Thought for the Week Parshas Vayeira Avraham Avinu Kindness Warrio, Rabbi Yaakov Winner, 5782

several how are you I hope everyone is I hope everyone is healthy strong and happy physically and spiritually today is we're going to speak today a continuation of what we spoke last week last week I mentioned that the story of Abram fighting the Four Kings and what lesson we learn from that but I mentioned how that had a tremendous impact on Lloyd and I said we'll leave it for another date so I decided we'll discuss it this week because actually it's connected to a story of this week's passion but before that as usual we'll start with the prayer and as we explained last week at length the first possecking capital pay test masculation we explained that acquaintances this verse is profound without see this it's just a matter of statement the fact that this Capital the following chapter of tillem was written by avram avinu and Rashi says that it's referring to our room the strong one who came from the East but according to see this what we're talking about over here is maskel something which illuminates and brings enlightenment means strength strength goes into the on the essence of the Jewish Soul his power to be completely selfless and transcend limitations comes from the word shine and that should illuminate my entire being so the prayer basically masculation is a prayer to Hashem that my jewishness my Jewish Consciousness should be very healthy and strong and the deepest deepest levels of my empowerment and strength should be revealed and alive and healthy and well in me that's the prayer that's the request so last week I spoke about avram Vino as a kindness Warrior now I don't know if it was so clear so if I'm going to clarify again just for two seconds when I meant to say about a kindness Warrior was two things number one that he's a warrior as a personality a rumble is just not some mild-mannered Meek vulnerable soft person even though that's all could be also channeled as a positive thing but just understand like in other words not some what we call peace loving pacifist no that's not what everyone is avram's kindness and he is the kindness person comes from a powerful conviction comes from a sense of values comes from his being connected to the neighborhood so that's number one he's a kindness Warrior it's coming from a strong personality in a good way in the best way second of all kindness Warrior means that you're actively doing kindness I didn't say this last week but just we're gonna add something new right here about the beginning of the parisha without elaborating the story in the beginning is that avram had circumcised themselves and then he was weak and Hashem made the sun go out and be a very hot day so there shouldn't be any passerbys so the room shouldn't have to work hard but then the baby should have saw the way everyone was so upset and he made guest come and everyone was able to exercise his kindness so from this we see the concept and we mentioned this many times of what does it means the nature of good is to do good just by a person being good that goodness so to speak is from within him and he has a kind heart that's not enough that doesn't really prove the point a good person has to be a do-gooder you have to actually do it and if not you feel like you're missing that's why we said many times the word from the previous Rabbi he said that turquoise can either but gosh means isn't she can talk a day which you don't do another Jew a favor in the physical sense it's not a day so in other words imagine you're a person and this is the way you're meant to live your life that how do I measure a good day you know it's a good day a good day is a day that I did something for another actually not only a good day what is a day only a day which I did a favor for another physically so that's the story in the beginning of the pasture without ramvino that's a warrior a kindness Warrior that means he's doing goodness none of it just comes knocking on his door he's seeking he's searching where's their place where he needs my help and therefore I have to activate and exercise my goodness muscle so to speak that means you're a good person and that's a kindness Warrior it's it's on the offensive so to speak it's proactive a kindness Warrior is proactive and now speak about another point to take a pause and I'll add it later we'll soon see now in this week's parachute we come to the story in the beginning as I just said two seconds ago about the angels that came and I've run had did the midst of guests hosting guests but then later on in the parisha we have the story of the way Hashem destroys sudden now as we mentioned last week Lloyd who's avram's nephew traveled and lived together in close proximity to late for years light was an orphan from his father that's another whole story and he was brought up in his uncle's house and then he himself became a businessman and he had possessions and he had herdsmen and he had Shepherds and he had cattle and there was a quarrel as we saw in last week's parisha and then they parted ways and then we saw from last week's parisha that when they parted ways with a room it was basically a rejection that's what Rashi says of them we mentioned it all last week it was a rejection of avram's way of life and of avram's God so to speak that's what Rashi says in other words the rejection of Hashem and a rejection of the whole idea really of of generosity of selflessness of kindness Etc that's simply what it means yes and that's why also as we mentioned this we can Rashi mentioned the reason how he became a captive act Etc as we mentioned last week was because he made these bad choices and he moved this time and what was the name so then was a city which represented the total antithesis of everything that I've run stood for so what does it mean it's not only if they parted ways they went in total opposite directions by light moving to stream it means he's going to the Sin City of the world capital of crime cruelty Etc now what happens in this week's passion my friends after we mentioned in last week's parisha and how we spoke last week about Abraham going I'm a serious nephe and that was the rep's answer [Music] victorious in the wars and the answer is last week I only explained the part because the chosen of Rome's Mercedes self-sacrifice to rescue another even against impossible seemingly odds now there's another major point with the rubber sets over there listen to this that this left an indelible impression on light and therefore when it comes to this week's passion we see the following story the angels two angels come this time and they come in front of Leigh's house and Rashi says by the way that that day light was appointed a judge so that shows that he had much more to gain but being on good terms with the city you know like you have corruption they say power corrupts absolute power corrupts absolutely so since like that day was appointed a judge it would be more in his self-interest not to do anything that would upset the community where he's from which is today anyways that day was appointed the judge the two angels come and standing there light invites them to coming to his house and originally they don't want to go into his house and obviously doesn't realize the angels and The Strangers and light is risking his life to invite him into his house but wait there's more in other words he's risking his life because he's doing something which is the opposite of everything that City stands for doing was all about cruelty all about being a sadist everything was warped and perverted to Harbor a guest would be the biggest crime the crime of hospitality so here light is inviting these two strangers into his house but wait there's more originally they refused they say no we won't stay in your house and then the Posse actually says these words he urged them very much and then they came to his house so the reason why the person is mentioning this is because even the mere fact alone that he offered them to come into his house was something which is we'll call it let's say heroic and very nice but the fact that they first refused and then he insists shows that he really really went out of his way and this was really really a very honorable Act and when you say if the word means exceedingly so the question obviously is why would they do that it's contrary to everything that we said until now he made the bad choice he went to stream he went to Sin City he went into a community which is corrupt corrupt and rotten to the Core in the worst possible way and he's comfortable there that's a fact and not only that he's seen as one of the great citizens of that City that's why they're making him a judge you understand and yet never listen this case he stretches out himself to go out and have self-sacrifice so to speak to invite these guests and the rabbit answers this question the river asks this question why would he put himself in such a danger why would he risk his life and we see what happens in the story that they come they they gather around this house the amount from him to bring out the guests see there So Not only was it an intention to go on self-sacrifice it was actual self-sacrifice because there was a major argument and a scuffle that happened right afterwards Etc so the question is why why would he do that and the rabbi answers that question in this that was because of the influence of avra you know the words and this is a tremendous lesson to all teachers and educators but we're not dealing with lights we're dealing with Yankee but nevertheless sometimes you're dealing with a person he's rejecting he's running in the opposite direction and you think to yourself what did you accomplish what influence did you have comes along the lesson of the story of light and this is what the rabbit says that it was because of Abram's General way of life of kindness and generosity that it left an impact and they had an impression on light but most the greatest and most powerful impact was one of Rome showed and demonstrated complete self-sacrifice to go out and rescue light like we learned in the last week's passion so that act of self-sacrifice touched an affected and influenced late he didn't lose completely everything that I've Rama told him yes he lived in Islam yes he was a star amongst the criminals King criminal King Khan King crooked King gangster but there was something there was some spark that was triggered that when he saw these strangers and he was brought up in avram's house and he saw he had a role model of what it means to go on self-sacrifice for another person so therefore that self-sacrifice of abramovino Love begets love self-sacrifice begets self-sacrifice that self-sacrifice of a rum to rescue life now ignited and became a catalyst and inspired light to go on self-sacrifice for these guests so this is a tremendous lesson and we have to always think about it very very much so in our daily life um first I'm going to say a word that's brought down in the secrets of the field I'm going to read it inside so don't think I made it up and it's so powerful says like this City Gathering once there was an interpretation given less smaller bahaya Tikka words that are kabbalistic terminology terms which say less small of ayatica there's no left in attic attic is a very high deep kabbalistic level one could say it's the highest of the highest levels Atticus Premier successor and primi sakesse is connected to atsumus in a special way so in other words when we talk about the tense of irat and we go from higher than Hackman's castle and in cancer itself these two levels Eric and attics attic is the inner of the inner and by the way acson as we mentioned last week we translated also ancient is also connected to attic Arctic could also be translated as ancient but anyways so there's a kabbalistic term which says a rule less smaller but hayatika there's no left whatever that means simply means there is Guru in attic there's no left in attic because Guru is from the left line okay but then it's interpreted as follows or if my design actor mean shift means like for example it's a hot talk it's a transcript in other words when you make an extract from one place and you put it another place an extraction so to speak but it means also shift taken from here to there if my tech sign if you want to move something extract a vacuum move away which means change to change to turn to shift whether talking about yourself to make a change your turn or a shift or another is knit with smell foreign it's not with left but rather with closeness so that's what it means less smaller biotica if you really really want to affect an attic to change someone including yourself less smaller it's not going to come through Smile Smile represents harshness smile represents um punishment smile represents fear smile represents um consequences but usually negative consequences so this is always something we have to always remember to ourselves again and again less smaller bahayatika if you ever really really want to change somebody it's not going to come through smile it's not going to come through being harsh Stern disciplinarian it's going to come through warmth through closeness through love now this is not the time to get into it now and as a matter of fact in my work I mean yes and if I could say that one of the Central themes that is like at the Forefront of education is this balance between discipline and inspiration and there's no question that you need both and there's no question that in our day and age we need more love but there's also no question that we also need discipline there's no question about it and I'm not here to solve the whole uh question in the scope of this talk but this is the truth that short term it could be smaller works sometimes sometimes we see more immediate results through smaller through consequences and and Stern Etc But ultimately ultimately there's no question about it that real change long-term change is only through love and through warmth Etc now even in cases where sometimes you need a radical sort of approach like yes yes sometimes you really want to make a change from one sort of change to another sort of change it needs a state of nothingness in between true but that still has to be based on the idea of the love of the Ava okay so therefore it doesn't change anything we're speaking about over here so let's get back to our story this is I love when you have a story from the Torah it demonstrates this lesson so this is the lesson over here concerning light and I've run that I've run because he was the Paragon of kindness sensitivity warmth care concern Etc therefore even the personal Rejects and went to the Other Extreme as in a city and is in a city of Cruelty even he was influenced by hashems but by avram's love generosity and compassion I want to say another thing side point that I never said this before but in general I believe that it's a good Sim and it's a good sign to remember there are three E's and if you remember these three E's you have the story of Yiddish kite the story of everything the secret of everything and the three E's are enlightenment empathy and empowerment and you could say I have ramavina represents all three masculine that's enlightenment which you could also say Enlightenment means truth that means Enlightenment when you see the truth so you could say alignment is Enlightenment you intellect then comes empathy that's your emotions you meet this your hagas and then comes empowerment your ability to carry it through so avram who's the first Jew represents all these three he's Enlightenment let me call Ryan let's explain the Kabbalah that I've run was the greatest philosopher somebody had the deepest deepest deepest deepest level of intellect with God so that's his Enlightenment and then this empathy he's a lover he's Crescent he's the epidemic as we spoke last week so he's the ultimate of kindness and compassion and sensitivity and generosity and then this empowerment a son he's strong he has that nashama he has the ability to carry through whatever values and virtues that he believes in to the very end no matter what obstacles trials and tribulations he will face he will be able to implement and actualize whatever values and virtues are the truth um by the way okay thinking about this idea that I've promised the influencer and that's what the rabbit brings out in the sikha of vaira the reason why Impressions speaks about his war with the battles with the Four Kings and his influence I'm late is to bring out that point that in the end avram is the greatest role model yeah as we spoke about last week but the lesson is also about his influence is influencing others and everything was about that because that's what Hashem wants so there's a tremendous once mentioned the same name before Chris Thomas which only a river could say what he says here because who are we to measure these things and it says over there that's Thomas foreign because he commanded he gave over the values and virtues to his children and to his house house and for Generations Generations okay they gave over his way of life to his children it continued Jewish continuity but listen to what he says over here he commanded doesn't mean that he commanded it means they connected what's up Ram's greatest virtue that he connected others to Hashem I know the whole gagne is that all of our films tremendous heroic Endeavors in the face of his trials pale in comparison to his commanding and connecting others by making them two meritorious so this is beyond words he's saying in this I am that the fact that you go out and put on film with another person you connect another youth with Hashem when you have positive impact and bring benefit to another kid that's greater than the arcader these are not my words this is the words of the feedback here in a game I'd like to finish off with one story in this vein about impacting and influencing through kindness and that's another meaning of kindness Warrior you know they say kill them with kindness don't kill them with kindness win them over with kindness and that's what means a kindness Warrior you have a warrior mentality to gain to advance to Triumph but how through kindness kindness Warrior you're going to win over others through kindness and that's what avram did with late there was Israel I would say he's probably 10 years older than me or in the neighborhood maybe maybe seven years older than me he's an empty stroll and he used to visit Melbourne from time to time he from bring once I would say his name it's not a secret but I can't say his name because I haven't asked him for permission and he said that when he was becoming a laborator custard he was having great difficulties with his parents and it caused Great Rift and tension in the house so he wrote To The River about the problem that he's having with his parents and the river gave him an answer of three points and I thought this the answer was brilliant and it could apply to many many people in many many different areas of life in fields of business of of in relationships it's it's principles in dealing with difficult relationships whether it's in a marriage whether it's in business whether it's with children any sort of relationships it's really about conflict literary resolution in a way so this is what happens who's a teenager then who's becoming a laborator he wrote to the Reba that he was having these difficulties and the rabbit answered three points I don't have the exact answer I wish I would have wrote down the exact wording of the rubber but I'm I'm reading to what I wrote down from memory the first thing they ever told them was don't get into arguments and debates I think I remember the part of the answer was you know I'm sorry don't get into arguments you know so many times that's one of the main problems we've come to difficulties you know you're you're a vexer you're an anti-vaxxer you're whatever it is you know don't bring it up don't talk about it don't get into arguments that's number one peace and reign in the household your parents don't want you to be lead your life in a certain way you want to lead your life in a certain way which might even be better don't bring it up don't get into arguments with the base the second thing they ever told them was be the ultimate role model of Manchester height and neither is there's nothing that a parent wants more than to think and see their child as a mensch he's such a good-natured person he always helps me out he always asks me how I am he always says can I do something to help you can I do something to make your life easier that idea so that was the second answer you're ever saying and the third answer they ever said was see if you could find a third party another person that could talk to your parents maybe and show them how if you become a laborator it's there's nothing wrong with it on the contrary it's great so when I heard that answer I thought I said wow and I and I thought to myself this applies to any situation think of yourself in your Workforce are you having difficulties with a colleague or with a boss think of a marriage think of any interaction interpersonal relationships these three steps apply don't get into arguments and debates Trying to minimize arguments to the base no matter what second will just be a mensch always do the right thing always be the nice guy and ultimately if you do that it'll be very very hard for the other person's animosity or or ill feelings towards you not to melt to always stay strong and have all these complaints against you and last but not least find the third party sometimes you need a third party to talk to that person so basically one of the three points that the reperto says over here was the theme of the today's whole talk which is less smaller biotica how does everyone influence even light through his kindness maybe we should help we should all improve in that area we forget that the river said that what's going to bring mashiach acts of goodness and kindness the repriment acts of goodness and kindness like smiling like doing a favor my symptoms that all is in the category of Acts of goodness and kindness let us all increase in Acts of goodness and kindness and this will guarantee bring the Gula means posting from my home that is your man in Melbourne