Rabbi Tzvi Seidman speaking at Mishmar Parshas Ki Teitzei at Scheiner's Shul

Okay, paras. Anyone that has listened or heard or read anything on this week's para probably started off with the remedies that many bring in that uh the says when you're going to go out to battle to war against your enemy and Hashem is going to give him into your hands you'll be victorious and you'll capture you'll take captives. Now many have probably heard the re that although this is speaking about an actual literal war that we go out against an enemy when wants to conquer more land says not one of the nations that we were commanded to to go to war against but wants to uh annex another country so they go out to war against one of their neighbors that's what this is referring to however all the say that this is alluding to the to the battle against the I'm sure you've heard this report but I want to analyze this a little bit and see how different things in the here fit in. Um the reason why it's so important to discuss this is because the the battle with the har is something which would like to almost deny that it exists or somewhat ignore to put on the back burner but it's really something that we live with every single day of our lives. As long as a person's alive he's being tested with something. He's not being tested that means he's on the that's why we're sent down here. was sent down there, you know, to work our way through it. And that's how we build ourselves, right? If if life will be easy street without any spiritual challenges, we wouldn't grow spiritually. In fact, the the gamarra says that when Hashem is going to the satan, he's first going to show him to the to the is going to look just like a little hair, this flimsy little sultan, this little tiny. And the idea there is that if a person never overcame the never grew and therefore that battle with the never went up in Madre just gives into every little thing doesn't have to build himself up. However, if a person does fight the for the and the appears like this massive mountain because the challenge is the thead built himself up. So said I'll give you a bigger challenge. This way you can continue to grow. If there's no resistance anyone that ever did any exercise knows there's no resistance there's no gain. >> No burn, >> right? No pain. gain, odo gain, whatever it is, right? Um, you know, there's there's a story with this guy that comes to the doctor and the doctor tells him, um, you know, you really you're out of shape. You got to do more exercise. I want at least 60 minutes of exercise a day. So, he says, "Okay, no problem." Doctor says, "I want to see you in a month." Comes back in a month. And the doctor says, "Uh, the guy doesn't look any better. In fact, he looks a lot worse." Doctor says, "Have you been doing your exercise?" says he goes, "Doctor, not an hour. 2 hours a day." Says, "Really? What have you been doing?" So he says, "I go rollerblading 2 hours a day." You go, "You don't look like you're rollerblading 2 hours a day." He goes, "Doctor, I promise. Here's what I do. I get I put on my rollerblades. I get on the treadmill. I hold on and I press go." Right? So here's the guy. He's rollerblad. He's going through life. He's rollerblading two hours a day, but there's no there's no resistance. Right? So he's not gaining anything. He's not right. Obviously, he's wasting his time. So if a person would go through life, I wouldn't have ness. So then there'd be no purpose in living. The purpose in living is growing spiritually through our challenges and overcoming them. However, we still have to find ways. There no life hacks for but there are approaches that the Torah gives us and how we going to deal with the with you know with the of the day and every day brings its own. So let's analyze these here a little bit. Again the swarm all say that this is referring to to the battle against the so let's see step number one you'll go out to war. So the says that the the prosecutor is telling you to be proactive. Don't wait for the battle to come to you. But you go out you go set yourself up. Make sure that you're set up for success because sometimes by the time you get to the battle it's too late if you didn't set yourself up for success. Right? A good army is not an army that when there's a war they can suddenly build up their army. The army is built before the strategy is there before the defense systems are there before and that all has to do with older put certain in place that we shouldn't ever end up coming to be over something. So >> the beepers planned that years ago. >> What was that? >> The beepers. >> Exactly. Right. That's a perfect example. The beepers. Right. So um got to plan it in advance. So when it comes to a person knows if I'm going to put myself in that situation, I'm going to end up having a big which is going to be maybe too difficult for me to pass. More about that later when we get into the par later later in the par. The next thing against your enemy. So the first thing is the first step in every war is recognize your enemy. More than that recognize that there is an enemy. The Gammorra tells a story. The Gamarra says that was and he refrained from eating from the carbonis of a nazer person would be in Nazer. So when he finishes his period of nazirus he shaves off his hair and brings carbon to the bash. And sadic would not eat from the carbon of a nazer because he was afraid or the mode is purely lashim and the gumar says a nazer really is like it's like a mix it's a nice thing to do it's a good thing to do but he also brings the carbonas because in a way he's holding himself back from pleasures of this world and that's something which person has to know if it's the right thing to do at the right time and place. So from he says besides for one time and he tells this story about a fellow that came and he was exceptionally good-looking and had this beautiful long hair and he comes to the base of he's going to shave his hair off and ring his car because he was in nausea. So Shimatic asks him why did you accept Nazirus upon yourself right with all these beautiful long locks that you have. Why would you do that? So he said I was a shepherd and one day I was I was uh bringing the animals to drink at the side of some stream or some river or some lake perhaps and I saw my reflection in the water and I realized how exceptionally handsome I am. And immediately I started getting these thoughts that I could use that for an available benefit. And then I said then I said I turned to the and I said why are you taking pride in something which isn't yours? Hashem gave you beauty. Why are you taking pride in it? So what's the key here? said wow unbelievable you this should be there should be more like that. And I ate from that. So what was this person's key to success in overcoming the sudden mass of the which overtook him? So one of the talis I don't remember which one it was he made cats said that that the idea was he addressed the sahara in second person. He didn't say I have a weakness. He said, "Russia, you evil one. How come you're taking pride?" He was addressing as if the you know two separate entities and he would have this conversation with him. And the moment he realizes, "Wait, there is an enemy here. There's a there's a force trying to push me into something which is bad for me." That's the first step to success. Recognize that there's an enemy. It's well known and documented that yes said that on different occasions they overheard the used to talk to his he used to argue with him he would you know behind closed doors but they overheard it someone once went up to the attic the used to go every day and he would hear the talking himself and say you know he he played it all out he had this charade say it's from maybe you know take a little easier on your learning he says what what do you tell me >> it's very likely that it's been documented in a places from different people that over different conversations had with the the idea there is that he's identifying an enemy once you identify your enemy and you learn your enemy you study your enemy now you can start to go to battle is going to give him into your hands if you're going to prepare in this way you recognize your enemy you prepare yourself in advance then you will be successful in this battle and you will capture its captives so this is an interesting thing and I not originally planned on saying but as I was driving here tonight I was listening to a short maybe four or five minute from my missro and he made a point of this means you will capture his captives your enemy's captives. So it could mean you will capture the captives that you got from your enemy. >> It can also be said you would capture those things that he captured. You will capture his captives. meaning as follows. The Gomorrah says when a person does proper chuva, so a vero which he had previously done turns into a so when he had gotten you once before, you are getting back. You're recapturing the captives. Those things that he got, you're now getting back. And and again, this comes with a proper cha, which is very appropriate for the time of year. With a proper ch prepare yourself, say, I know my enemy. I fell once. I'm not going to fall again because now I know my enemy. I recognize him. I can see him coming. I could sniff from him from a mile away. I appear myself. That's chuva. And with that the a turns into. Now let's just analyze this idea. Why is it that an a turns into it's like extra credit you get a bonus because you did chuva. I'm going to throw that in as well. The idea is here because sometimes when a person stumbles. We stumble. We go through life. There's no person right there almost was no person since the history of man began that never did an a however if your a is used as a springboard for something good the net of that a is a game so if if if it was used to bring a person to closer to their >> well not I'm not I don't know that what is >> that that term but it means a was done it was done for the wrong purposes >> you're learning from it >> but now I used my m mistake to grow I have a subar my history. What am I going to do now to build myself and be greater that this should never happen again? So at the end of the day, I am now a greater person somewhat due to that of error as long as it was followed up with a proper cha. >> So that was a building block in this new level that I've reached through my cha. >> So we get for that building block as well. >> Correct. That's what the says says that if a person that is amaz so then the the the goes through the which says it's too great for you to overcome and it's too great for you to overcome and the Torah gives you a way to navigate it. Now, at the end of the day, it's clear from the and from that the idea is that you shouldn't actually end up doing this thing. But we're not going to tell you you can't do it because that's going to be too, you know, too overwhelming. Says here are the steps I want you to take in order to get to where you want to go to in order to fulfill the ti that a person has. And through those steps, the ti will be diminished and hopefully it won't end up happening. Now just the idea that the Torah says this is too great for you to overcome and therefore I'm going to give you a way to navigate it tells us that every other can be overcome otherwise the Torah would give us >> what was that >> desire that at that point the the killed it so there's an interesting mindset I heard this story from an uncle of mine fifer was in baywater bazewater New Yorker >> fifer you know fifer So he uh he said of this he said there was a guy came to his reb comes to his reb says rebel I'm struggling with anas I very quickly lose my temper I get angry and I snap back at people what should I do so the reb says to him you know sit in my bish I'll get back to you in a half an hour okay guy sitting at a back table bish reb calls over the guy and he says uh you see that guy sitting there walk over to him holding a coffee in your hand and walk over to them holding a coffee in your hand and accidentally spill the coffee over him. You know, drop your coffee and get them all all dirty up. So, um now this guy's sitting at the back table, hears the rebel whispering this to the gaba. She's like, "I know what's coming." Guy looks over a few minutes later, he's got his coffee and he says, "Tell me, do you know where the next MKA is?" And as they're talking, as they're talking, he drops the coffee on him. Of course, the guy sitting there doesn't flinch. He was prepared for it, right? Few minutes later, the Reb comes in. He says, "Come, come into the office." He comes into the office and he uh and he and he um the Reb says to him, "What happened to your shirt?" He says, "Someone's pulled the coffee on me." So he goes, "Did did you lose your temper? Did you get angry at him?" The guy says, "Rabbi, come on. Not going to pull this off on me. We all know what happened." What do you mean? He said, "I know that you told him to spill the coffee on me. I was prepared for this." So the Reb says to him, "Exactly. I wanted you to hear that. You should know every time someone does something to you, Hashem sent them to you to give you this Nissan specifically. You know that this was a premeditated thing and this was meant to happen and it was you know this had to be there for your good whether it's for therapeutic purposes or sometimes the wants to give a person a certain Yeshua a certain you know she but says he still needs to earn it. So I'm going to give him an just allow him to earn it. If you knew that this was coming every single time, you know that it's prepared and was sent your way. So the challenge just just got diminished. So realize every single time that someone does something to you and you you know you have this urge to get angry or you have this you this instinctive reaction to to flare up. Realize that that was also planned. It was also said you happen not to have overheard the whisper but it was meant to be. So this again this is the message of this that says this messiah this is one that you're not expected to pass but every other nion was meant to be it was set up there you were put there in order you should be able to pass it. So that's um that's the lesson of that which says that the the is something which cannot be overcome in a natural way and we have to go through the method that the Torah gives us. Now let's fast forward a little bit and we'll see this is highlighted once again in the para of Ben a couple of very very difficult things to understand in the paren to make a long short right so there's this young man he was recently and he steals from his parents and he eats meat and drinks wine and he develops an addiction a habit let's call it and say he was warned once he got he was he got malistered already does the same thing again say if he doesn't get stopped in his tracks right now the endame game is that this person is going to be a murderer one day. He's going to be a highway robber. He's going to kill people to take their money because his parents are going to run out of money. He's going to be out of, you know, out of cash. He's going to have to feed his habit. And he's going to have no other way to do it than to um, you know, to come on to highway robbery and murder and take people's money. So >> yeah, there's a lot of details if it ever happened. It's very difficult for it to happen. So I'd like to let's go with the sheet that says it never happened because it's so difficult to happen. But the Torah is still giving it to us to teach us some lessons here. So let's get the lesson. Let's try to extract those lessons. >> Yeah. So let's extract those lessons from the right. So the Pik says, "What are we going to do to this fellow? He's going to get he's going to kill him." And Rashi says, "We prefer that he dies before he murders somebody rather than wait for him to murder." Which means knew that there is no way out. If he follows this path, he will murder. It's not like he might maybe who knows one day it's going to happen so might as well let him die innocent without any blood on his hands and go up to Shm at least he's clean rather than wait for develop it for him to develop into a murderer and then have him killed for murder so far I think we understand where the question arises as follows you know the four mis the bestd has at their disposal ski and skiila is stoning strafa is burning literally but they Right? >> Her is two words for in the Gumar. Her means being killed, but Sai is by the sword. That's decapitation. And is through strangulation. >> Now that's the four that I mentioned go in that order with skiil being the strictest and and strangulation being the least strict of the four. Now a killer, a murderer. Now no one's ever come back to tell us which one was more difficult. So I mean we trust in any case but that's the it's actually but it's in very good that's a shout out right to the >> mentioning >> number one and two is >> that story is not a >> that story is in maz and in so number one and number two is which one came first and which one comes first but everybody agrees that is more than s than her. Right? So now a murderer gets let's call it number three. Not top level, not second level, third level mis. This man murder is getting number one. How is he getting something stricter than if he would have developed into being a murderer? How could that be? The whole idea is that he's setting himself up for murder. >> How's he getting a punishment which is more strict than a murderer himself gets? So I believe I saw this for >> so >> you can go do it somebody call it call it but not great not a greater >> that's a very >> so culture takes the following approach I think it was rabban culture I saw this problem if I'm wrong please forgive >> so says as follows he says you know a person fell through the nilion of murder it's hard to imagine but he got so angry at another guy and they were in a that's it I've had it and he killed the person came with a passion caught up in the moment and he did something really really foolish. He's going to pay for it. He's getting killed in B. But then there's a guy that 20 years earlier someone said, you know, the path you're taking is going to end up bringing you to murder. And he says, >> oh, so what? >> No. >> He's not caught up in the moment. He knows this is where it's going to get him. >> And he's making a calculated decision to be careless with his life. cook >> that. Oh, so why is he not going to chas? We'll get to that next. Where's the next? How do we know he's not going to say the but cannot plead in? >> Exactly. Exactly. He's not close to that. >> You are setting yourself up. Right. So, this is really tabbing back into what we started the parish with. >> He knows what's going on. >> A person's mission is yes, the past is but more so prepare yourself. Set your path in life in a way that you'll be successful in. When a person is setting his path in path in life knowingly that this is going to bring to spiritual demise now is more guilty than the actual person who fails in his sight. Failing in his sight, that's not a good thing. He's going to get punished for that. But there's some consideration. He's not getting the greatest punishment. But if if a person knowing in advance is not taking the steps of precaution and he's just allowing his life to go you know they go with the flow wherever I live I live and whatever happens happens without taking that he say without being proactive to say wait a minute I got to make sure I never reach that point now for that he's more guilty than the murderer himself and therefore his his um his punishment is going to be greater now I want to go to the other part of murder which you mentioned that isn't he ever going to do Chuvo? So, this is a question, a famous question asked by many. Not is he going to do Chu, but it's asked a little bit differently and and I was walking through 18 based mish about 20 minutes ago, half hour ago, I heard someone talking about it over there. >> Did you read before he dies before he dies after >> that there's a famous ste there's a contradiction here because by Yeshua is lying under the tree and he's dying from dehydration and thirst. His mother has him out in the desert. So these says even before he does right these says that that heard while he was there while he's lying there under the tree. So what do you mean while I was lying under the tree? Where else did you hear it from? He's crying from under the tree. So Rashi says that the came to and said you know's grandchildren are going to cause the yen to die from thirst >> and now you're going to save him. So what does Hashem answer? What does Hashm answer right now? He's innocent. It's true. One I know that one day down the line his children, his grandchildren are going to cause Jews to die from from thirst, but right now he didn't do anything wrong. >> We're judging from what? >> Number seven. >> It wasn't that wasn't that was that the were traveling and they were thirsty and they came out with these jugs, these these leather filled with and they thought they're going to drink and they inhald it and they died. >> And I thought he was going to do chuva. So he was going to do chuva. >> Rash doesn't say that. That's true that at the end of life he did do chuva. But does not mention that there says that was Hashem's answer to the right now. He didn't do it yet. We look at the man in the moment. So the question is right were killing him based on his future. >> Look at the man in the moment. Right. So says as follows says by it says as follows. His parents bring him to and they say our son has he's gone off and he rebelled. He doesn't listen to our voice. Senator Ba Golinski. Yes, if a person is destined to go off to the wrong path, he's still not guilty. But the moment he shuts out anybody that might ever want to help him now, he doesn't stand a chance. >> What was that? >> Today, the problem the moment the person shuts up, God forbid so many people. Please don't answer today. Well, we're not we're not in the next >> but there are very few people as much as the mind says no there very few people that the path to their heart is totally shut off and I will listen to anything anyway explanation >> everybody no yeah yeah that's not the problem >> he isn't right because he's a curus we're answer >> we're answering a different question we're answering the question is he's truly is on the path to murder, but he didn't get there yet. So, how come you're punishing him now? The answer is that again, he set himself up that he can never veer off that path. How do he set himself up to not be able to veer off that path? Doesn't listen. Doesn't want to take anything in. He's not open for discussion. This is my way and that's how it's going to be. That guy doesn't he doesn't stand a chance. He's not allowing anyone to influence it. >> Exactly. We know maybe in a year now he will open up that they say oh I'm not listening so he's not actually open that guy's not actually not listening I'm not listening to you but there's some how judge that >> so if the Torah says then we know he doesn't listen >> that's the key is that he shut out all all meages I'll show you another thing from Mr. we have one >> today we can't >> and this is something really which >> today we can't we don't understand it >> we can't judge it we can't judge it but the can tell us that >> right >> um >> I'll share one more thing from our he said often times when a person is in a situation of that the the the against the complaint that the has on him is I >> okay it was one shot >> that was my second shot it's okay Simra >> said his father sometimes we learn this from Bum right what was the time against Bashem said he can go and he knew it was wrong to go but three times along the way Hashem sent him a little message right the donkey bears off the path the donkey squeezes his leg the donkey stops you're not listening buddy listen you're getting messages someone that's not open to listening will continue to go will continue to go and that's why we're confident that this man is never going to find a way out and let's just take this only to the end of the para just the idea of not thinking ahead you know this week is par doesn't mean the next week is pur >> but we're getting close to this we read par at the end of the param that he said that that on a year that two so we have 13 months between the pars right between the shabas full this year this year is not there's only one but next year will be so how could we be the dinners you're not supposed to forget if you mention something once a year That's considered remembering but it's more than 12 months apart. How do you remember? So he says we read at the end of the parish again this year it's not necessary but just mentioning it. So at the end of the parish it says remember what did he cooled you off along the way. Sash explains what does it mean he cooled you off? What's which means he made you cold. Sash brings a famous mush. The muscle is that >> that right there's a hot tub, a hot bath that's scalding and nobody can go in there and one guy comes and he jumps in. One wise guy, right? And he jumps in and he scolds himself. You know, it comes out of skin is burnt a little. But everybody else now sees it's possible and he's able to do it. So what's the title on this person and what is a Molly called? Just want to focus on his title in this rashi. It says benal is like a wild young man came but is an abbreviation words when he's describing the story says there hot tub and this ben comes bal is an abbreviation of the words bi oil don't bother me >> I have no respons I'm doing what I want to do right now without thinking what the consequences are going to be the guy's a fool he's going to burn himself I don't care right now I have this urge to break the fear that everyone has. I have to show that there's nothing to I'm jumping in. I It's going to burn in a few minutes, few seconds it's going to burn. That's not part of my calculation. I don't even look a moment ahead. Right? So this is right. Not even a moment ahead. Not even the immediate result, immediate consequence of my actions. I'm not taking into consideration. This is the exact opposite of what the parish began with. Parish begins with plan ahead. Think ahead. Every step that I do, what's going to be in 20 years from now? What are you going to look like if you continue this path? Right? The the the way for fighting the want start thinking ahead. What's this act going to be? If I'm hanging out with that guy, where is that going to take me? If I'm hanging out in this crowd, if I'm going to show, if I'm not going to, what's that going to do for me? Where is it going to bring me? And one thing leads to the next leads to the next leads to the next. And sometimes it could be one small tiny act could be the difference maker in a whole life. Right? And I remember once just in closing I grew up here in Spring Valley and the guy next door to us wasn't a form guy and once we outside in front of the house and the guy came collecting door to door. came to my house and my father gave him a dollar or whatever and then he goes to the next house and he looks to see if there's a muzo no muzzo and he skips it right most of the block wasn't I don't think Jewish right it wasn't what spring ali is today and and my father says to me just imagine if the guy put a muza on his door just even he didn't put a muzza just had a symbolic one without anything inside already he would have had opportunity for the mitzvah of sodaka right and who knows was weird where that would have brought him. This guy would have smooshed with him a little bit. >> Sexual person. >> A guy was going to order and he skipped this house cuz there was no muzza. Now, nobody would have envisioned that this muzza could bring to another. But sometimes that small decision sometimes you can envision it, >> right? >> So, but he wasn't a form guy. He didn't have on his >> Oh, that's what I was. >> So, yeah. So, um so sometimes a small decision that we make can really be a lifecher. Sometimes we don't know it but at least where we do know it we take these these steps these proactive steps that says that we go ahead and we initiate not necessarily the battle the battle but we we put everything in place that we are prepared for the battle with the and then when the moment comes the moment of nisan comes the battle is not taking place there the battle is already won before the before the nayan starts because sometimes at the point of nisan it might actually be too late it's already lost in the preparatory stages like you said in the beginning. Don't don't wait to make your army big. >> Make a dig now. >> Right. Right. So, we're preparing. I know what my weakness is. I'm not going to go to that place cuz I know that triggers my weakness. I'm not going to talk to that guy. I will talk to that guy cuz I know he gives me certain people, certain places, certain crowds just make you, you know, motivated to do good things and that t keeps a person away from the sight. And again, the key is if a person's not having a silliness, he's not living. The only people that aren't having are on 306 underground, right? Anyone that's still alive is having that's why we're here. So this par is essential for our continued existence in the right way. We should be all be canon and eventually we'll see the day when the we'll be able to celebrate. will see this massagate Sahara and we say that's the one that we faced and we conquered Chavis.