Maamar Purim D"H Reishis Goyim Amaleik Part 4 - Rabbi YY Jacobson, 5784

the yeshiva.net [Music] okay yeah it's a beautiful V of the the writes today's hisim yeah gim Al yeah he was one of the great rabinal figures in the 18 century he wrote how many SW did he write probably 50 60 SW he was a great great man so he says that say it's also brought in it's brought in the opening of the whole begins with the words begins I place before me always constantly T it that's how begins and the says with that mindset that Consciousness that's how you live your day that's how you begin your day what's the end of this is the beginning has 697 697 sections the last Simmon is about because it goes through the daily life it's called means the way of life and it goes what you do every single day right so you have the of waking up and and going to the bathroom and brus and of course uh and and you have daving blessings benching all that it also goes through it goes through all the holidays so shabas Andes and then all the holidays from niss from P you know all the way to pm and then the last Simon deals with P because is not a it's only on a leap year so the last brings two opinions is there a to make a meal and a feast on PM or not on we know there's a mitvah one of the mitz of one of the four Mitzvah is so one opinion he brings I think the tour in the name of the Riff that there's a duty there's an obligation to make a sud and a then he says it's not the Jews didn't accept this as a as a custom that you know everybody has a sud cotton but he says it's good to be it's good to increase in uh in the meal and in feasting and celebration because of that opinion and then finishes his last words is a good heart is always feasting you wouldn't think the would finish with this line usually is associated with a different feeling right but that's how which is a a good heart is you're always ready what you would say you're always ready for a party always not just you're ready M you're always involved in a feast so the says that it says in this week's right also lamb in the morning the lamb in the evening and all the in the was sandwiched between the two between the two means the carbon that was brought every day constantly so everything was sandwiched between the two like we say the last was the end of all the so he says which is the daily of the Jew there's two there's the and there's the one in the beginning and one at the end and everything is s in between these two states of Consciousness which come together that's the that's what you meant yeah that's the first thing and that means first and foremost also that I have a soul which is a it's not just God that somewhere in heaven it's uh it's who I am which I guess leads us right into our M I didn't know how the connection will be made but thank you the Dynamics of the whole H the Dynamics of the whole of that we spoke about so we book about of the Divine soul and now in chapter six which is Page 291 he discusses in the animal Soul okay today's class is dedicated by Andi in honor of all their grandchildren thank you very very much come on again so let let's remember the summation you have we discussed primarily is the right the cognitive ability especially understanding and then you have the which is connected to the Midas the emotive experiences of the soul and then you have nees which is connected to implementation and execution and as he said since this soul is rooted in it's rooted in's Essence we call it so essentially the soul resonates it vibrates every Divine manifestation and embodiment so since atmus chose to be manifested also through intellect through ideas through wisdom through awareness so the soul expresses that and the same is true with with mid emotions and the same is true with action so that's the ne and the and the that's connected to the Divine soul that was the main point we spoke about at length in the previous classes that we had now we continue chapter six this is the and he says we started last time the two lines everything is we know the says in every balance every Force has a counter Force thesis has an anti-thesis made that everything is so in other words there's always a competing Force counterbalance and that allows their for there to be choices that a person makes so we speak about the animal Soul the animal Consciousness does also do interesting even though the primary identity of the animal soul is Midas it's emotive we'll see in a moment why because it's focused on Survival so therefore truth ideas that represent truth are not its main point it's main point is mid that's true but but the is don't think it doesn't know how to philosophize don't think it doesn't have intellect it has also huh either you could say it's not a complete Bim or that we don't know what a complete Bim is even a complete and sometimes the of a could be very very sharp very acute in order to serve what it needs to serve and certainly it has the element of nees which is execution actualization just like we spoke in the is the way the Divine is manifested through the awareness of the nees of the Soul that's called nishish name says is associated with hav just like the Divinity godliness is is vibrates it flows through R that's the mid of the like he spoke the capacity for love the capacity for passion emotion nefes is the way godliness flows through neish which is that the soul is sensitive to action it'll do certain things it won't do certain things and it's not just one is born from the other just like a natural effect but the main thing is each one is a special it's a capacity it's a fuse of the soul and different souls are more sensitive you have a person that primarily he or she operates on a level of nees on a level of r on a level of it says in that we're all limbs of one says all limbs of one body but all limbs are connected to each other that's what a body is it's one organism and the DNA in each one has the the the blueprint for the entire organism but yet the heart has its function and the brain has its function and the legs have their function so but each person has within with in the collective organism of uh of of the world the world is like a gole each creature has its unique purpose even though it's one the same is true within the organism called Humanity the same is true within the organism called the Jewish people so you have those that they their uniquenesses those their uniqueness is R the hearts of everyone has a heart you can't live without a heart but these are unique Hearts they they they experience Divine Consciousness through the heart through emotion and others who experiences through m a cute awareness of doing not doing what to do what not to do and the same is true with with so the same so in order to understand this we have to understand a little bit about the animal Consciousness what do we mean when we speak about we spoke about it many times it's based on the idea from in brings in the first chapter of has a called and there he teaches that every single person every single Jew has two Souls KN one as this is the main theme one of the main themes in the T the first section of t with the bat explores this at length because we operate not on one level of Consciousness on two levels of consciousness one is that animal Consciousness one is the Divine Consciousness and as we said in the beginning of the we don't call it only the says we have a based on with the says there's the means literally a positive inclination and a negative inclination you're pulled to do good a is an instinct or inclination for when you say is a whole umbrella the soul is a whole personality it's a it's a whole identity a nees represents an entire life force which includes awareness an emotion an instinct and habit and reaction and patterns behaviors and thoughts and words and it's a whole NE it's a it's a universe that lives in you like it says has all the T spirit so this and then it has its garments its thoughts its words its actions and when you say you have two it means there like two lives in you two possible lives in you two full identities now there's no such a thing as divorcing one from the other because the is what's called in which means when it says in the the soul is in the blood that's the it's the animating force of the body it's the it Viv I it gives life to the entire physical organism so there's nothing the can do in this world without the without the go when you speak about the body the Goof that is the ne of it's the nees that fills and saturates and gives life to the body but not only Life as a tech in in in a functional way that too all the functions of the body all of the biological systems that we have all of them the digestive system and the circulatory system and the rest respiratory system and the urinary all the systems all literally every system in biology what is behind it the the soul that's called the is the fusion of soul and body that's all included in the umbrella that we call the natural soul the vivifying soul the animal soul the rational Soul this is all to guarantee life what life physical life and the ne is one concern it's concern is survival which is very very important and we have to be thankful to it because that's how we survive we survive through it survival and comfort to be able to survive like a mench or even like a be a beo to avoid avoid pain Embrace comfort and it's responsible for life so it's responsible for all the systems that make sure the body is alive this is called NE so generally we talk about two Souls but in each one there's so many different diens itions you can sub you could subdivide it into into a lot and each one as we just see in each one there's nees there's there's there's that's in each one but generally you speak about is part of the generally no in fact we'll see it's the bridge between the two the is the bridge between that the two Souls can have a conversation is only through the now now this is important understand the ne of Bahamas is not bad not bad it's actually very good it's actually very beautiful and very good it's responsible for life that's responsible for life but theam its focus is how to survive so therefore very early on even before birth it starts scanning it starts scanning for any information it can get about life about its environment about itself and it creates a map and the map is a very primitive and basic map it's called danger versus safety and it learns very fast what is dangerous and what is not dangerous what it needs to avoid and what it needs to embrace and it will fight for this because it needs to protect itself today we know in Neuroscience there's a part of the brain called the amigdala it's the stem of the brain the lowest part of the brain and considered the most primitive and Primal part of the brain and then the other parts of the brain develop on top of it above it and later you know until age uh 24 25 26 the brain is not fully developed even though at 18 you know everything but your brain doesn't know everything you know everything but your brain doesn't know everything and some of us even at you know 89 still don't know everything that migdala is it's it's like sitting on a wat Tower it's a Sher it's it's a sh it's sitting on a watchtower and it's alert and it's alert 24/7 it doesn't go to sleep because it has to detect danger and danger doesn't necessarily mean danger in the most extreme fashion danger means anything that's going to that's going to harm me yeah it may be unpleasant certainly may be dangerous danger is also not physically danger can also be emotionally if each Soul needs attachment if this is a place where I feel rejection maybe physically nothing will happen but this is a place where there's going to be rejection I'm going to avoid it and also the and here the ne develops a whole pattern of life that by the time I'm I know six seven certainly 5 10 20 never mind 40 50 60 theam already has been working very very hard for many many years to keep me alive I did they had a Ki fundraiser this week I did a interview with RAB shim Russell he's a therapist Lakewood in for like 40 years almost 40 years a therapist so uh they told me he's seeing over I don't know like probably around close to 10,000 children and teenagers it's a lot you know to speak to them over months so it's experience you know people often have theories and opinions on and education you know when married women who just got married a year ago and they have a carriage and they write opinions how to deal with your teenage children so I often ask people how many teenagers did you actually sit with and deal with there's nobody he just his opinions so when somebody actually works with people there's value in it so he was describing something and it was it was it was very painful but it was was a very Vivid description he said if a boy is sitting in a Yeshiva for 10 years and every day he feels like a failure because he can't really grasp the material and even if he's F and the people are fine we're not talking about uh an abusive situation a good a fine principal and a fine teacher people who mean they they talking about a good good people they mean well not like a guy told me he was in a school and they made a gum Tish a gum Tish every year a place where they put the gums and he told me he was to be there every single year or the story which for those who have been here for a few years you know the story we're not talking about that necessarily I once had a teacher and he said he came into the class and he said he's greater than the maral of Prague we were little kids maral of prag had one go and he has 19 and then he added and the Mar's gum didn't know how to talk and my gos know how to talk and he was so proud of his joke he was so proud of his joke I don't know if anyone in my class understood what he said and eternalized so it may have been not been damaging at all I never spoke to my friends about but I still remember that he said it and I remember how happy he was with his sense of humor was a project whatever did you complain I didn't complain actually I thought it was funny then I didn't I I don't think I internalized what he said um I didn't I didn't think his perspective on the nature of children is but it was just an interesting thing to tell the it's not what a you know you walk into a classroom I me I don't think that's the message I hope I'm not saying a big Kish here so so RAB Russell was saying as follow he said something very powerful so this kid is sitting yeah but he's four kids in the class finished before theah he would love he would have loved to but he can't he can't not only didn't finish didn't even finish now he didn't finish he didn't even finish he he said his he said his m whatever he said and he day in day out without anybody doing anything bad he's just feeling that I am a loser I am a loser I am a loser I am a loser he says at some point yeah this is prolonged trauma it's developmental it's complex there was no shock there was no accident there was no massive abuse but what happens is his brain is telling him this place is a place that causes you what it causes you to feel worthless nobody can survive that way way a person cannot survive feeling worthless a person cannot survive feeling worthless you can't so this means that the brain knows that this environment is a place you want to avoid and then he says once he becomes mature more mature uh has more courage has more guts is older doesn't not dependent on certain people for food and survival what's the first thing he's going to do he's going to detach and if he has a little more guts he's going to completely leave so I asked him so why does he have to stop stop putting Onan why does he have to stop putting on what what what's that then what's the fill and guilty he said because whose system is this officially this is God's system this is God's system the one who said to put on so when he seesan what does it remind him it reminds him of worthlessness what does shabus remind him and he says the challenge is what do his parents remind him and that's going to be the choice of parents will the parents also reinforce that I look at my father I look at my mother who represent the system they put him through this Isa and let's understand these are good we're talking about Good People we're not talking about people who had any negative intentions they wanted their kids to be happy and they wanted their kids to be healthy and they wanted their kids to be proud they wanted their kids to be fulfilled we're not talking about narcissistic Mish who couldn't care less about people why is this important not to blame not to judge but to be sensitive to understand how your neam works this is very very important awareness of the animal Consciousness is awareness of self the ne doesn't live in heaven it doesn't live in a vacuum it lives in the bikes the bikes is called the body and the animal Consciousness that's the k for the if the soul is the yeah this the most beautiful description of for the gof and it's a k for the you can't break the K you don't destroy the B it's an is to break even one brick of the B why God is a brick hem is a brick he not let to destroy bricks no because the brick in the is a for the if somebody even demolishes one stone I said brick one stone from the from yeah what does that represent not have said famous is you so you have the and you have the I wish they would know I wish they would know it you wish they would know this yes son was persecuted in yes for going toy for going to the gym he was persecuted St a yeah I'm sorry and it affects until today yeah we can't break the K if you break the K you break also the that's what the B once said it's such a powerful V say what does it mean when you see the Dunkey of your enemy and it's crouching under a heavy burden and you say to yourself I don't want to help him it's my enemy's donkey so the says go help the donkey Lift Up Lift itself up remove the burden help it with its burden don't allow the donkey to be tortured that way even though it's so asks I think what happened since when do Jews have enemies well I don't like your nose I don't like how you made my what's this so the says no it's huh he did an AA and you know it and you can be the best can't do anything about it there's no two aers right and it says you have all the good reasons and at least and the says that there's two people with donkeys one is your friend one is your go to the why to challenge what's you ha him you ha him what's the Lo so ansers I think if I hate you you also hate me so I hate you more so he says from the tit suddenly becomes hatred it's very hard to keep it I only hate you I hate you you hate me I hate you say he says there's a good luck of here don't worry the is also involved so the Tes as follows you see how Hees a you're going to see is the letters means the material the physical right is they called the physical you're gonna see your own which means you're donkey but it's your own donkey your own and this donkey is your enemy it's it's it's telling it's whatever you're in sh on is saying no I don't want to D I don't want to learn I don't want to it's a gave it a burden it's crouching I'm not interested it's crouching under the burden of so what are you goingon to say you'll turn him into your enemy I'm done with my I'm done you ignore it you supress it you don't listen to it why should I help you you're my enemy you're a dkey what do you do with a get it get him out you can't M get rid of your goof but you can you can know you could treat it like huh Splinter it repress it ignore it not hear it certainly not deal with it say it's a Goa mentality you're this you're that you're this yeah yeah yeah if you could kill it if you can't kill it at least at least paral I mean at least you know let let it be silent so the says these words this way the light of T will not dwell in the person this is yourik you need to elevate it you need to sublimate it there's a there must be a symbiotic a symbiotic connection your goof is not a mistake your has a relationship with like it says in in there's a marriage there's a marriage between the two it says in Z that is the and S is the Goof so the re once asked a question this is the before he even became a Reb he's in he said whatever says listen to her since when do we tell a Jew whatever your body says listen to your body really we're always told don't listen to your goof right listen to your what you [Laughter] huh I don't even know how bad it was huh he says there no such a thing as a goof doesn't even exist it's just fiction okay I told you I didn't know how bad it was I saw your laughter that it's already this is already the next level no such a thing it doesn't exist and and in me in mental space you can live that way you can live that way it's like huh it's like a it's like some physical thing that's slepping around with you you know somebody puts a washing machine on on your shoulders I'm a fine so I'm a washing machine now how did I get into what was I just saying ah so so the first the lived now in a state of G in a state of G you're going to see that the go it's it says by Mia is going to come on the Donkey through the donkey nobody can hire a a BMW from mashiah from all the gidm that we have in m and Lakewood nobody can hire a nice car from mashia H much smaller much smaller Reis than mhia go on very nice Vehicles mhia will only have a donkey couldn't imagine at least up a horse a camel okay I know didn't have cars for didn't make cars in the times of you mean the Middle East the Middle East you need a [Laughter] donkey so it says went on a dkey went on a dkey and the says was the same dkey was the donkey put his wife and children to go from to Egypt it was that donkey this bam had a m with a donkey so the discusses this the explains it in the it's all the same donkey the what does it mean the same dkey so this Dunkey is like is basically four and a half thousand years old where is this Dunkey I would like to see him and let's say there is a donkey that's 4 and a half thousand years old I mean God could do whatever he wants if he wants a donkey to be 4,000 4,000 years old you have in San Francisco trees that are 4,000 years old so may you want to make a but the is is that really so important and if mashiah comes on a new Dunkey not enough dun why is that so relevant to the story it's a the whole of was to elevate to elevate that's the whole in that there's three stages there's there's there's it's all the same Dy but in each stage of History the the Revelation could be more intense and more intense he himself doesn't go on the donkey he doesn't put y on the donkey he uses the donkey for the wood for the sword the he puts on Donkey cuz later he takes it off and he gives it to so the donkey is like an accessory it's used for for for your for for your tools for your instruments for your objects it says his wife and his children he puts on the donkey doesn't say about himself so he said it's three stages in the elevation of the is the beginning of everything is the first one to say there's Fusion in the world there's no war between religion and science there's no war between gods and there's no war in yourself either so the thear could become subservient could be part of your is already before it's going already it's like it's already a partnership the children are part of a father by himself he's going to be revealed through the through the is going to be revealed because when you understand and what what's the what's behind all of this when you understand the mechanism of theof and the you understand you're not dealing with evil you're dealing with a process that needs to be dealt with because the B has learned and acquired tools to protect itself back to my conversation I asked I asked what's what about the tattoo why does this kid need a tattoo this is a painful painful conversation why is what's the tattoo he said because in his neam what does the tatto represent that two represent safety it shows that I'm cutting off complet completely from that which reminds me that I'm the loser and what's the most extreme fashion if I could show my grandmother who says to Hill him twice a day that I really really am completely from A Different World the world ofos so this is where he completely finally in his mind this is safety now of course the tattoo doesn't create Safety Tattoo doesn't create safy and not putting on F doesn't create safety but you have to understand what theam does the worst thing that parents can do then is reinforce that lack of safety and he told me a story that he heard from the Bal it's quite a story this is not something you could tell somebody to do but it's a there was a kid who left hesite and unfortunately went very very far saw that he's get getting a tattoo and we know what the ti says about getting a tattoo right this is a very sensitive story and I'm not uh this is not a rule this is not a rule I'm just telling you the father decided that for him and his case his relationship with his son is it's an issue of survival for the child because of how he feels about himself so he told the boy I'm coming with you to get it and I'm paying for it and uh the father is standing there with the Son and the guy this happened in Israel they went to what's it called tattoo parlor it's called a parlor anybody here knows okay I think it's called a parlor I don't know okay UCLA they didn't have I see I see it also combined with like other kinds of things like people that want to sell their services for other things yeah yeah so he said he's a yeah I think it's called so he's in the kid is there in Israel the father's there with them standing there he's paying for everything and he's and the father is a with p with P so imagine the scene and the father is is is analyzing all because there's so many different options right so the father father's busy with the and the P what's the m in this what's the this as though this is his goal in life but what was he thinking one thing I need my son to associate me his father who's azv with safety not with danger and this was his only way couldn't sit and learn with him gamar come let's learn gamar he couldn't even give him Pizza couldn't even take him bowling bowling won't do it maybe when he's 8 years old bowling can help or pizza can help it's very good to have pizza you can eat the the the vegetables the kid will eat the pizza but at this point this was the only form of connection so he decided this is for him so he's standing and doing the and because he's paying for it he's became a and the guy the I'm not now talking I told you this is not a it's not a I'm not a I'm not giving any huh I'm not I'm not telling you to practice this at home I'm [Laughter] not no the is he probably did with his own R over was what's the get of the tattoo they're going to do is it going to be a male of this H the color the style the shape you can have a skeleton you can have a mug you can have not I'm this not my expertise but I see this Variety in the airport you could see this variety you do pro Israel you could write about Israel H you could do proas really okay yeah the gar says in about elim you know elim was one of the last kings so he wanted to be moed so what did he do I don't even know if I should say the g but you can look it up he put aem's name where by his bris I said the the of the Jewish peoplebe anyway the guy who's doing it starts he starts he starts and the father moves away a little bit because you know it's like uh and he hears the guy doing it he starts crying and he turns to The Boy The Boy says what happened I'm going to try not to cry he the boy says the guy says to the boy if I would have had a father like you I wouldn't be doing this here today I grew up where you grew up I didn't have a father like you that's what he told him told me the father told him the I said this boy today is aah without a tattoo youus what would be the instinctive response of the father in my house in my house right now the kid comes home Friday night and he doesn't come home with two he doesn't come home walking Friday night he comes home a different way Friday night and we all know what shabas is and the of shabas I'm talking about all this boy who suffering from the complex traum now the father walks over to says in my house you don't walk around like this shabas is not a day for this go find yourself a house of what just happened to the amigdala what did the brain the ne tell this boy the last place that I thought maybe was safe my bedroom it's a little place I have a little bed over there my mother my mother's cougle the last place it's also not safe bye-bye and the fascinating thing that no nobody the parents did not mean bad the father's on he's trying to do the right thing if you ask him the next day he says this is and he say we're talking about sincere people we're not talking you understand we have egotistical obnoxious people we're not talking about those people because it's much more subtle so I'm talking about now extreme situations but let's talk about less extreme situation everybody has aamus and every NE Shamus learns how to cope and Al says in t all the Midas that we call Mid essentially they're all attitudes emotions neam develops in order to cope and that includes anger it includes resentment it includes hatred it includes jealousy it includes arrogance it includes depression he says the first chapter of it includes laziness Laz laziness is also a culing mechanism when I'm when I have what to live for I'm not lazy if I'm excited about something I'm not lazy laziness is a great coping mechanism oh I'm lazy I'm not lazy there's just something Bo there's something bother me there's always something deeper fear tremendous fear and in every situation I'm going to respond differently because I already Drew Drew a map what's safe what what's not safe and it's not this is so nuanced and the self-awareness of this allows me to begin to understand what the neam is detecting as danger what it's telling the gof and the Goof are so tight because they're like one one entity so they respond immediately and there's no way the mind can communicate to the body without the nervous system the nervous system is the language that the body exp the body is not a philosopher the body is the body's language the way the Mind communicates to the body is through the nervous system so we start giving dasas to our neam to our go they never got the memo they don't sit through speeches you asked how do you how do we implement this we always have to know the language right if I'm talking to you French it's I may have a good french but you don't understand French you always have to know the language of theam of the Goof you have to understand it's language it's a different language frequ frequenc different frequency always you have to tune if to be sensitive to it so now this is the to understand a few of theas of the we came into this world not to ignore our to work with our to work with it to work with the to work so the Reb said since and were living in a state whatever the Goof says you have to listen because really the body picks up truth the body they say the body keeps the score the body picks up all truth you can't fool the body the Goof knows the Goof vast when the Goof is feeling tight when the Goof is feeling scared there's a the body is responding to something it's it's sensing something it's detecting something now we're not so trained with a weirdness of the body we're better trained go with into the mind forget about your goof but the integration is critical and that's the whole so every person has to know what s says you have to listen to S by he could trust s completely because the Goof was completely attuned it was refined so he could trust it completely we have to listen we have to listen to the G and save us and you understand that's why it's called NE so NE also has nees and has and has its primary element is mid its primary element is its emotional relationship to life that's why it's called Bas have a lot of emotion elephants have tremendous amount of emotions dogs a dog is called a k it says in is they call man's best friend even a mouse and a rat you'll forgive me there's emotion and you can see it you can manifest it never mind monkeys and chimpanzees there's so much connection over there and tribal connections and and attachment you know you could see the documentaries about how elephant moms mourn the death of their calfs it's very very moving you ever saw I once saw a video of elephants right there was drought and an elephant had a baby and the baby died baby couldn't walk so much and have the enough food and months later the the elephant family came back to the place that they left from and the mother stops by the by the SK it's all skeleton there's nothing uh there's nothing it's all skeleton already and she stops there and just stops and stands there you know the with her uh with her trunk rubber caressing it and then and then afterwards the whole the whole tribe comes like half the mother so I don't know what the elephant was feeling I don't know I don't know how to describe it but you see AB this intense emotion somebody sent me once a clip that there was a a group of of of monkeys and and and a monkey died and they're comforting each other they're all hugging each other it was they're all like hugging each other like comforting each other watching watching this Corps so the human yeah need so there there's deep emotional connection that's why it's called the mamalian brain there's a part of the brain that's that's considered like a mammal and then there's also is associated with in the brain it's called a prefrontal cortex that's the part of the brain that's less primitive it grows later it keeps on developing and that's the part that can actually make relaxed decisions sit back be very objective and think about long-term priorities short-term priorities delaying gratification what's right and wrong it can it can it can be patient it can be reflective introspective it has that ability to be extremely self-aware because it's not responding from a place of danger and Instinct it's responding from a place of reflection now we have to understand something and this is very important I mentioned it last time if somebody is going through or went through difficult situations so their amigdala may be triggered faster than most people especially if they're in constant danger or they're in a home that's a very dysfunctional home their amigdala may be on 24/7 24 hours a day because it's danger you're like like a soldier in Gaza you don't sit and and you don't sit and relax you're not in a joyful Serene place you're you're in a you're in a danger you're in a a danger zone you're in a war zone and some people even living here they're in a war zone they may not know it because if I grew up in a war zone the sound of bullets is normal so these people that at migdala may be triggered once a day may be triggered 24 hours a day may be triggered very very often and when that happens they're not in their prefrontal cortex they're not in a place of they're in a place of survival and therefore they are not capable of making those decisions that at all I'm not in that place and very often I come into a situation and that part gets triggered the danger zone and they don't even know it so if you felt unsafe in your home you weren't seeing you weren't soothed you weren't safe you weren't secure anything 50 years later that triggers that same lack of safety May migdala says danger danger danger danger you are not safe and suddenly your wife looks at you she doesn't know why you just go crazy what's a g what what's what what what just happened what happened you don't know you yourself don't know and if this has happening for so many years I'm so used to it there's no awareness around it there's no awareness this is instinctive this is the back to that knows what to do and what not to do now you have to hide what does hiding mean hiding doesn't necessarily going into a closet hiding means I can't connect I can't talk I freeze I'm paralyzed emotionally I disconnect I disassociate I'm a good person I don't want to be confrontational some neam they disassociate because they don't want to fight they don't want to fight they don't want to be confrontational they're too embarrassed maybe they're even kind so what do I do I disconnect if you disconnect emotionally you don't feel pain if you don't feel pain you're very you're safe and it happens to be my worst enemies will be those who are trying to make me feel so when you it works well because I don't have to feel I just have to learn well so I use the brain that analyzes and it's perfect but suddenly this same boy gets married and his wife doesn't want to hit a a whole day I don't know why she wants an emotional connection so she starts talking about emotions starts sharing his emotions he hasn't shared his emotions since 3 years old he hasn't felt his emotions since 3 years old he couldn't once that happened he couldn't feel emotion anymore to survive suddenly you want me to feel emotion so you're my enemy you're trying to put me back in a danger zone so suddenly his own wife who loves it becomes his worst enemy he loves he loves it in SCH because in SCH you can make a kidish and talk about other people's emotions or not talk about emotions you could just make a m against emotions so it works so in SCH he's the most popular guy in the world he makes The KES he runs everything he's the B he founded he does everything and he's actually a good he's actually a good guy but he never learned about his coping mechanism I just took one story there's another seven billion stories for every person there's another story and this is not you don't judge it you have to be sensitive to it cu the beh is actually trying to do the best it can but like every beam it can grow into a big monster the little puppy can become a German Shepherd well the puppy doesn't become a German Shepherd the small German Shepherd becomes a big German Shepherd and the small monkey becomes a gr monkey and the small chimp becomes a big CH and the Cub becomes a lion and the baby tiger becomes a tiger who was going to mle anybody who comes in its way so that's where the neam is big and aggressive and and powerful and frightful or very very small and Tiny and Afraid and usually the two work together the bigger the bite or the bark you know the more scar it is and the animals get very very scared it has a lot of logic but the logic is fueling survival that's the ver do you understand the logic fuels survival so it has a lot of logic and it fuels Comfort the logic could be very very deep very sophisticated but it's all focused on self-preservation and self gratification no matter what that's its job and you have to thank it too you have to thank it too I sometimes have to turn to my nef abam who's going crazy and I have to say wow thank you for working so hard for 51 years trying to keep me alive and I'm sorry that this is the type of reactions and emotions and instincts you had to develop in order to survive I'm sorry because it did it without it did it without it did it when I was four years old it can't afford to be open to be relaxed to be present to be loving to be compassionate it's not migdala there's a fire burning you don't talk about compassion when there's a fire in the house we'll talk about compassion tomorrow huh I thank him because he was doing the best he can with the tools he had to keep me alive that's why I thank him and he didn't charge he really tried hard now he may have developed very destructive patterns very destructive patterns he probably did I may be completely isolated I can't have an emotional relationship I may not be able to feel I may be disassociated I may be filled with anger filled with anger angry I'm just angry I'm angry I'm terribly angry and it's an interesting thing you see with people they tell you they don't feel I don't feel but anger they feel it's an interesting thing people will tell you I don't have emotions I don't feel everything is fine nobody nobody gets but suddenly anger oh my God it's an interesting thing because anger allows you to stay in hiding cuz anger means you're the sick person right behind it is I'm in a lot of pain that I don't know that I don't know about anger means you're the sick person my wife my kids my my my my Rabbi my community Hashem anger allows you to project all the pain on someone else and you always feel better it's it's it's a very powerful coping mechanism I can't control you I can't change you but I can be angry at you sometime people understand really means anger is the ultimate demonstration that I'm alone in the world I'm alone in the world I'm really alone in the world behind it is always pain so I thank it not because I want to live this way I thank it because I can appreciate what happened and the moment I do that I have if you don't understand youram you don't have that's the the key people always get annoyed some people get annoyed with these classes it's like what happened with tell no like stop all these it actually takes away our you know why because it does everything instinctively and I don't even know it's happening the moment you understand it you can say oh wow so it's actually not me it's not my Essence oh so I can choose different pathways but the body is not feeling safe I could talk to it this is called elevating your being educating it it's training an animal but it's not just an animal it's the human animal it's the animal that the Divine Soul chose to live with and to be there doesn't have it's even rooted in a higher place so Y and and the beh comes from a very very high place it comes from a world that's even higher than that's why goes down to it it's really a can do what a person can do the great great through so what's the summation of all of this for this we must understand its language like the father would the son yeah I could tell the son get out of my house you're making me sick and the father feels that way you're making me sick you're destroying our family there's no going to be no for our family my girl is not going to get into seminary in and my boy is certainly not getting into Yesa even a never mind in Israel I can do that and I understand I understand the father very well from our prefrontal cortex we can have compassion we can understand we don't have to we don't have to judge now now we have to respect the fact that sometimes I'm not living there I'm in I'm in I'm in a very Alert state I'm anxious I'm in a lot of anxiety so you don't tell anxiety stop being anxious try it out see how good it well it works because the the the body the nervous system doesn't go to shim it actually does but it listens in a different way it doesn't look for my words it looks for my body language it wants to know how calm I am it wants to know if it could trust me right the most important thing in communication it's called metac communic a it's not the words it's body language it's safety I got a very moving compliment I don't know why I'm saying this to you but I'm saying this to you I finished the interview with him it was like three hours so uh he said you know you you really bring out the best in me you you make I say things that I usually would not say so I was very moved by that and he thought and he said you know why you provided safety I felt safe to talk now he talking about somebody who's not uh 2 years old somebody's doing this for 40 years and I I understood the value of that do we provide safety for people to talk yeah it it's not what I if I say you're safe you're safe you're safe that's what theas monsters did they came and they said we're the Israeli Army open the door right they spoke in Hebrew I can't provide safety through words I provide safety through presence in the says that the is he wrote down basically the that he had with his students with his so he has a over there he said how can you put into a sa for from our countries they used to come to me he they come to me these are words there was a conversation of love between us and they revealed to me all the secrets of their heart and their brain and so I once told somebody if you read a per in and you don't feel a conversation of love you obviously didn't understand it because the author himself wrote that he's recording a I know some of you learned T and the t is an intense if you don't hear in every peric you didn't understand what he said because he himself wrote in the introduction there was a conversation of love I didn't force them to talk to me they didn't need to talk to me they love talking they reveal he say doesn't say some of their secrets everything that was inside of them how do you do that how do you do that with somebody you can only do that if you're safe if I'm going to tell you things and I'm going to feel judged and denigrated and then I'm going to feel at some point I'm going to stop this only comes from providing safety that's the language that the Goof can relax that m so when I'm talking to my child if I'm not providing safety he won't be able to connect if this is a if the kitchen is the danger zone I'm not going to stay in the kitchen I'm going to go somewhere else and I'll say this even in the same isue with your spouse you know we talk to our spouse if she's not feeling safe and you're not feeling safe you're not going to talk you're going to yell at each other and even if you're both nice people and you're both nice people you're not going to yell at each other on the outside you let yell at each other ins sight I told the women this week in the Tuesday class something I somebody shared with this with me said why is it two people are in a room yeah a small room and they're angry at each other so they start yelling why you yelling you're right here as you see a husband and a wife or whatever they're yelling you're right here the answer is physically you're close to each other but emotionally you're distant what do you do when somebody's very far you scream you know that they're far from you so you scream you know why you're screaming not because their ears can't hear because their heart can't hear you're trying to overcome the gulf and reach them so you're yelling what happens when there's love in the room you see everybody speaks quietly you start whispering why why you Whispering why you Whispering there's no bug here the FBI is not here the mad and the CIA are not here why you Whispering you whisper right I love you you whisper you whisper say because when you're in touch with you know why because you can hear me because your heart can hear me so it's fascinating you see how it works yeah you why so why are we yelling we don't know but we're yelling because you're not here I want you to be here and I think by yelling I'll get you here so when when when there is this state of connectivity the animal Soul could start hearing things and this is what he's now going to say in this in this in the m i wasn't St trying to about the this is this is the the foundation of of of self of the inner work of connection no are you gonna ask me a ah you mean yeah a log he brings from a log that's not catching you trying to make a bonfire I know I know per in he says a log that doesn't catch on fire what do you do you Splinter it you Splinter it right you cut it into little pieces and then it'll catch on fire so brings that's what you mean yeah the Goof doesn't catch on fire when you Splinter it you give it oxygen you let the fire penetrate when we hear the word b is talking a certain situation it's called means as he puts it the shell has become so thick and so dense I have no access to me your complete dullness of heart my heart is complete jail and it's thick there's not even a communication with my heart and he says and at that moment you have to be very decisive with that part that is completely eclipsing you it's going to have to be opened up it's going to have to be broken down into pieces going to have to be splintered because it's not allowing any access to the self and you have to be very very precise and concise with how dysfunctional it has made you it has made me I have to be able to call it and call it out on its name how dysfunctional how it stripped me from my humanness it stripped me from my awareness it stripped me from my sanity it stripped me from my sobriety and it stripped me from my dignity it's a process of splintering that is completely Redemptive it's completely it's completely uhp it's emancipation it's literally you're my heart is in jail and there's a lock and another lock and another lock and a gate and another gate and a security system and because because whoever built this prison didn't want me my heart to get out of prison it can create it constructed such a security prison I don't even know there's a heart anymore so I don't even have I'm not even connected to that part takes me out of I run right back I run right back the only place I know here without splintering I can't even begin the the process at the core of it is compassion at the core of it but I have to know if I'm so so so dysfunctional I really have to like you have to take the bull by its horns what does he say there you have to call yeah he says you have to say what his words you hear the how much longer will you eclipse the infinite light that I really am and that's me oh that that's good and it it may not even it it may not even respond to that but if I'm consistent and I'm authentic and it knows it'll be able to open up but it's not because I'm trying to it's not about self-destruction it's self Liberation it's self-emancipation it's the most compassionate thing you can do put it in its place it's the most compassionate thing okay so now let's learn a little inside another few minutes and uh and see the V I think now it'll become clear third line in you have to understand how the works its natural comprehension is not going to be Transcendence it's not going to be divine spirituality it understands gash and meaning it's an animal it's focused on self-preservation so it understands things but its focus is which means its language is relating to things that are tangible to its life and will give benefit to its life whatever that means it may be an intellectual by Nature there are curious animals Curious George and it may like to do mathematical uh like to you know do jigsaw puzzles and mathematical riddles that's its fascinates curiosity or it's very utilitarian it's very practical very pragmatic it may even become a master of Sciences in a very very real and tangible way this is what it's looking for whatever it is to satisfy its curiosity to get a good career I'm intellectual by nature but essentially the focus is survival whatever that means to shabas and sometimes people become very very scholastically successful for validation the founder of ifs his name is Mr Schwarz Richard Schwarz so I had an interview with him so he told me that he lived in a he a family of doctors his father was a doctor Brothers if he wasn't to become a doctor huh then he needs a doctor yeah like the good old Jewish comedian who's already on the yov Maza also known as Jackie Mason would say right if your son if you have a Jewish boy and he's normal a doctor if he's a little slow a lawyer if he's very slow an accountant but besides that so sometimes yeah Dr Schwarz was telling me your whole Scholastic achievement is simply to get validation it's called to give Nas If you're going to do XYZ you're going to give Nas as we say you're to your father to your mother so sometimes that also becomes a coping mechanism we have to understand so behind all it's gness is what a worthless a sense of worthlessness yeah and it it happens quite often it's a sense of worthlessness I'm not going to be a person that's an extreme it may not be so so extreme but but has a lot of se but ultimately it SE relates to it relates to the is not on its own to Divine comprehension what do mean Divine comprehension a comprehension of elus when we talk about elus now we're going very a what's what's ausus is the inner rhythm of existence that's behind everything but it's a language of transcendence it's not the it's the the shab doesn't know what what do you want from me for me I'm hungry I'm thirsty I need a little covet I need a little attention I need a little money I need a little validation I need to feel safe I need to feel comfortable if you can use God for that I'll use him I don't care I'll use a tissue box I'll use God but it's a different God that's aam is God Carl Mark said right the religion is the op opium for the masses you give me Tylenol give me go God turn God into a Tylenol is good it's fine I have a headache fine but the it's that's what it is it's what's is the before the yes elus is the no thingness of existence elus is the m of of of infinite of infinity the doesn't I don't know what you're talking about what Infinity I need to survive I don't need to be infinite needs to work hard to communicate to the this is quite a said this I'm put him so he usually he wouldn't speak like this I'm just you see different people you tell them I don't know what you want not people that can learn they could learn they could learn they'll come alive they'll be alive why it has a beginning it has a middle and it has an end give me a sh give me a para tell me how the sh gour the and they're they're alive they alive and it's it's not to be minimize it but you start talking about what are you what are you talking about he says why they never they never felt a they never felt it it's not again it's not it's you have to be open to your not only don't have a g they don't know what you're talking about I can't have a g if I don't know what you're talking about I don't in this it's like you're talking about things you don't know about I don't know about like I I need a beginning I need a middle I need an end you know see this the structure is very different give me a beginning give me a middle give me an end give me something I can grasp I could see and tell me fine what's the and that's it talk about if you if you're right somebody asked how do I know I understand a little I relate to it I said you'll open up yeah you'll start reading and you'll start feeling ecstasy and you'll be grateful for this so it means it's resonating you're getting it the ne is an ecstasy from it's like it's it's it has it sores you hear a niggan right and you're in a different world like wow don't stop the niggan when the hears don't stop don't stop it doesn't need anything else we say you didn't know your friendship is sweeter than all the Honeycombs in the world all the sushi in the world all the money in the world doesn't come close to one moment of a because a is the source of all Bliss where does all Bliss come from the Bliss we have in our world yeah from is a little fragment a little fragment of the source of bliss the mucker of remember there's no Bliss in the world doesn't come from so which is when somebody feels their soul it's like that's huh you want the sheare say 24 hours a day seven days a week but I have to work aam too I can't just give a Shear I also have enough to work on you think you're the only one who has enough was and a very funny person and the first time he came to he jumped he was athletic he jumped on the window seal and he jumped in through the window looks at him he says linkite chop off my left side you hear asks the bat in other words get rid of it I'm done so the AL was wearing sat in for most of the day he was wearing up in a and he was in he went into Aus he closed his eyes he like went into a spiritual TR so to speak for a few minutes and then he opened his eyes he looked at him up from fence he was on come down from the window you know you could land and then he said these words in y he said the says thei says we say in the morning you give life to everything the too the left side too you be like give life to it yeah he said tap it off give it oxygen give it Divine oxygen give it Divine oxygen but how do you begin this it's a diff the is a different language the it's a language of when it when it hears about Aus it's alive cuz that that's its that's its uh its nature that's its fabric the say you have people they don't have don't even have because is powerful in them and this is a very ad word you're talking here about theen who could be big they like the structure Judaism that they can Master you understand I can control it again we're not talking in it this is not a NE we're not talking negative or judgmental but this is something the animal Soul can good if it's a certain type of animal Soul it it it even becomes it's gak there's a lot of intellectual stimulation right just like people who they're amazing Mathematics Algebra trigonometry physics astronomy Science Biology and they really really excel in it this is but essentially I'm telling to put usually but essentially you didn't go away from you relate to the Judaism that you could control more it's very tangible so the animal says okay I'm fine with this now this is it's it's a fine it's a fine thing for the neab to do much better than a lot of other stuff but essentially this is gobl on its own the doesn't understand anything that's not that's not brute crash or at least it's not physical two levels the if it's not don't talk to me if it's not crash don't talk to me but then at least it has to be gashi it has to be tangible I don't need it to be is brute at least me it has to be it has to have physical dimensions those were the you know what an up leg is up leg means it doesn't settle inside of me and can CLP you know what a CLP is doesn't stick in language yeah huh clap it means it's ridiculous so he says some people the whole CL it doesn't it doesn't connect there's no glue it's like you're talking Chinese you're sitting in a room somebody's 10 years is talking Mandarin at some point can clap you may be intelligent I don't get it everything think the is so smart of course of course we're going to see so here you have it's an intellectual but this element it it just doesn't resonate it doesn't resonate he may learn it and learn it and read it and read it but it doesn't resonate it's not like ah the Gak the gmak you can't force this it's not a force Comes Alive comes comes alive with with you have what's as we said it focuses life survival and therefore it loves everything that will contribute to it and it's afraid of anything that will cause him Uprising and will cause him to uh to be detached from that which he perceives it perceives as life and pleasure which is the world of the gashi world whatever that means for a person for one person it's food for another person it's validation covered attention money whatever it is but I am very em the animal is going to be very emotional about it and it's going to have both love and fear and therefore it will create protectors in other words it will avoid anything that will compromise its ability to be able to be a functional animal and as a result of that I may create entire mechanisms of Defense because of my fear because of my fear to be torn away from whatever I need to be torn away in order to be aamus I am going to construct defense mechanisms and I'm also going to create those mechanisms in order to be able to pursue what I have to pursue they could be so much manipulation in my life exploitation control but all of that is one thing it's rooted in the AA and the year I'm afraid of certain things and I crave it's crave and love because this is this is what I perceive I need this is the physical life that I need this is includes crushes on people crushes on things it includes all types of cravings and all types of fears and we all construct very very impressive systems in our brain that control and navigate when you're having an intense emotion towards me towards anybody else very positive very negative there's something behind it it's not Stam it didn't come from nowhere you threaten me you actually make me at peace you I like you I really don't like you I'm going to get close to you I'm not going to stay away from and the same is true Parts in me that I like that I don't like we create all of these things because the lives with thisen this year it's afraid of being pulled away and taken away from anything that will make it less safe that will cause that will cause a danger the it's very intense an animal loves and an animal is afraid an animal runs and an animal runs away it recoils but it's all Focus focused on the tangible and the physical and the material that I can describe as important for my safety important for my gratification just like there's what's called are natural innate emotions they're Primal Primal emotions that are not born from intellect they're not born from meditation from contemplation and then there's that are like born from we explained earlier that all Midas are rooted in a place that that's deeper than SE it's like children parents bring children to the world but the soul doesn't come from the parents comes through the parents the same is true with mid but a mid itself you have like a baby without the father and mother doing the work a baby is not born the is like the parents the father's called the mother's called Bina ABA IMA and then you have the mid are called the T the children the father needs to do the work it's his b it's contemplation more awareness more contemplation until you develop an emotion that's called are Midas that are more ingrained you still always need some awareness but it requires a minimal amount of awareness because this is just ingrained it became a survival Instinct it became a coping mechanism it became an emotion that doesn't requ also has these two things you have a that is more sophisticated it developed priorities it thought about things it contemplated things and then you have the mid of the this is the map that it Drew up very very early on and it's ingrained in its nature this you love this you hate this we go to this we stay away from this is danger zone this is not danger zone this is a place I could be present it's a place I can be present so usually the is it's all the map of that mdala very early on and it's governing our emotions but he says don't underestimate develops a whole philosophical thing some people some are very philosophical and even theological and as you say even spiritual understand that guarantees it survival it just it knows I have to survive and I'll do whatever I can whatever I can and every Mida is fueling that it's fueling self-preservation that's what it wants that's what it needs and that's what it does it does it very very well all of its instincts are around that huh the question is which level of the you talking about as we said there's that's what he says there's the of there's of the and that come from he says he says that's why you'll have a if it doesn't go into depth in the goodness of it that it should stand they won't have a but sometimes he's not about he's not using but you still you still pull to something because the whole it's understanding and it's mid are focused only on that which gives me survival physical and material I could become submerged in it my heart is drawn into it so the heart often becomes plugged I'm not sensitive anymore to the inner music of life I'm just like living by root you know they have in different states of of of of there's different fre they say different frequencies you could be living in right there's the frequency of guilt there's the frequency of Shame there's the frequency of fear these are frequencies very very low frequencies there's higher frequencies there's the frequency of love there's the frequency of connection there's the frequency of Serenity there's the frequency of uh of of transcendence huh comp compassion higher frequencies so there comes a situation the heart just becomes plugged I'm just now busy with with with with with just survival I can't my heart is not present I'm not emotionally present because the neam has just been focused on one thing and that becomes my entire story and I'm not even aware of anything I was like I wake up I do this I do this I go to work I do this like I I just I it just becomes like a a computer program I'm not alive anymore Le the heart is stuffed the heart is plugged it's also a survival mechanism of the and he beings a I think it's I think [Music] it's I know it's like finish in a few minutes I believe right Kam that brings out the whole inion says the wine of a of a of a country was called rash says its wine was amazing the wine of parusa and the water of the river called theum it hijacked the T because the T basically they uh they got indulged in it actually says they became submerged in this they were they were looking for the for the benefit of this wine and this water and it it it hijacked it hijacked their souls the says is one of the great he ended up in this region called near the river called and he became addicted to this wine and his learning was forgotten from him and when he came back to his house he stood up to learn and he took out of and he was holding by the's and he made a mistake and instead of he said their hearts became deaf and they all understood his situation and said they daved for him and everything came back to him everything came back to him so but it's interesting also the words his heart became deaf it was a mistake of but what was the mistake the mistake was describing what happened what happened was I'm not hearing it anymore I'm not I'm not my antennas are shut down you don't hear there's a certain when the ne is alive there's a music that you hear creation is a symphony you hear you're sensitive to it you sit down with somebody Your Heart is Open Your Presence to the energy it's everyone has an energy field right there the energy that you're manifesting from hasem but at this point my heart is just plugged I'm just trying to cope you know how sometimes you come home you're exhausted you're tired right the kids are screaming all you could think about is getting to bed it's not a moment of presence what if my whole life becomes that my whole life becomes that the LA is utum so now it expresses itself in how does this animal Soul live it only pursues one thing the only actions that are valuable are actions that will pursue the material and crft the only things that will avoid is that will which will contradict it the whole Realm of the whole realm of Holiness I don't understand it I don't even have a feel for it first of I don't relate to I can't understand it but even a feel I don't have a feel for it and even po Mish it's just it doesn't mean anything to me I I stay away from it I'm not sensitive to that whole world you know what I mean an example would be right if I have a garden here in m in my backyard but the deer come and they eat it up that's their data they come in the morning they have beautiful meals 4: 5 in the morning when we're waking up they eat breakfast already they're after DAV they do before the SI they so somebody decided he's going to put up a big sign and he put up a big sign even nobody's allowed to steal it's my garden it's exclusively my garden he says this is mine it's not yours and I'm not not not what happens when the deer come in the morning they see the sign and what do they do they're like oh yeah he's right he's right let's go to somebody else's Garden then it's a struggle no you don't expect that the deer his inion is to co- eat you don't want him to eat build a fence you understand the V another person a person comes to a a fence he doesn't need a fence the sign is stronger than a fence the fence he could climb over the sign he can't climb over it says in the fence of the Jewish people are roses so the says he gives an example he says gets married this is gets married and he comes home and his wife says tiam there's blood and he says there's no physical fence but the fence of is stronger it's a different type of fence a moral fence you can't expect a horse or the donkey or the deer to stop because there's a moral fence it's not what it job is now let's understand we have that inside of us we have that inside of us there's that part of me I need a wall there's no wall I don't relate to this that language doesn't exist also in in it's a and in also it relates to that which is beneficial that which is not beneficial the is a whole different language it's a language of truth of authenticity of divinity so he says he finishes this this is just the way we're created but there an it has what we call a prefrontal cortex if you can get it into that space it could listen you have to talk to it this is shouldn't run away it should talk to the neam and tell the neam I'm here I want you to survive I also want to survive now let's talk what survival is let's talk let's talk about life theam once it has that Safety and Security and the will take care of it the neas is open to hear all the truth in the world it's not e it's not bad it's not evil and then it understands suddenly that its whole purpose is to serve as aik for the ne there's a hierarchy it wants a hierarchy the hierarchy is the Divine Soul the animal soul and the body and the moment you want to give it to explain the hierarchy the animal soul is very happy he wants to bead the puppy doesn't want to run the house the cuup doesn't want to run the house the horse doesn't want to be alone the horse wants a horse master wants a Horse Ride doesn't want to be abused but the horse is very sensitive when you get on a horse you know hores right away know if you're in control or you're not in control the worst thing for a horse is when you're afraid of it and you don't know what to do and then you give it give it to the the horse doesn't know doesn't know where I'm coming the horse doesn't have that you need the horse needs you to tell the horse mate then the horse will go will go much faster than you can that's like theas so it's a powerful horse says this in the the horse will take you to places you can't go but you need to tell it where we're going and you need to give it the security you need to give it the confidence I know exactly where we're going and then the horse will go and take you the horse is good on its legs the horse is not good for figuring out the destination of existence that's not what it needs the same is through the we put On's unnecessary pressure it has to figure out life and and has to figure out eternity the poor animal Soul leave me alone I just need to go to the bathroom leave me alone I'm good for going to the bathroom that's what I'm good don't tell me to decide what life is about but that what it does so decides this is life the needs to take control when it takes control the if it could be a but you have to speak to it it has a mind has a beautiful mind it's a beautiful mind but it's the mind of an animal and the mind of an animal needs to be spoken to in the way that it can relate to if you try to override it and you say you don't exist and byebye I'll do my own thing and you make you're going to be the most refined husband in the world and 20 minutes later you explode in Anger what happened cuz Yankee didn't say by the mail you made last night you learn M for the 20th time you decided you're going to be an a person there was one problem your neam wasn't learning and not even Tanya was was hungry and there soup so we have to talk to it and we have to get it he says he says you have to you have to start with you have to talk to it there's a m called is a rational Soul it can understand truth it can understand all these stuff it can even smile and then if the ne takes you seriously it can relax and you know what happens then what happens is it doesn't have to live in all the Midas that it developed it can choose connectivity over isolation it can choose presence over Detachment it can choose courage over fear it can choose trust over mistrust love over hatred it could start choosing things it doesn't want to be in a place of danger where the whole world is a crazy sick place and where I have to fight with everybody and I can't trust anybody wants love like any animal wants love but it never knew how to get it it did the best it can but the always remains in touch with truth and reality and knows the truth of who you are and didn't develop coping mechanisms the ne is not a coping mechanism just like God there's not a coping mechanism God is truth it's reality you understand is not a coping mechanism it's not a machine every is alive it's the derivative of infinite Consciousness do you guys like this as much as I like it huh huh more okay this is let's face it you have to 400 times the pr the pra very good very good the pr taught his student 400 times because he understood how a pra Works how a mule not only an animal a mule petted fed and you know what it says yeah said what's ped he's missing s ped to them is like he says huh so put yeah we learned it it's not it's it's 126 but is without is was expecting somebody to come in and the student saw that he was distracted mentally so he wasn't T unbelievable so so so all this has to be taught could be very patient if it feels safe it will be patient because he was a worked out person he was a worked out person presence is not easy the one of the most famous cop is don't be present because if there's a fire you're not present you run you run you always run I'm in a conversation with you what's my phone say I can't talk to you there's no exclusivity there's no intimacy exclusivity and intimacy requires safety right one presence I can't do that if I'm in a war zone you're not allowed to do that it's danger some yeah it's I'm hyper Vigilant I'm out of breath and that's my lifestyle I don't even know why so we have all these names add d d ADHD with all all good but a lot of it is at an early age I had to disassociate or I had to go into a place of being hypervigilant so you give me every name in the world ADHD it was a coping mechanism of the neas which became habitual and then my chemicals agree and then it becomes a philosophy and now I'm diagnosed for eternity yeah I am ADHD now I may be ADHD that's fine and there's also milus in it well I was once giving a speech at shabas and there was a a group from Yesa RAB kish's Yesa Waterberry they were here for so a bunch of them came to here you know I don't always speak short unfortunately as some of you know today's she can prove it too and uh it it was a pretty long D and one of them was sitting in front right in front and I happened to know him he was diagnosed with every ADHD symptom in the world there was not a symptom of of uh of attention deficit that he wasn't Ding and he sat there listening like this glued and he really took it in and afterwards he came over to me and he said you know you could have gone another six hours and I would have stayed I said you you're a quintessential ADHD everybody knows your reputation precedes you he looks at me and he says people don't understand if somebody is talking and he's just talking I can't sit for three seconds if you hit the spot I could sit for 12 hours if you hit the spot I could sit for 12 hours you understand so this whole diagnosis he says it's not so simple if it's not stimulating a certain part in me you're right I can't sit for 3 seconds I don't know how to force myself to sit in a boring situation I don't know how to do it but if you're stimulating that part if you're going in I'm in I'm done the same is true with so he says there's it's called you don't only go out of that place it's all reversed everything was involved in is now is now K food is not bad exercise is not bad work is not bad sleeping is not bad relationships are not bad they're actually all part of now the is a k it's a vehicle it's a channel there's a there's a hierarchy there's a connection the was given the power three words is from the word you first have to clarify like shabas does you're not all to do right you have to identify this is this is sift out you have to be from the word it has to be clear this is a destructive coping mechanism I got it this is a good coping mechanism right this is good you have to be M this is helping our life this is destroying our life this is bringing you closer to the people you want to be this is bringing you further from the people that's the first thing then there's come from the word the word to make things clear refine to refine it what does it mean to refine it to refine it means you take the very exper and also from the word to purify it to clarify it once you what it is and you separate the from the what's what's Theus now you could begin the work of refining it and then it's all sublimated it's all elevated through working in it it gets elevated to the working of it once it's worked on then like we through all your ways you know him all your ways not just when I'm my whole life there's a relationship there's connection now the heart is not plugged anymore because now the Animal soul is not living in isolation from the Divine Soul it's not like a schizophrenic um two separate people there's a constant relationship there's a connection that's what right all these things that we've been we're discussing so this is only through you need why because could understand but you need to talk its language you must talk its language yeah that's why in I always try to give why do I give metaphor let's just learn the go on the answer is because your understood it before the she the point of the she Isam should understand how's misunderstand he start saying do me a favor give me my phone let me check the next clip oh RAB has a clip okay is there a joke it's a joke okay next do me a favor let me get a cookie next I I have a bank to deal with have a mortgage I have to wish you know what's happening in my house boom boom boom it's very nice if have nothing nothing to do I'll sit and learn K I'll learn about Ma and B and sag and andum and you'll be happy very good but I'm not an intellectual so I'm not interested I'm not a Mystic so I'm certainly not interested yeah I'm just trying to help my life and I got anxiety so we'll stop hacking me with because doesn't help my anxiety you understand theam does care about anxiety soam has to understand howas helps anxiety that's what it needs to know and it does why because atus means that you can experience all of life as an extension of Oneness the anxiety is coming because I'm living in a very very unsafe place cuz my are not connected I'm living a very fragmented life I'm a very scared I'm very scared I'm very scared I'm not present my heart is not open I can't be relaxed I can't be in a joyous state so all the M that we give that I try to give because I'm trying to talk to my and I hope by me talking to my neam your neas might listen it might not it might say don't confuse our animal Souls but maybe it's going to listen I had a his name was he was a of the so he had a Min when he would DAV he would translate words in yish constantly he would translate words in Yiddish so somebody asked him what do you what are he said English but was from Russia pahar a city called pahar so he said my NE you understand the word I'm not that for my my knew everything before daving I'm daving to talk to my the understands yish doesn't understand the language it knows the language but it understand you have to talk to it in yish but it's an approach how do you talk to the so it's not just a language issue it's it's the whole it's the whole idea of language what speaks to it neur linguis huh neural Linguistics yeah so Linguistics is Al part of the is another it's another subject that I could learn Linguistics it's a very G subject so there's no in life that the can't connect to the everything could be sublimated that's the the question is the Consciousness the perspective what is it about that's why the is not evil it's not evil it exists and it's work in progress everyone it's work in progress but it's work in progress how by communicating with it how do I communicate with it I must know its language if I override it by using the language it's nice but you're not talking and that's why so many people get frustrated they learn they want to become better Jews right some of you know this very well you learned for years and you learn about clipp and more and more and and then you start fasting and then you start fasting and then you're doing these and that and that and then you come home and your wife says something and boom all your T went straight down the sewer system all your SW your kid suddenly is having an experience a challenge and everything you learned it's down the drain and you feel horrible with yourself and now you feel guilty so now you get more angry and now you feel more guilty so now you start killing yourself more at this point you're miserable what was missing you're a wonderful person Tak a wonderful person but you need to know the language of your NE you need to know your goof your is responding to perceived danger if your kid is not going to give youas your family is going to be destroyed there's going to be no for your family you are frightened your father is going to tell you that you are his nightmare you are his night you're not like all your brothers You're not like all your brothers I was once in a house in a beautiful Community not far from community so the Father the Z comes over to me and he says you want to know what is Jacobson shows me on the shows me on the wall of letter he has 14 kids and the letter says that we are making never to use a smartphone never it's not coming into our it it's not coming into our home and they all all the kids sign and the father says is th 14 kids 13 kids signed 13 kids signed that they're not they're not having they're not looking they're not they don't have a smartphone not at work they're going to use it between six and seven you know when you don't make kdes but I see one of the boys is not there one of the sons I happened to have a relationship with him so I asked him why are you the only one that didn't sign f is G father everyone else gives you father Nas he says I was the only that didn't want to lie he says I'm the only Honest One [Laughter] basically me he said I was the only one who didn't want to lie I don't think you should give Nas to your father by lying to him that's what he said it was such a powerful lesson I'm not advocating that you shouldn't sign letters that you don't have an iPhone if you can get rid of your iPhone you'll be spend more time with your wife and kids besides all the other things that's not my point my point is you have to have the language how you talk to the it has its own language and it's language that's why theb is explaining this you have to know about it so you learned you learned about and and you're retired and you go to the mik and it's and it's but the neam needs to get the memo the neam gets the Memo by communicating with it and how do I communicate with it where I understand its anxieties I understand its fears I talk to it and you need to make a accessible to the that's what means the beh isain and when the beh understands oh then the horse will take you to places you can't go on your own it's not just the needs the the also needs the one of the says needs it works both ways it's a it's a marriage it's a relationship your wife needs you you need your wife I'm not going to say who's the who you'll decide that on your own huh maybe one day one day depends or both both have but the point is we need it's a symbiotic relationship everybody have a beautiful day and a wonderful day will continue this m Monday morning 7:45 a.m. chabas is our regular schedule we're going to learn on chabas huh I feel back thank you that means a lot that means a lot I saw you took it all in huh thank you so much yeah I know they made a mistake I told them too late it's not their fault I think this rain rain says in there's a about it says it says one place and says we're going to go on the clouds of Heaven to to another says go on a Dunkey not on clouds so the says yeah right so he TI Z from the word z z so if there was already a zakos so it's if not you have to still work through the yeah insurance because heke alive so the donkey alive like theal says when you have M it's not always physical it could be metaphoric so yeah that's the metaphor that it's the same we're working with the same gashi in's time it was one stage of development m is already before is already a whole higher stage and mhia is the ultimate so you have three stages in the in the elevation of the G you haveu you have MOS which is already m is before the era of mat and then you have m is the end the end goal over there it's all through the is it says also yeah is also was the three but this idea of is that is going to be through the one of the the soul will get its nutrients from the Goof will be revealed the true sh of the Goof so the will be now gets its own Ma and the Goof gets M through the and through food which also has a in it then so to knock the Goof not only is it against everything but it's also completely misunderstanding the whole of the fusion between the means that all the work we put into the Goof is eternal now there's a thing why why is it one of the 13 principles let's say won't be you die you go to G I understand it means there's consequence there's a God yeah it means a difference between Hitler and the victims of Hitler I understand a difference between a murderer and a victim I get that difference between those who perpetrated 911 and the victims of 911 difference between the Kamas who get killed and and and and innocent people who got killed we understand but why is that such a so one of the answers is because we work a whole sh we explain that work with the gof with theab it's all going to die you put on work for 120 years it's all dead it's all gone becomes f for the worms is like this we learn about if you take a if you steal something you make a so there's a Kyan right you just have to pay back but it says if it's a if it's a change that's revertible back it's not called a so since the Goof dies but it's a the change of death is going to come back with because the DNA stays alive and the L is there even the time of it's not an absolute so is also Eternal that's yes I'm saying all the it's not you just did it for a few years that itself is an [Music] eternal that's right the is not the ultimate but the thean holds it is the ultimate in other words the with has a whole mitah R holds that the is the says is the the r spoke from the philosophical perspective is higher than gashi the r is more consistent with Caba where the gashi ultimately is higher than the it's interesting it's different perspectives you start off with the being higher than the you end off with whatever s says you listen to because the Goof the Goof knows better says that the were t to the they were subservient in Prophecy to the so whatever s says the Goof has a that even the doesn't have don't say of the women will be more that's the same idea that the women will be higher than the men the and the femininity will be the the Mas to masculinity yeah it's going to be dominant because the world is not going to be based on dominance the world will be based on Oneness you understand when the world is based on dominance so then masculinity is more dominant when reality is based on Oneness not on dominance so automatically femininity prevails women are more spiritual yeah what's the of masculinity and femininity yeah masculinity works in the place of dominance says right the language of femininity is not the language of Conquest it's the language of Oneness so in a world of dominance of Galos masculinity is prevails but that's Galos in a in a in in a world of Oneness it's not dominated by dominance it's dominated by non-dominance it's dominated by Oneness so that's femininity prevails that's why today you see that D is not it used to be even by Jews you can't compare Judaism to other cultures but women in previous generations had this you know yeah was was so to speak a different status men right yeah same thing they didn't make the women didn't fail when it CES to the spies when it came to theel all the major mistakes that the Jews made the women stayed away from by the M they came first they gave first the women first so the Mish they were first and the agel and the M they stayed away from that's why they came into much more yeah much more the women were more prepared so so so so but but the closer you get to which is the more and more you see that the whole today has to be only with the women and through the women other like in a marriage the man goes does his own thing and the woman you know takes care of the gash that's not that model doesn't exist anymore not successful anymore for because the whole to a symbiotic relationship between the man and the woman and the real is the man could get a lot of guidance from his wife that's the that's the EMS right like you know and like I know and like you know shus Miram 14 years someone you can work from me for seven years yeah what do you see what you saw in her if he loved her so much if he loved her so much so then seven years should have been like 70 years not like a few days if you love somebody so much so so so you're waiting you're waiting so the waiting is much longer the is sometimes people love her because they love themselves saw all those seven years all seeven all those seven years is what happened when he came to the well she was shepherding the flock asks since when do you give a little girl sign the answer is L didn't have sons so ra was responsible for all that sign later rash says later because then yeah Bon of is later then he didn't have so that's why yov blessed him and he had all these so that means when when when when Yakov became when Yakov came into the house he took over all the Sheep it says he was was so had seven years of he was very happy for her he was thinking about her because she finally had she didn't have to be a slave for her father she didn't have to slave away for her father he was benefiting by he could be here for his wife when you really when you really appreciate and love somebody you feel it as a privilege to be there for them it's a privilege it's not when before he was a re when his father-in-law was still alive so he was once so had so he was once walking home and there was a with n with questions Non-Stop and uh my brother told say the turned to [Laughter] him was still alive the's daughter is waiting for me so you have to sometimes say the V of me shem's daughter is waiting for me this class is brought to you by the yeshiva.net please help us continue the classes make even a small contribution at w.the yeshiva.net donate