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Charlie Harary - Tisha B'av 2026

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Welcome to the Kazak Tisha Marathon where every year we get together to tap into the power of of this very very powerful day. We we learn about what destruction is and how we can rebuild towards rebuilding the beta mikdash. We want to thank Beth Gabriel for hosting and partnering on on the on this annual event. It's been so many years, I think decades of this of this annual event that has inspired hundreds of thousands of people all over the world and um and hundreds of people, thousands of people join us right over here in person and and of course thanks to our friends at Tor anytime for for partnering and streaming this event. So many thousands of people benefit. So of course we thank all the the Rabonim and the lay leadership of Beth Gabriel for for for for partnering on this annual event. And of course, we thank our friends at Torah Anytime for being such great great partners with Khazak for so many years. And of course, we know Torah Anytime is spreading Torah. They they they do what their namesake says. They spread Torah at any time of the day, anywhere, all over the world. So, we thank our partners at Tory anytime and uh and we have the great honor to hear tonight from Mr. Charlie Arari tonight and and throughout the entire day tomorrow starting all the way from from 10 10:20 a.m. till 7:30 p.m. There's going to be over 20 different speakers every half hour giving the giving the inspiration so that we don't just go through the the the fast, but we grow through it and we tap into the to to the meaning of the day and and we encourage everyone to join us in person right here at Beth Rio 663500 East Street in Forest Hills. And of and if anyone can't join us in person, of course, share at the link to you should watch online. Share at the link kazak.org/live. CH hazq.org/live org/live or torrenime.com/cazaklive torrentime.com hazql i v e to time.com/cazak live and the call-in number is 605605222 extension46 again the number write it down 605605222 extension 46 tonight's being dedicated by the Nazara family they've been great partners on the on the annual tishov program they're dedic ating in memory of Esther Batsara Nazarov and Rifkov lead Batsara and it's being dedicated tonight by the begun family ben Alexander Zisha on on his 33rd yard site tonight on tishab and and of course it's one of the largest tishab programs all over the world and thousands of people are being inspired tonight and of course tomorrow and everyone can can be can be partners with kazak on this program and you and if you um if you go right now on give kazak com. You can um you could dedicate a name for Kaishmas in memory of someone for for Shalma. You could dedicate a name at give kazak.com and and uh you could definitely be part of this this um this this program. And and every year right now we're starting everyone's sitting on the floor and and we're wondering as we start the fast day, why are we sitting on the floor? Why are we fasting? Wh what's destruction? What is mourning all about? And how can we relate to it? So I think Rabbi you did he said a powerful insight that I think that that I think we can give some insight into he said if you look back and where does destruction start doesn't start with the beta the beta mikdash it starts when when when you look at the story of the spies so what happens they go out and they they go out and they see the land and and and what did they do that was so wrong they that Mosher Rabenu said you can go and look at the land so what did they come back they said that there's giants there and and they they describe fortified cities but so what was So wrong. So the Ramban said says that that there was one word that that that was the root of destruction. They said the word effes it's impossible. We cannot conquer the land. There's no way it is possible. And and and that is why that that's the root of destruction. When you do not believe in yourself and and even if there's a challenge that comes your way, but you have to but you have to believe in yourself that that Hashem put you, Hashem is going to give you the strength and and the the kak to to over to overcome that. And of course everyone everyone in their lives they have they they have a challenge with their family with their friends with their amuna whatever it may be and they have we everyone has to believe in themsel and there's also another pak says says vi esh hada that says mori he brought up Esther had the name for Esther and and that that's a simple interpretation that that he raised her but but a deeper interpretation rather says is that that mort believed in Esther. He he had that amuna in Esther and that's why she became successful. And we we know that that that if in parenting if you want to have successful children, you want to have successful students, you have to believe in them. And in order for them to be successful, they believe in themselves, then they can accomplish with Hashem. And that's what Kazak's core mission is is is is to inspire thousands of public school students through through through after school programs in over 20 different locations and has transferred over 2,500 students from public school to yeshiva. But it's with it's by focusing on each and every child to believe in each and every student to see their success. So this dish we have to take upon oursel that we have to believe in oursel we have to believe in those around us in order for them to be successful. And of course we have the school year coming up in just a month. So we should reach out to Kazak and car believe in the children that Kazak believes in and reach out to Kazak and and um somebody who's on that who's who's one of the leading forces behind Kazak's revolution is the CEO and founder of Kazak that's called Pon Rab. >> Wow. >> Thank you Robbie. 1,958 years since the qurban, the destruction of bet mikdashenu, our holy temple, the beta mikdashu. So you might think we're still sitting on the floor. We're still mourning for something that didn't even happen in our generation. It's not our fault, you might think. But the shami tells us every single generation that the bet the mikdash is not rebuilt. It's as if it was destroyed. That means it's not their fault. It's our fault. That means we still have to work on what? What was the reason the last bet was destroyed? Was because of because of basis hatred. So there's a suggestion. I had this to go around to many places to give shim. And the suggestion is working. People reaching out to me. They're like, "Ah, I feel so good." I told people right now people might have someone that don't go along with for whatever reason now to mend ways and to make peace and to go and sit down it's not so simple they tell me so I told them how about this idea to tell yourself it takes two to fight right if one is not fighting there's no fight you know you to to clap your hands if you only have one hand uh and the other is not around you're not able to make any noise there's no So one suggestion is for every single one of us internally to forgive and to forget whoever the individual was whoever he did whatever happened she did he said she said whatever the story is to say like we say whatever they did forgive and forget this is what a person is supposed to be doing as yet every single night before we go to sleep when a person hates it should be known that the one that hates the one that's holding the grudge the one that has that that that's that's upset is one that has sleepless nights and anxiety and issues and problems and stress. So let's just for one moment before we call upon the guest speaker for tonight take this upon ourselves to forgive to forget shalom to make peace and by us doing this small action of loving freely one another hopefully we hope and we prayain enough to our suffering all of our suffering is because we know the mdash the complete redemption what we all have to do. Especially over here in this community, we have a big job of love our fellow like I love ourselves. Just like you're sitting over here listening to a class and you're going to grow and you're going to change. There's thousands of people that don't know what it is at all to be connected. Thousands as Robbie just mentioned. Join the Kazak revolution. Be part of it. Look at two brothers to brothers who were from public school. Imagine they would have still been in public school. And many of you I see around the room were former public school students at Kazak and Barak. You're sitting over here. You're growing. You're changing. Your lives are better. Don't just care about three people. Me, myself, and I. Get other people involved as well. Go care for others. Go save another soul. Everyone sitting over here and everyone watching online, every all over the world, everybody knows somebody, a family member, a friend, a neighbor, a co-orker, a former classmate, whatever the story is. I have kids in public schools. Public school is not a place for your Jewish child. We need to save them right now before the September school year. Get involved. Reach out. If you can't for whatever reason, do it. Get involved another way with your time. You can't with your time, get involved with your monetaries, with your money. Money. Every year when we start here, we try to go back into the same story we tell every single year and try to find something new, something different. You know, it's like when you're trying to get an answer right on the test. So, you get the same fact pattern and if you don't get an A or you don't pass, you keep on going back and back and back and hopefully you'll find something new each year. So, we should have the this year, I hope to hear something from Hashem throughout the whole. Hopefully, from now to tomorrow night, we can hear something whatever it is that we're doing and engaged in that will hopefully be the right answer. And the test is this here. And I hope Hashem will look down and see us and be able to make this the last year. Tonight's classes you may have heard already from the different classes is really coming from conversations and teachings from Myra Verb Levy. A lot of what all of what you're going to hear tonight is based on those conversations. If you hear it and you like it, the credit goes to him. And if you don't, the fault is mine. You know, when you look at the stories of of the Midbar, you'll find something amazing. If we would have to take a test and try to and try to count or prioritize what the worst of the things the Jews did wrong in the Midbar. And if I would just put three on the top number one, Moshe goes up to Shmayim to get the Torah at Hari. It's not even two years later. It's at the mountaintop or at the bottom of the mountain. And Mosha goes, "I'm I'm coming back in 40 days." And he's not late like two weeks. He's late at night. The miscalculation of when he comes back is like, "It's the half a day. It's the full day. It's it's so short. He's a couple he's going to heaven." Like even if you take the Bell Parkway, people understand he's going to be late. Like him saying he's going he's from Egypt. You know this is Friday time. Like okay, give him a a drop. He's he's late one night. By the time he comes down, the Jewish people decide that in the one day that they don't have Moshe, they made an egg at the at the mountain. The Gomorrah says, the Gamarra wastes no time like a Zara. Hashem from Shay goes through go down. Later on, the Jews are at the banks. Bilam is trying to curse the Jews and Hashem is outplaying him. He tells Balak, if you want to get the Jews to really fight far be far from Hashem, you got to bring in the ladies of Midan in because Hashem hates Zim. He hates Nus. Men and women are supposed to be he hates when people don't appro don't act with the level of respect. And the Jews engage not only innus but in Aonazara and a plague breaks out. Number three, Hashem says, "You're going into Cananan. Men, women, and children, imagine if right now the rabbi gets up and claps in the beam and says, "Uh, men, uh, ladies and gentlemen, the Americans are really having a hard time in Iran right now. They need some backup. The Marines are really, really exhausted. Go call your wives. Take the kids out of camp. We're going to Thrron. You'll be like, I don't think my wife I mean, if it's if it's 69, I'm freaking out. You know what I'm talking about? Like I I don't No, we're not going to make it. My kids are for sure not they're not going to make the flight to Thran, let alone fighting. Are you kidding me? That was That's on the table now. Taking the kids with the little the little Kindle across the border to fight what? Giants, walled cities. And the leaders who are the response the rabbis who know the little kids who bar mitzvah the boys who knows about the couple they were the msado kaducian under the wedding at THAT COUPLE THEY KNOW THEY'RE NOT GOING IN. THERE'S NO WAY THEY'RE GOING TO fight and they go check it out. They come back and listen I got to tell you something. These are massive walls. Like I don't know if you understand. We don't have drones. How are we going to get over THESE WALLS? AND BY THE WAY these fruits and there's funerals everywhere. Like are you kidding me? Like we know the people. These are not the these people were just a minute ago in in the in Egypt being broken under slavery. We're not talking about a nation that have been warriors. This isn't Sparta. It ain't going to happen. A votara under hari. Avodara and Zema. And we're just too scared. The first one, Hashem says, "You'll make it through." The second one, Hashem says, "It plague, but you'll make it through." And the third one, Hashem says, "You did what?" You were scared. Destruction. Seem fair? Seem like it matches. If you'd have to choose what would be the worst sin, would that be on number one or would that be number three? Seems like Hashem doesn't think so. Why? One more and then we'll start to delve in. If this question sounds familiar, I got it. Stick with me. We're asking the same question every year. Hopefully, we'll have a different angle. Thanks to the rabbi. The Gumar says, the Gar says what happened in Sheni? They were actually doing everything. They came to shul they went to class. They did like check check. Why did they get destroyed? Because of Wait a second. They're doing Torah, mitzvah, and what are we talking about? Bikishon had some big sins. We got that back to Sheni because they weren't getting along and they're doing everything right and we don't. So, let's delve a little bit. I want to talk to you a little bit. You've heard this a little bit before, but again, stick with me, please. I want to talk to you a little bit about reality. One of the greatest mistakes that we make in life is that what we think when we go through life is that we think that we are engaged in a process of us understanding reality. Let me just explain you a little bit. One of the greatest gifts Hashem has given us as people is he puts over our brains we call it's called in science a schema. We'll call it a filter. And what that is is when me and you engage in the world, the amount of stimuli that come at us is so so much. When you walk into a supermarket, the amount of things, noises, and sounds and sights that come into your mind, there are millions of stimul. When you're driving in a highway, there are millions of stimuli that are coming at you. Signs and roads and cars. when you walk the streets of Queens or anywhere you are if you're especially if you're New York the amount I was one time on the phone with someone on a conference call and I was walking from Grand Central Station to my office and the guy is like are you still alive I'm like what are you talking about he's like I heard like four ambulances a helicopter and a million people like how did you survive I'm like I don't even know what you're talking about the amount of stimuli if me and you would walk through the streets with the stimuli and our brains would be open to take it in we would melt We couldn't drive because the amount of information would come into our brains and melt us. If I would be able to walk the streets and every time I walk the streets, everything hits my mind at the same time, I wouldn't know what to do throughout the day because I'm so busy processing millions and millions of inputs of data. I would literally just collapse. So what Hashem gives us is something in our minds that is like a filter and what it does it's called the schema. What it does is it looks it's an amazing gift and for a second if we do nothing if we just appreciate the borum for a second just appreciate the things that we have. What it does is in our minds our brains are built to process things without it telling our conscious mind. It's incredible. So, if you're in a supermarket and there's somebody with a squeaky wheel two aisles down, your ear hears it, and it immediately asks, "Is it relevant? Is it dangerous?" That squeaky wheel is not relevant or it comes into your ear, but your brain automatically says nothing and it doesn't go into your brain. It's incredible. You'll walk the streets and thousands of things will come into your ears and nothing will go into your brain because your brain will your brain will go dangerous relevant. You're driving a car and it's all gone. You don't remember one car and all of a sudden YOU SEE A CAR JUST LIKE YOURS RELEVANT. YOU'RE LIKE, "HEY, I GOT A CAR like that." Or some cars going a little bit more swerving than they should. You're like, "Uhoh." But all the cars you don't even remember. You ever get to work and you get to work and you're like, "How did I even get here?" You ever had that? Like I woke up like how did I get to my I I don't remember any of it. You ever dabbed on and you're like I don't know if you know that's why Marita it go drives us nuts cuz WE'RE LIKE I DON'T KNOW WHY WE'RE GOING TO ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'm out to lunch by MARITA LIKE NOW WE'RE LIKE DON'T FORGET WHAT we're copy and copy and clapping on. Why? Cuz once you hit IT YOUR BRAIN I GOT IT. SEE YOU. Because your mind the gift that your mind has and stick with me because this is not we're talking about tishabove. Just stay one more minute with me. The bra the gift of our minds is that our mind is looking at the world through a filter and that filter is helping us live. Which means that me and you have never once ever experienced reality because what we're experiencing is just a small bit of it. So for you who drives a white car, you picked up the car that's white. And if I drive a black car, I picked up the car that's black. So the two of us are driving on the same highway looking at a different reality because our brain didn't bring to us all the inputs, only the inputs that are relevant to us. So if I walk into a room and I'm the caterer of something, I'm looking at every little thing. You walk into room as a guest, you have no idea that that thing in the corner is broken and I got to fix it. And oh my gosh, the food is coming late. And I'm panicking. You're like, "Well, everything's amazing." Cuz the two of us are looking at the same room, but we have two different filters on. And the greatest mistake we make is thinking that I see reality because no human being on planet Earth could possibly see reality. All they see is a perception of reality based on what they think is relevant and they think is dangerous. And that is how life processes. Which is why when there are kids that have what's called sensory processing disorder and they walk into a supermarket, they're overwhelmed and they melt down because they don't process everything as quickly as us. Every one of us is born with a Yatesara. This is all from the RAV. A Yateserhara. We think the Yatesahara is on our shoulder whispering to us with a little devilish thing on his side. The Yates, you know, where he lives mostly in something called Nia. Nia is basically the filter. If I want something or don't want something, the Yateshara, if he wants us to do things, he doesn't whisper and go, "Go violate the will of Hashem." Come on. He's the He's the best in the business. He's not some dude friend. The Atara just makes our vision aligned with something. We think it's us. We think it's reality. I'll walk in and go, I can't believe this person is so religious. They're so fanatical. That's not me. And the intro is like, perfect. That's not you. I'll walk in and somebody doesn't say hello in the right way. And all of a sudden, by the time I leave the room, I've concocted a hole. Does she not appreciate me? When last year when I her birthday, I called her. It's her like, "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Look at that." All right, perfect. Yet Zahara lives in Nigia. That's why the Sadikin were so careful for favors. Because they were so worried that if I you gave me a favor, it would create a bias, a niga towards you. And if you were ever in my courtroom, I would be a little bit more biased towards you. So they pulled out. If you look at the Gammorra, if you want to understand life, do not look at life by what's in front of you. Because what's in front of you is already too late. If you want to understand life, you have to look at life by what's inside you, by your filter. But here's the problem. We can't look inside us because we don't live inside our heads. So the kesh buru is constantly trying to get us to figure out ways to get inside. You get inside your head to see your filter to see your You win. You spend your life on the outside. You're walking around and for all you know you're working for the Yateser. And that's not a life worth living. Everything's worth living. But it's a life worth fighting. always be living. Let's hear the story again. Watch how this works. The leaders of the generation come looking in Tarot and Hashem has them sent all the way in. And they walk in and as they come out, what they see are three major things that are getting in their way. They see big walls and they see people dying because there's funerals and they see big fruit and they come back and they determine that it doesn't make any logical sense. It doesn't make any material sense to come in. Do you know why? Because we can't beat big walls and you can't beat giants and it's not going to work out and they seem so practical and it seems so right and it seems like it makes total sense. It is the lowest on the totem pole of the things that are wrong. And in this the in the story the Zohar says from the quotes and says what were they thinking they're saying here in the desert we're the leaders but they're thinking in their minds they're not saying it out loud they're not talking about them particularly about the people on the page these are the leaders of the generation they were anashim they weren't the bad guys they were the best guys this is the first generation in Kal we say that there's a that the duras go down and where every time the duras Let's go lower. This is the first dar. They walked out of the sea. These aren't regular people. These people saw prophecy. They saw they saw miracles. They were at Torah. This isn't the regular guy in the back. This isn't the shifyam. This is the leader in the front. This is the rabbi. This is the galadar of the first generation. You understand what we're talking about? These people are perfect in the first generation standing at hari being leading glazel in the first generation. This is the best of the best of the best of the best of the best. They're walking in Tyr and they see REAL STUFF AND THEY COME BACK AND they go, "Oh my gosh, WE'RE GOING TO DIE, GUYS. We're going to die." And we can look at it and go, "They mean it." They weren't lying. They weren't making it up. There was really walls. There was really giants. They were just trying their hardest to do what was right. So why are we rocking them for? What is the big deal? And the Zar says, "You know what the big deal is? Because in their hearts they said to themselves in the midbar we're going to be leaders but I don't think we're going to be leaders in Erit Israel. You know what that's called? A nia. There was a filter in there. Somewhere deep into their heads somewhere in their consciousness there was a little bit of like wait it's over. I can't be the leader. I'm not the rabbi anymore. I'm not the CEO anymore. The kids don't need me anymore. They're all growing up. There's some level. There's some small bias, some small ani that was stuck in the middle there that in that little tiny ani created a small little filter that when they walked in, WHAT THEY SAW WERE THE things that can go wrong. But how do they even know that it can go wrong? Who told him to look at these things for? Mosha said, "Go in there and look to see if there's walled cities." Why? Because Moshe said, "If I'm trying to figure out the people are strong, who should I be more scared of? The people behind walled cities? The people in the valleys? If I'm walking the streets and I see a bunch of guys hanging on the street corner at 3:00 am and down the block is a guy who's got 30 locks on his door. Who am I more scared of? Okay, I can't get I gotta get into the door. BUT ONCE I GET INTO THAT DOOR, THE 20 LOCK GUY, THAT GUY'S OUT. OKAY, WE GOT TO FIGURE out how to get into the walls. But Mosheru says, "If you see people in valleys, that's a tough nation. You see people behind walls, okay, we got to get in there. But once we're in there, they've never fought a day in their lives." Moshe says, "If you see walls, we win." They say if you see walls we lose. Why? Because Mosha's schema was Hashem who Elohim. And their schema was Hashem who Elohim with ani. What about me? I'm going to be the leader. And that little bit of Ani, you can't see it. You can't see it because when you look out into the world, it looks like it's wrong. It's my brother's fault. That's why my parents are upset. No. If my sister would just finally have it in her house, everyone would be happy in the f No, no, no. If my boss, if my friend, if the rabbi, if if look at every single mas and you will find that everybody is always right. Do you know why? Because they don't see reality. They see it through the prism of their filter and their filter has a knee. If you grow up in this world and they put you in a little classroom and they tell you, "Here's the objective little trophy. All you kids are from the same community, same age, one, two, three, compete." The kids who can memorize, swim to the top, and everyone goes, "You're the best kid in the Oh, the kids that can't, but they can play sports, they have their own little lane. And the kids that can't do either, but they look good in clothes, you have that lane. And the kids that can do either, but their daddy loves entrepreneurship, and they found a way to sell cell phone units in the corner, make eight bucks, and daddy loves it. They have all their own lane. All of us are competing for something in this world. And if you live in the material world, you have to appreciate that we live a life and every single thing that has been told to us since we're little has been take care of yourself. I'm on a call yesterday and someone goes authentic self. I'm like what does that even mean? It just means yourself. It's just yourself. I need my iPhone, my life, my space, my truth. Hear this Carl Rogers stuff that has taken over the world. My truth. What's your truth? What does it even mean? It means I don't have to submit to Hashem because I'm a human and I've been around for 25 years. I have my truth. I need my space. You know what that is? It's a little filter inside us called an. And that little ane, you see, you can't tell cuz it's it creates a filter. And that filter looks out and goes, "The world's insane. Isn't the world cra is it just me?" And they go, "No, it's not you. It's your parents." No. If Hashem doesn't deliver for me, I'm in I believe in Hashem when he delivers. And if he doesn't deliver, we got problems because I did the thing he wanted. I said the stuff at the time he said and I wanted the thing that he said he's going to give me and he didn't give it to me. So like I don't know if I'm still feel I'm not really believing. Why? Because I don't bow to Hashem. Hashem works for me. I need And we can't see it. Stuck. It's right in there. And here's where it gets difficult because me and you were born with an isama in which Hashem is connected to us always. And the true us is and the greatest life you can possibly have is a life in which you walk around and what you have isina. We're sitting here tish and what we want is justina. That's what this game is about. We just want more Hashem. Tishab is not. And you see what? Watch how this works. You ready? This tishov has become like bad people want to hurt us and Hashem should protect us. That's why tishab is like watch when bad things happen. You know why? Because that gets us. A speech about hashem is okay. A speech about how anti-semitism. Woohoo. That's tishabove. A good crazy story in the Holocaust. Listen, my grandparents Holocaust survivors. A good crazy Holocaust story is tishov 101. You know why? Because if I mess with your physical safety, that's re Hashem. Bring gula, which means bring a better gulus. I don't want to go there too. I just want to have more money and be safer and just make sure that nobody can touch us. You know why? Cuz it's about me. But I have to say it's about you. And we come another year and at some point we got to just at some point we got to just be real. Like at just some point in our lives, we just got to stop. Like enough. We just got to stop playing. Like enough. We just got to like stop and be like, "Holy cow. Does Hashem really work for me? Is this what I really believe? How much of my year was just my filter going me? Of course, I looked at the stimuli and it was perfectly aligned with what I wanted, but I can't tell because it looks like that's truth because I never got inside. Tishab is the day that Hashem says, "You want to really know? I'm going to teach you." Here's how it works. You saw that sign over there? It's called a vodara. It's a big problem, but you know what? It's objective. You can see it and fix it. That thing over there, Zema, huge problem. It's objective. You can fix it. The third thing, which is practical, pragmatic. Of course, we shouldn't do this. Come on. God doesn't expect you to actually do this. That sounds so logical. But you got to understand something. If you can see inside that the ani that's creating that filter your life will slowly block the shrina out. You see when we talk about the bas mikdash we can't get the bas mikdash and hashem said I never told you to get the bas mdash. I told David, I told Schlommo, I told him, but you know what I did for you? I said mdashi. Here's what I told you. You're a base on mdash and I am going to dwell in you. And if I can dwell in you and you and you and all of you get together and what you have is lots and lots and lots and lots of schina, you know what's going to happen to the world? There will be lots and lots and lots and lots of schina. then maybe I will be able to fill in the gaps. So when we look around on tishab and we're like I really hope that it comes what we really mean is I really hope I don't have to fast. That's like the top thing because if we could eat on tishab no one do anything but I really hope I don't have to fast this year which means I really hope for you. But when we say we really really hope for what we're doing is sitting back and saying hashem please bring whatever you got to bring. DO WHATEVER YOU got to do. Just figure it out. I don't know if it's a donkey in the negv. I don't know if it's someone in the north. I heard that one. I don't know if it's Iran. Whatever it is that you got to do, just take care of it. We all have phones. We can see it. Don't worry about it. We'll be good. And says, "I should bring Goula. I'm sorry. Last I checked, you kicked me out." Like, I don't know. I was in the house. Weren't you the ones that kicked me out? And you want me to bring Gola? I thought you were bringing Gola. I'm sorry. Weren't you bringing the Weren't you bringing the cake? Cuz last I checked, I was happy in Errol. I was happy the basa mikdesh and we go well I can't bring goula I'm one person goes no no no no no no no you have a ba mdash you know what it's called it's called you oh no no no I'm not says who oh I know says who you ready for this moraglin the katskarbi says you know what they said on the way out the last thing the moragum said open the whole door you know what they said we were in our eyes like grasshoppers So we were in theirs. Oh, you felt like you can, so you can't. You know what that's called? A nia. You're sitting here right now, you're watching on the line. If I say you're a base ham migdash, and you go, "No, I'm not." That's called a That's called the Yateser Har. You want to know if the horara is in your mind right now? You're a base hammdash. No, I'm not. That feeling, that sense, that sense of I can't is in a gia that says I don't need to because if I'm not a bame migdash, I don't got to go through this process because if the world's on my shoulders and really I got to really figure this thing out. Here's the secret. If you want cahula, all you got to do is bring into your life. That's all you got to do. And the is already in your life because you're built with Hashem. But what's blocking it is as the Garra says, Hashem says is the only thing that I can't live with one. You know what blocks? Ani. This is the game. This is the game. Let's not over complicate it. So we get to the end of end of and have nothing from this. This is the game. The more my life revolves around me, the more I block Hashem, the more I am distant from my core. And I won't know because when I look out into the world, the things that come back to me feel so logical. It makes so much sense. I don't know how I can find the ani, the selfish me. The game of tishabove is sitting down for a night and asking ourselves where have I blocked shina in my life. Where have my year did Hashem give me the ability to be a bas mikdash? And I took it and turned it into a self focused place of self idolatry and I can't find it. So then the keshu says something more. Now let's get into it from the rabbi. you know, how do you know if you're serving Hashem for you or for Hashem? So, the rabbi gives an approach that I want to share with you tonight. The BMT says oh many years ago I was sitting with a friend an older individual and the older individual I had met through some cloud thing and I was talking about something totally different and in his room came one of his children. This man achieved an enormous amount of wealth. He built an enormous business and he had two I don't I think if I remember correctly whatever it was some sons-in-laws and some sons and he was at the point of his career where he was about to retire and he was figuring out who gets what and in comes his son into this office where we were s standing talking about something totally different and he creates this model that he puts on the board and he explains to his father how they're going to go this and they're going to raise money here and they're going to be able to do this thing and buy this asset and turn it like this and do this. And it was this brilliant I mean brilliant presentation about how the business is going to go from one to 3x and make so much more money for the family generationally. It was something that was stellar. I was sitting there for something else but he walked in, they started talking and I was like blown away by it. And he walks out of the room and the father turns to me and said, "This son is killing me." I said, 'Killing you? I said, "This is not I mean, you're a real estate guy. This is not I mean, you don't make stuff like this." He said, "My children, God forbid," he said, "His children are killing each other." The worst thing he ever did, he said, was give his kids money because now they're waring with each other. And my this one I'm trying so hard to this one thinks this is what he tells me with like with with like tears that like a tough guy. It's like tough guy tears, you know. This one thinks that by walking in and impressing me with how much money I have, I'm going to be impressed. What he doesn't understand is that he's thinking like a kid because kids think about themselves and every kid thinks about himself, but dads think about their kids. And no dads think about one kid over the next. And so instead of walking into my office and telling me that daddy, I got this because you're a father and you've worked every second of your life to build a business and all you want is your children to look over to each other and say, "We're doing this together. We got this. We're a family. The only thing mommy and daddy wants is to see that when I look down, I see kids that love each other. You're walking in and impressing me by how much you're trying to think you look good in front of me. You think you're a better real estate guy than I have? You think you're making more money than me? You already have so much money. You know how much easier it is to make three million from two than zero to one. Do you think this is impressive? You know what's impressive? He said to me, "If you'd walk in and say, "What do you want, Dad? What do you want?" You know what you want? You want the kids to love each other. You want to be a grandfather at a shabas table, at a pesak table, and see all your grandkids in the room playing with each other. You want to see your sister helping her sister. You want to see the guy in the back, the son who's not as smart, who doesn't know how to make models and and and doesn't how to be able to figure out how it works. You want the older kid to go to the younger kid and go, "You know what, honey? Listen, we're walking into daddy. Come in with me. You do the PowerPoint. I'll do the Excel. We'll make it work." That he says to me quietly that's what I want from him. You think I want you impressed by him? The bashtov says something. He says how do you know if your votes hashem is being makub hashayim? Do you think the came out when they first came out? Do you really think the were the rush rush? Do you think the who the li of the world came out and said we're going to purposely do against hashem's will? They came out and thought they're doing the right thing. They did the wrong thing. But they thought it was the right thing. You know why? Because in their minds is a bias called ani. They couldn't see it. But their lives were built on it. When we walk around in our is hashem, how do we know if my daving is mukbay? How do we know if my learning is mukb? How do I know if my avot is hashem? How do I know if my avote is hashem goes up to heavens and hashem says to me that's my son? How do we know? What proof do we have? What metric do we have that we're not walking around? The Gomorrah says, "Do you think you're better than what's going on in the Bay Sheni? They had Torah mitzvos and Tobin and they still were inban. Why do you think you're still in for you do more than what's the block?" So this is what the rabbi says. This is unbelievable. And it's right in the BM. THE BASHM SAYS, "YOU THINK you get toe without you think you can get toe without it doesn't work like that. There is no such thing as Hashem without the Balata says, do you know why we love each other for? Because we're all part of the same nishama." When we think like children, what we're saying is, "Hashem, I want you to take care of me. I want you to worry about me. And it's awesome. We come to the and we dive into him. It's great. We come to the and we do mitzvah and it's great. And we do and it's great. And Hashem looks at us and when he looks at us, what he's saying to us is you got it, but does your brother got it? You know how to learn, but you got four people in your family that don't. Have you ever thought for a second that somebody else how I feel when there's three Jews not like you that know doesn't know how to learn? You know how to cook, but your sister-in-law doesn't know how to cook. What do you think it's like for her when she comes home to her husband? You ever think of that? You're a businessman and five people are coming to you for advice and you're giving stuck. Have you ever looked at them and said, "Hey, wait a second. Can I build one of you up to your feet?" The only listen to this, the only way that we could know if we are doing a vote as Hashem and we love Hashem is when we take our perspective, we take our schema off and we put on the schema of Hashem. Loving Hashem means I want what you want. Loving somebody means I don't want to go to what I want to do. I want to do what you want to do. If we love Hashem and we want to grow in our aas hashem, if we want to grow in our lives, how do we know? What is the litmus test to know if we're growing in our lives? The litmus test is what would Hashem think of this? If there's someone in my life, is his success my success? We spoke two years ago about this idea of jealousy and how if somebody has more than me and I see they have more than me and I'm upset. It shows the kadeshu that we're fighting, we're competing and the rabbi said if you see someone that has more than you as opposed to trying that they should have less d they have double. Now we flip it and go even further. If we have something, if I've been given something and I see somebody in else in the world that doesn't have it and I can give it to them and don't, am I thinking from me or am I thinking from Hashem? The way to get to a hashem, the way to get up and make sure that my schema is clear, the way for me to be able to go up to Hashem and say, "I love you. I want more." The way for us to get to Canadan, you know how is by thinking, what would a parent think? There is no parent in the world that would ever want one kid to win and one kid to lose. I GOT FIVE PEOPLE IN MY FAMILY and I'm succeeding at this thing. Are they succeeding at this thing? If I look over to somebody else and I think they could do it and I don't let them do it because they can have more than me, is that looking down and going, "That's my boy." If I just figured out that I don't learn because I'm too busy and then I sat down to start learning and I look over my office and nobody's learning. Is Hashem super proud that I'm not able to take that feeling and say, "Can I get a way to get people to learn?" When I walk around and people come to me for help or come to me for advice or need a good word, if I go into a room with a new outfit and people are walking in the room and I know that because I want people to tell me that I look good, SO DOES EVERYBODY ELSE. And my first thought is, "Tell me that I look good." And I was looking down and going, "Really? You're diving for me? You walked into a room. You learned today. You know how to do a deal. We look at when we're talking about sitting around at Nishabove. We think it's so hard for us to get to Ba Mikdash. We think it's impossible." Impossible. Hashem says, "What are you kidding me?" We're like, "It's too hard. It's too hard. How do we make it all works?" I'm like, "What is wrong with you? You have a B mikdash. All you got to do is look around your dalas and go, how do I look at YOU AS IF I'M HASHEM? I'm the father looking at you." The Batani says, "We have the same nama. Your winning is my winning. And if I think your winning is my losing, that's my schema. That's my Yateser. We can walk around every single day of our lives, every day of our lives, and have more abus Hashem. How? By abus each other. Hashem, you think it's so complicated? You know that that I'm important? How many people know that that you that don't know that I'm important? Have you ever once reached out to one Jew and said, "By the way, I can help you." If we do, we're telling Baru, "My schema is changing. I'm not putting on the schema of me. I'm putting on the schema of you. When a father looks down, when a mother looks down and says, "All I want for my kids is for them to take care of each other." They're praying. That one kid looks up and says, "I trust you'll take care of me. Let me see if I can help my siblings." That father looks down and goes, "That kid loves me." The only way I know the kid loves me because if he's asking me for things, maybe he loves himself and if he's doving to me, maybe he loves himself. Doing to him, but maybe it's coming from that same self ani that started this whole problem and it looks so good on the outside. It looks like it makes so much sense or better. We're in Bayeni and it looks like everybody's from why can't we have the B mikdash for the rabbi says and the sadikim are saying you know why? Because how do I know that what's inside you is for you or for me? You know how I know? What are you doing when you look over to somebody else? If I look over to the next per the next person in front of me, I don't got to take over the world. If I look over to the next person in front of me today and say, "How can I help what's in your life?" You know what I'm doing? I'm lowering myself. I'm bringing in more Shina. We think it's so hard. We think the Bish is impossible. And we walk around during tishabove and we're like, "Yay." Hashem's like, "Yes, what are you talking about? What am I asking for? I'm asking you to look over to the person next to you that you're related to or that's in your life because you can't get to me without going through each other. There is no path to Hashem without each other. Nobody goes up alone. We talk about public school kids and we're okay with our kids in yeshiva. We're talking about Torah anytime and we know people that aren't watching. We talk about someone that needs our help and I can help them and I don't want them to succeed more than me because it's going to make me feel bad. Hashem says really an tishabove is the time that we sit on that floor and when you sit on that floor in tishabove Hashem says do not over complicate this. Do not sit down cry and tell me this sounds familiar. fake tears. Do not cry of I'm going to get hurt. Hashem, please save me because I want to feel secure. Tishabove, Hashem looks down and says, I'm telling you how to get out. You're your base hamdash and all you got to do look up to me of course and do what you believe for somebody around you. Cuz when you're together, I look down and see you caring about each other and say, "Ah, they got it. It's one unit." That's what a father would think. Now, let me add one more thing and then I'm done. The rabbi goes even further. Watch how this works. The garra tells us that you do chuva in two ways. this chuva which means I have to be better that feels a little it's important but it feels a little bit focused then there's something called chuvi if I love hashem by how I love Jews and I'm going out and loving Jews then in the area that I am deficient in I know how important it is if I realize that sneas is important and I'm trying to get better at it I know how important it is. I don't want myself to get better at it. I want people to get better at it. So my chuva doesn't come because I want more. It comes because I want Hashem to have more. If I know that learning is important, if I know that that is important, and I'm trying to work on my and I realize that if it's important to me, it's important to Hashem, which means it's important to other Jews, and I go out and not only try to make myself better, try to make people better, then what I'm doing is chua and I'm taking my failures and turning them into opportunities for multiple people to come to Hashem. That's how we return. That's our way back. The zerosion says the reason why we say there's a that says it should say I want you to hear me. And he says, do you know why? Because if I love somebody, which is why says before you dab, And that's our choice and that's our question. We have to realize what we're doing here. The fight for tonight and the fight for Tishab is not to look out and say physically I'm scared. Hashem bring the fight for tishab is for us to say the whole story took place because no one was able to see on the inside of their minds. The ani took over. The secular world took over my thinking. Gullos took over how I see the world. And in order for us to fix it, we have to say to ourselves, what am I going to do honestly and practically to make this different? And when you look out into the world, you will find Hashem is handing you actual ways to bring gula because he's telling you how to act. If you have parents and you do not put your head to your parents, what you're saying is ani. The rabbi says the beginning of tish wasn't the moragim. The beginning of tish was as cried a tear and a bidish got destroyed. He cried his second tier because the base of the destroyed and Hashem had to stop him from his third tier because his third tier would have destroyed the third. Why did Asf have it? Because as hadim keshb who says a person who puts his head down to his parents, you know what he's doing? He's lowering himself for me. When you walk into your families and there's makus in your families and for a second you think about your parents and then you think about Hashem and you go, "Oh my gosh, on my dime in my life I'm going to let my locus come in." It's just a whole collection of ani. When someone's whispering shun in your ear, what they're saying is ani. And every single time Hashem sends something to us, another person, another thing that we can help pick them up, make them better, give them more, teach them something. What we're doing is showing the Keshu, it's not about me. And through each other and through a keshb looks out and goes, "Wait a second. Why are they all so good to each other for?" Ah, because they're thinking like me. They're worried about their father. Now I get it. That's the challenge. It's easy to go back tonight and be like, I hope that my life works out. It is hard to go back tonight and say, and I'm begging you, who in my life, right this second around my circle, can I pick up the phone and actually make their lives better this second? Who in my life needs me to give them something that I have that can help them? What do I know to be true? My learning, my daring that I have only kept to myself. What am I scared of to go to another Jew and say, "Let me help you figure this out, too." That thing in my head I wanted to start, why don't I start it? Why? Because I'm going to fail. Oh, right. I heard that once before. Moragum when tishabove stops becoming this they're coming to get us Hashem save us and starts becoming I'm a Mishkan I want to bring in Hashem looks down and goes you finally got it look around your daladamas look at the people I put in your life and stop fetching grow up. Stop fetching. You can You're not a grasshopper. Don't believe them. You can bring an enormous amount to the people around you. Stop hesitating. I only gave you that coach to share it. And if you really loved me, you would come up to me and say, "Daddy, not I'm impressive." You would say, "Daddy, I'm trying to help someone next to me become impressive, too." And Hashem would say, "You finally got it." The path to a hashem is aasro. And if tonight, if just tonight, me and you, if we stop overdoing it, just stop with the drama. If tonight all we do in my humble opinion is think of that person in my head that I am a 100% going to make their lives better if I'm eight or if I'm 88. And we commit ourselves together tonight. We just commit ourselves to start to think of the world through Hashem's eyes. I want to look at a Jew the way Hashem would look at that Jew. Her win is my win. Her pain is Hashem's pain. I can't beat people because then I'm Hashem is losing. And if Hashem gave me something and he sees that I'm helping somebody with it, the nas he has, he'll give me so much more. If we just walk around with that level of aas to each other, simple close by. What we'll do is we'll start to clean out that moraglin ani one at a time day by day one person one moment and if we do it and your mishkun gets 1% moreina and so does mine and so does yours and so does yours and Hashem looks down and goes holy cow what are they doing they're not thinking of themselves wait what just happened they're thinking of their brothers and sisters to help them to pick them up to make them greater than themselves if they can do it. This person has talent that you don't have. You know, one of the greatest leaders was in cabal is a man named the rashash. He has kavan as the rashash. You know, the rash was a janitor from what I understand in this the the yeshiva of mukubalim with kayun as the rashisha. Kayun was the rashish shiva and he had all these questions on cabala and he couldn't figure them out. And at night as he was sweeping the rashash would answer the questions and put it down. And finally one day his daughter said, he goes, "Who are these ants?" Ela Navia. And she goes, "No, it's the guy in the back, the Janer." He goes, "The Janer calls him up." Goes, "What do you know the answers?" He goes, "Yeah." He says, "You know the answers?" He gives her his daughter as a as as a wife. And he goes, "You're the rasha." He goes, "How about the rasha? You're the rasha." He goes, "If you know these answers, you're the rasha." Do you know why? Because if he can make him big, Hashem would be proud. If we walk around all day thinking, how do I make Hashem proud? And we make each other bigger, we start to bring, we reduce and we're we're machaking the sin of the moragum. And maybe with that, Hashem looks down and says, "They finally got it. They're not crying another year over having safety and physical money, and they're not pumped to finally be done fasting. They got it. They're together as my children. I don't love one more than the next. They're taking care of each other. They're building each other up. They're bringing them closer to me because Abas Hashem, according to the Rambam, is bringing Jews towards Hashem. They're not worrying about how they look. They're worrying about how that person can connect to me. And if we do that and we commit tonight, when you see makus in your family, it should feel to you as if you are causing Hashem pain. Nobody wins. And if we commit ourselves to go to a hashem through the prism of Hashem, through each other, maybe, just maybe, Hashem looks down and goes, "Whoa, ho." brothers and sisters again. Torah mitzvah said ahum they finally got it. I don't want their Torah if they're knocking the person next to them. That's Torah for themselves. You think the that makes you look good is the Hashem's proud of Hashem's proud of the that makes the other person look good. You think when you d for yourself you make give you d for yourself it's good. What does the gora tell us? You down for somebody else first. You get it first. You know why? Goes woo. You have it sar and you're down for somebody else. We should be za. I'm begging you. I'm begging us. I'm begging us. We should be so to finally give Hashem the nas he deserves to see kids act like kids with each other in the way that their father would want. And if we can walk around every day and say, "What would Hashem want me to do for this person?" And use that as our new schema, we are fixing the sin of the moraglin. Person by person, smile by smile, compliment by compliment, Torah by Torah, we lift him towards the Kuresh because we know how important he is. And our Mishkan is filled with more R. And then there's more R in the world. And one at a time, one light, one flame at a time, maybe Hashem will look down and go, "They're not perfect, but they think of what I would want. They're making me proud because you don't have to have the perfect Excel spreadsheet. You got to take care of your brother." And if we can lift each other towards Torah, towards Hashem, towards each other, towards and really care about the success of each other and take it on as a binar starting today. And I'm going to ask you, and then I'm done, take upon yourself now before tishov is over, one time a day to do one thing for someone else that would make Hashem proud just until Rashana. And if we could, can you imagine if between now and Rash Shana we do one thing for someone else beyond that Hashem looks at and goes for me and we go just for you and we get to Rashana and we turn to the Kuresh and say I'm not perfect but I'm thinking like you because I believe you're the king and our father. We should be a day where we act that way. We bring the gula one at a time. >> Amen. Please stay in your seats for a moment everybody. Please stay for just a moment. Some very very important announcements. Thank you. First of all, Charlie, thank you very much. Every year your sharim changed my life personally and many other people as well. And Bazadashem, even when Mashia comes and we're going to have the beta mikdash, the tishb, we're still going to have the events. and Bazad Hashem on a night of tishab it's going to be a happy day and Charlie will baze still be speaking we're going to broadcast around the world thank you Charlie okay please stay in your seats I really have some very important announcements please guys a little respect give me a few seconds okay first of all we're doing to time is doing something very very special between now and the end of tishabove does anyone here by a raise of hands have anyone that you care about who ever passed away in your life let me see your hands anyone that you ever care about passed away. I think we all do. And we have these orange cards. If you just give us their names and their yard site dates on their upcoming yard site for free, no strings attached, we will put their name on the homepage of Torah anytime. And all the learning of that day, which is over 40,000 hours, will be in their in their memory, in their honor. Please take advantage of this. Everyone who's watching on Torah anytime, you can go to freedication.com as well. So, everyone who's here, take these orange cards and fill them out and leave them. It's free. That's number one. Number two, last year on Tishbove, we had over 750,000 people who were inspired with the program. We have an opportunity with your help to get it over a million people. There's 15 million plus Jews in the world. So even though it's a impressive number, it's still not enough. So each one of you tonight, tomorrow, message people, tell them to go on the Torah anytime. Tishabove event, everything from A to Z is always free. Put it on your social media if you have it on your WhatsApp statuses, whatever you could do, please take advantage of this. This tremendous mitzvah to inspire people and bring them closer to Hashem. Also, Barak Hashem Torren time is celebrating 20 years since it started and it started right here in Bet Gabriel. It's not just a website. It's not just an app. It's not just a hotline which gets over 4 million calls a year. We're also coming out with a pocket device in a few months. Matashem, our very own pocket device so you have something comfortable to give to your kids. You don't have to give them a smartphone to use to anytime. And we also have the daily dose. We have a publishing department. We have something for kids which I encourage everyone here to check out called Story Anytime. Incredible original shows created by Torian Time and many other story and time speakers. We have a publishing department like I mentioned. We have a newsletter. Everything we do from A to Z is Barak Hashem free. It's free to the world. It's just not free to Torah anytime. I encourage everyone and I'm finishing with this to join the Torah Anytime $1 a day program. There is no greater return of your saddaka money than to support the spreading of so much Torah in the world. Go to tora anytime.com/daily to anytime.com/dailydoll or you can text or WhatsApp 917-6252120. There's no greater way to show your appreciation, your auroras to Torah anytime but than joining the dollar a day program and anyone who does it right here right now in this room will get a free book the daily dose. Please take advantage of it. Thank you very much Robbie. Okay, thank you so much Simone and to time. Want to remind everyone that that that the program continues tomorrow 10:20 a.m. right here until 7:30 p.m. There's going to be over 20 different amazing speakers. Rabbi Pesak Cron, Rabbi Gowasa, Rabbi Schaefer, Rabbi Klatskco, over 20 different speakers. Of course, everyone should join us right here on at Bethgario 663500 Street and Farest Hills to.com/hazaklive kazak.org/live /live and the call number extension 46 and of course we want to encourage everyone to be part of partner with Kazak on on the Tishba program and you can dedicate a speakerish fu shimma at givekazak.com giv hazq.com give.com Thank Go.