Cain's Tears - Ari Abramowitz: The Land of Israel Fellowship

shalom my friends rarely have i had a harder time deciding what i wanted to share with you as the torah portion of breishit because this parsha is so rich it is so filled with mysteries and secrets and beauty and it's not fair that we have so little time to swim in these rich waters you know i often say that if you want to understand the deepest aspects of the jewish people you study the exodus from egypt which is the genesis story the origin story of our nation and if you want to understand the deepest aspects of mankind you study the torah portion of breishit the genesis story of mankind of the world so as i read through the torah portion on shabbat i was sitting with my wife and my daughter and one part spoke out to me with particular relevance to what's happening on a personal level on a global level around the whole world right now and it was the story of kain and hevel cain and abel and we know the story well they were the first two sons of adam and adam and eve kind was a shepherd and abel was a worker of the land he was a farmer and abel offered the best of his produce and god accepted his offering and cain's offering was not of the best of his flock and god did not favor it as he favored his brothers now the reason i wanted to talk about this today is because cain's tragic and mistaken response to this dark moment in his life is still echoing throughout history even to this day now having been born in america and being a fourth generation texan my eyes are very much on the disturbing events that are unfolding in america today which are uh having ripple effects throughout the world and i think a lot of the attributes are really from this portion of kine his response is very much reflecting what's happening in america as well so kind of offers a sacrifice and it was rejected he must have seen his brother's sacrifice miraculously accepted by the creator of heaven and earth and his was ignored and it was so devastating for him and and what was his response became very angry and his face fell rabbi mordechai shiffman he shared an important psychological insight that these were were two separate emotional responses that played in with each other at first glance they seemed like like anger and depression clearly there was shame and jealousy mixed in there as well as a whole mix of emotions now this is very human particularly particularly at the infancy of mankind to experience such raw and visceral emotions as jealousy and shame anger and depression i'm sure we can all identify with these emotions one way or another at some point in our lives at least but then god himself comes in and addresses kind and he gives him divine advice and hashem said the kind why are you angry why is it that your countenance has fallen if you do well shall you not be accepted and if you do not do well sin lies at the door and to you shall be his desire and you may and he may rule over you god says essentially don't be angry at your brother and don't resent him don't seek his failure or his downfall seek your own success you can be successful too draw inspiration from him fight the darkness fight the evil urge fight the jealousy i'm here waiting for your return now let's take a moment and look at these emotions anger what's wrong with anger well the sages of israel equate anger to idolatry the very act of being angry is saying this should not be happening now i know what should be happening now and this what's happening now is not what should be happening now but if we know everything is from hashem that everything is divinely orchestrated by god perfectly tailored for us to give us the maximum opportunity to grow and to refine our character and thereby come closer to him then we wouldn't ever be angry it's only when we believe that we are the creator and we know the way things should be it's only in those moments that we get angry and jealousy let's take a look at that in pirkei about ethics of our fathers it says jealousy lust and desire for honor take a person out of the world and i've always wondered and i've been thinking why is that the case i can understand it's a negative emotion but why those words that those are the things that take someone out of the world why and the answer hit me when one is jealous of their neighbor they have built an alternate world in their head that their neighbor's car house job wife whatever should belong to them in their minds they have created this fantasy reality and the more different this idea is the more different this ideal is from their actual life the more they're unhappy with the real world god's world god's world in which he knows what is best and he gives exactly everybody exactly what they need this sheds light on how god could even legislate the tenth commandment thou shalt not covet that's the tenth commandment it seems rather ambitious or even unrealistic to command someone to feel an emotion how can god tell us not to feel envy but now we can understand the reason because coveting isn't real it's an illusion it's no different than a doctor coveting the tools of a plumber or a farmer coveting the tools of an airplane pilot we're given exactly the tools we need to come close to god and to serve him and thereby live meaningful and happy lives and being jealous of anyone else's anything is merely a denial of god's kingship and as we see with cain we end up hurting no one but ourselves as cain spends the rest of his life wandering the world lost in sorrow and regret bearing the weight of his sin which as he said himself it's simply too great for him to bear now open your hearts my friends here is the real tragedy of the whole story rabbi khan passed down from ancient times that in my opinion testifies to its own truth the midrash says the kind was so filled with anger jealousy rage and pain that yes he did hit his brother but he didn't want to kill him he didn't even know there was such a thing as death and when abel fell to the ground king immediately regretted hitting him he fell to the ground next to his brother and he cried and he wept and he shook his brother saying wake up wake up my precious brother wake up i'm so sorry wake up the sages say that for three days he knelt next to his brother weeping begging him to wake up and he never did abel never woke up hashem abba there's so much hatred in the world there's so much jealousy so much envy so much resentment please hashem look down at your children look down at all of mankind and open our eyes you've been hiding behind the mask of nature behind the scenes for so long please hashem reveal yourself reveal yourself and banish the darkness with your beautiful holy light heal all the canes of the world banish their hatred and their anger and their depression and fill their hearts with light and love and revive all the ables bring them back to life so they can embrace their brothers and forgive them all of us here were all praying for redemption perhaps none of us even fully understand what completely what redemption even means i know that i don't fully understand but we all know that it's from you and we are praying for you for your light and for your peace for you're the only one who can bring true peace to the world thank you my friends thank you jeremy back to you