CHAZAQ's Torah Talks #174 Rabbi Avraham Garber - Saving American Jewry

what is the factor that makes that's going to make the biggest difference that's going to stop intermarriage and these other problems right education education Jewish Education almost 71% of you went to Day School are or yiva are highly engaged in Jewish life only about half that otherwise so Jewish identity and your really depends upon Jewish Education a full-time Jewish Education [Music] and welcome to Torah talk kazak's program with special guests we have with us our dear friend rabar sh thank you very much for joining us again pleas see okay great we're gonna be speaking about saving American jur but before we get before we get to that topic we get a little background about the rabbi and the great work you're involved with okay so I've been really uh involved in Jewish Jewish Education or really in K was the Jewish as long as can remember uh in high school and college I really got involved so uh I helped start the organization called the Jewish flame where we did kiru uh classes and uh programs and shabat this is where and we started at Columbia University and we went through many all all the major schools in New York and then we branched out we had schools all over the country C we had groups on all these different campuses um so I've been involved in KY Ro and Jewish Outreach for nearly 50 years I'm still teaching classes for the flame wow we used to run these summer programs in uh at NYU and every summer we have a whole like 10 15 different classes going on for summer so we got a lot of people involved andari a lot of people um came back to Judaism at that time um at the same time I was in Columbia Law School and uh after I graduated I started working as a lawyer but I was really unhappy at that and uh I met Rabbi rosenblad satal and I ended up learning at Yeshiva right over here in Queens right the minion Factory well it wasn't a minion Factory then it was a it was a real yiva and uh yeah so and so that's how I got to know the Rosen blats and the Rosen bat family and you know I've been touch we've been close for 44 years already since then um and uh after that I ran a computer software company for about 25 years and then I then taught computer science and math in public schools for 13 years I just retired last this September nice so but uh while I was doing that I also uh for the past five plus five more than five years now I've been ra at cator to go over for Rosen Rosen yes that's all and um and uh and then in the interim I also started uh aru's children so that we started in about 2008 maybe I'll tell the story a little later about how we started it but just um we've gradually been getting the organization helps students who we like the makes the last Hammer blow we give like a little extra money for tuition support and that kind of helps Propel the parents to make them make that crucial decision that they're going to make that take that step and send their children to uh to Yeshiva day school and not to public school so we started with a small number of people and then uh now we've helped uh over a thousand students over that period of time and it's getting more and more partly thanks to I get a testify that kazak and the whole PST team and and everyone we always hear the word the name of the organization AR children they're always supporting and helping Public School uh parents with kids and public schools to make that uh you know help that uh the children transfer to Yesa so uh we're a testimony to that and we're forever grateful and uh wow I I didn't know the rabbi's been involved for over 50 50 years that's amazing so being that the topic is saving American jewy Rabbi what is the current situation uh for Jews in America okay so if you look I I made some charts and if you look at if you look at the chart you'll see that uh this first one's like a Gallop pole so when I was when you know way back in the early 50s so close to 4% of the Jewish population I'm sorry 4% of the American population was Jewish at that time now it's gone gradually down and down now it's under 2 % really of America America in the world we're 0 something per. yes well we were as more significant part of the American population so what's what why is that so um look at the the next chart um shows intermarriage so when I was growing up the intermarriage rate was like uh well if you look at it it talks about intermarriage rate um by when people were married so people that were married before 1970 basically s says 177% uh we intermarriages um by the time I got married it was up to 36% and uh and then it's been gradually growing so now it's uh 58% he so that means that almost three out of every five marriages is an intermarriage and so that so that's a big problem it uh it's really threat it's always been a big threat for American children and it just keeps getting worse and worse and worse so um so so let's look at the breakdown that so I made another chart this is this data is from the Pew research 2020 survey of uh of American of North American Jewelry maybe just American jeury and uh if you notice on that chart what's intermar of Orthodox only 2% intermar cons we would consider that to be a lot conservative 27 reform 50% and non-denominational which is the majority or close to majority of American jewy 69% are that's are interm Maring and so that's and then if you look at the fertility rate and when if they do marry somebody Jewish are they having Jewish children well the Orthodox are the they average 4.1 children per family but uh conservative is under replacement late is about 2.1 you have to replace the father and the mother so they demographers that's what the rate they give for replacing conservatives under replacement right only 1.8 uh reform 1.7 and non donation 1.4 so there's no way that the American population is going to produce enough Jews in upcoming Generations so we have two major problems intermarriage and lack of having Jewish children so that's the kind of situation and besides that we have other problems we have uh what's going on currently is an assault really the secular society's assault on Jewish values as we all deal we dealing with um they have uh the lack of emphasis on family lack of emphasis on Community um on morality on Israel particularly now um the lust and horror the the the slanderous speech that goes on so easily it's so easy today to say to reach a million people and slander a in a huge audience slander a person across the whole world in a matter of seconds the Lush and horror that's going on is staggering um and the lack of emphasis just on study and and Hashem and on God so all these are really an assault on on Jewish values and then of course with the what of course we have the current problem that's gotten worse is just the physical issue of anti-Semitism antisemitism which everybody else is talking about so wow so what role does Jewish Education have in this situation that we're in RightWay so I was always you know when I was younger I was I was the inter marriage was the issue that I was focused on and uh I was trying to always see what is the factor that makes that's going to make the biggest difference it's going to stop intermarriage and these other problems right education education Jewish Education so I I uh got there some I found some very interesting uh statistics that uh illustrate this so there was a study in 2020 by uh by uh in Chicago of the Chicago Jewish population and they actually broke down um their study between those um Jews that had attended day school full-time day schools and those that had not attended day school so if you look at the chart you'll see there's a a significant difference in terms of the attitudes so for example um feel very much part of the worldwide Jewish community so if you didn't attend a day school only 29% feel that way if you attended a day school double 57% feel part how about emotionally attached to Israel if you don't attend a day school only 27% of Jews felt in Chicago felt that they were emotionally attached but if if they did attend 65% that's more than double that's a very big effect going to it's huge and then this has impacts on other aspects of of of life as well you feel people that feel very much that being Jewish is a part of their daily life you didn't go to Day School 29% do go to day school again double 57% feel being Jewish is part of your daily life um how about most of your friends are Jewish 39% said of non people that didn't attend day school but if you attend a day school then 66% of your friends are Jewish on average marry somebody Jewish same idea cons so so highly engaged in Jewish life again almost 71% of you went to Day School are or Yeshiva are highly engaged in Jewish life only about half that otherwise so see just from that that uh Jewish that uh Jewish Education really depends I'm sorry your your Jewish identity and your really depends upon Jewish Education a full-time Jewish Education you know uh another chart here says that what percent attended full-time um Jewish school for at least just one year so 85% of Orthodox attended a Jewish school one year conservative only 31% reform 14% And nonen non- denominational also 14% so the the difference of attending a Jewish school for one year is is huge in terms of uh in terms of where you where you end up falling out um on the spectrum of uh Jewish commitment these charts I want you to know Robie Garber is uh worth thousands of words I see it it's like wow it's unbelievable picture is worth a thousand words they say I took this data and and and and and just compiled the charts myself so um and then the last one here is what percentage of je say religion is what is was important or not important in their life so it's very important Orthodoxy are off the chart right but if it's but uh conservative only 33% consider Judaism very important in our lives and even less if you're a reformer no particular Branch 5% the other way around who says Judaism is not to or not at all important well if you're not denominational 47% say Judaism is not important at all in their lives 53% of Reform say it's not important at all in their lives um it's much better conservatives 20% and Orthodox only four so see that that the uh if we want if we want Jews to survive in to be survive and prosper in in America the diaspora they it there it's not going to work unless they have a full-time Day School Ed yiva education wow wow wow so inspiring and to to to hear all this and the importance in Jewish Education um so one's listening to this how can one get involved in these efforts to help the situation to change these numbers to save moreas and souls and get people closer to God Almighty send them to to inspire them to marry Jewish and things along those lines okay so uh there's many ways um but um the easiest way is just to talk to your colleagues at work you when you when you meet other Jews that are not uh Orthodox or not are not sending their kids that are sending their kids to public school just talk to them about your experiences and uh how important it is and I can tell you a story how we started out just this very way um we had a h a cleaning lady interesting uh from Russia she was an from Soviet Union and uh she was only doing clean because when they come here they don't have the uh they don't have the professional accreditation to work in a professional job so they have to make money in the interim while they're going back to school and getting their credit so they can do so we had a cleaning lady and she wanted and she you know in the Soviet Union her kids they didn't have any in Russia there's no there was no Jewish Education um she brought her kids here and she wanted to have something you know um something more because they felt that this is what was lacking for her in Russia she wanted to them to find out about Judaism and her all her as well so um so we suggested that we would help and then she didn't have any much money so we offered to help support her so she sent her kids to ycq wow and we helped to pay for their tuition okay that was good so then a few years later her sister came over from the Soviet Union and she was going to send her kids to public school and I said uh my wife and I talked to her we said well look at your sister look at her kids you know you should just consider sending your kids to Yeshiva she again said I can't afford s how can we just got here we have no money how can we send our kids to Yesa and we said we'll help you also you should know that today she's got two of her kids are learning in COA and Lakewood wow from fam Grand she's got from grandchildren she said it was like the uh the best thing she ever did so so so we started helping other people so uh and then when since we had a number of these students at ycq so Rabbi loner who was the executive director at ycq Mar dear friend kazak yeah so he um he said you know if you're helping all these people you really it's better if you do it through an organization that's how our jewi that's how our Jewish students started our Jewish children started right wow so this is going back how long ago uh this is almost 20 years ago I think maybe 2006 maybe something like 2007 we formally organized it I think in two 2008 I want to repeat one thing that the rabbi said the importance of speaking to others to family members to friends to neighbors to co-workers as one that's involved in this I've seen numerous times where it was just a small hello how you doing what's going on small discussion oh really they go to public school will they be interested in Isa you should know most people are interested it's just there small Cav that small details are holding back whether it's just not knowing any better whether it's not having the right context whether it's this difference with regards to the tuition that they could afford or they can't afford and thank God we've seen tremendous tremendous amount of children over 1,800 more or less placement tells me at kak that have been transferred every single person watching all over the world can make a difference as well people think you have to be a rabbi you have to be a pure professional let me tell you a story about I'll mention his name is because this person Eugene Horowitz he was the one responsible for Kor having all the different Min all he suggested it to Rabbi rosenblat but he's not just he he's a person who who gets involved so he know knew this person that was working in Queens mother um and she was sending your kids to public school and he pestered her so why are you sending your kids to public school they could have such a they could have such a beautiful Jewish Education if you send them to a Jewish school but you know she said no we can't afford it and he but he didn't give up this went on for not just one year two years three years but and and she told me about her and we spoke to her but but eventually he wore her down and she agreed she sent one I think one kid started out we've been supporting them ever since and now all her kids are getting a Jewish Education that is so inspiring so nice to know what Mr has besides for all theor which I a very big uh fan of because of my crazy schedules and I have to be Here There and Everywhere so besides for that but to to to save these nishas that's very very very very inspiring very inspiring also you can do is you can support organizations 100% if you can get involved with your time funding is always needed to support great causes our Jewish children kazak there's many other great organizations that are involved with helping get Jewish kids into Jewish Day schools uh and I'd add one more thing is that you can learn with somebody there's organizations like Partners in Torah Torah mates EMT Outreach and many of you can just go and learn with somebody and when you learn with then you develop a personal relationship with them then you can also have an impact 100% we also have hundreds of different options as well besides for those amazing relation that RAB Garber mentioned uh time you know everybody has most find that I think out of the best you know what he said it just like we have to give Myer which is 10% of our funds towards Sak towards uh charity uh he suggested that people should give uh Myer of their time as well spend some time help organizations and and and teach others that are less fortunate and you know something interesting people think oh you're I'm doing a favor by teaching somebody else many many many times I hear from the re from the mentors that they benefit more than because they prepare and they learn and they have questions isn't pery obious that you learn the most from your students oh absolutely yeah so very very very important very very true uh Robbie Garber I'm enjoying every single moment this is music to my ears this is what we live live for but we have a custom my final message on our kak Tor talks okay so I think one thing we can take from this the main thing is that the the main factor in Jewish identification for your children if you want to have Jewish grandchildren then you have to give them a full full day Jewish Education right not uh you know not afternoon schools but it's got to be that's got to be the S of the ier and the essence and I think I can give a darar Tor I think that uh that that really right from this week's para actually so um we so in this week's P we have the story of stone and the destruction of stone and lo is living in stone and lo is is told that the stone was going to be destroyed and to save his family so L goes out to uh his daughters who are married and his sons-in-law so the PK says L went out and spoke to his sons-in-law and then it says lo who literally means who took his daughters and he says get Get Up Stand Up and get out of this place Hashem is going to destroy the city what was their reaction it was like a joke they laughed this is like silliest thing they ever heard okay so the question in the PK is if we know that there it says there he he spoke to his sons-in-laws sons-in-law and then Lo BOS we the people that took his daughters well we know the sons-in-laws took is a Hebrew word for marriage we know the sons-in-laws married the daughters why does they have to repeat it good question what is being added from Lo Bosa right all right so so Rob Shimon rafio HS gives a very interesting answer I think that's a sh that's really relevant to what we're doing here so um he says that the Torah is talking about that literally taken his daughters what does it mean they took his daughters they weren't conventional son-in-laws because their values and their Outlook in life was the values of the city of stone corrupted and so they took their daughters they took their daughters to their Outlook which was so different than the Outlook of L and certainly of L's uh AB aindo lot's uncle right so they couldn't really fit in with the family of Abraham's nephews so they were just takers of his daughters they weren't just sons-in-laws they were takers of his daughters and that's why they thought L was it was a joke when L came in and tried to convince them that the city was going to be destroyed but in contrast aam was very very concerned about the morals and values that would be transmitted to his grandchildren so when he wanted to marry we read in uh two weeks when he wanted to marry uh get get a daughter a wife rather for his son Yak so he made sure that elezar he made him make an oath that he would uh find somebody who would have the same basic values of ethics and morality and that was the key point so H was writing in the 19th century and and apparent and there was a much assimilation going on in Germany in the 19th century and he said what was going on in stone the same the same shortcomings that Afflicted Lo's sons-in-law was going on in Germany at that time the values that there were that was prevalent at that time um was was directly influencing the the Jews and so many Jews were assimilating in Germany in the 19th century you say the same thing today just like uh our time is no different we have the same the values of the values of stone in our society the our secular values are they going to become the values of our of our children and then our grandchildren they can't that they can't straight to they can't St uh stay true to Judaism if they are so we have to be like arino we have to be like steadfast in our values and not assume that we can remain isolated from the values of the society around us and the the really the only way to do that is prioritize living in an environment of Torah and having our children living and growing and learning an environment of Torah and that can only be accomplished in a Jewish school so we should hope that we can uh that we'll find husbands for our daughters and and and wives for our sons in the there'll be genuine sons and daughters and not like Lo with they're Lo they're takers of our children but they'll be generally sons-in-laws and daughters-in-laws and that way we can join in the common Heritage of abam ainu so that would be the party message I would leave amazing party message very very very inspiring Robbie Garber uh powerful points Mar ladies and gentlemen ever wherever you are around the world let's share this message to the family friends neighbors co-workers everyone you know uh send this out share the link and uh and and let everyone know the importance of a Jewish ucation every single Jewish child deserves Jewish ucation no child should be left behind we're on a mission and we want to save every single n every single soul let's continue the amazing uh Heritage and and and you know the Judaism that we have and we're going to stay strong I want to thank the rabbi for all that you do for all of we're forever grateful thank you for having me it's been a pleasure working with you all these years and we want to remind everyone every single Tuesday night 8:30 p.m. Eastern Standard time we have kak Torah talks with special guests and so many so much feedback that we get it's it's it really feels good you know knowing that you know everywhere I go people are sto me and saying that listen to this episode and this Rabbi and this Torah talk in this class in this lecture we're forever grateful we appreciate it uh suggestions for future guests are always welcome uh send us some feedback info at k.org info chq.org sponsorship and dedications are also available in the beginning of each episode we have dedications feel free to reach out for that as well and we shall all be we shall all Merit in the Merit of all the Cure and all the holy work that's going on we should be able to have the complete Redemption thank you very much behind the camera the entire kak team and staff and board members and supporters we're forever grateful that was really nice [Music]