I said to him can I tell you something and he says to me I said to him I'm not going to give you muser I said you know what mus means he goes yeah because he said yeah he goes yeah I heard enough of it so I said I'm not going to give you Musa but can I tell you something that I think you might actually be happy then I might tell you this I think you're going to be happy so he tells me go for it so I realized I only had three four you know maybe five minutes till I get to his destination so I said to him I want to ask you something I said to him I said if there's a man walking with his son in the street and he thinks a car is coming at a 100 miles an hour at them he sees the the sun doesn't see it but he sees it and he can only get one of the either him or his son out of the way before the car hits he a normal father will probably I hope push his son out of the way without even thinking probably because it's a it's a it's a parental you know reaction of I care about my son it's almost like ingrained that you're going to push your son out of the way I said is that true he goes yes' so I said let me ask you a different question if this the same man is walking with his son but the problem is this man is delusional there is no car coming at 100 miles hour and he's walking with his son but he thinks the father thinks that there is a car he's delusional and he thinks he sees a car coming and there is no car coming at them at 100 miles an hour will he still push his son out of the way the answer is yes because in his mind there is a car coming at 100 mph so he will push his son hopefully out of the way first so I said to him like this I said I want to tell you something I'm not here to tell you Judaism is real I'm not here to prove yish Kai to you I'm not here cuz I told you I'm here to help you I'm not here to to give you musler I told him but I said to him I want to explain something to you if your father is delusional let's say let's just say that and he believes in a religion that's not real let's just say that's your opinion okay I'm not here to battle with him about yish kite now he believes in something called shabas he believes something called kosher he believes there something called ctis whatever it is not NGA he believes in this stuff and he believes in something called ganaden and gim right so no a normal father will try to get his son to do these things because he believes in it he believes in the consequences if you don't do it so it's not about loving or hating or trying to get him or not trying to get him a normal father that believes in that believes in G believes in shabas and koser and he sees his son not doing it a normal father there's different ways of how to approach it there's different ways of how to say it but a normal father is going to try to make sure his kids gets the best in life so I said to him like this I said I'm not telling you you should listen to your father I'm not tell you to listen to him I said I I said I'm sure it's not easy in your house he goes yes it's not easy in my house so I said I just want to make you a happier person I told him I said how when your father tells you these things I'm not telling you you should listen I can't tell you not to listen it's tell how can I tell them not to listen right I said but understand that it's not coming from a bad place it's not coming from a bad place I told him I said go into your room close the door I'm going tell you to laugh but just for your sake what's the point of getting to an argument with him or fight with him back you don't he doesn't see your point you don't see his point but know at least it's coming from a good place that's what he believes so normal father is going to tell you he thinks his son is about to get hit by a car he's going to get he's going to intervene he gets out of the car I said was it okay what I told you he goes 100% it was okay no problem he gets out of the car a month later rash was actually earlier that year I think it like SE September 7th I think I met him August 7th and this happened on September 7th or 8th and I'm standing outside I live by Beach 9th Street by the beach over there you know by those 10 houses by seagert and I'm standing outside talking to a c of mine and it was Tash it was Tash time and my by my house Tash everyone from all it was a nice day everyone was coming to Tash thousands of people L this one that people with dogs and cats and ferrets everybody's going to t with their animals whatever they're do it was like M that's what it looked like they're all going to T and I'm standing there talking to somebody and I hear a voice somebody calls calls to me from across the street he goes Rabbi walking he was standing with with another boy with a dog they come across the street and he tells me Rabbi do you recognize me I go um no and he wasn't wearing a ponytail he wasn't wearing a nose ring he wasn't wearing an earring I did see some tattoos coming out of his shirt he was wearing white shirt actually it's funny and the buttons were open and he tells me you don't remember me I go no he goes you were the person that gave me the lift a month ago so I said wow I said I don't know I said I'm not taking credit for what happened to him I'll tell you that right now but he tells me he says I want to tell you something Rabbi he says to me when you picked me up and you spoke to me from the moment I got out of your car till today R I did not have one argument with my father because of what you told me this is what he tells me so I said to that's incredible I said how does that I feel he goes I'll be very honest with you feels amazing I said my relationship with my father got better my relationship with with Hashem got better because my relationship my father got better and I didn't want to take any credit for this that's not what this about CU I'm sure he had a journey in that month but I said to him I said it feels good he goes yes so the lesson that I learned was so valuable and the valuable lesson that I learned was I want to explain something to you I'm not telling you you're on the kidss level I'm not telling you father's on the other level I need you to understand something about about yish K and about Judaism rabim parents no rebi walks into Yeshiva I don't care what you tell me no teacher walks into a classroom with the mindset of hurting another kid emotionally nobody starts off like that could be a lot of things happen in between where a Reby already looks at a kid a certain way or a teacher already has a you know prenot of what this kid is all about and he might even pick on the kid sometimes when the kid is not at fault but if the kid's at fault 99% of the time then it's normal for a teacher to say oh here here he's doing this again so my point is that rabim when they come to Yesa even if they give you muser even if they send you home for a week even if they nobody wants to send the kid home nobody believe me I promise you every kid that would behave in a classroom I'm telling you now I guarantee you that eventually the re's going to start leaving you alone if you don't have a reputation for sure he's not even going to start up with you if you do and I'll tell you I was dealing with a bunch of kids I was do with a bunch of kids this year and a particular kid actually that you might know and we had a conversation and the conversation was really a basic ABC kind of conversation which is if the Yeshiva doesn't want you to do something and you want to be in that Yeshiva like in a business if you have if somebody has a business and and the person in the business wants to run the business a certain way but you don't agree with the way he wants to run the business so you have two options either you'll get fired eventually or go to another job but you can't you can't just do whatever you want if the owner of the business is running it a certain way so if the business doesn't want you to do something and you want to be here you have to whether you agree or not you have to follow directions so very important in any aiva you go to and any Yeshiva you go to it's very important to realize that yeshivas are there for you and I want to tell you them this is amazing what's going on here it's really amazing what's going on and I'm very impressed and it looks like you guys are are most of you I don't know all of you but you could see a are absorbing I don't know if it's the love of the RAB I'm sure it's that love of T the love of learning whatever it is you're understanding that people are here for you people are here for you and this goes on for any Yeshiva on any level and any age when you understand that authority figures rabim teachers parents even Elder brothers and sisters I I you know I'm not going to put them in the same boat cuz they might have ulterior motives but any parent if you're behaving and you're doing what you should be doing pretty much are going to treat you a certain way and Raba the same thing I'm sure if you're learning Stark or you're following the rules of a Yeshiva and you're doing what you should be doing I am sure you will not be getting into trouble with the on H I can almost guarantee that okay there's nobody that walks wakes up in the morning like I said a rebi that says I want to make my kids miserable I want to make myself miserable I want to yell I want to scream I want to be I want to get kids in trouble I just think it's a very important Concept in life in life and the most important thing I want to tell you is that you're here for your benefit people don't have that a rebi or a teacher is there to give you guidance is there to help you in your future is there to actually make sure that one day you leave here wherever it is wherever you are and have a future for yourself so not every re is the same I won't say that not every teacher is the same not every parent is the same but the same goal is to give you what you need to move on in life and I think it's very very important that you understand this concept and regarding learning especially okay now that's the story with that I want to tell you a very nice Marshall I saw there was once a man that was walking in na in a forest in a forest in a park and he saw a bunch of leaves that were flying around and were the wind was blowing them around now this yes it's not a true story cuz he started talking to the leaves now maybe for you it may be normal but it's not it's a mush okay and he asked the leaves why are you all excited why are you all jumping why are you all excited so the Le leaves said don't you understand we were once trapped and stuck on that old rickety tree over there and he point they pointed to a tree their stem pointed to a tree we were went stuck to that tree and now we finally got detached and we're we're able to go whever we want to go we can go we're free to go where we want that's why we're excited we're able to see the world we're able to fly wherever we want now okay few days later few days later he sees he sees he comes back to the St Park he looks on the floor and he sees that all the leaves are brown and they they're lifeless they're dead but there was a few of them that still had some green color to them which means they would still have some some life to them so we asked one of the green leaves he said what happened to all that excitement and all that every wow and all of a sudden now you're all dead over here so the green leaf said you don't understand we thought that while we were attached to this tree we're we're inhibited we can't do what we want we have we're forced to do things we have to stay on this tree we're not interested it's an old rickety tree it does what is it that's not even beautiful anymore in their eyes now we realize that the only nutrition and the only life that we have is when we're attached to this tree when we're attached to this tree we have sustenance we're alive once we get detached we you think you're free we thought so and we're not we ended up dying Within a few days the Torah teaches us I need to explain this to you people think the Torah is oldfashioned some people think that way sadly oh the Torah doesn't understand today's society the Torah is an old rickety tree it doesn't understand it doesn't understand the pleasures it's never been out there it's only sitting on shelves and the reame that study it only know it's on that shelf but you have to understand he it's the tree of life and the tree to that gives you sustenance and those that are those that still attach themselves will always get the sustenance they need and those that are not attached to it will not get that sustenance so we need to understand the value of what it means the old what they call the old rickety tree or the old school or the old way of doing things and I'm sure nobody here has that issue but you got to trust the process you got to trust the process you know I started learning with a B I'm not going to mention his name obviously but I started learning with B I think it was maybe in September August August he went to yiva nville in August this guy if I tell you was trouble it was insane how much I've never met and I met some very interesting kids in my life this guy had such anger issues it was insane he actually would walk around with BB guns and and knives and he he would slash tires if somebody if somebody actually drove next to his father's car and and parked it and whatever he would just slash the tire straight up slash him so this guy was completely was completely out of control and I'm thinking to myself what am I going to do to help this guy now his parents called me up his parents called me up and said Rabbi you know you're close with the family can you help my son so and I did this for free I'm going to be honest I did not ask for any money and I never do it's a known thing I will never ever you even wanted to pay me once when I came here I said there's nothing in it I got it anyway um that's why you War for it I got it anyway but I will tell you that I'm telling you now I will learn with anyone I will spend if if any of you really want to learn you call me up and say Rabbi do you have time tonight I'll make it my I'll find time because it's not about me it's not about me it's about me giving what I believe hasm wants me to do and I owe Hashem my life and I bar if I have a gift or a knowledge and I can share it that's what you do to somebody that you care about so I started learning with this guy and the the change that I've seen in him and I will tell you this I learn with him from 3:00 in the morning every Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday not obviously Friday in jais I learn them at 3: in the morning till 5: cuz he's in Eric and I'm in America and I go to sleep at around 2: so I sleep for an hour from 2:00 to 3: and I don't even sleep in my room I sleep in a different room because I'm learning I'm talking to him on the phone and my whole family sleeping so I even sleep with the light on so I should make sure I get up from two: to three and then I then from five o'clock already I'm pretty much I might try to fall asleep for an hour but then I got to take my son at 6 7:00 to Yeshiva depends on the day so I sleep two two three hours a day and that's the truth that's the most and I'm pretty hyper if you notice I am hyper because I I I I live I live and yes you can get you know adrenaline a person has adrenaline when he's going on a big trip the day before if you look at life like it's a big trip and you could able to yeah the people I remember when I was in Yesa we would go to sleep sometime when I was learning I would go to sleep when I was in the mood you know I was in in the zone I would go to see at 2 3 in the morning and everyone here that's ever been in Yesa could attest and get up 6 7 o'clock I would get up for sh so 6 7 o'cl so I would see maybe 4 hours at night and but the excitement of the of the learning and the Torah that you learned really you get you enjoy something you'll stay up if you you have the passion you'll stay up so this kid really really did you know Chang my life around he really did and I want to tell you I've been doing ker for I know 30 something years I was a Reby for 20s something years and I will tell you that I almost feel literally like when I was back in the days of Yeshiva from this boy from this boy has given me such and that's what keeps me motivated to keep learning with him because I benefit as much as he benefits from me to a certain degree and the one thing that I benefited is to work on myself and this is very important is to really believe Hashem exists and it's not simple it's not a simple thing I want to tell you something a VBA now normally I make jokes and that's what he thought he even he even said to me just shut the thing off but you know what this time for jokes but this 's also to understand cuz I think you might benefit more from from a from a depth of understanding something I'm start with this actually I want to what what time do we have by the way you can be honest 5 10 minutes yeah okay I want to tell you something fascinating you're never going to hear this from a rabbi probably and they probably don't even a lot of them don't even mention because I don't think they think about it but it's not a bad thing it's not you know they think about learning I'll think about hash or different different people you know Hashem created the world 5,784 four years ago six wow I'm way off 86 years ago I'm behind the schedule um huh yeah very good four so um and um I want to tell you we know as Jews that Hashem created this world that amount of time ago that's what we're taught as in Judaism right and we know that that's what we know as Jews but in reality we know that hasm existed forever whatever that means I'm not going to go with there but let's just use a number of trillions and trillions of years it's very fascinating this I want you to hear this and all of a sudden after trillions of years Cav I know it's infinite but Cav trillions and trillions and trillions of years Hashem all of a sudden said you know what I'm going to make a world I'm going to make a world I'm bored I've been here for so long I've been here for trillions infinite amount of years I want to make a world I want to make a world and this world that I'm going to make I'm going to create little people that are the size of I don't even know it like like nothing we almost don't exist that's the truth in the big picture compared to the greatness of hasm we don't exist and he says I'm going to create these people and you know what I'm going to do I'm going to give them a gift called my T I'm going to give them the Torah a gift that I had hidden for 6,000 years before I don't know what that means even and I'm going to give it to them and they're going to serve me and they're going to dve to me and I'm going to love it so I have some news for you I want to tell you something very powerful no one's going to tell you this I know no one's going to tell you this but I don't mind telling it to you Hashem does not need our doing I'm telling you right now Russia Shana when we go to SCH on Russia Shana you think Hashem needs you to make him the king think about this you're the king you're the king you're the king we're not even aashu not we're nothing T away now you'll hear the ending of this Hashem doesn't need your Hashem wants your and let me tell you the difference between the two Hashem doesn't need little things that he created to say you're the king you're the king you're the king you're the king he knows he's the king what do you what are you waking him up something he doesn't know the answer is we can't understand this but Hashem wants to be what's called a mative and a mative means hasem for whatever reason this I can't explain I don't know he wants to give and he wants to give and he wants to his creation to be happy that I believe so what does he do he says you know what I have to do I have to give the Jewish people laws because if they follow these laws it means they earned the reward I'm going to give them and why he wants that I don't have an answer completely for that why he wants that but he wants to be good to everyone in the world he wants to be good to all of you but he says like this if you come to me on rashash and you make me the Mel you make me the king and you keep saying you're the king you're the king you're the king you're the king you know what that means that means if he's the king what are we we're his subjects and if we are his subjects what does a subject have to do listen to the king when you listen to the king what can the king do for you he can reward you so Hashem forces us in a way because he loves us like that father that forces or to make us realize to make us realize that you're you're not going to maybe do it on your own so I'm going to force you to come different times of the year to do different things so that you could get close to me you get close to me you do what I want you do what I want I could reward you so like the shim says says the ab want he wants this I don't know again I don't know everything obviously but we do know he wants to be good to us he wants us to to be to enjoy his presence but he sometimes has to force us you know shabus if somebody doesn't keep shabus the punishment of certain Mitzvah or non doing certain Mitzvah or going against it are is are greater in certain things some of them are Misa some of them are malus some of them death some of them why does hasem give you these punishments want not because he wants to hurt you because if you know the punishment of this is so great you might not you might not do it and if you don't do it and you follow what he says he can reward you again in other words everything that we have in the Torah everything we have in Judaism is for one reason and one reason only is is that Hashem wants us to earn the reward he wants us to get close to him we get close to him we could benefit we benefit he's happy I don't have an answer why he's happy but that's what I do know so mitv and every time that you stop yourself from eating let's say not Kosher every time you you control yourself you're making Hashem happy but in essence you're only making him happy because he wants to reward you for the good that you do so I know this is not the speech that Rabbi P had in mind but I want to leave you with one thing I told War a very powerful thing there was a b in Yeshiva that was doing that was doing a um a very long long doing and I don't know what long doing means I'm sure in Europe the longer doing is a lot longer than you think I'm not sure but he's having a long doing and he saw noticed this B was doing this for a long time that he was ding long and walked over to him after a few days and told him like this was the mash in Thea and then in pish and he said to him he says I love the way you're doing and I'm very impressed but I just want to make sure one thing that in your doing at least have a little bit of the in your daving now what does he mean by that a person could go through life learning wearing sors doing mitzvos going to Yeshiva going to DFI having to go to sh to Long DAV yipper oh my God long daving and and he can actually do it and actually actually be happy but he could lose the most important element which is that there's Hashem in this world and Hashem you get close to Hashem when you do this but when you do it understand that you're doing it for the right reasons understand why you're doing it because that makes you're doing it even a greater enjoyment it makes you actually get close to the reason why you're doing it the reason why you're doing it and then you get close to the person that gave you the joy that because you did it so when you have a joy from following certain mitzvos you're going to get close to the person that gave you those mitzvos because he gave you the opportunity to enjoy see automatically you get close so I just want to tell you something I know I make a lot of jokes and I usually do but I just felt like I said I told this boy changed me a lot he really did and it made me wake up to realize whether there was an October 7th or whether doing this and I love him all and should be watch over all of clly and every Y is important every is Holy but you also can't forget about yourself too you can't forget about yourself too you're so busy thinking about other people you're forgetting about your own mission your own spirituality I was in Eric twice in the last 2 and A2 months and you know what I did stay in the Citadel I did this guy's a wealthy kid he did his mother asked me he says how much money should I give you spending money I'm sure if I needed $100,000 believe me she even offered me something pay a certain Bill I said the parents I said I don't want to take any money and I didn't take I still don't take any money because I don't want my relationship with him to be tainted by money I really don't I'm sure if I'm in the street maybe I would think twice about it IM I come home and I'm missing actually I'm out of my house but no but but I will tell you that I actually mom realized that you know again I was in The Citadel twice I was telling you for a week and a half I left I normally don't miss yiva was doing it I was there for a week and a half and I was and I and they set me up beautifully I went in business class you know it's a big difference by the way yes have you ever gone business class never has anyone ever gone business class to Israel only wow only for no you own private jet only private jet anyway I will tell you I will tell you that you once you do that you can't even go back to a regular seat and I want to tell you and all I kept remembering when I was there and this is the truth I kept sitting there in this big place to eat and I saw mdash which was right there right there the Mak you can see literally the walls of you don't see the wall you see the walls of the outside I'm thinking to myself here we are sitting in hotels Fring ignoring like we're seeing it to our own eyes and we're losing we're not getting the picture we're not doesn't mean you shouldn't be happy doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy but you got to think a little bit you got to think a little bit so my point to you is I am telling you it's to Big honor that I'm here because I walk around I look around there and I see Mish great kids I'm telling you now this is amazing I'm telling you the truth I look at your faces and I see people that are connected people that want to grow and I give credit to the rabim like I said and I told you it's a big honor to be here it really is I normally do not miss my I always make sure that I give my share and I will tell you that I gave it up to come here because I get I get when I come here I really do I'm looking around look how quiet it is you know honestly a lot of times it's not even quiet and you know what you guys guys are growing and you guys are special but I want you to understand to develop yeah develop a relationship with our KES it sounds like it's not cool it sounds like it's not with it to some of you but the closer you get the more you realize that that tree the is your sustenance the the closer you'll get the closer you'll get the will reward you and I thank you I'm sorry that I'm so serious today but I I am I'm on a journey myself and I will tell you barem I haven't had a bad day B her in the last 6 months not because I haven't had a beard day because I never looked at it as a beard day because I know everything is a challenge and everything is is something hasm is sending you away to see if you'll handle it correctly and the last word I always tell my students it's called ride the wave now what does ride the wave mean a wave sometimes is bigger than other waves there's different types of waves tidal waves and this waves and the Surfers usually like the a good Surfer wants the more challenging wave he'll actually look and see when the when when is the best time the waves are coming in and then he gets on his surfboard and his job is to stay on that surfboard and the and the and the the waves have taken him in all different directions and sometimes he falls but his goal is get back on find the wave and get back no find the wave not run away find the wave and get back on it in life life is a wave Life's a tidle wave sometimes in life we go through a lot of things in our life and our job is to somehow stay as long as we can on that surfboard in life we're going to be faced with challenges ride the wave understand that everything does this for your best and Hashem sends us challenges cuz he knows we can grow from them and we can get closer have a wonderful shabas all of you